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Cupcakes Motherfucker

by xGeniPoni

Chapter 1: 'The Deep Reunion of Mere Acquaintances'

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You’re a worker at the Ponyville Insane Asylum; you’re guarding the newcomer, a cannibalistic pony who has a taste for pony cupcakes. You’re slightly scared as you pace around outside the door; murmurs of insanity fill the air, creeping you out even more. Sure there are other guard ponies around you, but you don’t get along with others; you’re shy - like that Element of Kindness chick - the guard ponies don’t even notice you, or anyone in the Asylum for that matter, which is why you took such a shitty job in the first place.

You’re usually very calm when it comes to these types – the insane ones, the silly ones, all types of crazy. But this was different. You knew this girl from high school, and were regretting this day for a few months now, being the only Asylum in Ponyville. And with the current economical standards, getting a new job is like going to the Rainbow Factory, you’re fucked either way. You suddenly hear a scream from behind and then a large screech as the pony charges at the door, her hooves clawing at the steel as she looks straight at you through the tiny gap with large, stunningly blue bloodshot eyes. You can’t believe that this monster used to be the bright and happy, popular party-pony Pinkie Pie.

“Mmm, I bet you’re delicious, do you want some CUPCAKES? I could make you some if you let me out.” The filly growled out, different to how she used to sound. You could tell insanity had corrupted her soul.
“Uh, no thanks, Pink’, I already ate.” You said, sweating profusely as you notice how her voice has changed from the high-pitched voice from school, to this horrible slur of words and tones; a complete change of character - like she’s possessed.
“Aw, why not? Are you a scared little SHIT or somethin’?”
“No.” You said, rather emotionless.
“Well, you don’t sound too conVINCING.” The pony said as she began laughing maniacally.
At that, you just stopped talking, slowly lowering to the ground; getting way out of her range of sight. Pinkamena gave up too, sounding as if she went to sleep. So you were safe. For now.

After an hour, you began to think more about the old Pinkie, the girl you knew, but didn't exactly know. After three, you began feeling saddened. But after five hours of work – you were just plain confused, and wanted to know more.
You decided to look in. “Hmm…” You murmur to yourself, not seeing anything.
“Hey, Pink’? Are you there?” There was no answer. “Okay then, I’ll leave you alone, but just so you know, we were in the same Home Economics class together all throughout high school, the one Mrs. Cake taught.”
When you recieved no answer you huffed and went off on your break, allowing another pony to take over.

“That pony… she’s just so… fucked up now.” You said - confused, as you sat outside staring up at the night sky, leaning forward on the railings.
“Dude, we work at an Insane Asylum.” Said the light brown colt smoking beside you on the pavement, he had long chestnut brown hair which covered his hazel eyes. He looked and acted like a mix of stoner and metalhead. This annoyed you, but I guess he’s all you got.
“Well you didn’t grow up with her.” You said with a sigh as you looked down, closing your eyes.
“Touché,” The colt said with a serious tone.
“You don’t even know what that word means.”
“Shut up.”


Unfinished chapter, but will finish as soon as possible, especially seeing that I need to finish this before I even start my school project.

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Cupcakes Motherfucker

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