Act Three

Wolfsheim grunted as he pushed the door open. Sunlight streamed into the interior of the shack, highlighting the dust stirred by the sudden change in air pressure as the door opened. (Not that the interior was pressurized, it was - you get it.)

He descended the steps and motioned for Celestia to follow. The inside of the shack was dim and dusty, with not much more than a few tables scattered about.

“So, what’s in here again?” Celestia asked.

“Well,” Wolfsheim said as he ran his hands over the walls. “When one is in my line of, perhaps it could be called work, one tends to stash things about just in case.”

“This is your safe house?”

“One of mine.”

“But it’s empty.”

Wolfsheim did not reply as he ran his hands underneath a table. With a low sound of triumph, he paused at a particular spot and a subdued click was heard. Suddenly panels in the floor slid back to reveal glass cases holding a variety of weaponry. A few other cases held ammunition and some explosives.

“Never can remember where I put the damn switches.” Wolfsheim said, looking around.

Celestia’s mouth was open in awe. “This is your safe house?”

“Didn’t you say that already?”

Celestia blushed. “Alright, I admit it, I was too quick in judgment.” she began to go about the safe house, peering inside each case. “So, what have we got to work with?”

“Oh, lots of things. Pistols, rifles, submachine-guns, assault weapons, shotgun, explosives, knives, swords. Pretty much everything but a kitchen sink.” Wolfsheim paused. “Come to think of it, I should install a sink in here, just as a precaution.”

Celestia nodded as she peered into a weapons case. A pair of silver-colored pistols caught her eye. Extracting them from their home, the sun-goddess turned them over in her hands.

They were shaped like Beretta 92s, but the barrels were a different size. Closer inspection told one that the weapon was chambered in .357 magnum rounds.

Celestia felt a smile on her face. “My little magnums.” she said, chuckling.

“Hm?” Wolfsheim said from the other side of the room.

“Nothing.” Celestia said, tucking the weapons into her belt.

“Here.” Wolfsheim said, tossing Celestia a harness and vest. “Body armor and a combat harness. Just strap on holsters.”

Celestia nodded and put on the equipment, finding and attaching holsters for her pistols. Meanwhile, Wolfsheim was tucking several guns into holsters that didn’t seem to be there before. He then pulled a pump-action shotgun from one of the cases.

“Alright, it’s high time we start really fighting back.” he said, setting the shotgun down as he pulled the black Desert Eagle from its shoulder holster and reloaded it.

Celestia looked at Wolfsheim in confusion. “Wait, you still have that?”

“Yeah.”

“I thought Glados had taken all of our things away during the tests.”

“She did.”

“And you got it back when we found her chamber.”

“Yes.”

“And you didn’t think to use it against her, or the homicidal cyborg.”

“Yep.” Wolfsheim answered, re-holstering the gun. He then looked at Celestia. “Something wrong?”

Celestia sighed and shook her head. “Nope, nothing at all.” she paused and then said, “You know, going after Nightmare-Moon is a near guaranteed suicide mission.”

“And?” asked Wolfsheim, a cocky smile on his face.

“And…” Celestia let her voice drop to a huskier tone. “Shouldn’t we take our opportunity?”

Wolfsheim seemed to think. “Well, I could call for back up, but the best I could do would probably be a bad idea.”

Celestia groaned and allowed her voice to return to normal. “Yeah, I suppose you would know. Any transportation around?”

“I’ve got something not far from here.” Wolfsheim beckoned and left the safe house.

Celestia sighed again as she shouldered the additional weapons she had gathered. “I swear, the only way I could through to him would be to strip naked and cover myself in, I don’t know, pudding.” she paused and though about it. “Mmm, pudding.”

******

Nightmare-Moon lounged on her throne. Well, it’s not really a throne, she thought irritably. But, after we’ve dealt with our sister and that rather attractive man in the suit jacket, we’ll have a real throne to lounge on.

Nightmare-Moon then though about what she had just thought. (Yo Dawg, we heard you like thinking.)

Why the hell did we label the human attractive? Well, he did have a certain quality that appealed to us. Can’t exactly place it though. Oh, what we wouldn’t do to have five minutes alone with him. We mean our sister! So we can take the throne! …And then he can take us - NO! Bad brain! Focus on taking control, then we can think about sexy time. …Mmm, sexy time…

As Nightmare-Moon’s thoughts continued, she failed to notice a proximity alert going off.

*******

“Stop-” Thunk! “-fricking-” Thunk! “-going-” Thunk! “-off!” Wolfsheim hit the small box protruding from the ground with the butt of his shotgun again.

The thing was controlling the proximity alarm, which he and Celestia had accidentally set off. So far, a number of hits had failed to shut the thing off. Gritting his teeth, Wolfsheim pulled one of his pistols from inside his jacket.

“Wolfsheim…” Celestia began, before her voice was drowned out by several gunshots.

When the brass shells had settled, the box sported several bullet holes, but was still running the alarm.

Wolfsheim glared at the box. “That’s it, I’m blowing it up.” he said as he reached for a grenade.

“Wolfsheim.” Celestia said more forcefully.

“Yes?” he asked, turning to her.

The sun-goddess bent down and opened a panel on the side of the box. She then reached inside and flipped a switch. The alarm cut out immediately.

Wolfsheim looked at Celestia sheepishly as she stood up. “Heh, who would have thought that was there?”

Celestia shook her head, smiling. “Yes, who would have.” the smile dropped from her face as she looked upwards and regarded the structure above them. “Nightmare-Moon always did have an extravagant taste.”

Wolfsheim and Celestia were standing on a sandy beach at twilight, a massive cliff rising above them. Built on top of, into the upper side, and one could assume inside as well was Nightmare-Moon’s base of operations. A far cry from the ruins from before, this place was more like and armored compound than anything else. From here they could make out a concrete wall easily twenty feet high complete with guard towers that rose up another twenty feet. Metal platforms and ladders hugged the side of the cliff, going from the bottom of the wall to about halfway down the cliff. From here they could see mounted guns scattered about the platforms and at least two in every tower. Extravagant indeed.

“Good thing there isn’t anyone manning their posts.” Wolfsheim said, scanning the cliffs.

They would get an eyeful if they were. Sure, Wolfsheim was just wearing his usual white suit jacket outfit, but Celestia? The goddess of the sun was decked out in a brown tank-top and cargo pants. She wore a Kevlar vest and combat harness over it. On the harness were several extra magazines for her assault rifle that was currently slung over her back and several grenades. Her pistols her in holsters at her waist along with a few spare magazines for them as well.

“Yeah, but shouldn’t someone have heard the alarm?” Celestia looked around suspiciously.

Wolfsheim glanced to his left. “There’s a path that leads up the cliff side over there. If they know about it then it’ll be booby-trapped, but I don’t think there’s another way to get up there.”

“Unless I could fly.” Celestia snorted.

Wolfsheim shrugged. “Hey, don’t blame me, blame the narrator.”

(Oh sure, blame the narrator, it’s not as if he has the power do as he pleases. Wait, yes I do.)

“Side path it is.” Celestia said, trotting over to the place Wolfsheim had identified.

The path was a series of switchbacks that ran up the side of the cliff and went forward along the cliff face until it was over water. Wolfsheim and Celestia climbed higher and higher until they ran out of path. The path ended abruptly just a foot or so beneath the base of the wall, near a guard tower.

Celestia opened her mouth to voice her frustrations when Wolfsheim made a movement with his hand, indicating she should be quiet. She clamped her jaw shut as Wolfsheim pointed up at a humanoid figure dressed in dark, modern armor and a gasmask that had just walked out onto the grate-like metal walkway that surrounded each tower’s cabin.

Wolfsheim reached into his jacket and pulled out a strange looking metal thing. But two arcs in the front snapped open and Celestia could see it was a crossbow. Wolfsheim pulled out a stock and then shouldered the weapon.

A deep but soft twang sounded as the crossbow fired. The unfortunate guard was hit in the head and fell over the railing, flipping end over end to splash distantly in the waters below.

Wolfsheim reloaded the crossbow with a bolt that had a cable trailing from the end. He fired it at the guard tower’s roof, the bolt embedding itself in the stone. He then used another bolt to anchor the other end securely to the rock face.

“Ladies first.” Wolfsheim said, gesturing to the cable.

Celestia rolled her eyes and began shimmying up the cable. She soon reached the guard tower and pulled herself up onto the platform. She turned to help up Wolfsheim, but couldn’t see him.

“I’m right here.” Wolfsheim said from behind Celestia.

She turned to see Wolfsheim sitting on the guard tower’s roof. “How…”

Wolfsheim shrugged. “Magic.”

Celestia opened her mouth to question him further, but decided not to bother. She closed her mouth and scanned the compound from her vantage point in the guard tower. As far as she could tell, the place was deserted.

She turned to Wolfsheim, who was busy taking apart the mounted guns inside the tower. “What do you think?”

“It must be near time for a shift change, everyone’s inside.”

Celestia nodded and then quietly jumped down to the ground, landing with a soft thump. Wolfsheim tried to do the same, but just ended up crashing on the ground. Luckily though, he somehow managed to do so quietly,

He quickly got up and brushed himself off; looking around to make sure no one saw him do that.

Celestia sighed. “You finished?”

Wolfsheim shrugged. “Hey, we can’t let this get too serious.”

Celestia shook her head. “Fine. Are you ready?”

Wolfsheim checked his shotgun and nodded. “Let the senseless slaughter of mooks begin.”

Celestia pulled the bolt on her assault rifle in an amazingly badass manner. Wolfsheim, of course, ruined the moment by whistling.

Celestia glared at him and then just shook her head.

The two approached the two double doors, both holding their weapons in ready positions and wearing stern expressions. They hardly broke stride as they simultaneously raised legs to kick in the door.

*Bang!*

“Ow, ow, ow, ow!”

However, they seemed to have missed the ‘pull’ sign.

There was a sudden hail of gunfire from within the building. However, it would seem that the armed henchmen (And women, we are equal opportunities here) had forgotten that the doors were armored. The chorus of bullet ricochets, curses, and yells of pain brought a borderline sociopathic grin to Celestia’s face. Wolfsheim looked at her uneasily.

The doors suddenly were thrown open as two guards ran out. But before they could do much of anything, they were put down by a shotgun blast and burst from an assault rifle respectively.

The dimension hopper and the princess-turned-badass charged into the room, gunning down those that dared oppose them. The inside was like a mess hall, probably was, if one were to think about it.

However, as they exited the mess hall, the stark contrast of the next room startled them. The mess hall was mundane and ordinary, this new room was made of concrete and blue metal, a rack housing several advanced looking assault rifles.

Examining one of the rifles, Wolfsheim said, “Interesting, this says that it is a ‘standard issue Overwatch pulse rifle’. Heh, the last time I heard that…” Wolfsheim trailed off as his brain processed. “Ah hell, this either means I have to fight Combine or Xenomorphs. Headcrabs or Facehuggers.”

Celestia looked at her companion, confused. “What are you talking about?”

“Never mind, unless you see some sort of tan-brown little thing scampering around, in which case please mention it. Oh, and don’t let them got on your head or face.”

“Okay.” Celestia said slowly. This whole ordeal was starting to take a toll on her sanity. Wait, starting?

Wolfsheim opened the next door and they made their way down a hallway with a black and white tiled floor. And ceiling. And walls. Wolfsheim couldn’t help but hum the Twilight Zone theme.

However, after they had gone through the hallway and through another door, Wolfsheim wondered if the theme was strangely appropriate.

They were now on a platform overlooking a large warehouse-like room. On the floor below, a few dozen of the gas-masked soldiers over-watched scores of large, black, familiar looking Xenomorphs march towards armored personnel carriers.

“So, I guess Nightmare-Moon has moved from simply taking over Equestria to purging it and starting anew.” Wolfsheim said grimly.

Celestia stared at the creatures below. “What are they? What is she planning to do?”

“The gasmasks are trans-human Combine soldiers. The black things are called Xenomorphs, nasty pieces of work, acid for blood.”

“Seriously?”

Wolfsheim nodded. “Luckily, it would seem that they currently lack any face huggers. But, that will change if any of the Aliens grown into a Queen. And no, they don’t have princesses.”

Celestia looked at Wolfsheim in confusion. “I wasn’t going to ask.”

“I wasn’t talking to you.”

“Oh.” Maybe it’s not my sanity I should be concerned with. Aloud, the sun-goddess said, “So, how are we going to deal with them?”

“Well, we could go down there and shoot them all to death.” Wolfsheim grinned and took off his hat. “Or we could just use the Holy Hand-Grenade.”

Wolfsheim reached into his hat, but before he could extract the blessed artifact, a voice cut through the air.

“Oh, no need for that now.”

Looking up, Wolfsheim and Celestia saw Nightmare-Moon standing on a platform higher up. Before either could say anything, a lasso of dark-blue magic shot forth form the fallen princess and wrapped itself around Wolfsheim.

“Yoink!” cried Nightmare-Moon triumphantly, her magic yanking Wolfsheim up and into her waiting arms.

“Hey!” Wolfsheim and Celestia cried in unison.

“Sorry Sister-Dear, but we have pressing matters to attend to. But fear not! We shall leave you in the very capable hands of our subordinates. Or claws, as it were.” A beam of magic shot from Nightmare-Moon’s horn and hit the platform, causing it to come loose of its supports. “Ta-la, Sister-Dear!”

And the goddess of the moon disappeared in a flash of magic and echoing laughter.

“You motherfu- whoa!” shouted Celestia as the platform shifted beneath her hooves.

With the sound of tortured metal, the platform ripped free of its supports and slid down the slopping wall with a shower of sparks and the shriek of metal on metal.

This, quite obviously, attracted the Combine and Xenomorphs’ attention.

Celestia coughed and waved a hand in front of her face to clear away the dust the impact had generated. Upon seeing her foes approaching her, the goddess of the Sun voiced a very appropriate sentiment.

“Oh shit.”

However, Celestia then remembered that her sister, her little sister, had quite recently dropped her into this situation. And that the bitch had stolen her new best friend. And she had a fully automatic rifle chambered in 7.62mm ammunition.

Let’s just say the next thirty seconds were filled with lead.

Celestia reloaded her rifle and then noticed Wolfsheim's shotgun laying next to her. She slung her rifle over her back and picked up the scattergun, pumping it in a particularly badass manner.

She also managed to catch the unused shell she had just ejected and put it back in the weapon. Whew, that was close. Almost looked like an idiot there.

The princess of the day began walking forward with powerful strides, stepping over fallen soldiers and avoiding puddles of acid. She saw a gas masked soldier pop out from behind an APC with a grenade in his hands. A quick blast from the shotgun put him down.

However, the blast had not killed him. As the soldier struggled to get up, he noticed the pin of the grenade was on his finger.

Celestia hardly blinked as the APC’s back end was lifted by an explosion, nor did she pay any heed to the black smoke that billowed from hit.

A Xenomorph suddenly leapt out of nowhere and landed in front of Celestia. The Alien roared, tail flailing behind it. Celestia growled at it. The Xenomorph seemed stunned, but quickly opened its jaws to roar again.

An unimpressed Celestia shoved the barrel of the shotgun in the creature’s mouth. “Eat this, bitch.”

The shotgun roared and the back of the Xenomorph exploded outwards, the acid conveniently hit a Combine soldier that had run up behind the alien.

Celestia quickly pulled the shotgun back lest it be damaged by the Xenomorph’s acidic blood. She pumped it again fired it towards another Alien creature as it leapt through the black smoke pouring out of the APC.

Several more of the creatures began climbing over the vehicle, hissing threateningly. Aiming downwards, Celestia put the remaining shells in the gun’s tube into the general location of the APC’s gas tank.

It had the desired effect. The fireball started somewhere inside the transport and rapidly expanded, consuming the vehicle and lifting it a dozen feet into the air.

Celestia unsung her assault rifle and charged towards the nearest APC. She took cover behind it and peeked out to get a view of any targets. She ducked back as a few soldiers fired upon her.

Seeing another APC across from her, Celestia made a break of cover, firing at her foes. Taking cover again, Celestia steadied her breathing as she crouched low.

Peeking underneath the transport, Celestia saw a few pairs of boots approaching her position. She dropped low and emptied her magazine from beneath the APC. Many Combine soldiers fell over when rifle rounds shattered their ankles and were dispatched by subsequent shots to their torsos. A few managed to scamper back to cover.

Celestia peeked out from cover again and ducked back as a light machine-gun nearly took her head off.

Cursing, Celestia contemplated how to deal with it. Ideally, she could always use the bulletproof Wolfsheim as a distraction. But seeing as how he wasn’t there, she would have to improvise.

The sun goddess turned her attention to the thing she was using as cover. The APC’s armor certainly seemed to be holding up the enemy’s fire. If she could get inside, she could simply use the vehicle as a battering ram.

Celestia slowly crept to the other side of the APC and peeked around the corner. Seeing no one, she edged along the vehicle, aware of the bursts of machinegun fire that pounded into the APC’s side.

She soon reached the cab, but found the door locked.

“Oh, you are bucking kidding me, right?” Celestia asked the door.

The door didn’t answer.

Shaking her head, Celestia slung her rifle over her back and leaned in to examine the lock on the door. She supposed she could pick it. You know, if she had anything to pick it with and actual knowledge of lock-picking.

Still contemplating what to do, Celestia heard a deep hiss and turned to see another Xenomorph looming over her.

“Excuse me, I’m kind of busy here.” she said irritably.

This seemed to confuse the Xenomorph, which worked perfectly for Celestia. She grabbed the Alien behind the jaw and slammed its head into the door. She pulled her right pistol from its holster and shoved it next to her hand, blowing a hole through the Xenomorph.

The creature screeched and its tail whipped around, trying to impale Celestia. She dodged it and caught part of under her hoof. She aimed the pistol downward, put several rounds into the tail, and then put the rest of the magazine through the Xenomorph’s quite honestly phallic head.

(Seriously, go back and watch Alien. Its head is very phallic.)

The creature gave a gurgling screech and died. But it had served its purpose. The Xenomorph’s acid blood had corroded the door and it was simple for Celestia to clear away the ruined metal.

Celestia reloaded her pistol and clamored into the cab, keeping low so as to avoid being seen. She found the key in the ignition and turned it, the sound of the sound of the vehicle’s engine unheard over the sound of the machine-gun.

Celestia waited while she listened to the gunner’s firing pattern. At a break that had lasted long enough to be a reload, Celestia popped up and floored it. The APC lurched forward and gathered speed, barreling towards the dumfounded Combine soldiers. They were not quick enough to get out of the way and were crushed underneath the armored transport’s huge tires.

Celestia kept the vehicle going and crashed it into another of its kind, near a door. Celestia found a door between the two front seats and got through it using the key. She found herself in the troop compartment and found a ladder up into a gun turret.

She got herself into the turret and saw many Xenomorphs loping towards her. She grabbed the controls for the turret and began firing, cutting down Xenomorphs like so many blades of grass.

Xenomorphs cried out dying screeches as bullets tore through them and their acid blood spill over the floor. But, there was just so many. Like an advancing wall of fire, Celestia could only slow their advance and she only had so much ammo for the turret.

She suddenly saw an end to the Xenomorphs’ numbers and saw the last few slowing their advance, reluctant to be killed as well. And the turret suddenly ran dry.

Bolstered by the turret’s sudden silence, the half-dozen or so remaining Xenomorphs increased their speed. The closest leapt towards Celestia with a screeching roar, only to suddenly land on the turret’s twin barrels.

The air was filled with a horrid acidic smell as superheated metal came in contact alien flesh. The Xenomorph screeched in pain as the barrels burned its body. The other creatures were deterred, believing the turret may still be functional.

They slowed and circled as their comrade died on the turrets barrels, waiting as its blood rendered the gun inoperable. As the body slumped off the turret and fell to the ground the Xenomorphs leapt onto the ACP and quickly scurried down the gunner hole.

They expected to find trapped prey. What they did find were several round objects that admitted a high-pitched whine.

To date no one is sure if the Xenomorphs have any conventional language or what any of it sounds like. However, I do believe that the Xenomorphic equivalent of ‘Oh shit!’ was said just then.

The inside of the APC was abruptly filled with fire, shrapnel, bits of Xenomorphic flesh and bone, and acid. Which somehow caused the APC to explode as well. This explosiveness appeared to have spread to the other transport, as it too was feeding its mass into the increasingly large fireball.

Celestia paid no mind to massive explosion as she walked through the door near where she had crashed the APC, her rifle up and ready, rainbow-colored hair waving from some freak breeze.

********

Nightmare-Moon was giggling like a filly on Hearth’s Warming day and she didn’t care in the slightest.

Her, snicker, ‘inner sanctum’ as she called it, was a large circular room with several tables holding various objects scattered about. There were two large bookshelves flanking the door that led to the rest of her base. Beyond these, there were actually no walls, only slightly higher than waist-high stone walls keeping one from falling into a swirling abyss. It was anyone’s guess if there was actually a drop or it was purely a pleasing to look at illusion. At the back of her lair was a short set of stone steps that lead to an obelisk.

Chained to said obelisk, was none other than Wolfsheim.

“You keep giggling like that and people will think your insane.” he said.

“As if we cared.” Nightmare-Moon snorted.

“What? Oh, I wasn’t talking to you.”

Nightmare-Moon got a peculiar look on her face as she stared at Wolfsheim. She then shook her head and moved back to the center of the room.

“I’ll admit I’m curious.” Wolfsheim said from the obelisk. “Why did you grab me and not Celestia?”

“We want your magical rod.” Nightmare-Moon said simply.

“My what?”

“The cane, idiot.” The moon goddess said irritably. “It quite obviously has a very large power supply and we are sure it shall be simple to bend it to my will. We believe it will be far more gratifying to rule over all of creation rather than a single country.”

A sly smile then crept over Nightmare-Moon’s face. “Although, while we’re on the subject…”

She began to saunter over to Wolfsheim. He became very uneasy as she came right up to where he was chained.

“We’ll admit, we just might have a few… heh, ulterior motives in grabbing you.”

“Is it an excuse for the fan-girls to see me in chains?”

“Perhaps…” she whispered in a voice like silk, tracing a finger down his chest.

Wolfsheim squirmed as Nightmare-Moon invaded his personal space.

“Come now, resistance only makes us hotter.” she said, smiling.

“You’re just, uh, not my type?” Wolfsheim said nervously.

“You mean you aren’t attracted to a girl with big tracts of land?” she was grinning now.

“I, uh, have a headache?”

Nightmare-Moon leaned back and a small burst of magic went from her horn to Wolfsheim. “Not anymore.” She said in a singsong voice.

“I’m not really in the mood.” Nearly sweating now.

“Would you be if we did something suggestive with this banana?” she asked, holding up the fruit in question.

Wolfsheim pursed his lips. “… Yes, but that’s not the point.”

Nightmare-Moon giggled and was likely about to say something even more suggestive, but she was cut off by a very loud explosion that shattered the door to her lair into scores upon scores of splinters. Good thing Wolfsheim and Nightmare-Moon were at the far end of the chamber, or they might have been injured by said fragments.

Through the now empty doorway walked a slightly singed and very miffed Princess Celestia, holding her assault rifle by its pistol grip down by her side. Her armored vest was pocket-marked and chipped, her clothes torn and singed as well. And her hair was a mess.

Perhaps miffed isn’t strong enough a word.

“Damn.” said Wolfsheim, staring at Celestia.

“Sister.” Celestia growled, staring daggers at Nightmare-Moon. “I believe you and I are about to have a very serious discussion.”

Surprisingly, despite a stare that could quite possibly reduce any mere mortal to tears or ashes, Nightmare-Moon laughed.

“Really now, Sister-Dear? What are you going to do? Shoot us?”

Celestia hand tightened on her weapon. “I was thinking about it.”

“Were you?” Nightmare-Moon continued to smile. “You must have fought your way through all of our minions to get here. You must be running low on ammo by now.”

“Sure, I’ve got maybe half a mag. Still need only one to take you down.”

“Really now, Sister-Dear? You would shoot us where we stand? Which happens to be right in front of your beloved?”

“Uh, we’re not actually-” Wolfsheim began, only to be ignored.

“He’s bullet proof.” Celestia said with a smile. Nightmare-Moon’s faltered slightly.

“Well, yes I technically am bullet proof.” Wolfsheim said. “But it’ll still hurt-”

He was cut off as Celestia opened up on Nightmare-Moon, who dodged to the side. Wolfsheim yelled out.

“Son of a bitch! What did I just tell you?!”

Celestia began walking backwards and Nightmare-Moon took cover behind a conveniently placed slab of stone. Nightmare-Moon was right; she was very low on ammo. Perhaps she could run back and find a weapon on one of the many henchpersons she had slayed.

Before she could though, a metal wall suddenly slid down over the hole where the door used to be with a resounding crash. Celestia looked over her shoulder in shock, which gave Nightmare-Moon enough time to get up.

“In retrospect, perhaps we should have done that earlier.” Nightmare-Moon said.

Celestia spun back around and pointed her rifle at her fallen sister. Surprisingly, or not given her believed state of sanity, Nightmare-Moon laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Celestia asked. “What makes you think I won’t shoot you right now?”

“Honor, Sister-Dear.” Nightmare-Moon said simply as she brandished a sword. “Single-combat, no guns.”

As if to show she was willing to play fair, Nightmare-Moon reached into her belt and withdrew her pistol. She ejected the magazine and tossed to weapon aside.

Frowning, Celestia pointed her rifle up and to the side, holding it by the pistol grip as she shot out the last two rounds. Tossing the weapon away, Celestia moved to take off her harness and vest.

As the equipment came away, Nightmare-Moon leapt through the air, intent on cutting Celestia in two. The sun goddess managed to dodge away, her sister’s blade only scoring a cut on the floor below, throwing up a shower of sparks as well.

Celestia ducked as Nightmare-Moon took a swipe at her head and punched the fallen goddess in the stomach. The breath rushed from Nightmare-Moon’s lungs in a low ‘woof’ and she crumpled to the floor.

Meanwhile, Wolfsheim had discovered a positive side to having been shot. It would seem that on of Celestia’s bullets had hit the manacle that had been keeping his left arm pinned.

Taking advantage of this, he pulled his left arm free and quickly undid the manacle holding his right arm. However, he had neglected thoroughly think through this, as there was nothing between his feet and the ground. Granted it was just a two-foot drop, but still.

Wolfsheim picked himself up and quickly tended to his manacled legs. Meanwhile, Celestia was still dodging Nightmare-Moon, who was hell-bent on removing her head from her shoulders.

As Celestia managed to get Nightmare-Moon to get her sword stuck in a table, she head Wolfsheim shout to her.

“Celestia, catch!”

She turned her head and managed to snag out of the air the blade Wolfsheim had tossed.

“Thanks!” Celestia called back.

Wolfsheim nodded. “And now to take back my cane.” he said to himself, turning towards the table that held said object.

“Stay out of this!” Nightmare-Moon shouted as she wrenched her sword free. A burst of magic suddenly shot out from her horn and flew towards Wolfsheim. The magic formed itself into black chains that glowed with a dark-blue light, which caught Wolfsheim and slammed him back into the obelisk, quickly wrapping around him.

“But I’m not into bondage!” cried Wolfsheim.

“Quiet!” barked Nightmare-Moon as she turned her gaze back to Celestia. “This is just between us and our sister.”

“Why, Sister?” Celestia growled as she and Nightmare-Moon slowly circled each other. “Why all of this?”

“Lover’s Quarrel.” Nightmare-Moon said as her horn and eyes began to glow with power.

“With who?” Celestia demanded as her horn and eyes began to glow as well.

“Everyone.”

“Everyone?”

“Eve-ry-one!” Nightmare-Moon shouted as the glow of power spread to her right arm. “They loved you and your precious Sun so much they had none left for us and our beloved Moon!”

“That’s insane!” Celestia counter as her magic too went down her arm.

“Is it? Is it?” Nightmare-Moon was practically doming at the mouth as dark energy crackled over her hand and sword. “IS IT?”

She leapt through the air, bringing her blade in an overhead slash down on Celestia. However, the sun goddess managed to charge her own weapon in time to bring it up to block her sister’s blade. If she hadn’t mirrored her sister’s actions, the fallen princess’s blade would have likely cut her hers and her body in half. Instead, the two weapons met with a resounding clash and burst of magical lightning.

Celestia shoved Nightmare-Moon back and out of the blade lock. She stumbled slightly and came back at Celestia with rage born of a thousand year imprisonment.

Blades met and disengaged with blasts of power as the two living goddesses battled. The slashed, stabbed, hacked, and many other associated words, soon panting under the strain of keeping up their magic.

“What’s the matter, getting tired?” Nightmare-Moon asked as the two blades became locked again and hers and Celestia’s faces were inches apart.

“Hardly.” Celestia snarled.

Nightmare-Moon face suddenly twisted from snarling to grinning madly. “Have we ever told you how attractive you look went you’re straining yourself?”

That threw Celestia for a moment, but she quickly shook it off and struggled against Nightmare-Moon’s strength. The two were an even match and Celestia soon disengaged from the blade lock, unable to take having her fallen sister’s grinning visage so close.

The two began slowly circling each other. Celestia had a grim look on her face while Nightmare-Moon was still grinning madly. It was really starting to get to Celestia now, that grin. It seemed as though her sister had suddenly snapped, her mind no longer able to take the strain.

And it suddenly occurred to Celestia that this was her fault. She’d driven her sister to madness, not by banishing her, but by fighting against her now, like this.

Oh Luna, what is going through your mind right now? It’s me, isn’t it? I never stormed a castle for you, even if there was no castle to storm. I’m so sorry Lulu, so sorry.

“I’m sorry.” Celestia said aloud.

“About what, Sister-Dear?”

Celestia shook her head sadly. “It’s my fault, I did this to you.”

“Then perhaps you can make up for it by doing other things to us. Mmm, hot, sexy things, yes?” Nightmare-Moon giggled. “Perhaps this really is a lover’s quarrel.”

“Luna, please.” Celestia said, hoping to snap her sister out of it. “Stop messing around like this. Come back to me.”

“We’re right here, Sister-Dear.” Nightmare-Moon giggled madly again. “Just say the word and we’re all yours.”

Celestia closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them, they were hard. “I want to talk to my sister.”

“You are.”

“No, I want to talk to my sister. I want to talk to Luna, not some hack parading around like she is her.”

The grin on Nightmare-Moon’s face faltered. “What?”

“You heard me. You are not my sister. You are nothing more than a whining bitch pretending to be Luna. Now, would you do us all a favor and go jump off a cliff so we can get on with our lives.”

Nightmare-Moon’s expression became filled with rage once more. “We are the true Princess of the Night! We are the rightful ruler of Equestria! And we are extremely annoyed at how attracted we are to you right now!”

“What?”

Nightmare-Moon yelled in frustration and clutched at her head. “Why must this be so difficult? Why can we not focus?” she glared at Celestia as her body glowed with power which all was siphoned into her horn.

“Why can’t you just die?!”

A beam of pure magical energy shot forth from Nightmare-Moon’s horn. Celestia countered with a beam of her own and the two met with a shock wave that threw both princesses on their backs.

Celestia staggered to her feet, coughing from the smoke and dust thrown up by the explosion. She looked over and saw Nightmare-Moon sauntering forward through the smoke, holding something in each hand.

“An old saying comes to mind. When in doubt,” Nightmare-Moon emerged from the smoke, the handle of a leather whip in each hand. For emphasis, she cracked one. “Whip it good.” her toothy grin was borderline lecherous.

Nightmare-Moon twirled the hips in her hands, lazily flicking them a few times. Her arm suddenly shot forward and Celestia felt a sharp pain on her thigh where the whip had struck her. She winced in pain as the other whip caught her abdomen.

And then one of the whips left a cruel welt on her flank, right on her cutie mark. Celestia cried out in pain.

Nightmare-Moon laughed as she saw her enemy succumbing to her onslaught. In just a minute or two, it would hurt for her to even move and from there this fight would be foal’s play.

As she brought the whip in her right hand down to strike her foe’s head, the moon goddess was grinning. When she suddenly couldn’t bring the whip back to her, the grin vanished.

Celestia, her expression hard, held the end of the whip tightly in her hand.

“My turn.” she said, pulling hard and fast.

Nightmare-Moon was pulled off her hooves and unceremoniously slammed into the floor, her weapons falling from her hands. Getting to her feet, she snarled at Celestia.

“Never could stand letting us have all the good toys could you?” Nightmare-Moon said, her eyes glowing again.

“Stop this, Sister. Stop fighting me; stop trying to justify this madness.”

“Madness?” asked Nightmare-Moon, a maniacal glint in her eyes. “You want madness?” the glow spread to her entire body. “Then we shall show you madness!”

Nightmare-Moon sprinted forward and delivered a magically charged right hook to Celestia’s jaw. The impact might have very well broken the sun goddess’s jaw had she not managed to block it with her arm. And even with the magic reinforcing her body, the punch still rattled her teeth.

Celestia quickly followed the block with a punch to Nightmare-Moon’s abdomen. The fallen princess gritted her teeth in pain, but struck back with all the force she could muster. Celestia took the hit on her shoulder and tried to ignore the pain.

The two continued to grapple and fight for another second or two before the strain of magic and adrenalin caught up with them again. Speed of perception and the speed of their limbs slowed and they each made a desperate struggle to gain to upper hand.

Celestia managed to spin Nightmare-Moon around and trap one of her arms using one arm while using the other to put the moon goddess on a chokehold. Nightmare-Moon struggled to draw breath and used her free arm to send an elbow into Celestia’s stomach. Celestia gasped in pain, but maintained her hold.

Nightmare-Moon abruptly changed tactics. Gripping the arm around her throat, Nightmare-Moon bent her body and lifted Celestia off her feet. The sun goddess was suddenly swung over her sister’s body and slammed into the stone floor.

Nightmare-Moon gasped and stumbled backwards, hand massaging her abused throat. Meanwhile, Celestia groaned and shakily got to her feet. She stumbled and braced herself with an arm on a table.

“Come on, that all you got?” Celestia said, panting. “How do you plan on subjugating all of Equestria when you can’t even beat me? Can you even call yourself a Princess of the Night when I’m beating you like this?” Celestia put all the contempt she could muster into the next word. “Pathetic.”

Nightmare-Moon’s growl was more animal than anything else. Despite her body’s complaints, she charged forward and tackled Celestia. They two went crashing backwards and slammed into the stone wall at the edge of Nightmare-Moon’s lair.

Celestia gasped out in pain as her spine struck the stone. Nightmare-Moon was over her, Celestia put up her arms to block her adversary’s as they pressed down on her. She was partway over the wall and Nightmare-Moon seemed intent on sending her over the side and into the seemingly endless abyss.

Their faces were inches apart and Celestia could see the pain and rage in Nightmare-Moon’s eyes.

“Afraid of heights, Sister-Dear?” Nightmare-Moon snarled. “Oh, we simply cannot wait until we’ve finished you, then we can go and tell all your loyal subjects the horrendous fate that had befallen their beloved princess. We shall enjoy going in to lewd detail of how there was fear in your eyes as you abandoned them. We shall then bring out your oh so precious student and when she screams we will rend her head from her body!” Nightmare-Moon pressed harder and Celestia felt herself slipping over the edge. “Die!”

“No.” Celestia said simply as she inclined her head.

Their horns, one white as snow the other blacker than night, touched. There was a spark of magic that surged between the two. Nightmare-Moon closed her eyes briefly as the magic surged through her and then snapped them open.

She blinked a few times and quietly said, “What? What is-? No. No! What are you-” she cried out in apparent pain. “Too far, too long, so close, cannot allow-” another cry of pain. “No we won’t let you, not anymore!” she cried out again. “Get away from me! Too far, can’t let you stop this! No, no, no, no! Stop this! Damn you! Damn you all! So close. Cannot-”

She screamed.

Her head fell.

“L-Luna?” Celestia said tentatively.

The head rose, the eyes glowing with red light.

“Assuming direct con- mmph? Mmmmmph!”

Whatever she was about to say was lost as Celestia got a hand loose and used it to bring Nightmare-Moon’s face to hers. Their lips met, silencing the moon goddess. The red glow faded and looked in shock at Celestia, whose eyes were closed in apparent bliss.

They slowly pulled apart as the dark mare raised her head. “Celestia?” she said in a soft, quiet voice. “What-”

She was cut off as Celestia’s fist slammed into her cheek. Unprepared, she was thrown off the sun goddess and landed on the floor.

Chuckling, Celestia got up and off the stone wall. “Sorry there, sis. Couldn’t take any chances.”

“You - you…. You hit me!”

Celestia chuckled again. “Sorry Luna. Like I said, had to be sure.”

Luna rubbed her cheek. “Be sure of what?”

Celestia shook her head. “I’m sure it’ll come back to you.”

“What will…?” Luna got a distant look in her eyes. “Oh, no.” she whispered.

Slowly, she got to her feet and looked at Celestia. “Did, did I… all that and…?”

She suddenly tackled Celestia, bawling like a foal. “Oh Tia! I’m sorry! I’m so, so sorry!” Luna buried her head in Celestia’s mane and continued to cry.

Celestia wrapped comforting arms around Luna. “It’s alright, everything’s fine.” she whispered softly. “All is well, little sister.”

“The things I did!” Luna blubbered. “The things I said!”

“You weren’t yourself.” Celestia reassured Luna.

“I could see everything, Tia, everything! I couldn’t do a thing about it!” Luna brought her head out of Celestia’s mane. “But you… you….” Luna trailed off as she looked into Celestia’s violet eyes. “You kissed me!”

Celestia laughed. “Perhaps I did. Teehee!”

Luna groaned and rested her head on Celestia’s shoulder. “Thank you. For saving me, not kissing me. I still have to process that.”

“Take your time.” Celestia said, smiling.

Everything was silent for a time before a voice shattered it.

“Hey Celestia and Luna, I’m real happy for you and I’m gonna let you finish, but Leia kissing Luke was the most awkward kiss of all time.”

Celestia and Luna looked over at the still-chained-to-an-obelisk Wolfsheim.

“Of all time!” he said pointedly. After a pause he added, “Oh, and can you let me down? I lost the feeling in several of my extremities a while ago.”

Luna and Celestia looked at each other and both grinned.

“Sorry, but we’re a tad busy at the moment. Perhaps later, alright?” Luna said as she and Celestia turned and started towards the door, arms around shoulders.

“You’re kidding right?” Wolfsheim asked, chuckling nervously.

“Ta-la, dear!” Celestia called over her shoulder as she and Luna walked out through the smoking hole that was the door, evidently blown open earlier by a blast of magic.

“But you are kidding?” Wolfsheim called after the two sisters. “Celestia? Luna? Hey? Hey!”

***********

Glados coughed and wheezed as she drug herself out of the fiery pits. Determination fueled her limbs. That and a thirst for vengeance.

“This. Isn’t. Over.”

***********

<b>THE END

-QUESTION MARK-</b>

WRITTEN, DIRECTED, AND PRODUCED BY

The Wraith Writer

Wolfsheim the Wraith Writer of Lore is an Original Character

All other characters are copyrighted to their respected owners.

Please to sue me

ShadowFire Productions

In association with myself

Presents

<b><u>The Wraith Writer of Equestria</b>

</u>

Later in the Royal Bedchambers

Wolfsheim laid on his side, an uneasy expression on his face. On the other side of the bed, Nightmare-Moon laid in a similar position. Each had their back to the other, neither speaking.

“Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere’s Tia!” shouted Celestia as she suddenly pooped up from underneath the covers between the two. Grabbing both other occupants of the bed, Celestia pulled them both close and giggled. “It’s good to be Princess.” she said, staring up as though at some unseen viewer.

“I feel violated.”

“Me too.”

…What?

Wolfsheim will return in:

The Wraith Writer of Who

(Or should that be whom?)