-Surgical Feelings-

        Lightning lit up the darkness of the storm, casting Coalback in an otherworldly light. Thunder boomed almost instantly afterward, wind and rain flew through the door and into the cottage.

        Coalback’s shoulder was covered in gore, bare bone surrounded by shredded flesh. A spear shaft protruded out from his flank, the shaft broken off into a splintered point. He stared ahead blankly, his eyes reflecting the light of the lanterns and making them glow.

        “Coalback!” Rainbow said, moving forward to him. But she balked when he moved himself, taking two steps forward and collapsing onto the wood floor of the cottage.

His breathing was ragged, shaking his entire body with the movements of his chest. Rainbow quickly closed the door, she could hear the fillies scream in terror, and heard Fluttershy giving out orders in rapid fire.

“Applejack, hold him down! Don’t let him move his legs anymore. Pinkie, go get my first-aid kit!” Fluttershy said in a voice that was not at all like her normal quietness. Pinkie saluted stiffly and ran off to another part of the cottage. Applejack quickly wrapped herself over Coalback’s legs, carefully avoiding his claws. “Rarity, get some blankets and towels!” The unicorn rushed off as well, clearly shaken by the sudden entrance. “Rainbow, come hold his head, try to calm him down.” Fluttershy said, putting her hooves around the shaft that stuck out of his flank, drawing a yelp from Coalback.

Rainbow dropped down, wrapping her hooves around his head. His ragged breathing grew more desperate, whines and whimpers coming from his throat. He turned his head toward her, defying her efforts to hold him still. The whines continued as he desperately began to lick her chest, his broad tongue sliding over the nearly healed wound.

“Coalback-” Rainbow’s voice caught in her throat for a moment, taken back by his sudden onslaught of doggy-kisses. “Stop moving, Coalback. You have to stay calm okay, we’re trying to help you!” She said, gripping his head as he moved upward to lick at her chin and neck.

“I’m sorry!” He said between licks, sobbing evident in his voice. “I’m so sorry! There are no words!” He spoke desperately, his sobs finally cutting off anything intelligible.

Pinkie arrived only seconds after she had left, suddenly dressed in a nurse costume. She dropped the humongous case in her mouth, the large cross black in the darkness. Rarity came in, a pile of blankets, cloths and towels floating in her magical aura.

“Rarity, spread the blankets over him carefully, I think he’s gone into shock. Make sure not to irritate any of his wounds too much, and start to dry him off.” Fluttershy said turning to Pinkie. “Pinkie, I need disinfectant and a surgical spreader so that I can pull this out without furthering the wound too much.” Pinkie started to dig through the pack, pulling out a bottle and a long silver pair of locking pliers.

“These?” She asked, Fluttershy nodded an affirmative.

“Pour some disinfectant over the spreading end, then give them to me.” Fluttershy said, keeping the shaft supported with her hooves. “Rarity, put some cloths on his shoulder and apply pressure.” She said, turning back to the unicorn as she finished spreading a blanket over Coalback.

Rarity floated over the piles of white cloths, carefully folding them into wide squares and pressing them against the wounds in his shoulder, immediately staining them a dark crimson.

Coalback yelped again, pulling his head and Rainbow Dash to the floor. His breathing grew more desperate, starting to wheeze in his lungs as he did. Rarity gagged audibly, turning to the fillies in the corner.

They were surrounded by shivering animals, all staring toward them as they tried to help Coalback. “Just stay right over there, girls!” Rarity called to them. “You’re doing a good job keeping those animals calm.” She tried to reassure them, continuing the pressure on Coalback’s shoulder.

Coalback whined again, this time more in pain than anything else. His head lay flat on the floor, and Rainbow Dash had the chance to look over his wounds.

It was as if his whole shoulder was simply gone. Bits of the shredded muscle hung out from the hole, revealing his white bones. She could even see his lungs pumping away to keep air flowing into him. Red blood flowed, streaks of black highlighting it and making it look like a flowing river.

She resisted the urge to empty her stomach right there, the sight being nearly too much for her. Rarity quickly covered the wounded area, the cloth alight with her aura as she applied pressure against the bleeding.

Coalback shivered under Rainbow Dash. She looked back, seeing Fluttershy place the plier-like tool into the wound beside the shaft of spear and spreading the flesh apart. The spearhead simply fell out, Coalback’s contracting muscles no longer pinning it in place. Blood poured like a fountain from the newly cleared wound.

“Rarity! Get more cloths over here, we need to stop the bleeding!” Fluttershy said, Rarity reacted instantly. She placed a thickly folded cloth over the new wound, pressing hard with her magic. “Pinkie, get out the scalpel and the needle-nosed pliers that are in there. Once that’s done, disinfect them like before. Then I need the curved needle that’s in there, and the thread as well.” She moved forward, coming to a slash across his shoulders and pearing in.

Glinting in the dim light was a small piece of silver, the sharp edges cutting further into Coalback with every movement of his chest. The flesh around it blistered and burned as if it were red hot and not cold metal.

Pinkie handed Fluttershy the pliers, disinfecting the other tools as well. Fluttershy didn’t wait a moment more, grasping the pliers in her teeth and moving toward the wound. She grasped the silver with the grip pattern on the iron pliers, a hissing sound like water on a stovetop filled the room as she pulled it out.

Coalback instantly relaxed, slumping onto the floor and bringing his breathing to a normal level. Everyone sighed with him, his breathing slowing to more comfortable pace and his muscles relaxing.

“Few!” Fluttershy said, relieved at his sudden relaxation. She dropped the piece of bloody silver into a dish that Pinkie produced, how she knew that Fluttershy would need it or where she had gotten it a complete mystery.

 “Now we can start stitching him up. Pinkie, we’ll start down here.” Fluttershy said pointing toward Coalback’s flank and the bloodied rags hanging there. “I’ll have to check each cut and make sure that it’s clean, so this is going to take a while. Rainbow, keep him talking, keep him awake.”

“The walls …” Coalback mumbled, his eyes only half open and staring into the distance. “The house is on fire … the ceiling is falling …” His eyes fluttered for a moment, his legs trying to move under Applejack, but they held him still as Fluttershy began  her work. “The bodies … everywhere …” He gasped for a moment, his breathing suddenly ragged.

“Wha’s happenin’ up there, Rainbow?” Applejack called from her struggle with Coalback’s weakened movements.

Rainbow opened one of his eyes with a hoof, taking a breath in as she did. His eyes swam in different colors; the green, yellow, and red flowing like paint clouding in water. “They’re arguing.” She said, gulping audibly.

“They’re what now? Who’s arguin’?” Applejack said in confusion.

“The-” Rainbow groaned in frustration, she hadn’t wanted to tell anyone about this. “He has these - voices, in his head. The wolf and … something else. Sometimes they argue in there and he has to fight them off. But last time it looked like a strobe-light, now it looks different. I don’t know if that means that he’s winning, or if he’s worse than ever!” She said, tears coming to her eyes.

“Stop them … must stop the sickness from spreading …” Coalback mumbled again, struggling against Applejack’s hold again. His breathing started coming out faster again. “My world, my life, my love … all gone …” A sob racked his body. “THEIR BLOOD IS ALL OVER ME!” He exclaimed suddenly, thrashing against Applejack and Rainbow as they tried to hold him still.

“Calm down, Coalback. Please!” Rainbow shouted, the storm and his struggling nearly making her words inaudible. Drool pooled from Coalback’s lips, his control completely gone in the wake of the internal struggle.

“By my claws! By my fangs! IT IS THEIR FLESH THAT FILLS OUR STOMACH!” He wailed, sobs racking his frame again. “End me! … END ME! What left is there for you to take from me!?” He sobbed loudly, his eyes forcefully closing. Tears slid unhindered down his face.

And then he stopped, his sobs becoming quiet whimpers. The crystal hanging from his neck glowed slightly, casting a dim glow onto the underside of his head. “But I am so tired …” He said softly, as if replying to a voice they could not hear. His face twisted into a weak scowl. “And why should I listen to you?” His voice was weak, even as he tried to defy whatever was speaking to him.

A small sound permeated the room, almost inaudible with the storm. But in a pause to the wind they heard it, another voice. “No … We must save our strength.” It whispered, the voice’s sudden presence made all of the ponies pause and look toward Coalback, and the crystal pulsing against his chest. “We must know … We must save our strength …” The voice died away, slowly drifting back into the sound of the storm outside.

“Luna’s moon!” Applejack said grmly. “Yah weren’t kiddin’ about tha voices, were ya?” She said.

“Don’t use that kind of language in front of the fillies!” Rarity said reflexively, but her eyes held the same sort of awe.

Coalback shifted his head slightly, opening his eyes a crack. “I remember when we hunted together ...” He said, his voice weak and his voice sad. “I remember when we ran together … I was so happy then …” He closed his eyes again, the ponies looking on with sadness and concern in their eyes. He was talking about his family.

“I even remember her laugh … I-” His voice cracked, and he took a shaky breath before he continued. “I remember how scared she was … of me …” A tear slid down his face and stopped in the crook of Rainbow’s arm. “And now I’ve hurt you.” He opened his eyes, training his gaze on her with surprisingly sudden focus. Tears formed trails from his eyes to the floor. “How could I possibly live, knowing that?” He said, finality in his words as he slowly closed his eyes again.

The ponies looked on with tears, Rainbow holding his head close to her. She took a ragged breath, her arms flexing as she pulled his head up from the floor. “Because …” She whispered, her mouth close to his ear. “... I forgive you … And …” She leaned her head down against his, her tears flowing down to mix with his. “... I … I love you.” She whispered, the words almost impossible to hear over the storm.

Coalback’s breath caught in his throat, his body suddenly tensing under her. A sound of cracking glass echoed in the room, the sound of the storm suddenly distant and unimportant. His eyes opened wide, filling with red light.

He twitched under her, the cloths on his shoulder falling away to reveal the huge wound. Muscles writhed, moving like snakes as the found their place again. Flesh rolled like a violent ocean, rolling forward to seal the wound again. And as soon as it started, it stopped. His shoulder still bled, but his bones and lungs no longer greeted the open air.

His eyes cleared again, looking at Rainbow Dash as she held onto him tightly. Her eyes were screwed shut, her face gleaming with tears. He leaned up, licking her face and clearing away the salty tears. She opened an eye a crack, the redness of her eyes revealed to him as he licked her cheek.

He stopped for a moment, untangling on of his paws from under Applejack, who simply sat in shock at what she had just seen. He wrapped the paw around Rainbow gently, pulling her closer to him as she continued to sob.

---

Coalback was lying in the main room, he hadn’t moved from that spot since he arrived. Fluttershy had insisted that he rest where he was, not wanting to reopen any of his wounds with too much movement. But he was not sleeping, his mind raced even as he clutched the mare resting beside him.

Rainbow Dash had refused to leave his side, so they had slept together, waiting out the storm. Fluttershy and the other ponies had gone upstairs, the animals finally calmed enough to return to their respective homes within the cottage.

Pillows and blankets had been wrapped around them, their bodies warming the soft fabrics. It was a scene that normally would have made Coalback happy, if not for his worries.

“Rainbow? Are you still awake?” He asked quietly, the pegasus pressed against his side turned over. Her rose eyes fell on him, concern warping their beautiful spheres.

“Yeah,” She said quietly, nuzzling against his neck gently, careful to avoid the bandages nearby. “What is it?” She asked, her eyes showing concern, encouraging him to continue.

“Did-” Coalback stopped for a moment, regretting the question he was about to ask. “Did you really mean what you said? About how you felt about me?” He said, his voice weighing down at the edge of tears again.

Rainbow sat up slightly, propping herself on her front hooves so that she could look at him fully. Her face was a mask of confusion and further concern, maybe even pained. “Of course I did.” She whispered defiantly. “Why in the name of Celestia, would I say something that I didn’t mean?” She asked, her voice almost turning accusatory.

Coalback pulled her close with his arm, hugging her tightly. “It’s just that … I’ve been taken advantage of before. And I had to be sure.” He said, sobs almost coming through in his voice. “And if I had known you felt the same way I did, I never would have left you. I would have stayed, and I would have fought off all of Equestria if I had to.” Rainbow looked intensely at him, seeing the tears brimming in his eyes.

“What do you mean, ‘taken advantage of’?” She said, her accusations suddenly falling.

“When I was young, my father asked me to go to a school. And my family was very rich, so when that news was known at the school, I suddenly had a lot more interest.” He said, shaking his head as he recounted his schooldays. “I suddenly had females lined up, all wanting to court me. But I discovered later, that all they ever wanted was my family’s money.”

His gaze fell, looking back at Rainbow Dash. “My father had kept the circumstances of my birth an extreme secret, no one outside the family knew I was a bastard child. So all of the school thought that I was to inherit my family’s fortunes, and many wanted a part of that. I never found out until I had already started to love them, and that always made it even more painful.”

He hugged her tighter, as if afraid she would simply disappear. “And I know,” He said quickly. “that you would have no reason at all to think like they did. But … I needed to know, Rainbow Dash. I need to know if you really want to be my Alpha with me.” He set his chin back down on the floor, even the strength to hold up his head gone.

Rainbow leaned forward, pressing her muzzle to the top of his head. She stayed there for a few moments, loving the closeness of the simple act. When she broke away, she nuzzled against the side of his head. “Coalback, I wouldn’t trade that for anything. Not even for full admission to the Wonderbolts! Yes, I do want to be your Alpha with you.” She paused for a moment, thinking. “That’s like, the top leaders of the pack, right?” She asked, looking in his eyes quizzically.

He nodded gently. “The Alpha pair is the male and female leaders of the pack. They are paired for life,” He returned her nuzzles, gently licking the underside of her chin. “and they make every decision for the pack together.” He finished, a warm smile on his face.

Rainbow leaned into him, enjoying his warmth and softness. “Yes, I want to be your Alpha.” She looked back at him, pain returning to her eyes. “I tried to join a herd once …” She said, leaning into him with sadness in her words.

“What does that mean?” Coalback asked, now placing concern in his voice.

“A herd is like … It’s like if you and I started dating, and then somepony else started dating us, together. Like a big group date eventually, you know?” She said, trying to explain it in a way that he might understand. “And it would sorta be like a pack, except there wouldn’t be ranks like in a pack, everyone is equal.”

She pushed against his chin with hers, bringing his head off the floor. “But none of the stallions liked me,” She continued, sadness returning to her voice. “They said I was a … skinny, over muscled, freak.” She finished burying her face in his neck. She cried silently, the painful words returning to her in waves.

Coalback gently licked the fur behind her ear, a surprisingly comforting gesture. He let her finish crying, and when her well of tears had finally dried, he spoke softly.

“I cannot see how they could possibly think that.” He said firmly, keeping his paw around her and holding her close to him. “First off, you are not skinny. You are sleek, and graceful. Skinny, in the way they are using it, usually refers to an … anorexic pony. Someone who doesn’t eat so that they can lose a lot of weight.” He leaned his head, putting a reassuring pressure against her head, which still hadn’t removed itself from the mane of his neck.

“And you are not ‘over-muscled’.” He said, his own anger at the word showing slightly in his words. “You are strong, and that is an admirable aspect in my culture.” He said gently, his words finally pulling her away from hiding in his fur.

“You really mean that?” She said, hope dancing in her eyes, overpowering the underlying pain of those memories.

Coalback smiled gently, leaning in close to whisper in her ear. “Why would I say something I didn’t mean?” He said, gentle teasing bringing a smile to her lips, if only for a moment.

“But what do you mean? Are mares … weaker where you’re from?” She asked, shaking her head as she met his gaze. “‘Cuz here, it’s usually the mare who fights for her stallion, and defends her stallion, and … just is overall the one who looks out for the group.” She said, her words trying to communicate to him. He nodded, understanding mixing with new questions in his mind.

“Where I come from, the culture is mostly monogamous. And many times, polygamy is illegal. And it is the male who protects his female, who fights for his female, who finds his mate among them.” He said, ignoring his own questions, and saving them for later.

“But that’s, like … completely backwards!” She said in surprise. “Almost everypony becomes part of a herd at one point …” She drifted off as she said that, remembering the last of the insults she had used as an example for him.

“But that’s just it isn’t it?” Coalback said gently, catching her change in mood and nuzzling her again. “You are not normal, by any means. You are too beautiful to be normal. You are too amazing to be normal. You are not like them, because you strive to be more!” He said, his voice rising in encouragement. “Just think,” He started again. “Most ponies would never dream of being a hero; saving not just her friends, not just her hometown, but her entire country from disaster.”

Coalback took a deep breath. “When I woke up, and that needle was hovering over me. It was you that stopped me from panicking. It was you that came back, and saw me not as a monster that had just killed a dragon. But as a pony, that had been trying to do the right thing.”

She looked up at him, tears forming at the edges of her vision. “Coalback-” Her voice caught, she couldn’t even explain the feelings that she had at the moment. It was like her heart had leapt into her throat in joy, refusing to move. “That was beautiful, Coalback. I-I don’t know what to say.” She leaned close to him, her joy almost overpowering her.

“Then don’t say anything.” He whispered, rolling onto his back and pulling her on top of him. “Just stay here, and don’t ever let me leave you alone again.” He leaned close to her, feeling her shiver against his chest. “Are you cold?” He asked, concern returning to him.

“No.” She answered quickly, clutching him closer with her hooves despite her knowing that she had to stop. “It’s just that- For the past few days I’ve been … I’ve-” But she stopped, Coalback gently rolling back onto his side as she heard hoofsteps, small hoofsteps.

Coalback raised his head to look at the stairs, his eyes caught the light of a dim lantern, reflecting against the back of his eyes and out into the darkness. His ears perked up, waiting for the pony to come fully down the stairs.

“Um …” A familiarly scratchy voice came, her hooves tapping lightly on the wood floor as she descended the final step. “Is it okay if I sleep with you, Coalback?” Scootaloo asked, her voice quiet and nervous as she looked to the floor. A pillow was balance precariously on her back, just barely held up by her tiny wings.

Coalback wagged his tail slowly, smiling gently to her. “Of course you can, Scootaloo. Come over here, pup.” He said gently, spreading his front legs out so that she could have more room. Rainbow pushed herself to the side, inviting Scootaloo to lay between them.

Scootaloo smiled nervously, but rushed over to them all the same. She climbed in between them, laying her head in line with Rainbow’s. A tiny smile was on her face, and she looked between the two happily.

Coalback stopped smiling, concern replacing the gentle encouragement that he had worn before. He nuzzled the back of her head with his nose, pushing her down onto her pillow. “Are you afraid of the storm, little pup?” He asked, his voice tinged with worry.

“Nah, nothin’ like that.” She said solemnly. Her happy demeanor dropping instantly. “Does it … ever get easier?” She asked sadly, tears starting to form in her eyes.

Coalback sighed sadly. “No.” He said, Rainbow looked at him in shock. That’s not what you’re supposed to tell fillies, not like this. And Scootaloo looked up at him in surprise as well, she had expected him to tell her that everything would be okay, that it wasn’t the end of the world.

“But, you will become stronger. And one day, you will look back at the days you spent with your father in such happiness, that that will be your pain, not in his passing.” He said gently, the encouragement returned in his voice. “I understand, that you lack the gravitas that only years of suffering can create. And you should never have to experience that. But trust me, that pain is your friend.

“Let it be what drives you to be great. Let his memory live on through you, and your children, and your children’s children. Your father deserves a legend to be told, and you will tell it to the world.” Coalback finished, looking into Scootaloo’s eyes, matching her pain with his own.

She darted forward, hugging onto his thin muzzle with her tiny legs. She cried against him, and he let her cry for as long as she needed to. It was important for those feelings to get out, or they could destroy her. “Let it out, cry as long as you need. This is part of the healing, and I will be here with you, the whole way.”

Her crying eventually died down, the only sound in the house besides the ever present storm being her sniffles. She took one final shaky breath before pulling away from Coalback.

She sniffed again, wiping at her eyes. “Uh … thanks.” She said, her face turning a shade darker as she recomposed herself. “Oh, heya Rainbow Dash. Didn’t see ya there.” She said nervously, looking around the room and rubbing the back of her neck.

Rainbow smiled gently. “That’s cool, squirt. I just got here anyway, I wanted to check up on Coalback. Fancy meeting you here.” She said, trying to save the little pride Scootaloo had left.

Scootaloo smiled sheepishly, the motion interrupted by a yawn. “You look tired, Scootaloo. And you will need your rest. Go to sleep, little pup.” Coalback whispered to her, looking up a Rainbow Dash. “We will keep watch.” Rainbow smiled at him, love washing through her again at the meeting of their eyes.

Scootaloo yawned again, putting her head back on the pillow. “Hey, Coalback?” She said sleepily. “Why do you keep calling us ‘pups’?” She punctuated her question with another yawn, opening her mouth wide as she did.

Coalback smiled sadly. “I had a niece like you once,” He said, watching her slowly fall asleep. His smile faded as her breathing grew steady with sleep. “it was my father that killed her.” He finished quietly.

Rainbow looked up at him, her breathing suddenly stopped in her throat. He met her gaze sadly, but a look of rigid determination made his eyes shine like polished stone. “And I will not let you meet a fate like her’s.”