Crystal Haze
Chapter 18: Part 4, ch. 1 -- "Fire Inside..."
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1
"Fire Inside..."
A week passed by rather quickly, as things were still a bit unsettled. That's a given when two ponies about to get married. Derpy and Cloudfire were as excited as they were exhausted, yet despite their tension, neither pony projected at the other even the tiniest hint of irritability. They still had plenty to be happy about, after all...
During this short time, the wall-eyed Pegasus came home twice from her litter pick-up job, still shaking with exhaustion, but... at least it wasn't as bad as it had been before. Things had changed there and was she working much harder now than she physically could (or should) in the parks and fields... but the reality of her situation was that she could barely keep up. While some days she came home with energy, others she did not, and her fiancée just accepted this. Also exhausted from the workload, Cloudfire was beside himself with worry over her state... but he didn't care to share much of that with anypony. He simply held her tight on the long bus ride home until her shaking subsided and she drifted off peacefully for a nap. At least she wasn't shaking in bed anymore.
With the wedding coming up in just 10 days, there was much confusion and stress. Planning had yet to be done in any great detail, and although Rarity and Pinkie Pie were going to be coordinating the event at a reduced rate they were very eager to get a dialogue going. That simply added to the stress, confusion, and of course, joy felt by all ponies involved... especially Cloudfire, who'd seen enough generosity coming out of all the ponies around him. Derpy's response to the stress was to simply pretend things would be magically taken care of... it didn't surprise Cloudfire that some of the planning may have in fact been above her head, but minor details they'd been asking her for: where, time of day, type of cake to have... they could not get a straight answer out of her. A headache for many involved, but understandable all the same for the ponies who knew Derpy well enough to know what she was really saying:
I want to, but this is really big, and I'm nervous and shy.
There was one constant, however. One thing at the end of the day that comforted both their tired minds and didn't demand any particular amount of focus or attention. Each night the soon to be married ponies slept peacefully curled up on Derpy's bed, now their bed. With warm bodies wrapped tightly around each other... Cloudfire continued to double as Derpy's teddy bear as she drifted off snuggling his muscular frame.
Derpy Hooves loved Cloudfire and felt safe next to his body. It comforted her even when she shook the worst on the long ride. The rare times she woke up while it was still dark out he was still there with her, and she found herself looking up at him in the faint moonlight with complete wonder as he breathed deep in his sleep. The Earth Pony was always there for her. When she was afraid, he gave her strength. When she was mad, he made her laugh. When she was happy, he shared the joy with her. He never asked for anything in return, except that Derpy continue to be herself. This is how she saw it and it wasn't far from the truth.
Truth was, Cloudfire hadn't been sleeping all that well. He'd been keeping it away from them all... well, almost all of them. He'd fall asleep fine, but occasionally he'd jolt awake in the middle of the night and stay up for the rest. It was usually because he'd had a nightmare. What exactly was happening in the nightmares, he hadn't told anypony...
They were always the same. He and Derpy would be on familiar grounds in Ponyville. Not bothering anypony, they would be lost together in a wonderful moment of joy and peace. Around them, out living their own lives, would be the ponies Derpy cared deeply about... Apple Jack, Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie, even Rainbow Dash. He would feel content knowing that they were all there, too, and he'd even venture far enough to say he actually felt happy somewhere for once... like he was going to stay forever. The fact that this feeling was spilling over into real life simply intensified this dilemma, especially since in his dream something unpleasant usually followed this:
A pony half his size would worm a way in from the shadows on his blind side... this pony would then ruin it. "It" being their shared happiness -- the intruder would somehow become hostile towards Derpy and their relationship before Cloudfire could even react. Nasty, horrible things would spill from that pony's mouth like rancid, rabid foam. The small Pegasus would be defenseless against the rancor, going instantly from smiles to tears. Worst part of this torture is that a couple times it came from a pony he'd once known, from someplace far away...
Throughout his daily life, he'd heard much of this negativity in Ponyville already, though that had long faded. Hushed whispers and mean looks used to fill the corners of squares when he was out and about living life... it only made sense that in a dream it would be no different... if anything, less real. It ate at him because it was as though he still expected to hear these things during the day, but didn't. Not now. He should be happy, because he respected and loved Derpy, and was always there for her, but... why was he bothered so much by something that didn't even exist?
Cloudfire was confused.
* * *
Three nearly sleepless nights in a row -- one where he stayed in bed and stared into the ceiling, two where he got up without waking Derpy and silently snunk down to the can. Afterwards he'd find himself standing in either the stairwell or the living room, staring off into space... wondering what was happening to his mind. Perhaps he was being too introspective, and was just not used to having somepony so wonderful so close... Derpy was, in his mind, quite a wonderful pony to be in love with. It made sense to him that maybe what he was feeling was fear. After all, to have somepony subvert their relationship with no cause... to lose her now to doubt and anger he could not protect her from, especially doubt and anger about him... that would be devastating. He didn't know for sure what this feeling was, but his body told him he might be afraid. He'd woken up to vomit one time a week before, and each time since he bolted up feeling he was going to be sick yet again.
On the third night of this sleepless pattern Cloudfire could at least relax a little... he and his fiancée had the following day off to make an outline with their coordinators. He'd gotten up quietly and went downstairs to pee, standing in the living room afterwards to reflect on his nightmare. As he had the night before in the stairwell, he breathed slowly and deeply... trying to relax. It came out more shallow than intended, and turned into hyperventilating before he even realized it. From the kitchen came the sound of a faint pop... followed by a fizz. He felt a presence shuffle in his direction from next room, and could see Daddy Hooves's dim outline in the kitchen doorway:
"You alright?"
Cloudfire laughed, hiding his anxiety with false humor as he sat down in a chair:
"I'm so used to you being up by now I half expect it!"
Daddy Hooves sat across the room in his own chair:
"Why were you breathing like that? Do you need a doctor... or just somepony to talk to? You can talk to me."
"I think I'm just nervous..." He replied, twiddling his hooves. "Say, if you've got an extra... can I have a Cola, too?"
"By all means!" The older Unicorn passed him a bottle using his magic. "I think maybe you two have been spending too much time in doors."
The Earth Pony opened the bottle, taking a swig of the sweet caffeinated liquid, thinking about what to say next:
"In four days we'll be off in the wilderness. You've yet to show us your famous spot, dad."
"I will later if you like... after we talk with Rarity and Pinkie. We'll have lunch there."
"Sounds good."
Daddy Hooves paused, taking a long sip before beginning his next thought:
"Cloudfire, I was thinking..."
The Earth Pony laughed, taking a quick sip:
"Thinking, Dad? That's dangerous..."
Daddy Hooves shook his head, chuckling as he explained... in a relaxed tone of voice his soon to be son-in-law had yet to hear:
"I was thinking, Cloudfire... How 'bout we take a day trip afterwards? All three of us... maybe get your minds off this stressful wedding and on to more carefree things. How's the big city sound? I'm thinking Philideplhia."
Sipping his soda a bit longer this time, the Earth Pony replied:
"Why go all the way there?"
The Unicorn chuckled:
"Get some camping supplies for you two. A special trip... I know, I know... you don't want me to get you anything special. Consider it an early birthday or Hearth's Warming Eve present to you both. I was going to go myself for the occasion, surprise you two before your trip, but... maybe you might like to tag along and have some say. Besides, the only place to go to get good quality supplies for a trip is the city. Ponyville supplies would be just fine, granted... but you two are getting married soon. I only want the best for you both. What'd do you say?"
Cloudfire was quick to respond:
"I wouldn't want to inconvenience you..."
Daddy Hooves was just as quick:
"Inconvenience me, Cloudfire?" He chuckled. "This is my idea, son, that I was ready to do by myself. You must not be feeling well!"
"Honestly, I'm not..." Cloudfire again took a long drink from his soda, still thinking. "Where abouts in Philidelphia would we be going?"
"Just to the Surefire store by bus. I imagine if we left here in the middle afternoon we could be back by sunset. What'd ya say?"
The idea of going to the city for these items seemed absurd... but to Surefire's? The suggestion triggered a visible reaction in the ivory Earth Pony, which fortunately it was too dark to see. Just in case, Cloudfire covered for it with a laugh:
"Isn't that a little expensive?"
"It's my treat... Please don't make me beg. You won't like it."
"You're already treating us enough, but... fine," Cloudfire finished his soda, setting it in front of his chair. "If Derpy wants to go, then I'll come along, too."
"Splendid! I haven't been there in years."
The Earth Pony got up from his chair and turned towards the stairs:
"It's been a while for me, too... since I've been to any city shops." Cloudfire stretched, hoping to give the impression he was in a more leisurely mood than he actually felt. "I'm going to go back to bed... see you in a few hours then?"
"It certainly seems that way." Daddy Hooves laughed, watching his future son-in-law's silhouette approach the stairs. "I never had the reason to go back there until now... you were right when you said things are expensive, but you two are worth it to me. Everything I do for you two I don't just do for Derpy... you know that, right Cloudfire?"
The Earth Pony stopped dead in his tracks, lowering his head... there was a long pause.
"Dad?"
"Yes son?"
"Thanks."
He then left the older pony sitting in the living room. He ascended the stairs to his sleeping fiancées room, eager to get back to bed.
After he left, Daddy Hooves got up slowly... knocking the bottle over which was set next to Cloudfire's chair. He looked up in the direction of the stairs as he heard the door gently close:
That is not like him...
Next Chapter: Part 4, Ch. 2 -- "At Both Ends." Estimated time remaining: 60 Minutes