CHAPTER NINETEEN: Confessions

The Darkness was defeated, everything was back to normal, but I kept feeling like something was nagging at the edge of my brain. I stretched my wings, the doctors gave me pain med through my IV, now all I felt was sore, and occasionally tired. Luna, Frederic, Star Chaser, and Nova visited me at least three times a day, while Princess Celestia would just check up to give me updates about my condition. I was glad that the entire "Fake Luna Real Luna" was just a horrible dream that The Darkness gave me. I began to remember my life back on Earth, my old friends, this was my home now, in Equestria. One day Lance, Twilight, Spark, and Fawn came to visit me.

"Hey Ryan, how' you feeling?" Lance asked me.

"Better, the doc gave me some pain med through my IV, so I don't feel like I gotta scream whenever I touch something." I said, it had been a few days since I was in the hospital, it would take awhile before I could return.

"That's good to hear, me and Lance have been really worried about you. I heard about what happened in The Underground. We're just glad you're okay." Twilight Sparkle said with a smile. I looked over to see Spark with a goofy smile on his face. I was reminded of what I did, I could fix it, today.

"Can you uh... leave Fawn and Spark outside the room? I need to talk to you two." I said, it was time they knew the truth. Lance looked at me akwardly.

"Okay then," He guided Fawn and Spark out of the room, and explained they had to stay. Lance closed the door behind him.

"All taken care of." He said, I nodded at him.

"I need to tell you guy's something, something I did a long time ago, something I should have told you a long time ago." I said with a heavy sigh. Twilight looked at me, worried.

"I just want to let you know, you have every right to be mad, and if you want to, use me as a punching bag. I've held this burden upon my shoulders for too long, and it will break me if I don't tell you soon."

"What is it?" Lance said.

"It's about Frederic's father... Richard..." I sighed again.

"Yeah, Frederic sent him down to the center of the Earth." Twilight said.

I felt the scar on my cheek, the bandages had been removed, a large spear like scar ran across my right cheek.

"I... I sent him on Frederic after I learned Luna was pregnant." I looked at Lance and Twilight, horrified.

"Ryan... how... why?" Lance said, his mouth hanging open. I told both of them about that day, how my jealousy had taken over me. When I finished, Lance and Twilight, still looking at me surprised.

"Ryan... I..."

"That's not all. You ever wonder why Spark is so happy all the time? I thought... if I took away his negative emotions... when the time came... when I would... try to kill all of you... he wouldn't fight me." I looked down and covered my face in my hooves.

"Dorchester... Ryan... it's okay..." Twilight said, putting a hoof on my shoulder.

"Look at me Ryan, it's okay..." I lifted my head up to see Twilight's caring face.

"I have done... terrible... terrible things. If I hadn't been such... an idiot... none of this would have happened." I put my face back in my hooves.

"I'm a monster..."

Lance walked over and shook my shoulders.

"Ryan, you are anything but a monster! You're one of my best friends, and nothing can take that away from me. I understand what you went through, the pain, both physicly and mentally. Nopony deserves it."

"I... can fix it... I can at least fix Spark." Twilight said.

"No... I will." I said.

"No, you need the rest. Don't worry Ryan, we forgive you. It's all of the past. I'll go get Spark and Fawn... Lance," Twilight gazed over to Lance, who was still looking at me. I mouthed the words "I'm sorry,". Lance nodded at me and turned around with Twilight. I felt stress lift off my chest, it was over. Yet I still felt horrible...

I still felt like a monster.

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