Today, a significant disaster was subverted. The queen of changelings had attempted to take over Canterlot, along with her many minions... There were a surprising amount, given the last time I had checked on them. Despite all preparations and awareness due to the threat posed to us several days before, she broke through our defenses and nearly caused the end of us.

For days she worked under the guise of my niece, Cadence, in plain sight as the day for her marriage came closer. The imitation was flawless, the voice, the appearance... or was it? How could I have not seen what Twilight Sparkle had seen? Could I have noticed if I, for once, had spent time with her, instead of distancing myself at the observatory? Everything had happened just under my nose, literally, and I feel ashamed.

Another regrettable action is that I did not believe Twilight when she brought up Cadence's oddities to everypony. I denied her, and I could see the pain in her eyes as I turned a moment to look back at her before leaving. Yet, despite my student's clear sincerity, I let my vengeful emotions leave her be as a result of the recent day that I confessed to her. I... pray for her forgiveness, although I do not deserve it.

It hurts me deeply, even more, that I was unable to help my subjects this day. With the love leeched from Cadence's groom over several days, the queen used that magic against me, and beat me. My pride has likely taken the most damage out of everything that has happened. The love from one pony to another was more than the love for my subjects, and again, I am ashamed to admit such a possibility.

Furthermore, the two of them combining the love within themselves was enough to create a remarkably powerful spell to free the entire city. It was one of the strongest that I had ever seen in my long life, and I could feel its potential for something far greater, still. I originally thought that only the Elements of Harmony could stop her. How could I have been so detached to overlook the element that binds all six? Could I find the love in myself to protect the ponies of the land?

After all of the events that had transpired, it makes me wonder if I am indifferent, uncaring for all under my rule. I have always detached myself so that I could avoid the pain of losing the ponies I cherish, but how can I cherish them if I do not care? Is avoiding them the only choice to preserve my feelings, instead of connecting with them?

Yet, I come again to thinking of myself... only myself. It is selfish of me to think of everything this way. For ages I have only thought of my own interests, my own sanity. Have I lost myself in the mire of being a princess, gazing down from an untouchable pedestal? When all it takes is a shadow from behind to knock me down, how can I call myself a leader?

At this night, I wonder, in all seriousness, if I truly am fit to rule Equestria.