"Now put your booty in the air,
Let the fellas see what you wear down there,
Booty booty booty rocking everywhere.
Big J Prowler here to announce,
That I pay for my bitches by the ounce,
So if you got the D cups, make 'em bounce bounce bounce."

Imagine hearing that continuously for almost six hours. If one read my previous entry, they will have seen where I stated that my CCMI has been damaged and will continuously play my music library on shuffle. Well, it just so happens that "shuffle" has decided to play that one song on repeat 137 times.

I never even meant to download this stupid song! It was on one of Jeremy Prowler's MIRRDs that I borrowed one day just to download a couple of videos! I would rather keep the nature of what those videos were about confidential, but he must have had these damn music files stuffed in between on the drive when I copied over its contents. Its even worse that these are songs he made! He believed he was going to be a musician one day with this kind of nonsense? As if anyone with some sense about them would buy something this crass and in such poor taste.

Now I am stuck listening to him; listening to him sing about breasts, butts, and bitches. This has given me time and reason to consider how I might choose to kill myself. The best scenario I have contemplated so far was broadcasting the song continuously playing in my head at a feminist's rally on a boom box. I cannot be held responsible for my actions if my CCMI does not stop these shenanigans soon.

Frustrations aside, that red horse I had mentioned before is named Big Mac (Macintosh is his actual name). He had come to ask what I wanted for breakfast. I was rather confused at that, and had to ask why he wanted to know so late at night. As he informed me, it was neither late nor night; it was early in the morning, and time for him to start getting ready to work the fields. I understand "Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise," but is it not a bit extreme to be out before dawn? I have never been (or plan to be) a farmer, so I may be ignorant to some code or reason for being up so early.

I find it very hospitable of him to ask me that, and for the breakfast that the eldest among them prepared us this morning. They are the Apple family, and I can only guess as to why they are called that seeing as each name has something to do with apples so far – Applejack, Granny Smith, and Macintosh – those are three good examples right there.

The breakfast, I noticed, was missing a very common component of most meals that I am used to back on Terriel, meat. There was no bacon, ham, or steak. I am not entirely bothered by this, but seeing that most things presented were made of either wheat or apples, I see that the diet of these creatures is eerily similar to those of the livestock horses I am familiar with.

Apple turnovers happened to do fine as a breakfast substitute, since they insisted that I join them. They have a very forceful kind of hospitality here. I was almost afraid to say 'no', or else they might hogtie me again and force me to eat with them.

While being forced to listen to one of my old friends spout profanity and sex-driven lyrics in my head (I can be thankful that the volume is at least down so I can still concentrate), one might ask how I spent my day here. Did I search for a map that would show me how I might be able to get home? Did I seek out the wisest of these creatures and ask for their assistance? Did I pack up my backpack and head out on my own search?

Not at all. I am spending my day in a desk at school.

There is a young one on this farm, and her name is Applebloom. She had been very interested in drilling me with questions when I was sitting at their table. Applejack, her older sister I assume, had to keep telling the filly to leave me alone and to stop staring at me when she was no longer asking questions. I didn't mind all that much. In my opinion, she's absolutely adorable, even if she is a firecracker. The question, "What happened to your face to make it all short like that?" made me laugh a bit, and I told her it was because Rainbow had kicked my face hard enough that it turned flat yesterday -- sadly, I think she believed me.

The small yellow-coated horse caught me on my way back to the barn to collect my things and asked if I would come with her to class today. I refused at first, but I must admit that I have always been a bit of a sucker. It took nothing more than one look from her puppy-dog eyes and a begging, "Please?" to make me reconsider. She had mentioned that her teacher, Cheerilee (is that how it might be spelled?), is a “real smart lady”, so maybe it would not hurt for me to sit in for a day and ask some questions about this place? Information is a commodity I cannot afford to overlook right now.

I also was not allowed to ask Applejack if it was alright to do so, on the grounds that she would say no.

I was meant to be a surprise show-and-tell subject, though all I knew is that Applebloom had asked me to stand behind the schoolhouse in the shade until she “gave the signal' that I could walk in. I had assumed she needed to get her teacher's permission to ask for a guest to sit in, but it ends up that she was building hype for my entrance.

There was a mixed reaction when I stepped in and strode to the front of the class where Applebloom was motioning me over excitedly with her hoof. Some gasps of terror, a single shriek rang out, a few quiet mutters to each other hushed too low for me to understand the words, and I think I heard at least one "cool" from among the kids – wait, goats have kids; I suppose these would be foals. After telling them what she knew about me: That I was a human, that I was from a faraway place, and that I did not eat ponies. Applebloom asked me if I knew any tricks.

"I know one or two. Does anyone have a deck of cards I may borrow?"

I evidently startled everyone in the class, including the adult fuchsia pony at the desk behind me who gasped in shock, when I spoke. This lead to her stepping forward and apologizing for Applebloom using me as a spectacle, and motioning to Applebloom to sit down (assuring her that she would still get credit for this presentation). I asked if I could stay for a bit and observe, since I was new to the area and hoped to learn something. She was a bit wary of my request at first but said it would be alright and allowed me to have a seat in the back corner of the room.

It happens that nobody had a deck of cards, so I was not able to do a trick for them.

I feel like Cheerilee might have to ask me to leave soon, as it seems to be difficult for her to keep the foals' attention with me back here jotting down my thoughts and notes. I suppose it would be fine since they are going over basic arithmetic today: Multiplication tables to be exact. I was hoping for geography, history, political science, economics, etc, but sadly not. I am here on the one day that they are covering the subject that will not help me in the slightest. Perhaps they will change subjects to something more helpful before the school day is over?

... She put the line in the wrong place on one of those equations. That says "3 / x4", not "3 * 4". I'm sure she'll notice soon.

She has yet to notice.

She's not going to notice.