After another hour or so of conversation, both of the alicorns made their excuses and left the garden to Ares, Flash, and Twilight, who had been uncharacteristically quiet in spite of everything, much to the two males concern….

Well, at least Flash was concerned

“Ares, I’m telling you that there’s something wrong with that mare,” he told the human as he slowly tried to wheel him away, Ares putting the lock on his wheelchair just to bother the stallion.

Ares shrugged, looking at the purple unicorn, who had her back to them and appeared to be muttering to herself. “Whataya mean, Flashy? Even though she’s purple she seems like a pretty stable chick; she doesn’t seem like someone who goes nuts on a dime.”

The stallion grunted when his hoof was slapped away from the wheelchair's unlocking mechanism, “But look at her hair now, it’s all messed up and I think she’s muttering to herself. That doesn’t look like sane pony behavior to me.”

Ares made a dismissive motion with his hand. “Women always do crazy shit like that; she’s probably on her pony period or something.”

“But didn’t you hear that snapping sound when the princess talked about reading Hustler, I think-” Flash froze, stopping his sentence as a super crazy-looking Twilight seemed to appear right in front of the two.

“What are you two talking about?!” She asked in a high-ish tone, her eye twitching slightly as Flash bravely cowered behind Ares’s wheelchair, the human raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing much, Purple,” he said calmly, like a man who was trying to calm one who was insane. “Say, you really don’t look so hot…. Are you alright?..”

Twilight’s whole body twitched as she took a few steps toward the human and stallion, both of whom backed up with her. “Fine? FINE? I’m just peachy!!” She said “I’ve just had to figure a few things out and draft some hypotheses when I heard you speaking with my teacher and I have to say, I think I’m enlightened!”

“....Well, that’s great, Purple… I guess…good for you?”

“You were right, Flash,” Ares whispered to the stallion, leaning down to him. “The bitch lost it. How fast can you lug my ass-” Flash yelped as Twilight teleported beside him with a pop, the stallion jumping into Ares's lap in fright.

“The princess reads pornographic magazines regularly, therefore it must be alright to read such material out in the open as one would do with a book, not only for older mares but even fillies and colts as well,” Twilight said, spinning Ares around with her magic to face her. “And since she had confided that information to you there must be something special about you; there is more than meets the eye if you will.”

“Aha,” Ares said, gently picking up Flash from his lap and putting the surprisingly light Pegasus behind him. “That doesn’t make any sense at all and I don’t think I’m ready to eat the amount of crazy you’re dishing out right now so…” He tried to wheel away slowly, hoping that she wouldn’t notice until they were a good distance away, where when they would nope the fuck out.

Twilight continued like she hadn’t heard him. “So the only logical thing that can be concluded is that you need to be in a Playmare, or something along those lines. So that means, Mr. Ares,”

With a burst of magic Ares was wheeled right over to the unicorn, Twilight all but shoving her front hooves into the humans lap, barely missing his nads as she brought her face so close to his that Ares that could smell her eyeballs. “I need to take naked pictures of you right away,” Twilight gave Ares the creepiest smile that the human had ever seen. “Well, let’s get started!”

…

I stomped toward my room with Shiny in tow, the stallions face an expressionless mask as I threw open my door, using a damping spell on it as soon as Shiny closed it. No need for anypony to hear what I had to say after all.

I turned toward him, trying and probably failing to keep the anger out of my voice as I said, “Alright, I was going to bring you here to yell at you for the next hour for how dumb you’ve been,” Shiny opened his mouth but I shushed him before continuing, “But, I think you should be given the chance to defend your actions.”

I snorted, waving a hoof around as I took a calming breath. “So, Shining, could you PLEASE give me a good excuse as to why you, a PRINCE and just as much as a ruler of this kingdom as me, would tell my Aunts that, Ares, who can’t even stand, is a danger to us?” I forced myself to sit down on my favorite calming beanbag chair.

Hush you, bean bag chairs' have very calming properties, I think somepony did a science experiment on it a couple years ago that proves it.

“Go ahead, I’d love to hear it.”

Shining looked a little confused that he wasn’t getting a dose of hell-hath-no-ness from me before clearing his throat as he slowly paced around the room, collecting his thoughts, if I had to guess.

“The first thing I was taught as a guard was not to judge a book by its cover, that everything, no matter how small or weak-looking, can be a threat,” he began, facing away from me. “Another thing I was taught was vigilance, something that I’ve found to be just as important if not more than the first.”

“I didn’t see it like that until our wedding, when that ‘bug’,” he all but spat out the word. “Captured you and took my mind. I was told of an impending attack on Canterlot and I laughed it off, ‘who would dare attack the seat of the sun?’ I thought to myself. But it did happen and we only survived by the skin of our teeth.”

Shining turned toward me. “I promised myself that that would never happen again. I was going to make sure that the human wasn’t a threat to you or our people, so I did what anypony would do.”

“By telling my Aunts?” I snarled, getting up and going muzzle-to-muzzle with him. “Because there was anypony that could have stopped what happened that day, and because Ares is a love sucking creature with an army at his disposal, right, Shining?”

He flinched at that, “Cadence, I-”

“You know, that’s even a pretty good reason to be worried, but to bring Aunt Celestia and Luna to help? Shining, this is our kingdom, we protect these ponies, we bare the weight of this kingdom on our shoulders, and you're not even giving us enough credit to take care of ourselves!”

Shining snorted at that. “Cadence, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but ever since we’ve come to the empire we’ve been asking the princesses for help,” I narrowed my eyes at that as Shining kept digging his grave. “I mean, what do you call Twilight and her friends coming to save us from Sombra?”

I swear there was steam coming out of my ears. “You know why they came to help us,” I spat. “But Ares? He's not an evil monster, heck, our magic usually hurts him, what could he possibly do to us?”

“WE DON’T KNOW!” Shining roared, startling me. “WE DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THIS CREATURE!”

“YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ARES!” I roared back, adding just a touch of the Canterlot voice. “SINCE DAY ONE YOU’VE TREATED HIM LIKE A MONSTER!”

“I know it in my gut that there’s something wrong about him,” Shining said, containing himself. “But with the princesses here-”

“They’ll make everything better, huh, Shining ,” I snapped poking his chest with a hoof . “Because we just can’t cut it, huh? Because I’m too young or too inexperienced to deal with anything remotely dangerous.”

At least he looked slightly guilty as I continued. “What was it that were told when we were in school, Shining? That we should love and tolerate everypony, to help anypony that’s hurt or scared or lost, even if they aren’t ponies. I’ve tried to live my life following those words, even if you might have forgotten them.”

“He’s admitted that he might not even be from this universe, Cadence,” he said, trying to defend himself. “We don’t know if-”

“You don’t know, you ignorant, irritating stallion,” I said, so angry that I had tears in my eyes. “Ares is many things, he’s a loudmouth, a jerk, and someone that needs to be smacked upside the head,” elsewhere, a certain human, who was wheeling for his life, scrunched up his face for a moment. “But he’s not villain material,” the same human now, for some reason, felt indignation. “For buck’s sake, he wouldn’t even hurt a fly. If you would have spent more than just two minutes with him…”

I looked up at Shining to see the coldness in the stallion's eyes and I couldn’t help but wonder for a brief, brief moment if this was the same stallion that I fell in love with and married.

“But he’s still a monster to you right? Some freak that needs to be locked up to protect me.”

I turned away from him as he snorted. “Why are you defending him?” He demanded, “You’ve ignored every warning I’ve-”

I picked an envelope from our table and threw it in his face. “Open it,” I demanded, wiping the tears from my eyes. “That’s everything that the doctor and I learned from Ares. Every question that he was asked was monitored with a truth stone, and he can’t use any magic whatsoever to alter the results. Look, Shining, see what makes the monster tick.”

Shining looked unsure as he opened the big envelope, looking at its contents as I sat right in front of him, continuing my little rant.

“Look at how the monster has a family that he wants to get home to, or how he helps his baby sister with her math homework after work, even though he can't tell the difference between addition and algorithm .”

Shining’s ears splayed back. “He could be using some form of magic that he-”

“Or if you read a little more you could see that the monster works for a little corner flower shop that his uncle owns. I know, it makes me shudder thinking how evil that is.”

“I am not going to apologise for trying to protect my wife from a creature we barely know,” he snapped as I let out a humorless chuckle.

“Your wife can take care of herself, Shining, and she thinks you shouldn’t think of her as your item.”

“Cadence, I didn’t mean-”

With a spell a pillow hit him in the face with a good deal of force. “Get out,” I snapped, biting my tongue to keep from crying. “Until you start acting like the stallion that I fell in love with, the kind stallion that also helped his little sister with her homework and who always gave anypony the benefit of the doubt, I don’t want you sleeping in here.”

His gaze hardened and he set his jaw as he levitated his pillow behind, walking to and slamming the door, making me wince just a little bit.

I looked angrily around my room, in the mood to break something expensive, when I heard a gentle but firm tap on my door.

“Cadence,” a voice that sounded like aunt Celestia said “Could I come in?”

For a moment I toyed with the thought of telling her no before sighing, “Please come in, Aunty Celestia,” I said, quickly making sure that my face was tear-free as the door opened, revealing my aunt, who was looking at me with her usual serene look.

Silently, she walked over to me, draping a wing over my shoulder and giving my cheek a gentle nuzzle. I leaned into her as we lapsed into silence.

“Would you like to talk about it?” She asked as I snuffled, trying not to cry in front of her.

I shook my head, “No, not really,” I said as we lapsed into another silence.

Finally it became too much. “Aunty,” I said “Does it get easier?”

She looked down at me with an eyebrow raised. “Humm?”

I leaned into her a little more. “You know, ruling, making sure that everything doesn’t go nuts,” I looked down. “Dealing with husbands.”

She chuckled at that, not saying anything as I continued. “I mean, Shiny didn’t even have enough faith in us to wait for more than a week before he basically tattled on me. He forgets that I was also your faithful student, so I’ve had to deal with a whole lot of crazy situations, some that could be considered crazier than what's happening now.”

Aunt Celestia chuckled again as I beat down a smile, feeling better the more I vented. “You made Twilight’s life seem boring,” she stated, making me roll my eyes.

“I mean, I kinda understand why he did it, even I’m still a little paranoid about the whole wedding fiasco and there is an alien in our kingdom, but doesn’t he remember that you got your flank kic-” I couldn’t help but grin sheepishly as Aunty Celestia cleared her throat, a deadpan expression on her face.

“We all remember what happened, Cadence, there’s no need to bring my performance against Chrysalis up,” she said, switching back to her motherly look, her wing tightening around me. “Keep going, I see that you need to let this all out.”

“But could you at least tell me where Luna was during the whole disaster?” I never did get the answer to that.... I mean who doesn't see an invasion happening?

I think that was the first time I've even seen my aunt facehoof. “I was told she was in another session with her Psychologists, apparently she used a damping spell so they wouldn’t be disturbed,” She gave me a little shrug. “I would have been mad if that stallion wasn't doing such good work in introducing Luna to the present.”

I nodded my head and continued to vent a little. “The two of you saw Ares, you saw that there was nothing wrong with him, right?” I snorted. “I mean, he’s a gardener for crying out loud, and for some reason Shiny thinks he’s some world-destroying monster.”

“I’m sure Shining Armor was doing what he thought was right,” she said neutrally. “With Luna and I helping it would be all the easier in finding Mr. Ares a way home after all.”

“But the letter wasn’t about that!” I argued. “It was just about how there was this ‘creature’ that’s trying to turning me into its mind slave.”

“He was just worried about you, honey. You should be happy that you have a stallion that cares so much."

I grunted. “Ya, he cares enough about me to put somepony’s life in needless danger and make me look like a moron when in front of you guys. I mean, why am I the only one that's trying to give Ares a little measure of friendship and a shoulder to cry on?”

Aunty let out a quiet snort. “That stallion cries?”

I couldn't help but giggle. “He hasn’t for me,” I admitted, “But I can still tell that he’s scared about everything that’s happening to him.,” I sighed. “Aunty, I’m sure you’ve been married a bunch, do you-”

“Cadence,” she interrupted. “While it’s true that I have had my fair share of husbands, some of them good and some of them bad, and I can tell you with the utmost certainty that everypony’s marriage is different. Any advice I give you probably wouldn’t help you at all. Any problems you’re having with your husband needs to be sorted out between the two of you.”

I let out a sad sigh, just wanting to lay down and eat my feelings away after such a stressful day. “Okay, Aunty, thanks for letting me dump all of this onto you.”

Aunt Celestia gave me a little smile and a nuzzle before she got up and made her way to the door. “It’s what I’m here for, Dear,” she looked me in the eyes. “I can see that you are very passionate in helping this human by yourself, if you want Luna and I to leave--”

“No no,” I said unenthusiastically, rubbing my temples with a hoof. “I’m not going to turn you away from helping Ares just because I want to spite my husband. Besides,” I gave her a little forced smile. “Its been a while since I’ve seen you or aunt Luna or Twilight.”

She smiled at that, turning to leave as I looked around, oddly sad that I wasn’t able to rage-break anything. She might be right, I thought crossing my hooves. But Shining’s still in the doghouse until he stops being a bucker.

With a flap of my wings I flew onto my bed and landed with a sigh as I buried my head in my pillows. “I probably should go out and see what everyponies doing,” I muttered to myself. “I don’t want to appear as a rude houseguest and all,” I hummed thoughtfully, using a spell to cover myself with my blanket. “Eh, I’ll do it in an hour or so. Shining can do it himself if he wants to be useful.”

…

“Faster, faster, for Christ's sake, Flash, she’s gonna get us!” Ares yelled at the stallion behind him, who was trying to put as much distance between them and the crazy purple unicorn that was about ten steps away, trying to catch her prey for unspeakable science-y/naked things.

“I’mtryingbutshe’scheating!” The stallion answered as quickly as he could, dodging Twilight as she teleported right in front of them.

“Come back here!” The crazy mare roared, sending a bolt of magic their way and missing. “I only need Mr. Ares for at most an hour or two!”

“Piss off, Purple!” The human called over his shoulder as he held on for dear life when they made a really sharp right turn, almost smashing into Luna, who smiled when she saw the two.

“Oh, hello sir guard, human friend, why do thee seem to be in a hurry?” She asked, getting two grown men practically yelling into her ear.

“One at a time please, we cannot understand-”

“Oh, hello, Princess!” Luna watched with amusement as Ares and Flash rolled behind her when Twilight appeared. “Could I see Ares for a moment? He and I need to do a few things.”

Luna looked at the twitching unicorn for a moment, then at the cowering human and stallion. “May we ask what is going on?” she asked the human, who was eyeing Twilight warily.

“Purple over there lost her mind,” he said. “She’s trying to take naked pictures of me! You gotta help me, Princess!”

Luna just stared down at him, blinking slowly. “Why should we help thee?”

Ares blinked at the answer. “...What?”

Out of nowhere, what looked to be a slurpee appeared in the alicorns hooves as she sat on her rump. “We do not see a problem with what young Twilight is doing. We are assuming that thou will not be harmed during the taking of these pictures so we do not see what the fuss is about.”

“What?!” The princess shrugged, taking a loud slurp of her beverage as Twilight grinned maddeningly at her.

Ares yelped as his wheelchair was bathed in a purple glow. “Excellent! Now come on, Mr. Ares, I need to see if I packed my camera.”

“Flash, help me!” The human yelled, looking around for the stallion to see him sprinting down the hallway. “Flash, YOU CUNT! QUIT RUNNING AND HELP ME!”

“Nope!” was the guardspony’s reply.

“YOU’RE THE WORST GUARD EVER! NOW COME BACK HERE AND BE CANNON FODDER SO I CAN LIVE!!!”

“Every stallion for himself, Ares!”

As he was being dragged away the human cast one glance at his only hope, be it a doubtful one.

“Luna, come on, I’ll do anything if you save me from this purple psycho!”

Twilight giggled at that, sticking a hoof into the air. “For science!”

“PLEASE LUNA, IN THE NAME OF THAT IS HOLY!”

The princess looked up from her slurpy, a small smile on her muzzle as she asked, “Anything we ask?”

“Yes, yes!” Ares yelled, trying to put on his brakes on the wheelchair. “I’ll listen to your problems, I’ll take you out for a picnic, I’ll rub your goddamn hooves, just shoot her or something!”

The princess took a moment to think it over as the unwilling human and the crazy unicorn were about to turn the corner. “Oh, Twilight!” She called, trotting over to the unicorn, who had stopped in her tracks.

“Yes, Princess?” Twilight asked, still giggling as Luna came face-to-face with her.

“Young Sparkle, we have something that we need thee to do, something that is of the utmost importance.”

“And what is that, Princess Luna?”

Luna bent down to whisper into her ear, “Sleep.”

With that Twilight eyelids drooped as she tried vainly to stay awake. “What’s?...” Ares tried not to cheer when the unicorn slumped forward, Luna catching her with her magic.

“We think our sister will want to talk with thee, young Sparkle,” she told the unconscious unicorn. “While we do not see the harm in your shenanigans it might not be in good taste to have tried to strip Ares down to take pictures of him.”

Ares pumped a fist into the air as Twilight was teleported away in a flash of magic. “You really saved my bacon, Princess,” he told Luna who cocked her head at him with a confused expression on her face.

“...We did not save your bacon, we saved thou,” she told him, sitting on her rump in front of the human.

“...It’s a figure of speech… Where did you get that smoothie? I mean it looked like it just appeared out of nowhere... and where did it just go?” a confused Ares asked.

The princess ignored the question as she slowly circled around him, like a shark would her pray. “Now, we believe that you owe us a debt.”

“I’m a man of my word,” the now uneasy human replied, hoping that he hadn’t just hopped into the fire. “So….”

He didn’t feel any better when he felt Luna’s breath on the back of his neck. “Yes, yes we do have something for you to do.”

“Just tell me,” Ares meekly said, grimacing when Luna whispered into his ear. “Really? You want me to do that?”

“We could go and wake up young Twilight if you prefer.”

“… You planned this did you?”

Luna gave him a guilty smile. “We may have foreseen this happening, but it doesn’t matter human, we will see thee tonight!”

Ares groaned as Luna was gone with a flash of magic, Flash poking his head out from the corner. “Did we win?”

The human turned toward him, putting his head in his hands. “Just get your worthless ass over here and wheel me around before I get up and throw you out a window.”

With a careful look around, the stallion trotted out from his hiding space, getting behind the wheelchair and wheeling the human down the hallway. “So where do you wanna go?”

“Just take me back to my bed.”

“....Ares, are you mad?”

“No, you shut your whore mouth, you don’t get to ask me shit after leaving me with purple madness and the weirdo princess.”

“...So you’re mad?”

…

Shining walked through the halls in a foul mood, grumbling to himself as he looked for something to unleash his frustration on. I can’t believe I’M the one that got yelled at, he thought as he ignored the saluting guards that he passed. I mean, how am I in the wrong? There can’t be anything wrong with a stallion wanting to protect his mare from some creature that he doesn’t know!

And, for some reason, he was getting this odd feeling of guilt as he remembered some of the things that his wife had said to him. Though he didn’t tell her, the stallion really hadn’t liked the idea of going behind her back to tell the princesses about Ares.

But I had to. Even though I hate to admit it and she doesn’t want to hear it, we weren’t ready to deal with this on our own! I mean-

He stopped as he saw the main architect of his marriage problems being wheeled down the hall toward him. He couldn’t help but grit his teeth as his and the humans gaze locked together. “Flash, stick your wings in your ears,” he heard the human say.

Flash Sentry looked a little confused. “What?”

“Will you be able to hear if you do it?”

“...Probably not, why?”

“Alice and I need a one-on-one and I’m sure you don’t want to hear it so shut up and do it.”

Now he’s ordering my soldiers, the captain thought as he trotted over, trying to keep the anger off of his face.

“Mr. Ares,” he said, trying to keep a civil tone. “You look like you want to speak to me.”

The human raised an eyebrow, motioning Flash to start pushing the wheelchair, his wings jammed ridiculously into his ears, with Shining following. “So you got your balls busted, right, eh Lilly?”

Shining gritted his teeth at that. “My marriage is none of your concern, human.”

The human nodded, leaning back into his chair and closing his eyes. “Hey, I’m just trying to make polite conversation, you know, that’s what two grownass men do first when they need to vent some stuff out.”

Shining snorted. “I will not apologise for my actions. I thought you were dangerous and-”

“Made the worst marriage mistake of your life,” Ares interrupted, “Shit, I’m not married and even I know that the women is always right.”

“She was wrong about not telling Celestia and Luna about you,” he muttered as they turned a corner, walking back into the gardens. “Cadence and I don’t have the experience that deities that have lived for thousands of years have, I did the right thing.”

The human snorted. “Well, you should have just done some shit behind the scenes, like put a power collar on me or something, not make Candy become unsure of herself and making yourself look like a diltz.”

The unicorn turned to face the human, “I know that you are dangerous. When the princesses find that out then-”

“Then what, Gertrude?” Ares snapped, poking the stallion in his chest. “They’ll fucking take me away and you’re wife will forget your stunt and everything will go back to normal? What if that doesn’t happen ya ass?”

Shining looked unsure for a second. “We-”

“What if I’m just a normal guy? Are you willing to risk your marriage because of a gut feeling?!”

“Don’t tell me how to manage my marriage!” Shining snapped, his face touching Ares’s.

“Well, someone fucking needs to.”

Shining’s horn started to glow. “My Cadence’s safety means everything to me!”

“But her happiness doesn't?”

The stallion stopped, his anger draining away as he stared wide-eyed at the human, who crossed his arms. “What do you think your bullshit is doing to her, huh? Wanna bet me money that she’s in her bedroom crying right now?” Back in her room, a certain princess’s ears swiveled as she ate her tub of mint icecream.

Ares leaned back into his chair. “Look, you don’t like me and I think you should just hop on one, but how about we grit our teeth and at least try to be civil to each other while I'm here?”

Shining sat on his rump, a confused look on his face. “Why?” Was all he asked, hoping that the question was clear.

“Because I like, Candy,” the human replied, “She’s a nice girl and deserves a better fucker than you, now are you gonna shake my hand and man the fuck up or are you going to keep being pissy?”

A part of Shining wanted to tell the human to buck off, but all he could see was the tears in his wife’s eyes when he left. With a snort he offered a hoof, which the human took.

“I still don’t trust you, creature,” he told the human, less angry than when he started the conversation.

“Ya, well fuck you too, Velma,” Ares replied, “Now you apologise to Candy or I’mma get up and whip your ass.”

Shining grunted, getting up and leaving the human, “Bucking....” he muttered to himself, not seeing Ares giving him the finger.

“Fuckin’ putz,” he muttered as Flash took a wing out of his ear.

“Ares, are you done?” He asked. “Because this is starting to hurt.”

…

Later that night.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this… Why are you making nursey do this with us?”

“Do not lie, my human friend, we know that you enjoy this,” the princess said as she wrapped her hooves around the uncomfortable human, who had his arms around an uncomfortable nurse, all three of them in a super cuddle bundle on the human's bed.

“But you’re making it weird,” he complained as she nuzzled the top of his head, laying a wing over the three of them.

“We do not see how anything we-”

“You grabbed my ass.”

“...We will not apologise for that, we wanted to see how voluptuous you were and we were not disappointed.”

Ares grunted, tightening his grip on the nurse, who was so red that her blush almost reached her chest. “It still makes this weird. Can’t you just get some stallion to do this?”

He looked up to see Luna looking away from him sadly. “We would, but we are rather feared amongst our ponies…”

She let out a little squeak when she felt the sensation of her ear being scratched. “You, scary? Puff. I’ve seen scarier kitty-cats.”

The princess couldn’t help but smile as she closed her eyes. “We thank thee, Ares.”

“Stop touching my ass, Luna.”

“...Thou cannot stop us, and, as they say, ‘Dat buttock though.'”

Author's Notes:

And there's another one...

I'm liking how I'm easing myself into the Cadence/human relationship budding; you kinda gotta do that with a story like this.

Sorry about the whole 'Cadence's not really in this chapter' thing, but everyone had to have there two cents in this chapter.

But I like how I had to put myself in Shining's shoes to figure out why he acted the way he did. I mean, shit, I wouldn't have trusted an alien with my bitch or my homies after getting my ass kicked so hard by a bug. :)

Oh, and its WIL_I_ZIN's fault for making this chapter less serious than some of you may have liked. I wasn't going to even do the whole crazy Twilight thing but he put the thought into my noggin and I couldn't get it out.

...So until the next one I guess...

Man, these notes aren't getting any better...