Hi guys! It's been quite a while, my apologies! I just have so much to do... But I need a break anyway, to just relax and catch up on my story.

Because, you know, I ball so hard. And mother truckers try to find me.

Dat sheet cray, dat sheet cray, dat sheet cray... Dat-sheet-cray.

Yeah, you probably think I'm a weirdo if you haven't heard Paris before. By Jay Z. I mention that song in so many of my author's notes... BUT IT'S SUCH A GOOD SONG...

But anyway. Enjoy!

---

This is absolutely ridiculous.

Konan stood in a long hallway with her Akatsuki teammates, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Twilight, Applejack, and Fluttershy.

"Okay, Aka... Aka..." Twilight stuttered.

"Akatsuki." Konan cut in blankly.

"YES! Atakusik."

Konan almost rolled her eyes. Inside, she was slapping herself silly.

"We plan to introduce you to the magic of FRIENDSHIP!" Twilight let her wings flap out dramatically, and each of her friends stamped a hoof and held their heads high.

"F*cking dramatic entrance... Ain't nobody got time fo' dat!"

She coughed, but retracted her wings and began to speak again.

"I've noticed a lot about this... team. You, Heedin. You talk so violently, nobody wants to listen to you. Plus, you don't respect anyone."

"HEY! BITCH, YOU WANT RESPECT, I'LL GIVE YA-"

A piece of duct tape magically floated towards Hidan, and stuck firmly to his muzzle.

"MMM! MMPHMMPH!"

"That's better. Kaku...zoop. You are getting in the way a little too often. Try to exercise a little self-control. There is no need to jump into every situation that you find.''

Kakuzu growled, and his stitches started to come alive. With a burst of magic and ice, they were frozen still.

"That proves my point. You're too fast to act. Deidari."

"It's DEIDARA, hmmm!"

"Indeed. Daideria."

You could hear the mouths on his hooves rustling with clay.

"You also act rashly, as Kakuzoop over there. But I've seen your style of fighting... We almost never battle in Ponyville, and our magic is used for practical things. But you don't even use magic from your horn, you just find these white bombs of different shapes and explode them on people."

"Grrr, hmmm. Respect my art, because it's not just a fighting style, hmmm. It's a way of life! Isn't that right, my man?!"

"One couldn't really call those hideous bombs ART."

Deidara gasped, and lowered his head in anger.

"Grrr... EXPLOSIONS ARE THE TRUE ART! The bombs are just the lovely casings that they are put in before being revealed to the WORLD, HMMM!"

"I don't find smoke and fire very artistic."

''DAMMIT, SASORI, HMMM! I SHOULD BLOW YOU TO-"

"Another problem with you, Sassoi. You argue with Daideria here too much."

"IT'S DEIDARA, HMMM!"

"Moving on, to Itachi here."

"There's nothing wrong with him!" Rarity chirped.

"Actually... Rarity's wrong. You shut yourself in too much. Help out sometimes. The meaning of teamwork is to work together."

Itachi blinked, but made no other mood. He knew it was true.

"And Kimase."

"KISAME."

"Sorry. Kasime. You are easily aggravated, AND you like to blame others and make fun of them."

"I only blame people who've done wrong, and that's everyone!"

"Including yourself."

"NO, I-"

"Moving on again. Zatsu, you're the same way. You aggravate people when they're already down. And Tobi... Sometimes, it's better not to jump in if you're only going to get in the way."

Zetsu snapped his Venus Flytrap Jaws shut, and quietly sank into the ground. Who knew he was such a softie?

As for Tobi, water was starting to stream out of his mask's eye hole.

"REALLY? TOBI ISN'T A GOOD PONY... WAAAAHHHH!"

Twilight muzzle quivered.

"Ugh, I can't do it anymore. I'm breaking their souls." She said, hanging her head.

"You're breaking my f*cking BALLS, BITCH!'' Hidan spat.

"HEY!" Rainbow Dash swooped in front of Twilight. "I have no problem breaking all a' y'alls BALLS! So here's why you're all messed up!"

She flapped her powder blue wings and stuck her hoof out at Hidan.

"Pottymouth."

At Kakuzu.

"No self-control."

Deidara.

"Doesn't think."

Sasori.

"Argues too much."

Itachi.

"Shut-in."

Kisame.

"Jerk."

Zetsu.

"Bothersome."

Tobi.

"Useless."

Rainbow Dash finally pointed her hoof at Pein and Konan.

"Paper flower... Colder than ice."

Konan ALMOST frowned. But, god forbid she ever make a facial expression that gave off the fact that she was capable of giving off emotions.

"Orange head... You're... a clumsy doofus."

"EHHHHHH?!"

"She just called leader-sama... a doofus..." Zetsu said, popping up from the ground.

"A clumsy one, too..." Itachi said, his eyes wide.

Pein had his head low, orange mane drooping down.

"Well... I guess it's true."

"EHHHHHH?!"

---

"Jeez, I'm getting really tired of waiting." Naruto said.

Team 7 was sitting in a fancy room with the door locked shut. Inside, there were 4 fluffy canopy beds with satiny purple blankets on them. The tall, crystal windows were lined with gold, and the floor below them was pure marble.

"Wow... I've never been in a castle like this before... Makes me feel like a princess!" Sakura giggled. "And Sasuke's the prince!"

Sasuke just walked away, his hooves clinking on the floor.

"Now, we need to find a way out of here!" Naruto yelled.

"Naruto." Kakashi said.

"What?"

"They don't seem to be hostile towards us. Their two queens/princesses are just upset that we were fighting. We can just do as they say and get out of here. Because scheming something difficult when we don't have to is just stupid."

"Yeah, Naruto, you idiot!" Sakura growled.

"EH?!''

"Cut it out." Sasuke said, giving a murderous glance to the both of them.

"Ooh..."

"Team 7." Came a booming voice from outside the room's door. With in a second, it swung open to reveal princess Luna.

"You will be held captive here until my sister decides what to do with you."

"Alright," Kakashi said, looking at her through a lazy black eye. "We'll be here if you... need us."

'"Eeep!" Luna squeaked, blushing. She then regained her composure and bowed. After a moment, she was gone.

"Wow, Kakashi-sensei, you sure can charm girls." Naruto said, looking up at Kakashi.

But Kakashi already had his muzzle buried in an Icha Icha Paradise book.

---

"WHAT?!" The Akatsuki yelped.

"We said we were gonna give ya' friendship trainin', and we MEANT IT!" Applejack said. "This here is your first test!"

The 10 Akatsuki ponies stood in front of thousands of lush green hedges... It was a MAZE.

"How... How does this work...?" Itachi asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Well, ya' partner goes up to that cloud up there." Applejack pointed to a large, fluffy cloud a little distance away from the maze.

"And...?"

"You go through the maze, trying to find the center and retrieve some treasure. Your partner has to give you instructions to find it... "

"WOW... That sounds really EASY. And pathetic!" Kisame channeled chakra into his hooves, and bounced up onto the cloud. Surprisingly, it supported his weight, and he didn't crash through.

"What if we DON'T want to do this?" Kakuzu hissed.

"Well, ya' see the sparkly magenta sky?"

He looked up. The sky was magenta indeed.

"Well, that's Twilight's magic. She's not letting you out. You can try to escape, but we all know that ya' won't. Plus, ya' probably can't use battle magic on it or whatever."

"Why are they so dead set on teaching us friendship, anyway, hmmm?" Deidara grumbled.

"Because this is PONYVILLE. A town for making friends. Do ya' know what the worst thing in life is? Not being able to HAVE friends. And without FRIENDS, all the fun is sucked outta your life! And we want everyone to be happy."

"WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE SO MUCH?!"

"Because that's what friends DO FOR EACH OTHER."

Deidara shut his muzzle. He looked to the ground, and looked at all his teammates. Did they make him happy? Would they do things for him?

He sighed. "Fine, hmmm, we'll try your stupid game."

"INDEED." Pein boomed from behind. "We WILL increase teamwork."

"GREAT! Now split up, y'all! It's time to do this!"

---

After half an hour, the Akatsuki were assembled. The reason it took so long was because each team kept quarreling over who would guide and who would follow.

"Alright! Remember, try to find the center of the maze and get the prize! And there are obstacles and monsters out there, so be careful!" Applejack hollered. "And a one, two, THREE!"

The ponies took off into the maze, surprisingly eager. Konan, Tobi, Itachi, Sasori, and Hidan were the maze runners, and Pein, Zetsu, Kisame, Deidara, and Kakuzu were the directors.

"Konan. Left."

"TOBI... Go past the delicious bunny and keep straight..."

"My MAN! Right, hmmm!"

"Hidan, you dimwit, obviously you should go left."

"ITACHI! Straight!"

After about 10 minutes of directing around the maze, Kisame started to get bored.

"Hey... What say we spice things up a little?" He whispered to Zetsu.

"Huh?"

"WELL, everyone is doing what we're telling them to, right? So what if we..."

Kisame started to whisper a little more into what looked like Zetsu's ear.

"Sounds... Fun... Kukukuku..." He said.

"Alright, let's do it. ITACHI! Go right!"

Itachi followed, yet "right" was the WRONG direction.

"Tobi, left."

"You're almost there, just go straight!"

"Come on, you're getting close. Go right."

The two mindlessly followed for a few minutes, and never realized that they were going in circles the entire time.

"Hey, Zetsu? Is anything coming up- AGH!"

Zetsu peered down at Tobi. Itachi was coming up the rear, looking at him.

"Tobi. What is it?"

"B..."

"Burglars?" Red seeped into Itachi;s eyes.

"B..."

"Bad people?"

"B..."

"WHAT IS IT?"

"BEETLE!"

In front of them stood a giant, ugly brown horned beetle the size of a bus.

"AAAAHHH!" Tobi screamed, running past Itachi and away.

Itachi shivered inside. He had always hated bugs, especially beetles. He remembered that unfortunate incident with an Aburame and some lettuce.

With that, he turned and ran away. FAR AWAY.

"AAAAHHHH! BEETLES SCARE TOBI!" He wailed, flailing his legs as he ran.

Itachi was petrified, too. But he kept silent.

The beetle scuttled towards them at an alarming rate. It was closing in.

"GO RIGHT, YOU TWO!" Kisame and Zetsu yelled together.

They both followed...

And hit a DEAD END.

Itachi growled, and almost formed a hand signal, when he remembered.

Jutsu won't work inside this stupid dome. CRAP!

The beetle was getting closer and closer, its ugly mandibles snapping hungrily. The black eyes of it glinted, and soon, the beetle's shadow loomed over the two ninja ponies.

"They led us here..." Itachi thought angrily. He was FURIOUS.

"Oh no... It's all over for Tobi..." Tobi whined.

They were both too stunned to act. How often do you see bus sized beetles, anyway?

It was closing in on them. They backed up, close against the wall.

The sharp mandibles of the bug were less than a foot away from the quivering faces of the two ninja ponies.

Kisame wasn't looking. He was too busy laughing at the look on Itachi's face. He didn't know that they were scared to death.

Snap snap, went the beetle as it became uncomfortably close to the two.

"Tobi... it's been nice knowing you... such a pathetic way to die..."

"TOBI IS SO SCARED! ITACHI, HOLD TOBI!"

"We really are going to hell, aren't we...? Well-"

"SHINRA TENSEI!"

---

And, that's the end of this chapter. CLIFFHANGER. WOOOH.

Anyways, hope you enjoyed! I'll write sooner this time, PROMISE!