Author's Notes:

Sorry for the delay lads, I had some family business to take care of and work is back on full now but I'll try to keep it up as much as I can.

I pulled down the sleeve on my left arm further as I walked down the stairs and headed toward the kitchen. The bandages were as itchy as ever but I knew I'd make it worse if I scratched them anymore than necessary. A week had passed and most of the pain had gone away, gotta thank Fluttershy the next time I see her for giving me the salve and refusing to take any payment.

Naturally, word had spread of what had happened and what I did to Rainbow to retaliate. Once it came to Rarity she actually came over to check up on me. Seeing what was left of my shirt had made her dead set on making a completely new wardrobe for me, claiming that it would help her boutique by making clothes for the only human around. Not that I minded that much, of course.

“So since you said you wanted a job or something like that, what kind of job did you have in mind?” Twilight asked as I walked past her to the fridge.

Opening it and crouching down to see what was inside, I considered her question for a few seconds. “I dunno, really...” I reached for two sodas, stood up and closed the door with my left heel. “Back in my world I did some work with product development.” I cracked the can open and took a slow sip. “My left arm is still kinda out of it so I can't really do much physical work yet.”

“Well...” Twilight tapped a hoof to her chin. “Since you did development, why don't you take some human application and remodel it to equestrian use?” I handed her the second soda and she levitated it over to her, opened it and took a sip of her own.

I sat down opposite from her and scratched my chin. “You know, that's actually a really good idea... I can make a company that makes that sort of thing... Problem is, human products are usually made for... human use.” I flexed my left hand. “A lot of things rely on dexterity in controls that ponies that aren't unicorns can't use since magic can help you do a lot of fiddly things. Gotta have multiple uses and easy to use...”

Twilight's ears fell but perked almost instantly. “Well, I'm sure we can make it work somehow!”

I smiled at her enthusiasm and lightly shook my head. “So... Human things... For ponies...” I drummed my right fingers on the table. I stopped and looked down at my hand. I made a claw grip and started scratching my fingertips against the tabletop, making a sound. Twilight stared at my hand, then at me. I felt a grin come over my face and I bolted up to my feet.

“I got it!”

I ran out from the kitchen, up the stairs into my office to grab a pen and some paper then returned to where I had left Twilight in the kitchen. She tilted her head to me as I started drawing a rough sketch of what I had in mind. Once finished, I turned the paper to her with a grin.

She hummed. “I haven't seen anything like that before... What is it, exactly?”

“It's really simple, it's a backscratcher!” I pointed to the rod connecting the handle. “This is telescopic so you can make it longer for more reach.”

“I'll admit that it's an interesting idea but where will you find someone to make a prototype and then go through to production?”

“Let's just say I have a contact who knows his way around business in Canterlot...” He smirked.

“Oh? Who is it? Is it anyone I know?” Twilight barraged me with questions. I shrugged

“Eh, I dunno. He's at the castle and is one of the higher-ups there.” I took the drawing and eyed it for a couple of seconds. “I have to clean this up a bit though before I send it off to him though...”

“Well, if you need it sent off to the castle I'm sure Spike is eager to help. He's off with some of his friends right now but he'll be back later.” I nodded.

Sure, going back to Canterlot was pretty low on my to-do list but if I had understood Blueblood right, he was the head of a family corporation on the side of being a prince. I took another sip of my drink and swirled it in my mouth before setting it down on the table and swallowing.

Then again, I could remember it wrong on account of me being shitfaced back then...

“I can meet up with Spike after I've written another letter. Gotta head into town to pick up some groceries anyway...” A thought nagged at the back of my head.

'Dude, just ask her the question.'

What if it's stupid?

'As if that's anything new, we need to know this.'

“So...” I cleared my throat. Twilight's ears perked. “I was just wondering, if I'm the only human in Equestria how did you know how to do CPR on me?”

Her ears flattened and a small blush appeared on her face. “Well, I thought about minotaur and diamond dog anatomy since theyre both bipedal and winged some of it...”

“So you mean...”

“I kind of panicked, guessed where your heart was and started compressing where I thought it was...”

Huh. That explains some of the bruises I had on my chest. Another question came up. “Twilight, do you think I'm a bad person?”

Her eyes widened. “Well, I wouldn't say it like that.” She rubbed a foreleg. “Sure, you got your ways of doing things that are usually rather... Brutal.” She bit her lip and looked down at the floor. “I understand that you're still adjusting to being here and that some things are different in your world but,” She looked up into my eyes. “you have to calm down. You can't do everything and answering violence with violence will get you thrown in jail or worse eventually...”

I looked down on my left hand and started rubbing the scarring with my right hand slowly. I sighed. “I can't let everything go just like that, y'know...” I heard her sigh and about to say something. Before she could speak, I cut her off. “But if it can make things easier, I'll try.”

She gave me a deadpan stare “Do you mean it this time?”

I gave her a smirk and stuck my tongue out at her before responding. “That's a secret!” I heard a chime from the security system and raised my eyebrow. I stood up from my chair and walked over to the front door and opened a small cupboard.

Inside it was what looked like a really early fifties TV. Except for antennas, it had a small glowing blue crystal that had wires covering it. I turned it on and got static. “God fuckin' dammit.” I growled and smacked the side of it and the screen cleared up, sort of. I frowned as I scanned the screen.

Strawberry.

Again.

“What is it, Jay?” Twilight came over and looked at the screen as I unlocked the door and stepped outside. “Isn't that the mare who works at town hall..?”

“Yup.” I said as I scanned the ground. Satisfied by finding a small rock, I weighted it in my hand. “Her name's Strawberry. From Manehattan, moved here couple of weeks before I showed up, apparently.” I Stuck my left pointer finger in my mouth then raised it, feeling the wind. “She's been following me around though I've told her to fuck off like twenty times last week alone...”

I closed my left eye and balled my right hand into a fist, only holding up my thumb and lined it with my eye. “She comes over all the time after work, stalks me wherever I go and once tried to squeeze through the bars. Her fat ass got stuck...” I giggled at the memory. “So I've gone to the traditional way of dealing with things.” I took a running start, wound my right arm back and threw the rock as hard as I could.

It was dead silent as I saw the rock fly off. Twilight was staring at me with her eyes wide open. Like an excited kid, I skipped back to the screen as fast as I could. I caught the moment the rock knicked her in the head.

“Ow!”

She walked off, rubbing her head. Still smiling, I turned off the screen and closed the cupboard.

“I'm thinking of installing a tactical slingshot just for this reason.” I nodded with my arms folded.

“What happened to being nice?” Twilight glared at me.

“Weeell, Twilight” I crouched down and laid my right arm over her neck. “Change happens slowly, can't rush things. Baby steps.” Shit. Eating. Grin.

Twilight wiggled loose from me and huffed. I stood back up and tussled her mane. “Alright, I'm gonna go into town and get some food in the house.”

I fished my keys from my pocket and locked the door, walking toward the gate. Twilight sighed and then followed me.

“What do you mean there's no meat?!” I yelled at the pony behind the stand. “I haven't had a good steak in weeks, man!”

“I-I'm sorry sir but we usually don't sell meat. All we have is a small selection of fish and that's reserved for a few restaurants in Canterlot...” He shrunk back from my manic glare. I gritted my teeth.

“Are there places to buy meat in Canterlot?” I snapped my fingers in front of him to focus back to my question. “Answer me...”

“Uh... There's a place on the east cliffside that offers meat that I know of... It's mostly for griffin patrons. Ponies don't really go there...”

Good. Goal set. Looks like I'm going back to Canterlot faster than what I thought. I rushed getting the rest of my groceries and walked it back to my house. Grabbing a few more bits, I stomped to the train station. Ponies took one look at me and got out of my way.

I'm gonna get my motherfucking steak.