Equestria.

Equestria is a big place. Vast horizons stretching from one coast to the next, dotted with settlements of pony, griffon, and half a dozen other species in climates of every kind. The map on my wall did its best to explain the majesty of the land, but nothing really ever compared to traveling it myself. Never has.

The map was old, the paper worn to a brown hue from age and trauma. Notes and sketches were crammed into all the empty spaces that could be found, and even more filled the sheets of paper pinned to its surface. I had stared at and labored over the map for pretty much all of my adult life. I could tell you the best way to get from any city to the next, including landmarks and shortcuts, plus all the towns nearby it important to my trade. I made my bits buying low and selling high, taking advantage of any difference in supply and demand that I could find.

The sunlight filtering through the window suddenly moved from the map to my face in a way that was very, very, bright and antagonizing. How does such a filthy glass let so much light through when I don’t want it? Whenever I actually needed it, it was never there.

What was I just doing…? I sighed inwardly. I get lost in maps too easy.

“No! I’m telling you, the problem isn’t the delivery system! It’s the electrolysis matrix!”

Nothing like the sound of arguing mares to clear the morning fog. I remembered what I was doing: checking over my logs to make sure everything was still in order. It was unlikely that anything had changed since last night, but it never hurt to be safe. It would bother me all day if I didn’t check it, anyways.

“By Celestia’s sparkly mane, you’re gonna kill us all! Just let me look at- “ A loud slam cut through the ship.

“I don’t have time for your foalish ideas! Do you have any grasp of how difficult it is to maintain this rusty old engine!? Your idiotic meddling doesn’t help!”

“Maybe if we didn’t have you working on it, it wouldn’t break down so friggin’ much!” A frustrated equine scream followed by a worrying metallic groan emerged from the ship, and I prayed that nothing too expensive had been broken.

We were traveling to Manehattan with my share of the latest harvest of Ponyville zapapples. They were regularly one of my most lucrative runs, even with my admittedly small hold in the market.

“What do you mean ‘we’? It’s my job to maintain the engine! I’m the cloudgineer! I’m the one who understands how this works! You get back to your plumbing or whatever it is you do!”

“You break everything!”

“I break everything!? Go set something on fire and stick your mane in it!”

The sound of a furious tussle leaked through the walls.

My stomach rumbled. Time for breakfast. Pouring over charts does no good if I die of starvation, after all. I glanced at the map one last time before leaving my quarters, entering a combination of a hallway and antechamber. Here, the three quarters, cargo bay, engine room, lounge, and stairway to the navigation floor above all came together. The sounds of conflict continued to leak out of the engine room, while the faint pounding of dubstep drifted down from the navigation floor.

I strolled into the lounge, a wide open room lined with a few sofas, tables, and portholes. A bar on the far side of the room separated it from the kitchen. Behind it stood a noticeably muscular giant of a stallion with a white coat and short-cropped, blonde mane and tail.

“Morning, Cleaver,” I mumbled. I trotted up to the cook. Apparently the mares’ screaming hadn’t completely woken me up yet.

“Hrm? Ah, Kaptain! Good afternoon. Have been up for hours, listening to angry fillies argue.” He spoke with a heavily accented baritone, turning on the stove to heat a pot of what I assumed to be leftover breakfast. “Why have you slept so late?”

I shrugged, glancing out the window idly as I sat at the bar. “I was reading late last night. Some books are hard to put down.”

The sound of angry hooves announced the presence of one of the loud mares from the earlier argument. “That pegasus is impossible! She has no idea how to treat that machine!”

A white unicorn mare stomped her way into the lounge and flopped down on a couch. Her short fiery mane and tail looked more ruffled than usual, and I could feel her anger even from my position across the room.

“Cleaver, food!” she commanded.

Cleaver made a small grunt as he shuffled about his kitchen. “Little pony should calm head. Stormslider knows her job. She is best trained member of crew.”

“Best formally trained, maybe!” she shot back. “That machine is suffering because of her. She has no idea how to treat it!” She pulled a lighter out and lit it with a burst of magic, holding the tiny flame close.

I turned to face her. “Calm down, Ember. She has only the best intentions for our engine. She’s hardly going to break the one thing keeping us up here.”

“How can I be calm when she’s in there tormenting that machine?” Ember said heatedly. The engine revved up for a few brief moments, as if agreeing with her.

Cleaver served me a bowl of tomato and bread soup from the pot, and brought Ember a fluffy omelet.

“Eggs again? Really?” She sighed.

“Enjoy meal. Calm yourself. You are no good to ship in distress,” Cleaver said. He returned to his kitchen and the bottle of vodka on the counter, reaching down to take a quick sip. Ember grumbled something under her breath.

“Thanks, Cleaver. I’m going to go check things with Silver,” I said. He pushed a small plate of vegetables towards me, and I levitated it to my side before trotting back to the antechamber.

The faint pounding of the dubstep was dramatically louder once I reached the navigation floor. Despite being played from the other side of the door which led to the cockpit, the music seemed to fill the entire level with an audible fog, blurring my vision. My pilot enjoyed playing dubstep when he flew, and he played it loud.

One couldn’t truly appreciate the volume until they opened the door.

Despite years of experience to temper my ears, entering the cockpit remained an exercise in incredible willpower. The vibrations in the air were so intense that passing over the threshold was like physically penetrating a wall of bubble wrap.

The cockpit was a room that seemed designed to confuse anypony inside as quickly as possible. Various levers, chains, pulleys, and pedals were crammed into the small space with no discernible pattern. The walls and dashboard were decorated with switches and gauges so worn that any identifying colors they might have had were long faded, and any labels that may have indicated their purposes were gone as well. In the center of the room, sitting before the bubble of glass at the front of the ship, Silver Feather bobbed his head to the beat. His tall silver mane, dark orange coat, and long tail bobbed and swayed in perfect tandem with the music as he eyed the instruments before him.

With some quick magic, I turned off the stereo in the corner that was so busily dropping the bass. Silver jumped, his hooves losing their beat, and flicked his head towards me in such a way that the goggles he had been wearing flew up his forehead and lodged themselves comfortably in his mane.

“Oh, Dissy. Hey there.” He glanced at the stereo to ensure it was still there.

It should be noted that Dissy is not my name. Dissero is. It’s just a familiar he picked up from my parents. Normally I wouldn’t respond to it, but as a longtime foalhood friend, I let him slide.

“Morning, Silver. How are we doing?” I asked him. My ears were still ringing, but I was used to the sensation.

“You mean afternoon, right? S’all good, though… we seem to be losing some engine output. I presume our mechanically minded fillies were debating on the best course of action, yeah?” The pegasus grinned, leaning to one side to eye an abstractly placed gauge.

“Yeah. Stormslider won, I think.”

“As she should. It’s her job, after all. She does it well, despite the trouble. Mind bringin’ me a snack? I haven’t eaten since soup this morning, and sitting here staring at the walls is hard work.”

“Beat you to it,” I said, floating the plate I had brought to him. He grabbed it with a wing and tucked it neatly by his shoulder.

“Thank our fine chef for me.” He stuck his snout into the plate. As I left, he flicked his music back on with his tail.

I’ve always disliked moments like this…

The vast majority of my crew’s time was spent lounging. All we really had to do was fly, after all. We had an engineer, Stormslider, but all she ever had to do was fix the engine. Once it was in working condition, she wasn’t really needed unless a particular burst of speed was required. Bursts of speed aren’t really high in demand in the trading business, and I wasn’t trying to set a world record or anything like that. Ember worked on other myriad machines and devices, but she also had just a maintenance role unless she was tinkering with something in her free time.

Cleaver’s only real job was to cook and save us the hassle of arguing over who was the worst chef. When he wasn’t preparing some massive meal, he relaxed and drank his vodka. As for myself, I walked around and gave them orders, but if nobody had any jobs to do I had no orders to give. Even Silver Feather had told me that ninety percent of his job as a pilot is staring at gauges.

We were all in our usual positions. Ember was brooding over her lighter and some complex geometric puzzle in one corner, deep in thought. I lay on a couch next to a window, reading some historical fiction set in the Lunar Wars. Cleaver relaxed at the bar, lazily humming some Stalliongrad folk tune to himself as he sipped from his bottle.

Stormslider was sitting in the opposite corner from Ember. She had her eyes closed, with music playing loudly enough through her headphones to serve as entertainment for the whole room. She had deep blue fur, with an unkempt mane and tail made up of a mix of lighter blues and reds. The ruby pendant on her necklace swung back and force as she bobbed her head. Luckily she didn’t listen to annoying music.

What we really need is… some excitement.

I still fondly remembered the days of my venturesome foalhood. Silver Feather and I used to have wild journeys together, only some of which were imaginary. We fought pirates, explored strange new lands, and led the legions of the Princess into battle.

We had become airstallions in the hope of living those adventures for real, but they had always just been pipe dreams. Things didn’t go exactly as planned, either…

Now I was stuck behind a desk, smiling false smiles at falsely smiling faces in an attempt to negotiate an extra bit out of a deal. It was some consolation that I still got to travel Equestria with exotic goods from every province, but it still wasn’t the life I had hoped for as a colt.

Suddenly, an abnormal groan shook the ship. The normal easy swaying motion of a well-piloted airship abruptly transformed into a rough vibration.

Ember and Stormslider immediately perked up, putting away their respective forms of entertainment. I could see each of the rival mares racing to mentally figure out what had gone wrong, who could be blamed for it, and who was going to have the skill to fix it first and best.

“Oy, Dissy!”

I briskly rose off my seat, leaving the book where it had been lying between my hooves. I could finish reading later.

“What happened?” I asked, making my way into the cockpit. A slightly annoyed Silver Feather was busily tapping at a gauge and holding onto a half-turned wheel.

“Well, I can’t say for certain, but my expert opinion says that that piece of manure we welded onto the hull in Canterlot is falling off. It’s bucking up the ship’s aerodynamics. Get one of the mares to fix it, yeah?” he said. “Maybe I’ll take a nap or something. We’ll have to stay hovering till it’s fixed or the hull’s gonna get all ripped up.”

“Ah, horseapples,” I said. “I better go tell them before they kill eachother over who’s to blame.” I could already hear the beginnings of a fight brewing in the lounge. By the time I got downstairs, Ember was searching for the magnetic boots she used to traverse the hull, and both the mares were sporting goggles. When it comes to competition, they sure do dress fast…

Ember approached me expectantly. “Hey, Dissero, where are the mag-boots? I’m going out to check the hull.”

Stormslider stepped in. “She’s the one who put it on last time. I told her, ‘add extra reinforcement to the rear edge,’ but she wouldn’t do it. Let me handle it, I have wings anyways.” The pegasus slid her goggles over her eyes and made for the hatch in the main hallway of the ship, near the cargo bay.

Her fiery competitor jumped in the way. “Look, I told you the first time that extra reinforcement would’ve bucked with the ship and that it was gonna fall of no matter what, remember?” she explained. “Dissero, now would be a great time to show me the mag-boots.”

Silver Feather glided down the staircase. “Fillies, c’mon. Why don’t you both go?” He jabbed a hoof in Stormslider’s direction. “I’m sure that if you defer to our mechanic who’s here to fix the ship, your aid would be greatly appreciated.” The blue pegasus bristled, but said no more. He trotted past the mares, satisfied that the matter was settled.

“Try and be more assertive, yeah?” he whispered to me as he passed.

I let out a tired sigh. “Go on, then, you heard him.” Ember and Stormslider exchanged suspicious glares as they turned to the hatch.

In the kitchen, Cleaver found where his vodka had rolled off to during the shaking and let out a small exclamation of joy.

I stood in the cockpit eyeing the Manehattan skyline, silhouetted by Celestia’s sun as it set on the horizon. The city was situated on the Marissippi, which flowed all through Equestria, and also home to one of the few bridges on the river suitable for trade caravans by land. Furthermore, small airships docked there from several local settlements. It was an important stop on my routes, and not just because of the plentiful bits I made off the zapapple trade.

We soon reached the Manehattan Skydock: a tall, thick tower with several aerial piers sticking out on each level like a metallic porcupine, hanging over the nearby port. Beneath it, ponies were hard at work loading and unloading boats, transporting goods between warehouses, and trying to cut the perfect deal in their quest for coin.

With night approaching, we hardly had to wait before one of the few remaining pegasus guides flew up and directed us to an empty pier. Silver eased the ship into position, and more of the local pegasi flew close with ropes ready to moor us to the tower. He turned off his music, flicked his goggles up into his mane with a smooth head motion, and nodded. We were ready to go.

We headed down into the lounge, where the rest of the crew were waiting. Stormslider and Ember both had on their personal saddlebags, and Cleaver waited by the hatch with his vodka in hoof.

“It’s too late to do any trading,” I announced. “Silver and I are going to go renew my license. We’ll be back and locking the door at midnight.”

“I need to go pick some things up. I’ll find a club to hang out at for a few hours before I get back,” Stormslider said. I nodded. She had mentioned something earlier about replacement parts for the engine. She trotted outside.

“I will follow engineer. Perhaps will find trinket to buy as well.” Cleaver took another swig of his vodka and stepped outside. No doubt he thought a crate of vodka to keep him going another week would be the perfect trinket. How the hay is he always so sober?

Ember stood alone, hesitating momentarily as she debated her choices. She was clearly still angry with Stormslider, and I doubted she wanted to roam the crowded city all alone. She turned to me.

“Guess I’ll go with you two, then,” she said.

She followed me and SiIver out of the airship, and we walked across the thick metal pier to the central tower. I looked down on the city, orienting myself with my destination. It never paid to get lost in Manehattan.

I stopped before a small booth jutting out from the tower’s structure. A young, and by the looks of it extremely bored, clerk accepted my license and squinted at it. I felt myself tense as he clicked his pen out and made a scribble on a paper by his side. Yawning, he hoofed the license back and waved us on to the elevator.

After a short ride down to the surface, we emerged into the trade district of Manehattan. I wrinkled my nose as the smell of fish assaulted my nostrils, drifting off the boats in harbor and overpowering any other scent that dared to resist. Warehouses dominated this part of the city, with tired stallions pulling carts filled with goods in and out of them, rushing to complete their jobs before the sun set. A few well-dressed ponies made their ways around the carts, walking as fast as they could without losing the laid-back, friendly air they needed to cut another deal.

I led the way at a brisk pace. Silver Feather followed close behind and Ember brought up the rear, eyeing the road nervously whenever we passed a crowd. We soon put distance between us and the tower, and the traffic began to thin. The buildings became less colorful and more run-down, and the ponies we passed began to lose the shine in their coats.

The sky darkened as we slipped down a dim alleyway, stopping before a shady staircase. A heavy and imposing metal door awaited us at the bottom, spotlighted by the rusty little lamp that hung above it. I raised a hoof and knocked once. The metallic bang echoed up and down the alley as we waited.

The small peephole on the door slid open violently, revealing an annoyed pair of eyes. They glanced over me for a few seconds. They disappeared. A long, intricate series of clicks and bangs sounded from the other side of the door. It swung open slowly.

A heavy and imposing stallion stood on the other side. He didn’t seem very pleased by our presence. He waved us in with the air of a merciful god. As Ember began to cross the threshold, he stepped in her way.

“Who’s she?” he asked. He narrowed her eyes at her as if he had just spotted her kissing his daughter.

I turned. “She’s with me,” I said. Ember stood her ground, glaring at the stallion. Should’ve seen this coming. She hasn’t been here before.

The stallion eyed her suspiciously. He stepped aside, returning to the heavy and imposing pose he liked to take next to the door. Ember trotted inside defiantly, sticking her nose up as she passed him. He closed the door, turning his gaze to take in the rest of the room like it was a blight upon Equestria.

“Thanks, Bite,” Silver said. His comment was ignored with extreme prejudice.

With the conflict solved, I led the way forwards. The room was dim, with most of the light coming from the neon lights that blinked and flashed across the floor, matching the heavy bass beat that shook through it. Ponies gambled in every corner, loudly exclaiming at a fall of the dice or a turn of the cards. A group of stallions in business suits exchanged masked threats over a table as they eyed the dancing crowd that filled the far half of the room distastefully. A circular bar surrounded a series of raised platforms, each one holding a couple pretty mares dancing suggestively, much to the approval of the watching stallions below.

Silver led the way through the crowd, using his wingspan to break a path. Ember stayed close behind him, eyes down, flicking her lighter on and off furiously. We came up to a simple door on the far side of the room, where we were greeted by a pair of reproachful, rugged bouncers.

“We’re here to see Masque,” I said. The two stallions frowned down upon us from atop their muscular necks, opening the door and stepping aside like a pair of carefully sculpted glaciers.

I took the lead as we crossed the threshold, emerging into a simple hallway. The efficient lighting contrasted harshly with the darkness of the club, and only the bass leaking through the wall destroyed what could have been a peaceful silence.

Ember shook herself as the door shut, standing up straight and stepping away from Silver, who she had been practically hugging during the walk through the club. I walked down the hallway, past a door that was busily radiating a squeaky thumping, with my two crewmates behind me.

My ears twitched as I heard the sound of a scuffle further down the hall. Without warning, the drywall exploded outwards. The rubble was quickly followed by a wide-eyed pony who seemed just as surprised by his ejection as we were. Silver fluttered his wings, leaping back just in time to avoid impact.

I looked down awkwardly. The pony looked up painfully.

A tall, muscular stallion lumbered through the doorway, closing it behind him with surprising gentleness. Ignoring us, he stepped past the new hole in the wall, grabbed the groaning pony with a wing, and dragged him away.

“And don’t come back!” shouted a mare with one hoof out the door.

Her accent quickly identified her as a native of Prance, and her expertly coiffed green mane and neatly combed yellow coat hinted at an uncommonly acute sense of fashion. Two contrasting masks, one laughing and the other crying, served as her cutie mark.

Her eyes passed over us, and she immediately switched from angry to welcoming. “Ah, Dissero! What a pleasure to see you!” she said. She extended a hoof to sweep me into her room.

“Hello, Masque,” I said. I allowed myself to be pulled in.

Her apartment was, to say the least, colorful. Costumes, hats, and clothing with enough variety to rival the crowd at the Summer Sun Celebration were strewn all over. Not a single inch of floor was visible through the mess, and the walls weren’t much better off, with the only bare patches being the door and the freshly made hole. A rectangular shape I took to be a bed occupied one corner, buried underneath reds and yellows. Next to the bed, a hideous rainbow blanket was draped over what seemed to be a lamp, if the light filtering through it was to be trusted.

“So I presume you’re here for your new license, dearie?” she asked. She swaggered to the one remotely neat part of the room: a desk covered in little pieces of plastic, glue, scissors, and other crafting supplies.

“Yes.” I eyed a shade of blue that seemed to be developing life. “I won’t be staying long, though. It’s late.”

She smiled. “Yes, I’ve already got it done! It’s around here somewhere,” she sang as if finding small pieces of plastic in an organizational apocalypse was one of her favorite pastimes.

Then again, she probably does end up doing that a lot…

She began trotting around the room, sifting through the upper layer of fabrics. Ember slid up to my ear. “She doesn’t seem like she’d be good at… something like this,” she whispered.

Masquerade’s ears twitched as she turned to Ember, wearing a bright smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Is that so, dearie? I suppose you wouldn’t know. One doesn’t get much recognition as a master of disguise.” A dangerous undertone lay beneath the words, offering a silent threat before it slipped away.

“Why, back when I was still into thieving I once stole a dragon’s hoard by disguising myself as discarded tape! You can only imagine what –“ She suddenly tripped over a stuffed snake, landing headfirst into a giant chicken.

Ember stifled a giggle.

She bounced back to her hooves as if nothing had happened. “And then, I took the money from selling the loot and disguised my vacation home as a peacock! That dragon was searching for years and never found me! Oh! No… maybe? Nope!” She laughed, tossing a few ID cards aside to be lost to ponykind forever. Or at least until she had to find them again.

Ember looked up from the disturbing blue filly doll at her hooves. “You disguised a house as a peacock and yourself as tape? Is that even possible?”

“Of course it is, dear! You just have to start thinking as the box,” she said. “Ooh, I think I know where it is!” She climbed over a fallen showcase and picked up an envelope on the bed-shape, pulling it out from beneath an overturned cash register full of purple socks. “Here we go!”

I levitated the envelope to my side. “Thanks again, Masque.”

“Not a problem, dear! Why, if you had actually gotten a real license, I’d be out of my favorite customer!”

I grinned half-heartedly. “Heh, yeah. I’ll be back after I make some sales tomorrow to chat,” I said. Silver snatched the envelope from my magic and fished out a pilot’s license with his picture on it.

“That’ll be fine, Dissero. I can’t wait to tell you about this time last year I used a cup of tea as an –“ She was interrupted as a pile of ridiculous hats collapsed, burying her alive.

We retraced our steps out through the club. The bouncers frowned as we passed, expressing their divine disapproval at our existence.

Stepping out of the alley, we emerged into an open plaza, surrounded on all sides by rundown buildings and occupied by a pitiful attempt at a park. The few citizens on the streets moved past at a quick canter, eyed greedily by groups of rough-looking ponies huddled together in the moonlight. I nodded to Ember and Silver, briskly heading towards the skyport where ship and safety alike awaited.

Unfortunately, we were intercepted.

As we trotted down a narrow shortcut, a burly stallion stepped out of a side alley and blocked our path. The flutter of wings announced the arrival of two pegasi landing behind us. We were surrounded.

“Horseapples,” Silver hissed, flaring his wings. Ember pulled her lighter out and flicked the fire on. I took a step back, and we formed ourselves into a compact, defensive triangle.

“Hold it!” one of the pegasi called. We froze, each one of us glaring at one of them.

A much smaller pony, his horn barely visible in the dark, emerged from the shadows. He sported a dirty bowtie and old fedora, commanding an aura of respect despite his size. A greedy gleam shone in his eyes.

“Youse merchants?” he asked. I nodded. Hopefully all he’s looking for is bits…

“Mmm.” He looked me over. “I got some cargo I need shipped. Real quiet-like,” he said.

I see where this is going. I prepared myself to refuse. Silver slid his goggles down with a quick nod of his head. Ember’s hooves slid over the pavement.

“It’s good stuff. Need it brought to Harmony City. Why don’tcha be a lil’ neighborly and ship it for me, hrm?” the little unicorn sneered. He smiled with mock friendliness.

“We don’t smuggle,” Ember growled. The unicorn frowned.

“Yeh don’t smuggle, just use false licenses, eh? Strange…” He narrowed his eyes. “Wouldn’t want anypony getting’ wind a’ that, would we now? Doubt they’d hold up to heavy… scrutinization.”

I glared at him. Masque was good, but she couldn’t get my name on the list of licensed captains kept by the Royal Aerial Society. An anonymous tip would make things difficult, at the very least.

I weighed my options. We could probably take them. They only had one pony more than us, and the little unicorn didn’t look dangerous. Still, I wasn’t much of a fighter, and the big stallion in front of me looked tough. Celestia knows if that unicorn has any fighting spells…

“What kind of cargo are we talking about here?” I asked. I had some smuggling experience. One run wouldn’t hurt. If it was a commodity I knew, I could handle it without too much hassle and avoid the fight.

“That don’t matter to you, now. All youse gots to know is it’s light, small, and pays well. There’s a buyer at Harmony City who’ll pay nice, and da customs there won’t even stop you. Just sneak it outta here and don’t get caught on the way there,” he said.

Silver Feather stepped up to my side, bristling. “I dunno about this, Diss. It’s too easy. There’s gotta be a catch.”

I furrowed my brow, deep in thought. Ponies didn’t usually blackmail others to help them make a profit. Silver looked like he was ready to pounce on the big stallion; he had some experience with fighting. I tensed, preparing my words to refuse and my body to fight.

A shadow flew by, barely visible out of the corner of my eye. With a furtive glance up, I saw more pegasi on the rooftops, watching, at the ready in case I resisted. I had no choice.

“Fine, we’ll do it,” I said.

Silver flicked his goggles up, shooting an appalled look to me, while Ember continued to glare. The unicorn smirked confidently, nodding to the pegasi on the rooftops.

I figured we could get it over with quickly and cleanly. Besides, a little adventure never hurt anypony, right?

Author's Notes:

Yay! Rewrites are exciting! It means I get to make a new wave of snarky comments!
Y'know, I didn't realize it until I rewrote this chapter, but there is actually a Mass Effect reference in here. It's pretty obscure, but let's see who picks it up.