Fallout Equestria: Redemption
Author: Cooperdawg
Chapter Eleven: Shattered Illusions
“We all start with innocence, but the world leads us to guilt.”

I don’t know how long I stood there, staring down at that small, dusty pile of old bones, just trying to hold myself together. Something was breaking inside me, and had been for a long time. It wasn’t the world we lived in. I had grown used to the wasteland shortly after getting kicked out of Grovedale, and had seen more than enough horrors to become hardened to it. It wasn’t even the severity of life or the cost of survival. It came down to ponies’ blatant disregard for death. They no longer cared if anypony lived or died, and treated the dead as just another inanimate object. I was no different.

And here, a family that had managed to stay together right up until the very end, and had remained together for two hundred years past that, had been brutally cast aside, as if their lives or love didn’t matter. How had we allowed ourselves to reach this point? Life should matter, and we simply no longer acted like it did. Suture had been the first pony I had met in years that had cared if others lived or died, was actually willing to fight me to keep others alive, and the first thing I had done was yell at her that they deserved to die. And now… now I was twisting her to that way of thinking. Already, she was beginning to value some lives less than others. How long would it be until she cared as little about killing raiders and slavers as the rest of us did?

“Evergreen? Are you all right?” Crosswire asked me, a very clear note of concern in his voice, “You’ve been standing there silently for five minutes.”

“No… I’m not all right, Crosswire. Something is seriously fucked up with this world. How could they just toss them aside like that?” I answered, almost choking up when I tried to talk.

“Because they were the type of ponies that simply didn’t give a fuck about others. Just look at her. Normal ponies don’t do that kind of shit,” the ragged grey buck answered, gesturing at the corpse of the mare on the bed. “But seriously, Evergreen, is there anything I can help with?”

“No, I don’t think anyone can help me, honestly,” I answered quietly, thinking back on Yaari’s words. The young zebra mare had been right about me, almost. At least I still gave a shit whether or not some ponies lived or died. I may be a pony that was good at nothing other than wanton slaughter, and whose actions were only thought out to benefit me, but at least I still cared about the lives of others. “I need to talk to Suture about something. Just… try to get some rest, I guess. We’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”

With that, I turned and left the bedroom, leaving the grey buck baffled, his mouth hanging open with a comment that I didn’t give him the time to voice. I made my way down the hall and into the room that the medic was sharing with Autumn Mist. They were both still awake, since it seemed that Autumn was having a hard time getting comfortable on the bed because of her injury.

I stood quietly in the doorway for several minutes, letting the medic do her work before intruding on her concentration. It took a while, but they finally managed to get the dark mare settle down, and I wandered in. “So, how’s she doing, Suture? Honestly now,” I asked, stepping up to the bed and looking down at the young sniper with my best attempt at a concerned expression.

“Honestly, she will recover, but the shot did some serious internal damage. At least I managed to fix the worst of it. She’ll be fine in a day or two. That slaver was one hell of a good shot. Good thing you took her down when you did,” Suture answered with barely a sideways glance at me. She was still entirely focused on Autumn, carefully probing the bandaging around her wound to make sure it was holding.

The comment made me wince. A few short weeks ago, and the maroon pony would have been at my throat simply at the idea that I was going to kill someone else.

“I’m still not sure how I missed the bitch,” the sniper muttered darkly, “It wasn’t even that hard of a shot.”

“It happens. At least it turned out the best for us,” I answered. It probably wasn’t the right thing to say, but it was all that my pre-occupied mind could come up with.

“Yeah, I guess. Well, as Suture keeps insisting, I should get some sleep,” Autumn Mist said with a pained yawn, wincing as the movement pulled at the bandages, “So if you got something to say to her, please step outside. I’m a light sleeper, and these holes in my side aren’t helping matters.”

I nodded my acknowledgement at her and turned to look at Suture. “Do you have a moment?” I asked, trying my best to keep a begging tone from keeping into the words.

“Yeah, I guess. It can’t wait until morning?” she asked, looking away from the sniper lying prone on the bed for the first time since they had joined us outside.

“I would rather it didn’t,” I answered, stepping towards the door and holding it open for the medic. She hesitated for a moment before following me, stepping out into the hallway.

Steel Curtain was lying down by the stairs to the main floor, far enough away that he shouldn’t hear us if we spoke quietly. I still wasn’t sure how much I wanted the others to know, or how much I thought they could now without undermining their belief in me, but Suture was the only one I could think of who could possible help me with the problem I was facing right now.

“So, what’s so urgent that you needed to talk to me now, Evergreen? We’re all tired after that fight, and we could all use some rest, you especially,” the medic asked, cocking her head at me quizzically.

“Tell me that I’m doing the right thing, Suture. Tell me that all of this is worth it,” I blurted out, sitting down heavily on my rump as my rear legs gave out, “Tell me that there’s a reason for the lives lost.”

“Evergreen? Where is this coming from?” Suture asked, sitting down next to me, her expression a study in concern, “As far as ethics and moral are concerned, you’ve been one of the most stable of all of us.”

“How can you say that? You are the only pony I know that gives two shits about who lives or dies out here! Sure, I want to help where I can, but… if I’m too late to help somepony, I don’t feel especially bad about it, at least so long as I know there was nothing I could do. To me, they’re just dead, another victim of the wasteland. How the fuck is that ethical? Shouldn’t I care more about them?” I demanded, struggling to keep the volume of my voice under control.

The maroon mare remained silent, her head hung low so she was looking at her forehooves, with a conflicted expression. “I don’t know what you want to hear, Evergreen. You’re the one that taught me that the wasteland is a harsh place, and that some ponies have to die if we want to save those that are worth saving. I still want everypony to have a chance to live, but I’m not as stupid as I once was. Lives are important, but living even more so.”

“But that’s the problem,” I muttered as a tear fell from my eye to trace a path down my cheek, “I don’t want to live, not like everypony else does. All I want anymore is to know that my life is still worth something to somepony. I don’t want to be hated or feared, but I can’t settle down in some town and just live out my days without doing anything, but any other course will just end up with me dead in a ditch somewhere.”

“What’s really the issue here, Evergreen? You’ve never had this kind of problem before. If anything, I think you’ve been too callous about other’s lives. And now you’re asking me where everything went wrong? What’s going on?” the medic asked, fixing me in a worried stare.

“I… I just don’t know what I’m doing anymore…” I said, not finding the strength to lift my head to return her stare, “I feel like I’m corrupting you from the pony you once were. I just… I don’t know if I can do it anymore… all the death.”

“Evergreen, I’ve adjusted because I’ve had to. As you all have shown me, the wasteland is not a nice place, and I need to learn how to defend myself if I want to survive out here. Thankfully, I haven’t had to kill anything more intelligent than a feral ghoul yet, but that isn’t corruption. And death: Evergreen, the wasteland is full of nothing but death. No matter where we go we are going to be faced with it. Hell, we’re fighting against a pony that thinks it’s okay to burn an entire town to the ground. I have no problems with letting a pony die that willingly slaughters so many. After all, I was quite willing to attack you that day your gang rebelled against you, wasn’t I?”

“So you agree with what we’re doing?” I asked hopefully, lifting my chin by a few degrees so I could at least look at her face.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, Evergreen. This needs to be done, and so far, you’ve been the only pony willing to stand up and do it,” she answered with a smile, “So stop worrying. We’ll win, we have to. Already, towns are flourishing because of our influence. For the first time ever, Metro has a trade agreement with another town, and you’ve managed to solve a problem that has been plaguing Millberry for a long time, even if that solution hasn’t been implemented yet.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m still not happy, but at least I can rest knowing that I’m not making the wrong decision about Seahawk. It’s just so hard to see what the right choice is sometimes,” I muttered, forcing myself to my hooves, “Thanks, Suture. I feel better. See you in the morning.”

“Make sure you actually sleep, Evergreen. You’ve looked exhausted all day. And remember, we’re here for you. A lot of what we’ve faced would make anypony feel unsure. Good night.”

Despite what I had said, sleep wasn’t going to come easy. Crosswire was already snoring by the time I wandered into the room. My eyes were automatically drawn to the pile of bones, and my hooves brought me to them. I sat down, sadness gripping my heart and soul, and gazed into the empty voids that were the eye sockets of the child’s skull.

“I’m sorry,” I muttered after a few moments of silence, my head dropping to stare at the ground between my hooves and a few tears sliding down my cheeks to drip onto the stained carpet of the room, “I’m sorry we couldn’t be here to stop this.” I shifted my head to look over at the corpse of the mare that was still lying on the bed. Rather than move it out, Crosswire had simply lain down against the wall on the floor. He was probably expecting that we wouldn’t be coming back here in a while, and after all, to him, as with so many others in the wasteland, it was just another dead pony.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t save you,” I said to the body, “Maybe in the end, we can stop this happening to others… somehow…”

I forced myself back to my hooves and made my way over to Crosswire, where I lay down beside him and tried to get some rest, but as I had predicted, sleep wasn’t going to come easy.

Every time I closed my eyes, visions of ponies I had failed flitted before me. I saw my parents, bleeding out onto the ground in front of Grovedale; then Heart Attack came forward, walking to his death which I had done nothing to stop; Hat Trick, lying broken and bleeding on the roadside, and the bodies of his entire caravan lying in the farmhouse, carved up by a raider’s knife. I saw the pile of bodies at Buckview, sending a column of smoke into the sky as they burned, and also the bodies of every single innocent pony that had been killed as a result of my choices while with the raider gang. Everywhere I went there was death and misery, and I had done little, if anything, to stop any of it. All I did was react to the situations, fighting to save a life or two, but nothing I had done was going to be a permanent solution. Not yet.

I was going to stop Seahawk, and give the towns a reason to fight together, and to start striking back against the wasteland. I would do that, or I would die trying. It was all that was worth it anymore. And then, maybe, I could forgive myself.

The gradual lightening of the room woke me some hours later. My sleep had been restless and full of nightmares, but at least I had managed to get some. The way the night had begun, I thought it was going to be another sleepless night.

I rose to my hooves and made my way out into the hallway. The first thing I noticed was that Steel Curtain was nowhere to be seen. A little worried, I walked down the stairs and picked my way between the ponies we had managed to save. Some of them were starting to stir, and the ones that were already awake quickly moved out of my way, giving me a clear path to the door. A few of them might have muttered something about me saving their lives, but I wasn’t listening. All I cared about was finding Steel Curtain.

Outside, the rain was coming down in a steady downpour, quickly soaking me through my barding and forcing my mane flat against my head as I stepped outside in search of the armored Pegasus. I finally found him sitting out on the road, staring up into the sky with a depressed expression.

“Missing home?” I asked, coming up beside him and sitting down, far enough away from his side that I hoped he wouldn’t think it meant anything.

“No. I don’t miss Stormfront. Don’t think I ever could. It’s my family, not knowing if they’re all right or are being held because I’m a traitor. Dad would be able to cope, he’s strong like that, but Mom… she isn’t as strong as he is. She was born and raised in a small town, far enough removed from the big-city politics that she’s never had to worry about it. And my brother… fuck, he’s probably been kicked out of the military and made an outcast,” he answered glumly, then, his face hardened and an angry frown overtook his glum expression, “And there isn’t a fucking thing I can DO about it!” He finished with a shout, getting to his hooves and starting to pace.

“We’re working on it, Steel Curtain. Once we get this shit with Seahawk taken care of, the Enclave is next on the list. Your family will be fine, I promise,” I said, trying to calm the agitated Pegasus.

He rounded on me, his anger etched into every line of his expression, and his body almost shaking with all his pent-up emotion. “Can you guarantee that, Evergreen?” he demanded, “Can you tell me right now that my family is ok?”

I was taken aback by his anger. I had never before seen him this wound up. “No, I can’t. But I’m going to do everything I can to make sure that they will be, one way or another. I can’t promise that they are fine now, but I can promise that I will do everything in my power to help.”

Steel Curtain simply stood stock-still, watching me, then snorted and turned to face back up to the sky. “I guess that has to be enough. But what are you going to do, Evergreen? You barely know what to do about Seahawk. What’s the next step with him, huh? Or are we just going to be doing Mallet’s bidding for the next few months, rather than going for the source of the problem?”

His question caught me flat-footed, and I didn’t know what to say. “Well, I haven’t heard anything beyond what you know. He simply has done too well keeping his plan quiet. The only lead I can even think of right now is that Pegasus friend of yours. What was his name again?” I asked, trying to defend myself.

“Starshine. And if that’s what you think, then we should find him,” Steel Curtain said, looking at me with a determined glare.

“I’d love to, but we haven’t got a clue where he is! I remember him telling us that he would get in touch with us once he has that town set up,” I retorted, “So until we know where to find him, we should keep getting the towns in the area prepared for war, because that is what this is going to become before it all ends.” I didn’t want to tell the Pegasus that I didn’t know if I could keep fighting like I had been. Not with all the death it was causing.

“I suppose you have a point. Is this side trip into Seaddle really necessary then?” Steel Curtain asked, looking at me critically.

“It could be. Sure, I want to get that bastard Shooting Star to stop calling me something I don’t deserve, but look at it this way. In order to tell everypony the news as well as he does, he has to have a pretty reliable source of information, which means there could be things he’s holding back because it will make him a target. If we can meet with him face-to-face, we might be able to learn something about Seahawk or the Enclave, or just the wasteland in general that will help us,” I explained.

“Makes sense,” Steel Curtain muttered, “At least you sound like you know what you’re doing.”

“I have an idea, Steel Curtain, I can’t do anything more than that. Not until I have more information,” I said, rising to my hooves, “Now come on, let’s go inside and get something to eat. We have a long day ahead of us.”

“Isn’t every day a long day?” he asked morosely as he too got up.

“Yeah, what’s your point?” I asked with a smirk and a flip of my mane as I turned towards the house.

“Nothing, I guess,” he answered. His tone had lightened up a bit, a fact of which I was very grateful. I needed him to be focused.

By the time we were back inside, almost every pony was up. Crosswire already had most of the remainder of our food spread out, and was sharing it with the ponies we had managed to save.

“Hey, Evergreen. I figured we could share since we should be back in Metro this afternoon anyway, and we’ll be able to re-stock,” he explained once he saw me enter.

“Good idea. How is everypony? Is Autumn up and moving?” I asked, walking up to him and picking a couple of packages of pre-war food out of the pile which I promptly opened and started eating.

“Yeah, she’s stiff, but she’s up. Suture can really work wonders,” the grey buck answered with a grin, “I would know.”

“Yeah, I suppose you would,” I answered between mouthfuls, “Think we’ll be able to get on the road soon? Weather is shit, and I’d rather not spend more time than we have to out there.”

“Yeah, it shouldn’t be too long before we get moving. We just getting to Metro today, or did you want to start towards the city as well?” the tech asked.

“If we get to Metro early enough, I would like to try to get a move on towards Seaddle, but if it looks like we’ll be caught in the open by the time night rolls around, we’ll probably just stay in Metro. I’d rather not risk doing something stupid.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Crosswire said as he started packing up the last remains of our food, which was a much smaller pile than what we had started with.

We set out not much later, all fifteen of us. Most of the ponies we had rescued weren’t from Metro, but they agreed that it would be much better to at least get back to civilization before trying to make their way back to their respective homes, if those homes were even still standing.

The rain was oppressive, soaking all of us completely through and making the journey miserable, but that meant it was making everypony else in the wastes miserable as well, so we were hopeful that we wouldn’t run into trouble. Unfortunately, the weather intensified as we traveled, soon evolving into a full thunderstorm, lightning and thunder included. With every flash of lightning, we were flinching, thinking that it was the start of an attack on us, but the wasteland remained empty.

The weather also slowed us somewhat, as the downpour turned the beaten up road into a stream of mud, with only occasional solid patches where the old asphalt roadway was still intact. Goddesses, it sucked that Equestria’s industrialization came so close to the end of the war. Had it been sooner, most of these paths would probably have been built to last, and we wouldn’t be having a problem with mud.

All the same, we trudged onwards, lowering our heads into the biting wind, and just setting one hoof down in front of the other. Complaining would get us nowhere, and everypony knew it. All we had was the next step, and eventually we would make our destination.

We arrived much later than I had hoped, the shanty town appearing before us like some large beast, materializing through the rain as we stumbled within its bounds. I was surprised at how many ponies were still going from stall to stall, buying and selling.

Even more surprising was the quality of the clientele. The last time we had left, I had noticed that they all seemed to be just this side of being raiders, all of them hardened wastelanders with unkind eyes, never more than a twitch from drawing a weapon. Now, there was a decent smattering of normal ponies in the mix. Most were still just this side of raiding, but there was a difference. Maybe helping to secure the roads between Millberry and Metro was making it possible for those ponies living on the frontier to come in and trade for things they needed.

I could only hope.

We left our following at the gates to Metro, as most of them weren’t known by the guards, and so would not be risked until they could be checked out, but my group was let through on sight. It was bliss to finally get out of the rain, though I felt like I wouldn’t be dry for the rest of eternity.

Our first stop was Suture’s infirmary, where she checked both mine and Autumn’s wounds. It was the first time I saw exactly what kind of damage the young sniper had taken. Two small puncture wounds were placed almost exactly at her center of mass, and one of them was still sluggishly leaking blood. It had probably reopened during our walk. It was a bad injury, and would probably have killed her had Suture not been right there.

My own injury was much easier to heal. Now that we had full access to an infirmary, it took the skilled Earth Pony medic only a few minutes to clean out my wound, apply a salve and bind it up tightly with bandaged soaked in healing potion before I felt worlds better.

“So what’s the plan, Evergreen?” Crosswire asked once Suture was done with our injuries. He was seated against one wall, stripping and cleaning his SMG, but with both eyes fixed carefully on me.

I hesitated for a moment, convincing myself that I already had a plan, and that it was something that I needed to do. Even so, I still felt a whisper of the words the young zebra mare had told me, that everything I ever did was only to benefit myself. I didn’t want to use my friends like that.

“The weather is total shit, and I really don’t want to spend more time out there than I have to. On that note, Autumn Mist and I could both really benefit from a good night’s rest here, where we don’t have to worry about getting attacked in the middle of the night,” I answered, somewhat shakily, returning the tech’s gaze.

“Makes sense to me. We should probably go out into the market and restock our supplies then. We’ve been using a lot of ammunition, and most of our food is spent. Is there anything else we need?” he asked, swiftly reassembling his weapon and sliding a fresh clip into it.

“Maybe some parts to repair our barding?” Autumn Mist suggested from the bed where she was lying. She still looked pale, but her voice was regaining at lot of its strength, “Especially considering the amount of fire we’ve been taking. I don’t think basic leather barding is really going to cut it anymore. If we can, we should all invest in some armor like Evergreen’s.”

“That makes a lot of sense, though it is going to be expensive,” Suture said while she cleaned her hooves and mouth in the sink, washing away the bit of blood that had accumulated while she was treating us, “Do we have enough to take care of that?”

“Well, after the last payment we got for helping Millberry, not to mention the payment we’ll get for delivering that Crystal, we’re sitting on a pretty good fortune of caps. Might as well put it into circulation here. Besides, we only need reinforced barding for you, Crosswire, and Autumn. Shouldn’t be too expensive,” I answered. This was a subject I had no problems with. Nothing could be a better investment than improving our armor.

“That’s agreed then. Want to go take care of that now, Evergreen?” Crosswire asked, giving me a penetrating glare. I could see what was on his mind, and it was making me distinctly uncomfortable. I could tell he had finally worked himself up to talking about his feelings, and that was not something I was looking forward to discussing. But I also couldn’t put it off any longer.

“Yeah, sure. We should probably stop by Mallet’s office first, though,” I answered, pulling out a pouch full of caps, which I tossed at Steel Curtain, “Steel Curtain, would you mind taking care of food and ammo while Crosswire and I get the caps for the barding?”

The armored Pegasus caught the pouch in his mouth and placed them into a compartment on his armor before nodding curtly. “Yeah, no problem. Didn’t you promise that one weapon dealer you’d go there first?”

“Yeah, so make that appearance and let her know what we need. We should get a good price,” I said while I made sure my saddlebags were settled comfortably over my barding.

“Will do. I’ll meet up with you guys once I’m done with those supplies,” Steel Curtain said, then disappeared out the door.

Crosswire and I took another few seconds to make sure we had everything we needed, which mainly meant that we took Autumn’s and Suture’s barding, then made our own way out into the market.

We barely made it three steps out of the infirmary before Crosswire brought that subject up. “Evergreen, we need to talk,” he said. His tone was strained, but determined. It wasn’t hard to tell that he had taken a long time to work himself up to this.

“I know, Crosswire, and I think I know what you’re going to say,” I muttered. With everything else going on in my head, this wasn’t really something I wanted to worry about. My personal life shouldn’t be what I was worried about, yet it seemed like fate wasn’t going to allow anything else.

“You do?” he answered, genuinely shocked. He was now staring at me intently, and I could see his feelings for me plastered on his face. He wasn’t even attempting to hide them, and it made me feel very uncomfortable. “You mean to tell me that you know exactly how I feel about you? That I’m in love you?”

There it was, laid out in the open for all to see. I sighed heavily, dropping my head in defeat. “Yeah. I wouldn’t have if Steel Curtain hadn’t said anything. He told me that he noticed you looking at me and stuff like that. End result is pretty logical from there.”

“Steel Curtain told you?” he asked, his voice wavering somewhat, and his expression confused, “Why would he… I mean, how did he know? Wait, you answered that. Why?”

“Ugh… Crosswire, this entire situation is something I’m really not comfortable with. I haven’t thought about stallions in… well, ever, honestly. I’ve always been more concerned with surviving. Steel Curtain told me because he thought I should know, and I’ve been oblivious to that sort of thing for as long as I can remember.” That statement wasn’t entirely true anymore, as I had noticed Steel Curtain looking at me quite a bit himself recently, but that wouldn’t have been a good thing to tell the grey unicorn.

“Then… then you feel the same way?” he asked me, the clopping of his hooves on the concrete floor coming to a stop as he turned to look at me, forcing me to a stop as well. The hopeful look on his face was painful to see, especially knowing what I had to tell him.

This was it, the moment I had been dreading, and there was no way I was getting out of answering. “Crosswire, I…” I choked up, my throat closing on me and not letting me speak. Crosswire was looking at me with such hope, and such feeling, that saying no was proving to be a lot harder than I had anticipated, but it was still something I had to do. “I’m sorry. You’re my closest friend, my first friend. It isn’t what you want to hear, but… I just don’t see you that way. I would give my life for you in an instant, but, I just don’t think I can see you as a coltfriend.”

My words crushed him, as I knew they would, but I wasn’t going to torture the buck by making him think I shared a feeling that wasn’t there. His head dropped down, his ears flat against his head, and I saw the light of feeling disappear from his eyes as he locked his emotions back up inside himself again. “Oh… I see,” I trailed off, starting to walk again, although his steps were much more deliberate now.

“Crosswire, I know it hurts,” I called after him, trotting to catch up, “but you know me. I wouldn’t try to foster something that I didn’t feel. If I tried to pretend, it would just be worse. You know that. You’d know I was lying the second the words come out of my mouth.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” he muttered, his voice low and depressed, “Was it something I did or said? Maybe pushing you too hard when I thought you were being indecisive?”

I quickly shook my head. “No. Nothing like that. I just don’t have any romantic feelings towards you. Everything you’ve told me, you’ve been right. I did need to start trusting my instincts, and I was making stupid decisions when I pushed those ponies we saved aside. I’ve been listening to you, Crosswire,” I said, trying to keep my tone sympathetic.

“It’s Steel Curtain, isn’t it?” the grey unicorn asked suddenly, his head coming up and fixing me in an accusing glare, “You love him, don’t you?”

“What! I… what?” I sputtered, caught completely off guard by the question, “Where the hell is that coming from? Crosswire, I’m trying to be honest here. I don’t want there to be any bad feelings between us! Like I said, you are my closest friend, and I couldn’t imagine going back out there without you!”

“You say you didn’t notice me looking at you, or the way I feel, but I’ve seen you sneaking glances at him,” the tech pressed, his tone becoming sharper. He was being irrational, and I knew it, but that didn’t make the words hurt any less.

“I don’t know!” I exclaimed, bringing us to a stop so I could properly face him, “Yeah, I’ve been looking, but I just don’t know how I feel yet. I haven’t known him long enough!”

“And yet you find a chance to be alone with him all the time. Like this morning, in that storm. I noticed when you woke up and went outside, then the both of you came back together. Do you two feel so ashamed about it that you have to do things in secret, and make the rest of us suffer?” he snapped, his eyes now filled with anger.

There were very few things that Crosswire could have done to piss me off, but that was one of them. I reached out and smacked him across the face, hard. While he stood there, holding a hoof to his face, a shocked expression plastered on his features, I started shouting, not caring about the audience that was quickly forming around us, eager for a change in the monotony of their small city. “How fucking dare you! I went out looking for him because he wasn’t inside when I woke up and I was worried! He’s as much a part of our group as you are, as much a friend to me as any of you! He’s been worried sick about how his family is probably being treated up there, and all you can think about is if we are fucking?! Fuck, you don’t even know how awkward the conversation was when he told me about your feelings!”

I had to stop to catch my breath, and in that instant, I could see that my words were finally having an effect on the grey buck. The anger was disappearing from his expression to be replaced with shame. He had backed up, trying to get away from me, but ended up trapped by the circle of ponies that had formed around us. So instead, he sat down, his eyes looking down at the ground between his hooves, and his ears were laid flat against his head.

“I don’t want this kind of shit to come between us, Crosswire,” I said, softer now. Seeing him respond to my anger had dissipated most of it. I was still angry, and expected an apology, but I had made my point, and he had gotten it. “You’re my friend and you always will be. I’m willing to forgive that comment because you weren’t thinking when you said it, but seriously. I don’t make others suffer if I can avoid it.”

“I know that, Evergreen,” Crosswire finally answered after several moments of silence when the group around us started to dissipate, once it became clear that there wasn’t actually going to be a fight, “and I’m sorry. It just… hurts.”

I sighed and took a step towards him. “I know. I’m sorry there isn’t anything I can do to fix that. Maybe someday you’ll find a mare who will appreciate you far more than I apparently can,” I said, leaning in and giving him a small peck on the cheek. I could do that little bit for him, at least. “For what it’s worth, you’ll probably end up far happier than I could ever be.”

The grey buck was now blushing, his cheeks bright red as he tried to regain his composure. “Well, thanks for being honest, I guess. I’m sorry I made an ass of myself.”

“I already forgave you,” I answered with a smile, hoping this would be the end of the problem, “Are we all right, then?”

“Yeah, we’re good,” he answered, returning my smile weakly and getting back up to his hooves and starting to walk again.

He still hurt, that much was obvious, but at least we had made sure that he would heal. There wasn’t anything else I could do for him.

We were admitted into Mallet’s office almost immediately after arriving. It seemed that the blue Earth Pony had been on a break, but his secretary had assured as that he would see us. True to her statement, he jumped up excitedly from his seat as soon as we entered, and even poured us a drink for when we sat down.

“Evergreen, it is good to see you! I was starting to worry!” he exclaimed happily while he set the full glasses on the table. Crosswire’s was immediately surrounded by a yellow aura as he lifted it with his telekinesis and drained it. It didn’t take a genius to know why.

“We did run into a few troubles, but nothing we couldn’t handle,” I explained with a grin, gripping my own glass with a hoof and taking a sip. The alcohol had a good oaky flavor and burned a bit as it went down, warming me from the inside and doing some good to dispelling the chill from my bones that the rain had put there.

“I see. Well, I assume you delivered the Crystal?” Mallet asked, seating himself at his desk again.

“Yes, we did, though it turns out the mare it was meant to go to lives with the Steel Brotherhood in a bunker in the mountains,” I explained with a sardonic grin, “They weren’t too keen on letting us go, but I managed to convince them.”

“Well, I am certainly glad of that fact. Here is the price we agreed on then,” Mallet said, pulling out a bulging pouch, “I counted out the money a few days ago, though feel free to count it yourself.”

I grabbed the pouch and opened it. It was stuffed with nothing but caps, easily the three thousand we had agreed on. “Thank you Mallet. I think you would also like to know that we managed to wipe out the remnants of my old gang. The entire region is free of any organized groups now, except for the Brotherhood, but they’ve been keeping to themselves.”

“Really? Well, thank you for that. It will certainly make some trade in that area much safer. Now, I do have another job for you,” Mallet said, watching me with a joyful, yet at the same time business-like expression.

“I’m afraid I can’t really accept anything right now,” I answered, lifting a hoof to stop the mayor, “I’ve got a trip planned to go up to Seaddle and talk to Shooting Star. From there, I’m making a stop for the mare I delivered the Crystal to. Considering her age, we both deemed it safer for me and my friends to take care of. From there, we’ll see, but I don’t want to start accepting jobs when I can’t guarantee their timely completion.”

The buck’s expression changed to one of disappointment, but only briefly. He recovered quickly, smiling agreeably. “Of course. I understand completely that you need to do what you think is right. Keep in mind that if you ever need work, our doors are open to you. I’ve come to rely on your talents.”

“Thank you Mallet, I appreciate that,” I said, finishing my drink and getting to my hooves and heading towards the door. Right before I left, I thought of something I needed to mention. “Oh, if you have a caravan heading to Millberry, let their governor know that I secured his water purifier. The Steel Brotherhood agreed to part with one that I found in a Stable out that way. All they need to do is send the ponies to retrieve it.”

“Really?” the buck asked, genuinely surprised, “That is rather incredible. I imagine they will be quite pleased to hear that. I’ll make sure the next caravan has the message. Thank you once again for your help, Evergreen.”

I nodded my acknowledgment, then stepped out the door, making my way out into the market, Crosswire beside me. “Well, that went well,” I mused, rather pleased with the result of the meeting. I was three thousand caps richer, regardless of the fact that we were about to spend most of that money, and I had a plan for what we were going to do next that would, hopefully, avoid any needless death.

I couldn’t say what it was, but something about being in Metro made me simply feel better. Yaari’s words were still with me, and definitely still haunting me, but being in this town made all of that seem irrelevant. We had a plan to go out and save the wasteland, and I was confident we could pull it off with very little meaningless killing.

“Yeah, it did,” Crosswire answered, his speech slightly slurred.

I looked at him sharply. The drink had been strong, sure, but Crosswire hadn’t had that much of it. Then I noticed the empty bottle floating next to him, shaking violently in a very tenuous magical grip. He must have had a bottle of something in his saddlebags, and I hadn’t even noticed him grab it.

“Crosswire, why are you drinking? We still have work to do,” I asked, coming to a stop and reaching out a hoof to steady the buck, who I noticed was already becoming unsteady on his hooves. He must have pulled out the bottle while I was talking to Mallet.

“’Cause I needed a drink,” he growled, walking by me, a stormy expression on his face. I followed after him, since he seemed to be going in a completely different direction than the infirmary. Along the way, he stopped at a bar and bought another bottle of alcohol, which he promptly started drinking, despite my attempts to stop him. He was actually going out of his way to ignore me, and was using the crowd to keep me from getting to him to physically stop him. Before long, he was stumbling around, knocking into ponies who proceeded to shout at him.

I finally managed to catch up to him and lean him against me. He protested, but the drinks had done far too much for him to have any real control over himself anymore.

“Dammit, Crosswire, you really have some shitty timing. Couldn’t have waited until we had the barding getting upgraded, could you?” I growled, shifting the tech so he was leaning against me and making my way, slowly, to the infirmary. Suture would have to watch him while I got the barding taken care of.

It was slow going, and he fought me most of the way, claiming he wanted to go to the bar for more drinks, but I had the stability he was lacking and managed to keep him on track towards the infirmary. When we finally walked in, Steel Curtain was already back, and Suture was going about the room, checking her various cupboards and drawers, probably making sure all her supplies were where she expected them to be.

“Hey, Steel Curtain, help me with him,” I said as I entered, now struggling as the tech tried to get free and leave.

The Pegasus was immediately at my side, wrapping a wing around Crosswire’s body to keep him from wandering and steering him over to a bed, where the tech collapsed. “What the hell happened to him?” he asked with a confused glance in my direction. Already, Suture was at the tech’s side, looking him over.

“We talked, and I tried to let him down easily. He didn’t take it too well, and we shouted at each other for a minute or two, both saying some things we probably shouldn’t have, then apologized and went and met with Mallet. I thought he was all right, but then he pulled a bottle of something out of nowhere and drained it when I wasn’t looking,” I explained.

“Let him down easily? What does that mean?” Suture asked me, breaking her concentration over the buck for a brief moment to look at me.

I flushed, looking away awkwardly while I tried to decide how to answer. Thankfully, Steel Curtain covered for me. “Crosswire had his eye on Evergreen, but she doesn’t feel the same way. So she was letting him know that she wasn’t interested in a romantic relationship.”

“Yeah, that,” I stated lamely, walking over to the grey buck’s side. He was basically passed out at this point, partially because he was lying down, and partially because it looked like Suture had given him something. “You probably don’t need to worry too much. He was just really drunk. Really fast.”

“That’s what I’m concerned about. Most alcohol shouldn’t affect him like this. If he drank something especially concentrated that quickly, well, he could be in danger. I’m going to have to have him monitored tonight. At least you didn’t leave him wondering. Better he does this now than when we’re in the wasteland,” the medic said, pulling out a piece of equipment and taking some readings of his vitals.

“That’s what I thought. Wasn’t fair to him to let him think there could be something. I feel terrible about it but it just isn’t in me to make him think otherwise,” I said, looking down at Crosswire’s now still form.

“Sounds like the right choice to me. Let’s just hope he feels the same way when he finally comes ‘round,” Autumn said from where she was lying, a comic book in her hooves. It was easy to forget just how young the mare was.

“Yeah, I hope,” I agreed with a nod, then turned to Steel Curtain, “So, since these three are all otherwise occupied, can you help me get this barding situation organized? Crosswire didn’t bother waiting until we were done to get drunk.” I was already reaching into the tech’s saddlebags and pulling out Autumn’s and Suture’s barding. While I was doing that, Suture was undressing Crosswire and handed me his barding, which was intercepted by Steel Curtain.

“Of course,” he said with a quick nod, stowing the clothing in his armor.

It didn’t take us long to make our way down to the markets and find a pony willing to do the upgrades for us. The only point of contention was price. After a full ten minutes of haggling, we finally got the merchant to agree to upgrade all three sets of barding for only two thousand caps. It was still a lot more than I wanted to pay, but it was easily the best price we were going to get. Lucky for us, it guaranteed a night here, as the armorer would need at least that long to do the work.

Steel Curtain waited until our walk back to the infirmary to say anything to me about my conversation with Crosswire. The fact that he waited that long at all was a surprise to me. “So, I’m sorry you had to do that earlier,” he said awkwardly as we passed by a small kiosk selling what looked to be barbecued mole rat. Even after a life spent in the wasteland, I couldn’t understand why some ponies ate meat. It just didn’t look appetizing.

“It had to be done,” I answered simply. The memory of the conversation was still very fresh in my mind, and it wasn’t something I was really ready to talk about yet, “I’m not happy about the outcome, but at least it happened now.”

“I suppose you’re right,” the Pegasus answered, then looked at me with a concerned expression, “You think he’s going to be all right?”

I sighed heavily, since that was the question I had been trying to answer myself all day. I finally settled for what I felt at the moment. “Crosswire is stronger than he looks. He’s had tougher let-downs than this. He’ll be upset for a few days, but he’ll get over it. He always has.”

“That’s good to hear,” Steel Curtain said. His statement was met by a pregnant silence, then he asked something I wasn’t expecting at all from him. “Evergreen, are you all right?”

The question caught me completely off guard, and I needed several moments of spluttering to finally gather my thoughts. “What… yeah, I’m fine. Totally fine,” I said quickly, hoping it would be enough for the Dashite.

“Please don’t try that with me, Evergreen. Believe it or not, my hearing is pretty good, and I heard you talking to Suture last night. You can’t have a conversation like that one night, then be totally fine the next day. She might buy it, and Crosswire might buy it, but I don’t. I was in the military, and everypony there tries to hide things. I picked up how to tell when others are doing it,” he stated with an annoyed tone, “I’m asking because I care. If there’s a problem, you need to let us help you.”

I mulled over his words for a few moments, walking in silence and trying to decide what I thought about it. He had a fair point, but there was no way any of them, with the possible exception of Crosswire, could know what I was thinking. Even then, he was never the one that had to make the decisions. He didn’t know what it took to have the fact thrown in your face that every choice he ever made had never done anything but result in the deaths of innocent ponies.

Even worse, I knew now that I wouldn’t be able to hide from Steel Curtain. He’d seen through me once already. Trying to avoid it would only make matters worse. Which left one option: honesty.

“Steel Curtain, the problems I’m facing aren’t anything anypony else can help me with. If you want the truth, here it is. Those zebras we met said some things to me that bit deep. Not because they were insulting, or harsh, or anything like that, but because it was the truth. That mare, Yaari, does have a weird ability, like Autumn Mist suggested. She was able to tell exactly what I was with just a look, and pointed some things out I haven’t thought about before,” I said, slowing to a stop and looking sadly at the Pegasus.

“Let me get this straight. A zebra we’d just met said something to you that has since gotten into your head and made you doubt pretty much every decision you’re making?” he asked me, one eyebrow raised and his head cocked to the side.

“It isn’t just that!” I exclaimed, wanting to do nothing more than throw my hooves into the air in exasperation, “She knew me, Steel Curtain. She saw all the blood on my hooves, every bad decision I have ever made. She saw right through me, right to the fact that all I really want is for nopony to look at me as a reformed raider, but as just another pony, and I can’t do that, no matter what I try!” The more I spoke, the more desperate and upset my voice became. I had managed to repress my feelings on the matter, but that simple question from Steel Curtain had brought it all rushing back to the surface.

He was now looking at me in complete surprise, as though he hadn’t expected me to be this on edge. “Do you really think that’s how the rest of us see you?” he asked me, taking a step towards me and reaching out a hoof to place on my shoulder. When I didn’t shy away, he moved the hoof to my face and lifted my head so I was looking him in the eye. “Trust me, Evergreen, to us, you are far more than just a reformed raider. You’ve done amazing things these last few weeks. Saving that filly from Buckview and avenging all of those ponies, giving hope to an old mare that has lost everything, saving a whole bunch of slaves, not only once, but twice! And that is only what I’ve been around for. I’ve heard about your other work, like helping Millberry and saving an entire Stable’s worth of intelligent ghouls. Ponies don’t do that kind of thing anymore. They only care about themselves. Except for you.”

“But you guys are around me all the time. You see what I want. But everypony else, they still see me as what I was,” I trailed off, looking around at the dull grey walls of the Metro station, noticing for the first time the piles of rubble and garbage that were collected at the base of those same walls. It made me realize that, as much as it tried to be civilized, Metro was still just another wasteland refuge, filled with ponies that had nowhere else to go, or didn’t have the strength to venture out for something better, “Or as something I will never be.”

Finally, I had found an argument that one of my friends didn’t have an immediate argument for. Steel Curtain could do nothing but look at me sadly, his mind working madly behind those beautiful green eyes. “If you start thinking like that, then nothing we do will be worth it,” he finally said, “And that isn’t something I’m going to allow to happen. We’re here for you, and we are not going to abandon you.” Then he did something I was totally unprepared for. He darted in and planted a kiss square on my lips, holding it long enough that I started to respond to it despite my shock, then broke away. “Don’t forget that.”

Just as suddenly, he removed his hoof and started walking away, making for the infirmary. “Come on, we still have a lot of work to do if we want to get out of here early tomorrow. I hate being underground.”

The shock from his kiss held me firmly rooted to the spot as he walked away. I could still taste his lips on mine and, even worse, I longed for more. That singular action had awoken feelings in me that I didn’t think I had, and now that my eyes had been opened to them, I didn’t want to be left without.

But, the magic of that kiss considered, I didn’t know how I felt about it. My body was aching for more, but my mind was screaming at me to first figure my own shit out before I went screaming into a relationship I probably wasn’t prepared for. Hell, I was having problems that even Steel Curtain couldn’t give me an answer for, and he had an answer for everything! What did it say about me if I just forgot about those problems, and then tried to admit someone else’s feelings for me when I couldn’t even bring myself to like me?

I shook my head violently, breaking free of the spell the kiss had put me under and rose shakily to my hooves. I still wanted more, but at least I had the willpower to say no. Steel Curtain would hopefully understand.

In the infirmary, I stumbled onto a scene that held me rooted awkwardly to the spot, trying to reason out what I was seeing. Two older ponies, a male unicorn with a dark blue hide and cream colored mane and a pink Earth Pony mare with a greying red mane, were shouting at Suture. The medic was almost cowering against the wall, looking everywhere except at the two angry ponies. Steel Curtain was sitting on the opposite side of the room, going through all our new supplies and looking like he was trying his hardest not to watch the fight. Autumn Mist was lying flat on her bed, trying to make herself as small as possible, since its location placed her almost exactly in the middle of the fight. Her comic book lay forgotten on the ground in front of her, and she didn’t look like she was going to try to grab it anytime soon.

“What the hell do you mean, ‘You knew you were going to be fine’!” the buck was shouting, “You’ve been missing on a regular basis for the last two weeks! I don’t call that fine!”

“But… but just look at who I’ve been with! I’ve been fine! They are looking out for me and need me!” Suture protested, her voice on the verge of tears.

“I’m looking, and all I see are a bunch of wasteland barbarians, one of which is already passed out drunk!” the mare snorted condescendingly with a glare at Crosswire’s unconscious form.

“Not to mention that the others seem to be a mare that is far too young to be doing anything this dangerous, and now apparently also a Pegasus that probably thinks himself strong enough to do whatever he pleases with whomever he pleases!” the buck added harshly.

Now that comment got to me. “Hey, just who do you think you are, coming down here and yelling at her and throwing insults at a bunch of ponies you don’t even know? You’re judging us before you’ve even met us!” I snarled as I walked into the infirmary proper, watching in perverse amusement as the older ponies’ eyes practically popped out of their eyes in their shock that I had spoken to them like that. Suture was staring at me in horror, like she couldn’t believe I had done it either.

“I beg your pardon?” the buck sputtered angrily, “We are the only ponies with any right to speak with her! She is our daughter!”

Oh shit, was the only thought that strolled through my head at that.

“And as for you, Miss,” the mare said as her eyes roamed over my body, taking in every single flaw in a single glance, with a noted pause at the bandage around my leg and the blood stains on my armor, “I believe our assessment is perfectly valid, considering your appearance.”

“And that fact that I spent the last four fucking days on the road has nothing to do with the fact that I’m dirty?” I growled, my anger at these two ponies bias overriding any doubt that had come forward at their revelation that they were Suture’s parents.

“Only wastelanders see the need to travel, and our daughter is a doctor. She does not need to be out there, not when she has the security of our home,” the buck sneered at me, turning away to face Suture again, “Now, we were having a discussion with our daughter, not with you.”

“A discussion with Suture is a discussion with me!” I exclaimed, walking through the pair so that I was standing next to the terrorized medic, “She’s saved my ass far too many times for me to just abandon her.”

“Evergreen, you don’t need to do this,” Suture muttered quietly, stealing a scared glance at me before her parents interrupted.

“We will not tolerate any interruptions!” the mare announced, “Now leave us alone with our daughter!”

“I do need to, because you’re parents are just the sort of ignorant idiots that I can’t stand,” I told the medic before I locked my eyes on the older mare’s, putting every ounce of anger I could into the stare. “Now listen here. Your daughter is the only reason all of us are still on our hooves at all. Without her, we would have all died a long time ago. She is, quite literally, invaluable to us.”

“I don’t care…” the buck started, but I silenced him with a glare.

“Also, she is helping me fix a problem that is threatening the security of the entire wasteland, not just Metro. I need her, and so long as she is willing to help me, she is welcome,” I continued, making sure that my anger was making it into my words as well.

“I don’t care who you are,” the mare stated icily, walking up to me until her muzzle was mere inches from mine, “but I am not going to let you put my daughter’s life at risk. I can already see that she has come far closer to death than I would like. It’s in the way she holds herself, and the way she moves. And I can see the scars on her hide, scars she didn’t have the last time I saw her!”

“Mom, that isn’t fair!” Suture protested, pushing the older mare back and stepping between us, “I chose to go! My getting injured isn’t anypony’s fault! It’s just a risk of traveling.”

“A risk you don’t need to take, Suture! You have security here. You have a life, and a job. Why are you throwing that away to go into the wasteland?” her father asked, some of the anger fading from his voice as a note of desperation crept in. He was stepping forward until he was standing close to Suture.

“You’re right, I don’t need to take the risk, but I’ve chosen to,” Suture answered, looking her father in the eye, “Working here has never given me much satisfaction. Out there, I’m actually doing some good. I want to be there. Everypony here does their best to keep me out of harm’s way, but sometime that just isn’t possible.”

It seemed like traveling with us, and having me standing beside her, was giving the maroon mare some courage. Sure, my showing up had helped her, but I was fairly sure that she would have worked up the courage to speak up for herself eventually.

“But they don’t seem like the kind of ponies you should be consorting with, Suture,” the mare stated, looking from me, then to each one of my other friends, her gaze condescending the entire way, “I mean, look at them. All of them dirty and streaked with mud.”

“Sure, they’re rough around the edges, but I am convinced that there are no better ponies out there,” Suture stated, walking over to where Autumn Mist was lying, “Take Autumn Mist here. She’s young, but I’ve never met a pony as determined as she is to see right done in the wasteland. And since she’s the one I’m around the most, considering she’s our sniper, and I stay as far away from the fighting as possible, I know I’m right about that.”

The dark mare looked up at the medic and smile weakly. “I’m going to get you for this later, Suture,” she said darkly, but with undercurrents of humor in her voice.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less,” Suture answered with a smile as she turned back to her parents, “Steel Curtain is fighting with us because he believes in helping the wasteland. Our travels have brought us into contact with slavers and raiders, the worst that the wasteland has to offer, and he is dedicated to wiping them out and helping as many as he can.”

From his corner, the Pegasus looked up, the expression on his face showing that he hadn’t expected to be drawn into the discussion as well. “Ponies don’t deserve to be enslaved,” he added, “Enclave is too fucking close to that, and I couldn’t stand it up there either.”

“Fine, but what about them?” the buck asked, turning to look at me and Crosswire, “They look like a pair of raiders themselves, especially the unicorn.”

“I can speak for myself,” I announced, stepping forward. I didn’t want to face the thought that he had struck far closer to the truth than I was comfortable with. “I’m Evergreen, and somehow everypony here has more or less decided to do what I say. Our mission is my choice, through a combination of fate and wanting to make a difference. Without Suture, though, I can guarantee that I wouldn’t be here, or doing what I’m doing. I am only alive because she is still with me.”

The mare shot me a dirty look. She obviously hated me, and nothing I could say was going to change that. “So you claim. But what about him? He appears to be exactly like what he is: a drunkard.”

I narrowed my eyes at the mare, stepping between her and Crosswire. “He just so happens to be my closest and most loyal friend,” I snapped, “but he got some bad news today and decided to drink it off. Not exactly a choice I approve of. He’s our tech and repairpony. Can hack any door or open any lock in the wasteland. At least, I’ve yet to find one he couldn’t bust.”

“So he’s a criminal and a thief?” the mare pressed, somehow managing to put an even snootier look on her face.

“Have you ever been in the fucking wasteland?” I growled, “Do you know how many locked doors there are between us and a stash of supplies that could be the difference between life and death? Do you know the value of being able to hack into a turret control panel and turn off the defenses of a building, rather than have to worry about being shot in the back every time you turn down a hallway? Didn’t fucking think so.”

The venom in my voice must have struck a nerve because the mare backed off, a shocked look on her face. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize,” she muttered as she backpedaled, trying to gather herself.

“No, because you didn’t think. All you did was think about what our skills would get for us here in this town, rather than out there where the only form of civilization is survival of the fittest,” I snapped, “And I will not tolerate any more insults to my friends!”

“You see. I’m traveling with good ponies,” Suture said, stepping forward again and placing a hoof on her mom’s shoulder, “This is something I have to do. And I couldn’t abandon them after everything we’ve already been through. Besides, they’d fall apart without someone there to put them back together.”

“I suppose,” her father said hesitantly, stepping forward to embrace Suture, then he looked at me. “Can you guarantee that she’ll come home?” he asked, the intensity of his gaze pinning me in place.

I wanted nothing more than to say yes, but that would have been a lie. “No, I can’t,” I said, shaking my head slowly, “but I can guarantee that every single one of us will be doing everything in our power to keep her alive. The wasteland is a nasty place, but if you’re smart, you can survive. We’ve managed pretty well so far.”

The buck held me in his gaze for a few moments longer before he looked away, as though he was measuring the strength of my words. “I suppose that will have to do,” he muttered as he turned back to his family. “Promise me something, Suture. Promise me that you’ll be careful.”

“Of course, dad,” the medic answered with a sad grin, “I’m always careful.” She embraced her father closely, then turned to her mother.

“It’s obvious that I won’t be able to dissuade you, as much as I would like to,” she said, moving her gaze to me, “but I will say that if she dies, and I discover that you could have stopped it, I will kill you myself.”

“If I let something like that happen, you won’t need to,” I answered, my stare just as intense as hers.

The mare snorted at me, then looked back to Suture. “Be careful, my dear. I love you,” she said as she pulled the medic into an embrace.

“I love you too,” Suture answered as the two ponies stepped away, then disappeared out of the door. “Thank you for standing up for me,” she said a few moments later, once they were out of earshot.

“I couldn’t just stand there and let them insult me,” I answered simply, then looked at each of my friends in turn, “or any of them.”

“True, but still. I appreciate it,” the mare said with a sad grin as she walked over to the counter where she had been working and re-organized the supplies that had been sitting there.

“Anytime,” I answered, and made my way over to where Steel Curtain was sitting so I could help him with the supplies.

From there, we all worked in silence, doing what we could to prepare for our journey. Suture spent the time doing what she could to return Autumn Mist back to full strength, or as close as she could get, by morning while Steel Curtain and I divided up the supplies as evenly as we could. Before long, the day had made the transition to night, and we all retired to our own beds to rest.

I almost wished that Steel Curtain would have said something about the kiss, nearly as much as I dreaded it. I wished even more that he would give me another one.

For the first time in days, I slept well. I woke in the morning feeling remarkably refreshed, and ready for the journey north. I couldn’t say if it was the security of being in a guarded town, or just the atmosphere or Metro itself, and I certainly wasn’t going to complain, either.

I rolled off my bed to my hooves, shaking my head to chase away the last cobwebs of sleep, and looked around. Suture was already up and about, moving from place to place as she tidied up as she prepared to leave. Steel Curtain was also missing, no surprise there, and Autumn Mist was gone as well. Only Crosswire was still in bed, and I was fairly certain he was not going to be happy when he finally woke.

“Morning,” I grunted, stretching out my legs, almost moaning in pleasure as the stiffness simply melted away, “I’m guessing Steel Curtain went outside?”

“Oh, good morning, Evergreen. He did say he was going out there. Something about not liking being underground, I think,” Suture answered, turning to face me just long enough to answer before going back to her work.

“Figured as much. What about Autumn Mist? I didn’t expect her to be gone,” I asked, walking over to the medic to see what she was working on.

“She offered to go pick up our barding. Said she needed to stretch her legs after being cooped up for so long,” Suture answered absently, “Can you go after her, make sure she doesn’t get lost down here? I don’t think she’s ever been in Metro proper on her own.”

“Yeah, sure thing. Try to get Crosswire on his feet soon. I’d like to get out of here as soon as possible,” I answered, even as I walked out the door into the city, not even waiting for the medic’s response.

This early in the morning, Metro was still rather quiet. A few ponies were up and about, going from place to place as they attended to their business, but there were definitely far less than there had been during the day rush yesterday. I snaked my way through the various booths, stalls, and homes, making my way to the merchant that had promised to upgrade our barding.

Once I arrived, I found Autumn Mist already there, chatting with the merchant. The three sets of barding were sitting on the counter between them, and it looked like the sniper was talking about something to do with her barding, since she was holding a piece of it in a hoof in front of the merchant.

“Good to see you up and about, Autumn,” I announced as I approached, “Is there a problem with the upgrades?”

“Huh? Oh, hey Evergreen,” Autumn Mist answered, turning to look at me, “No, nothing wrong. Just asking about mobility. The heavier this stuff gets, the harder it is for me to move around, and I hate that.”

“Fair enough,” I said, turning my attention to the merchant, a green unicorn buck with a mane the color of rust. His cutie mark was a trio of Sparkle-Cola caps. “So, how does it look? Everything come together well?” I asked as I took one of the sets of barding and examined it. The plates were almost identical to my armor, so I knew how effective they were going to be in a fight. They also seemed to move easily, so Autumn’s questions about mobility were probably completely moot. Weight would be the only issue, since it was significantly heavier than standard barding.

“No problems. I do this kind of work quite a bit,” the merchant answered, watching me with a careful, calculating eye, “All I need is my payment, and they’re yours.”

“Autumn didn’t bring it?” I asked, surprised, looking at the dark mare.

“Nope. You’re the one with all the caps, Evergreen. Rest of us have our personal spending money, but you’re the one with the fortune. Didn’t think about that before I left,” Autumn Mist answered.

“Oh, sorry about that. Here you are, as agreed,” I said, reaching into my saddlebag and pulling out a pouch of caps that I had counted out the night before to pay for the armor. I tossed it at the merchant, who caught it deftly with his magic and stowed it away under the counter.

“Thank you for your business,” he said quickly, then turned away. No matter how civilized Metro was compared to the rest of the wasteland, the merchants were still only concerned about their money.

I shook my head at the merchant, stowed two of the sets of barding in my bags while Autumn Mist pulled hers on, then started on my way back to the infirmary. Autumn was just a step behind me.

“So you’re feeling better, I take it?” I asked as we walked, glancing at the dark mare’s side as we walked. It was still bandaged, but I wouldn’t have been able to tell that she was injured judged on the way she was moving.

“Much. I still don’t know how Suture does it, but I feel like I didn’t even get shot. I’m sure my side is still a mess, but hell, I feel great,” Autumn Mist confirmed, “And I have to say, it barely feels like I’m wearing this armor! That guy really knew what he was doing!”

“Yeah, it certainly is comfortable, as long as nopony is smashing it with an axe while you’re still wearing it,” I answered, looking back to the spot on my armor that was still clearly patched where just that had happened only a few days ago. It was odd to think had much had changed since then. The plates were still stained with blood, despite all the rain.

“Yeah, I can’t imagine that was much fun,” the sniper said with an evil grin and a sidelong glance at me.

“About as much fun as having a sniper rifle go off right next to my head,” I answered, returning her grin. To her credit, Autumn winced at that.

“At least it was better than the alternative. I was really strung out that day,” she said, lifting a hoof to smooth out her short mane.

“I think we all were,” I answered solemnly, “At least it turned out for the best.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Autumn said with a small laugh, “I can’t imagine what I’d be doing now if I had shot you. Would have probably wound up bound and rutted like that mare we saved. What was her name again? Sparkle or something?”

“Sparks,” I answered, the smile fading from my face. She was the mare we had rescued from raiders, the same ones that had maimed almost every single limb and smashed the horn of the caravan leader, Hat Trick. We had brought them back here, which made me think about trying to find them before we left. Unfortunately, we didn’t really have time. We simply had so far to go.

“That was it!” Autumn exclaimed happily, “I’m so bad with names. But yeah, I probably would have ended up like her, though nopony would have shown up to save me, I bet.”

“Then you’re welcome for not shooting me,” I said, forcing a smile back to my face and trying to put a bit of humor into my voice.

The dark mare laughed at that, but didn’t actually say anything. We finished our walk in silence, arriving at the infirmary to find that Crosswire was finally awake, and that he looked like hell.

He had dark circles under his eyes, and from his expression I could tell that he had one hell of a headache. Served him right for being that stupid yesterday. Now he got to live with it.

“Finally up I see, Crosswire,” I said jovially, walking up to him and reaching into my barding for his newly upgraded barding, “Here you go.”

“Fuggoff,” he muttered darkly, his magic gripping the armor all the same and pulling it towards himself, “Feel like my head got closed in a door… repeatedly.”

“Well, that’s what you get for drinking like that the day before we need to travel,” Suture admonished him, her voice holding not a single shred of sympathy.

“Fuck… Stop me if I ever try that again,” he muttered darkly, barely managing to pull the armor on before he rushed to the sink and vomited.

“As fast as you drank that shit, I didn’t have a chance to stop you,” I told him, laughing at his expense, “Otherwise I would have!”

All I got in response was an undignified snort, followed by another bout of vomiting.

“At least he’s getting it out of his system,” Suture commented, watching him with an amused expression, “He’ll feel better once he’s done.”

True to the medic’s prediction, Crosswire seemed much more himself when he finally pushed himself away from the sink ten minutes later, even though he still looked like shit. Suture gave him a minute to clean himself up, then we were out the door, making our way out of the infirmary and back up to the surface. Our journey to downtown was finally beginning.

It was a good day for travel. For once, it wasn’t raining, although the clouds were threatening, as they always did. For the first time in days, I felt confident about the day, like it was going to end well.

We found Steel Curtain on the outskirts of the shantytown in the middle of a hoof-wrestle with a burly-looking Earth Pony buck. As we approached, I saw the Pegasus’s eyes dart over to us, lock onto my face, then dart back to his opponent. His body tensed up more, and I saw him strain even harder against the dirty brown Earth Pony. With a triumphant shout, the Dashite threw the last of his strength into the competition and slammed his opponents hoof down against the table they were wrestling on.

“Yeah! That’s a hundred caps!” Steel Curtain exclaimed, launching himself in the air where he did a victory lap around the small area where we were standing. It was an impressive display of emotion from the usually stoic Pegasus.

“You wrestled him with the power armor on?” I asked the Earth Pony incredulously, “What convinced you to do that?”

“He didn’t look so tough. I should’ve been able to take him,” the buck brooded, nursing his hoof. He was watching Steel Curtain with a sullen look, but it wasn’t the kind that made the back of my neck itch.

“A lot of ponies underestimate me. It’s how I’m still alive,” Steel Curtain stated as he landed at the table again, “Good fight, though. You had me worried for a moment.” He reached out a hoof towards the other buck.

“Yeah, I guess it was a good competition,” the buck answered with a grin, reaching out and giving the Dashite a hoof bump, “And I guess a bet is a bet.” He reached into his saddlebags, drew out a pouch and counted out a pile of caps, which he then tossed at the Pegasus.

“Thank you,” Steel Curtain said with an elaborate bow as he pocketed the caps, then turned to us. “Good timing, everypony. When we started that wrestle, I thought there was a chance you guys wouldn’t believe me.”

“You’re in powered armor. I can’t believe it was even a competition,” Crosswire stated dryly with a sidelong glance at me. That one look told me everything. He was convinced that the Pegasus had merely been waiting for me to show up, as a way to show off.

“Was the bet really worth it, Steel Curtain?” I admonished him, “After paying for those upgrades, we’re awfully low on caps, and without a sure means of income for the next little bit, we need to save what we can. Seems like an awful risk just to prove your strength in a hoof-wrestle.” Damn, it sucked having to keep the peace. For better or worse, I was impressed. That Earth Pony had been big and could have easily flattened me in a one-on-one.

Steel Curtain shrugged, as if trying to dismiss the lecture, but his ears did droop a little. “I guess not. Seemed like easy caps, though. His strength caught me by surprise.”

“Fair enough, but come on, we’ve got a long way to go. Seaddle isn’t exactly close to here,” I answered with a shrug.

Steel Curtain nodded, still grinning widely and fell into place as we made our way out of the shanty town and started heading north. We moved quickly, wanting to get as much distance behind us as possible, especially considering the weather. It was going to take at least a full day of walking to get within sight of the city, not to mention making it inside the city limits, which was not something I wanted to do after nightfall.

It struck me after a while that this was the farthest north I had been in a long time, since my parents moved us here from the coast. With that thought came a distant memory of a dream I remembered having the night Crosswire and I had been thrown from the gang. There was a structure somewhere up here that my family had used as shelter for a few days during our journey south. With luck, I would be able to find it again.

I altered our path to be slightly towards the northwest, since that was where my family had come from, so many years ago. I was working on the assumption that my parents had traveled in much the same way as I did: go in as straight a line as possible to my destination.

A few times during the mostly uneventful journey, I thought I saw something streak by overhead, something that was far too large and too fast to be a bloatsprite. Every time it passed, it also seemed to be going in the opposite direction as the time before, leading me to believe that it was following us, or at least keeping tabs on our position. When it passed us for the third time in the afternoon, I called a halt and motioned for Steel Curtain to join us from his usual position in the air.

“Hey, have you seen those things flying by overhead?” I asked the Dashite as he landed in front of us. His mane, normally styled like a Mohawk, was clinging to his head from all his sweat, a result of the heavy humidity.

“Yeah, but it’s been too far away for me to get a good look. Didn’t look like anything I’m familiar with,” he answered, his voice concerned.

“Could it have been a Pegasus?” Crosswire asked, coming up beside me.

The question made Steel Curtain hesitate, and he got a distant look in his eyes as he thought. “No, I don’t think so. The Enclave discourages any movement below the clouds that isn’t some sort of show of force. They wouldn’t send a single soldier down here. Not like that at least. Besides, the shape didn’t quite strike me as being like a pony.”

“What do you think it could be? You’re a lot closer to it than we are down here,” I pressed. I was starting to get an uneasy feeling in my gut, “What else is there that can fly that fast that’s that small? It didn’t look like it was big enough to be a dragon…”

“A dragon?!” came a startled cry from Suture, “Where?”

“It wasn’t a dragon. Far too small. Besides, they were almost completely wiped out in the war. There might have been a few survivors up in mainland Equestria, as well as a couple in other places, far from here, but not enough that we’re likely to run into one in Seaddle. Might have been a griffin, though. I know there are a few mercenary companies near this area that they might have been called in to fight for one of the various gangs downtown,” Steel Curtain swiftly reassured the maroon medic.

But that didn’t reassure me. My thoughts immediately went to the warning Starshine had given us. One of Seahawk’s lieutenants was a griffin mercenary captain named Mareina. If Greymane had gotten word back to the bastard about us, which he most surely must have done, then she would know to be on the lookout for us. So her entire mercenary company would know about us as well. If Steel Curtain was right, there was every chance that we were walking into a trap.

Deciding that that was most likely, I relayed my thoughts to the others, telling them everything I was worried about. They listened carefully, and were silent when I finally finished.

“This could be bad,” Autumn Mist stated, the first one to break the silence, “We’re going to need to be really careful. That thing looked like it was flying fast enough to try to get a message out, or something. For all we know, they could have been flying messages back and forth all day, and we’ve only seen a couple of them.

“That’s possible, but unlikely,” Steel Curtain answered her, “With the reputation she has, at least as far as the Enclave knew before I left, I would be surprised if they didn’t have some sort of radio contact between each other. We might have seen some of her forces re-deploying or something. She might be stacking her forces against us. Surely she knows what we’re capable of.”

“That seems much more likely,” Crosswire agreed with a nod, “We’ll keep moving, but we’ll have a good advantage now that we know something is up. What do you think, Evergreen?”

I remained silent, thinking over all the possibilities in my head. Steel Curtain and Crosswire had a point: It was entirely likely that Mareina was preparing an ambush for us. Hell, I’d be surprised if one of them wasn’t trying to do something against us, especially considering how our last fight against Greymane had turned out. But something was nagging at me, something I couldn’t put a hoof on.

“How many different mercenary groups with griffins in them are there?” I asked, hoping somepony would have the answer. My question was met with silence. “All right, then we’ll have to assume the worst. We’ll keep moving, but we need to be extra careful. Chances are that Mareina knows who we are, and where we are. I want everypony’s head on a swivel.”

Everypony quickly agreed, and we started moving once again, although quite a bit more carefully than before. Steel Curtain was circling over us much more than usual, watching for anything approaching from behind us, as well as from every other direction.

As the day progressed, my worry began to grow that we wouldn’t find any good shelter for the evening, but my worry was very quickly rendered unneeded. As we approached the outer limits of Seaddle’s suburbs, old ruins and shattered complexes dotted the countryside, and our surroundings gradually changed to one of empty wasteland to a ruined urban area. We weren’t in Seaddle itself, not yet, but we were close. It would make our traveling more dangerous, as anything could be living in the desiccated remains of those buildings, but it also meant that, with a little care, we could have a good place to spend the night.

We were just passing by a ruined restaurant when Steel Curtain dipped out of the sky and hovered before us. “Hey, I saw some smoke rising up from a building about three blocks away. It’s situated in a small courtyard with maybe a dozen feet of clear space on every side,” he announced.

The buildings we were traveling through must have blocked my sight. “What kind of structure did it look like?” I asked. What I wanted to know was why a building would be so isolated from everything else. Pre-war Equestria valued efficiency, especially in the design of its big cities. No open space would go to waste, especially not for something like this.

“No clue,” the Pegasus answered with a shrug, “The front was far too faded for me to make anything out. If I had to guess, it looks like some sort of recruitment center. The grounds around it weren’t paved, so they could have been some sort of testing grounds for recruits.”

It made sense, sort of. The war had lasted years, so it would follow that the cities would continue to grow, and the recruitment centers would still need their space. Now the question became what was causing the smoke. It was only late afternoon, so there was still more than enough light to see by, so simply sending in Steel Curtain to look around wouldn’t work. He would be spotted in an instant, unless he had already happened to see something.

“Were you able to tell what was causing the smoke, or if there are any ponies around there?” I asked urgently. I was starting to get nervous. It was entirely possible that we were close enough to the city that some of the gangs from the inner city could be claiming territory out here, and if that was the case, we were in a lot of trouble.

“No, the smoke was distorting my vision too much,” Steel Curtain answered, “You want me to go check it out?”

Fuck, this was not a good situation to be in. “No,” I vocalized, “There’s too much light. You’ll be spotted. Autumn, you’re good at staying hidden, right?” I asked, turning to the dark mare.

She shrugged noncommittally. “I’m all right. You want me to get up there and see if I can find anything?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. It wasn’t our usual method, but we also didn’t have much choice.

“Yeah. I’ll come along with you, just in case things go to shit. The rest of you, be ready to come in guns blazing, just in case the shit hits the fan,” I answered. Here was to hoping that we would be far enough away that my absolute crap talent at remaining unseen wouldn’t be an issue.

With everypony ready to jump at a moment’s notice, Autumn Mist and I started weaving our way through the rubble littering the streets until the acrid smell of the smoke hit our nostrils. It smelled like somepony was burning circuitry, or some other sort of technology, making me want to sneeze, or gag. Judging by Steel Curtain’s directions, the building was half a block away, on the other side of the apartment complex we were passing.

“Let’s go in here, take a look from the cover of the building,” Autumn Mist suggested, pointing a hoof at a door leading into the apartment.

“Good thinking, “I agreed, turning and approaching the door. I tried the handle, but it was locked. “Shit, the door is locked. Can you see another way inside?” I asked, turning back to the sniper.

“Gimme a sec,” she answered, her head looking form place to place as she searched for another option. Her eyes settled on something, and she trotted over to a pile of rubble that had accumulated under a window. “Over here. Boost me up, I think I can fit through this window.”

I trotted over to the rubble and climbed up as far as I could and still have sure footing, then braced myself against a jutting beam. “All right, go for it,” I said, nodding at her.

She stepped forward, climbing up onto my back. Without the weight of her armor, she would have been light. As it was, my back still hadn’t fully healed from our fight against Crackshot, and the weight of her hooves against the stitches was painful.

“Shit, this is locked too. Give me a sec, I can get it without too much sound,” she said from on top of me, her weight shifting as she moved around. A moment later, there was the sound of shattering glass, and I was pelted by falling shards.

“Hey, careful!” I growled, then grunting as the mare tried to hoist herself into the opening she had made.

“Shit, no good. The armor is just too much,” she muttered, dropping down off of me, where she started to pull her barding off. A few moment later, she was standing in nothing but her hide and Pipbuck, her armor and weapons arranged in a neat pile at the base of the rubble pile. “All right, let me try now.”

She stepped forward again, using me as a step ladder to lift herself into the window. This time, she made it through. There was a clattering of hooves on ceramic as she landed on the other side, in what must have been a bathroom, as well as a string of violent curses.

“Fuck, does nopony know how to clean up after themselves!” I heard her exclaim from the other side, a clear note of disgust in her voice. Then, she called out to me, “Okay, Evergreen, toss me my barding and weapons. Judging by what’s in here, it might be inhabited. Once you do that, I’ll make my way to the door and unlock it from this side.”

I did as she asked, sliding her rifle through the window first, followed by her barding, then finally her saddlebags. Once the last item was through, I made my way to the door, where I sat waiting for her to open it. Looking in the direction of the recruitment center, I couldn’t spot anything on my E.F.S. It was simply too far away for me to pick anything up. That, or they had stealth gear, like the zebras we had met. That was not a comforting thought.

After two minutes of waiting, I heard a quiet click from the door as the deadbolt was removed, then it slid open to reveal an Autumn Mist that was completely covered in grime. The smell hit me a moment later. She reeked of a badly maintained bathroom. “Don’t say a fucking word,” she snapped, “Whatever fuckers trashed this place liked throwing their shit everywhere, literally.”

I held my tongue, but couldn’t stop the grin that was rewarded with an absolutely murderous glare from the mare. “So where to now?” I asked, “You’re better at this shit than I am.”

“This way. We need to get to the top floor, then find a window facing the courtyard. If there is something up here, I would recommend using your .45, rather than that revolver. Everypony for three blocks will hear it if you shoot that thing in here,” She answered, her horn glowing as she drew her own pistol.

I nodded and grabbed the smaller pistol from my saddlebags. It didn’t have even close to the same weight as Hammer did, making me feel much more vulnerable, but I couldn’t argue with the logic.

We made our way as quietly as we could through the building, literally slogging through the crap that Autumn had described, avoiding windows whenever we could. It was amazing to see just how dirty this place was, and it was more than just the passage of centuries. Autumn Mist led the way, stepping carefully around anything that looked unstable, or that might cause a lot of noise. I couldn’t see anything on the E.F.S., but as we had learned, that didn’t mean that nothing was there. After a few minutes, we had made it to the top, running into nothing more dangerous than a small colony of radroaches that had studiously ignored us.

Autumn Mist pushed open a door into an apartment and crept along the wall until she was next to the one dirty window that looked out on the courtyard. I followed her in, being just as careful, picking my way around the abused desk and walking on the tips of my hooves around the three bottles’ worth of shattered glass on the floor. Autumn was leaning on a dresser that was next to the window, leaning over it so she could try to peer out the window. Unfortunately, there was far too much grime on it at the moment for us to see through.

“Shit, I was worried about that. Evergreen, see if you can find a rag or something to wipe a small hole in this shit. If you can make it wet, it will work better,” she said, sliding her rifle out of its loop and carefully unscrewing the scope from it.

The only thing I could find that might work was a piece of the filthy shredded sheet that was somehow still clinging to the wire bedframe. I ducked down low to avoid passing in front of the mirror and crept over there, depositing my pistol on the ground and pulling out my knife. I cut a small square off of the sheet, then crept back to Autumn, where I pulled out a bottle of dirty water and soaked the rag.

My Pipbuck now clicking slowly at me, I handed it to the sniper, who grabbed it in her mouth and carefully wiped away some of the grime from the side of the mirror. She then grabbed her scope with her magic and held it up to the small hole and peered through.

“See anything?” I asked after a few moments.

“There isn’t much, but I did see a few shadows. Here, take a look,” the sniper said, moving to the side so I could look.

I grabbed the scope in a hoof and held it up to the hole in the grime. The recruitment center was built like a cube, seated perfectly in the middle of the courtyard, with one of its corners facing us. The top floor had been blown apart, and the smoke was curling up from the corner to the left of the one facing us. As Autumn Mist had said, I could make out the shadows of movement on the top floor, but they seemed to be concentrated around something. The building was simply too far away for me to make out what it could be.

“Hey, Autumn, is there any way to zoom in closer on these guys?” I asked, looking away just long enough to see the mare’s horn glow, grabbing a dial on the scope, and twist it.

“Try it now,” she said, her voice tense. I could tell that she knew I had seen something.

I peered back through the scope and centered the sights on what the shadows were moving around. Strapped down on a table near the large fire was the shape of a creature that could only be a griffin. I could make out the stain of what might have been blood around the areas where the ropes were binding it. There were several ponies circling around him, many of them carrying or floating weapons. On the far wall of the room I could make out a symbol on the wall. It looked like a pony’s skull with a dagger stuck in one eye socket.

I pulled back from the window and handed the scope to Autumn Mist. “Take a look. There’s a griffin being held captive, and I’m pretty sure these fuckers are a gang. Look at the symbol on the wall.”

The sniper peered through the scope for a few moments, then backed up, nodding. “Looks like it. One of Mareina’s, you think?” she asked me, floating up her rifle and reattaching the scope.

“Might be, but I don’t think so. It wasn’t wearing any armor, and what little clothing it did have was in tatters. Besides, I can’t see a mercenary group as powerful as that simply letting one of their members get caught and not immediately start a war to bust them out,” I answered.

Autumn Mist nodded in agreement. “We’re saving him, then?” The tone of her voice told me immediately that she wanted to, if only to get rid of a gang that tied someone up like that.

“Yeah. Stay up here, but if you can find a better vantage point in one of the other rooms, go for it. I’ll make my way back to the others and we’ll start the attack. Once you see us going in, support us,” I answered, already heading back for the door.

“Sounds good. I’ll meet you up there once everything is clear,” the sniper answered, following me out as she went on the hunt for a better perch.

I picked my way back the way we came, and before long I was rejoining the rest of my friends. Crosswire was pacing, tracking back and forth across the small yard where they were waiting. Steel Curtain was simply sitting and cleaning out the barrels from one of his miniguns, and Suture was taking the chance to eat a quick meal. As soon as I was in sight, Crosswire rounded on me.

“So what’s going on? Where’s Autumn Mist?” he demanded, trotting up to me.

I quickly laid out the situation, up to and including Autumn’s and my thoughts on the captured griffin. When I was finished, I was met with three thoughtful, not to mention nervous, expressions.

“It could be one of hers,” Steel Curtain said, “Even with the appearance or behavior not matching professional mercs, it could be.”

“I know, but if it isn’t… I just can’t leave them to die,” I answered, “Fuck, no one deserves to be tortured, not even raiders.”

“I agree. We should try to help,” Suture added, “I’m not saying we should trust them, but Evergreen is right. They don’t deserve that.”

“Whatever you decide, I’m with you,” Crosswire said, “If you think the griffin deserves our help, then let’s help it.”

“Well, Steel Curtain?” I asked, turning to the armored Dashite.

“My point is only that we can’t know for sure. But if you think it’s the right call, I’m in,” he answered simply, “So where do you want me?”

I smiled broadly at the Dashite. “In the air. You’ll come in at them from the sky and keep them suppressed, at least long enough for the rest of us to get inside the building so we can fight our way up. I’ll take point, and Crosswire will bring up the rear. Suture, I want you between us, watching for anything coming at us from the side. I have a feeling that they’re going to want to kill the griffin as soon as they know they’re under attack. Autumn Mist will do what she can to support us, but I want that griffin kept alive,” I ordered, looking from pony to pony as I gave my instructions.

“Sounds like a plan. How many do you think are inside?” Crosswire asked, floating out his SMG.

“There could be a few dozen in there, for all we know. I saw several up on the top floor, but the smoke was obscuring any good chance at counting. Building looks to be an outpost for one of the inner city gangs, though. I’m hoping it’s only a minor one,” I answered.

“Fair enough. At least in the halls of a building numbers won’t count for much,” the unicorn tech stated, racking the bolt of the SMG.

“All right, everypony ready?” I asked, looking each one of them in the eye. Steel curtain finished reassembling his gun, then nodded at me. The other two followed suit. “Then let’s move.”

We set out in a loose formation, Steel Curtain hovering slightly above us until we got close enough for him to begin his attack. We managed to get to the corner of one of the intersecting streets without incident, and I nodded up to the Dashite. He nodded back, slipped on his helmet, and took off into the sky. A second later, the distinctive sound of his miniguns split the near-silence of the ruins, followed by panicked shouts and the retort of Autumn’s rifle.

As soon as the chaos started, I ran, making straight for the closest door, Hammer in my mouth. Not wanting to take a chance that it was locked, I aimed and fired mid-stride, the bullet impacting the door at the handle and blasting the locking mechanism to pieces amongst a shower of splinters and bits of metal. I shouldered my way through the door and cleared off to the side of the lobby to give Suture and Crosswire space to get in.

The room was nearly empty, except for two very startled ponies that were still in the process of trying to figure out what all the noise was. One was a red unicorn stallion with an orange mane that had a riot shotgun leaning against the wall next to him. The other was a white earth pony mare with a scraggly blue mane. A small black SMG was attached to her barding. Both of them looked at us, expressions of shock plastered on their faces. Then, the unicorn’s horn started glowing orange, and the shotgun floated from the wall.

I immediately slipped into S.A.T.S., lining up a pair of shots to the unicorn’s head, trusting Crosswire to take care of the mare. I activated the spell, and the first round flew true, slamming into the unicorn’s head at the base of his horn. He head snapped back, blood, bone, and bits of brain painting the wall behind him. The second round slammed into his now exposed throat, resulting in a minor explosion of blood, splattering the mare who was shocked into dropping her weapon.

A staccato of gunfire followed from Crosswire’s SMG, and a half-dozen holes opened up in the mare’s body and she collapsed into a swiftly growing pool of blood. “Let’s move! We still have the advantage of surprise!” Crosswire exclaimed, advancing on the bodies and efficiently stripping them of their weapons, ammo, and caps.

I nodded and took off down the nearest hallway, looking for a staircase. A quick glance at my E.F.S. revealed about a dozen red bars, far less than I had been expecting for the size of the building. We met no more resistance on the ground floor, but as we pushed up the first stairway we found, I could hear chatter coming from upstairs.

“Who the fuck is attacking us?” A harsh, deep voice was demanding, “And don’t tell me it’s the fucking Enclave again! Those fucks don’t give two shits about the wasteland!”

“Who the fuck else can it be? There’s a fucking armored Pegasus with a pair of miniguns raining down hell on us!” a voice absolutely quaking with terror answered. Judging by the volume, they must have been awfully close to the stairwell.

I slowed my pace, motioning to Suture and Crosswire to do the same. If they weren’t saying anything about an attack from downstairs, they must have not heard our gunfire over the din coming from outside. Taking the opportunity to replace the three rounds I had fired, I crept slowly up the stairs. At the top, I stuck my head around the corner and spotted three ponies standing in a room less than twenty feet from me.

I checked my saddlebags and pulled out a frag grenade. Steel Curtain had found a couple of the small explosives in Metro, and I was more than happy to have that option available again. I motioned for Crosswire and Suture to step back, then pulled the stem and rolled the grenade into the room.

“I’m telling you, it can’t be the fucking Enclave! Somepony get the fuck out there and tell me who is atta-“ the buck’s rant was cut off as the grenade exploded. In its place were agonized screams and a few panicked shouts. In my E.F.S., several bars started to move erratically. There must have been several ponies nearby that had been outside the blast radius.

“Move!” I shouted at my two friends, even as I drew Hammer again, then vaulted around the corner, head turning in search for my first target.

Unfortunately, he found me first. A barrage of bullets impacted my side, though my armor easily deflected the low caliber rounds. I swung my head around to the source of the gunfire to spot a young unicorn mare wielding a small submachine gun. A split-second of aiming, and I sent a round ramming into her chest, sending her to the ground where she proceeded to cough up dark globs of blood.

I switched direction and ran into the room towards the dying mare, vaulting over her body and coming out through a different door into an almost identical hallway. Here, three ponies were taking cover, two Earth Ponies and one unicorn, all of them wearing shocked expressions as I emerged.

Only one of them was even close to facing the right direction to direct their fire at me, and the blue bar in my E.F.S. told me that either Crosswire or Suture would be emerging around the corner on the other side of the hallway. I slipped into S.A.T.S. and line up a shot for the Earth Pony that was facing me. My best shot was an eighty percent chance to hit his head. Perfect. He was wielding a heavy revolver that he was trying to center on my chest, but he was far too slow.

The spell activated, sending a round straight into his head, turning his skull unto a mess of blood and bone. I launched myself forward, pushing off of the still-collapsing body to collide with the pink unicorn mare behind him. She was still turning in my direction, bringing a relatively well-maintained assault rifle to bear. I hit with my shoulder, driving her head into the wall and bringing her down to the ground.

By this time, Crosswire was turning the corner, and he unleashed a volley of gunfire on the last Earth Pony mare, eviscerating her and splattering both me and the unicorn with gore.

She fought viciously, her magic still gripping the assault rifle as she tried to bring it to bear against me. I smacked the weapon with a hoof, deflecting it away and sending the burst into the dead Earth Pony behind me, then brought my hoof down on her horn, eliciting a shriek of pain. She kicked viciously, catching me in my relatively lightly armored stomach and driving the breath from my lungs.

The maneuver bought her a little space, and her horn glowed again as she tried to bring the rifle to bear. Unluckily for her, I felt the barrel brush the back of my mane. I dodged my head to the side just as the weapon fired. One round skimmed painfully off my neck, but every single bullet from the burst shot past to bury themselves in the mare’s head, killing her instantly and spraying the side of my face with blood. The rifle bounced painfully off the back of my head to come to a rest next to the mare’s corpse.

I pushed myself away from the corpse, using her barding to clear the blood from my eyes, then ran off in search of Suture. I found her cornered in a room a dozen feet away, facing a pair of Earth Pony brutes, one wielding a machete, and the other a shotgun. She was holding her pistol in her mouth, and Machete was bleeding from a bullet wound in his leg. Crosswire was nowhere to be seen.

“You’re going to die now, cunt!” Machete screamed just as I rounded the corner, and leapt at Suture.

I ran into the room, aiming at Machete, but Suture fired, and a 9mm round buried itself perfectly in the brute’s head, going in through his right eye and sending his body careening into the ground. I shifted my aim at Shotgun and pulled the trigger, sending a pair of bullets into his chest, sending him to the ground, then finished him off with a third shot to the head. I didn’t want to have to kill him, but there was simply too much going on for me to risk it.

“You all right?” I asked the medic, panting as I caught my breath. Suture’s face was drained of all color as she stared at the fallen buck in front of her. I swung the cylinder out of Hammer, emptying the spent shells and reloading.

“Yeah… I… I just killed somepony,” she muttered under her breath, her voice shaking. She was on the verge of tears, and I did not have time to deal with this, but she was going into shock. I was reminded rather sharply of the first time she had killed the ghoul back in the Stable.

“Come on, Suture, snap out of it!” I shouted, trying to get through to her, “He was going to kill you! Was mid-swing with a blow that would have decapitated you if you didn’t shoot!”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she muttered, tearing her eyes away from the corpse and looking at me. Her stare was completely blank, and tears were starting to form in her eyes.

“It’s going to be all right, now let’s go! Crosswire still needs help!” I exclaimed, putting a hoof on her shoulder to show my support. I then turned and ran back out the door, running after the blue bar on my E.F.S. that could only be Crosswire. It was currently tangled with at least four red bars.

The sound of hooves behind me told me that Suture was right behind me. At least she was still well enough in control to follow. We made our way through the building and to the nearest stairwell. It seemed that the only remaining sounds of battle were coming from upstairs.

At the top of the staircase, Crosswire was hunkered down behind a bullet-ridden desk, four ragged ponies lined up on the far side of the room. The rain that was slowly starting to drizzle down immediately let me know that we were on the top floor. Several bodies were cast about, some of them eviscerated from Steel Curtain’s support, and more nearly decapitated from Autumn Mist’s rifle. The survivors were all huddled together under the small piece of roof that was still standing, at just the right angle from the building Autumn was in so she couldn’t see them. The smoke from the fire was off to our right, thankfully downwind.

“How’s the situation?” I asked, ducking down next to the tech.

‘Bad. They’re threatening to kill the griffin if we don’t back down. He’s over there,” Crosswire answered, tossing his head somewhere off to our left, towards a wall I couldn’t see around.

“Have they made any other demands?” I asked, fairly sure they were going to follow through with that threat if we weren’t careful.

“No, just that. What are you thinking?” he asked me, looking up at me with a determined glare. I knew exactly what he expected me to say.

“I’ll try to talk them down. If not, I’ve got this,” I answered, reaching into my saddlebags for another grenade. They were more than close enough that I knew I’d be able to reach them with a well-aimed buck.

The tech nodded somberly, then loaded his SMG with a fresh clip. “Well, if you’re going to try diplomacy, you better start now.”

“Hey, all your friends downstairs are dead! Drop your weapons and come out slowly, and we’ll let you leave! All we want is the griffin!” I shouted, hopefully loud and clear enough to be heard.

“Fuck you, cunt! If you don’t back off right fucking now, you can kiss the featherbrain good-bye!” a harsh female voice answered, though there was a note of desperation in the voice. They knew they were fucked, they were simply trying to save face.

“No deal. We have the better position, and the better guns. This is your last warning!” I shouted. I really wanted them to take the deal. Far too many ponies had already died today.

“Fuck you and your deal!” was the only answer I got.

Crosswire shot me a knowing glance, and I sighed. A quick look at Suture showed me that the mare was still in shock, but I could see a hardening look come into her eyes. “Save him,” she muttered, just barely loud enough to be heard, “It’s why we came here, why I… killed somepony.”

I nodded at her, then took a step back from the desk. “I fucking warned them,” I swore, then pulled the stem from the grenade, tossed it into the air, and bucked it towards them.

My aim was perfect, and I heard the sound of scrambling hooves, immediately followed by an explosion and agonized screams.

“Kill the gri-“ the mare started to shout, but was cut off by the loud retort of Autumn Mist’s rifle.

I leapt out of cover, only to see a pony lying in the open, a pool of blood forming around the now headless body. Another pony-shape was draped over the cabinet they had been using as cover, the barding riddles with blood and shrapnel. The last two ponies were lying in a rapidly expanding pool of blood. One of the two was dead, and the other was rapidly bleeding out from a severed artery in her throat. I pulled out Hammer and ended her misery with a single bullet.

“Crosswire, Suture, see to the griffin. Make sure he’s all right!” I shouted over my shoulder as I searched the sky for Steel Curtain. I finally spotted him making a pass from the west, and waved him down. “Go get Autumn Mist and tell her it’s safe to join us!” I shouted at him. He nodded smartly and took off towards the apartment building.

I then turned and joined my friends at the griffin’s side. They already had him untied, and Suture was woodenly treating the chafe wounds on his wrists and ankles. She was probably finding solace in doing something she was familiar with. No doubt she’d have an emotional breakdown when we finally settled down for the night.

The griffin was panting heavily, a transparent lid in his eyes blinking rapidly as Suture treated him. He was wearing a tattered duster overtop of what could only be a basic combat harness. I could see several pockets for ammo, as well as a couple of holsters strung underneath his shoulders. Effective gear, but hardly exceptional. As impressive a creature as the griffin was, he simply didn’t strike me as a hardened mercenary. My gut told me that we would have nothing to fear from him, but I wasn’t going to let my guard down.

“So how did a flier like you get captured by a bunch of fucks like them?” I asked, walking up to his side.

He turned his head and fixed me in his sharp yellow gaze. “Fucked up and landed somewhere that looked safe without clearing the surrounding area,” he answered, “You can see how that worked out. What are you going to do with me?”

“I already did it. You’re free, aren’t you?” I asked, gesturing to the cut ropes on the ground.

“Seriously, no debt?” he asked, raising an eye ridge in disbelief, “I don’t believe it.”

I shrugged and turned around, looking at my E.F.S. for a sign from Autumn Mist or Steel Curtain. I spotted both of them, coming at us from the direction of the apartment building Autumn had used as cover. They were probably moving together, just in case we had missed something. “You don’t have to believe it. Doesn’t make it any less true,” I answered, “I saw someone in need, so I lent a helping hoof. It’s what I hope others would do for me.”

“Fuck, you don’t see much of that out here,” the griffin answered, rolling off the table and standing on his own as Suture wrapped the last bandage around one of his limbs, “Thanks, I guess.”

“Don’t mention it. What brought you to Seaddle anyway?” I asked, turning and fixing the griffin in a questioning glare, “I haven’t seen a lot of griffin’s out here. Any, actually.”

Now it was the griffin’s turn to shrug. “Seemed like a good idea at the time. Home got a bit too restrictive, so I figured I’d try my luck out here. I’ve only been in the city a couple of days. It didn’t turn out quite as I’d hoped. I’ve been on that table for almost twenty-four hours.”

I could understand the feeling all too well. It’s how I almost ended up dead in the mountains before I stumbled on the raider gang. From there, it had only been stupid luck that hadn’t seen me become one of their victims. “Well, at least you’re still in one piece. That’s more than most get.”

“Don’t I know it,” the griffin answered with a hollow laugh, his gaze roaming about the room and settling on the disfigured corpses littering it. “So, who exactly do I owe my rescue to?” he asked nervously after a few moments of silence.

“Name’s Evergreen. The grey unicorn is Crosswire, and the medic is Suture. Autumn Mist and Steel Curtain are on their way up as we speak,” I answered, letting a thin smile creep onto my face, “What about you? What’s your name?”

“Marcus,” he answered quickly, “So what brings you to Seaddle? You don’t look like you belong to one of the gangs.”

“I’m trying to get to Shooting Star’s radio station. I need to talk to him about some stuff,” I answered vaguely just as Autumn Mist and Steel Curtain came up the staircase.

“Evergreen, you would not believe what we found!” the dark mare exclaimed as she emerged, the smell from the building she had spent so long holed up in immediately spreading to me and making me want to gag. Thankfully, I held the reaction back. “These fuckers must have been heavily involved with some drug trade out here to get a fortune like this!” She floated out a rather large bag the clinked metallically as she set it down.

I walked over and opened it up. Inside, the bag was absolutely filled with caps. A fortune like this would take care of any of our financial needs for the next couple of months, if not more. “Holy shit,” I exclaimed, not finding any other words to properly sum up how I felt, “Nice find. Grab anything else of interest?”

“Just some weapons and ammo that we can trade when we get back to civilization,” the mare answered, nodding her head at both her and Steel Curtain’s bulging saddlebags. Several weapons were hanging off of the sniper’s sides, and Steel Curtain had a couple of shotguns hanging off his armor.

“Good work. Oh, this is Marcus, by the way. The griffin we saved,” I answered, nodding at him.

He inclined his head awkwardly, as if suddenly nervous about being around so many of us. “Fuck, wasn’t expecting to see an Enclave soldier out here,” he said nervously, his eyes fixed on Steel Curtain, who was still wearing his helmet.

As if on cue, the Dashite pulled his helmet off and ran a hoof through his mane, trying to restore it to some sense of order. “I’m a Dashite. Just managed to get away with my armor,” he answered stiffly.

Marcus visibly relaxed. “Oh, good. Haven’t met an Enclave soldier yet that likes us griffins. They don’t seem to trust us much.”

“They don’t like anything that could potentially threaten them, and the griffins are one of the few species that managed to survive the war mostly intact,” Steel Curtain answered gruffly.

“I guess that makes sense,” Marcus said, scratching his head with a taloned hand, “Never really thought about that.”

“Nopony ever does,” the Dashite muttered sadly, walking past him to where Crosswire and Suture were sitting, the former quietly speaking to the latter.

The silence lengthened as Autumn and I talked about the various bits of salvage she had picked up in the building and Steel Curtain and Crosswire tried to console Suture. We would be moving on soon to find somewhere safe, but I also wanted to see what the griffin would do.

He seemed to be standing awkwardly, his eyes darting from me to Steel Curtain, almost unsure of what to do. After several minutes of simply standing there, he approached me. “So, Evergreen, I feel like I owe you something for saving my life. Even though I’ve only spent a couple of days in Seaddle, I do know where that DJ’s station is. What do you say to me leading you there, to repay you?” he asked.

I wasn’t expecting the offer, and I’m pretty sure my look of surprise told the buck just that. “Uh, yeah sure. We were going to make our last push there in the morning, since it’s getting late, and we’re still just on the outskirts of the city,” I managed to get out.

“That’s settled then! Tomorrow, I’ll lead you all to the radio station! Did you have a plan for where you were going to sleep tonight?” he asked with a grin, or at least as much of one as he could manage with a beak, “Also, did any of you happen to find a pair of pistols that don’t have mouthgrips?”

“Yeah, I found a couple downstairs,” Autumn Mist answered, her horn glowing brightly as she floated a pair of wicked-looking pistols, and a few magazines of ammo to go with them, out of her bags and over to the griffin. He smiled broadly and grabbed them, checking to make sure they were loaded, then slipped them into the holsters under his shoulders.

“I’m not sure exactly where we were going to stay. Probably somewhere small and out of the way,” I answered to his other question, “Why, you know a place with all your experience?” A chagrined look came over his face at that.

“Well, no. It was just a question,” he muttered quietly.

“Don’t worry about it. We’ll figure it out,” I said, walking past him to where my three other friends were still sitting.

Suture seemed to be sitting straighter, but her ears were still drooped on her head. I walked up behind her and placed a hoof on her shoulder. “Are you all right, Suture? I know that wasn’t easy, but I hope you know it had to be done.”

The words tasted like ash in my mouth. I had literally told her not two days ago that I didn’t want this to happen to her, and now here we were. I felt like I had failed her somehow.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” she muttered, her eyes still downcast, “Was it like this for you, the first time. Did you regret it?”

A memory of a lost and frightened Stable Dweller came to mind. I had been young, starving, and wounded, and that pony had had everything I would need to survive. In desperation, I had pulled out my knife and jumped her from behind and knifed her down, ending her life bloodily. It hadn’t been a quick or clean kill. “Yeah, I regret it,” I answered, “And I spent the next three days crying my heart out in the wasteland.”

In many ways, that kill had been the beginning of my path down the dark road that had ended with me in charge of that raider gang. I still remembered the look of fear and pain I had seen in that poor mare’s eyes while I stabbed her, over and over again.

The maroon mare lifted her head and fixed me in a gaze so sad I felt my own heart sink into my stomach and tears start to form in my eyes. “Why is it so easy for you now?” she asked, a note of desperation creeping into her voice.

I had to remind myself that, compared to almost every other pony in the wasteland, Suture had led a privileged life. Her parents were still alive, and she still had a home. “Because my life became one of kill or be killed. Almost every single day from the day I killed that first pony, I was forced to kill in order to save my own hide. After a while… I guess I just got used to it. I’m not proud of it, by any means, but there isn’t much I can do about it now,” I said with a shrug. This wasn’t a topic I particularly wanted to linger on, especially as Yaari’s words were starting to come back to me.

Here was another perfect example of how everything I did simply led to more death. In an attempt to save a griffin I didn’t even know, I now had the blood of a dozen more ponies on my hooves. The cycle was never-ending.

“Please don’t let that happen to me,” Suture muttered, her head going back to staring at the ground again.”

I stared at the mare, hoping with all my heart that I would be able to hold to the next words I was about to speak. “I promise.”

Level Up!

Perk Gained: Intense Training: Perception +1

Skill notes: Explosives (75)

{Well, writing this chapter certainly took far less time than I had hoped, which is something that makes me happy! Also, this chapter was brilliant for me in terms of brainstorming some of the next events (clarification: I have an ending in mind, but everything between there and here is more or less determined by how my characters deal with what’s going on), so a lot of fun things are going to be happening in the next few chapters. Thanks (and credit) as always go to KKat for the original Fallout: Equestria. Thanks, also as always, to me editors, MUCKSTER and Cody. As always, the Hub page is available on Google Docs here.}