Pinkie stood in the doorway of the post office, looking outside. She watched all the ponies walking by. Pinkie Pie heard something behind her. She looked back and saw that the unicorn at the front desk was making her way to the restrooms. Pinkie went back inside and followed her. The unicorn entered the ladies' room. She continued walking until she saw a leg sticking out from under the wall of a stall. She went to investigate and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw it. It was the mutilated body of a pony. She stepped back and turned to leave. She stopped when she saw Pinkie Pie standing in the doorway.
"Where do you think you're going?" asked Pinkie.
"Umm..." said the unicorn, frightened. "Uh..."
"Get over here." said Pinkie. The unicorn didn't move. "NOW!" Pinkie yelled. "Don't make me kill you, too." The unicorn slowly moved forward until she was in front of Pinkie. "Good girl."
"W-what are you going to d-do with m-me?" asked the unicorn.
"Do?" asked Pinkie. "Well, that all depends on you, of course."
"What do you mean?"
"Tell nopony about what you saw and I'll let you live." She started to head back towards the desk. "Follow me."
The unicorn followed Pinkie Pie, returning to her spot behind the counter. Pinkie leaned against the side.
"What do you want me to do?" asked the unicorn. "I'll do anything."
"I know you will." said Pinkie. "But first things first. What do I call you?"
"My name?" asked the unicorn. "M-my name is F-Fern."
"Fern, huh?" asked Pinkie. "You're gonna help me dispose of the body in the bathroom."
"Oh, no." said Fern. "I can't."
Pinkie Pie held Fern against the wall. "What was that?"
"N-nothing." said Fern. "I'll d-do it."
"But first," said Pinkie Pie. "Close the store."
There was a noise at the front of the post office. Pinkie Pie and Fern looked and saw a Royal Guard standing at the entrance. Pinkie Pie dove behind the counter to hide.
"Make him go away." Pinkie Pie whispered. "If you let him know I'm here, I'll kill you. Slowly."
Fern started to sweat as the guard approached.
"Excuse me, ma'am." said the guard. "Have you seen a pink pony around here?"
"There are many pink ponies." said Fern.
"This one's name is Pinkie. Has balloons for a cutie mark?"
"No." said Fern. "Sorry."
"Well, let somepony know as soon as you see her."
"Why?" asked Fern. "Is she dangerous?"
"Extremely." said the guard. "Let's just say that you wouldn't want to be anywhere near her unless you have a death wish."
"Oh." said Fern. "I'll definitely let you know."
"Thank you, ma'am." said the guard, leaving the building.
Pinkie Pie stepped out from behind the desk as Fern locked the front door.
"You did good." said Pinkie. "And just like the guard said...I'm dangerous. And if you don't have a death wish, I suggest you do what I say."