Author's note: So we've Chuck and Pinkie's Hearthswarming that's going quite crazy, but who else is having a holiday most hazy? Let's talk of this pony, Mr. Quibble Pants, who's finding out his Hearthswarming ain't the same song-and-dance. What can we expect from this book reading fellow? Just keep reading, and... something something... Yellow. I tried to rhyme this author's note, but sometimes that ship is a hard one to float, something I should share for this chapter ahead, the action is being seen from within Quibble's head. Now let's get to the story and read what unfurls, maybe there will even be something that... swirls.

---

A Quibbling Hearthswarming

December 23rd. Ponyville.

I walked through Ponyville this morning, I don't normally take morning walks, but I thought it would be a good idea. I soon regretted the idea when I saw that everypony had busied themselves with Hearthswarming activities, wait, that makes me sound like a real Snowfall Frost, let me make something clear, I love Hearthswarming, wonderful time of year! The thing was, this year was a bit different, you see, every year I spent Hearthswarming with my Mom and Dad, but this was my first Hearthswarming away from home, and as much as everything looked similar, it was so, so different.

Me: The streets are filled with Hearthswarming cheer

At least its only once a year

Perfect parcels tied with perfect bows

And carols ringing in my ear

Bundled up against the cold

Lines wherever gifts are sold

Each shop window displays a Hearthswarming scene

For everypony young and old

Icicles on eavesdrops

And tinsel on the trees

But it's a green Hearthswarming for me

Couples skating on the pond

Making angels on the lawn

Five red mittens drying on the rack

And needles shedding tannenbaums

Red bows on the railings

And snowflakes on the ground

But it's a green Hearthswarming in this town

Green

Cause of everything I miss

All this mistletoe no kiss

And with every Hearthswarming wish

There would be no greater gift

Than to have this envy lift...

I retired to my house after walking through town, after settling into my chair with some hot cocoa, I heard a sound coming from outside my door.

Carolers are at my door... I slammed the door shut.

Don't want to hear them anymore

Stockings on the mantle

It snows here everyday

But it's a green Hearthswarming anyway

Red nose on the reindeer

And tinsel on the tree

But it's a green Hearthswarming for me

So anyway, that was how I felt. Kind of alone in the world, Chuck had been drug off with Pinkie to visit her family for Heathswarming, and Rainbow Dash was visiting her family as well. Hearthswarming was Cheese's busiest time of the year, I was half convinced he was Santa Hooves. The guy disappears from the 23rd to the 26th pretty much every year, which doesn't normally bug me, but somepony's company would be great. I'd even take Discord at this point, wait, no. I take that back. Not Discord, anypony but Discord. Suddenly, I heard a knock at my door. I walked to my door and opened it up.

"Quibble Pants?" The gray mailmare asked. I had to take a minute to pick an eye to make contact with.

"Yes, that's me." I nodded. She reached into her bag and gave me a letter.

"Letter for you!" She said cheerfully. "Happy Hearthswarming!"

"Likewise." I nodded. "Thanks for the letter." I said shutting the door.

"Quibble Pants... 539 Croup Lane... From: Grouchy and Bossy Pants." I read, it was a letter from Mom and Dad! I opened the letter and read.

"Dear Quibble, I hope all is well in... Where do you live again? Ponytown or something? Anyway, we just wanted to wish you a happy Hearthswarming. With love from Mom and Dad." I read. That was definitely my Dad's writing. Formal writing was never his forte, the sentiment was still kind. I was glad to hear from my parents. Suddenly, I had an idea. A great idea, I immediately went to my room and packed a bag.

---

One train ride later...

I never realized how bad the air smelled in Manehatten until I started living in a small town. Wow, there is a gigantic difference between the air in Ponyville and in Manehatten. But really, none of that mattered much, I was happy to be back in my home town. I hopped in the first taxi cart I could find and went straight for my parent's house.

---

Meanwhile at the Quibble family home

"Geez this tree smells good." Grouchy, my Dad remarked. "Smells so real!"

"Real trees have a tendency to do that." My Mom, Bossy replied sarcastically. "I'm glad we're trying something new this year." She said.

"Me too. About time for a change." My dad nodded.

---

My arrival

Everything was just as I remembered in my old neighborhood, the old tree in my backyard with my tree house where I used to hang out and read comics was still standing, my neighbor's lawn still cluttered with terrible tacky lawn ornaments, the gutter on the roof was still broken from a roofing accident from 6 years ago. Thousands of memories flooded back as I approached the steps of my old house. I knocked on the door as I stepped onto the "Welcome" mat. My mother came to the door.

"Quibble!?" She asked feeling surprised to see me.

"Hi Mom!" I smiled.

"Oh Quibble!" She wrapped me in a tight hug. "It's so good to see you! Grouchy! Get over here!" She called to my dad.

"Quibble! Son! Good to see you lad!" He said embracing me. "What the heck are you doing here?" He asked.

"Sorry about the sudden drop in." I said. "Just missed home I guess, wanted to have a good old fashioned Hearthswarming at home." As I said that I couldn't help but notice them exchange looks.

"Ah. Well then. You've come to the right place!" Mom smiled.

"Yep! C'mon in son, your room should just how you left it." Dad nodded. And he was right, when I opened the door to my room, it was like I never went off to college. Or the ten years after that didn't happen for that matter. Comics were still stacked high, my old Power Ponies collectibles were on the shelf, and even my old Mareilyn Monroe poster was up.

"Wow... Really is like I never left." I said to myself picking up a comic. I remembered this one! First appearance of Spider Colt! I wasn't around when this was printed, I traded a pack of gum for it from a colt who stole it from his older brother, guess neither of them knew it'd be worth something someday. I couldn't help myself but to revisit the old piece of childhood memorabilia. The dialogue was tacky and the illustrations were crude in comparison to the comics of the modern day, but there's always room to appreciate the classics. Before long, half of one of the stacks had been cleared and re-read after sitting dormant for the past decade. I looked at the clock, a whole hour had passed since I got here. I decided I'd better go back downstairs.

"There he is!" My dad said. "Beginning to think you had a mare up there with you!"

"Speaking of which, grandfoals would be appreciated." My mom added.

"I'm not discussing this!" I groaned. I turned and looked at the Hearthswarming tree, I didn't get to look when I came in. Suddenly I noticed something was wrong, definitely wrong.

"Whoa! Whoa!" I gasped. "What are you doing here!?" I exclaimed.

"Building a haunted house for Nightmare Night." Mom said sarcastically.

"Where's our real tree!?" I asked.

"This is real." My dad said going up to it. "Give it a sniff!"

"I mean our old one!" You see, ever since I was a young colt, we put up a silver aluminum tree, lights came preattached so there was no stress of untangling lights every year, no needles on the floor, easy to tuck away, it was perfect!

"That aluminum thing? I got tired of it." Mom told me. "We're going to have a traditional Hearthswarming for once this year." This is ludicrous.

"Tradition!? That's been our tree for more than 20 years, if that isn't tradition I don't know what is!" I blurted.

"Hearthswarming predates Saturday Morning Cartoons you know." Mom gave me a look.

"I know, it goes all the way back to Jimmy Stifle." I said remembering his old Hearthswarming specials. "Why are you trying to wreck Hearthswarming? That's Dad's thing!" I said.

"I never wrecked Hearthswarming!" He said grouchily.

Hearthswarming Eve, Age: 7

"Careful, those knives are sharp." My mom warned dad as he was about to carve the meal.

"Don't worry!" He brushed her off.

-ambulance-

One year later

"This eggnog seems a little off." Mom said.

"Just drink it!" Dad scoffed.

-ambulance-

One year after that

"Careful, remember what happened a couple of years ago." Mom warned Dad as he was about to carve the meal again.

"You're right..." He nodded. "Here Quibble!" He gave me the knives.

-ambulance-

Back to the present

"Good times." My mom said sarcastically to my Dad.

"this new tree doesn't sit well with me at all." I sneered at it. "You two can have your traditional Hearthswarming but don't expect me to participate... I mean I'll open the presents, and eat the big dinner... Have a couple pieces of pie and all, but my heart will be in the basement with a certain forgotten piece of aluminum!"

"Pretty high and mighty for a colt who can't even handle a knife!" Dad scoffed at me.

---

Later on

I decided to go for a short walk to clear my head, my second walk in the same day, I thought the health kick was meant for after New Years! I was walking through my old neighborhood, the familiarity was nice, especially after the heart attack from my mother's crazy Hearthswarmings plan. I come all the way from Ponyville for familiarity and this happens!? Maybe they should've brought it up in the letter, no maybe about it! They absolutely should have! I know I sounded kind of selfish, but I didn't think it was too much to ask for. All of a sudden I heard a voice calling for me.

"Quibble? Quibble Pants? Is that you!?" I turned and saw a stallion approaching me. I squinted for a second but suddenly I recognized my foalhood best friend, Penny Candy.

"Penny Candy! I can't believe it!" I said running up to him.

"What're you doing back here? I thought you moved deep city!" He said.

"I did." I explained. "Then I moved to a small town, Ponyville. Thought I'd come back and visit the old neighborhood for Hearthswarming."

"Well I'm glad I ran into you then, I was just on my way into town for an early dinner, care to join me?" He asked.

"Sure!" I nodded. Once we got into town we dropped into the first pub we could find. After we sat down and got our meals we started to catch up, and did we have a lot to catch up on! It had been at least five years since I last saw him.

"So what have you been up to?" I asked.

"Took over my dad's candy shop." He told me. "Of course that was kind of a given." His dad's candy shop, let me tell you this, his dad's candy shop was probably the best place to go as a young colt. He had every type of candy known to pony kind, stools you could just sit at like a bar and eat candy till your heart was beating faster than a caffeine infused hummingbird. The best part was, Penny Candy and I got discounts, on account of being the owner's son and the owner's son's best friend.

"Really? Wait, your dad didn't..." I started.

"Die? No, no he's alive and well." Penny reassured me. "He just decided to retire, that's all. I couldn't stand the idea of that shop going to some other business, so I took over, still doing strong too, as long as foals love candy I'd say I'll do fine." He explained. "What about you?"

"Well, let's see, since we've past seen each other... I've only..." I smirked a little. "Met the real Daring Do."

"You're kidding." He said. "Everypony knows Daring Do is made up."

"I'm not kidding, here, let me tell you about it." I proceeded to tell him the story of when I met Rainbow Dash at that Daring Do convention. His eyes were buldged and his jaw hung by the time I was done.

"Dude!" He remarked.

"I know." I grinned.

"That sounds almost like the crazy adventures we'd plan out back when we were little colts!" He said.

"I know!" I nodded. "Come to think of it, I think I still have a map we drew up somewhere in my closet!"

"Oh Celestia..." He said thinking back upon our foalhood.

"But I mean, that can wait." I said. "What else has been new?" I asked.

"Well, remember Sugar Cane from school?" He asked.

"Yeah, what about her?" I asked. He suddenly pulled out a golden ring."You two got married!?"

"Not yet exactly, we're to be married." He said. "We started dating about two years ago, would have told you but you were never around."

"Congratulations!" I smiled. "Happy for you two!"

"Why don't you come back for the wedding? I'm sure she'd be happy to see you too." Penny told me.

"I'd love too!" I said.

"Great, I'll have your invitation with the details sent soon once we decide on a date." He told me.

"Wonderful!" I said.

"How about you?" He asked.

"What?"

"Any mares? or colts, you know I don't judge." He asked.

"Why does everypony add the second part? Is it the shirt? The mane?" I sighed. "Nope, not really though." I said.

"Not a single one? Pants, I'm telling you, you don't know what you're missing." He said.

"You don't think I know that?" I asked. "I've tried, just no luck yet. But, there's this one mare..." I started.

"Oh? C'mon, tell me more!" He pleaded.

"Well she's the one I met at the convention." I explained. "She just so happened to live in the town I moved to."

"It's fate!" Penny exclaimed. "You can't just write this stuff!" (Yes, yes you can).

"She's great." I explained. "Gives me a kick in the flank when I need it too."

"Glad to know somepony took up that job, Celestia knows you've needed it for a long time coming." Penny joked.

"Hey!" I blurted before nodding a little. "Yeah, seems more small town ponies are more apt to give you a kick in the flank when you need it, not only do I've got her, but her friend too, she's always hanging around this apple farmer pony, apparently her big shtick is honesty, then the bar keep in town, don't get me started, once, he pretty much locked me up in the bar with a cracked draconequus." (See chapter 14).

"Wow, why'd you even move there?" He asked.

"Well, I dunno, the sense of community was kind of nice, after all in Manehatten everypony sticks to themselves really." I said.

"That and I'm sure half of your decision was you thinking with your-"

"Shut up." I cut him off.

"Well, anyhow, we'd probably best head back now, well, I'd better anyway." He said getting up.

"Already?" I asked.

"Yeah, that's 'to be married' life for you, she wants us to go visit her parents tonight."

"Ah well yeah I get it, best not keep her then." I said getting up with him. "Tell her I said 'hi'."

"I sure will." He nodded. "Great seeing you again pal, hope to see you again before you leave!"

"Likewise." I nodded.

---

Back home

"Try this." My mom said with a pot and wooden spoon. I took the wooden spoon and almost put it in my mouth until she said. "Homemade cranberry sauce." I looked at her with a cocked eyebrow.

"Homemade cranberries?" I asked. "What kind of food network voodoo is that?" She just looked at me blankly.

"Cranberry sauce comes from a tin! That's the way it's always been!" I explained. "Don't you miss the traditional cranking open of the can? That warm giggly cylinder sliding out onto the plate? That 'blurt' sound? That's the sound of Hearthswarming!"

"Right now the sound of Hearthswarming is you whining." She said dryly. "Let me plug that whiny mouth of yours with some food, dinner time." She said. Now, I may not like this new kick my mom is on, but hearing this news pleased me greatly, I missed home meals for a long time now.

"Thank Celestia!" I said running up to the table.

"Made one of your favorite's since your home, a five cheese lasagna." She said.

"Great!" I stopped. "You didn't use one of the cheeses twice did you?" I asked.

"Five different cheeses." She smiled.

"You know those cheeses are bad for my arteries!" My dad said.

"I've seen those disgusting sandwiches you make yourself, you shouldn't be that worried." She replied. "Now let's dig in." As we dug into our food, my glance couldn't help but catch the tree, it standing there, all, real, all... nontraditional yet traditional.

"I still can't believe that you aren't using the old tree, the old tree was tradition." I said.

"Before artificial trees the tradition was non artificial trees." Mom said.

"Yeah, we used to call 'em 'trees'." Dad nodded.

"Well at least the old stand-by didn't get pine needles all over the floor and ooze pine gum." I said.

"We don't mind, it's Hearthswarming ooze." She said.

"Well it stinks." I said. "Not the tree actually it smells quite nice, but the rest of this stinks."

"Don't be such a crap apple." My mom dismissed me.

"I'm just glad I'm not the one wrecking Hearthswarming..." My dad said quietly.

"Give it time..." Mom said.

"Well, thanks for dinner Ma." I said finishing my lasagna. "Need any help with the dishes?" I asked.

"That's what your fathers for." She said.

"What!?" Dad blurted out.

"Alright, thanks again Ma!" I said retreating upstairs.

"Come on old bones, let's get these dishes done." Mom said as Dad grouchily got up and cleared the table.

"I thought the purpose of having a son was getting him to do all the work." He grumbled.

"That was when he was a colt, you realize he has grown since then right?" Mom asked.

"Physically, sure, gets fatter every year." He said.

"Oh hush." Mom ordered as they started doing the dishes. He did as he was told for a short while, then he eventually broke those orders.

"Boy, Quibble is really wrecking Hearthswarming this year huh?" He asked.

"Did you water the tree?" Mom asked, but he wasn't listening.

"Normally you'd think it'd be me wrecking Hearthswarming, but it's him." He continued.

"And the cranberry sauce needs to go in the jars I left out." Mom said ignoring him.

"Yep, he is really on the way to wrecking Hearthswarming." He nodded

"More like his father every day." Mom said.

"Yep." He nodded, then he realized what he agreed to. "Hey! I'm on your side here!"

---

The next day

I was eating breakfast with Mom when Dad walked in from going out into town, cranky as ever.

"Well there he is, the colt who's wrecking Hearthswarming." He said looking at me.

"Did you pick up the ingredients for the pot pie?" Mom asked.

"Too busy doing other stuff, I'll get it later." He said.

"Tis the season of miracles." Mom muttered. I looked over at the tree and saw it starting to look shriveled.

"Geez, your tree isn't looking too good, you know there's a nice shiny silver one downstairs I could bring up." I suggested.

"Didn't you water it?" Mom asked my dad.

"I had a lot on my mind!" He defended himself.

"Doesn't take much." She sneered. "Now go get those ingredients before I stuff you full of bread." She said.

"Geez." I heard him mutter. "Is it just me, or is your mother wrecking Hearthswarming?" He asked.

"No, it's just you." I grinned.

"Jackass." He muttered.

"Alright alright Dad." I siad getting up. "Tell you what, I'll go get those things." I offered.

"Finally you're speaking my language!" He said reclining. I chuckled a little as I walked out the door with the list.

I arrived at the supermarket to pick out the ingredients, it wasn't too hard, they always stock up more on the big ticket food items around Hearthswarming. As I was shopping, I heard somepony else almost frantically reciting a list.

"Okay... eggs check, potatoes... potatoes..." She said, she was a pink mare with red thick glasses.

"Left dinner for last minute huh?" I asked.

"Heh! Sure did, I guess I just got so busy I almost forgot what day it was." She chuckled.

"That's what my old colt did, now I'm out shopping for him." I said.

"Aww how kind! Warms my heart to see ponies being nice, especially this time of year!" She smiled widely.

"Sweet." I said. "See, my parent's names are Bossy and Grouchy, so there's definitely a whole lot of that around the holidays."

"Ha!" She laughed, then she looked at me. "Oh, you're not kidding."

"Not kidding at all." I shook my head. "Name's Quibble Pants." I extended my hoof.

"I'm Oddity." She smiled. "Oddity Trinkets."

"Happy to meet you." I nodded.

"Likewise." She smiled. "With your family for Hearthswarming you said huh?"

"Sure am, back home for the first time since I moved." I said. "Moved to this small town, Ponyville."

"I've heard of that place." She said.

"But yeah, decided I'd come back, one of my friends I have no idea where he went off to, my other... acquaintance, I wouldn't say we're friends went with his marefriend to meet her family, then my only other friend in the area was with her family so I decided to come home." I explained. "What about you? Visiting?"

"Nope! Lived here my whole life." She said. "Just me though, parents moved down to Califoalnia for their retirement, train tickets are just a bit too pricey, maybe next year though." She shrugged.

"Sorry to hear that, I hope you get to see them next year." I said sympathetically. "If it helps, I'll let you swap places with me, I came up for a traditional Hearthswarming and got the rug thrown out from under me."

"How so?" She asked. I proceeded to explain all the ways Hearthswarming had been changed for me. As I finished she just looked at me.

"Really?" She asked.

"I know! I come up hoping just for familiarity, and this happens!" I say.

"No, no that's not what I meant." She shook her head. "I mean, really? I'm sorry but I can't quite understand why you have such a big problem with them trying something new."

"What?" I asked.

"You've got family, friends, you're home, I just don't understand why what's not there is such a big deal compared to what is there." She said. I was taken aback by what she said. I said nothing for a moment.

"Just food for thought." She said. "Anyway, Happy Hearthswarming Quibble!" She said as she left.

"Happy... Hearthswarming." I said to myself as she left. Maybe she was right, maybe I was being kind of an ass about this whole thing.

---

Getting home

"I'm back!" I said walking through the door.

"Look who it is, mister Snowfall Frost!" My dad said.

"Hush dear." Mom told him.

"I'm back with all the items." I said hauling in the groceries.

"Oh thank you Quibble." Mom said. "How much were they? I can pay in just a second, let me get my purse." She said.

"No need." I said.

"Pardon?" She asked.

"You don't need to, dinner is on me this year." I said.

"Well thank you Quibble." Mom said gathering the ingredients. "What changed your attitude?" She asked.

"Got some sense knocked into me." I shrugged.

"About damn time!" Dad called from the living room.

"Quiet Grouchy!" Mom called. "He does have a point though."

"I know, I'm sorry I was kind of a stick in the mud before." I apologized.

"We all get that, you more than others, but not as much as your father, but that will come as you get older." She said.

"Don't remind me!" I chuckled.

A few hours later we had our Hearthswarming Eve dinner, and a good time was had by all, after dinner Penny Candy and Sugar Cane even came over for a visit. It was nice to catch up with Sugar again. She used to be in mine and Penny's friend group in school so we were pretty close. As the night came to a close and things were winding down, I was saying goodbye to them at the door.

"Thanks again for dropping by!" I said.

"Of course pal!" Penny smiled. "Had to see you before you went back to Ponyville." Sugar Cane nodded. Suddenly she looked up at the decoration above the doorway.

"That sure is pretty mistletoe." She said.

"Sure is." Penny nodded.

"Yep." I said. "But it's gonna die pretty soon, I'd better take it down." I said grabbing a step ladder.

"Are you sure? Looks like a high reach." Penny said.

"I've got it!" I said stubbornly.

-ambulance-

"Same damn thing every year." My mother remarked looking at the ambulance cart go off.

---

Wasn't that fun? Don't worry, next chapter will be back to Chuck and Pinkie, I just it would be fun to show some other holiday stories.

Most of Grouchy and Bossy's dialogue and character was based off of Oscar and Emma Leroy from CBC's Corner Gas.

Song used

"Green Christmas" by: The Barenaked Ladies