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The Wheel and the Butterfly A Dan X Pinkie Pie Saga

by Justice3442

Chapter 137: Part 14 Pinkie Vs. N.A.R.F.: Chapter 120 Dan Vs. N.A.R.F. High Council Members

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The Wheel and the Butterfly
A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga
Part 14 Pinkie Vs. N.A.R.F.
Chapter 120 Dan Vs. N.A.R.F. High Council Members

-ooooooo-

“BEWARE!” Dan cried as he threw open the double doors. “THE EMPLOYEES OF WALLY’S—”

“WELCOME TO THE SECRET HEADQUARTERS OF—”

Dan stopped and shot an irritated glance up at Balthazar as the two realized they were speaking over each other. Balthazar sat on a chair that was up a series of steps. He was flanked on either side by two more chairs occupied by the other two men depicted in the pictures that lined the hallway. Lights from high above shot down upon the three men and the group who had entered through the double doors. The rest of the area was cast in shadow, making it difficult, if not impossible, to determine the size of the room they were in.

Balthazar gave Dan a surprised look. “I’m sorry, were you trying to do a thing?”

“I was!” Dan cried. “I was totally trying to do a thing, and you wrecked it!” he said as he leveled an accusing index finger at Balthazar.

Balthazar brought a purple-robe-covered arm up and stroked his beard. “Sorry, no one has ever tried to do their own thing before.”

“Don’t be sorry!” Melchior croaked out, his face obscured by his cloak. “This is our domain! He should apologize for stepping on your line!”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Caspar chimed in a slightly upbeat tone. “I think it’s refreshing someone is showing a little more initiative.”

Melchior folded his arms and seemed to even sulk slightly. “You always say that whenever someone does something out of the usual!”

Psshaw…” Caspar said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “So what? You’re always upset if someone does something out of the ordinary!” He frowned. “If it were up to you, you’d make everyone file in one at a time and fight to the death to join.”

“And what is wrong with a fight to the death?” Melchior demanded.

“Well, they’re a bit played out,” Caspar replied.

Balthazar chimed in. “Also bad for the enrollment numbers.”

Melchior raised his robe-covered arm and pointed a withered hand at Caspar. “If it were up to you membership would be based on what everyone’s favorite color was!”

Caspar narrowed his eyes slightly. “Oh, now you’re just trying to be hurtful for the sake of being hurtful! Not every day would be favorite color day!”

Balthazar scratched at his beard as he stared up at the high ceiling. “You know, I’m not sure I’d mind knowing what some of the potential member’s favorite colors were, anyhow…”

Melchior let out a low, gravelly grumble. “So you’re taking his side. There’s a surprise…”

Balthazar put his hands up defensively. “I’m not taking sides, but I do like keeping the tests interesting.”

Caspar motioned to Balthazar. “See! A little variety is all I ask!”

Chris scrunched his brow slightly as he walked up to Ninja Dave. “These are the local leaders of the N.A.R.F.?”

Dave raised an eyebrow. “Would you prefer they just got mad at Dan and tossed everyone out?”

Uh, fair enough…” Chris replied.

Dan scowled up at the three quarreling men. “Are you three done?! My girlfriend is slowly running out of cookies!”

Daaaan~” Pinkie begins in a maternal tone, “let the secret triumvirate of a shadowy organization of foodservice workers figure things out on their own. Omn…”

Balthazar held up a hand. “Now hold on a minute,” he peered at Pinkie with what appeared to be his good eye. “Are you hyperglycemic, girl?”

Pinkie shook her head. “Noper!”

Melchior slowly raised his hands and pointed at Pinkie. “I recognize this girl. She has been marked for death by the organization for forfeiting a duel.”

Dan angrily glared up at Melchior and opened his mouth to speak, but Ninja Dave quickly stepped forward. “Yes, that’s true… ”

“WHAT?!” Dan cried. “Traitor!”

Dave turned to Dan. “Shut up, alright?! This is why we’re here.”

Ah, the last of the Koshugi clan…” Melchior said. “Don’t tell me you were foolish enough to bring all these people here just to beg for the life of this girl.”

Ninja Dave shook his head. “No sir, most are here to apply for membership, including Pinkie.”

Most?” Melchior replied.

Dave frowned. “I uh… sort of brought my girlfriend along without thinking…”

Becky turned to Dave. “What?! You should have said something! I didn’t want to get you in trouble!”

Elise raised her hand. “Also, I’m just married to one of the workers.”

Dave cringed. “Not helping…” he uttered to Elise.

“Hey! I just thought if you had to fess up about Becky, it was best we be honest!”

Balthazar nodded. “I do appreciate honest…” –he grinned as he slowly produced a steaming cup – “… tea?” he said with a smile before he began to giggle and snort.

Dan groaned as Pinkie began laughing. A few others in the group also chuckled and other simply stared up in confusion.

Melchior let out a heavy sigh as Caspar laughed and extended a fist to Balthazar who gave it a slight bump.

Melchior turned towards Ninja Dave. “So, you deemed it acceptable to violate the sacred secrecy of the foundation,” he partially croaked, partially hissed out.

Dave’s face went slightly pale as he swallowed.

Pinkie rose her hands. “Erm… In Ninja Dave’s defense, Helen was the one who told me about some sort of restaurant code in the first place. Omn…”

Melchior said nothing and leaned back in his chair.

Balthazar shrugged. “Well, it isn’t a very sacred secrecy.”

Caspar smiled and spoke up, “I still think we should just distribute fliers and have a big carnival to attract new members.”

Melchior groaned. “Right, because that’s how we should run our secret organization, by announcing it to everyone.”

Caspar grinned. “Haven’t you heard of hiding in plain sight?”

“Seriously!” Dan cried out. “Are you three going to argue all day!?”

“DAN!” Ninja Dave cried.

“What!?” Dan said in a protesting tone. “If Pinkie runs out of cookies while we’re here suddenly we have to fight our way out…”

Aaaahhh…” Melchior uttered. “So you sought to prolong the young girl’s final meal long enough that she might complete the tests.”

Dave winced as he turned to Melchior. “Uh… Well, I mean… the ruling there did seem somewhat vague so…”

Caspar turned to Melchior and rolled his eyes. “… And of course you’re displeased with this and wish to see the girl and our ninja associate here killed for their insolence.”

Pinkie and Ninja Dave nervously stared up at Melchior. Dan and Elise tensed.

Melchior chuckled. “On the contrary, I enjoy seeing such cleverness from our ranks…”

Dave and Pinkie both breathed sighs of relief.

Caspar’s expression went neutral as he blinked a few times. “Oh, well color me surprised.” He tapped at his chin with an index finger as he stared upwards. “Hmmm… I wonder if surprise is a real color…”

Pinkie gasped. “I like to imagine colors, too!”

Caspar smiled. “Really? How intriguing, it would be a shame if we had to kill you.”

Pinkie puffed out her lower lip and whimpered slightly.

Balthazar pointed an index finger at Dave. “Well then, if that’s settled I just have one question for you.”

Uh, yes sir?” Dave said.

“Did you bring enough cookies for us?” Balthazar asked with a smile.

“Uh… of course, sir!” Dave replied.

Dan frowned. “Hey! Those are Pinkie’s cookies! She needs them to live!”

“Dan!” Pinkie cried. “I like sharing!”

Elise cocked an eyebrow. “Even if sharing increases the chances you’ll be killed?”

Pinkie turned to Elise. “Hey, I don’t know what your experiences about not sharing are, but I know poni—ermpeople who were almost killed because they wouldn’t share! Some with pies!”

Chris’s eyes widened. “Wow, what a way to go.”

Elise looked at Dan. “She’s serious, isn’t she?”

Dan sighed. “Do you even have to ask?”

Caspar spoke up. “Death by pie is no laughing matter, miss. I mean… once you get past the hilarity of people having pies thrown at them… hehehe … or stepping in pies and slipping…. hehehe… Especially if they fall into more pies… Hahahaha… but… hehehe… but aside from that… totally… hehehehe… totally series business, pie death.”

Balthazar raised an eyebrow at Caspar. “Finished?”

Caspar nodded. “Quite.”

Balthazar turned and motioned for Dave to approach. “Step forward.”

Dave walked forward carrying the large Tupperware container full of cookies.

Dan turned to Pinkie and motioned to the men in chairs. “Is it just me, or is this whole experience even more surreal than one might expect a journey to a secret underground base of a shadowy restaurant organization might be?”

Pinkie smiled. “I like it! The council leaders seem pretty cool!”

Crunchy grinned and chimed in, “They do seem like a bunch of rockin’ dudes.”

D.H. smiled happily. “I know, right?!”

Dan sighed. “Really, it’s my fault for talking to them…” he mumbled to himself. He turned and looked into the group. “Alright, to the sensible people of the group: What the heck is going on here?!” he asked.

Gibson raised his hand. “Uh, does that include me?”

Dan narrowed his eyes. “Absolutely not.”

Gibson sighed. “Thought so.”

Dan turned to Wally. “Wally?”

Wally frowned. “Honestly, I’m not quite used to this weirdness. I think I’m the most befuddled one here.”

Dan sighed. “Sarge?”

Sarge nodded. “Sir, it would seem the council members of N.A.R.F. are indeed a bit more easygoing than we thought.”

Amber nodded in agreement. “They do seem to be good at defying expectations for leaders of a group that allow murders.”

Elise shrugged. “Eh, shadowy organizations aren’t so strictly cloak and dagger as you might think.”

Dan motioned to the three men at the top of the steps. “Dave is currently smoothing them over with cookies!”

“Hey,” Elise said in a protesting tone, “some nice, unexpected snack food can go a long way in any work environment.”

Chris frowned. “Do you think if I ask nicely, Dave will give me a cookie?”

“NO!” Dan and Elise cried out.

Balthazar suddenly spoke up as Ninja Dave descended the steps back to the group below. “WE HAVE COME TO AN AGREEMENT!” he announced as he held a cookie in one hand.

The group turned and refocused their attention on the old men above them.

Balthazar continued, “YOU MAY EXIT THE ROOM AND RETRY ANNOUNCING YOURSELVES AGAIN!”

Chris frowned. “Wait, that’s it?”

“Quiet monkey-face!” Dan cried. “This is exactly what I want!”

Chris’s eyes widened in surprise. “You stood here getting mad at them just so you could redeliver your announcement?!”

Dan furrowed his brow at Chris. “Hey! I thought really hard about what I wanted to say and how I’d deliver it! I even practiced it in the car ride over!”

“He did! He did!” Pinkie said. “Omn…”

Becky sighed. “I can totally vouch for that.”

Caspar grinned and waved the group back towards the door. “Alright, if you’re ready, please go back and try again.”

Dan looked up at the three men. “And you won’t step on my line?” he asked.

Caspar held up his palms. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Dan nodded in satisfaction and turned. “Alright minions, we’re leaving and trying again!”

The group filed out the double doors and Dan closed them behind him. After a brief pause Dan threw open the doors again. “BEWARE! THE EMPLOYEES OF WALLY’S CUPCAKE AND MUFFIN EMPORIUM ARE HERE!” Dan cried as he walked in, everyone else walking through the doors behind him.

Balthazar stood up and threw his arms up in the shape of a ‘V’. “WELCOME TO THE SECRET HEADQUARTERS OF THE NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF RESTAURANTS FOUNDATION!”

Jets of fire shot up from in front of Balthazar and a gold sign the read ‘NARF’ was lit up above the trio of men.

Pinkie began to cough as she attempted to break into a fit of laughter and eat her cookie at the same time. “Cough… cougheh… hehehehaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

Dan frowned. “Hey!” he cried in a protesting tone.

“Oh, what is it now?!” Balthazar replied.

“You guys got pyrotechnics! No fair!”

Caspar shrugged. “Sorry, but it is our headquarters! We can’t help if we’re better prepared.”

Dan scrunched his brow and lips up into a tight frown. He turned back and looked at Wally. “Did you bring any explosives with you?”

Wally shot Dan a blank stare. “Well sure. But… I mean… The kids above me have been playing their music a bit loud lately, so I was kind of saving it for the apartment that’s above mine…”

“Well too bad!” Dan cried. “I will not be upstaged!”

Omn…” Pinkie finished off the cookie she was holding and turned to Ninja Dave. “I need another cookie.”

“On it,” Dave said as retrieved another cookie from his Tupperware container.

“Dan!” Elise said in a chastising tone. “Pinkie’s going to run out of cookies at this rate! Can’t you just be happy you got to make something of an entrance?”

Dan huffed out a “Fine!

Balthazar stared down at Dan. “So, we good?”

“Yeah, yeah…” Dan sighed out.

“I mean… we’ll wait…” Balthazar said. “We literally have nothing better to do.”

Caspar spoke up. “We really don’t…”

“It’s fine, alright!” Dan said. “Let’s just get these stupid tests over with so my girlfriend can stop being targeted for death if we want to eat out.”

“Very well!” Balthazar cried. “As the leader of the group—”

Wally suddenly stepped forward. “Actually, that would be me.”

Heeeey!” Dan whined out. “I was on a roll.”

“Sorry Dan,” Wally said, “but I am the owner of the shop.”

The three men knitted their eyes slightly and leaned forward as the stared at Wally.

Hmmmm… Well this won’t do at all,” Caspar said.

Wally’s forehead began to perspire. He reached for a handkerchief and dabbed at the sweat. “Beg your pardon?”

“Sorry,” Balthazar said, “but I believe we had a good rapport with the one named Dan.”

“Yes, we will talk to the short one,” Melchior said. “The anger flows through him! It gives him strength, power! Power he will use to topple his enemies and destroy all in his path, leaving nothing but ruins and smoking husks in his wake!”

Balthazar and Caspar rolled their eyes.

“See!” Dan said as he motioned to Melchior. “The scary looking guy in the dark robe knows what’s up!”

Wally sighed and took a few steps back.

Balthazar continued, “Dan, as the leader of the group, your employees will live and die by your decisions.”

Wally sighed heavily.

“Neat!” Dan exclaimed.

“Yay!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Dan is going to take care of everyone! …Omn.

“Hurray!” D.H. cried.

“Radical!” Crunchy added.

A deep frown crossed Gibson’s face. He turned to Amber. “If I don’t make it, tell my mom to avenge me...” He paused for a second and added, “…and my brother to delete my internet browsing history.”

Amber cocked an eyebrow. “Dan’s in charge. What makes you think anyone is going to make it out alive?!”
Sarge spoke up, “I’m confident Dan can lead us all to victory.”

“You know, he’s probably right,” Chris said. “Dan’s pretty good at getting what he wants if he puts his mind to it. Also I’ve stuck with him for years and I’m still alive… physically.”

Dan turned back to Wally. “Hey, if you die, do I get the bakery?”

“Absolutely not,” Wally replied.

Dan folded his arms over his chest and grumbled irritably to himself.

Dan’s fellow employee’s expressions suddenly turned very concerned.

Becky leaned over to Elise. “Are you as relieved as I am that you’re not taking part in this?”

“Only the entire time since I’ve been here,” Elise answered.

Ninja Dave chimed in, “And I am very happy I probably won’t be killed.”

Becky smiled and threw an around Dave’s shoulders. “Me too.”

“Very well!” Balthazar cried. “If everything is settled…” Balthazar threw out his arms again.

Light spilled out in all directions revealing that the area the group occupied was quite large. Below the three members of the high council, the group of bakery employees and friends stood on a raised platform. Lower still, were a number of different separated areas full of challenges. Challenges that included cooking equipment, a room full of desks, cages that contained larger and dangerous-looking animals, and even a lengthy obstacle course full of sharp objects, fiery pits, and even walls that appeared to close in and potentially crush someone who didn’t time their trip right.

Balthazar grinned wide his toothy smile revealing that a few teeth were missing. “…let the tests begin.”

Next Chapter: Part 14 Pinkie Vs. N.A.R.F.: Chapter 121 Pinkie Vs. N.A.R.F. Test Estimated time remaining: 18 Hours, 42 Minutes
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