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An Unlikely Hunter

by Bolding

Chapter 3: Chapter 3: Trial of the Elements

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Staff in hand, you move deeper into the Everfree Forest. The thick brush wasn't exactly easy to navigate through. Having this burden on your back didn't help, either. Pinkie wasn't exactly light, after all. The mare cheerfully hums as you continue to walk through the dark forest.

“Hey Pinkie, what exactly is this 'Trial of the Elements'?" She shifts herself so her head is right next to yours.

"When the girls and I went to change Luna back from Nightmare Moon, we had to go through the Everfree Forest to reach the Ancient Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters."

"What was exactly on the way there?" She puts a hoof to her chin and thinks.

“Well, we had the cliffs, the manticore, the spooky trees, the serpent in the river, and then the rickety old bridge.” Great, just what you needed: heights and monsters.

"Oh, did I ever tell you about the time when I found out I was the element of laughter? It's amazing! I cou-" Annnnnd focus was kicking in.

You quickly block out the sounds of Pinkie's voice and continue onwards. Making your way through the bushes and trees, you come to a cliff.

‘This must be the first part she was talking about.’

You look over the edge. The height was enough to break every bone in your body and kill Pinkie as well. You still had to keep her safety a priority. There are some small ledges that extend out the side of the steep cliff. Throwing your staff down, it hits the bottom and lays in the grass below. Slowly, you sit along the edge of the cliff.

Placing one foot on the ledge below, you lower yourself. You put your stomach against the wall and look down towards the next ledge. Maybe if you jump you can make it? You think to yourself and balance the options.

You could jump down and land on the ledge and continue that way down, but that left the possibility of missing and falling to your death. The only other option was to hang off and slowly lower yourself to next ledge, but it would leave you stranded at some point. A thought strikes your head.

Why not both?

Grabbing the ledge you lower yourself to the next. Continuing this motion, you finally hit the halfway point. The was no ledge directly below you, so it was about time to jump. Carefully, you leap to ledge below you. As you land, you feel yourself still moving. You forgot one factor: Pinkie. Her weight shifting from the landing pulls you right over the ledge. You quickly grab the ledge and hang on for dear life.

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Fear was quickly over taking your focus. Pinkie's squeals of delight were overtaking your ears as you held on. Trying your hardest, you attempt to lift yourself back up the ledge. The added weight from Pinkie wasn't helping the matter. Slowly you make your way up and stand back on the ledge.

"Let's do that again!" Pinkie continues to squeal as you regain your focus.

'That was a close one,' you think to yourself. You look down to the next ledge. Thankfully, you can just lower yourself down to it. Slowly, you lower yourself down onto the ledge. Your back begins to rumble as you step onto it.

"-itch!" You turn your head to the pink mare's face.

"What are you doing?"

"Twitch-a-twitch! My tail is twitching!"

"Wha-" The ledge gives way under your feet.

Almost instantly, you grab a hold of an indent in the wall. Hanging on, you look around. There's another ledge not too far from you. You shift your weight from left to right and swing over to the ledge. Placing your feet down on it, you breathe out a sigh of relief.

"What was that just now Pinkie?"

"My tail was a twitching! I means that something is going to fall!" You look over to see her smiling.

"You really expect me to believe that just because your tail is twitching that something is going to fall?" Her smile extends.

"It just happened, right?"

It was useless to fight it. You were in a strange world with talking horses after all. Looking down, you get an idea.

"Pinkie, you think you can shake your tail to tell me which ledges are going to fall?" She shakes her head.

"I don't control it, Anon, it just happens." Well that plan was shot. You lower yourself to the next platform and continue down. The bottom was getting closer and closer. Having Pinkie on your back was like a having a strange falling detector.

Every time you were about to land on an unstable ledge, she'd violently shake, giving you the heads up that it was unsafe to do. Eventually you make your way to the bottom. You pick up your staff, when all of a sudden a vibration starts on your back again.

"-tch! Twitch-a-twitch!" You turn to the mare to tell her you were off the cliff already when you see it out of the corner of your eye. Rocks were beginning to fall from the side of the cliff. Sprinting with the speed of an Olympic runner, you make your way away from the cliffside.

Bits and pieces of the cliffside fall all around you as you dive under a tree. Looking back, you see the ground littered with rocks and boulders. Taking in a deep breath, you relax for a moment. You turn to Pinkie, who is humming on your back.

"You alright?" She stops humming and smiles.

"Yep!" You stand back up and walk forward. Looking around, you see you're in between two cliffs. It was best to keep an eye out and be ready for Pinkie's tail twitch. Slowly, you make your way to the end of the canyon.

Something stops you. The feeling of something watching you. Looking up at the cliff, you notice a shadow and quickly take cover.

"Who are you and why are you following me?!" you yell. A few pebbles begin to fall off the face of the cliffs from the echoes. A roar shakes the valley, bringing your attention elsewhere. More pebbles and a few rocks begin to fall off the cliffside. A giant creature is sprinting towards you, not slowing down one bit.

"Oh, hey! It's that manticore! He's a real sweetheart when you get to know him." The creature dives toward you, claws extended. You narrowly dodge it by sidestepping.

"Seems like he's not interested in introductions at the moment." The creature lands and turns to you, tail flailing. Pinkie taps your shoulder to get your attention.

"He probably didn't like the yelling from before. You should apologize." The monster swings its giant claws, trying its hardest to bring you down. Leaning back between every swipe, you feel the air from each swing push against your face. Lifting your staff, you ready yourself to face the creature. As it lifts its left paw, you quickly jab it in the face with the butt of your staff. The creature rears back and anger quickly fills its face. Pinkie is now smacking her hoof against your back.

"Anon! That is not how you apologize to somepony! You usually start with a 'sorry' and then get a batch of cupca-" Her explanation is quickly cut short as your head smacks into her snout from you jerking back to dodge the manticore's strikes.

"Pinkie, I don't think he wants an apology. I think he wants my head." Taking the staff, you begin to bash the side of its head repeatedly, not showing any sign of stopping. The monster begins to retreat to avoid the blows. There was no chance you were letting this thing get a break from the hits.

You move in quickly and smack the creature in the face a few more times. Almost in an instant, you are thrown back by a huge force against your chest, sending you on your ass. The monster's tail whips back into position and it lets out a mighty roar again. Rocks begin to fall down as the echoes shake the canyon. You stand up, only to quickly roll out of the way from the manticore's angry tail. Pinkie taps you on the shoulder.

"Anon."

"Not now, Pinkie!" Another tap.

"Anon!"

"Not now!"

"The rocks, Anon! The rocks!" Looking up, you realize what she's saying. You can see a rock about the size of a bowling ball hanging loosely on the cliff-side. Grabbing a rock, you ready yourself.

"Hey, you ugly son of bitch! Is that all you got?" You take the rock throw it at the small boulder. As you quickly smack the beast in the face with your staff, it attempts to dive at you. You quickly jump back as the rock plummets to the ground, smashing against the beast's head. Its eyes roll back as it falls to the ground.

Wiping the sweat from your face, you look down at the monster. It was still breathing.

"Looks like it's just knocked out. Let's get out of here before it wakes back up." Pinkie violently shakes your shoulders.

"Anon! You defeated it in battle! Put your dick in it!" You lightly tap her in the back of the head with your staff.

"Damn it, Pinkie." As you make your way toward the end of the canyon, the sun begins to set. Darkness begins to consume the area around you in a fell swoop. Ahead is another part of the forest. Making your way in, Pinkie begins to giggle.

"I remember this! This is where all the funny trees are!" Looking closely, you see plenty of trees, but nothing funny about them. They look like they have creepy faces etched on them. Cautiously, you continue forward. A twig snaps behind you and you quickly turn, staff ready. It's too dark to see anything clearly.

"Show yourself!" A branch quickly swings toward your face with an intense force. You duck as the branch flies through Pinkie's mane. Collecting yourself, you stand up and look around. The darkness was clearly against you in this fight, so sight was not to be relied on.

You hear a swish to your right and you quickly jump out of the way. This was an uneven fight. You had no idea who was attacking and you couldn't see them. There was only one option: Run. You begin to sprint towards the only source of light you can see, narrowly dodging branches as you make your way. Pinkie begins to squeal with delight.

"Whee! It's like we're dancing!" God damn this mare, she was going to be the death of you. Closer and closer, the light begins to grow brighter as you head towards the exit. Sweat was beginning to drop down your forehead as you sprinted towards your only sanctuary.

“Almost there. Almost there,” you mutter to yourself. The sounds of branches lunging at you continue. One gets lucky and catches your foot. You tumble into the hard ground face first, grabbing a mouthful of dirt and leaves on the landing. As quickly as you can, you stand up and see it. The little light reveals the trees with the creepy faces were laughing.

No sound emitted from their 'mouths', but it was clear they were laughing at you. A branch extends from one, trying to swing at you. The trees were moving on their own accord! Rolling to your side, the branch narrowly misses you. It instead hits the ground, digging a massive hole out. Pinkie begins to giggle as well, still holding onto you.

"These trees like a good prank too!" Pranks were the least of your worries. It was clear these things wanted you dead, what with the force of their swings. Like a bolt of lightning, you continue on your quest for the light source. Sounds of air being broken can be heard behind you, but you weren't looking back. The gap ahead was clear and open as you dive out of the forest.

Lying on your stomach, you take a deep breath and try to regain your strength. Something suddenly wraps around your leg and begins to drag you in. A tree now had a hold of you as it slowly brought you back into the forest. Grabbing your staff, you smash its tip into the branch repeatedly. The limb begins to crack as pieces of bark and timber fly out. The tree releases its grip and retracts the branch.

A look of sheer pain is on its creepy face. Quickly, you run as far from the edge of the forest as possible. You sit down and catch your breath. Pinkie rears her head around and looks at you in disappointment.

"That wasn't very nice, Anon. That tree just wanted to play!" Angrily, you hold back the temptation of hitting Pinkie with the back of your head.

"It wanted to play, alright! It wanted to turn me into a ragdoll as it tossed around my lifeless corpse!" you sarcastically yell. Pinkie glares at you and begins to run her mouth.

"You know, a little bit of laughter wouldn't hurt Anon. You take things way too seriously!" Grabbing her by the scruff of her neck, you bring her face to face with yourself.

"Yeah, and you don't take things seriously at all! Everything's a joke or a game to you! I'm trying to take this seriously because my life will always be at risk with this job." She turns her head, a frown spread across her face. Your heart sinks as you look at her. Her puppy-dog eyes just kill you a little bit inside. Letting out an annoyed sigh, you turn her head to yours.

"Look, I'm sorry for yelling at you. I just want to make sure that we don't die out there is all. It doesn't mean we can't have some fun with this." Her signature smile returns as she wraps her hooves around your chest.

"You're right Anon. I should be taking this a little more seriously. I'm sorry too." You can't help but return the hug. Placing her on your back again, you begin to head further towards your destination. Following the path, you come to a calm stream. Looking around, you see nothing dangerous. It was too easy. As you hover your foot over the water's surface, Pinkie shifts herself and puts her hoof to her forehead, scanning the area.

"Where's Steve?"

"Steve?" Your foot touches the water and almost instantly, the calm water turns into a raging stream. You quickly retract your foot. There was no way you were going to cross the water in this condition. A giant purple serpent, sporting an orange mane and mustache, erupts from the center of the stream and brings its face to yours.

Almost instinctively, you ready your staff as you stare into the gleaming eyes of this beast. Fear quickly takes over reason. How were you supposed to take this thing down? Pinkie jumps from your shoulders onto the beast's face, giving it a hug.

"Stevie!" The creature extends its arms and grabs Pinkie, pinning her with a bear hug.

"Oh, Pinkie dear! It's been ages since I've seen you!" Lowering your staff, you breathe a sigh of relief. This must be what she was talking about. Steven places Pinkie on the shore and she quickly hops onto your back. Pinkie points at his mustache.

"I see your mustache grew back. It looks great!" The serpent's face grows rosy as it blushes.

"Thank you my dear. What brings you to these parts again?" She places her head on top of yours.

"My friend here needs to get the ruins ahead." His eyes widen and he lowers his voice.

"Has she returned again?!" Pinkie giggles and shakes her head.

”No, it’s part of his training.” You extend your hand to introduce yourself.

"The name's Anonymous." He looks at your dirt-covered hand in disgust. Lightly grabbing the cleanest part of your hand, he shakes it.

"Steven Magnet. A pleasure." He quickly dips his hand under the water and retrieves a handkerchief, furiously cleaning his hand. Pinkie smiles and shakes her head.

"Nope. Anon here is trying to reach the ruins as a test to see if he's ready to be a bounty hunter." The serpent whips his head towards you and looks at you from head to toe.

"Well, he certainly has the physical build, but what about the mental build?" Pinkie rubs her shoulder in a disapproving way and motions for him to come closer.

"He's not the best cookie in the jar when it comes to smarts, if you know what I mean."

"I can hear you, you know." The serpent pulls away and looks at you again.

"I'm afraid I can't let you pass, Anon." Pinkie's face quickly turns annoyed upon hearing this.

"Aww, why not Stevie! You let us go!" He crosses his arms and lifts his chin to the sky.

"I let you pass because you helped me out. By Serpent Code, I can’t let anything cross unless they can solve a riddle. It's the rules." Pinkie lets out annoyed grunt as you raise your hand.

"I accept your challenge." He raises an eyebrow and clears his throat.

"The caterpillar is a simple creature. It eats leaves, encases itself in a cocoon, and before you know it, turns into a beautiful butterfly." Raising his hands, he continues.

"But alas, there is one caterpillar that does not turn into a butterfly. It grows and grows, but does not move from its place. As it grows, it becomes more beautiful still. What type of caterpillar is it?" You look at the ground and ponder for a moment. Like you knew anything about caterpillars.

"The answer is always in front of you, but the eyes chose not to see it." The quote from the Marelock books hits you hard. Peering up, you look Steven in the face as he twirls his mustache. A smile seizes your face as you look at him.

"It's not an actual caterpillar. It's a mustache." His eyes shoot open as he grins. The raging stream grows calm once again.

"Very well done! How did you know?" Giving off a victorious shrug, you smirk.

"I opened my eyes." The serpent extends his tail out of the water and signals for you to climb aboard. He slowly brings you over to the opposite shoreline and quickly pulls his tail back as you walk off. Pulling out the handkerchief again, he frantically wipes his tail as you walk away. Pinkie rubs her hoof into your hair.

"Wow Anon! I didn't think you'd get it." Turning your head, you give her a small glare.

"Gee, thanks for the boost of confidence." She giggles as you continue down the path. After a short walk through some bushes and trees, you come to a rickety old bridge. Thick fog covers your view of the other side. Pinkie begins to shake excitedly on your back.

"We're almost there! It's on the other side of this bridge." Looking over, it doesn't seem like much. A quick jaunt over a bridge and you were home free.

It seemed too simple. Looking over at tree to your side, you grab a long vine from a low branch. You tie the vine to the large post holding the bridge and then yourself. Now if you fell, you wouldn't have to worry. Looking down the canyon, you see nothing but fog. The only flaw in this plan was that you didn't know how far down this pit went.

If this rope was too long, you'd badly injure yourself. An idea pops into your head. Grabbing a rock, you throw it down into the pit. It takes about six seconds before you hear a faint tapping, signifying it hit the bottom. It was safe to say that the drop was far, but that didn't really mean much. If the vine was not able to hold your weight along with Pinkie's it would mean deathly consequences.

The goal was right in front of you, within walking distance. A rickety bridge wasn't going to keep you from finishing your job. Slowly, you place one foot on the first board. Pushing your weight, you test to see if it will withhold you two. No signs of it falling yet.

Moving onto the second one, you perform the same procedure. No problem. You continue this until you reach about twenty or so boards. A tight tug restricts you from advancing. Looking back, the vine has reached its length. Grabbing the knot, you untie yourself from it and continue on your way. This was risky, but you were almost there, you could feel it. Slowly you continue your way until a faint outline of the ruins come across the fog. Pinkie points her hoof out towards the figure.

"Look Anon! We're almost there!" Without hesitation, you continue your slow endeavor. As you reach the last board, you decide not to take any more time. You jump from your position to the cliff's edge. Mid-air from your jump, your heart sinks.

A dreaded vibration shakes at your back.

"My tail!" As you land, the weight from your jump cracks the edge of the cliff. The cliff collapses as you quickly lean forward, grasping anything you can. Digging your hands into the ground, you pick yourself and Pinkie up across the edge. Pinkie giggles as you wipe the dust from your clothes.

"You really have bad luck with heights, don't you?" Give her sly smile, you head up the stairs of the ruins.

"Seems like it." You walk through the tall doorway and enter the ruins. White cobblestone surrounds the room, emitting deep echoes with every footstep. You look across the room at a strange statue. An odd figure rests on top of it. Sitting on the tip of her staff is none other than Zecora. She opens her eyes and looks at you.

"You took your time. I waited long to see if you were weak or strong." She jumps down from her position. Her staff twirls in the air from the bounce and lands on her back.

"You have done well, I cannot lie. I completely expected you to die." You point at the pink pony on your back.

"I can't lie either. If it weren't for her, we'd both be dead quite a few times." Zecora smiles and nods to Pinkie.

"Thank you for your help, Ms. Pie, for ensuring that Anonymous did not die." Pinkie jumps off your back, beaming at you two.

"It was so much fun! There were so many rocks and rolling and diving and then there was the riddle an-" Zecora puts her hoof to Pinkie's mouth.

"Yes I am aware. Though you did not see me, I was there." A memory of a shadow pops into your head.

"So that was you at the canyon?" She nods and smiles at you.

"Well Anon, your quest is over, it is at an end..." She stomps her hoof down and a playful grin etches across her face. "...but there is a bounty waiting for you to apprehend!"

A smile sneaks onto your face. It was time. Your stomach lets out a massive roar. Pinkie and Zecora stare at you and begin to laugh.

"The bounty can wait until you eat and rest; you will need it to fight your best." She begins to make way towards the door when you have a revelation.

"Uh, Zecora? The bridge is out. How are we going to get back." She stops at the doorway and turns her head slightly.

"I know this forest like the back of my hoof. The way you came is not the only one, you goof." Pinkie jumps up, looking angered.

"You mean Twilight and I didn't have to go the way we came to get here? She's not going to want to hear that!" You chuckle at the thought of Twilight getting angry over the news. Guess it was another secret you had to take to your grave. You feel a slight tap on the side of your leg. Looking down, Pinkie has her eyes half-lidded.

"Hey Anon. You should totally 'thank' Zecora. You know, with your dick.”You smack her in the back of head.

"Damn it, Pinkie."

Next Chapter: Chapter 4: Yeehaw! Estimated time remaining: 2 Hours, 48 Minutes
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