There was an explosion of mashed potato, and something small and purple was thrown violently through the air. It punched clean through the side of a building, sending dust and rubble everywhere; the latest hole in a series of holes between the victim and her aggressor.

“Get away from her!” yelled a gangly, bipedal purple dragon, brandishing a glowing sword that matched his silvered armor. He leapt forward, only for his target to wave a mismatched paw at him. The dragon hit the ground hard, limbs locked solid by armor that had mysteriously transmuted into a shell of diamond.

“Spike!” a voice weakly called out in alarm, from the middle of the crater where she’d landed. A shaky purple hoof stepped out of the crater, and ponies rushed forward to aid the unicorn. She dismissed them with a shake of the head, and strode forward, displaying strength and confidence, despite having been thrown through six walls in as many minutes.

“Oh ho, Twilight Sparkle,” Discord nodded approvingly, stepping over Spike’s crystal-clad form. “Not bad for a seventy-nine-year-old. Can’t say the same for little spikey-wikey, here,” he chuckled, before his eyes hardened. “Shining Armor chose his replacement poorly, I feel. Great choice with regards to longevity, but a terrible choice if, you know, you want things protected.”

“Why can’t you just stay locked away?” Twilight asked, exasperatedly.

“Because, dearest Twilight,” Discord simpered, vanishing like a mirage and materializing right behind her, “I’m chaos. I can’t just do what everypony wants, that’d be incredibly OOC of me, wouldn’t it?”

There was a second explosion, this time of doves, and Twilight flew away again; this time, she flew a very short distance, a magenta dome surrounding her as she skidded to a halt on the streets of Ponyville.

Discord clicked his teeth in surprise, stepping out into the street, under the cotton-candy-laced skies that had heralded his arrival. “You’ve clearly practiced since last we met. Able to counter my magic almost as fast as it manifests...” Discord smiled. “Just a shame it’s only boring old magic.”

There was a rumble of hooves, and Twilight looked to the side to see a stampede of abnormally-long-legged rabbits headed her way. She reacted in an instant, casting a spell on her hooves and bouncing high up into the sky... where a winged buffalo smashed into her back and slammed her back down to earth.

Twilight hit the ground with a gasp and bounced out of a shallow crater as she skidded to a halt at Discord’s feet. She coughed and spat blood onto the pavement as she staggered to her hooves. Still standing, but certainly not with the strength she’d shown just a few seconds ago. The pair were starting to become surrounded by a large ring of ponies, who muttered murderously at Discord and with concern for the oldest and last surviving Element of Harmony.

“You’re not going to win, Discord,” Twilight coughed. “You’re going back into the statue. And then you’re going to the sun. I’ll see it happen, if it’s the last thing I do. I’m sick and tired of you messing with ponies’ lives.”

“I think... not,” Discord said, leaning over and patting Twilight on the head as condescendingly as possible. “You see, I thought this out. I did some reading on the Elements of Harmony while I was out.” Discord leaned back, and pulled a chalkboard out of nowhere, donning thick-rimmed glasses as he cleared his throat. “Let me show you with a diagram.”

Discord leaned over, and with a claw, scratched a picture into the chalkboard, the screeching causing everypony apart from Twilight to cringe in pain. When he drew back, there were a number of pictures and arrows.

“Here’s me,” he explained, pointing to a ludicrously muscular minotaur-esque figure with Discord’s head on top. “And here is you,” he added, pointing to a crudely drawn picture of a pony that was little more than a pair of ovals with legs and lines to symbolize limbs. “You look pretty dumb in this picture. Step it up, Sparkle-Sempai.”

“Get on with it,” Twilight growled.

“Anyway,” Discord bent over backwards, forming a short spiral as he twisted and regained his footing. “You and your dumb little friends - that’s them in that corner there, I just drew gravestones, they’re easier to draw than actual skeleton ponies - need all six Elements of Harmony and the ponies to carry them, in order to put me where you think I belong.” Discord looked at Twilight over the top of his glasses. “I disagree with the whole statue-thing, by the way, but for the sake of impatial debate, let’s move past how you locked me in stone for sixty years.”

“What’s your point?” Twilight countered.

“My point?” Discord rocked back and groaned. “Don’t you get it, my little mortal pony? Didn’t we go over this last time, when I went and showed your dumb little friends how flimsy the world really was? You need all six bearers. You can have all the jewelry you like,” Discord held up a draconic claw bedecked with enough gold to sink a ship, “But it doesn’t mean anything if five of the six elements of harmony are dead!” Discord pointed to the tombstones. “Go on, tell me I’m wrong, that your friends’ deaths of natural causes were all faked to lure evil beings like me into a false sense of security.”

“I...” Twilight swallowed as she recalled her friends. They’d all gone on ahead of her, not long ago, actually. “You’re not wrong.”

“Aaaand,” Discord gestured grandly, “New bearers for the Elements can’t be found until all the old ones are dead! You’re not dead! So, Twilight,” Discord leaned in close, “Guess what that means for you?”

“You’re going to kill me?” Twilight asked.

“Aaaugh, again with the expected actions,” Discord whined. “No, you silly pony. I’m going to make sure you never, ever die.”

Twilight blinked in surprise.

“See,” Discord continued. “If you never die, then the Elements of Harmony can never be used against me, because you’re not dead! Do you see how this works?”

“Oh, I see how you think that’s going to work, alright,” Twilight muttered. “But did you miss the part where I’m a seventy-nine-year-old pony? How are you going to stop me dying of old age?”

“Dearest Twilight,” Discord ran a claw under her jaw, tipping her head up to look him in the face as he leaned in close, the smell of ham and rum thick on his breath. “Did you know that ponies turned into statues never truly die?”

Twilight’s breath caught in her throat. “No!”

“YES!” Discord crowed, dancing around in circles. “You are going to get stoned so hard, and you’ll live forever, and I’ll sit on my throne as Equestria’s rightful King for the rest of time because nopony can pick up the Elements of Harmony while you live! It’s a foolproof plan!”

“Wait,” Twilight smiled. “You’ve got a plan? I thought Chaos didn’t do “plans”.”

“No-o,” Discord shook his head slowly. “Chaos does what you don’t expect. And you expected me to just come at you with no plan and a view to just throwing magic around until I turned purple like you! Well, we ain’t playing that game, buster, no sir!” Discord gargled up a wad of spit and fired it into a nearby wall, which deformed under the negligible pressure to reveal it was actually made of putty.

Twilight closed her eyes, and sighed. “You still won’t win.”

“Well,” Discord said, tapping his chin before flicking Twilight in the snout with a claw. “Let’s see about that. Proof in the pudding, and all.”

Twilight felt a heavy weight in her legs, and looked down to see them turning to stone; it wasn’t the first time this had ever happened, but she feared it would be the last.

And if she became stone, Equestria was doomed. She calmed herself down, and reached out with her mind for six pinpoints of light sitting in a box, so very far away. Any other item would be out of her reach, but these... they were special.

With six flashes of light, the Elements of Harmony materialized in the air. Twilight’s tiara fell onto the top of her head as the stone slowly crept up her neck, and pulsed. With a sound like fracturing ice, the stone’s advance stopped, just shy of Twilight’s throat.

Discord watched the other five elements appear where necks would undoubtedly have been, had anypony been standing with Twilight, and fall to the ground with a wet clink as nothing stood there.

He laughed once, before sighing. “Oh, I’m a terrible draconeqqus,” he muttered, before brightening and laughing again. “But it was so hilariously pathetic, like you forgot that your friends are dead! How could I not laugh?”

Twilight ignored him, reaching into the Elements of Harmony for a solution, any solution. She reached out with all of her heart, tapping on all the numerous facets of the power of Harmony.

One facet tapped back.

Twilight opened her eyes, smiling once more, every ounce of her age showing in this final gambit.

“My friends aren’t dead, Discord.”

Discord stopped laughing and frowned at her. “Oh, come on. Have I driven you mad so easily?”

“Not mad,” Twilight corrected. “I’m just saying you’re wrong.”

“Alright,” Discord frowned. “Let’s just clear this up. Your friends are dead.” He reached down to the cobblestones, and with a grinding of soil and stone, pulled a battered coffin out of the earth, the door flopping open to reveal a pegasus skeleton standing upright in the confined vessel.

“Rainbow Dash,” Discord announced. “Dead!” Discord pulled a mallet out from behind his back, and with no hesitation, smashed it into the top of the coffin, pulverizing it. Discord reached down to the mess of bones and wood, and like a macabre magician, pulled another coffin up. “Rarity! Dead as disco, darling!” Another smash, another coffin was produced. “Honest Applejack! As a doornail!” Smash. Drag. “Fluttershy! Knock knock! Who’s there? DEAD.” Smash. Drag. “Pinkie Pie!” Discord actually paused. “You know, we could have been great together. You know, if she didn’t marry that good-for-nothing sack of horseapples you and everypony else called a husband, and I didn’t mind being married to a mortal. Oh well.” Discord pulverized the coffin with a total lack of remorse. “Deeead.”

A tear trickled down Twilight’s face as she watched the final resting places of her friends desecrated so, but remained resolute.

“Haven’t you ever heard the saying, Discord?” Twilight asked. “They say a pony’s never truly dead as long as they live on in the hearts and minds of those they loved.”

Twilight closed her eyes, and the tiara atop her head pulsed once more with light as she called out to the void beyond. She heard Discord gasp, and a scrape of metal as jewellery left the ground.

She opened her eyes, and smiled warmly as her five best friends smiled back at her. Slightly translucent, they didn't look like they'd aged a day since she’d first met them, the necklaces that still bore their cutie marks hanging around necks that didn’t exist.

“Come on, Twi,” Applejack said, going to tug the brim of her hat and smiling when she realized that it wasn’t there. “We need you to make this work.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t work if none of us are in formation,” Rainbow Dash agreed. “And hay, I just don’t have it in me to call it, that always was your thing.”

“Come on, Twilight,” Rarity added. “Now’s not the time for cold hooves. Step up, would you?”

Twilight chuckled, and stepped forward; the stone that held her crumbled like cheap chalk, falling away to reveal a body that looked far younger than it really was.

“Formation! Now!”

Like clockwork, everypony leapt to take up places just behind Twilight, and the Element of Magic felt a strong breeze blow past, invigorating her and infusing weary limbs with strength she hadn’t felt in years.

“Um,” Fluttershy looked around. “Where’s Pinkie?”

“Over here!” Pinkie called out, voice muffled. The Elements looked around to see Pinkie’s ghost snout-first in a chocolate cake, making frankly unlady-like noises as she snorted and scarfed her way through the confection, shovelling cake into her mouth as fast as she could.

“Pinkie!” Twilight called out, a twinge in her heart as she remembered how much she missed Pinkie being Pinkie. “We’re in the middle of something, remember?”

“I know, I know!” Pinkie swallowed the last of the cake, and licked her hoof, before shooting back over to the group and licking her lips. “Oh Celestia, that’s good. Ghost-cake just ain’t the same. Now, where was I? Oh yeah!” Pinkie adopted a low posture and growled. “If you can’t slam with the best, you’d better jam with the rest, Discord!” Pinkie reared up and pounded one hoof into the other. “Prepare to get dunked!”

“This isn’t happening,” Discord muttered. “You’re dead. All of you. I made sure of it, pulled strings so you couldn’t survive. This isn’t possible!”

“We got better,” Applejack remarked snidely.

Twilight’s eyes went white with magical power, and the ground began to shake as the six rose into the air, borne aloft by their Elements. The glowing reached a crescendo, and the rainbow beam that was harmony shot into the sky like a lance, a beacon of hope to everypony in Ponyville.

“Hear that, Discord?” Twilight yelled over the roaring around her.

“Hear what?” Discord yelled back, struggling to move his feet and sweating as they refused to be moved.

“That’s the will of an entire town!” Twilight yelled, smiling. “The power of sixty years’ worth of friendships! Can’t you feel it? Me dying or not dying wouldn’t change anything! As long as Ponyville stands, you’re never going to win! Not ever!”

The rainbow beam arced over, and gracefully swan-dived like a meteor back to earth. Discord watched it draw ever closer, eyes filled with the rainbow-hued, stone-filled vision of his future.

“Noooo!” Discord yelled, reaching out with a claw for Twilight. “May you and your accursed friends rot in Tartarus, Sparkle!”

The light reached blinding levels, and ponies averted their eyes.

======

Celestia glared at the newly-imprisoned Discord, eye-to-eye, and sighed.

“You just had to push it, didn’t you?” she whispered. “But I can’t let something like this happen again, you’ve sealed your own fate.”

The skies were once again clear, and thanks to Discord’s focused attempt at eliminating the Elements of Harmony, what little damage he’d done to Equestria had been fixed with ease. A fresh sun shone down over the town of Ponyville, and birds chirped in the sky.

The statue of Discord glowed with sunlight, and in a blink, vanished. Luna stared where Discord had once stood, and looked to Celestia.

“Where did you imprison him this time?” she asked.

Celestia pointed skywards with a hoof. “The sun. Dead centre. He can stay there, for all I care. He’s never going to change, I see that, now.”

Luna nodded, and turned to the small crowd that had formed around them. They parted like water, making a path from the princesses to where Twilight Sparkle lay on a stretcher, covered with a simple, white blanket, guarded by her only surviving family, Spike.

Celestia approached the stretcher, and Spike stood up straight, throwing a brisk salute. Celestia nodded.

“At ease, Spike. This is no time for formality.”

Twilight Sparkle didn’t say anything, the elderly unicorn just staring into the sky with glassy eyes. Celestia looked down at her hooves, and a single tear fell from her eye. It was always hard seeing close friends and personal students die, no matter how often it happened.

“And so passes the last Element of Harmony,” Luna murmured, eyeing a nearby cart. Resting on the cart were six stone spheres, each one carved fresh with the cutie mark of the last pony to bear each one. “Should I start looking for the new Bearers?”

Celestia smiled, and shook her head slowly. Luna always was the one who liked to get down to business first and grieve later. Always the practical one.

“No, Luna,” she said, slowly lowering herself to her knees next to Twilight’s body, and closing Twilight’s eyes for the last time as she noted the contented smile on Twilight’s wrinkled snout. She was with her friends now, and nothing could ever separate them again.

“I think that can wait until tomorrow, don’t you?”