The Wheel and the Butterfly

A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga

Part 8 Dan & Pinkie Vs. Ordinary Week

Chapter 65: Pinkie Vs. Vampire Lord

*****

Deep beneath the city streets of Los Angeles, a grim king sits on his ornate, wooden throne and broods. Resting his chin atop his fist which is propped up by his arm that rests on the chairs rest. Pale of skin, pointed ears, with closely cropped black hair, wearing a black long black tunic with gold trim, a blood red cape, black pants, black boots, and an assortment of ornate golden rings, he looks very much the part he has set for himself; a dark ruler overseeing a dark clan.

His throne room, likewise, was colored to match his outfit. Black and red curtains hung about what would otherwise be a bare and rocky room, and a blood red carpet led from the throne, down a half dozen marble steps, and over a marble floor to an open entrance.

Only the ever-present line of lamps on the walls which matched the rest of the cave shared commonality with the décor of the room.

I should have expected that these two would not behave as demanded.

The vampire lord glanced down at the boxy device next to his throne.

Well, I suppose the whole plan hinged on their irrationality, and these two have shown themselves quite capable. It’s no surprise my children are having difficulty. It wouldn’t be worth turning them if it were so easy to have them.

His head perked up at the sound of approaching footsteps. The vampire lord adjusted his pose, sitting attentively upright and setting serious eyes forward as one of his brood stepped into the chamber and looked up towards the throne.

“Lord Cruor..?” The male subject called out tentatively. His dress was similarly dark and dated.

The vampire lord remained devoid of outward emotion, however his subject’s tone told him plenty.

Bad news, it would seem. No matter they will come to me in time.

“Report.”

“Er, we found Leanan Sídhe…decapitated, sire.”

Cruor allowed himself the smallest hints of surprise in his features. “Oh? That’s unfortunate…she was…” he paused as if searching for the correct word, “useful,” he offered, “and a fairy’s favor is not something one is likely to come by twice.” His face returned to its stoic, almost emotionless state. “I take it the targets are still being searched for?”

“Yes sire…” The vampire replied.

“No matter, they will be found in time.”

The two paused as female vampire an elegant, black dress entered. “Sire! We have the one called ‘Pinkie’.” She informed.

Cruor allowed himself the smallest of smiles. “Good, show her…”

“Hello Vampires and Vimpiresseses!” Pinkie said as she entered the room, Mr. Mumbles perched on her shoulder and a red wagon containing Cratey following behind as Pinkie pulled it along.

The two vampires who had been reporting to their lord suddenly put on mortified expressions.

“…in.” Cruor finished as he knitted his brow.

“Oops!” Pinkie exclaimed as she looked around. She giggled. “Hehehe, Just the one Vampiresses.”

“Sorry boss!” Ed offered, quickly following behind Pinkie. “I couldn’t stop her…and everyone else seems to get sick around her!” He explained.

Cruor paused as he attempted to figure out where to even begin. He decided to ignore that one of his fledglings had addressed him as ‘Boss’, a common annoyance. Deciding to focus on the much more pressing matter that one of his targets was

A. Here

B. Came with a house cat and a crate that was dressed up and wrapped with metal wire of some sort.

C. Apparently possessed a previous unknown ability.

“You must be head vampire chief guy!” Pinkie announced, pointing up at Cruor.

The two old-fashioned dressed vampire’s gasped.

“You will address him as ‘Lord Cruor’!” The male insisted.

Pinkie pulled a disapproving face. “That’s way too stuffy!” She insisted. “Ooooh! Ooooh!” She began as she excitedly jumped up and down and clapped her hands. “He can be ‘Master Vampire of Parties!’” She declared.

The Ed and the other two vampires stopped and simply stared at Pinkie.

“No wait! MVP! I get it!” Ed declared, holding an index finger up.

Pinkie clicked her fingers and pointed both index fingers at Ed. “See! Can I come up with awesome names, or what?!”

“Merow!” Mr. Mumbles replied.

“Listen, human,” the female vampire began, as she practically spat out the word ‘human’, “You will show Lord Cruor respect or…” She placed her hand on Pinkie’s shoulder with the intention of gripping hard and inflicting pain. What actually resulted was a wave of painful sickness that entered through her hand and washed over her body.

The female vampire retracted her hand and took a couple steps away from Pinkie.

“What?” Pinkie asked. “Is it my breath?” She zipped over to the male vampire in old fashion getup blew into his face.

“GAHK!” The vampire choked out in response, covering his face and also retracting from Pinkie.

“Oh! Right…garlic breath!” She said with a smile. “Tee-hee, I guess that explains it.”

“ENOUGH!” Cruor roared from his throne. “I will have order in my own throne room.”

The vampires paused and obediently turned towards their rules.

Pinkie, on the other hand, slumped her shoulders and pouted. “Well, that’s no fun!” She replied. She turned to Ed. “I thought you said this would be a rockin’ vamparty!”

Ed chuckled nervously, looking up at the vampire lord as he shrugged.

Cruor gave his fledgling a contemptible, disappointed glare.

Ed’s expression turned worried, though he had very little time to dwell on his upcoming punishment.

“I know what we need!” Pinkie declared. “We just need to get a little action going to get things started!” She quickly glanced over her surroundings and noticed the familiar sight of the LED lamps along the walls. “Oooo! Oooo! Let’s see what pulling on these do.”

Before anyone else could react, Pinkie zipped over to the lamps and began tugging on them in rapid succession.

‘THWOMP!’

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

The male vampire screamed in agony as a large, rectangular, spiked rock fell from the ceiling and landed on him.

Ed, the female vampire, and even Cruor put on utterly shocked expressions at the scene in front of them.

“I CAN FIX THIS!” Pinkie insisted as she feverishly tugged on more of the lamps.

‘THWOMP!’

“AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

The female vampire joined in the males pained cry, as another spiked rock fell from the ceiling and crushed her beneath its weight.

“Oh geez!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Let me just…”

Ed quickly rushed over and placed a firm hand on Pinkie’s shoulder.

“Uh, maybe we can sort out what the lamp traps do a little later…” He suggested.

Pinkie sighed and bowed her head. “Yeah…alright.” She agreed meekly.

“Uh? Boss?” Ed asked tentatively, looking towards the vampire lord for direction.

“Just get her out of here, for now!” Cruor commanded pointing towards the exit with one hand, the other being used to cover his face as his elbow rested on the throne’s armrest.

Ed nodded. “Sure boss…” He turned towards Pinkie, and motioned out to the door.

Pinkie grabbed her wagon and slowly trudged out of the room as Ed followed.

Cruor sighed as he looked over his subjects that thrashed under the heavy rocks. He glanced towards the line of lamps along the wall and stood up off his throne. His usually calm demeanor was stretched pretty thin at this point.

She’s incredibly unpredictable…

Cruor made his way down the steps towards the wall.

Hopefully she can be controlled once turned.

Before he could pull one of the lamps to release one of his subjects, the hall outside erupted in commotion, the lights outside the hall were flickering off and on.

“What now!?” He uttered angrily as he stormed out of his throne room.

Out into the hall.

“Uh…” the male servant uttered from under the rock. “We’ll just…wait here then…”

“WHAT IS THE MEANING OF…” Cruor paused as he looked over the sight in front of him.

The grand hall was a large, open area of the cavern where many of the tunnels met. Several dozen of the vampire lord’s brood had gathered and where currently circled near the wall of the cave as the lights continued to flicker on and off rhythmically.

Cruor sighed.

She’s found the halls switch, I see.

He made his way to the group, all his brood parted for him, many of them bowing as he approached and grimaced as he finally made it to the open center of the circle.

Pinkie was dancing with a random female of Crour’s brood. Said female looked ill unto of her already deathly look. Next to them on the floor, two of his brood already laid down in a heap, their mouths foaming. A quick glance showed that his children were getting more and more terrified of the pink haired girl in the long red coat. Their behavior had turned into something not unlike penguins near an open hole in the ice with a potential lethal threat below; they stood neatly in a circle around Pinkie, but others would often nudge or even shove ones by them slightly closer to the girl, afraid that they might be the next ones she attempts to dance with.

“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Cruor roared.

Mr. Mumbles stopped batting at the hidden switch in the wall as Pinkie let her latest victim collapse into the heap below.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Master Vampire of Parties, did you want to dance?” Pinkie asked.

The group went deathly silent.

“I get it!” An errant voice shouted out.

Pinkie grinned and pointed both index fingers towards the voice in the crowd.

“This is no time for dancing!” Cruor insisted.

“What are you talking about?!” Pinkie exclaimed. “It’s always time for dancing! Hit it, Mr. Mumbles!”

With that, the lights began to flicker, and with a speed that surprised even the vampire lord, Pinkie reached out and grabbed both his hands, dragging him into the center of the circle.

What had afflicted his children suddenly became a lot clearer. Though stronger, and more resilient than his children, Cruor felt a wave of discomfort that radiated from his hands as Pinkie swung him back and forth wildly.

He forcefully broke contact with Pinkie. “YOU WERE NOT LED HERE FOR THIS PURPOSE!” He roared.

Pinkie pouted as Mr. Mumbles ceased batting at the switch again. “Mew?”

“Well…why was I led here?” Pinkie asked.

Before Cruor could answer, a couple pained screamed broke the silence.

The vampires turned towards the commotion. Two of their numbers writhed in agony, silver bayonets stuck in their torsos.

“Awrite ye unholy, filth ay th' nicht.” Dan said in his best Scottish accent as he grinned manically, and reached into his coat once more. “I’ve come tae claeem what’s mine.”

Author's Notes:

It's apparently Vampire day with me, today.