"Hey, Twilight, are we going to check out the Archives today?" asked a tall dark purple unicorn. The Library had a cozy feel to it, the two unicorns sitting at the kitchen table eating a breakfast of hay pancakes, shredded fried potatoes, apple juice for Amethyst and dark coffee for Twilight. Amethyst had made the chair herself, having had to craft certain furnishings large enough to suit her size, as she stood considerably taller than most mares. The dark purple mare was quite excited to be paying the Archives a visit today, so much so that she was practically bouncing like Pinkie Pie.

"Yeah, Ammy, that's right! I can't wait to see your reaction! Starswirl the Bearded was the greatest unicorn in history -- smarter than ME, even!" Twilight giggled. It had only been recently that she had been informed by a future version of herself that time travel was indeed possible -- and that the location of the spell was in the Starswirl the Bearded Wing of the Canterlot Royal Archives. After some initial panic over an imagined terror to occur on the following Tuesday, an event which was ultimately trivial in its consequence, though the preparations for it were chaotic, to put it mildly, Twilight had promised her housemate that they were going to pay the Archives a visit.

Today was that day.

Amethyst's two foals, EJ and Stephanie were at school -- and in fact, today was Stephanie's second week of school -- and would be staying the night at Rarity's boutique. This was in preparation for the trip to Canterlot by train for the lavender librarian and her assistant. Amethyst had taken not only to living with Twilight, but working as an assistant librarian, in charge of acquisitions, circulation, imposing overdue fines and replacement book fees if needed, as well as assisting in the duties of housekeeping. She also served as librarian in Twilight's absence when not accompanying her as she had previous library experience as a human, though such experience was more than 25 years in the past. Amethyst had taken a liking to Owlowiscious, though sometimes the owl could be a little pesky.

The librarian and her unicorn assistant finished eating and worked in tandem to wash, dry, and put away the dishes and cooking utensils, silverware, and the griddle used to make the pancakes.

"I appreciate you making the pancakes, Ammy, they were delicious!"

"Sure thing, Twi. With Spike teaching me how to make them, it's gotten pretty easy for me to cook them properly."

"Ammy, make a checklist -- I need to make sure we have everything we need for this trip," Twilight stated optimistically.

"You usually have Spike make checklists for you, Twilight," she protested.

"I prefer your hoofwriting skills to Spike's writing -- and anyway, he's over at Carousel Boutique helping Rarity with her needs. When we leave, I will place a "closed for today" sign on the door. This trip to Canterlot will also allow me to meet with our teacher as well. You've been slacking with your studies, Ammy -- you should never stop learning magic!"

"Okay, Twi, go ahead with the checklist," the dark purple unicorn stated, boredom dripping from her words. She readied a pen and a pad of paper with her telekinesis.

"Ammy, how many times must I tell you? Use ink and parchment! Why do you insist on using those human writing supplies?" the librarian asked in exasperation.

"Because this is easier for me to use, Twi. Ink and parchment is so Dark Ages for me -- and to be honest, I still haven't learned the fine telekinetic control needed to use a quill with ink on parchment without puncturing the parchment nearly every time I have tried using it. So I offered a compromise -- let me use human writing materials, it's what I've been accustomed to for more than four decades. PLEASE."

The lavender unicorn sighed in resignation. "Okay, fine, be that way. First item on the checklist: make checklist."

"Twi, that's redundant! First item ignored. Okay, Twi, second item?" Amethyst grinned. She had a tendency to enjoy frustrating her housemate and sometimes took it a little too far.

"Ammy! Just write it down, okay? You throw my thought process off every time you do that!" she exclaimed as her exasperation seemed to increase. The dark purple unicorn made some scratching noises with the pen on the paper, though it wasn't the first item Twilight had stated. "Second item: saddlebags. Third item: sixty bits for two round-trip tickets to Canterlot."

"We're going to need more bits for food and lodging if we plan to stay the night in Canterlot," Amethyst offered.

"Tell me, Ammy -- do you have extra bits to cover those expenses?" asked Twilight, giving her housemate an accusatory look. The dark purple unicorn offered a sheepish smile. "So I guess that means you don't, do you. You can't expect me to keep covering all the expenses, Ammy!" she exclaimed, her exasperation becoming even more evident.

"Okay, Twi, I guess I'll starve, and we'll sleep in the Castle. Perhaps Princess Celestia will cover us for a night, and maybe give us some free food as well. Surely your status as her favorite student will allow you to pull some strings with her for the both of us, n'est-ce pas?"

"Ammy, you test my patience! I might just as well call off this trip if you're going to be like that!" the librarian nearly shouted. Her exasperation had hit the breaking point.

"Okay, sorry, sorry, Twi! Geez, I was only pulling your leg!" Amethyst giggled. After having successfully derailed Twilight's train of thought, the idea of a checklist was discarded along with a little of her pride.

"Next time I'll have Spike make the checklist for me. Honestly, Ammy, I can't understand why you have to be so difficult!"

"There are certain things I don't enjoy doing, Twilight, and making checklists of obvious needs is near the top of my list, along with your tendency to obsess over being late and your anxiety over failing easy tests," she said, almost dismissively.

"Those tests are NOT EASY!!" the lavender unicorn shouted, her exasperation returning full force. Amethyst giggled almost uncontrollably at Twilight's outburst.

"Oh, come on, Twi, you've either aced or nearly aced every test you've ever taken! And even if you failed, they're NOT gonna send you back to Magic Kindergarten! They wouldn't DARE do that to YOU!" she exclaimed, laughing heartily. The librarian started smiling now at her housemate's flattery, joining her in the laughter.

"Yeah, you're right about that, Ammy! I suppose I shouldn't worry so much. But we DO need to make our preparations for this trip -- you don't want to be late for the train, you know."

"You know, other than basic toiletries and a few books to occupy our time on the train, I can't really think of anything else we might need," observed Amethyst.

"I'll be taking some parchment, ink, and a few quills with me as well. I suggest you do the same."

"If I take any writing materials, it's gonna be pens and my paper tablet," the dark purple unicorn responded.

"Whatever. Princess Luna might accept such novelties, but I'm sure Celestia is less enthusiastic about your use of human supplies. I still don't get why you hold onto certain human characteristics and not others, Ammy."

"Well, Twi, it's just that even though I've been a unicorn in one form or another for more than seven years, there are some ... things I might hold over from my time as a human as opposed to how ponies do those things. I suppose I should practice more with an ink quill and parchment, but it's sooo much easier for me to use pen on paper." After making the necessary preparations, Twilight and Amethyst loaded their saddlebags and left the Library. The librarian hung a "closed" sign on the door and locked it up as they left, trotting at a leisurely pace to the train station.

"Ammy, you did pack some food in your saddlebags, I hope," Twilight mused.

"Yeah, I got bread, peanut butter, a dull knife, a couple of bananas, a few apples, some carrots..." the dark purple unicorn stated as her words trailed off.

"Okay, good. That's enough for both of us, right?"

"Please tell me you packed food in your saddlebags as well, Twi," Amethyst said expectantly.

"That's why I told you to make a checklist, Ammy!" the flabbergasted librarian exclaimed. Her housemate giggled at the outburst again.

"Yeah, Twi, I packed enough food for both of us!" she chuckled. "Honestly, Twi, you can be so gullible at times."

"Stop doing that to me! I hate it when you do that!"

"And I thought I was wound up too tight!" the dark purple mare said through her laughter. "You need to loosen up, Twi!"

"Yeah, Twiley, you need to loosen up!" exclaimed a cyan pegasus who had spotted the two unicorns trotting along. Rainbow Dash hovered and flew lazy circles around the pair. "What'cha doing?"

"We're heading to Canterlot today, Rainbow -- Twilight's showing me the Archives today!" Amethyst said with a little excitement in her voice.

"Just a bunch of dumb books I'm not interested in," the pegasus grumbled. "What's so exciting about that?"

"We're going to check out the Starswirl the Bearded Wing! Twilight's future self told of a time-travel spell! I want to see if I can perform that spell as well!" the purple mare exclaimed, her excitement barely contained.

"Well, good for you, Ammy. Let me know how it turns out!" Rainbow grinned. "By the way, if you're taking the train, you might wanna pick up the pace. The train's gonna be here in about ten minutes."

"Oh my gosh! We've got to hurry, Ammy! We can't be late for the train!" the librarian exclaimed in her anxiety and started galloping as quickly as she could towards the train station. Amethyst gave a quick shrug and a sheepish smile to the pegasus, who grinned broadly.

"Yeah, she's always been like that, hasn't she, Ammy?" Rainbow chuckled.

"I can't break her out of it, Rainbow -- Celestia knows I've tried," the unicorn said with some exasperation. "Seeya later, I gotta run! Bye!"

Amethyst's taller stature and longer legs allowed her to gallop considerably faster than Twilight so the dark purple unicorn caught up with her housemate in fairly short order as the train blew its whistle on approach to the station. The two made it to the ticket counter and purchased their tickets, then boarded the train, taking seats in the first passenger coach. Twilight was winded from the sprint.

"You know, Twi, I think you might need to get outside and run a bit more frequently. You spend too much time studying!" her housemate chuckled.

"Ammy ... you're taller than ... me ... and ... YOU ... need to ... study MORE!" the librarian huffed as she slowly regained her normal breathing and heart rate.

"Whatever, Twi," she responded dismissively.

"What if they send YOU back to Magic Kindergarten?" Twilight asked, grinning.

"HAH! They wouldn't DARE!" she nearly shouted, laughing heartily. Twilight giggled softly.

"You never knoooow," she said in a sing-song voice.

"They'd better not!" Amethyst pouted, a look of worry coloring her features. The librarian giggled a little more loudly.

"Gullibility is a double-edged sword, Ammy!" she chuckled. "You have done almost as well as me on those magic tests, and to be honest, you've actually outscored me on some of them! I still don't know how you do that!"

"If there's a subject I'm truly fascinated with, I do my best to understand it to the best of my knowledge -- and with magic, my fascination is boundless, so it is my wish to learn as much as I can. Some of those tomes can be so dry, the technical details so boring that it dulls my excitement."

"Well, I'm not sure how well you know Starswirl's writings -- from what I've been able to gather, his work has a tendency to be extremely detail oriented. There's a possibility that it might be too much for you to comprehend," the lavender mare explained.

"If it involves time travel, you can bet your last bit that I would be willing to learn everything there is to know on the subject -- you got so wrapped up in trying to get your future self to answer your questions that she ran out of time to warn you about --"

"Don't remind me, Ammy. If I had known better, I would have kept my mouth shut when she was trying to explain the danger to me in full detail." Amethyst giggled softly as Twilight wore a somewhat pained expression.

"Well, nothing too terribly bad came of it, so no harm, no foul."

"Yeah, but don't bring it up again, okay? I'd rather forget about that event."

"Sure thing, Twi," Amethyst chuckled. "I still like the outfit she wore, though. I think you look pretty cool in latex," she said slyly. Twilight blushed a bit at that.

"Ammy! Please! I don't want you thinking about me like that!" the lavender mare exclaimed, exasperation making a quick return once again as her blush deepened a little.

"I'm going to withhold my comment," the dark purple mare said, giving a big toothy grin.

"Whatever," Twilight said dismissively, taking a book from her saddlebags. She started reading, silently mouthing the words to herself, a habit which annoyed her housemate to no end, which is why she did so. The two of them seemed to take enjoyment in pestering each other. Amethyst took a book from her saddlebags and sat in a different section of the coach so as not to be disturbed by Twilight's reading. The lavender mare made her way over to the bench her housemate had taken and sat next to her, continuing to read her book and mouth the words she was reading. Amethyst grimaced, scrunching her face in order to display her contempt for Twilight's very annoying behavior. She chose another bench to get away from the librarian again, who promptly followed her again.

"Twi, you need to stop doing that -- I don't know how long the train ride is going to take this time, but if you keep doing that --"

"What are you going to do?" Twilight asked, giving her best big toothy grin.

"I will sing your least favorite of my human songs for you, one which will get stuck in your head for the rest of the day," she replied flatly.

"No! Not the "Baby Monkey" song!" Twilight gasped.

"So stop mouthing the words you're reading, Twi, and stop following me when I'm trying to read by myself. There's no reason why you should be so fascinated with my literary choices," the purple mare said, a little exasperation in her voice.

"Okay, Ammy," the librarian giggled, satisfied by her success in annoying her housemate.

The remainder of the train ride continued uneventfully as the two unicorns read in silence, only breaking for lunch and Twilight's attempts to get Amethyst to understand some of the finer points of casting multiple spells simultaneously. The purple mare found the explanation to be a bit too technical.

"Speak Equish for once instead of talking shop, would ya please?" Amethyst asked in exasperation.

"How are you going to be able to cast those spells if you don't have a firm understanding of the basics? That should be Equish enough for you, Ammy! You have so much potential, it's a shame to see you squandering it like this! Practical application of your knowledge is needed to fully realize the maximum potential of your gift!" the librarian exclaimed, nearly flabbergasted by her housemate's seeming lack of interest.

"Twi, the minutiae of those spells make my brain hurt. It's going to take more time for me to fully comprehend it."

The train started slowing down as it approached Canterlot, the conductor blowing the whistle as it came to a full stop. The two unicorns departed the train and made their way to the front gate of the Castle. The Royal Guardsponies standing at the gate allowed them in upon recognizing Twilight and Amethyst, who saluted the guards. One of them broke a smile upon seeing the dark purple mare salute him, the other guard returning a salute to her.

"Ammy, you don't need to do that," Twilight stated.

"Sorry, Twi, force of habit," her housemate responded.

The pair made their way into the Castle and eventually met up with Princess Celestia, who graciously welcomed them.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of your surprising visit?" asked the Sun Goddess as she smiled warmly. "Twilight, you usually give me advance notice of any trips you make, especially to visit me! Amethyst, is there a particular reason you have chosen to accompany my most faithful student?"

"Twilight has offered to show me the Royal Archives, your Majesty," the purple mare stated, a hint of apprehension in her voice. Over the past few years of living in Ponyville, Amethyst had made her share of mistakes which tested the patience of her housemate's mentor and was trying to work her way back into Celestia's good graces. She had to be extra careful not to anger the Sun Goddess.

"The Royal Archives, then. Twilight, I trust you will keep a close eye on Amethyst to make sure she doesn't get into any trouble. She caused quite a bit of trouble the last time she discovered a new spell and tried it without considering the consequences of casting that spell."

"Your Majesty, I am truly sorry about that event -- I was trying to find a way of accelerating the heating of water to get it to boil faster. I had no idea that it would result in concussive force of that magnitude," the purple mare offered.

"We took what you learned and used it as an offensive spell, so at the very least, you did something productive, even if it did result in considerable damage to Twilight's kitchen," stated Celestia.

"Nothing a little magic couldn't fix, Ammy," Twilight chuckled. "I was going to try that spell, but you beat me to it!"

"It kinda blew up in my face, though," Amethyst sighed.

"I suspect there's another reason for you wanting to visit the Archives again, Amethyst?"

"Twilight was visited by a future version of herself, who told her something about Starswirl's work -- I wanted to visit that wing of the Archives to get a better understanding of his writings. Perhaps I will develop the same level of admiration for him that Twilight has for him."

"I would think that should have happened by now -- if you had been going about your studies as diligently as Twilight. It would appear you are trying to get caught up. I certainly hope this tour of the Archives inspires you to redouble your efforts to study. Keep in mind that you are still on thin ice with me, Amethyst, and I need to see some improvement, otherwise I will have to confine you to the Castle until such time as I feel you are worthy of returning to Ponyville. I see within you great potential, every bit as great as Twilight's, and yet you disappoint me by engaging in frivolous activities and showing irresponsible behavior at times."

"I apologize, your Majesty," the dark purple unicorn stated with great reverence, bowing deeply before the regal Alicorn.

"Your apology is accepted, Amethyst. Please try not to disappoint me further -- there is a specific reason I assigned you to stay with Twilight. She has informed me of certain behavioral characteristics you display which displease her. Please try to correct that behavior, as I find such treatment of my favorite student rather distasteful."

"I humbly apologize, your Majesty. I will try to control myself better. Twilight, I'm sorry for annoying you," she said, virtually prostrating herself before the Princess.

"Amethyst, please rise. I accept your apology," Celestia stated.

"I accept your apology as well, Ammy," said Twilight.

"Amethyst, I would like to have some words with my student. Please make your way to the dining hall, where some food will be brought to you."

"Thank you, your Majesty," the purple mare stated as she saluted the Princess and then left the throne room. She was escorted to the dining hall by another guardspony.

"Twilight, I want you to make sure she doesn't try to cast a time travel spell -- things will end badly for her if she does."

"Yes, Princess. I know that such a spell is beyond her capabilities, so even if she tries to cast it, it won't work for her," the unicorn grinned.

"I don't want to take any chances, Twilight. For my sake, please keep her away from such a spell."

"Yes, Princess."

"So how are the foals doing? Last I heard, EJ got his cutie mark!" Celestia grinned.

"That was about a month ago -- I was so worried for Pound Cake! But EJ managed to save his life!"

"That sword-making talent of his has already proven useful. He will be quite powerful in the future," Celestia mused.

"I'm just amazed he was able to defeat so many timber wolves! Pound Cake told me about EJ using his magic to make lots of swords and chase off the timber wolves, but ended up turning them into firewood. EJ was so happy to get his cutie mark!"

"His seventh birthday is coming up pretty soon -- I suspect Pinkie Pie is giving him a big party for the occasion?"

"Pinkie Pie has already thrown him an "I got my cutie mark" party, an "I found my lost baseball" party, an "I finally got my front teeth" party --"

"I keep forgetting that she has a tendency to throw parties for just about any reason," Celestia mused. "I believe we have kept your housemate waiting long enough. You should join her for dinner before heading down to the Archives."

"Yes, Princess. I thank you for your hospitality and your generosity."

"It is my pleasure, Twilight. When the two of you are finished touring the Archives, I would like for you to sleep with me in my bedchamber."

Twilight blushed very slightly, but nodded her head in response to her mentor's request. The two nuzzled each other lightly before Twilight left the throne room to make her way to the dining hall where she met up with Amethyst. The dark purple unicorn had a fairly large appetite and had become a little chubby over the three years or so she had been living with the librarian, though she was still able to gallop faster. Twilight had chided her about weight, but had noticed some of the stallions eyeing the purple unicorn with a little more admiration than was necessary.

"So, did Princess Celestia tell you to watch me like a hawk?" Amethyst grinned.

"How did you know?" asked Twilight, a look of surprise on her face.

"She always tells you that, Twi. Relax, I'm not gonna do anything," the purple mare said in an unconvincing attempt to reassure her housemate.

"You have told me SO many times about your fascination with time travel that I don't trust you!" exclaimed the lavender mare, exasperation oozing from her words.

"Okay, okay. I promise you I won't do anything bad."

"You'd better not!"

The two unicorns finished eating and then Amethyst followed Twilight as she led the way to the Archives. The extensive collections which comprised the Archives occupied a substantial portion of an entire floor of the castle, two levels below the throne room. The collections were divided into certain sections, though the more famous scholars had entire wings devoted to their teachings. Clover the Clever had a wing devoted to her writings, and that was the one the two unicorns had visited previously. Today was Starswirl's turn.

"Wow, Twilight, I had no idea he was this prolific!" Amethyst exclaimed, her mouth agape at the vast collection.

"Well, it's not just his writings, but those of other scholars who devoted themselves to his teachings. There's quite a lot of material here, Ammy -- not just tomes and scrolls, but certain memorabilia as well. The hat and cape are not originals, but replicas of what he wore. And here's a sculpture of him to give you an idea of what he looked like," the lavender mare said with great reverence, pointing a hoof at the statue.

"What, his statue is not out in the Royal Gardens?"

"Actually, yes -- Starswirl was so impressive he inspired sculptors to craft not one but two statues of him. One for the Archives and one for the Gardens."

Amethyst used the distraction to pull a tome from one of the shelves and started telekinetically flipping through the pages. As fate would have it, this particular book contained a time travel spell and Starswirl's observation regarding it.

"Corporeal temporal displacement is not dissimilar to standard teleportation, though the molecular dispersion required to transport a corporeal entity with regard to temporal stasis must be kept in a constant state of flux until the displacement has been completed. Failure to do so may result in complete disintegration of the molecular structure of the corporeal entity, an event which could best be described as catastrophic."

Instructions on how to cast the spell were listed as well, despite the ominous warning which preceded it.

"Amethyst, which book did you take? Let me see that," Twilight stated with great concern. Amethyst lit her horn in preparation to cast the spell.

"Ammy? What are you doing?" asked the lavender mare as her concern turned to exasperation. The purple mare created a rune circle and recited the words to the spell, her horn glowing a bright pale blue.

"STOP! AMMY! STOP!!"

The dark purple unicorn vanished.

----------------------------------

Amethyst blinked a few times after the spell had been completed. Twilight appeared to vanish, but other than that, the purple mare didn't notice any changes having occurred.

"Twi? Where did you go?" Amethyst asked hesitantly. She trotted around the Archives, searching for the librarian but was unable to locate her. "If you're playing hide and seek, you'd better come out now -- I'm getting tired, it's getting late, and I need to get some sleep. C'mon, Twi, this isn't funny anymore."

The purple mare continued to trot around the Archives, searching the stacks and each wing until she had covered virtually every square inch of the library, spending nearly two hours doing so before finally giving up and leaving. As she headed up the stairs to find Princess Celestia in an attempt to locate her housemate, she was met by Shining Armor.

"Hey, Shiny, I thought you and your wife were in the Crystal Empire," the purple mare mused.

"Um ... who are you? I'm not married," the Royal Guard Captain stated with some confusion.

"What are you talking about? You married Princess Cadance more than three years ago!"

"Well, I am rather taken by her, and we have dated a few times, but I haven't married her ... at least, not yet anyway! But you didn't answer my earlier question -- who are you? I've never seen you before. How did you get into the Castle?"

"My apologies, Shining. My name is Amethyst Shadow, I am your sister's housemate at the Ponyville Library. We came here earlier to check out the Royal Archives."

"My sister has a suite here at the Castle -- housemate? Ponyville Library? How do you know about me? I'd better take you to the Princess. Follow me, please,"

The Royal Guard Captain led Amethyst toward the throne room, the two trotting relatively slowly.

"I lost track of Twilight while I was in the Archives -- you haven't seen her around, have you?"

"We just finished lunch a little while ago -- Twiley then went to meet with Celestia. Can you tell me a little about yourself and how it is that you know my sister so well?"

The purple mare described in summary a little about her origin and how it came to be that she and the librarian became housemates and some of the events that had occurred since then. Shining seemed to tune her out as they made their way to the throne room.

"Here we are. Wait a moment, please." The Royal Guard Captain had a word with one of the guardsponies at the massive double doors leading into the throne room. The guard entered the room, announced Amethyst's presence to the Princess and returned to address the purple mare.

"You may enter, Amethyst Shadow," the guard stated flatly. "Please be respectful of Her Majesty."

Upon entering the throne room, the purple mare spotted her housemate, standing close to the Sun Goddess.

"There you are! You had me worried! Next time you decide to take off like that, please let me know beforehoof, please."

"Umm ... Do I know you?" the librarian asked, mirroring her brother's confusion.

"Twi, are you playing a game with me? Of course you know me! I'm Ammy, your housemate!" she giggled.

"I've never seen you before," the librarian stated hesitantly. "And please don't call me Twi -- my name is Twilight Sparkle, but you may call me Twilight if you want to keep it short. Your name is Amethyst Shadow? What do you mean you're my housemate?"

"Hmm. We were in the Royal Archives in the Starswirl the Bearded Wing -- I remember taking a book off one of the shelves and casting a time travel spell. Looks like it worked -- but I must have traveled further back in time than I thought," the purple mare mused.

"What were you doing in the archives?" the Princess asked, a hint of exasperation in her voice. "Where did you come from? Who are you? Who let you into the archives in the first place?"

"You did, your Majesty -- but apparently, my time travel has taken me to a point before we ever met. My apologies, your Majesty. Would you like for me to give you my whole story? I think you might find it rather fascinating."

"You mean time travel is possible?" asked Twilight very excitedly. "Starswirl wrote about it, but I didn't think it was possible! You're amazing!"

"Amethyst, you have surprised me with this magical ability of yours, though I am curious to know the circumstances which possessed you to cast the spell in the first place," Celestia mused. "Since you have stated a willingness to explain your story, I would appreciate all the details, starting from the beginning."

"If I may have some water brought to me, your Majesty, I would appreciate it greatly. My story is a very long one, and it starts like this -- originally, I was a human -- Homo sapiens -- but that was about eight years ago or so," the purple mare stated flatly. She waited to see what reaction this would get from the Princess and her student. The Princess raised an eyebrow at the mention, but Twilight was agog.

"You mean you came from another world?"

"Yes, I did -- it was Princess Celestia who teleported me from my home world to this one." At this mention, the Alicorn nearly gasped in surprise.

"I find that hard to believe, Amethyst -- I have no idea why I would have done such a thing."

"You chose to help me as I had lost everything that had given my life meaning up to that point because I had nothing left of my identity as a human. I was in a copy of Twilight's body at the time and you transformed me into the pony I am today, save for the fact that I am about 50 pounds heavier now than I was immediately after being transformed."

"I don't recall doing that," the Alicorn mused.

"That's because it occurred in the future, most likely in an alternate universe."

"You were in a copy of MY BODY?!" the lavender mare exclaimed in shock.

"Yes, Twilight -- one night before I went to bed as a human, I had made a wish to experience what it would be like to be Twilight Sparkle. I woke up the following morning to find myself transformed into YOU!" Amethyst giggled.

"What was that like? What was it like being a human?" asked Twilight.

"Well, being human had certain advantages -- namely, being able to walk upright on two legs, being able to grab, hold, and throw things with hands, being tall ... but being a unicorn allows me to do quite a few more things than I was able to do as a human, the ability to wield magic being the best advantage."

An awkward silence fell upon the room, so Amethyst resumed telling her story. "Well, when I woke up as Twilight, I was initially thrilled, believe it or not. It took a little while for me to adjust to my new stature, learning how to walk on all fours -- and it took awhile for my wife to adjust to my new form, although she did not like it at all. I used my magic to fix certain things around the house that needed repairs or replacement and also used magic to repair and enchant my automobile."

"Wait -- you said -- your wife?" asked the lavender mare, expressing disbelief. "What's an automobile?"

"Truthfully, as a human, I was in a male body. An automobile is a sort of carriage which moves on it's own power, able to carry multiple passengers at a relatively high rate of speed across great distances. My home country had an expansive network of highways, streets, and roads which spanned the length and width of the nation."

"Sounds fascinating," the Princess mused. "Please proceed with your story, Amethyst."

"I can't believe you -- a mare -- were in a MALE body!"

"It's true. But I haven't been in a male body for about eight years or so. But I digress. After fixing things around the house, I decided to have breakfast -- but something terrible happened. My wife had a couple of grandchildren living with us, and the youngest one mistook me for a dog. She climbed onto my back in an attempt to ride me like a horse, but lost her balance and snapped my horn off." Twilight gasped as Celestia expressed surprise by opening her eyes real wide. "So I had my wife grab the broken horn piece out of her granddaughter's hands and I urged her to place it on my head in the spot where it had broken off. I concentrated as hard as I could to force magic into it to try to mend it, but it didn't work. She tried to bond it back on with an epoxy resin, and even though the bond was strong enough to keep my horn in place, I was unable to focus magic through it because the natural molecular bond had been broken."

"So what happened then?" Twilight asked.

"For some reason or other, I decided that my magically enchanted vehicle might have been able to help me, though I wasn't sure how it could, but in an attempt to get the keys to the vehicle, I fell down the stairs and broke my right hind leg, fracturing in three places. My wife had to help me out to the car, which healed my broken leg. The inspiration to have the car restore my horn hit me, but when the car tried to do that, it went into safe mode and refused to cast any more magic. The only way to reset the safe mode was to turn the car off and use magic on it from outside the vehicle, but since I had lost my ability to use magic, I couldn't reset the vehicle. Worse still was the fact that I still owed money on the car to the dealership where I had bought it, and as a result of losing my human job, not being able to get money, I ended up losing the car."

"Who took it from you?" asked Twilight. "How did you feel about it?"

"The dealership I had bought the car from send a repossession agent to take it away. I felt as though a piece of me had died at that point."

"That's terrible! I'm so sorry!"

"Well, that wasn't the worst of it, not by any stretch. Eventually my wife got sick of me crying myself to sleep every night -- at one point making me sleep outside in the car when I still had it. She lost her patience with me and took a new boyfriend, who took sadistic delight in causing me physical pain. He would routinely hit me with his fists or kick me with his steel-toe boots. I suppose he liked to hear me scream in pain whenever he did this. I remember one night he kicked me down the stairs -- I was lucky I didn't break any bones when he did that. A few days later I sternly told him to stop attacking me, which drove him into a rage. He chased me around the house, cornering me in a small room, and kicked me and hit me until my muzzle started bleeding. I ran to the back door of my house and told him to let me out, which he did. I then galloped as fast as I could to the nearest railroad tracks and hopped aboard a freight train, which took me south to a large city called Memphis."

"How could anypony do something so evil?"

"I don't know. Some people are so twisted in the head that they have no conscience. Living on the streets in Memphis was very hard for me -- I had to scrounge for food and water wherever I could find it, sometimes having to force out of my mind whether or not it was contaminated in some way or other. Bathing was another matter, proving to be extremely difficult. There is a river which flows on the west side of Memphis, and I tried to wash off in that river, but the current was so strong and swift that I had to swim as hard as I could to make it back to the riverbank. I nearly drowned in my attempt to wash the dirt out of my coat, mane and tail. I took to trying to wash off in water fountains in public parks, but would get chased off by animal control or other humans who couldn't stand the smell I was giving off. Trying to get food and water in that state was really hard, and I found myself having to go days without food. Finding shelter from the elements was also quite difficult as I would get chased out of apartment building vestbules, freeway overpasses, and any other place that might offer some shelter. Sleep -- whenever I could get it -- was difficult as well."

"How long did you go around like that? Why wouldn't anypony help you?"

"I wandered the streets of Memphis for ... I don't know, a year, maybe? Time lost its meaning to me after a while, more so after I lost my cutie mark." Twilight gasped again when the purple mare said that. "Yeah, that was really depressing, but not as depressing when I lost my ability to talk." Another gasp. "I got so depressed I trotted to a bridge over the river, climbed onto the guardrail and peered over the edge. I was seriously wondering if I should jump or not. I hesitated, looking down at the river flowing swiftly. It was a long way down, and jumping would most likely have resulted in my death."

"Was it really that bad?"

"Yeah, it was. But even as I was considering jumping, something told me not to. Even so, my health at this point had deteriorated to a point where I was not far from death anyway. I continued to wander the streets until lack of nourishment and fatigue overwhelmed me. I laid down and curled up into a ball in some apartment building entryway, not caring whether or not I lived or died at that point."

The two of them were shocked by this -- Twilight shed a couple of tears and Celestia wrapped a wing around the purple mare, who took a drink of water. Her eyes were moist as well as she had reminded herself of just how bad the situation had become at that time. She wiped away a tear with her right fore-hoof.

"I don't remember who rescued me, but I was taken to an animal hospital and nursed back to health, then transferred to a no-kill shelter. One of the employees of that shelter adopted me, though it took about a month to get all the paperwork issues addressed. Apparently, shelter employees were forbidden from adopting pets from the shelter they worked at, though the man's boss allowed him to take me to his apartment. He and his girlfriend were quite thrilled to have me living with them, but they soon tired of my needs. The man took me in his car to a cluster of casinos about a half hour's drive south of Memphis and dropped me off there. He told me never to return to the city and not to speak a word of what happened to anyone."

"That's ridiculous!" Twilight exclaimed, expressing disgust at the behavior.

"I certainly hope not all humans are so selfish and display such a blatant lack of compassion," Celestia stated flatly.

"Well, too many of them are in my opinion. As I was trotting toward one of the casinos, I bumped into Discord." The two of them glanced at each other, then turned to stare in disbelief at the purple mare. "Truthfully, if I had known then what I know now ..."

"What happened?"

"Discord restored my ability to use magic, though not after I had thoroughly berated him for destroying my life and my identity, Twilight."

"I can't believe he would do something of that sort, regardless of how remorseful he might feel. Something tells me there is something he wanted from you in exchange for that action," the Princess mused.

"Indeed there was, your Majesty. He asked me to work for him, though he also told me that if I performed well enough for him that I would be richly rewarded."

"I can only imagine," she chuckled. "So what did he have you do for him?"

"He had me instigate a gang war in Los Angeles, a conflict between rival drug lords in Mexico, a civil war in Ghana, and exacerbate the conflict between Israel and the Palestinians. After I finished up in Ghana, I returned to Discord's lair to get a bite to eat and some sleep in one of the most comfortable beds I had ever slept in. He came to me that night while I was trying to sleep -- I had made the mistake of offering the possibility of allowing him to have sex with me --"

"WHAAAT?! How could you? In MY body?!?" the lavender mare exclaimed.

"I'm afraid so, Twilight. You need not worry -- all he did was rub against me for a couple of minutes before he spent himself. I asked him if he was finished, and he sheepishly returned to his bed, though he told me that he occasionally got lonely. Maybe I was supposed to feel sorry for him, though I don't know if I honestly could, given what happened to my home world as a result of doing these things for him. The following day I teleported to Israel, more specifically the Palestinian side of this giant long wall separating Israeli territory from the Palestinian lands. I used my magic to blow large holes in that wall from the Palestinian side, which made the Israeli government very angry. They sent their military forces to attack a neighboring country. That country was called Iran, and Russia was their strongest ally. Russia attacked Israel, so Israel launched nuclear weapons at Russia, Iran and China. The United States, my home country and Israel's strongest ally came to their aid and Russia and China launched nuclear weapons at various locations in the United States. The resulting conflict put so much dirt and radiation into the sky that if nothing was done about it, all life on the planet would perish within a week."

The Princess and her student blanched, mouths agape. Amethyst was surprised by the Princess' reaction.

"I had teleported back to Discord's lair after blowing holes in the wall and he told me my work for him was done and that I should go somewhere -- anywhere but his lair. I went back to the house I used to live in, and the man my wife had taken as a boyfriend came out the door and chased me. I used my telekinesis to lift him about 50 feet above the ground and when he yelled at me to let him down, I let him fall but caught him in my aura before he hit the ground. I lifted him again to scare him further, but a police officer told me to put him down gently. Before I did, I asked him about my wife and he confessed to having killed her and cut her body up into small pieces and scattered them around the state in various places."

"He killed your wife?" Twilight asked in shock. "Why?"

"The man, whose name was Alonzo, was a very bad man -- but my wife -- she had a hot temper and a tendency to anger quickly. I guess Alonzo got tired of her attitude and killed her out of frustration. I set him down gently and allowed the police officer to arrest him and take him to jail. I teleported back to mid-town Manhattan, specifically Times Square to watch the news on the giant view screen which hung on a tall building. Discord showed up and congratulated me for a job well done and gave me a small pouch with ten gold coins in it. Suddenly everything went deathly still -- you could hear a pin drop -- and everything electronic died. I instinctively knew what was going to happen next, so I teleported to Ponyville, in front of the big tree which serves as Library and home for Twilight and me."

"I've never been to Ponyville! And you've never lived with ME!"

"Just bear with me, please. I was still in a copy of your body, but the pink streak in my mane and tail had turned blood red, though I didn't know it at the time. My cutie mark still hadn't returned, but I knocked on the door and Spike answered it -- his reaction to seeing me was nearly priceless, yours upon seeing me truly was priceless! You asked me what had happened to my cutie mark and my hair. I told you that I had lost my cutie mark several months ago and that I, um, didn't know what had happened to my hair, even after I had conjured up a small mirror to examine my mane and tail. You told me you thought I did know what happened, but before I could answer your questions of who I was and where I came from, Princess Celestia showed up at the front door of the library. Her reaction to seeing two Twilights was not so amusing."

"And just what was my reaction, exactly?"

"You glowered at me and demanded to know who I was and where I came from -- I told you this information and also my involvement with Discord and that I was afraid I had sealed my planet's fate. I remember asking you for asylum in Equestria, but as a different pony so I wouldn't be confused with Twilight. You expressed some degree of compassion for me when I told you that I had spent a year or so wandering the streets of Memphis, nearly dying from neglect, but that compassion dissipated when I told you what I had done in the service of Discord."

"You need to stop mentioning his name so much," the Princess stated, showing a little apprehension.

"The Elements of Harmony transformed him into a statue," Amethyst stated flatly.

"No, Amethyst -- they can be used for that purpose, but they are not in my possession."

"What day is this?"

"The Summer Sun Celebration is to be held in two days' time," Celestia responded.

"Don't tell me this is the thousandth year since Nightmare Moon's banishment," Amethyst stated with deep concern.

"It is."

"That's just an Old Mare's Tale, nothing to worry about!" Twilight grinned.

"Twilight, I'm going to send you to Ponyville tomorrow to check on preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration."

"But why?"

"You've been in Canterlot your entire life -- I believe you should broaden your horizons and make some new friends," Celestia said, smiling warmly at her student. "I would like to receive weekly reports from you on your friendship studies as well, Twilight."

"Yes, Princess."

"Your Majesty, may I accompany her, as I have been her housemate at the Library for the past three years or so?"

"Amethyst, I believe this is something Twilight must do on her own. I request you remain at the Castle until such time as I feel she is ready for you to return to Ponyville. You have knowledge of the future, and I cannot allow you to possibly change certain outcomes. Indeed, your very presence represents an uncontrollable variable, one which concerns me deeply. Even so, I find your story most fascinating and I would like to hear more from you -- I believe you are not finished with it yet."

"That's correct, your Majesty. You thought about what I had told you and you came to the conclusion that I should return to my home world to try to clean up the mess I had made -- asylum was out of the question. In fact, the choice you offered me was to be turned back into a human and sent to my home world to die within a week, or be returned there in Twilight's body to try to magically clean things up. My response was that even if I were to be transformed into an Alicorn that I doubted I'd be able to clean up as big a mess I had made, even with all the power an Alicorn would have at her disposal. Regardless of that fact, I took the latter choice and eventually chose Memphis as my landing point upon returning to my home world. I used my magic to try to clean up the sky a little, but there was so much dust and radiation that my attempts proved to be fruitless. Then Discord showed up again."

Something that sounded like a jacket being unzipped was heard as the God of Chaos made his entrance.

"Well, hello, ladies! I heard someone mention my name ... quite a few times!" he chuckled. Twilight recoiled in fear as the Princess adopted an aggressive stance towards the dragonequus. Amethyst glowered at him.

"I was hoping I'd never have to see you again," the purple mare hissed as she gritted her teeth.

"My, my, such animosity! I've been listening to this story of yours, and I find it quite amusing! Since you haven't finished telling it yet and it involves ME, I would appreciate hearing the rest of it!" he laughed.

"I just hope you don't try any funny stuff," the purple mare said angrily, still talking through clenched teeth.

"Relax, I'm not going to do anything ... at least, not yet anyway! I want to hear the whole story -- if I like it enough, I promise I won't bother you for a long time!"

"I hope it's for a thousand years," Amethyst hissed.

"Temper, temper, girl! Don't push your luck."

"YOU MADE ME CARRY TWO FOALS FOR YOU!!" the purple mare screeched.

"WHAAT?" the dragonequus shouted. "I've never seen you before in my life! How could I have possibly sired two foals by YOU?" His expression was truly frightening, but Amethyst stood her ground, even as the Sun Goddess recoiled from his outburst and Twilight shook like a leaf.

"Well, truth be told, it was somepony pretending to be you, but until that mystery had been unraveled, I could have sworn to Faust that YOU were the father! EJ still asks about you, and Stephanie -- she's never seen you, so she wouldn't know who you are, even though I've told her about you," the purple mare explained.

"EJ? Stephanie? What are you talking about? Who are you?" Discord asked, a very puzzled expression on his face.

"You must have missed the first part of my story then. You know, the part where I started out as a human, woke up as Twilight Sparkle, lost my ability to use magic, wandered around Memphis for a year, ran into you, worked for you, nearly destroyed my home world, allowed you to have a son by me while I was still in Twilight's body, you giving me a nice house by the ocean, you disappearing for three and a half years, then coming back when you said EJ needed a playmate ..."

The dragonequus stood dumbfounded at first, then started chuckling, then fell to the floor laughing as hard as he could, tears streaming from his eyes. "Stop it! Stop it! You're killing me!" he exclaimed through his raucous laughter.

"WHAT? You gave birth to a colt -- while in -- MY BODY?!?" Twilight shrieked. "And to HIM!! I can't believe it!"

"Twilight, I also gave birth to Stephanie while in a copy of your body as well -- and yes, before you ask again, Discord is supposedly the father for her as well," the purple mare stated calmly. The lavender mare was floored by this announcement. She flopped her mouth open and closed in an attempt to find the words to express her disbelief.

"It would be funny if it weren't so serious, but the truth is that I love them both dearly -- and they love you as well, Twilight as they recognize you as their birth mother. I wonder if I might be able to get back to the world I time traveled from," Amethyst mused somewhat sadly. The librarian continued to open and close her mouth, this new revelation causing more disbelief. The Princess was also stunned by the purple mare's explanation. Discord just chuckled, but maintained a pensive mood, thoughtfully rubbing his chin with his eagle talon. Amethyst returned her attention to the dragonequus.

"Nor did I mention the fact that because of you, I am ultimately responsible for the death of nearly five billion people on my home world -- though if it hadn't been for your help, all life on my home world would be dead, myself included."

"FIVE BILLION PEOPLE?!?!" all three of them asked simultaneously.

"I only make the bomb, I don't drop it," the purple mare stated flatly. Discord laughed at that, but Celestia glared at her. Twilight remained stunned, her mouth still open in a gasp.

"Wait. I'm still curious about your home world -- how did you get here, if you had no way of leaving your home world?" asked Discord, regaining his composure.

"Princess Celestia brought me, though I had enough magic power as Twilight to come here -- but I was warned not to come without Celestia's express permission -- and it wasn't until she was willing to let me come on HER terms, not whenever it struck my fancy."

"You were in ... HER body?" he asked, pointing his lion paw in the librarian's direction. She was still cowering behind the Alicorn. "Ha, ha, hah! That's rich!"

"She does have a very nice singing voice, if I do say so myself," Amethyst stated proudly. "I actually enjoyed being her, once my magic ability had been restored."

"So why did I help you? What was in it for me?"

"Because you stated that even though you live for chaos, wholesale destruction of an entire planet is too much chaos, even for you. The price I paid for your help was giving you an heir -- in this case, my, I mean, our son, EJ."

"How many times do I have to say this? I've NEVER SEEN YOU BEFORE IN MY LIFE!" he shouted.

"Because I told you that SOMEPONY WAS PRETENDING TO BE YOU!" the purple mare bellowed, using magic to amplify her voice.

"Oh. Sorry about that," he said softly, staring at the ground. "Tell me, girl, what does his name mean? What does he look like? Me, I hope," the dragonequus grinned.

"You wanted to name him 'Equanimity' and I wanted to name him 'Jeffrey' so I guess you took the initials and called him EJ. He is a fine young unicorn colt, solid grey with a purple sheen if the light shines on his coat at the right angle. His hooves are purple and his horn has a purple swirl mixed with the solid medium grey. His mane and tail are glossy black with purple highlights. He got his cutie mark of three swords about a month ago," the purple mare stated proudly, smiling broadly.

"So how old is he?"

"He'll be eight years old next month."

"If his cutie mark is three swords, that means he can use his magic like my big brother, who can make shields with his magic," Twilight surmised. "So what does he think of me? And my brother?"

Amethyst brightened considerably. "He thinks the world of both you and your brother -- he regards your brother as an idol, looks up to him very highly. I remember he went to Canterlot Castle with you and me to visit your brother about two years after he got married to Cadance. Shiny gave him a tour of the barracks, which included the weapon racks. EJ was so fascinated by the swords that he wanted one and was crestfallen when he was told he couldn't have one. He obsessed over those swords, especially the really big ones to the point that he started using his magic to try to create one. He got really good at making magic swords, and that was what led to him getting his cutie mark. One day, he and his best friend Pound Cake were playing with a large rubber ball, kicking it back and forth in a field not far from the Everfree Forest. Their laughter caught the attention of about five or six timber wolves that decided to investigate the noise. The wolves advanced on the two colts and started chasing them. The wolves were a lot faster than the colts and caught up to them, surrounding them. EJ summoned his magic swords, lots of them, and used them against the wolves, reducing them to firewood. That's how EJ got his cutie mark!"

"I'm so proud of him!" the dragonequus grinned. "That makes me want to have a child of my own. Say, Amethyst, would you be interested in making a deal with this old God of Chaos?"

The purple mare let out a scream so loud and primal that it virtually shook the room. Discord was stunned by her outburst, and even the Princess showed a shocked expression.

"Sorry I asked," he grinned. "Did you mention something about my lair?"

"You changed locations a few times, but I remember a penthouse suite on the top floor of a high rise in mid-town Manhattan. Nice view, even if the decor was a bit Spartan."

"I have simple needs," he chuckled. "I don't need extravagant flourishes." He gave Celestia a wink and a grin. She glowered at him in disapproval.

"I guess one thing you did to help me was speed up the gestation period to two months -- both times." This shocked the Princess and her student.

"But what about the development of the foal? Wasn't there a possibility of complications or defects?" asked the librarian.

"Heh. The God of Chaos controlled those factors, along with selecting the gender of the foals -- although I was given my preference for Stephanie," the purple mare explained.

"Why did you give her that name? Tell me a little about her, please!"

"I chose the name of Stephanie because I liked it -- but I have given her a pony name as well -- so her full name is Stephanie Galaxy Sparkle." Discord started laughing hard again but Twilight was shocked, slack-jawed and wide-eyed.

"Why did you give her my family name?" she asked in exasperation.

"Because I was in a copy of your body when I gave birth to her. She's getting close to four years old now, still the cutest little unicorn filly you could ever hope to lay eyes on. Her coat is a nice shade of purple, about four shades lighter than mine and four shades darker than yours. Her mane and tail are a silvery white, her eyes a pale blue. Her idol is Princess Luna, but she has a very strong bond with you, Twi. Luna showed her how she arranges the stars in the night sky, oftimes complaining about how nopony appreciates all the hard work and artistry she puts into placing the constellations in perfect order. Many nights she will spend looking through your telescope at the night sky, sometimes staying up until dawn. She is already starting to show a strong magical ability and a high level of intelligence. I half-way wonder if she might someday become your successor as a bearer of the Element of Magic."

All three of them stood in stunned silence once again. Celestia regained her composure first and glared daggers at the purple mare.

"Why couldn't you keep quiet? Twilight was not supposed to know about that!"

"It is her destiny, your Majesty. Honestly, she and I are like peas in a pod, we're that close. Twi's like a sister to me."

"Element of Magic? What's that?" asked a very puzzled Twilight.

"Hmm. Sounds very interesting," Discord mused.

"It may be her destiny, Amethyst, but she has to discover that on her own. What you know about her future is information you MUST keep to yourself! Do NOT divulge any more of her future!" Celestia sharply admonished. Discord chuckled and then resumed laughing.

"I don't have to do anything! This is so amusing! I swear I'm going to die laughing if this keeps up!"

"How did you get a number for your cutie mark?" asked Twilight.

"Ah. Good question. As a human, I had a fascination with numbers, bordering on obsession. The number 17 is my favorite number, one which I attach special significance. I consider it to be the luckiest of all numbers, the most sacred of all numbers. I consider it an honor and a blessing that I carry that number as my cutie mark."

The dragonequus glanced at the purple mare and waved his lion paw at her. The number changed from 17 to 18. Twilight gasped at this and Celestia chuckled softly. The purple mare followed Celestia's gaze and saw that her cutie mark had been changed. She let out another primal scream and lit her horn, her expression one of apoplectic rage.

"CHANGE IT BACK! NOW!!"

"Ha, ha, ha! You should see the look on your face!" he laughed. He waved his lion paw again, restoring the number. "Wow, I got a good laugh from that! Now I know how to push your buttons! I'm going to keep you around for my amusement!"

"You ... you ... AAAAAGH! Why do you have to torment me like this!? Haven't you done enough damage?"

"You said it was somepony pretending to be me -- so who would be so foolish as to impersonate the God of Chaos?"

"Does the name Trollestia mean anything to you? Any of you?"

The dragonequus and Sun Goddess started chuckling. Twilight was mystified.

"I didn't find out about it until after I had spent time in a prison after I had turned myself in to the authorities for committing genocide and crimes against peace. Discord had shown up at my oceanfront house, telling me EJ wanted a playmate. I told him that a second foal was out of the question, but if he was willing to extend my lifespan to about 5000 years, give me a mountaintop castle the same size as Canterlot, provide me with enough gold coin to purchase anything I wanted over that extremely long lifespan and allow me to choose the gender of the foal and her name that I would be willing to provide him with a second foal."

Discord nearly fell out laughing. "I would never give you all that, just for a second -- wait a minute. That doesn't really sound like a bad deal to me! Say, Amethyst? You still willing to take me up on that offer?" he grinned.

"You ... you ..." the purple mare hissed, grinding her teeth audibly. Celestia grinned, but Twilight was mortified.

"You were still in my body?" the lavender unicorn asked.

"Yes, Twi. Anyway, I had found out at that point that I was being sought by the authorities for my crimes, so one of the things I mentioned to Discord was that I was perhaps a bit more concerned about my status as a fugitive from justice than my desire for material possessions. Discord responded by changing my appearance from that of Twilight Sparkle to that of Beatrix Lulamoon, better known as 'The Great and Powerful Trixie'."

"Never heard of her," Twilight mused.

"You will, Twi -- my advice is to stay away from her -- but I digress. I was not happy about that transformation -- what?"

Discord had waved his lion paw at the purple mare once again, who was now transformed into said azure unicorn, complete with the styled mane and tail and Trixie's cutie mark. Amethyst saw this and screamed again. Discord started laughing again, rolling on the floor, tears streaming from his eyes.

"This is what Beatrix Lulamoon looks like -- I told Discord that Trixie's magic is not as strong as Twilight's, and he gave me a small trinket -- a silver pendant with a red diamond in the center. He said, 'If you don't think your magic is up to snuff, here, have this' as he tossed the Alicorn Amulet in my direction. I asked him where he had obtained the talisman and he told me he was not at liberty to divulge that information.

"Now, I would like to state that I enjoy performing karaoke -- and as Twilight, I was able to sing magnificently. But as Trixie, well, singing was ... painful to my ears. I don't know if that was Discord's doing, or if Trixie really IS tone-deaf, but it did detract significantly from my happiness. I found that as Trixie, I could not teleport, nor did I like the taste of my favorite foods, and I had to take another shower to clean myself up. For some strange reason or other, I had developed a craving for pine cones while I was in Trixie's body -- I didn't actually go get any, of course, but the craving was intense.

"So I decided to write Princess Celestia a letter asking for advice, including a request for asylum once again -- but after having written the letter, I could not open a portal window through which to send the letter. I decided to wear the Alicorn Amulet, despite the fact that it has a tendency to corrupt the soul of anypony who wears it, but I felt compelled to send the letter. Apparently, I decided to teleport to Ponyville once again to meet up with Twilight."

"You were in -- Trixie's body? What happened?"

"In that world, you and Spike were quite familiar with the show-mare and were not happy to see me, at least while I was in that body -- Discord, will you PLEASE change me back into my previous form?"

"Ha, ha, ha, give me a moment!" he continued laughing for another minute, then waved his lion paw at the azure unicorn who was then transformed back into her normal form. She glowered at the dragonequus, who continued to chuckle.

"If you don't mind my asking, what exactly is karaoke?" asked the Sun Goddess.

"I would have to demonstrate it to give you a better understanding," Amethyst stated. She lit her horn and conjured up a karaoke machine from air molecules. Discord let out a low whistle when he saw this happen. The purple mare turned the machine on and levitated the microphone in front of her. The first song that started playing was "In and Out of Love" by The Supremes -- in her past, Amethyst had also collected quite a bit of old music, her favorite genre being that of the Girl Groups and Wall of Sound era. When she finished singing, she turned off the machine.

"I suppose I should have warned you about human music," the purple mare grinned. All three of them stood in stunned silence once again.

"That was ... very interesting," Celestia mused.

"I kind of liked it," Twilight offered.

"I've heard better," Discord muttered.

"My singing voice in this body is not quite as good as Twilight's, but even so, I'm not upset over that fact. But anyway, when I met up with Twilight while still in Trixie's body, she recognized me and the talisman I was wearing. I told her I had a letter I wanted to send to Princess Celestia and wondered if Spike could send it. When I told you who I really was, you remembered me from before when I was in your body, and your concern about Discord following me from my home world to Equestria was made evident when you told me to leave as soon as possible. Despite that, you allowed Spike to send the letter I had written, but not before reading it aloud. You found what I had written to be somewhat amusing, but Celestia's response showed no such amusement."

"So what did you write to me about?" Celestia asked. Discord simply grinned.

"I simply asked for advice on what to do and also asked, once again, for you to allow me to stay in Equestria. Your response was rather harsh, impugning my intelligence, telling me to leave immediately or face dire consequences, and a threat -- if I returned, my next visit would be my last."

The Sun Goddess expressed shock at this statement. "I can't believe I would be that harsh, Amethyst. What possessed me to write such a rebuke?"

"It was part of your plan to track down and bring to justice your ... evil side."

"Trollestia may be mischievous, but she is NOT evil!" Celestia protested.

"Thanks to her, five billion humans are dead," the purple mare stated flatly.

"Do NOT blame HER for your actions, Amethyst! I've half a mind to --"

The dragonequus erupted into uproarious laughter. "Do my work for me, Celestia!"

"Be quiet, Discord."

"I think the worst thing about it was that you took the foals out of my arms shortly after I had given birth to each of them, about three and a half years apart from each other. Worse still was how you abandoned me after childbirth, not once, but twice. I was never given an opportunity to develop the critical bond with my foals, though they still regard me and Twilight as their mothers. Not long after I had given birth to Stephanie and the veterinarian had left my house, I shouted at the ceiling that there would not be a third foal for you, Discord. Then my house started shaking like an earthquake was happening. I determined that my house was being lifted, but I was terrified for two minutes while the changes were taking place to my house. When it stopped, I made my way to a balcony overlooking the ocean -- about seventeen hundred feet down. My house had been turned into a castle sitting atop a very high cliff. I found out later that all this was just an elaborate illusion, though."

"I'm a dragonequus of my word! If I promised something in return for a certain action, I would never go back on my word! But then again, you did say it was an impostor pretending to be me. You reap what you sow, girl!"

"Whatever. After about a week of exploring and admiring my new home, I was struck by the stained glass windows depicting important events in my life. It was the one of me in Twilight's body blasting holes in the wall that ultimately made me decide to turn myself in to the authorities. Discord had changed me back into Twilight at my request and I rewarded him by singing one of my favorite songs -- apparently, he liked it quite a bit."

"Oh? And what song was that? You sang it while in Twilight's body?" he asked.

"Change me into Twilight and I will perform it for you," the purple mare offered. Discord responded by waving his lion paw at Amethyst again, transforming her into the lavender librarian. She turned on the karaoke machine and sang "Wake Up John" by Little Eva -- she involuntarily performed her movements while singing, grinning broadly. It had been too long since she had last been able to replicate such a fine performance. Celestia and Twilight smiled in approval. The song was done in two minutes and Amethyst asked Discord to return her to her normal form, which he promptly did.

"You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" the dragonequus grinned.

"I suppose you could say that, yes. Anyway, I turned myself in and was placed in a jail cell. Amazingly enough, when I was being arraigned, you showed up in the courtroom and announced that you had made me instigate the nuclear war, then disappeared. When I was asked how to plead, I responded with 'Not Guilty'."

"I find it difficult to believe I would have accepted your presence in Equestria, Amethyst. You admitted to being responsible for the death of five billion people. I believe I should send you back to your human home world," Celestia stated flatly.

"I'm not finished with my story, your Majesty. While I was sitting in prison, Discord visited me yet again and transformed me back into my human form. The prison guard asked me who I was and what I was doing sitting naked in the cell. I told him that I had been watching television and found myself being stripped of my clothing, then being dumped off in the prison cell while Discord took Twilight with him.

"Oh, and I had written you a letter, giving you permission to use my mountaintop home as you saw fit, if you were interested in visiting my home world. I was still in Twilight's body at that time, so opening a portal window to send you the letter was easy, so I did. But when I was in my human body again, I had to answer lots of questions. Ultimately, I was taken back to my home outside San Diego -- but at the street level. I stared up at my house, way up high and wondered how I was supposed to get in there.

"So once again I called upon Discord for assistance -- he was getting fed up with my requests and told me this was the very last favor he was going to do for me -- and teleported me into my house. He then warned me not to call on him again and left. As I wandered through my house, I noticed some of the decor had been changed -- originally, all the decorations had Twilight's six-pointed star on them -- but they had been changed into a large sun. I looked for my Alicorn Amulet, but was unable to find it. I made my way to my throne room, and who should be sitting on my throne than none other than -- dun dun dunnn -- Princess Celestia!"

"Now why would I do such a thing?" Celestia grinned.

"It gets better -- you asked me to summon Discord again!" the purple mare chuckled.

"What? After I had warned you NOT to?" he asked in surprise.

"I told Celestia I feared for my safety, but she told me not to worry. I summoned you once again, and you were ... not happy, to say the least. Then you saw the Princess, and decided that, um, you needed to be going somewhere -- but the Princess used her magic to hold you in place and your disguise fell away as Celestia told me you were actually Trollestia instead. I was instructed to remove your horn, which I did. Trollestia decided she wanted a couple of foals to raise on her own, though I have no idea why she wanted to. I told her I wanted them back since I had given birth to them, but she refused to cooperate. I asked the Princess for a feather so I could perform a tickle torture on her, but I didn't have to -- she told us where they were, and Celestia teleported them to my house.

"I was then shown that they had been ensorcelled with glamour, a kind of illusion, which Celestia dispelled. She then showed me that my house was a glamour, my oceanfront view was a glamour, and that my house turned out to be a prison -- ironic, really, given the circumstances -- I had a glass wall overlooking the ocean, but it turned out that it was a missing wall of my house, giving me a beautiful view of an oil refinery complex -- and open to anypony or anything that wanted to enter and/or leave whenever they wished.

"Celestia then asked me if I wanted to stay on my home world or start a new life in Equestria, raising my foals among others of their species. I told her that I was going to need help raising them, but was allowed to stay with Twilight at her Library. I spent more than three years living with Twilight, getting to know her and all her friends and everypony in Ponyville very well -- but not too long ago, Twilight was visited by a future version of herself, warning of some danger of some sort or another which was going to happen about four days after her visit. We were running around like chickens with their heads cut off trying to danger-proof Ponyville."

"A future version of myself? How did she travel through time?"

"She said the time travel spell was located in the Starswirl the Bearded Wing of the Canterlot Royal Archives -- in fact, you and I were there earlier today -- you were showing me around, but I found the book with the time travel spell in it and cast it, much to your consternation. Now I find myself having landed a couple of days before the Summer Sun Celebration on the thousandth year of Nightmare Moon's banishment."

"A very entertaining story I must say! Bravo, Amethyst! I shall be taking my leave now, but I will be back ... sometime ... but I'm not going to tell you when! Bye!" Discord chuckled and teleported away.