The next chapter will be really, really, REALLY long. Probably two parts, too. But...baby showers bore me.

The day of the baby shower had arrived. Pinkie had done a good job, putting up decorations and putting up all sorts of games. But mostly, they just sat and talked.

Most of the ponies from the bachelorette party were there, and most of the ponies from the bachelor party.

"Fluttershy, I insist that you open mine first!" quipped Rarity.

"Well, okay."

"I think I know what it's going to be," whispered Discord as Fluttershy tore apart the wrapping paper.

Sure enough, she pulled out a bunch of feetie pajamas, and all the girls squealed.

"Most of these would suit both boys and girls, but I made a few pink and blue, just in case."

A short hug followed, accompanied by another present from Rainbow Dash.

"My present is gonna be the coolest one, by far."

"Ooh, I'm excited."

She opened the tiny giftbox and pulled out a tiny slip of paper.

"A coupon?"

"Not just a coupon. That is a coupon for one free flight lesson from your loyal friend, Rainbow Dash!"

"What...?! That's the cheapest excuse for a present ah've ever seen in mah life!" protested Applejack.

"You got something better, farm girl?"

"Yeah, somethin' the baby can actually use."

She opened Applejack's present and found numerous jars of a mushy substance.

"That there baby food is made up of 99.9% apples. Tha' rest is sugar and water."

Rainbow Dash laughed so hard, she fell down on the floor, rolling over and crying that she was guffawing so hard.

"You'd think...that the baby would get sick of apples! Hahahaha!"

"This was the stuff ah was raised on. Apples 're good for ya', Dash."

"Hahahahah! Wow, and you called my present lame!"

"Naw, ah called yer present cheap!"

"Your face is cheap!"

"Rainbow!" Fluttershy yelled.

"She started it!"

"Look, I love both of your presents. They'll both be beneficial to the baby's growth."

They gave her a brief hug and moved on. The rest of the baby shower went on exactly like this, and they got a few sweet things by the end.

Discord was mostly hanging out by the punch bowl with the guys that showed up for most of the party.

When they got home, Discord struggled through the door, carrying a lot of baby stuff.

"So much...heavy!"

"Come on, honey. Just a few more steps."

Fluttershy directed him over to the coffee table, where he set the presents down and returned to his couch.

"We have such good friends. Our baby's going to grow up just fine."

"Yeah, he's gonna be pimped, come his birth date. When is that, by the way?"

"I'm not due until next month. But, you know, most babies are either born before or after their due date."

"Huh. I did not know that."

He reached for the remote, but found Fluttershy holding it in her hooves.

"Hey!"

"Discord, can I please watch this documentary on birth? It would really help me to get prepared for the big day."

"Oh, alright. How long is it?"

"About...two hours?" she smiled meekly at him.

"Man, I'm going to miss the big game!"

She pressed a few buttons on the space-agey device, and it recorded Discord's program for him.

"Wow! The wonders of technology never cease to amaze me."

A few minutes into the documentary, he was already bored and confused.

"Shortly before going into labor, most women experience an event called the bloody show."

Due to the graphic nature of the content shown, Discord ran to the bathroom to throw up. Fluttershy just leaned in closer and gathered more information.