Sulking through the Everfree forest at three o'clock in the morning Is not fun, especially when you just got your flank handed to you by a certain purple unicorn.  It wasn't even an Ursa Major!  I actually defeated an Ursa Major, but no one believes me. I kept saying "Check the bottom of the lake north of Manehatten if you want proof!" but noooooo, they were too busy with their rich people problems to deal with me. I mean, Why would somepony not believe "The Great and Powerful" Trixie? You don't just get that title for nothing, you know? But I guess it's hard to believe that you singlehoofedly saved all of Equestria  from a zombie pony outbreak when it was never documented. There was a parade in my honor for Celestia's sake! We lost the whole city of Marelanta. How the BUCK did nopony get all that down on paper?

Who cares? I'm too tired to complain anymore. I just wish I had a stable home, a family, and a steady income. but I guess I'll just keep going town to town trying to find a nice stallion to settle down with. I thought for sure somepony would like it if I acted full of myself and talked in the third person, I'll just go ahead and mark that off my list. But I do have to admit that I pulled it off really well. Maybe I should just have an annoying pony as a cutie mark instead of this stupid wand. What's the point of having a cutie mark that means you're good at magic when no pony will ever believe you, or even give you the chance to give them a good show.

I think I'm going to just lie down in the muck, leaves, and what I hope is mud, try to get some sleep, and "AHHH! What the BUCK was that!?" I swear to Luna I just saw something moving around in those bushes. Next Chapter: The Second Chapter in the Series Estimated time remaining: 5 Minutes