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Entry 5: (Summer 76th, 1010PNM) Cunnilingus, Romance, Light domination, Foursome, Rarity, PoV Guy, Drama

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76th of Summer, 1010 PN

Diary,
It’s been... Well, months since I wrote in you last. You’ve been... well, I’ll get to that. I’ll get to how you’re the last place I can trust, too. I’m sorry for not writing in such a long time. A lot has happened in four months. Summer has been predictably hard. The torn up gardens have gotten worse, and I’m beginning to think I’ve figured out the culprit. I need more evidence to confirm my suspicions. Rarity is getting along in her pregnancy. Seven and a half months along, by my counting. I’ve told her that her due date is the 37th of Fall. Nine months seems like such a long time. It’s hard to pin down, but I’m basing it largely off of when she told me she was expecting... It could be a couple weeks sooner as a result. 37th is a conservative estimate. I’m babbling again. I’m not telling the story properly. I need to tell you the story of the last two days. I need to start at yesterday, and I need... somepony to listen. Please listen, Diary. Please.

Things were going downhill when I got my customary knock on the door hours earlier than usual. I have to admit, I don’t like being woken up early in the morning to treat torn-up gardens, but the case is genuinely curious. I’ve never seen earth ponies so mystified. They’ve been talking in quiet circles about how the ground itself is being poisoned by the digging. It seems superstitious to me. I roll over and stuff a pillow over my head. If I keep helping, the ground won’t give a seedling next year. Magic eats the heart out of the earth. If earth ponies are baffled, I’m not sure how I can keep helping in good conscience.

The knocking at the door becomes more insistent. Somewhere, I can hear a pony begging for help. It must be loud if it’s getting through my door and up my stairs. Next to me Dash stirs, and I know I’m not going to get out of this anymore. If she’s awake, she’ll make me see to it. I feel her grope around until she gets a hoof-full of my mane. I try to wriggle out of her grip before she can tug playfully at it.

“C’mon Twi... just go see what they want.”

I twist in my sheets. There are voices downstairs now. They let themselves into my home? They-

I look over at my bed partner. She looks at me through a haze of sleep for a second more before we’re on the same page. I watch all traces of exhaustion vanish from her face in seconds. They’re in my house. Screw trespassing, if they find us in bed together...

I hear them call for me from the bottom of the stairs. There’s a lot. I can hear somepony crying. What in Starswirl’s name is going on in this town?

I feel a kick at my back and I’m dumped out of bed as gently as possible by the rainbow maned mare I was just snuggled against minutes ago. She’s up in the air and looking for a way out. Her voice comes out a hushed whisper.

“There’s a lot of them...”

“Why would they let themselves into my house?”

“Obviously a big deal. Big deal. Bigger than torn up farms.”

I sigh and snuggle against her stomach as she hovers effortlessly next to me, wings not making a sound as they beat a gentle breeze onto me. She’s pressed herself against the wall to avoid being seen.

“I don’t want to... I want to stay... asleep.”

She flies up out of my reach.

“Go down there before they come up here!”

I hear my name called again and I try to run a brush through my mane before I’m unceremoniously nudged with a hoof. I finally give up on the hopes of climbing back into bed and start for the stairs.

I make it down them just as a slew of earth ponies are coming up to find me.

“I... Hi, everyone. It’s early...”

I look outside. Sun’s on the horizon, but it’s not up yet. Early is an understatement.

“Please!”

The one word sets off a spark of shouting and begging and pulling at me. I’m half dragged out of my house by the mob in seconds.

“Found him like this when we got up for chores!”

“Just won’t move!”

“Please!”

I try to gather some clues, but all of my questions are drowned out by general crowd noise. It looks like several farmer pony families have grouped up to find me. Everyone from their oldest to their youngest are trading theories on “poor Junebug”. I can’t figure out the half of what’s happened to Junebug until they stop at the gates of a completely ravaged farmhouse.

The ground around it has been torn. Giant claws, the same as all the times before. Fences are broken and twisted as if they were playthings. There’s still some heat to the ground that has nothing to do with the hot summer morning. Dawn is coming as I focus on bringing light to the farm. Magic has been coming easily for months now. Since my last writing, I’ve not had a single “episode”. The coolness of my will is a hoof’s breadth away, and I dip into it and summon up enough light to see the damage further.

In the middle of all of the torn up earth is a statue of a pony. I recognize her. Junebug has been turned to stone.
Pieces start falling together immediately. After roughly six months of looking for clues other than clawmarks, we have our first one. It’s starting to make sense, too. The ground really is being poisoned. There’s a basilisk coming to Ponyville.

I search my brain for facts from magical creature texts. Poisonous claws can easily kill a pony without treatment. They tend to keep to wilder lands, and there’s no real cure for their bite. They kill the very earth by walking and breathing on it, and they’ll kill anypony who looks directly at them. If Junebug is a statue, she’s been very lucky. I look around for the source of her savior, and I find it. The shovel she was keeping glimmers reflectively in my light... Why carry it? To protect herself? Was she keeping watch? Too bold. I’ll have to talk to the earth ponies about being more careful. For now, my mind goes to remedies.

She has hours before the stone is permanent. I have no idea how long ago it happened, but... The Equestrian Basilisk doesn’t hunt in the day. Its gaze has no power under the sun. Legend says it’s been cursed by the Princess of the Sun herself. The sun’s rays will bring this pony back to life, if enough time hasn’t passed.

I risk a glance up to the sky. Depending on how long ago it happened, she has either minutes or hours. I turn to find a crowd of ponies cowering outside the wreckage of the fences, waiting for me to speak to them.
I say a quick apology to Junebug before summoning up more light. I need to protect these ponies first. If the Basilisk is still around, I need to drive it off. I fire the light into the air and it bursts into blinding bloom, an unfolding rose of shining light. It won’t save Junebug, but it might protect the rest of the ponies.

I can finally direct my attention to the crowd. I instruct them to close their eyes before I begin.

“How long ago did you find her like this?”

There’s some murmuring before a little colt is pushed up to the front. He has a surprisingly deep voice, but he can’t be more than fifteen or sixteen.

“She and I were meant tah be findin’ what’s been huntin’ our gardens. I went tah trade watch with her an hour ago an’ found her like this.”

“How long has she been on watch?”

He looks nervously around and then remembers to clench his eyes shut again.

“Two hours? Three? I kinda overslept a liddle.”

I nod. If he’s telling the truth, his sister will probably live.

“We need to push her out to where the sun can get to her immediately. If you’re right, it should turn her back.”

Should. I prepare myself for an explanation if it doesn’t. There’s no saving her if it doesn’t. Two hours is the regular dawn-reversion time. Three is pushing it. And speaking of pushing it...

No ponies have crossed the line. Even her brother looks at Junebug with fear behind half-lidded eyes. I try to push her a little further on my own before giving up. She’s just too heavy to move alone. The enchanted stone around her interferes with everything. If a unicorn could cast a spell on the statues, there’d be no danger to them. A simple reversion spell would fix the problem, but the truth is... Unicorn magic just doesn’t affect them. What else am I forgetting? I heave again and prepare to start yelling at cowardly ponies when it doesn’t budge. Instead, I get a shout from the sky.

My flare has attracted Rainbow Dash.

I’m sure she’s just been following me this whole time, but now she has an excuse to touch down next to me.

“Hey, what gives with all this light? Ponies’r trying to sleep right now.”

Her eyes catch on the statue of Junebug and widen considerably.

“W-what’s this?”

“Junebug’s been turned to stone. We need to get her out into the street where the sunlight can get to her.”

Dash looks around at all the ponies not helping and frowns. None of them have their eyes closed anymore, all of them are looking to the new arrival.

“They’re just gonna watch us push her there?”

I shrug.

“They’re scared... of what did this to her.”

Dash looks around.

“Speaking of... it’s not still around, is it? Can we take it, if it is?”

I shake my head.

“If it’s what I think it is... no. Two ponies or ten... we wouldn’t stand a chance.”

“What the hay is it doing in Ponyville?”

“I don’t know. Tearing up gardens and turning ponies to stone!”

I sigh. Dash’s questions aren’t moving Junebug an inch... And they’re not helping me sort this out any faster. There’s more to Basilisks, I just know it. I try to remember, but the task at hand is distracting.

“Can you just help me push her into the street?”

“Help? Pshyeah. Hang on.”

She grips Junebug by the midsection and lifts. Visible strain enters her face, but the statue lifts from the ground.

“Alright... Where to?”

I’m genuinely shocked. I knew Rainbow Dash was strong, but...

“This way. Into the road. Top of that hill if you can. She needs to get sunlight as soon as possible.”

Other ponies are coming out of their homes now. Up the street, silhouetted against the dawn I can see dozens spilling out to watch.

I can’t help but feel a tug at the back of my mind... Something I’m forgetting.

“Uh, Twilight?”

I hear the sound of Junebug being set down, and turn to find Dash stuck to her. My partner’s hooves have begun to grey and crack.

“Dash?”

The stone spreads up her legs and onto her torso.

“Twilight? Please!”

I swallow. Please rise faster, sun.

She’s squirming against the stone as its first rays come over the ridge. There’s a deafening crack and a blinding light and when my vision clears, Dash is lying on Junebug.

Junebug’s family hurries over, and I scoop Dash up in magic and hurry her off.

“I need to check on Rainbow Dash!”

It’s a hasty excuse, but the other ponies are just too busy with Junebug to care.

By the time I get Dash into my home and get the door deadbolted, I’m out of breath. My lips lock to hers and I push her mane out of her face. She breaks the kiss with a daredevil’s grin.

“That was awesome, huh?”

I nod and kiss at her neck. She was awesome.

“Yeah... Just another day helping out ponies in Ponyville.”

I kiss a little higher.

“You’re a real hero, Rainbow Dash.”

“Yeah? I guess... well... You knew what to do though. I didn’t even know I could have been-”

“Me neither.”

“Huh?”

“I kinda... Forgot that part.”

She leans back before flashing that gutsy smile she’s famous for.

“Then I guess I really was awesome, huh?”

I kiss a little further up until I’m nibbling her ear. She yawns. It’s a little bit of a turn off.

“Well that’s... pleasant.”

“Sorry.”

I break the embrace and yawn myself before walking over to our bed.

“You’re not gonna, uhh... Finish?”

I shake my head and flop down onto the mattress. My eyes are beginning to burn.

“Not even a little? Jeez, I just saved somepony! Brave super cool Rainbow Dash isn’t a turn on?”

I laugh and open my legs for her to come cuddle.

“Watching you narrowly escape danger, sure... Turn on. Yawning in my face with morning breath? Eugh.”

“S’not that bad...”

“Spinach salad last night.Trust me. You’re that bad.”

She looks at the floor and her ears drop. I try to cover quickly.

“We’re both that bad. Look, I’m just... just really tired, that’s all.”

She smiles weakly and climbs into bed.

“Can I have kisses anyways?”

I grimace and kiss her. She snorts and looks away.

“Don’t bother then.”

“Rainbow c’mon... I’m just playing.”

I turn her face back to me. She’s pouting.

“Yeah, yeah... I-”

I rub a hoof along one of her legs and she stops talking with a sigh.

“Mmm... Look at these strong legs. And those big powerful wings.”

I keep playing to her ego as I rub a little more.

“You picked up Junebug like it was nothing... Could you carry me?”

I lead my hooves in a little further until they’re between her legs. My teasing her is starting to get to me... I can feel myself getting wet.

“Yeah... Yeah... where do you wanna go?”

I point up to my skylight.

“Y’wanna go back to my place? Thought you wanted to sleep.”

I twirl her mane in my hoof playfully, braiding locks of green and blue together.

“Mmmm.... Your bed’s so soft... Mine’s so hard... I don’t want hard.”

I smile. I’ve gotten a lot better at flirting thanks to her. I slide a hoof further up her leg until I’m touching her marehood. She’s already wet, and she moans softly as I rub a small circle over it.

“Well... Maybe a little hard. Back at your place?”

I pout my lips and withdraw the hoof, and she scoops me into her arms and takes off in a snap.

I wake up in her bed hours later, and I know I’m a mess. My mane’s tangled, my tail’s curling from the humidity in the clouds, and my coat is sticky and matted in patches where her pre-bedtime squirting got out of control. I lick at her nose until she stirs.

“Nnnhh... that’s not... that’s not how I wanna be woken up.”

I put on my best mask of innocence.

“How would you like to be woken up, hero of Ponyville?”

“Mnnn”

She rolls over and talks into the pillow. Her words come out a muffled mumble. I only catch a couple as she flexes. I watch the muscles in her butt shift and flex, and feel heat spread between my legs at the sight.

“Lick lower.”

I spread her legs and tease at her lower lips with my tongue. She’s still a mess from hours ago... In the afternoon sun that’s coming in her window, I can see the glistening of her wetness on her mattress. I squeeze one of her haunches and she arches her back until she can talk over her shoulder around the pillow.

“Sup?”

“We need to get ready... we have things to do today.”

She turns her head back into the pillow and her voice is distant once more.

“Done enough work.”

“Not work. Rarity’s invited all of us over for snacks and stories today. Remember?”

She sighs and rolls over.

“I wanna stay here with you. I never got you to... Y’know.”

As she hints at my lack of orgasm from our fun earlier, her voice dips into a playfulness that any other pony who knows her would find alien to Rainbow Dash. I know better though. This is a side nopony but me sees. This is my little Rainbow Dash. She’s kind and generous and hopelessly horny. She really gets off on being commanded to give me pleasure, and I haven’t indulged her in days.

“C’mon. Get your stuff together.”

She groans at my insistence.

“Can’t we at least get a quickie out of the way? You could use the magic help, right?”

I shake my head.

“You know I don’t. I haven’t needed it in months. I’m all better now! So get your stuff together sleepywings.”
She grumbles and steps under a cloud, reaching up and giving it a kick. Rainwater begins to pour down, and she ducks her mane under it.

“Gah. It’s so hot.”

I slide off the bed and over next to her.

“My cloudwalk spell doesn’t have much longer... Lemme go first.”

“Yeah, ok.”

I get the important parts out of the way, and escape with minimal amounts of groping. As I finally duck away from her searching hooves she rolls her eyes.

“We’re gonna do it tonight, ok?”

“Do what?”

She turns around in the shower, pointing an accusing hoof at my back half.

“You know... That. With the strapping down and the... You know.”

I pretend to act surprised.

“You like the strapping down? Maybe your princess will have to punish you by strapping you down less!”

She blushes profusely at her mistake.

“No no... I hate that stuff. It’s creepy, y’know? Please don’t do it tonight.”

“I don’t believe you. Maybe your princess will have to find other ways to punish and embarrass you.”

She looks up from shampooing her mane.

“Huh? What other ways?”

I grin and wiggle my hips, legs sliding apart.

“I’m not sure yet. We’ll find out eventually.”

The water turns off quickly and she pounces on me.

“C’mon Twilight. One for the road! Just a quickie?”

I ease her off me and she puts up no resistance. She’s hoping I’ll punish her for being too forward. I put it in a mental checklist. If I punish her every night, it might get stale... best to let it build up for a week and take it all out on her at once. She’ll like it that way more.

The sun’s high in the sky and we’ve missed the morning as we walk to Rarity’s apartment. Every pony we meet stops us to thank us or to ask questions that I can’t answer with perfect confidence yet. Now that I have an idea of the creature, I’ll have to make molds of its prints and compare them to books to be sure. Still, there’s no shortage of gratitude and curiosity in Ponyville. Different earth ponies demand to give Dash and I different gifts. We’re finally stopped a block away from the more urban half of our little country town by Junebug’s mother, Mayfly. She pulls us both into a hug and cries on us for a few minutes, and we let her. Dash even returns the hug and insists it was nothing. We’re not allowed to go until we’re given a very old looking necklace; a family heirloom. Mayfly insists we have to take it in her gratitude. The gems on it look like diamonds. It looks too valuable to part with, and I spend a good few minutes trying to refuse it. I make a mental note to flash it back to her later tonight. For now, we’ll have to say anything to go on our own way and let the town quiet down again.

At last, Rarity’s apartment comes into view. We make our way inside and up the stairs, past the rows of doors until we’re outside hers. I lean over and fix Rainbow’s mane a bit. When she reaches up to knock on the door, I stop her.

I always need a moment to collect myself before seeing Rarity these days. Dash confessed to me a long time ago her feelings for Rarity. “It’s a unicorn. Longtime friend.” She hadn’t had to say anymore, I just... knew. She’s apparently pined after Rarity her whole time in Ponyville, the same way I’ve spent my life watching an ageless immortal grow more beautiful. I bite my lip and think about it. I hate the closeness of this apartment. I knock after a deep breath, and the door clicks open after some fumbling with the lock. He fills the doorway, tall and silent as ever. With just a gesture, he indicates that we should come in. I can hear Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie laughing from inside.

I can smell baking already, and I take a place on Rarity’s couch. My last trip here was much more strict. I never got to notice how cushy and soft it was. Beside me Dash flops down and sinks into it, reclining with a sigh.

“Well. Welcome Twilight! Make yourself... more comfortable, Rainbow Dash.”

Rarity fills the room with a life only a pregnant mare can. It’s hard to take my eyes off of her. Seven months along, and she’s taken my advice about eating to heart. She’s finally put on more than a little pregnancy weight. For not the first and not the last time, I wonder what kind of child she’s carrying. Will it a be a foal, or will it be like him? Perhaps something as legendary as a centaur? Something strange, or simply something unique? Perhaps every trait is recessive on one side or dominant on another, and we’ll get an entirely normal foal or human. It’s impossible to tell at this point. Despite my misgivings moments ago, I can only smile a genuine and sincere smile at my friend. She’s taking on a responsibility that most of us only joked about so long ago. The first one of us to get married, the first one to adventure into having children... It puts what Dash and I did this morning to shame, to imagine that she’s going to bring life into this world, while we can only work tirelessly to protect the lives already in it.

I tune back in to find that Dash has struck up a conversation while I was miles away. Pinkie and Fluttershy are demanding all the details of our adventure this morning. Dash is halfway through the story when Applejack enters the room and takes a seat, and laughing and hellos are exchanged. She adjusts her hat as Rainbow insists she needs to start the story from the beginning. Everypony rolls their eyes and lets her launch back into an even more exaggerated tale of heroism. For just a minute, I feel like I’m back with the friends I’ve known for over a decade. We’re all enjoying each other’s company when the timer for brownies goes off. Applejack and Pinkie pie ask to help, but Rarity insists that her spouse has things taken care of. We can hear him clattering around in the kitchen as Dash’s tale of this morning reminds Fluttershy of her experience with a cockatrice so long ago.

I look the timid yellow pony over for a minute. If we have a Basalisk, could she handle it? Only if her stare was up to the job. I’ve been petrified by a cockatrice and rescued by her before... but basilisks are less forgiving. When they’re threatened, it’s not just a staring contest. The six ponies in here together might be able to tackle the creature though. Applejack says something, and by her tone of voice I can tell I’m meant to laugh. I continue thinking, socially acting on autopilot. I try to think of a way to ask for their help as Rarity excuses herself to go help in the kitchen. I realize as she goes that our six pony team will be down to five now. Pregnant or as a mother, she can’t do what she used to. We’ll miss her gutsy determination and sharp wit if we decide to tackle the basilisk alone. I have to remind myself that I’m not sure it is one. That we can’t go in without certainty, and that there’s no sense getting everypony worked up if it’s not one. Now isn’t the time to ask for their help.

I risk a glance over to the kitchen for a glimpse of the pony who I’ve seen kick a manticore in the jaw, but she’s disappeared from view. The countertops are in the way, but it doesn’t explain where her spouse has gotten to. It’s hard to believe I lose track of something so big so frequently. Normally I owe it to Dash distracting-

I feel a squeeze on my haunches. Rainbow has snuck a hoof under the back cushions. I can’t help blushing, but I beg my face not to show it before somepony notices. In spite of myself, I shift a bit so that she can get a better grip. I have to trust that she won’t do something dumb and get us caught, but she just strokes them softly, rhythmically. It’s a gentle brush of her hooves every now and then, reminding me that she’s there. I sneak a smile over to her while everypony’s talking. Rarity breaks us from our game by entering the room and handing us brownies with some excuse I don’t quite catch.

The others enjoy theirs first as Rainbow and I have to shift a little bit apart. There’s a chorus of compliments on the flavor. Dash and I take a bite, and I almost choke. The taste I know only from between Dash’s legs lingers in my mouth as I swallow. I can tell she knows it too... That somepony was getting more than a little dirty while baking. I can scarcely believe how the taste has carried over to the final product. It’s subtle... if I didn’t have my tongue inches into Rainbow Dash every night, I wouldn’t notice the flavor of mareparts accenting the brownies. It’s there though, and I exchange a quick glance with Dash before we hurry through ours as politely as possible, hoping not to embarrass our hostess.

The conversation moves back to adventure, but my thoughts remain fixed on the sky blue mare next to me. Did she enjoy Rarity’s taste? She’s certainly as aware of what we just ate as I am. I’m not sure how it happened, and I risk a glance at her husband’s hands. I wonder if they weren’t fooling around before he baked them... or if they were fooling around in the kitchen instead. I catch myself grinding my teeth. I didn’t expect to have to actively compete for Dash’s affection, but now... Do these brownies change anything?

Applejack’s the first to stretch and excuse herself for the time. Last to arrive, first to leave. Such is the life of a busy farm pony. I’m surprised when Pinkie and Fluttershy also get up with the necessary excuses. I guess we’ve all gotten older and busier than I’d thought. It’s no surprise when Rarity politely requests to walk everypony out. It is a surprise that she asks Dash and I to stay and clean up. As everypony else files out and the door clicks against the frame behind them, Dash looks over to me. Her voice is a very silent whisper.

“Did we just eat...”

I nod.

“Woah.”

I look around the small living room. For the first time, a thought enters my mind. Why would Rarity ask us to stay? Is it too paranoid to wonder if she caught that we recognized the taste? I shake my head and look over at Rainbow Dash. What if Rarity wants to... Ask us? What if Rainbow comes clean about her crush?

I stop the assault of what-ifs and look at the rainbow maned mare next to me. Dusk is coming, and the sun is directly on Rarity’s window. The light is fractured as it comes in, and a line of rainbow light rests on the side of Dash’s face. Rainbows on Rainbow... coming in at twilight.

It’s been on my mind a lot lately... What we have going on. Our dozens of dates in the past few months have gone off without our being caught. We’ve assumed the worst about Ponyville and getting caught, but now... What if they find out? Would Dash leave me, to spare herself the embarrassment? No. She’s too loyal, and too close for that. She might leave to spare me though.

I gulp as I realize I don’t want her to go. I love waking up next to her in the morning. Our little private jokes are perfect. She always gives me the right amount of space when I’m working. She’s not under my hooves all day, but she’s always in my arms at night. She lets me snuggle into hers when I’m scared. I realize that I’m scared now, and I wonder if she’ll take the risk of holding me.

I lean in.

“I’m scared, Rainbow.”

“Huh?”

“What if they... found us out?”

She frowns, and her hooves wrap around me and pull me closer.

“What makes you think they found us out?”

“I dunno. I worry. Would you leave me, if they did?”

She looks at me for a moment and then smiles.

“Me? I wouldn’t leave if you asked me.”

I kiss her. It’s a soft kiss, but it builds in passion as her hooves find their way to my mane. I let her ease me onto my back. The fact that this isn’t the time or place slips out of thought and mind. In my heart, we’ve already been found out. I turn my face so that she can kiss at my neck. My hoof sneaks between her legs, and my other finds her sides and eases her wings open. She spreads my legs, and I bump my head on the corner of the couch as I try to stifle a moan. It makes us both laugh a bit. We look around to make sure nopony’s back in the room, and she dips between my legs.

“I gotta have more than just a taste, y’know?”

I spread them a bit, and she giggles like a school filly. She’s kissing the outside of my marehood, every inch is licked or touched by her tongue and lips. My moans aren’t even quiet anymore. Dash comes up for air and I tell her that her princess demands she debase herself in public further.

“Dewhatsa huh?”

“Lick me until we get caught.”

“Oh. Duh!”

She does it, too. She licks and probes for whole minutes, and I don’t bother hiding my moans. The thrill of Rarity walking in at any minute and seeing me with Dash... with my Rainbow Dash... It almost drives me over the edge.

There’s a squeal of pleasure from the kitchen, and Dash stiffens against me. We both lie there for a minute, afraid to move. Were we hearing things? My echos? Dash shifts off me quickly, and I sit up properly. Nothing to see here.

Silence fills the room. I finally dare to ask.

“Rarity? Are you- Is someone there?”

She pops up from behind the cabinet, flanked by a very sheepish looking husband.

“I’m sorry girls. It’s just... you seemed like you were having so much fun and... Well it would be terribly rude to interrupt. Goodness knows how long you’ve been...”

Dash’s hoof brushes mine. It reminds my heart to start beating again. My throat has dried to the point that I want to reply, but I think only a croak would come out. My mind is racing, and I’m trying to not cry. How did we get so reckless? Damn hormones! Can I cover this up?

Rarity shifts uncomfortably in the silence.

“How... long you’ve been... together, unable to act. I just thought it would be a shame to spoil that.”

Somehow she’s made her way over to the couch, and she’s inches from Rainbow and I. I slip my hoof over Rainbow Dash’s. Is this it? I squeeze and she squeezes back. I can’t lose her here, not to Rarity.

“You girls know you can tell me anything... I wouldn’t- we wouldn’t tell a soul. We never will. You’ve my word as a lady.”

She stands there for a moment. He sighs behind her and moves to her side.

Is this it? Are we... not outed, then?

I breathe a sigh of relief. Dash manages to mumble a “thanks” and I just nod. I can hear the blood thundering through my body. It’s pulsing in my temples... everything seems shaky suddenly. Dash thanks her again, and looks at me. I smile a fake smile, and Dash eases her head around and kisses Rarity’s cheek.
My heart stops as I listen to the expecting unicorn sigh. I can’t believe my eyes. Dash eases in for another kiss on her cheek, and then another. Then their lips meet, and I’m frozen watching. I want to tear the room apart, but...

I look at the sad smile on Dash’s face. How long has she wanted this? How selfish am I for stopping it? Can she still be my Rainbow Dash if she does this? If we do this?

I try to slip up behind her as quietly as possible. My hoof slips between her legs and she slides off of Rarity with a grateful sigh. On the floor she spreads her wings and her legs, and I start to rub her gently. Rarity can join in... but I want my Dash.

I look over to find her locked in her husband’s embrace. I return to licking Dash down. As I work my way up to Dash’s lips with my own, I hear a soft moan come from Rarity. She’s leaning down, inches from me. She’s being penetrated by him, and her hooves paw at the carpet in front of me. I lean in and offer my lips to hers, and she takes them gratefully. Her lips and tongue are salty, and I break the kiss with a moan as Dash shifts under me to start licking. Unhindered by my mouth, Rarity’s own moans fill the apartment. Her lips meet mine again and the sounds of our lovemaking mingle between our lips. I feel them mash against mine with a rhythm that tells me he’s slamming her on the other side. Dash’s tongue works in deeper, and my insides tighten as the heat in my privates becomes unbearable. I cum like a crashing wave, and drop off of Rarity’s lips with a sigh. I look around for Dash, and she fills my vision, lips locking to mine.

She grips me tightly... we’re wrestling and fondling and kissing all at once. I realize as much as I like her, I hate what she’s done to me. I’m insanely jealous. I’m insanely horny. I’m insanely possessive. She’s driven me insane. At the end of the day, she just... has to be mine.

I decide to give her what only I can give. I slap her flank roughly and ease her back onto her side. In seconds my hoof is working with months of experience. Each rough circle is determined to make her cum with a vengeance, and she does just that. The resulting orgasm happens faster than she’d like, and she struggles to contain it. Her eyes fly open and she gives me a warning look, but I ignore it. She groans, trying to hold it back. My other hoof toys with her clit, and I know what’s coming just as surely as she’s trying to stop it. In seconds her body shaking orgasm gushes liquid across the room. The spray of her juices hits the floor, Rarity, and her husband as she writhes in my hooves and begs for more. When she’s finally stopped, we chance a look at Rarity. The mating scene that greets us has reached a frenzied pitch, and I lead Dash over. She’s always wanted this... this is her chance.

I lick a line first, to let her know it’s ok. Then I focus on kissing Rarity to keep her quiet. Dash’s tongue finds Rarity’s clit, and the next minute is spent trying to wrestle her still while she’s pounded, kissed, and eaten out simultaneously. By the time we’re done with her, her eyes have practically glazed over. The weight of her body flattens and jiggles as she flops onto her side, exhausted, and finally gasps out an invitation for Dash and I to stay the night and go out for breakfast tomorrow.
I look at Dash, and she smiles and shrugs. I suspect she’s looking for the ok, and I give it to her. In a minute, we’re helping Rarity into her bed and snuggling up to her. Beside me in the giant’s bed, Dash shifts uncomfortably. She’s cuddled up to Rarity’s side, and I let her have it. I know she wants it, but she finally turns to me instead. My heart slows down. Could it be that she’s still interested in me? This is her triumph. I choke back tears. This is the part where I lose what I worked for, and go back to being a reclusive bachelorette. I feel a tear trickle down my face as the giant and his wide wife sleep peacefully next to me. Dash shifts her position and looks at me again. When she sees the tear, she crawls over.
I dry my face. I can’t let her give this up because I’m getting attached and sentimental. I didn’t see it coming, and neither did she... but this is perfect. Her life’s ambition realized. She smiles and pulls me to her.

“You ok?”

I sniffle and nod.

She relaxes into the expansive, enormous bed and opens her legs for a hug. I laugh and a sob sneaks out. I’m in her arms before I can question it. I can’t be sure if this is really happening or not.
She shifts a bit and kisses my cheek. I move to kiss her lips, but she turns her head with a sad smile.

“You’re ok. Let’s get some sleep, huh?”

I manage to nod, numbness sneaking in where insecurity was reigning moments ago. I’m fooling myself. I’ve lost her. Pity aside, our little dream life is coming to an end. I should have known it always would.
The next morning we’re called to breakfast. Rarity’s shooing her husband around the small apartment and asking him if he’s got his wallet, but she sticks her head in the door to tell us we’re all going out to breakfast. I roll over and find Dash across the bed from me. Outside the bedroom I hear the giant stumbling around. He’s a lot less quiet in his own home.
He’s getting his shoes on by the time we’ve combed our manes and made ourselves presentable. Rarity dotes on us as we lock up the apartment and my heart aches as she looks us over and declares us the loveliest of couples. If only she knew that we were a couple of convenience.

Breakfast is quiet for the most part. Rarity does her best to respect our secrecy. Maybe she thinks she’s doing us a favor as she invites us out to dinner that night. We try to politely decline, but she won’t hear of it.

“Come now. We’ve all day to prepare for a very fine night out. You two really should go out and get some fresh air once and a while... There’s nothing wrong with going out with some friends.”

Dash rolls her eyes at Rarity’s subtlety, but as she does she catches mine. Suddenly she’s all smiles.
“Yeah. That sounds good! Right Twi?”

I nod.

It’s going to be a long night.

The morning’s turning to afternoon as we head back to my Library together. I don’t dare say a word while we walk back. I wonder if I should tell her to go home and leave me be. I certainly feel like sulking a bit. I’m surprised when we arrive, and Dash closes the door and flops to the floor immediately with a sigh.

“H-hey Twilight.”

My voice is harder than I mean for it to be.

“What’s, uhhh... What’s wrong?”

I stumble for a way to say it practically. I’ve been turning “what’s wrong” in my head over and over all morning. I’m still not sure I can express it coherently, but I try.

“I’ve just... gotten used to all this. It feels weird that it’s going to change.”

“Huh? Why should it change?”

“Because you... you don’t want it to change?”

She looks around, messing with her mane.

“...No. Rarity’s nice and all, but... I like us. I thought you wanted...”

I’m not sure where the sudden energy comes from, but a cloud lifts very suddenly. Her voice comes out uncertain.

“So... then what was last night?”

She looks around. She was on the verge of saying more, but she’s stopped now. I tread for both of us.

“Whatever you’re ok with it being I guess. Small changes are cool and stuff but... I don’t wanna change this too much.”

I pull her into a hug. She can have her fill of Rarity whenever... well, when she can get it. I promise her I’ll try not to be too jealous.

“You’re jealous of me and Rarity?”

I nod.

“But I thought you liked... somepony.”

I think for a minute. My thoughts wander, but I just can’t get them together. There’s other things popping up. Built in warning messages. I’m getting very distracted.

“Tonight.”

“Huh?”

“Tonight. We have to get ready for tonight. You should... go home and get ready. I know I’ll need some time myself.”

I dig for the excuse as best I can without being rude.

“You can stay if you want, but I’m just gonna be doing boring stuff getting ready for tonight y’know?”

“Oh... ok. Well, I like watching you do boring stuff.”

I nod.

“Ok... ok that’s good. I’m gonna go shower.”

“Huh. Ok... I guess I’ll head home, unless you want some... company?”

I shake my head. There’s no way to try to hide it.

“Dash... a lot happened last night. I need time to think.”

Her face falls and she looks at the floor..

“Oh. Ok. I’ll come back in a couple hours to see how things are going then?”

“Pick me up an hour early. We can give each other the once over to make sure we’re presentable.”

“Ok...”

I turn to head into the bathroom, and Dash stops halfway out my skylight.

“Hey Twilight.”

I try not to grind my teeth as I turn.

“Yes, Rainbow?”

Her voice quivers as she hovers there, refusing to meet my eyes despite all the distance between us.

“Don’t dump me, please? We can figure all this out in a way that isn’t... weird. I don’t think I want us to be over.”

And she’s gone then, leaving my head swimming.

She doesn’t want us to be over? She’s got Rarity at the tip of her hooves, and she still wants to stay with me? Does she not think she can do it, or... Is she picking me?

I’m rushing down the stairs and out the door before I can stop myself. If I stopped to think, I wouldn’t bother, there’s no way I could catch Rainbow Dash when she’s flying. As it stands, I almost slam into her as I burst out the door of the Library calling for her.

She’s sitting on the ground outside my door sniffling. She looks up as I narrowly miss her with the door and shout at the sky. Our eyes meet, and I yank her back into the library after making sure nopony is looking. I wipe her eyes without caring if she knows I caught her crying.

“I have something you can wear. Stay with me this afternoon.”

She sniffles.

“I don’t want things to change Twilight... Why? I’m sorry... Why don’t I want them to change?”

I kiss her.

“I don’t think I want them to either.”

We hop into the shower together, and she soaps up my mane for me. I slide down onto the floor and let her do it. I need to think, and this is relaxing.

“You thinking ok with me here?”

She sounds happy. I decide to push it.

“Yeah. You sound like you’re in a good mood. You feeling better now?”

She nods.

“I like being here with you like this, Twilight. It’s... it’s really nice. I can’t speak for everypony, but I’d trade a day of this for a lifetime of touch and go sharing with a pony like Rarity.”

My thoughts start to coalesce.

“You’ve realized you can’t ever really have her... so you’ll settle for me.”

“Twilight, it’s not like...”

I straighten up and gently ease her hooves aside.

“It’s ok... I don’t mind I guess. I like being with you.”

“You like being with me?”

She sounds so surprised. I trudge into the painful truth.

“Dash... I’ll never get a chance to truly be with the pony I’ve spent all this time looking at either. If this is the best we can get, why not enjoy it?”

She looks at the floor.

“It was never Rarity for me.”

I stop washing out my mane and look at her.

“What?”

“It was you... I was gonna admit it to you that night. When I said I was in love with an old friend who was a unicorn.”

I slump down in the shower and listen to her spill out her heart. Every word is a shock to me.

“I’ve liked you for... for a really long time, Twilight. It’s never been about Rarity. Since I first messed up your mane, since I grabbed you at the fallen bridge on the quest to find the elements, since I first touched you... I’ve liked you. You’re a pony like me who gets things done... but you knew how to make yourself get them done. I was always about finding the fastest ways to get stuff done, but you... you were special like me, and you didn’t take short cuts. You never blew off all the normal stuff.”

I listen as she unfolds a decade’s longing.

“I wanted to be like that, so badly... When my chance to go audition for the Wonderbolts finally came... it was the same week you wrapped up your studies and decided to stay here. I couldn’t decide.”

Her tears are mixing with the water running down her face, and she keeps wiping it and rubbing her eyes. They’re getting puffy and red, and I ease her hooves into my lap so that she can finish her story without irritating them anymore.

“I had to stay here with you though... I’d never feel like this for another pony. But when I tried to tell you... I just... I chickened out. I thought it was obvious, but then you assumed Rarity, and then you admitted you liked somepony and I just went with it.”

She stops to look at me, and I can’t hide my shock. Her ears flatten against her head and she studies the shower drain intensely.

“I’ve been... rolling with it since then.”

I lean back in the shower. Pieces are coming together. They’re not all here yet, but it’s close enough for me to relax. I realize she’s waiting on me, and I pull her into a huge hug as I realize what it means. It means that what I’ve come to care about most in the last six months isn’t going anywhere unless I say so. I feel like an idiot for sitting there, mumbling nothing but thanks to the Princesses until she laughs and hugs me.

“You’ll stay my Dash, then?”

“Yeah... Will you stay my Twilight?”

I sigh and kiss her neck.

“Twi?”
My mind fills with pictures of my heart’s longest desire... images of Her pop to mind. Do I choose the princess who captured my heart, or the pegasus who stole it? I opt for the truth.

“I don’t know... let’s just keep going this way.”

She smiles at the concession.

“Mmk.”

Our spirits are high going into that night. I get into my finest gala dress, and Dash does the same. We put on perfume, we put on makeup, and we get into heels. It’s everything she hates. I promise when we get out we’ll go for a fly, as far as she can take us. She can set us on a mountainside, and we can look at the moon. We’ll sleep together up there. We’ll manage to navigate to dinner with Rarity, and excuse ourselves politely at the end. Sex under the stars a mile from anypony. The kind of thing she likes to do.

Dash smiles at the end of my rambling plan, and kisses my cheek.

“You’re a sap Twilight Sparkle. I love it.”

I cringe at the word love, but plod through it as we reach the door to the restaurant. Is love acceptable here? I can’t give her an answer... her love feels like pressure on me, and it feels unfair to her. I should bring it up tonight.

We’re able to laugh honestly that night. There’s accidents- a wine spill, some careless comments about Rarity’s weight, but honestly... it’s a true double date. Something I never would have thought all that time ago coming to terms with my sexuality that I’d get. I get to laugh and play with Dash’s hooves under the table while we pretend to be interested in what they have to say. We both get to think dirty thoughts of what we’ll do to each other when we get done with the evening, and know the other is thinking them. We get to join in honest conversations in between those thoughts. Rarity talks about her worries about pregnancy. Her husband goes through too much wine, and actually talks a bit. It’s shocking to hear his voice, so different from any of ours.

The night wears on, and we all settle for coffee and dessert. It’s a far cry from the youngest outings when we’d all go out together and take turns making the biggest spectacle of ourselves. It’s different from our early adult years when we all went out and drank together. We talk about both times, and everyone is suddenly conscious of the “today”- how far we’ve come. Things grow quiet, and Rarity self-consciously conquers dessert as Dash and I sip our coffee. I look over at her.

Years ago, I wouldn’t have expected to be the mare who drank too much with her. When I drank too much with her, I wouldn’t have expected to be the mare sleeping with her. When I slept with her, I never guessed I’d be sipping coffee, and asking myself... Can I honestly, really fall in love? Can I give my heart to her? Will those soft blue tones, that wild streak, that vast prismatic shine framing her face and tied back in a stylish bun hold my trust? Can I... Really, honestly stop running?

I could settle down with her. Here, in Ponyville. Rarity’s the first small step in coming out to our friends, and to this town that needs us so often. The ponies who hung their heirlooms around our necks and thanked us profusely love us. How unreasonable are our fears? Could we weather the occasional rejection together? I gulp.

These are thoughts I couldn’t have thought months ago, or even last night. Dash’s confession of love has freed me to honestly think about them. If we got found out, she wouldn’t leave me. She’s chased me so long. She’d be... proud. Could I be proud of this? Of us? I nudge her hoof under the table, and she smiles. The smile runs a heat through my body that has nothing to do with sex. I could be proud of her. I realize I already am. She’s a pony who conquered herself to be with me. How much we’ve both changed. The traits she admired in me have faded in the years. Now she kicks me out of bed to make sure I go to help ponies in the morning. Yet she still... says... she loves me.

I can feel her hoof slip against mine under the table cloth where it rests on my lap. She squeezes it. Across the table, Rarity’s far from sober husband recounts the same handful of bits for the third time before leaving them on the table plus a generous tip. As he rises, Rarity helps to steady him, and I study them. Could that be us? Not with the expecting a baby bit... I have no interest, and I doubt Rainbow does. She doesn’t seem the childbearing type. I realize I’m thinking about life after marriage with Rainbow Dash, and I blush in spite of myself. Still, as he stumbles to walk out and down the street, I think for a moment on it. Having somepony to walk home with every night, a guaranteed part of my life...
I look over to Rainbow. She rests a hoof on my back.
“Should we take off?”

I shake my head for a minute. I’ve spent the whole night in a daze.

“I need... to grab my stuff from my house. We should get a blanket in case it’s cold up there.”

She laughs and nods.

“What, my wings aren’t warm enough?”

“Not for those heights. Have you ever- of course you have. How can you possibly be
warm up there?”

She looks around as we walk.

“I dunno. It’s not that cold.”

“It’ll be warmer with two bodies under a blanket.”

I slip a wink in and give her my best bedroom eyes. Truth be told, I’ve been watching her flanks in that dress all night. I know it’s been designed to strip away for quick flights. I could have it off her in seconds. I lean in and whisper right into her ear.

“Think we could get a quickie in at my place first?”

She blushes in street light.

“Y’wanna have some sex to prep for some sex?”

I offer a coy smile.

“I wanna have the naughty stuff...”

My hoof slides up under the train of her dress.

“...before we do the sensitive stuff.”

I ease it into the joint of her wing and watch her eyes slowly lid.

“It’s all... naughty to me.”

She swerves out of the light almost drunkenly, and pulls me in for a kiss as soon as I follow her into the dark and out of sight.

“It’s always naughty to me.”

I return her rough kiss with my own.

“Always? What about soft and... sensual?”

“That’s so... sappy, Twi.”

I kiss her a little more gently.

“I like sappy.”

“Oh... Ok. We can do both.”

Her hooves slide my back legs apart, but I tuck and turn my body away.

“Not out here... Mmn. Not yet.”

I’m aching for her touch as we finish closing the distance to my home. We’re into the Library in seconds, and I strip away her dress. She pins my hooves to the wall as I try to get the last of it off.

“Now now... Let’s keep the naughty stuff out, actually.”

I squirm.

“You love the naughty stuff, Rainbow. You’re always begging for it.”

“Yeah, but that was before I knew...”

She brushes my lips gently.

“How much you loved the sappy stuff.”

I blush as she walks across the room to the stairs. How did she get so sensual?

“I’ll grab your blanket. Got anything else you need?”

I tell her I’ll slip into the kitchen for something incase we get hungry, and she nods before zipping up the stairs.

As soon as she’s out of sight I tear across the room like a horny school filly. Naughty, nice, it’s all going out the window. I can’t wait to get her hooves on me.

I stumble and hit my leg on a chair and go tumbling. Stupid. Not looking where I’m going. Pain lances into my left foreleg as I catch myself. I hit my coffee table roughly and lie there, dazed. The picture frames and mail that were on it settle onto the floor. Dash’s voice reaches me as I straighten them up, asking if I’m ok. I wince as my leg aches to move. It’s not broken, but there’s gonna be a hell of a bruise. I can already feel the muscles stiffening.

I shout up that I’m fine. Just too much wine, and I ran into the table in the dark.

My hoof finds the last picture frame, and I set it back down. Myself and the princess. I dip into the magic she taught me to ease the aching in my joints. I remember the way she’d look after me personally... I shake my head. My heart aches looking at her. It’s been a long time since I looked at her. I forgot how much... she affected me.

“Got the blanket, you got the-”

Dash looks down at me, and I look up at her and smile.

“You ok? You look hurt, Twi.”

I nod.

“I’m... a little hurt.”

“Where?”

“I mean I’m fine.”

She sets down next to me, determined to look me in the eyes and tell if I’m lying.

“You sure?”

“Just... thinking.”

Dash stiffens up.

“Don’t scare me like that. Can’t have my Twilight getting hurt.”

I try to quell the anger rising up. I feel like an idiot for going out and drinking and doing dumb things. I have studies. I have potential. How can I so easily forget the princess? How can I get so distracted?

“Your Twilight?”

“Huh? Yeah. I mean... I’m your Dash. Right?

“I never said I was your Twilight yet.”

She steps back a bit and looks at my front door.

“I know. I just figured... well, with Rarity not on your mind...”

“What’s Rarity got to do with this?”

As if on cue, a letter with Rarity’s seal pops into being next to me and drops to the ground.
Dash jumps, and so do I. I scoop it up before she can get to it.

“Twilight. Had an accident. Tripped and fell getting in the door. -==--==--= almost landed on me. Pushed me out of the way, but it was a very rough push. Feeling ok, but a bit scared. Please check on the baby?

-Rarity”

I pause and try to make out the name she scratched out in her hurry, but resolve myself to being better off not knowing. That she even wrote it without thinking and still sent it tells me she’s desperate.
I look to Rainbow Dash.

“I need to take this. I’ll only be a minute.”
I hurry up the stairs before she can say a word and grab some parchment and a quill to scribble a hasty reply. My thoughts are wrapped up in Dash right now. I don’t want to go anywhere with her anymore. I want to sit next to that picture downstairs until I figure all of this out.

“Rarity,

Check with the enclosed spell. You should get a pulsing at the end of your horn if you do it correctly. Lower the horn as close to your womb as possible. The spell should take care of the rest. It sounds like...”

I stop to think. I have no idea what their situation is, but I’ll try to be merciful.

“It sounds like he protected you and the foal very admirably. Don’t hold it against him, it was quick thinking.”

I curl up the letter and burst it into flames with a whip of my will. It vanishes into the night, and Dash clears her throat behind me.

“Am I always gonna come second, Twilight?”

She sounds sad, but it bugs me.

“It’s not always about you. Rarity really needed that.”

She looks up from the floor.

“Will it always be about Rarity? Can it ever be about me?”

My jaw drops. What is she talking about?

“I thought you said you didn’t have feelings for Rarity, Rainbow!”

“I don’t, but you do! I know you do. You write about that ‘royal white unicorn’ in all your poetry. I’m just asking... Can I ever be-”

My brain clicks and catches up at last.

“Royal white unicorn? Poetry- You... You’ve been reading my diary?”

She gulps.

“Yeah.”

I mentally fly through everything I’ve written as best I can. How much does she know? When did she read it? What has she read about herself? She could know everything!

“I read just the first little bit... then I felt real bad. But... You just kept getting sicker, and I didn’t-”

She hasn’t put the pieces together. I want to vanish. I realize I can easily just spark out of the house. I can go anywhere. I try to focus, but a wall of heat rises up in my mind. Not now... not now.

“I don’t love Rarity. How could you- How dare you look through my diary?”

“Twilight, don’t lie... I’m... I’m sorry. I-”

She notices the picture of the princess and I.

“Unless... Twilight, d’you-”

I try to dip into my will again, desperate to escape. I get a burning in my mind, and I take off running down the stairs instead.

She follows me, and I turn on her as we hit the bottom of the stairs. The heat hurts, but it’s steeled my resolve. She’s broken everything... my trust, my heart, my magic. I want her out.

“Get out of my house, Rainbow Dash.”

“I- No... No please.”

It’s the most pathetic tone a pony can manage, and it’s coming from the bravest one I know.

“Please... Let’s talk, Twilight.”

“No. You- You- I can’t believe you’d... Just get out!”

She shakes her head, tears running down her cheeks.

“I said I’d stick with you, that you couldn’t get rid of me. Just talk to me!”

I dip into my will, not to send myself away, but to send her away. The spell refuses to come. I force it to.

A sound like the tearing of thick wet cloth fills the library. Heat pours out of my body and the air grows dense. Every candle, every light for miles flicks out. I struggle to control the rebound. A maelstrom of wind and fire comes into being inches from me. I force it away. It flickers out and the room is deathly silent. I see Rainbow’s mouth move, but the air is too thick for sound now. It’s hard to breath. As suddenly as it came, the silence is filled with the roaring of flame. Magical sparks burst from my horn, and the spell goes off with a hundred times its force. Books are blasted off their shelves and onto opposing walls. My living room window bursts out, and Rainbow Dash is hurled out of it. My furniture splits and crashes against the walls. I struggle to control it, to push back the fire I know illuminates my eyes. I try to reach for the virtues that check my native element, but I can’t feel them. I don’t feel like a good pony. I feel like a failure. Thoughts of the princess assault my mind. Dark stormclouds fill my home, their magical sparks wracking my body with pain. I’m going to die here, trying to close this spell and save ponyville. I slouch in the air and let them start to consume me. It’s fine, I wasn’t doing much living.

Somewhere above the roar of the void left by my rebounded spell I hear a feral scream. The storm clouds are hurled out of my home with swift kicks before they can do any further damage. The whole dark room is a blur of colors. Rainbow Dash has returned for me. Her leg is twisted awkwardly from where she must have landed outside. Her side is a gaping wound from where she flew out my shattered window. I try to shout to her to run as she reaches out for me, but the spell gets the better of me. It’s determined to do what it was meant to do. My voice thunders eerily above the night.

“Get. Out!”

I wake up on the floor of my library and look desperately for Rainbow Dash. I don’t even know if she’s still alive after all of this. To date, there’s never been a magical rebound that hasn’t claimed a life. I take to my hooves and hurry out of the library. My leg is sore again, and I’m limping.

Dash is on the ground outside my house. She’s breathing, but it’s shallow. I pull her upright and focus on my magic. I need it. It has to work. Instead, it won’t come at all. I don’t even get the will of fire, I just reach out and touch... nothing.

I reach into myself, tap into my deeper magic. I reach into the element bound to me. I pull her back into my home, and I dip back into it. The will of fire roars at me, and I welcome it now. It will be the fourth time in my life I’ve dipped into the element without any of the others to hold onto it. I let the fire that normally rebounds my magic become my magic instead. My element, my soul... She can have it. I can’t have killed my only lover. The only pony who’s ever even tried to love me. I can’t... I can’t kill the pony that I...

Her eyes twitch and flicker. Her wounds heal. Her bones knit themselves back together. I can feel my very soul aging, but I pour as much as I need into her to make her live. She gasps and looks up at me. I smile weakly at her. She scrambles away from me, shocked. Tears streak her face.

She stares at me for a moment, then slowly she drinks in the destruction around us.

“Do you... really want me gone that badly?”

I look at her blood on my hooves, and I realize I spilled it. I’ve been inches from doing something like this for months.

I meet her eyes, and I steady my voice..

“Yes.”

She swallows audibly, and nods. Without another word, she runs out of my home. The wind slams my door shut behind her.

I curl up on the floor, her blood on my hooves, and sob into the night.