DAN VS.

Dan was sitting on his couch, watching TV, as suddenly someone knocked on his door.

„Who dares to disturb me while I watch TV?" He asked himself as he opened the door to see three young fillies standing in front of him „Oh great, pony pathfinders..." He rolled his eyes.

„That's right" one of the three, a white unicorn, said „We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders, on a quest to find our Cutie Marks! I am Sweetie Belle, the pegasus is Scootaloo, and the third one there is Applebloom."

The orange pegasus continued: „And today we are pathfinders, trying to help other people and ponies. And at the moment we are selling apples for Applejack!"

Then the three of them shouted: „CUTIE MARK CRUSADER PATHFINDERS! YAY!"

At that shouting the whole house began to shake, and Dan said: „Well, if you are pathfinders, and you want to help me, then help me and GO AWAY! And just because I'm curious: I think I have seen you little filly before..." he thought pointing at the third one, that Applebloom.

Applebloom realized: „Uh, girls, I think he's right, we should go... now!"

„No way!" the other two fillies answered „CUTIE MARK CRUSADER PATHFINDERS FOREVER!"

And this time the whole house fell apart!

„My house!" Dan shouted „Now I know where I have seen you before, Applebloom! I trapped you inside my fridge when I took revenge on Applejack! And now... you three are NEXT!"

„Oh no..." Applebloom said as Dan lifted his fist into the air and shouted:

„CUUTIE MAARK CRUSAAADEEERS!"

DAN

VS.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders

The three little fillies ran away in fear, and Dan shouted after them: „And don't come back here... ever again!"

He then called Chris, who greeted: „Hey, Dan! Having a good day?"

„HAVING A GOOD DAY!?" Dan shouted „I GOT DISTURBED FROM WATCHING TV, ANNOYED BY SOME CUTIE MARK CRUSADER PATHFINDERS, AND THE SAME ONES DESTROYED MY HOME, LEAVING ME HOMELESS! AND YOU ARE ASKING ME IF I AM HAVING A GOOD DAY? Yeah, the day is nice so far, but I need to slumber at your house for a while until my home is repaired."

„Wait a minute..." Chris said and then asked Elise, who was in the next room: „Hey, Elise! Dan's house got destroyed. Can he stay with us for a while?"

Elise answered: „Sure. If his house is destroyed, I guess it's an emergency..."

„It's settled" Chris talked to Dan on the phone again.

Dan then said: „Oh, and could you help me on my revenge against these Cutie Mark Crusaders?"

„Are you going to hurt them or use any kind of fire?" Chris asked.

„No! They are kids! That would be inhumanly! I am not a monster, Chris!"

„In that case I'm in." Chris answered „What did you have in mind?"

„Can you carry four bags of the weight of one grown mare per bag?" Dan asked.

Chris answered: „Uh, I think I would need a cart for that WAIT WHY?"

„You'll see. Meet me in one hour at the ruins of my home. I need to get a cart..."

---

2 hours later, Dan and Chris finished the plan and the four bags were filled and loaded onto the cart. Now they were on their way to Chris' home.

„I can't believe we captured Applejack, Rarity and Rainbow Dash and left the Crusaders a message to stop searching for their Cutie Marks if they ever want to see their most beloved ponies again!" Chris said in a sad voice „But there is one thing I don't understand: You already captured another pony before I met up with you... Who IS in that fourth bag?"

„Oh, just a backup plan, in case this one won't work" Dan answered.

They were now standing in front of Chris' house, and just as Chris wanted to open the door, the Cutie Mark Crusaders came from behind and knocked the two out.

„No one messes around with the Cutie Mark Crusaders!" Scootaloo said angrily.

Then the three shouted all together: „CUTIE MARK CRUSADER RESCUERS!"

But in that moment Elise came out through the door and thought the Crusaders were intruders who captured innocent ponies in bags and knocked out Dan and Chris, for short: criminals. So she used her kung fu skills to to knock out the Crusaders as well.

„What did you do to Chris, Dan and these ponies!?" Elise asked angrily.

Applebloom answered: „What did WE do? Dan and Chris were the ones who captured our loved ones, so we were going to save them! And for that we needed to make Dan and Chris unconcious..."

„Oh" Elise realized „Sorry. Should have expected that. Here, I will release them for you..."

So Elise released Applejack, Rarity and Rainbow Dash. As she opened the fourth bag, she thought: „Ooohh, alright, backup plan. Don't want to ruin Dan's fun completely..." So she closed the bag again.

As Dan woke up, he saw the three freed ponies looking at him angrily.

„Oooh, heeyy..." he said „Good news! I wasn't going to hurt you in any way! I just wanted to keep you until the Cutie Mark Crusaders surrendered all their dreams!"

„Do you have milk in your fridge?" Rarity asked Elise „With a lot of lactose?"

„Sorry, we ran out." Elise answered.

„It's your lucky day, partner!" Applejack said to Dan, and the three of them left. Then Rainbow Dash came back one more time to punch him in the face and left again.

As Chris also woke up, Dan stood up and said: „Chris? Get up, it's time for plan B."

„But I just woke up! And I feel incredibly dizzy..."

„I don't care! Besides, shut up. Now stand up! We have some destruction to do!"

---

Little time later, Dan and Chris were standing in the middle of Sweet Apple Acres, just in front of the Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse.

„Now tell me, Chris..." Dan asked „What is every Crusader's favorite thing to do?"

„Well, Sweetie Belle likes to play the piano, Scootaloo is riding her scooter a lot, and Applebloom... I don't know, I guess the family business is pretty important to her... Why?" Chris said.

„Thank you very much!" Dan answered and first took Scootaloos scooter, which was standing at an apple tree, and took it apart so everything that was left were useless pieces. He then faced Sweetie Belle's piano, which was placed next to another apple tree.

He was about to blow it up with explosives, but Chris reminded him: „No fire..."

Dan took out a match and a lighter, but Chris repeated: „NO FIRE!"

„Fine!" Dan answered, took out a big hammer and smashed the piano apart!

Then he used a chainsaw to cut all the apple trees around the Crusader's treehouse.

„Someone will get less money for a while" Dan smiled „And someone will get into a lot of trouble... and it's not me!"

Chris smiled: „It's funny that you are destroying everything around their clubhouse, but not the clubhouse itself..."

As he realized what he said, he covered his mouth, and Dan said: „Hey, that's not a bad idea, Chris!"

So Dan got up the tree up to the treehouse and destroyed it with his bare hands! Chris was impressed.

But suddenly they heard voices coming closer, and Dan said: „Oh no! Quickly, let's hide in the bushes!"

So Dan and Chris jumped into the bushes and saw the Sweetie Belle, Applebloom and Scootaloo returning to their meeting place, the clubhouse. They were shocked!

„My scooter!" Scootaloo shouted.

„My piano!" Sweetie Belle cried.

„The apple trees! I am doomed!" Applebloom shouted.

„Yes! It's working!" Dan whispered.

But then he heard Applebloom saying: „We can't let it be like that! If my family finds out about the missing apple trees, they will banish me to the Everfree Forest, for sure!" she then looked at her two friends and added: „Oh, uh, and the broken scooter and piano are also not acceptable, hehe..."

„But what can we do?" Sweetie Belle asked.

„We could fix all this stuff on our own..." Scootaloo said.

„Great idea!" the other two fillies said.

They then shouted together: „CUTIE MARK CRUSADER FIXERS! GO!"

And they fixed the whole clubhouse as well as the scooter and the piano. Everything looked like new!

But there was still one last problem: the trees.

„We can't ask Twilight or Rarity or any unicorn to help us fix the trees!" Applebloom said „They wouldn't understand the situation and tell my family that we were the ones who destroyed the trees!"

Scootaloo thought for a moment and then asked: „Sweetie Belle, you are a unicorn as well! Do you think you can do this?"

„No way!" Sweetie Belle answered „I am far too weak to be able to fix this!"

„But there's no other choice!" Scootaloo shouted.

Applebloom continued: „Please, Sweetie Belle! Try it at least! For me!"

„Fine" Sweetie Belle answered „But I can't promise anything!"

Her horn began to glow and the trees got fixed!

„I did it!" Sweetie Belle shouted excited „I really did it! I saved us a lot of trouble!"

„Oh come on!" Dan whispered.

Suddenly, something strange was happening: Something appeared on the Crusader's flanks...

„Huh?" they said, and suddenly all three of them had their cutie marks!

„GASP! OUR CUTIE MARKS!" they shouted in excitement „CUTIE MARK CRUSADER FIXERS! OUR DESTINY!"

---

Chris in the bushes giggled: „Haha! So far for your revenge, Dan! It didn't just backfire, but you also gave the Cutie Mark Crusaders their cutie marks!" Then he realized Dan was giggling as well „Wait, why are YOU laughing?"

„Well" Dan answered „Because my revenge WAS a success!"

„But the Crusaders got their... It has something to do with your backup plan, right?"

„Eeyup." Dan answered „Time to go home. Trixie, do the rest..."

Suddenly the great and powerful Trixie was next to Dan and Chris in the bushes and answered: „It was an honor to make business with you!"

So Dan and Chris left qietly, while Trixie removed the fake cutie marks from the Crusaders she put on them.

„What the..." Applebloom said.

Scootaloo continued: „The cutie marks were fake?"

„Aww" Sweetie Belle said „But hey, think about it: Getting our cutie marks already would have been lame anyway! I mean, the Cutie Mark Crusaders would have stopped to exist!"

„Right!" the other two answered „Time for even more adventure on our continuing quest for cutie marks!"

---

Dan in the meanwhile returned to his own home, which was repaired in the meanwhile. With the good feeling that he got his revenge, he returned to the television program, as suddenly someone destroyed his house once again!

„What?" Dan shouted „Are you fillies serious!?"

But he realized it weren't the Cutie Mark Crusaders who destroyed his home this time...

„That's for burning my house down!" Daring Do shouted and flew away.

Dan responded: „OH, COME ON!"

---

Once again thanks to hunter for the suggestion!