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I'll Kill You With My Tea Cup

by Cloud Hop
115 Dislikes, 22,021 Views
(5 stars with 1 vote)

Only a few hours after the Griffon Empire declared war on Equestria, Princess Celestia waved a white flag and asked for an audience with the Griffon Emperor. The Emperor thinks she's here to negotiate Equestria's surrender. He's wrong.

Teen
Complete

1 Chapter, 1,622 words: Estimated 7 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Apr 1st, 2015

Chrysalis Kidnaps Rainbow Dash For 10 Minutes

by Cloud Hop
92 Dislikes, 15,829 Views
(5 stars with 2 votes)

Chrysalis kidnaps Rainbow Dash and holds her for ransom. This same Rainbow Dash also happens to be engaged to the immensely powerful Alicorn Princess Twilight Sparkle. Chrysalis is not a very smart changeling.

Everyone
Complete
Comedy

2 Chapters, 3,710 words: Estimated 15 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Jul 8th, 2014
Last Update Jul 9th, 2014

Twilight Punches Flash Sentry

by Cloud Hop
141 Dislikes, 12,354 Views

Twilight punches Flash Sentry in the face. Several times, actually.

Dubious
Complete
Comedy
Sex

1 Chapter, 1,178 words: Estimated 5 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Apr 30th, 2014

One Last Trick

by Cloud Hop
30 Dislikes, 7,602 Views

I'm in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of orifices I didn't know I had. Why am I there? Why is Rainbow Dash sitting in the corner? Why is she crying?

Dubious
Incomplete
Romance
Sad
Drama

10 Chapters, 30,434 words: Estimated 2 Hours, 2 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Sep 12th, 2014
Last Update Aug 27th, 2016

Bastion

by Cloud Hop
14 Dislikes, 5,973 Views

Being Princess Celestia's personal guard is a gruelling, thankless job. However, when the Princess begins tutoring a small purple filly, Bastion finds himself on the receiving end of a much needed hug.

Everyone
Complete
Slice of Life

1 Chapter, 3,059 words: Estimated 13 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Mar 25th, 2015

Twilight gets drunk and ships Rainbow Dash with everything in the universe.

Everyone
Incomplete
Comedy
Slice of Life

4 Chapters, 19,587 words: Estimated 1 Hour, 19 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Jun 21st, 2013
Last Update Oct 21st, 2013

Em Dash

by Cloud Hop
8 Dislikes, 4,700 Views
(5 stars with 1 vote)

Rainbow Dash makes the mistake of showing Twilight her Daring Do fanfic, and gets lectured about the proper use of dashes. This is followed by the worst pun in the universe.

Everyone
Complete
Comedy
Slice of Life

1 Chapter, 1,514 words: Estimated 7 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Oct 16th, 2014

Twilight Buys A Toaster

by Cloud Hop
12 Dislikes, 4,810 Views

Twilight buys a toaster. It doesn't work very well. Unfortunately for Rainbow Dash, she happens to be in earshot--and trying to check out a Daring Do book. Rainbow Dash begins to question her life choices.

Everyone
Complete
Comedy
Slice of Life

1 Chapter, 1,010 words: Estimated 5 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Oct 26th, 2014

When I'm Gone

by Cloud Hop
13 Dislikes, 4,443 Views

What do we truly fear in death? Can an ageless alicorn keep a promise to her beloved? Can she remember who Rainbow Dash was?

Teen
Complete
Romance
Drama

1 Chapter, 4,342 words: Estimated 18 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Dec 30th, 2016

Tomb of the Fallen

by Cloud Hop
6 Dislikes, 3,411 Views

On the fourth day of the fourth month of every year, Equestria pays homage to its fallen heroes. As daylight sets on this solemn ceremony, the immortal sun bows before the soldiers who died for her, and asks a question for which there is no answer.

Teen
Complete
Sad
Drama

1 Chapter, 3,171 words: Estimated 13 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Nov 13th, 2017

Tʜᴇ Cᴀʟᴀᴍɪᴛʏ

by Cloud Hop
42 Dislikes, 4,183 Views

Chrysalis didn't invade Canterlot in a bid to take over Equestria. She attacked the city because she had nowhere else to run. Now, the nightmare chasing her has found its way to the Equestrian border. Can she warn the Princess before it's too late?

Teen
Complete
Dark

1 Chapter, 3,594 words: Estimated 15 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Oct 6th, 2016

Ponies Are Tiny Nuclear Reactors

by Cloud Hop
6 Dislikes, 3,258 Views

It turns out that ponies don't need to go to the bathroom because they run on cold fusion. Meanwhile, Maud Pie has found a bunch of glowing, green rocks. I wonder what they could be?

Everyone
Complete
Comedy

1 Chapter, 1,946 words: Estimated 8 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Jun 1st, 2015

The Unsung Hero

by Cloud Hop
5 Dislikes, 2,460 Views

Every day of his adult life, he has been fighting a monster he can't see, or taste, or touch. An evil that, if left unchecked, would ruin countless lives. A darkness that nopony else can ever know about. Until last Thursday happened.

Teen
Complete
Slice of Life
Sad
Dark

1 Chapter, 3,686 words: Estimated 15 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Aug 20th, 2014

Starvation

by Cloud Hop
5 Dislikes, 2,226 Views

There is no more love. There is no more queen. There are only the silent echoes of a dying hive, as a lonely changeling, cut off from the hivemind, ponders the fate that has befallen his brethren.

Teen
Complete
Tragedy
Sad

1 Chapter, 1,225 words: Estimated 5 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Nov 29th, 2014

Superdeterminism

by Cloud Hop
4 Dislikes, 1,208 Views

Equestria died long ago, but that didn't stop Princess Twilight. Then the whole universe died - that didn't stop her either.

Teen
Complete
Sad
Dark
Sci-Fi

1 Chapter, 1,591 words: Estimated 7 Minutes to read: Cached
Published Dec 18th, 2019

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