[This chapter will soon be changed to third person perspective once Nethelli stops being lazy. Until then, enjoy it as it is. You're one of the last people to see it like this.]

"I can't believe it worked! It's a real live human! I did it I did it I did it!"

You open your eyes for a split second, shutting them tightly as the light in the room nearly blinds you. It takes several minutes for you to adjust your vision, all the while the voice you heard earlier keeps squealing excitedly, tossing in the occasional "I did it!"

Lifting yourself off the floor, you come face to face with a seafoam green pony with golden eyes. Her entire appearance is in the same style as the cartoon you were watching moments ago. You reach out your hand awkwardly, touching her cheek. Shock and realization hit simultaneously - this is neither a hallucination nor a dream. How could this have happened? You're not exactly a rocket surgeon, but you're no fool either - this simply shouldn't be possible.

"Umm..." She shifts uncomfortably, your hand still firmly placed on her cheek. You pull your hand back quickly, staring intently down at it, flexing your fingers slightly. It was taking an incredible amount of self control to maintain any semblance of composure.

Looking up from your hand, you decide that you absolutely must confirm what you're seeing. "You're real, aren't you?"

The unicorn cocks her head to one side, as if the question was the most ridiculous thing she had ever heard. "Of course I'm real. Why wouldn't I be?"

Shivers run down your spine at her words. Not only is this real, but you know her. You've seen her countless times while watching your favorite show. Usually you find comfort in knowledge, but this particular occasion is unnerving.

"Heartstrings... or rather, Lyra. I'm right, aren't I?" Your words are calculated and meticulous. Tense. Your eyes are locked with hers, and you both appear uncomfortable.

The unicorn, clearly surprised by your knowledge of her, manages to maintain eye contact. "That is my name, but how did you know it?"

You can't think of a way to explain to her that she's a cartoon character. It would sound absolutely crazy. Possibly even hurtful. Better to err on the side of caution. "I'm not sure. I just... know. Not just you, either. Your roommate, most of the ponies around town... and yet I have no idea where I am, exactly."

Lyra seems to recoil a bit at how much you know, especially with no explanation of how you know, but she shakes it off quickly. "Since you already know my name, would you mind telling me yours?"

"It's Taylor," you reply succinctly. Instantly, her eyes are drawn to your backside. "Not that kind, and no, I don't have one," you add. Her eyes snap back to yours and she smiles awkwardly.

"Right, sorry, I'm just so used to... well, you know, right?" You nod at her question. "So, now that you're here, I really want to ask you a lot of questions." You give another reassuring nod to calm her nerves. "Sure."

I just woke up in a different WORLD and I'm the calm one?

She trots over to her desk, pulling out pages and pages of notes with the occasional book. By the time she finishes, the desk, chair, and floor are an utter mess. She begins grabbing pages at random, searching for something.

"Here it is!" she exclaims, quickly shrinking in embarrassment at her own outburst. "Right, so... humans, what do they eat?"

It's a fair question, if a bit odd to start with. "Most anything, really, barring obvious exceptions like tree bark or dirt. I can't really speak for the rest of my species, but I particularly enjoy steak and various pastas."

Lyra stares blankly for a moment. Of course she has no idea what you were talking about. "Okay, I'll get to steak in a moment. Pasta is what you get when you grind some kind of grain into a powder, like flour, mix it with water and sometimes eggs. That will give you a dough of sorts, and then you shape it into strings, flat sheets, tubes, or whatever else you can think of. It's almost always dried and sold that way. When you want some, you just boil it in water and then add whatever ingredients you prefer."

You begin to go into more detail about the different types, and Lyra hangs on every word, utterly enthralled by your explanation. She seems to be watching your hands as you speak. You assume it's because you tend to use a lot of hand movements in conversation, something that ponies can't really do. Occasionally, she takes notes, but they're almost entirely shorthand. You guess she's far more interested in hearing your story then recording it. It's flattering, actually.

"I'm not much of an artist, but I could try to draw a few of these if you'd like some visual aids." Before you can blink she's got a pencil and paper levitated inches from your face, and a massive smile on hers. "I'll take that as a yes," you say with a smirk, sketching away as you continue speaking.

"Now, what about that first thing you mentioned? Stick?" Her questioning gives you pause, realizing what you're about to tell her is likely some horrific taboo.

"Steak, and you might want to brace yourself for this one. I'm fairly certain you're not going to like it." you glance up at her from the paper you've been drawing on. She appears wary, but receptive.

"Okay, well... it's..." you trail off, aborting your first attempt to describe it.

This is going to be difficult.

"It's.... what?" she looks at you nervously. "You don't eat... ponies, right?"

You blink. "What? No. I mean, I've heard some people-"

Stop stop stop STOP! Do NOT finish that sentence!

"Just... no. I don't eat ponies." Lyra lets out a sigh of relief. "However, we do eat some animals."

Instantly, Lyra becomes tense again, and you sigh. "I'm just going to start listing animals. Stop me if it gets to be too much for you." She nods, still looking uncomfortable.

"Cows, chickens, pigs, fish, sheep, deer. Lots of people enjoy duck and turkey, especially during certain holidays. Things like clams, and oysters are common fare. I've known people to eat snake meat when it's around. Others, particularly eastern cultures enjoy octopus, squid, whale... sometimes dogs and cats."

Lyra looked horrified. Not surprising. I harbor the same general opinion. Something about imagining the family pet in one house as the main course in another is exceptionally unpleasant.

You've gone this far. May as well take that last step...

"Lastly... in a few cultures - and I mean very few - it's actually acceptable to eat other humans."

By this point, Lyra was looking ill. You feel guilty for exposing her to this, but sigh and decide to get it over with.

"Regarding your last question... in the interest of full disclosure - yes, some humans might eat ponies, given the opportunity. I want to assure you that I am not in that demographic. Even on the brink of starvation, I doubt very much that I would be capable of eating a pony, horse, or whatever. "

Besides, I've heard it's tough, greasy, and unpleasant.

This doesn't seem to put her at ease, and you can see her shaking a bit. Why wouldn't she be? You basically just informed her that your people are ravenous monsters that eat anything too slow or dumb to get away.

"It's not like we're evil, you know." you say indignantly - as if you have anything to be indignant about. "We don't go around eating random creatures for fun. Besides, some of my species actually choose not to eat any meat at all."

You're not sure if it's your tone or your choice of words, but it seems to make her feel a little better. "It's probably for the best to leave this topic for now."

"Y-yeah, I think you're right," she begins, collecting her thoughts, "um... oh, I know. You walk on two legs. How does that work? How can you keep your balance so easily?"

Another question that seemed odd, but you suppose that for Lyra, this is like having her own personal guide to a different world. It's understandable that she would want to know everything about everything, even the mundane.

"Well, it's not exactly an easy process. Most of us take a long time to learn to do it properly, so our parents start teaching us pretty early, well before we can talk. Even five or six years after we've taken our first steps, a young human is still pretty uncoordinated, but that applies to most things involving young children."

Lyra's expression of wonder comes back faster than expected. You return to your slightly exaggerated hand motions when speaking, because she seems to enjoy that. When you're done discussing what you actually know of the mechanics of walking on two legs, Lyra asks a few more questions, many of which you can really only speculate on the answer. Your knowledge of human biology is rudimentary, so she'll just have to accept what you can offer.

The next topic is methods of travel, something you're a little more knowledgeable about, so you jump right into cars, planes, boats, and the like. She appears almost offended when you explain that horses are still commonly kept as a means of transportation, but remains silent.

Several minutes in to your explanation, you hear a voice from downstairs. "Lyra! I'm home! Where are you?"

"Oh no! That's Bon Bon! If she sees you here, she'll... I don't know what she'll do!" Lyra flies into a panic. You scan the room, but there aren't any good hiding places to be found. Pony homes are a bit smaller than your typical human house after all, as is everything inside. Where hiding under a bed would be no challenge in his own world, here you would just look absurd.

The sound of hoofsteps coming up the stairs resonates in the room. You only have seconds to react before your cover is blown. Without anywhere to hide properly, you press yourself against the wall near the door, hoping that the other pony won't happen to look to the left and see you.

The door swung open, and Bon Bon was greeted by a rather suspicious scene. Papers filled with notes and sketches strewn about. A few old books in a disorderly pile. Most of all, Lyra herself - wide eyed and putting on an obviously forced smile.

The other pony narrowed her eyes at Lyra. "I heard a voice up here. Who were you talking to?"

"Nobo- er... nopony! Nopony at all! Just me here, talking to myself! Reading out loud!"

Bon Bon continues to pierce Lyra with her stare, obviously not buying it. "You're lying, Lyra. I know I heard something, so just tell me who's up here. It's no big deal if you had a stallion over. In fact, it would be a welcome change from all of your human nonsen-"

The loud creak of a wooden board echoed in the room and both Lyra and Bon Bon turned in unison toward you.

You just HAD to shift your weight a little more, didn't you?

It was little more than a second or two before anything happened, but it felt like an eternity. Bon Bon recognized the form, having seen Lyra's sketches of what humans look like. The shock of seeing one in the flesh was too much.

Bon Bon fainted, collapsing to the floor with a loud thud.

At least this time it wasn't you.