“A rock farm?!”

Dotted Line closed his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose with his hoof. Last week, he'd been perfectly relaxed on a white, sandy beach in the Fillyppines. Massaging his temple, he wondered if he had any of that special cider left in his cabinet. A session with Trixie always set his nerves on edge. As his heart palpitations began, Dotted Line drew a ragged, steadying breath and pushed the listing back across the table.

“Trixie, doll, you gotta see the opportunity here!” he said, grinning. That winning smile had won the contracts of Arnold Swarzeneighgar and Pony Bennett, and he trusted in its ability to win his toughest client over. “This is an untapped market. Croupersville is under-represented in the entertainment industry.”

“Do you take the Great and Powerful Trixie for a fool?” Trixie replied, crossing her legs tightly across her chest and glaring at her agent. “It’s ‘under-represented’ because there is nothing there!” Picking up the listing again, she tapped it lightly with a hoof. “Besides, it says here they need a ‘Day Laborer’. The Great and Powerful Trixie does not do labor. She also does not do days.”

“Doll, look at the bigger picture,” Dotted Line replied, eyeing the clock. It was already a half an hour past five o’ clock, but Trixie seemed determined to stay. “Sure, they’ll be expecting a laborer, but they’re gonna change their tunes when you roll up with that cart and blow their socks off!” He tried his winning smile again, while Trixie turned over the listing, hoping for any additional information she might have missed the first twelve times she had read it. “You’ll be breaking into a whole new territory!” His smile faltered as Trixie rose to her feet in front of him. Dotted Line shrank back into his chair as she loomed over him.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie does not want to break open new markets! She wants to see her name in lights in Manehattan and Hoss Angeles! Her star burns brightly, and it must shine in the grandest venues!” Slamming her hooves down on his day planner, she thrust her face inches from his own. “Where are the real offers?!”

“They are probably back in Ponyville!” Dotted Line growled. He had put up with Trixie’s attitude when she was pulling in the bits, but enough was enough. “I think you might have accidentally left them behind when you were busy destroying your credibility!” Trixie gasped, flinching from her agent, but Dotted Line came on relentlessly. Circling his desk, he flexed his tawny wings. It was long past the point when he should have been flying home. As Dotted Line paced behind her, Trixie sagged slowly back into her chair. “I had plenty of offers on the table before you let Princess Celestia’s protégé completely outclass you in front of a huge crowd!”

“But The Great and Powerful Trixie didn’t—”

“It doesn’t matter if you meant to duel her or not, doll!” Dotted Line grabbed Trixie's chin and forced her head up, nailing her to her seat with his piercing gaze. “The truth is, you’re damaged goods. I’ve farmed your name out to every club, convention, and faire in Equestria. No bites. Face it, doll. You’re washed up.” He released Trixie’s chin and she quickly turned away, determined not to let him see her cry. As her body began to shake, Dotted Line rolled his eyes and collapsed back into his chair.

“So… so it’s all o-over?” Trixie said between hiccupping sniffles.

“Let me level with you, Trixie. You’ve got ambition. You’ve got looks. You’ve got pizzazz. But you’ve got no heart. You see all these guys?” Dotted line swept his leg around the room and Trixie scanned the faces of Equestria’s most famous celebrities. “They got one thing in common. They’re people ponies. You, you love the fame, but you don’t love that audience. Until you get that love in your heart, you’re B-list at best and Z-list right now.”

Standing again, Dotted Line pushed the listing back across the desk and tapped the signature line with his hoof. “I’ve combed through the entertainment jobs for something for you and I’ve got nothing. You can’t cook. You won’t clean. I’ve tried to book you for motivational speaking on a ‘Your Life Is A Total Disaster But At Least You Aren’t Me’ tour, but the organizer said even they have some standards. When I say this is it, doll, I mean this is it.”

So it’s come to this, Trixie thought, slowly rolling Dotted Line’s pen between her hooves. The tiny diamonds on the cap twinkled as they caught the light, reminding Trixie of the bold flashes from the fireworks display she had once launched nightly from her cart. It’s all her fault! That Twilight Sparkle! The mere thought of her hated rival sent magic arcing from her horn straight into Dotted Line’s chest, leaving a small scorch mark. Distracted by the clock that he always seemed to be watching when she came in, he absently scratched at the light singe. That irritated her even more. How dare he ignore my power?! I’ll show them all! I’ll show them that I am the greatest performer Equestria has ever seen! Snatching the paper up, Trixie pretended to peruse the details again.

“Trixie has noticed a few particulars that she missed in her first reading,” Trixie said, running a hoof nonchalantly through her mane. “She finds this acceptable.” With a flourish, she signed her name to the bottom. Dotted Line pushed a large, green button on his intercom and it cracked to life.

“Yes, Mr. Line?” a tinny voice called out.

“Meadow, could you please collect this contract and send word along to...” Dotted Line twisted the contract back to him, squinting at it, “Mr. Pie?”

“At once, Mr. Line.” Trixie screwed the top back onto her mineral water and pushed it into her bag.
“Trixie should be off. Please arrange for her travel.”

“No can do,” Dotted Line replied, grimacing at the clock. “Travel expenses aren’t included.” Halfway through gathering her things, Trixie stopped and gaped at him.

“But how is The Great and Powerful Trixie to arrive at this ‘Rocky Road Farm’?”

“Doll, unless you have a better idea,” Dotted Line said, ushering Trixie outside, “I’d say by hoof.” Trixie winced as he slammed the door shut behind her. Taking a moment to straighten her hat, she thrust her nose high into the air as she made her way down the steps and onto the street, pretending not to see the passers-by who had stopped to see what the commotion was about.

Rocky Road Farm, prepare to be amaz—oh! Trixie gasped as she tumbled forward into a puddle of mud, her legs tangled in the spokes of a stagecoach wheel that had been left lying in the road. A grease-smeared stallion scurried out from beneath the broken axle of a nearby carriage. After wiping his hooves on his flank, he scooped up Trixie’s hat as he trotted over.

“Say, yous gotta be more careful, yeah?” he said, trying to vigorously shake the mud from her hat. Trixie waved him away as the mud rained down on her.

“Ugh! Give me that!” Trixie snapped, snatching her hat from the stallion and thrusting it back onto her head. She tried to ignore the rivulets of dirty water running down both sides of her face as she attempted to pry her stuck hoof from between the spokes.

“Yous betta let me help yous wit’ dat, lady,” the stallion said, grabbing her leg. Trixie cried in pain as he wrenched her hoof back and forth, grunting.

“Away, simpleton! Watch in amazement as The Great and Powerful Trixie dazzles you with her magical might! Begone, wheel! Trixie commands you!” Trixie’s chest swelled as she gathered her strength. Aiming her horn, she discharged a brightly glowing ball of pure magical energy at the wheel.

“Uh, lady—”

The ball hit the wheel, and it began twitching. Trixie’s eyes watered as it wrenched her hoof painfully as it tried to roll away.

“Ow!” Trixie whined, prying at the spokes. “Stop staring and help me!” With a shout, the stallion slammed his hoof into the wheel, shattering it. Trixie squealed in surprise and shielded her eyes from the flying splinters with a hoof, leaving a muddy, horseshoe-shaped stain on her forehead.

“About time!” Trixie said, drawing herself up with as much dignity as she could muster. Trying to ignore the mud dripping from her nose, she turned into the breeze, hoping to get it to catch her cape in a dramatic fashion. “The Great and Powerful Trixie has better things to do than play with you in the mud. Now, away with you!”

“Gee, lady, yous could be nicer, ya’ know. Now I gotta charge yous for dat wheel yous had me break.” Trixie’s eyes grew wide.

“Charge me for the wheel?! But I don’t have any… I mean, The Great and Powerful Trixie doesn’t handle such trivial details. Speak with her agent.” Quickening her pace, Trixie tried to ignore the snickers of the ponies who had stopped to watch the unfolding events. Just wait, all of you. In one week, Trixie rises again! You will be begging for the opportunity to wipe the mud from my hooves!

Author's Notes:

Special thanks to Metool Bard, Loeden, Statoose, Dragonas77, Admujica, and RazerWrites for their help proofreading and their opinions on this story.