There were a certain number of things that brought great comfort to William. The scent of parchment mingled with grass was one, cinnamon another. The joy of finally finishing a long book was nearly unmatched in every occasion. However, at the moment he was certain that absolutely nothing could possibly be more relieving than finally dropping from Eris’s shoulder to gaze up at the old oak tree building that he visited so often, almost like a home away from home.

“I hate libraries,” Eris grumbled.

“Shut up Eris,” he responded cheerfully, surprising her. “Let’s go fix our lives.”

William rolled his shoulders eagerly, taking a few swift breathes.

“Just leave the talking to me,” he said determinedly. “This time I’m going to be properly prepared, and I’ll explain everything to Miss Sparkle and we can get everyone back together and everything will be fine.”

“You sound more like you’re talking to yourself than you are to me,” Eris frowned, crossing her arms. He quietly noted that she still had not approached the library, leaving him antsy. “You sure about this?”

“What are you on about?” William asked impatiently. “The sooner we address the issue the better. I need to fix this. Okay?”

“… Look,” Eris’s shoulders sagged after a moment. He expected something, anything else out of her, but she simply looked at him with an exhausted, exasperated stare. “What if you’re wrong?”

“I’m never-“ he started defensively before pursing his lips sharply. “… I’m not. I can fix this, and everything can go back to normal. Okay?”

Eris blew a long breath through puffed out cheeks, running a paw through her wispy hair before throwing her arms up to the sky.

“This is some Sisyphean shit,” Eris sighed after a bit, dropping onto the sidewalk in front of the library and patting the curb a couple of times, eyes on the empty road. “Take a seat, squirt.”

“Eris,” he threw a hoof back at the tree-home, nearly falling over in the process. “Miss Sparkle. Important. Family. Today.”

The draconequus gritted her teeth hard in frustration, not budging an inch.

“Just sit down twerp,” she said through her teeth, narrowing a dangerous glare at him. He briefly considered resisting again, but the sheer force of her glare mysteriously caused his knees to begin to buckle. Once he finally dropped sullenly next to her, Eris still didn’t speak; she only took another few deep breaths, blowing out her cheeks every time and rubbing the back of her head in agitation.

“… Listen,” Eris clapped her mismatched hands together after an uncomfortably long stretch of silence. “I’m gonna say some things that you’re probably – well, definitely not going to like.”

“And you’re telling me this because…?” William pried edgily, eyes flickering constantly back to the silent library.

“Because then you can’t say that I didn’t warn you,” she deadpanned. “But seriously. I know how you get when you’re all huffy and puffy, and I don’t want this to go in one ear and out the other.”

“Right, firstly,” William frowned hard, his brows sinking so low that they nearly became his cheekbones. “Firstly, I’m not an idiot or a child, don’t treat me like one. Secondly, huffy?”

“I’m being serious! Just hear me out!” she crossed her arms again, tail twitching like a metronome behind her head. “Jeez, why is that so hard?”

“Alright, okay!” he held up one hoof defensively. Her skeptical look made him uncomfortable for a reason he couldn’t pin down. “I’m listening. I am.”

Eris only sighed again, running her paw through her hair.

“A’ight. Maybe…” she rubbed one arm awkwardly, staring ahead at the bare road. “Maybe we’re better off without anybody else.”

William stared at her for the longest time, utterly expressionless. She waited and waited, each second ticking by painfully slowly. At long last he finally gave a single, humorless bark that she supposed was intended as a laugh.

“I get it,” he nodded, lips twitching upward a little. “I’m not that gullible, Eris. I can’t say much for your sense of humor I’m afraid.”

“Did I not tell you that I wasn’t joking?” Eris restated slowly. “I’m dead serious.”

William did not seem to have a reply ready.

“… You see?” Eris puffed, chin in her hands. “I told you that you wouldn’t like it.”

“My god,” he breathed. “You really do mean it.”

“No shit, Sherlock,” she said emptily. “We don’t need ‘em.”

“Eris, that’s crazy!” William’s voice steadily grew louder, though he didn’t seem to notice. “There’s no way I’ll agree to that, it-it’s madness! I can’t just-just…!”

“Leave everyone behind?”

“… That’s not fair,” he answered uneasily, unable to meet her odd gaze.

“Oh, what?” she glared daggers at him, her voice bitter. “It’s not fair? Huh? It’s not fair to make someone promise and mean it to never leave, and then just vanish across all of existence? Is that right?”

“Are you still on about that?” William blinked. “Look, I already said I don’t know what happened to any other worlds or their versions of me, I didn’t-”

“Don’t give me that, you know exactly what I’m talking about!” she curled her tail around herself angrily, shooting him a filthy look and lowering her voice even further. “Do you have any idea? Just how long we looked for you? Do you?”

“This-this really isn’t a-a good time for this conversation…” William petered out weakly, desperately glancing back at the library. For some reason the look that she was giving him only grew more powerful by the second. A little voice in the back of his head called out for her to punch him – she certainly seemed like she wanted to. Or to shout again, something. Anything aside from that betrayed, hurt stare.

“Dad cried.” Eris lowered her voice again to nearly a whisper, looking away at last. “I’ve never really seen him do that before. He was… we were pretty upset. We thought you were gone forever.”

William buckled down, abandoning all hopes of entering the library peacefully. He spotted a lone figure in the distance down the road, ignoring it in favor of rubbing his temple tiredly.

“… I’m sorry.”

“Oh, you’re sorry,” she hacked out a weak laugh. “Well, that makes it A – okay then.”

“You don’t have to be so sarcastic. It’s unbecoming of you,” William said expressionlessly. “I wasn’t in my right mind.”

Eris started to snap at him again, but bit her lip after a few seconds of thought. She let out her umpteenth puff between her cheeks, wearily rubbing her eyes.

“… Yeah. I guess I should get that. Chaos sort of does that to people if they’re not used to it.”

“Hm?” he blinked. “Oh, you mean the crystal receptacle?” William asked. “No, that turned out fine, it’s fairly simple to operate with a touch of basic theoretical magic study, no different than channeling energy with another smaller, weaker focus.”

“… That just makes it worse!” Eris shouted so loudly that he nearly fell over, her fists clenched tightly. “You’re-you’re telling me that-that- you little-!”

“I was under hypnosis!” he held up his new hooves in panic, scrabbling away from the enraged draconequus.

“Oh, bullshit!”

“I was!” William insisted, feebly standing his ground. “Did Discord really not tell you anything?”

“He doesn’t tell me plenty but that sort of seems like the kind of thing he’d fucking share!” Eris turned away grumpily. “And even if you were, which I doubt, then how would he even know in the first place?”

“… I assumed he knew just about everything,” William admitted after a full ten seconds of silence.

Eris turned back to him at last, confusion on her features.

“… Why would you think that?” she tilted her head. The anger was still there, but subdued.

“Because… well… he’s still a god, right?” he rolled his tongue oddly around the word ‘god’, like it didn’t sit well with him. “I… well, I thought that he could just, y’know…”

“Have omniscience?” Eris blinked a couple of times, a wry smirk starting to show on her lips. “Uh… no. Not even close, dude.”

“… Because I asked him before how he managed to garner so much information,” William said blankly. “He said it’s because he’s a god.”

“Even gods need help,” Eris rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe – well, yeah, I can actually believe he let you think that, it is kinda funny. He can’t have his eyes everywhere at once, dude. That’s what the informants are for.”

“… Spies,” William spat in contempt.

“Agents,” she corrected him. “But back to the ‘hypnosis’ thing.”

“No,” he frowned hard. “I want to hear more about-”

“Because if you don’t have a really good excuse,” Eris said cheerfully, cracking her knuckles. “I am going to fucking wreck you.”

“Right,” William edged away nervously. “Right, of course. I was… mistakenly under the impression that Princess Luna had deliberately given me a cursed book in order to take over Equestria.”

“… That’s retarded,” she gawked.

“I know.” He nodded. “It seemed much more obvious afterward. My… senses of reasoning and comprehension were seriously altered by whatever was lurking inside the book. I really meant it when I said I wasn’t in my right mind.”

“… Cursed book.”

“Well, more like…” he struggled, holding his two front hooves in exasperation. “… I miss hands. Anyway, more like a, er, possessed journal that functioned with a piece of Princess Luna’s soul.”

“Holy shit, dude!” Eris balked. Much to his relief, all transgressions seemed to be temporarily forgotten. “You had a horcrux?!”

“A what?” William stared at her as if she were mad, which he was still thoroughly convinced that she was.

“Dude, why didn’t you tell me that shit?” the anger was swift to return. “I mean, Jesus! You’re telling me that you had something like that the whole time and never told me?!”

“I… I thought it should’ve been, um… secret,” he admitted. “I thought I was doing the… right thing…”

“Like going kill crazy on the yellow one? Fluttershy?”

William looked away miserably. She tried to meet his eyes again, but he seemed to be looking a thousand yards away. The figure in the distance had moved much closer, headed straight for the library with a rather heavy looking saddlebag, but neither of them noticed.

“… Sorry,” Eris shifted uncomfortably. “Might’ve… shouldn’t have quite phrased it like that.”

“It’s fine,” William said expressionlessly. “I indulged in a selfish litany of violence in exchange for nonexistent power, resulting in a further downward spiral. Maybe doing something like… that to someone so nice, to someone that actually cared was enough for the aspect of Nightmare Moon to gain a stronger hold.”

“… Hey, look at it this way!” Eris gave a forced smile. “Second chance. Something I never got, don’t take it for granted. You can go apologize later.”

William gave an unintelligible grunt as the mystery mare wandered right by them unnoticed, disappearing into the library.

“… So whatever happened to Nightmare book, anyway?” she fought to change the subject. “Or… possessed book… journal… spirit horcrux ghost… thing. Huh? What happened? You kill her too?”

“That’s something I sincerely wish I had never done,” William’s frown became so etched onto his face that it might as well have been paint. “Why couldn’t he take those memories out? And I didn’t kill the whole castle,” he said defensively, forcing the subject to something else. “I told you that. They were just, er… reverted.”

“Still,” Eris stated bluntly. “Gross. If it makes you feel any better, this place was way easier to fix.”

“You call this fixed?” William started, throwing a hoof around.

“Semantics,” she rolled a talon through the air. “You didn’t accidentally wipe out an entire solar system and damage your universe beyond all repair for all eternity.”

William started to reply before her words really sank in, leaving him baffled.

“… Wow,” he said, no other answer seeming anything aside from underwhelming. “That’s actually… how?”

“I dunno.” Eris shrugged and looked away. “I asked Dad to block that part up. I just know it was bad enough that I didn’t want it in my head forever.”

“… Forever.”

“Yeah, eternity,” she nudged him playfully in the side. “That’s how long we’re stuck together.”

“We?”

“And you tell me to pay attention!” Eris snorted, nearly budging him off the curb again. “Dude, that’s what I figured was going on the whole time; I thought you were just starting to turn, and your transformation just wasn’t as bad as mine. I never knew anything about this magic book bullsh-”

“Hold on, stop, stop, stop!” William demanded furiously, oblivious to the noise coming from the library behind them. “Go back, say that again?”

“Magic books are bullshit?” she blinked innocently.

“The other part! What transformation, what are you on about?”

“… Motherfucker,” Eris ran her talon through her hair in agitation. “You know, when Dad gets back we need to have a little get together. Ooh! With doughnuts-”

“Eris!”

“Right,” she said a little sheepishly. “Uh, right. You were… well-”

“Spit it out!”

“Supposed to be, y’know…” she rubbed the back of her neck with increasing awkwardness. “… Like us.”

“… Like us.”

“Draconequus…es,” Eris explained. “Dra-draconequui? Draconequuses?”

“… This is going to take some time to swallow,” William breathed, his head suddenly hurting. “I wish someone would have told me this before.”

“And now you know exactly what it feels like,” she punched him playfully. Eris then turned fully, grabbing his shoulders. “No, but, seriously. Be more open.”

“But-”

“OR I WILL SHAKE YOU LIKE A BABY,” Eris jarred him with every syllable. “We share everything from now on, understand!?”

“Eris stop, quit it! You’re going to shake my fillings loose!”

“You don’t even have fillings, now promise!” she insisted.

“Alright, okay!” he shook her off, scowling again so quickly that it might as well have been his default. “I promise, I promise.”

“Pinkie Promise?” Eris held out her pinkie on her paw.

“I don’t have pinkies,” William deadpanned, wriggling his hoof.

“Just Pinkie Promise me,” she rolled her eyes.

“I Pinkie Promise,” he tapped her outstretched finger with the edge of his hoof awkwardly. “Happy now?”

“We’d be happier if you stopped scaring away everypony.”

The two of them nearly leapt out of their skins, and William could have sworn that he heard his neck crack from the sheer swiftness of how quickly he turned his head.

The small dragon leaning on the mailbox outside the library gave them both the same slightly interested, cynical look.

“… Because you’ve been scaring away ponies for quite a while now,” Spike said slowly. “Twilight is about to go bonkers because two books have late fees now. Don’t mind her, she’s just crazy.”

“Believe you me, Spike,” William nodded sagely, refraining from looking at Eris. “I know the feeling.”

“Hey, my reputation recedes me!” the dragon gave a half-shrug. “Or proceeds, I, uh, can’t really remember. How come you’re a girl now, Discord?”

“I’m not Discord. ‘Name’s Eris, scion of mayhem and inheritor of chaos, madness incarnate!” she cracked her back before standing, towering over the little drake and sticking out her paw. “I don’t think we’ve met! You’re a cutie.”

“… Right,” Spike said with embarrassment, his frills turning a strange shade as he shook her paw. “I mean, I guess you can come in,” he started off and waved them both after him. “Twilight really wanted you gone because she thought you were Discord. He’s been kind of a pain lately. I mean, of course you could come in just about any time, it’s a library, it’s just like that, I mean-”

“You talk too much,” Eris said bluntly, patting him on the head and making him blush further. “Get the door for a lady?”

Spike clamped his jaw shut, nodding quickly and shoving the door open. What followed was an earsplitting, thunderous noise that no creature of Spike’s size should have possibly been able to make.

“TWILIGHT, IT’S NOT DISCORD, IT’S JUST SOME GIRLS THAT ARE HERE TO SEE YOU!”

“… I’m not a girl,” William shot at him, his ears still ringing.

“Oh,” Spike blinked, thoroughly unconcerned. “How come you’re pink?”

“There are lots of pink stallions!” he stamped a hoof against the floor defensively.

“Name one.”

Eris looked back and forth between the two, her giggles slipping through her fingers.

“Familiar little smartass, in’ne?” she grinned.

“Shut up, Eris.”

“It’s not Discord again?” the voice of Twilight Sparkle meandered down the stairs long before the rest of her followed. “Thank goodness, I thought we were going to have to replace another mailbox.”

“Hello, Miss Sparkle!” William greeted her cheerfully, though he was met by another face descending first. Much to his surprise, Twilight closely followed none other than Cheerilee, loaded down with a number of books spilling out of her saddlebags.

“Do you just know everypony?” Spike asked slyly.

“Shut up Spike,” William hissed under his breath before turning back to the mares. “Hello! Not busy, are you?”

“Oh, I won’t take up anypony else’s time,” Cheerilee chortled, readjusting her saddlebag as they reached the bottom of the stairs. “I know you’re a busy mare, Twilight, I won’t keep you from your job any longer.”

“Don’t worry about it, Miss Cheerilee!” Twilight replied warmly as Spike went for the door. “Anything I can do to help.”

“Oh, you’re such a dear,” the schoolteacher beamed. “I’ll have these back quick as a whip and right as rain – and thanks again!”

“See you next Wednesday!” the unicorn waved after her, standing in the doorway for a few seconds. The moment Cheerilee was out of sight, however, she slammed the door shut and whirled on Spike, her glower cold enough to freeze a bonfire.

“… What?” he shrugged.

“Why did you let Discord through the barrier, and why is he female?” Twilight’s suspicious stare was leveled directly at Eris, who seemed utterly unaffected.

“I’m not Discord,” Eris stated boredly, already sick of being confused for the elder draconequus. “And what barrier ‘you talkin’ about? We got in just fine.”

“It took a long while to develop a chaos-proof shield spell,” Twilight Sparkle explained, still uneasy around her. “More like a filter than anything. I suppose if you really were Discord it’d be a bit more obvious thanks to the alarms.”

“Christ, what’d he do this time?” Eris rolled her eyes.

“Aside from the usual?” the librarian rubbed her temples as Spike wandered off toward the kitchen. “Setting my home on fire ‘by accident’, turning all the rainclouds into cotton candy and making it a nightmare for the weather crew, making the sidewalk literally walk away and stop up traffic for two whole days, turning all the streetlights into exploding hayballs-”

“Alright, I get it,” Eris held up her hands, eyes widening. “Damn, dude’s been busy. You seen Dad lately?”

“Dad?” Twilight looked back and forth between the pair. “Discord’s your father?”

“Yeah, can’t you tell?” Eris slicked back her hair. “I have his chin.”

“Not that this isn’t a riveting conversation,” William interrupted dryly. “But we’re actually here on business, Miss Sparkle.

“And you sound like a colt,” Twilight blanched before sighing. “I suppose I should have known today would hold plenty more surprises.”

“Pink is a perfectly natural color for stallions!”

There was silence in the library, though it seemed much stiffer than usual. William cleared his throat, not intending to have begun shouting again.

“… Right,” he shifted uneasily. “I suppose re-introductions are in order.”

“Re-introductions?” Twilight’s eyes darted back to Eris, just in case.

“I suggest making some drinks and making yourself comfortable,” William said grimly. “I prefer hot tea with a spot of honey, Eris will have…”

“Pepsi,” she deadpanned.

“The same,” he continued unperturbed. “I would also suggest mentally preparing yourself and taking a seat, if you don’t mind. Miss Pie did not seem to take the information so well.”

“… What exactly is going on?” Twilight shifted slightly, her eyes never leaving them. William could see the faintest glimmer of light, albeit dim, gathering at the tip of her horn in anticipation. “Who are you two, really? What are you doing here, and what’ve you done to my friend?”

“Please calm yourself Miss Sparkle,” William shied away uneasily, quietly afraid of becoming the unwitting recipient of any rapid spells. “I – or rather, we – are perfectly willing to explain everything, but it’s likely going to take a while if you want the whole story. And I’m warning you ahead of time, Miss Sparkle; it’s a long story.”

“… I think I have the time,” Twilight’s horn alit, the ‘closed’ sign on the library window swiftly flicking around as the curtains yanked themselves shut. “This sounds like it’s going to get rather peculiar.”

“You have no idea.”

“Sister?”

“Yes, Luna?”

“Have the servants prepare the carriage.”

“So, then…” Celestia watched her sun settle in the sky from her balcony. “Time to strike.”