So I learned many things today. Eight things, to be exact, if you disregard the things that don't matter. You might be wondering how I learned so many things in just one day when I was on a quest to save the world and not in school. Well, long story short: Ponies.

Yes, that's the abridged version. Ponies. You mad, bro (or sis)?

The first thing I learned today was that, of the six ponies and one dragon I was travelling with, the only one who knew more than the obvious basics about griffons was Rainbow Dash. She had a griffon friend back in flight school or something, but the others had either never encountered one in their life, or never been in the same vicinity as one for more than twenty minutes. Rainbow aside, all of us knew nothing about them aside from the fact that they were a cross between a lion and an eagle, could fly, and about seventy percent of them were aggressive.

The other thirty percent were dead.

The second and third things I learned came from Rainbow as she told us about these beasts as we walked. It annoyed me to no end to have her acting like a know-it-all, but at least we were getting some important information.

"Griffons are usually carnivores," she told us. "Some of them have learned to eat plants and fruits and stuff, but the majority of them prefer meat. So when they live in large groups, like this city – if you can call it a city – they usually send out about ten to fifteen griffons in the morning to hunt for the entire population."

"Well, that's gotta be the worst job ever," I commented. "How many griffons live on this mountain?"

"Mt. Griffon's population is roughly the same as Fillydelphia's, so...I'd say somewhere from two to three thousand," Twilight answered. I ran through the math in my head quickly.

"So a maximum of fifteen griffons have to hunt for a minimum of two thousand other griffons, getting each of them three meals every day, meaning each hunting griffon has to collect approximately four hundred meals worth of food every morning, and that's if they have the maximum number of hunters and minimum number of residents suggested." I shook my head. "Remind me not to become a griffon anytime soon."

"O...kay?" Twilight sounded confused, making me realize how dumb what I just said sounded. I ignored it, however, in favour of continuing to listen to Rainbow. This is where I learned the third thing.

"Plus, even though some ponies think they do, griffons don't actually eat ponies. They mainly prefer animals like deer, cows, and birds. In fact, there's actually a law that prevents griffons from eating ponies."

Well, good to know they're not at risk of being eaten, at least... I thought to myself. Good thing Fluttershy's not paying attention. She'd be freaking out from hearing about the animals griffons eat...

Sure enough, Fluttershy wasn't paying much attention to what Rainbow said. She was locked in her own conversation with Rarity, a few feet away. I was thankful for this. I may be a dick, but even I hate seeing Fluttershy cry. Either I'm not as big a jerk as I used to think, or Fluttershy's tears are just that powerful.

Anyway, back on track. We were rather close to the mountain – maybe half an hour to an hour of walking away – when I learned the fourth thing:

Griffons are very, very territorial.

Out of nowhere, we were suddenly attacked by a huge flock of feathers, claws, and beaks. I heard the others scream, and I yanked out my knives, having a feeling that I'd need to be quick and that Ihsoylr would slow me down greatly. Stabbing wildly, I eventually heard the rustling die down.

Looking around, I saw four griffons lying in front of us. They were alive, but cut up quite a bit. Most of their wounds were on their wings, but one griffon had a large scratch across its torso, and another had one of my knives literally stuck in its talon.

I glanced at my companions. They weren't exactly unharmed; all of them had at least a few scratches, but that wasn't the worst of it. Rarity had a huge gash on her chest and Spike had been knocked unconscious. However, as soon as I saw Rainbow, I almost forgot about the others.

Rainbow was still awake, but barely. Her left wing had been cut up and was bleeding so much, there was more red than blue. Her right wing was even worse, being almost completely ripped off and held on by little more than a single bone sticking out. The rest of her body wasn't much better off. It looked like she had taken the brunt of the ambush. The sight of her lying there, looking like she was mere minutes from death, triggered something inside of me.

The other mares quickly ran to Rainbow's side, but I marched up to the griffons. They looked up at me, and I grabbed two of them by the heads, slammed them together, and knocked them out. The third one tried to stand and run, but I grabbed it by the neck and threw it to the ground, knocking it out as well. I then turned to the fourth one, who gulped.

"You have two options," I growled at it. "Take us to Dyntos and get medical help for my friends, or I'll slaughter your entire kingdom."

The griffon blinked. "I don't think you could really-" It (well, he, according to his voice) was cut off by the feel of cold, sharp metal suddenly against his throat and the sight of my glaring eyes boring into his soul. "At once, sir. Please don't hurt me."

"Good birdie."

That was the fifth thing I learned that day. Griffons, when confronted by threatening creatures, were much bigger cowards than expected.

I think I'm going to like it here.

I hate it here.

The griffon, who said his name was Caboose, took us to Dyntos as I requested. The griffon civilians glared at us as we walked by at first, but after seeing the various wounds on Caboose and the three recently awakened griffons following fearfully behind us – as well as my glare as I casually twirled a bloodstained knife – they quickly turned away. I snorted in mild amusement.

After Caboose had explained the situation (and I demonstrated my violence on a few guards who tried to stop us), Dyntos reluctantly ordered a few doctors to take care of the others. However, he told me to stay behind.

I didn't trust him one bit, of course. They were taking away my wounded and weak friends to Celestia knows where and telling me not to follow. I expected them to at least be healed and stuff, but what next? I doubted Dyntos would let them go, considering his hatred of ponies. I wouldn't be surprised if I saw them in a dungeon a few hours later. However, not wanting to cause any more trouble, I obeyed. For now.

"What are you?" Dyntos asked as soon as the other griffons had left. He and I were the only ones in the room. I didn't know if that was good or bad.

"My name is Rylan Watch, and I am a human," I replied casually, still twirling my knife (it looked cool, okay?).

"I thought so. You're that little pest the princess summoned, aren't you?"

I stopped twirling my knife and looked at him. "You know of me?"

"Of course! News travels fast around Equestria." He chuckled lightly. "Have a seat, my boy. I mean you no harm."

Wait...we're actually going to get through here without trouble? Seriously?! What kind of story is this?!

I hesitantly sat down on a chair he motioned me to. No traps went off.

"If I may ask," I said, going back to my knife. "Why are you so...passive about this whole ordeal? I thought your opinions of ponies were...negative, to say the least."

"To say the least indeed," Dyntos grunted. "And believe me, offering to help them is like a large blow to my reputation. I only do it because of you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Because I'm amusing or threatening?"

"Both. You took down four hunting griffons without breaking a sweat, and you took on any one of us who even looked at you funny on your way here. While you may pose a threat to us, I feel less fearful and more..." He leaned forward with a grin. "Challenged."

In one fluid motion, I took my knife, tossed it into the air, used my now-free hand to facepalm, then caught the knife again.

"If you think I'm here to usurp your throne, you need your brain checked," I sighed. "Me and my companions are only on Mt. Griffon because we need to get through. Once the others are healed, we'll be content with walking through and away like we were never here."

Dyntos laughed. "And you think I would allow that?"

I shoved my knives away, stood up, and drew my sword in a threatening manner. "This answer your question?"

He laughed again. "Human, allow me to speak." I sat down, still holding Ihsoylr. "As you know, I'm not a fan of equines. I'm helping your friends because I can tell that if I don't, we griffons may go extinct long before intended." He leaned back. "However, that is already enough of a stain on my otherwise clean reputation. To let you go free after attacking my citizens would destroy it entirely."

I glared. "Your 'citizens' attacked us first, feathers! All we did was fight back in self defense! If anything, you owe us for this!"

Dyntos glared back. "You dare speak in such a manner to royalty?"

"Bitch, please. Let's use some logic." I got up and strolled around nonchalantly. "You are the ruler of Mt. Griffon. Mt. Griffon is a part of Equestria. Equestria is ruled by Princess Celestia. Therefore, Princess Celestia is of a higher authority than you." I examined my sword absentmindedly. "Now, about us humans. Guess what, feathers? The princesses bow to us. To me. I outrank those who outrank you. With that being the case, I think it's not exactly a topic of discussion as to how I speak to one who is less important than me." Yeah, I sounded like a jackass. But is that new? Nope.avi.

Dyntos seemed to be genuinely angry now. He got off his throne and walked over to me slowly, glaring the whole time. "Listen, you, and listen well," he ordered. "We don't serve your kind here, so I suggest you just leave now."

Someone's getting pissed. "You know, that's a pretty neat coincidence," I replied.

"Excuse me?!"

"You don't serve our kind here. I find that to be a neat coincidence..." I spun my sword into a better fighting stance and pulled off my shield. "Because we don't serve your kind either."

"Are you trying to instigate a fight?" Dyntos asked, quietly.

"More like I'm trying to instigate a certain bird to shut the hell up before I get dangerous." Before Dyntos could claw at me, I ducked, rolled, and held my sword at his throat. "Watch it, feathers."

"You wouldn't dare kill me," he growled.

"And you wouldn't dare kill me, correct?"

Dyntos didn't reply for a few seconds. "If it means the safety of my people, I do what is required."

"Well, killing me isn't required. Us getting through this town...city...kingdom...whatever the hell it is...is required. Unless you're fine with living under the rule of some evil tyrant."

"I suppose that would be undesirable..." he agreed. "Fine. Put away your weapon."

I sheathed my sword and faced him expectantly. I kept my shield out, just in case. I didn't trust this guy as far as Spike could throw him.

"I shall consider this decision for a while," he declared, returning to his throne. "You and your...companions...are welcome to stay here for the time being. Come see me tomorrow morning, and I shall tell you my decision."

I silently nodded, and he called for two guards to come. They escorted me out, and we began heading towards the hospital, where the others were.

So the sixth thing I learned that day was that, apparently, griffons could be reasoned with just as well as ponies. Especially if you had a sharp edge to persuade them with.

I sound so much like a villain right now it's almost not funny. Almost.

The night was spent in the hospital. Most of the others had healed, but Rainbow was still hurt badly. Her wing was badly damaged and would be difficult to attach properly again. All we could do was hope.

The next morning, I headed back to see Dyntos again. Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie stayed behind to wait for Rainbow, so Twilight, Spike, and Applejack came with me. Just in case.

As we were heading back to the castle, however, we were stopped by a small army of griffons that stood in our way.

"Excuse me, but we're heading to see Lord Dyntos," Twilight said politely.

"Lord Dyntos has ordered us to not allow anyone to see him today," one of the griffons proclaimed as he stepped forward. "He has also ordered us to find the ponies, dragon, and human in his city and kill them."

I blinked. "Wait, what?"

"These are merely our king's orders. We have nothing against you personally, but we have no choice. I am sure you understand." With that, the griffons suddenly shot forward, slamming into us and starting to attack.

Not wasting a moment, I pulled out my knives and stabbed the griffons around me, cutting up their wings, bodies, and faces. One was unlucky enough to get both knives in his throat. When I had a brief moment of peace, I looked around for Twilight, Spike, and Applejack. They were all separated.

Twilight and Applejack were having not too hard a time fighting off the griffons, but Spike wasn't faring too well. Being small and young, he couldn't fight back very well, though more than a few griffons had burn marks on them. Thinking fast, I charged forward into the griffons, knocking them over and giving Spike some more breathing room. We stood back-to-back, though due to his small size it was more like back-to-foot. I passed him my knives.

"You burn and cut the ones that come too close and I'll snipe the rest," I ordered as I pulled out my bow and arrows. "Get it? Got it? Good."

I began shooting arrows at all the griffons that tried to attack. I usually nailed them in the chest, but occasionally I would miss and hit their wing, or not even hit them at all. Fortunately, Spike made good use of his fire and my knives. He lit them on fire (somehow not melting the metal) for extra effect, and every time a griffon got too close to us, he'd slice at it and leave a large burning gash that caused the bird to retreat. I noticed he never made a fatal attack; he always aimed for their wings or feet. Can't really blame him. Kids were never meant to kill.

Eventually, I ran out of arrows, cursing under my breath. I put away the bow and pulled out Ihsoylr and my shield. I didn't have the range anymore, but I could still deal some damage. Finally, all the griffons fell, leaving me, Spike, Twilight, and Applejack standing in a pool of bird corpses.

The seventh thing I learned that day? Griffon blood smells awful.

"We need to go see Dyntos," I ordered, taking back my knives from Spike and putting the fire out. "Something's not right here."

We nodded and headed off, Spike climbing onto Twilight's back. Since we weren't in too much of a hurry now that the griffon army was dead or unconscious, I stopped to pick up as many arrows as I could. I'd have to remember to get some more somehow.

The throne room contained nobody but Dyntos, sitting in his throne. When we entered, he looked down at us in anger.

"How are you still alive?!" he demanded. "My army was supposed to take care of you!"

"Well, we took care of them," I replied, pointing my sword at him. "Now, tell us what's going on, or you're next."

Dyntos glared and charged forward at us.

"Wrong answer."

I twirled Ihsoylr so I was holding the blade behind me and thrust the handle out, smacking Dyntos in the face as soon as he got close. However, he barely flinched, clawing at my chest and leaving a giant rip in my shirt and skin before headbutting me, knocking me over.

"Rylan!" Twilight yelled before trying to hold Dyntos in place with a spell. It failed, as Dyntos fought hard against the spell and charged over to her next, kicking her to the ground. Applejack jumped in, but was fought off as well. I forced myself to my feet and pulled out my knives.

"Let's fight like gentlemen," I said coolly. He glared, flew above me, and dive-bombed me. I barely dodged. "That's not how you fight like a gentleman."

"I won't be defeated so easily!" he yelled. He pulled a sword out from behind him and charged at me. I used my shield to block him.

"What's going on with you?! You were a lot calmer than this yesterday!" I yelled over the sound of metal colliding with metal. "I thought you were going to let us pass through to, you know, save Equestria!"

"You are nothing but weak ponies and an alien who thinks he's a hero," Dyntos grunted. "Putting Equestria's fate on your shoulders is worse than leaving it be!"

I shoved him with my shield, causing him to stumble back. I didn't want to fight back just yet.

"These ponies are the Elements of Harmony and have saved Equestria at least three times in the past! And I'm a human, a legend! What makes you think we can't save Equestria together?!" I blocked another swing of his sword with Ihsoylr, but he quickly turned and cut me across the leg, forcing me to collapse.

"That is a good enough of an example. You cannot defeat me, you cannot defeat whatever threatens Equestria now." He kicked me onto my back, then raised his sword to stab it into my chest. "Farewell, human."

That was when I learned the eighth thing that day...

Author's Notes:

Eeeyup, cliffhanger 'cause I'm a jerk. What was the eighth thing Rylan learned? How will he survive a sword to the chest? What will happen now? Find out next time...whenever I get around to writing the next chapter. Heh...I suck.

Next Chapter Preview:

"What is this?"

"I think it's the human, Alpha."

"Woof woof. I'm a dog."

"Lord Dyntos considers this thing a threat? He must be getting weak."