Thank god that I’m actually taking a look at a GOOD story for a change. I need the break from the shit I’ve read.

Today’s story is called In Loving Memory and deals with the death of one of my favorite ponies, Derpy Hooves. And my god, is this a well written story. I’m actually looking FORWARD to this.

So why am I still wasting time? Here’s In Loving Memory.

        Dinky Hooves: Come on twow! I know you have SOMEpony!

        twow: I do not!

        Dinky: Your mouth says no, but your eyes say yes.

        twow: Why are you so pent up on this subject?

        Dinky: Everypony should have a special somepony!

        twow: Maybe so Dinky, but I’m a human, remember?

        Dinky: So? Don’t some of your other human friends have special someponies?

        twow: Well, Atlas does...I know someone else does as well...

        Dinky: So why not?

        twow: Alright Dinky. I have had an...attraction to a pony here.

        Dinky: Really? Who?

        twow: Well...

        Pinkie: (from TV)Is it me?

        twow: MOTHER- no Pinkie. It’s not you.

        Pinkie: Aww...but that’s okay!

        twow: Mood whiplash much? Anyway, what’s up Pinkie?

        (The lab doors slam shut and lock)

        twow: WHY do I always ask?

        Dinky: Oh, you’re doing a riff again? Alrighty, grow me up!

twow: You seem a bit too okay with the fact that I’ve messed up your age chromosomes.

        Dinky: Well, we get to have fun, right? Do we have fun?

        twow: Sometimes. Alright, I’ll see you in a little bit. (snaps his fingers)

        (Dinky’s horn glows and in a flash of light, she’s grown into a teenage mare)

        twow: Alright Pinkie, what is it today?

        Pinkie: It’s a sadfic called “In Loving Memory.”

        Dinky: That doesn’t sound bad. Who’s in it?

        Pinkie: Your mother!

        Dinky: ...

        twow: Oh boy.

        *BUZZ*

        twow and Dinky: We’ve got story sign!

In Loving Memory

By Draklox

        twow: Ah, Drak.

        Dinky: You know him?

        twow: Friend of ours. Usually hits us with bad fics.

        Derpy awoke with the rising sun.

        twow: ♫It’s the ciiiiiiiircle of liiii-♫ (kicked by Dinky)

        Dinky: Wrong song.

 It had been her habit for so many years that even though she hadn’t needed to for so long, she still did. She yawned as she stretched her legs and wings, her joints making popping sounds.

        twow: Everything pops with Derpy!

        Dinky: She comes in “original” and “muffin”.

Even though she had a full nights sleep, she was still very tired. The doctor had told her it came with getting into her twilight years. But today was a special day. Dinky was coming into town and had some great news.

        Dinky: “I lost my virginity!”

        twow: Damn Dinky.

She didn’t know what the news was yet, but for her daughter to come all the way from Canterlot so it had to be something special.

        As Derpy slowly walked down the hall towards the kitchen, she passed tokens of a long and successful life.

        twow: “That was when I destroyed Town Hall...”

        Dinky: “That one was from Nightmare Night...”

 Hung on the wall was a picture of her and her daughter, taken moments after Dinky’s birth; a plaque she received when she retired, denoting thirty years of service with the Equestrian Postal Service

        Dinky: Now that’s dedication.

        twow: Impressive.

; a picture of her daughter graduating Canterlot College For Advanced Magical Studies;

        Dinky: Yup. That’s me.

        twow: You got a long way to go.

 a copy of her commendation for bravery for helping the Ponyville weather team corral a wayward storm from the Everfree Forest. Yes, she was proud of her own accomplishments, but her true treasures were the accomplishments of her daughter.

        twow: Do tell.

        Derpy entered the kitchen and started boiling water for her morning oatmeal. While the water heated she went to her porch and retrieved the morning paper. These days she moved much slower than she had when she was younger.

        twow: That’s usually how it works.

        Dinky: Not always. Sometimes you get faster!

        twow: What are you smoking?

As she set the paper on the kitchen table, she heard her kettle whistle. She pulled a bowl from the cabinet and poured some oats into it. Then she poured a measure of hot water on top of the oats. She got a spoon from the drawer and took her breakfast to the table.

        Dinky: That’s gonna be on the test.

        twow: In THAT ORDER.

 She sat and ate her food while skimming through the paper. Nothing caught her eye so she finished and put the empty bowl in the sink, filling it with water so it would be easier to clean later. She then took the paper into the living room to browse through it more completely.

        twow: Relaxing and reading. My idea of a nice morning.

        An hour later she still had found nothing interesting to read. She stifled a yawn and went to her bookshelf to get something to read to pass the time. Once she made her selection she returned to the couch to pass the two hours till she was to meet Dinky at Sugarcube Corner.

        Dinky: Why wouldn’t I just go to her house?

        twow: Laziness?

 As she read she continued to yawn, her head slowly lowering. Slowly she drifted into a peaceful sleep. Shortly after she fell asleep her breathing and heartbeat slowed. As she napped, her body slowly shut down, drifting off into an eternal slumber.

        Dinky: (shocked) Oh...

        twow: Holy damn, that escalated quickly.

        Dinky arrived at the Ponyville train station at eleven thirty. She had to take a later train than she would have preferred, but her morning doctors appointment confirmed what she had thought. And that was the whole reason for the sudden visit to her mother.

        twow: “I got the test results back. I definitely have breast cancer.”

Normally she came to Ponyville one weekend a month to spend time with her mother, but this was special. She had just found out she was pregnant with her first foal. She couldn’t wait to tell her mother the good news. Derpy was going to be a grandmother.

        twow: Damn Dinky. Getting busy, are we?

        Dinky: (swatting at twow) Shut up!

She had taken the rest of the week off from The Canterlot Center For Advanced Magical Research just for this trip. She would have brought her husband along as well but his work was at a critical stage and he couldn’t take time off without wasting months of work.

        twow: He’s creating the pony equivalent of the atomic bomb.

        Dinky: Everything explodes into sunshine and rainbows.

 Dinky didn’t mind, she knew he would make it up to her the next weekend she came to see her mother.

        As she waited in Sugarcube Corner, Dinky glanced at the clock. Derpy was almost half an hour late. This worried Dinky, her mother was never late.

        twow: “Everyone else was just early.”

 Maybe she had lost track of time. Dinky decided to go to her mother’s house to make sure everything was ok. As she turned the corner to the street her mother lived on, she waved to her

childhood friend Apple Bloom. She was running the family apple stand today.

        Dinky: Hopefully she won’t force my dad to buy some apples this time.

        twow: (laughs)

 Apple Bloom smiled and returned the wave. Dinky continued down the street to her mother’s house.

        When she arrived, she knocked on the door. No answer. She knocked again. Still no answer.

        Dinky: Then I broke the door down.

        twow: Little extreme?

        Dinky: Not extreme enough.

 This worried her. She opened the door and walked inside. “Mom” she called out, trying to see if her mom, however unlikely, had just forgotten the time. She walked into the living room and saw her mother laying in the couch, apparently napping peacefully.

        twow: “Oops, sorry...”

        Dinky: “WAKE UP!!”

 “Hey mom, did you forget about our lunch together at Sugarcube Corner?” Dinky asked. Her mother didn’t stir from the sound of her voice. “Mom, are you ok?” she asked, confused as to why her mother continued lying there.

        twow: Because she’s tired.

        Dinky: twow!

Still no response. She lightly prodded her mother with a forehoof. Still her mother didn’t move. Then she noticed that her mother’s chest wasn’t moving. “MOM!” she yelled.

        Dinky: “Why do you go where I can’t follow?”

 And still her mother laid there. Then the situation dawned on her. A feeling of terror washed over her as she realized the horrible truth.

        Then she screamed.

        twow: Took her long enough.

        Dinky: I hate you sometimes.

        Apple Bloom was having a good day at the market. It was barely past lunch and she had sold almost all of the apples and treats she had brought. As Snails dropped the bits for the turnovers he bought onto the counter of the cart, a loud scream tore through the din of the marketplace.

        twow: “Damn it! Who let the three-headed dog out again!”

Apple Bloom immediately turned to the direction the scream came from. Her blood chilled when she saw the source of the scream. It came from Dinky’s mothers house. Losing all concern for the apples and the bits, she ran from her cart to the house the screaming was coming from.

        twow: I would have pushed the cart with me.

        Dinky: Really twow?!

        twow: What? Apples are serious business! (smacked by Dinky)

        As she entered the house, she saw Dinky sobbing and hugging her mother. Then as she looked at Derpy a flash of memory came to her. The memory of the day Granny Smith died. Derpy had the same peaceful look on her face.

        twow: You heard it here folks. Everypony will have the same peaceful look at death.

        Dinky: It’ll make the pictures easier to take.

 Apple Bloom rushed over and grabbed the sobbing Dinky in her forelegs and held her in a tight embrace, tears from the day her grandmother died rising to her eyes.

        twow: Where did they rise from?

        Dinky: Her soul.

        twow: Impressive.

        Rainbow Dash was resting on a cloud, her exercise routine taking a lot out of her. Though she had gotten older, she refused to slow down any more than she had to. She was in top shape for a mare her age.

        Dinky: Well, that’s Rainbow Dash for you.

        twow: I’m proud.

 And she aimed to keep it that way. As she dozed, she heard a scream of terror. Immediately she was in flight, zooming towards the sound. Then she realized where the scream was coming from. It was her friend Derpy’s house.

        twow: Wasn’t that already established?

        Dinky: A few more times hammered into our brains won’t kill us.

 “What the hay?” Dash thought. She came in for a harder landing than she normally would have.

        Dinky: Snapping her spine in the process.

        twow: (shudders)

The door was standing wide open, so she rushed inside.

        The scene in front of her sent a chill down her spine. Dinky and Apple Bloom sat locked in a tight embrace, both crying. And on the couch lay Derpy, appearing to be peacefully asleep. But Dash could see the awful truth. Something was seriously wrong with Derpy.

        twow: Besides the obvious fact that she’s dead?

        Dinky: She’s older, she’s gonna need a few minutes.

 Apple Bloom saw Dash out of the side of her blurry eye and yelled to the pegasus “Get help!”. Dash did the only thing she knew how to do in this type of situation. She bolted for the door and took flight, as fast as she could at her age, straight for Ponyville Hospital.

Dinky: And Apple Bloom didn’t go do that, why?

twow: The tears would have tripped her over.

        When she arrived, she was out of breath. Her heart was hammering away in her chest so hard she feared it would give out under the strain. The young nurse at the counter looked at Dash with concern. She had never seen the pegasus push herself so hard.

        twow: She wasn’t there during the three times she performed a Sonic Rainboom.

 “What’s wrong, Rainbow Dash?” asked the nurse. “You look like you’re going to have a heart attack!”

        “Quick, I need a doctor to get to Derpy Hooves’ house right now!” Rainbow yelled.

        “What’s going on?” the nurse asked again.

        “Something is terribly wrong with her.” Dash explained

        twow: “She’s dead and we can’t figure that out!”

        Dinky: “We need a firefighter STAT!”

        At that moment a unicorn doctor came into the lobby. “What’s wrong with who?” the doctor asked

        “It’s Derpy, I think she’s badly sick.” Dash replied.

        “Where is she?” the doctor inquired.

        “Her house.” Dash said.

        twow: Guess his hearing aid didn’t pick that up.

        Dinky: Or the author needed more words.

        “I’ll teleport there right now. You stay here and rest. I wouldn’t want you to become a patient from overexertion.” the doctor said and teleported out of the hospital.

        The nurse led Dash to a waiting room and gave her a glass of water. Rainbow sat in a chair and silently hoped her friend would be ok, but a part of her knew the sad truth.

        twow: Why didn’t he teleport her as well?

        Dinky: Hell if I know.

        The doctor arrived to a terrible scene.

        Dinky: There was blood EVERYWHERE!

        twow: AHHHHHHHHHH!

 Two mares sat on the floor, holding each other and crying. A third older mare lay apparently sleeping on the couch next to them. He subtly used his magic to scan the older mare, and gasped as his worst fears were confirmed.

        twow: “Yup. That’s breast cancer.”

        Dinky: “Damn it!”

 The mare had passed away over an hour ago. The sound of his gasp alerted the younger mares to his presence. The earth pony looked at him with knowing eyes, but the unicorn had a pleading look. Softly, he simply said “I’m terribly sorry for your loss.” The unicorn broke down, harder than before, sobbing uncontrollably.

        Dinky: How did I break down even HARDER?

        twow: With effort.

        As soon as he found out, Dinkys husband dropped everything and took the next train to Ponyville. Months of research would be lost, but he didn’t care. He had to be there for his wife. When he arrived, his wife was still crying.

        twow: Holy damn. How did you not dehydrate and pass out?

        Dinky: I took crying breaks.

        twow: Seems legit.

 He took her in his forelegs and held her tightly. He had never seen her like this, but he also knew how close she was to her mother. He could tell her whole world was falling apart. All he could do for her was be there and provide emotional support.

        Dinky: And sexua-

        twow: How about you just stop yourself?

        The next three days were the closest thing to Tartrus for Dinky. All the arrangements for her mothers funeral had to be made.

        twow: “It was quite the trial.”

        Dinky: “Many lives were lost.”

It would have been impossible for her if not for her friends and her husband. Scootaloo had flown in from Cloudsdale, and as captain of the Wonderbolts, she had called off all training for the duration of her trip.

        twow: That easily? Damn.

        Dinky: I guess somepony was on hoof to fill in.

Sweetie Belle had came in from Manehatten, canceling several performances to be there for her friend. They, as well as Apple Bloom, Ruby Pinch, and her husband, had not left her side since they had arrived. If not for them, Dinky would have had a complete emotional breakdown.

        Dinky: Besides the fact that I already did?

        The day of the funeral was sunny and warm. Rainbow Dash had called in a favor with the weather team. As the ponies attending took their seats, Dinky smiled for the first time since her mother died. Her mother had made many friends, and it seemed all of them had made time for her.

        twow: Hell yeah! Derpy’s one of the most loved ponies in Ponyville!

        Dinky: Really? That’s great.

In the front row across from her were the Elements of Harmony. Even Princess Twilight Sparkle had chosen to be here. In the row with her were all her Ponyville friends. Behind her seemed to be half the ponies in Ponyville. It warmed her heart that so many ponies cared about her mother.

        Dinky: When one mare delivers the mail for so long, I’m sure that’ll be the case.

        twow: I need to become a mailman now.

        As Sweetie Belle finished singing the song she had written for Derpy’s funeral, she took a seat next to Dinky. Then the princess took the stage and began to speak. “Today, we lay to rest a pony that exemplifies all the traits that we all strive to achieve.

        twow: “In fact, she taught me all I know.”

        Dinky: “The muffins were the best part of the lessons.”

 A loving mother that gave everything to see to it her daughter had the best chance for a good life. A loyal friend, there to help any pony that was in need. A hard worker, who always gave her all at any task. Many ponies knew her. More knew of her.

        twow: And all loved her.

        Dinky: (sniffs)

        twow: You alright there?

        Dinky: Keep going.

 And though she made some mistakes in her life, those are overshadowed by the good she did.” The princess restrained a small sob. “Many came from all over Equestria to pay their respects to Derpy Hooves. So let us begin.” And with that she stepped down to allow the next speaker.

        Dinky: The next speaker was Snowflake.

        twow: “YEAH!”

        Dinky: “Alright, who’s next?”

        Pinkie Pie made her way to the podium. It was apparent she had been crying. Composing herself, she began. “I remember the first time I met Derpy, I had just moved to Ponyville. It was my first day working at Sugarcube Corner. She came in at lunch time and ordered a blueberry muffin.

        twow: That’s our Derpy.

 After that, she came in everyday and ordered a muffin. She was the first friend I made here. I even made a habit of starting the muffins at the same time every day so they would be as fresh as they could be when she came in. Then, one day, she didn’t come in for her muffin.

        Dinky: (gasps)

        twow: STOP THE PRESSES!!

Several days went by without her stopping in. I soon learned from the Cakes that they had cut back hours at the post office and she couldn’t afford her daily muffins. She was spending all her bits to make sure her daughter had enough food. She was going days without food.” Pinkie sniffled at the memory.

        twow: Wait, so she was eating nothing at ALL?!

        Dinky: How did she keep up her strength?

        twow: I really got nothing.

        “So, I started dropping off a basket of muffins at her house every day. I tried to pay the Cakes for the muffins, but they wouldn’t let me. When Derpy found out, she tried to pay for all the muffins when her hours picked back up, but I flat out refused.

        twow: “Please can I pay you?”

        Dinky: “Your bits are no good here!”

Any pony that would sacrifice her own comfort and wellbeing for their child deserves nothing less.” With a choked sob, Pinkie left the podium.

        The next pony to speak was Rarity. She looked composed but Dinky could tell she was as sad as anypony else.

        twow: Only Rarity could pull that off.

 “Derpy was a bastion of generosity I only could hope to approach. When her daughter's senior prom was approaching, she came to me to commision for a dress for Dinky. She offered to model for me in exchange for the dress, due to her shortage of bits to pay for it. Naturally I took her offer, a live model works so much better than a mannequin.  

        Dinky: Is that true?

twow: Oh yeah. You can get a live model to show off how it’ll look if you walk and stuff.

Then one day she fell asleep waiting for me to retrieve the next outfit I wanted her to try on. When she realized she had fell asleep, she apologized profusely. I let her go home, but decided to look into it further.

        twow: She’s 005.

        Dinky: Fashionista by day, spy by night.

         It was then I found she had been moonlighting as a part time delivery pony for a local restaurant at night to earn extra bits to pay for her daughters prom.

        Dinky: Ya know, Mom isn’t really that short on money.

        twow: In fact, some of my inventions have helped bring in more.

She was putting in so many hours she was not getting enough sleep. The next day, I told her we were even for the dress, and to go home and get some sleep. I contacted my friends and arranged some rather hefty discounts for Dinky, so her prom would be most memorable, and her mother would be rested enough to attend as well.

        twow: And nopony caught on. Nice job guys.        

        Dinky: Oh I can’t wait for my prom!

 Of all the things that can be said about Derpy, she was an exemplary mother who would go to any length to make her daughter happy.” Rarity concluded her speech and stepped down.

        Next up was Rainbow Dash. Out of the previous speakers, she was closest to Derpy. “Derpy was the most loyal pony I ever had the pleasure of knowing.

        twow: “In fact, why the hell am I the Element of Loyalty?”

        Dinky: “I think Celestia got the wrong pony.”

She made mistakes, but we all do at some point. I still remember the city hall incident. I was mad at first, until I found out that she was a little ditsy from lack of sleep.

        Dinky: Actually, that’s true.

        twow: I can believe that.

She had just hired a tutor to help Dinky learn magic, since she couldn't help her learn. And to pay for it she had taken a second full time job.  Me and the rest of the weather team took up a collection, after Apple Jack returned from the rodeo, to pay for the damage, so Derpy wouldn’t have to.

        Dinky: What is it with the theme that my mom is broke?!

        twow: Idk. Plot device?

 It would have devastated her if she had to. From that day forward if she got called on for weather duty, I gave her the easiest jobs I could find.

        Then came the day of the Everfree storm. I had seen it brewing for a few days, but it looked like it was going to head out to sea.

        twow: But it forgot a boat.

 Then it turned toward Ponyville. I knew there was no way I could handle it on my own. I called upon every Pegasus I could find to help break it up before it devastated the town. We all attacked the storm, but most were quickly overwhelmed, and soon it was only me and Derpy still in flight.

        twow: Holy damn. That’s impressive.

        Dinky: That’s my mom.

We pushed ourselves to the breaking point, and we were just barely able to break it up before it got to Ponyville. We both received commendations from the mayor for our actions day, but her’s was more deserved than mine. I was the head of the weather team, she was only a postal pony, with no formal weather training. Yet she pushed herself to the breaking point to save the town.

        twow: I thought it was just “fly really fast.”

        Dinky: Eh. Weather training is gonna be different then postal training.

That was the kind of mare Derpy was. Even after Dinkys father passed away soon after she was born, she never gave up. Even having to raise a foal by herself, she never gave up. And now we must all remember, no matter what life gives you, never give up.” With tears in her eyes, Rainbow Dash stepped down.

        Dinky: My dad died in this?

        twow: He must have ran out of regenerations.

        Many other speakers shared memories and stories of Derpy's exceptional life. When all had said their piece about her, six stallions carried the coffin that contained her worldly remains to their final resting place. As the casket was lowered into the grave, Dinky broke down again.

        twow: She was only in pieces at this point.

        Dinky: Gives a new meaning to R.I.P.

 All the sacrifices her mother had made to see to it she had the best life possible, all the effort to give her the life her mother never had the chance to live, was more than the unicorn could handle. And as the casket reached the bottom of the grave, she tossed in a hooffull of dirt.

        twow: “I have a dream, that one day you’ll take a shower!”

        Dinky: “This dirt is a reminder!”

 Through her tear filled eyes, she could only make out the first three words on her mother's gravestone.

        In Loving Memory.

        Dinky: And she will be remembered.

        twow: Damn straight. Let’s head out.

        twow: Damn...

        Dinky: That...was a good story. A really good story.

        twow: I mean, it takes the death of a character and just runs with it.

        Dinky: And even better, it doesn’t have tentacles or rape or anything like that!

        twow: Yeah. A peaceful death, and a damn great story.

        Pinkie: I’m glad you liked it T. You deserved a good one.

        twow: Well, that’s Pinkie.

        (The lab doors unlock and open.)

        twow: Oops, hold up. (snaps fingers, causing Dinky to revert to her filly form)

        Dinky: That was fun. Now twow, you didn’t answer my question!

        twow: Come again?

        Dinky: Who’s your special somepony?

        twow: Alright. It’s Fluttershy.

        Dinky: Really?!

        twow: Yeah, we kinda admitted it during a riff.

        Dinky: (hugs twow) I’m so happy for you!

        twow: Thanks Dinky.

        Dinky: (gasps) I gotta go tell everypony!

        twow: Dinky, wait!

        (Dinky runs out the lab doors)

        twow: Shit. I’ll catch you later Pinkie!

        Pinkie: Alright T! Better go catch her!

(twow zaps himself to look like a pony, running out the door as the TV turns off with a blip)