Equestria's New Comedian
Chapter 24: Chapter 24: Happy Hearthswarming Part 1
Previous Chapter Next ChapterAuthor's Note: This is more a question I'm asking my readers for fun, what is your favorite movie or special to watch around the holidays? For me it would be "A Muppet Christmas Carol" for movie and for special or holiday episode of a T.V show is probably "A Hearth's Warming Tail" from season 6 of MLP. Can you tell I love "A Christmas Carol"? It's true, I'm so excited to watch "The Man Who Invented Christmas" soon, it looks like it will be really interesting. Anyway, here is the first part of the long awaited actual Hearthswarming story.
Chapter 24: Happy Hearthswarming Part 1: Meeting the family
"Good morniiiiiiiiiing!" Pinkie sang to me bursting into my room. This was a daily occurrence in my life for the past little while, and I must say, I enjoyed the ritual. I've never considered myself a morning person at all, but when Pinkie came to make sure I was awake I always felt happy, maybe it was the fact I was madly in love and anything she did made me happy. I was always awake whenever she did come in, some days I'd be up and out of bed, other days I'd be lying back staring at the ceiling. This morning was the latter.
"Good morning Cutie Pie." I said still in bed. She immediately bounced on me similar to that of a kid on Christmas morning wanting their parents to wake up.
"Come on Chuckie! It's time to get up! We've got a train to catch!" She bounced on me excitedly, today was the big day, the day I'd make a complete and utter ass of myself in front of Pinkie's family.
"The train doesn't show up until lunch time... Besides, I think I've got a fever..." This was a routine I enjoyed playing.
"Oh yeah? What kind of fever?" She asked playing along.
"I've got cuddle fever, the only cure is cuddle time." I fake pouted beneath my blankets.
"Well, alright, if you absolutely insist it's the only cure..." She said in a fake hesitant way before snuggling in next to me. I wrapped my front legs around her and held her close. feeling her warm breath against my neck and feeling her nuzzle her face against mine.
"Remind me why we can't just cuddle all day every day." I said holding her close.
"I honestly don't know." She said.
"Write your folks, tell them you've got a fever of 109 or something so we can just stay here like this for the next few days." I joked. She gigged and bopped me on the muzzle.
"Fat chance mister." She smiled. I smiled back at her.
"Fine, fine. But the moment we get back, nopony sees us until New Year's Eve." I bargained.
"Deal." She gave me a kiss. I kissed her back and smiled at her.
"Honestly, you have like, the most beautiful eyes, I'm not even kidding." I said.
"Wow, so poetic." She smirked.
"I just woke up, cut me some slack." I smirked back.
"I guess I can let it slide, just this once though." She winked kissing my forehead.
"I knew you'd understand." I smiled kissing her forehead back.
"Let me know when we have to go." She said snuggling into me.
"Trusting me with that job, not wise, but I'll do my best." I smiled holding her close to me and nestling my face into her mane, her mane doubled as the world's most comfortable pillow. I wasn't quite sure if she was asleep or not, neither of us said anything, we just soaked in the moment. It's moments like this that make all the hardships in life worthwhile. Those moments where you stop and forget all your anxieties and fears, anything bad going on ceases to exist and it's just you and the one you love.
"I love you." She whispered to me.
"I love you too... So much." I hugged her tightly. "I don't know what I would have done without you."
"Aww... Chuckie..." She smiled at me.
"I mean it. Pinkie, you mean so much to me."
"You mean a lot to me too Chuckie." She kissed me tenderly. I kissed her back and ran my hoof through her mane and tickled her neck, she started giggling and wriggled around.
"Stop it!" She giggled.
"Make me." I grinned tickling her.
"That's it!" She exclaimed and started tickling me back. "Tickle fight!" We bounced around tickling each other until I fell out of bed and hit the floor with Pinkie tumbling on top of me. We both laughed together on the floor. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Mrs. Cake walked in.
"I'm not interrupting anything am I?" She asked.
"No no, nothing at all." I said standing up.
"Good morning Mrs. Cake!" Pinkie smiled getting up.
"Good morning Pinkie, good morning to you too Chuck." She smiled at us.
"Good morning." I smiled back at her.
"I just wanted to give you two your Hearthswarming presents now since you won't be here for the day itself." She told us reaching for a pair of bags.
"Oh that's so thoughtful, you didn't have to do that." I said to her.
"Oh nonsense, Pinkie is like our own family, and I've seen how well you treat her and how much you two love each other. I just thought I'd let you know I think you're every bit a part of the family as Pinkie is." She said giving me the bag.
"Thank you so much." I smiled getting a little teary eyed, I'm not used to this kind of acceptance so this was quite unexpected. I opened the bag to reveal a very nice black snap button overcoat. "Wow... I love it!" I smiled. "Thank you so much!"
"Don't mention it hon." Mrs. Cake smiled. "Bring it here." She offered up a hug to which I accepted. "Pinkie, why don't you open up your's now." Before she could even finish, tissue paper from the bag flew across the room. Pinkie's gift was an overcoat similar to mine in a baby blue color.
"I love it! It's so cute!" She smiled holding the coat up.
"Why don't you two try them on?" Mrs. Cake asked. We soon slipped our coats on and Mrs. Cake smiled. "They look perfect! get close together, let me take a picture!" She said setting up a camera. "3...2...1... Say cheese!" She said.
"Cheese!" We both smiled as she took the picture.
"There! Oh! You two look great!" She smiled. "Before I forget..." She said pulling out a card. "The twins insisted on making a card for you two." Mrs. Cake smiled handing Pinkie the construction paper card. Across the top said "Happy Hearthswarming Aunt Pinkie" with a couple of the letter backwards in little kid fashion, but what caught me off guard was what was underneath. "...and Uncle Chuck". I don't consider myself too sentimental, but I'll admit that did choke me up reading that. In the card was a little crude crayon drawing of Pinkie, The Cakes, the twins, and I around a Hearthswarming tree. The whole thing was honestly really sweet. Unexpected however since I haven't been here all that long.
"Awww" Pinkie smiled reading the card.
"Cute isn't it?" Mrs. Cake asked.
"Sure is!" Pinkie beamed. "Don't you think Chuckie?" She asked me. I sniffed a little bit.
"It sure is." I smiled.
"Oh Chuck, I had no idea you were such a softy." Mrs. Cake remarked. I quickly dismissed the notion.
"Softy? Me? No way, just a little dust in the eye that's all." I said. Mrs. Cake and Pinkie could both see through me.
"Yeah sure Chuckie, I'll let you believe that." Pinkie giggled giving me a kiss on the cheek.
"I won't tell anypony. Don't worry Chuck." Mrs. Cake winked. "Now don't you two have a train to catch?" She asked.
"We sure do. We'd better get on our way." I said turning to Pinkie.
"That's right!" Pinkie nodded as we went on our way. "Tell the twins we loved the card!" Pinkie said as we went out the door.
"I will!" Mrs. Cake called as we left with our luggage.
"You ready for the trip?" Pinkie asked me.
"I sure am." I nodded.
On the train
After saying goodbye to all our friends we boarded the train, we were the only ones headed that way so having the whole car and pretty much train to ourselves was really fun. We set our luggage in one set of seats and roamed around the car mostly. We'd race the aisles up and down, race fruit down the aisle, orange beat apple every time for those who keep track. We'd pretend to be fancy delegates from other nations riding a train and puffing big cigars. The hours passed and eventually we were lounging back in our seats.
"Hey, Chuck?" Pinkie said to me as we laid back, I knew whatever it was it was serious, she barely ever called me just Chuck.
"Yeah Pinkie?" I turned and looked at her.
"I just wanted to say thank you, for agreeing to do this, I know you're scared to do this, and honestly so am I." She said. "I'm just really happy that you're so willing to do this with me."
"Of course I'd agree to it." I smiled at her. "I love you and I want to get to know your family." I held her hoof. "And who knows? Maybe this whole thing will just go really well!" I said with enthusiasm.
"Here's hoping." She smiled.
"Regardless, we have each other, right?" I smiled.
"Right." She smiled at me. "What did I ever do to deserve you?" She said hugging me.
"I don't know, but whatever it was, I'm glad you did it." I hugged back.
"I love you Chuckie." She said.
"I love you too." I held her close as our train ride continued, there was still another couple hours to go, a nap might help.
"Want to grab a little shut eye before we arrive?" I asked.
"That sounds good to me." She said leaning into me and closing her eyes. I wrapped one of my front legs around her and shut my eyes for a nap.
The arrival
"Chuck... Chuck... Chuckie wake up!" I opened my eyes to see Pinkie looking over me. I yawned feeling my sense coming back to me as I got up and stretched.
"We're here huh?" I asked.
"Yup!" She smiled.
"Is your family right outside the train?" I asked wiping at an eye.
"They sure are!" She nodded.
"We still going to do the box plan?" I asked.
"If you're okay with that!" Pinkie said.
"Let's do it." I say grabbing the large box. What was the box plan? Well, as a surprise, I'm going to hide in a large box and Pinkie will "open" it up as a way of telling the family. Here's hoping it would all go well.
Pinkie exited the train pulling behind her luggage and the large box behind her, which had my luggage and myself in it.
"Pinkamena, it is quite excellent to see thee once more my daughter." Her father, Igneous Rock Pie welcomed her.
"Hi dad!" Pinkie wrapped a large hug around him.
"Yes yes, we are so glad to see you. It was wonderful that thee could come home for Hearthswarming." Her mother Cloudy Quartz welcomed her.
"I'm so happy to be back! I've got a great surprise for you all this year!" Pinkie grinned widely.
"Pinkamena, surely thee must know how much thine father hates surprises." Her mother said.
"Quite true. For they are bad for my heart." He nodded.
"Don't worry, I bet you'll all love this surprise!" Pinkie grinned from ear to ear. I sure hope they were going to love this surprise, considering it was me.
"Well, surprises can wait. Let's get you home." Her father said as they made their way toward the farm. You know that feeling when you're watching a small animal cross a highway and you're absolutely sure the outcome is going to be terrible? Well, that was how I was feeling. Thank Celestia I could still breath from a couple of holes poked into the top, I was impressed Pinkie could pull her luggage and her coltfriend and his luggage in a giant box. I could hare Maud, Limestone, and Marble talking with Pinkie behind their parents.
"What's in the box?" Limestone sneered. "It better not be better than my gift for mom and dad. I hate it when you do that!"
"I know what it is." Maud said.
"No fair! Why does she get to know and not me?" Limestone asked.
"She saw hi- it before she should have." Pinkie laughed slightly.
"It's not that big and grand. A little boring if you ask me." Maud winked at Pinkie with about as big a smile she can muster, which is a slight grin.
"I like to imagine I'd be an alright surprise." I muttered at the comment.
"Did that box just... talk?" Limestone asked.
"What!? I- I didn't hear anything!" Pinkie said, after saying that she kicked the box with her hind leg. I guess that was her way of telling me to shut up, I had probably better do as I was told.
"Uh huh..." Limestone said. "I think you're lying."
"I swear! Honest!" Pinkie defended herself.
"I heard a voice! It was deep too, like a criminal! Are you harboring a criminal? Because if you think you can hide a criminal on my farm so help me Celestia-" Limestone was cut off by Maud.
"She's telling the truth. Clearly you were just hearing things." She said. Limestone exchanged looks between the two of them, then at the box.
"Alright. If you insist." She said with an annoyed tone.
"She is not going to be happy when she finds out you were lying." Maud said quietly to Pinkie.
"It's not lying! It's bending the truth for the sake of a surprise!" Pinkie said defending her actions.
"Come to think of it, she'd probably be mad regardless." Maud said. Her statement made Pinkie laugh loudly.
"What's so funny?" Limestone asked sharply.
"Nothin'." Pinkie said with a little laugh.
Pie Family Rock Farm
"Welcome home Pinkamena." Igneous welcomed her as they arrived.
"Thanks pa!" She gave him another big hug coming through the door. "I'll just take my things to my room and I'll be down in a bit!" Pinkie winked pushing everything up the stairs. Once she got into her room, she tapped on the box. "Coast is clear." She whispered. I immediately tossed the lid of the box off and jumped out.
"Hallelujah! I was beginning to feel trapped in there." I said stretching my legs. She quickly shushed me.
"Keep it down, the house isn't all that sound proof." She whispered pressing her hoof against my mouth.
"Got it." I whispered taking her hoof off my mouth.
"Thanks again for agreeing to do this." She smiled.
"Are you kidding? I wouldn't have said no for anything!" I said.
"That's what I love about ya." Pinkie hugged me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
"Glad to know that's the only thing you love about me." I joked.
"Lemme rephrase that, one of many things I love about you." She smiled.
"That works." I gave her a kiss.
"Am I interrupting anything?" A flat voice asked. We both turned and looked at Maud. "You're lucky it was me. Mom was originally coming to check on you, but you know I can be very persuasive."
"Thanks Maud! You're a lifesaver!" Pinkie wiped sweat from her head.
"Definitely, and I'll have you know I'm not boring." I said.
"I was just joking. I thought you could tell." She said. "I was using my joke voice."
"You know, come to think of it, there was definitely a different tone in your voice." I lied.
"There you go. Anyway. You'd best not take too long up here. Mom and Dad will get suspicious." Maud warned.
"I won't!" Pinkie called as Maud left. "Well, you'd better get back in the box. Ready?" She asked.
"We're doing this now huh? Guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be." I said crawling into the box. "Are you ready?" I asked.
"Of course I am! I was born ready." She said confidently.
"Alright then, let's do this." I said shutting the lid on the box. I could feel each step as Pinkie lead the box down the stairs. "Okay. Here we go. focus. "Hi there, my name is Chuck, it's a pleasure to meet you all!" I whispered to myself.
"Hi everyponyyyy." Pinkie started setting the box down in the common area where her family was.
"Must thine surprise be for this very moment?" Her father asked.
"Trust me, it's better now than later." Pinkie winked.
"If it absolutely cannot wait. Very well." Igneous nodded.
"Okay! Well, this is mostly for meee but it's only right that you all get to see it too!" She said.
"Oh how very interesting." Limestone huffed.
"Limestone! Thine kin is trying to share something with us." Igneous scolded.
"Well, I'd like to introduce you all to my surprise... Chuck!" She said lifting up the lid, I climbed out of the box and stood next to her.
"Pinkamena, for what reason is thine surprise a colt hiding within a box?" Her father asked. Oh boy.
"Dad, Mom, Limestone, Marble... Chuck is, well, my special somepony!" She said putting one front leg around me. There was a long pause for a moment, I wasn't quite sure what was going to happen at this point.
"I beg your pardon?" Her mother finally spoke up.
"Chuck and I have been... together for a little while now? In a romantic fashion?" Pinkie said trying to make them understand.
"Ah yes, now I understand." Her father nodded, and then all of a sudden his eyes widened to an extreme that was almost frightening. "WHAT!?" He bellowed. Here we go...
"This is gonna be fun to watch." Limestone grinned.
"Sir, um.. Mr. Pie, I... Um.." I began.
"I will speak to thee in a moment young colt!" He said to me.
"Igneous, doth thou not think that thou art overreacting a little?" Cloudy Quartz.
"Did thou not just hear what our daughter just said?" He asked.
"Yes Igneous, however, perhaps this colt is suitable for Pinkamena." She suggested. Igneous stared at me with an angry expression.
"Very well. Thy name is Chuck, be it not?" He asked.
"Yes indeed sir." I nodded respectfully.
"Chuck. Please, do share thine story to myself and my kin." He said gritting his teeth slightly.
"Tell you about myself?" I asked. Pinkie looked at me and seemed to mouth "Go on." Here goes nothing... "Well, I am an entertainer of sorts. I sing, tell jokes, I even used to do a little bit of acting. When I'm not doing any of that, which is quite often, I run my own business." I said.
"What kind of business, do tell?" He said.
"A tavern." I said.
"Oh Celestia..." He put his hoof to his face. "My daughters run off with a boozer..."
"Daaaad, there's more to Chuck than that!" Pinkie defended me.
"Very well. Continue." He said.
"Tell them about where your from." Pinkie whispered to me.
"Worth a shot." I whispered back. "Let me tell you this, this is an interesting story." I began. "I'm not from Equestria you see. I am from a place far away from here." I told my story to her family. I was met with strange, questioning looks the entire story. Of course, I was used to looks like that when explaining myself, Hell I was used to those looks whenever I said anything really. As I finished my story, Cloudy Quartz, Limestone, Marble just stared at me with hanging jaws. Igneous' eyes just narrowed.
"Thine origins are of a completely different realm?" He asked.
"Well, well yes I guess they are." I said. "But I mean, I'm still technically 100% pony now, at least I think I am." I said. "So you wouldn't have to worry about any complications genetically or anything."
"Complications genetically? Why would that be an issue?" He asked. "Hast thine been... fornicating?" He said with shock.
"What!? No, no no no no no. That isn't what I meant!" I said. "I simply meant, I mean, come on, everypony wants grandfoals someday..."
"Chuck. Mayday! Mayday!" Pinkie murmured to me.
"Grandfoals!?" He exclaimed.
"Not, not anytime soon anyway heheh..." I said nervously.
"Igneous! Come with me, let me brew thee some tea." Cloudy Quartz said leading a sputtering Igneous into the kitchen.
"Nice, bravo! Great show! You sure know how to pick 'em sis!" Limestone smirked.
"Limestone. Try and be nice." Maud said to her.
"Pinkie, I'm sorry my first impression didn't go well..." I said feeling sorry for the little disaster that just happened.
"Chuckie, it's okay." She said. "We still have a couple of days, then who knows? I'm sure you two will be the bestest of friends!" She smiled hopefully.
"Here's hoping." I smiled, suddenly, Cloudy Quartz came through the door.
"That should calm his old bones down." She said.
"I'm sorry Ma." Pinkie said to her mother as she came in.
"Why? It is not thine fault, it is thine father. If this helps, young colt, Chuck, was it? I hath no problems with thee. Thy seemeth to be a fine colt."
"Thank you ma'am." I smiled.
"However, I must admit, thine origins did confuse me a little, doth thou know how you cameth to be here?" She asked.
"That's just it, I have no idea." I shrugged.
"Perhaps the Choosing Stone took favor to thee." She suggested.
"It's a possibility." I nodded.
"The Choosing Stone worketh in mysterious ways." She said.
"I'm sure it does, who knows, could be the Choosing Stone." I shrugged.
"Either or, I'm just happy you came!" Pinkie kissed my cheek.
"So am I." I smiled.
"Worry not for how Igneous feels. Surely time will change his mind." Cloudy encouraged me.
"Here's hoping." I said.
"Now, Let me show thee to a guest room." She said leading me up the stairs. "I may like thee, but thy and Pinkamena will not be sharing a room."
"Thank you Mrs. Pie." I said following her.
"Thou art welcome, Chuck." She said.
Later that night
I was settling into my bed (which was quite comfortable actually, I would have to ask later what the mattress was made from...), thinking about how I could make myself appear worthy, respectable even, to Pinkie's father, when suddenly I heard a knock on the door. "C'mon in." I said.
"Hi Chuckie." Pinkie said walking in, I sat up to talk to her.
"Hi Cutie Pie, what brings you here?" I asked.
"Just thought that I'd pop in to say goodnight, that's all." She said sitting down next to me.
"Well, that is always welcome." I smiled.
"Also, don't worry about Pa, he'll come around." She said. "He wasn't too happy when he got word Maud was friends with a Unicorn either."
"Isn't that a little racist?" I asked.
"It was about the magic, not the horn." She said. Yeah, but I mean, still...
"Ah, I see." I nodded.
"Like I said, we've still got a couple of days, just be yourself!" She said.
"My booze selling, lousy comedian, dimensional immigrant self." I cocked an eyebrow.
"Hey, he never said anything about you being a comedian!" She slugged my shoulder playfully.
"That's true, Goodnight Cutie Pie." I said giving her a kiss.
"Goodnight Chuckie." She kissed me back. "See you in the morning." She said as she got up.
"I can't wait." I smiled as she shut the door behind her. Another day, another start, but not another story, this will definitely take a few chapters to wrap up.
Ooh wee! What a chapter! Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed the arthritis I get from typing! Until the next time in "Meeting the family part 2!" Probably not the real title.