Chapter 13: Regression

The next few days had been very kind to our Lunar Princess or ‘Moonrise’ as she was known around her new companion, Seafire. She had gone back to the club and various other places to meet up with him during the night and sometimes during the day when nothing particularly exciting was planned for the day with her friends. They weren’t ‘together’ but you could technically say that the two of them were testing the waters; and so far those waters seemed to be of perfect temperature. She had not introduced him to her friends yet for obvious reasons… she would need to divulge her name first and she refused to dig herself into a larger hole than she already was in as a result. She had been seeing him for a few days and nothing bad has happened... quite the opposite actually. Her friends had even noticed a change in her demeanor. Celestia had even had her suspicions but found it nice that Luna was opening up even more to something of this magnitude, so she decided not to give her hell for it. As of right now, it was currently four days after the first meeting at around midnight. The two were strolling, arms linked in a classy fashion, in one of Ponyville’s many parks. Luna had done well in making sure that the night sky was extra beautiful tonight. Ultimately though, this would prove to work against her in some fashion.

“My word! The midnight sky is absolutely spectacular!” Seafire said with great excitement. Apparently he loved the night, making Luna blush and giggle a bit.

“Indeed it is. I thoroughly enjoy the nights around here,” ‘Moonrise’ added with a smile.

“It’s almost as if Luna herself is catering to us,” Searise added, forcing Luna to choke a bit on her words.

“So it would seem, right?” Luna said with a chuckle.

“I haven’t gotten the pleasure, but it seems Luna has done great work around Ponyville as she is residing here temporarily. I hear nothing but great things. Have you met her, Moonrise?” Seafire asked, looking towards her as they strolled along.

“Well, the gig’s up. This is as good of a cue as I’ll probably ever get,” Luna thought.

“Well, even if I wanted to, I feel meeting her would be nigh impossible,” she said, still looking straight.

“Oh? What makes you say that?” Seafire asked inquisitively.

“Because she’s walking beside you right now…” Luna said very meekly. It took a couple of seconds for Seafire to register those words in his head, and he slowly turned towards her in disbelief. Her looking right back at him and the unsaid words of her gaze told him that she was indeed telling the truth. For added effect, she returned the ‘free-flow’ aspect of her hair and conjured her tiara. He undid his arm to turn fully towards her.

“You’re… Princess Luna?” Seafire asked curiously. Luna merely nodded shyly. She was able to detect another emotion in his voice but couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

“Why… why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I was afraid… that’s why,” Luna responded. She had to admit that was the worst response she could have given.

“Afraid of what?” Seafire began, staying true to his nature and not raising his voice. “Oh… I understand,” he said dejectedly. Luna looked at him in a way that told him to continue.

“I can understand the first meeting at the club… maybe you didn’t want it to be known that you were there… but afterwards… why didn’t you tell me?” he asked.

“Be-Because I was afraid that if you knew who I was, that… not that you’d treat me badly but that your treatment of me wouldn’t be genuine… like almost a sense of obligation. I wanted it to be true!” Luna said in a faster tone, seemingly getting desperate.

“So, you didn’t trust me?” he asked in a somber tone. Luna was now able to place the emotion: hurt.

“Reverse our positions… at first, would you trust me?” Luna asked. Seafire said nothing, allowing Luna to continue.

“When people knew who I was, especially men, none of them were genuine. They felt I’d deal them physical harm if they didn’t treat me perfectly, so it was obligatory for them! Do you know how that feels?” Luna asked.

“I can't know. But is it right to assume that others will do the exact same thing?” Seafire asked. Luna couldn’t answer that. The fact of the matter was that both of them were right simultaneously. Luna’s assumption due to past experiences cannot necessarily be helped, but then again the act of assuming that he’d be the same is, in its own right, insulting. For Seafire, he’s right in pointing out that it’s rude to group everyone together, but to be irritated at that would be insensitive, due to what Luna has been through. It was a lose-lose situation for the both of them, in all honesty. Seafire didn’t know what to think… neither did Luna. The conflicting thoughts were overwhelming.

“Maybe we should call it a night…” Luna suggested.

“Yeah… it’s getting late. Let’s go,” Seafire agreed. They walked in silence as he escorted her back to Twilight’s house… something he’d done for the past few days when they’d part ways, albeit without silence. No contact was made by either of them as well. Eventually the two of them arrived at the treehouse. Luna turned to face him.

“Thank you again… and for taking me home…” she said uneasily. Despite the turmoil, Seafire remained true to his morals as a gentleman through and through.

“Yes… of course,” he said, not making as good of eye contact. Luna could still sense the troubled feelings from him.

“I’m sorry Seafire… truly I am… I just. Ugh. I…” Luna couldn’t find the words, she was slowly losing it.

“It’s fine, Luna,” Seafire said, ending her fumbling for words with a somewhat easy gaze. Then, Luna asked the question that had been plaguing her since this whole ordeal began:

“Will I see you again?” Seafire fixed his coat and began to speak:

“Possibly… I need to think for a little while,” he said meekly. There was great truth in that, for he really didn’t know how he should feel. The average person would say “so she didn’t give you her real name… big whoop!” But when put into the eyes of one who emphasizes trust and builds the foundation of a potential relationship on that, it could cause complete emotional chaos. Seafire had not stated his words out of malice, but out of hurt. He did not break anything off, nor form anything new. His words were neutral and sincere. However, those words are very prone to misinterpretation and with good reason. Luna, although more open with her feelings and in general, was still very much pessimistic… so she naturally assumed the worst.

“Goodnight, Luna,” he said while nodding respectfully before she did the same and entered into the house. Once she closed the door, Seafire sighed and proceeded to walk home with his head hung a little low… many thoughts on his mind. He had to look deeply through her own eyes as to why she would do such a thing. Maybe a day or two of thinking would set his mind straight and he could make an informed decision. Until then, it was best to avoid further turmoil for a short while.

Luna lost a small grasp of reality when she closed the door. She believed that this was her doing… her failure to see the consequences of such a simple “omission of information.” Her rational side was attempting to battle her emotional side inside of her as she stood in the dark common room, staring at nothing.

Luna… it’s okay… everything will be okay…

No… NO… don’t… do NOT cry…

Luna! Don’t you cry!

Don’t you fucking cry!

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck!

And then the tears flowed softly… then the sniffles… and then the quiet sobs. She trudged to her room and shut the door, locking it as well. Luna then formed a magic barrier over the room itself to negate any foreign magic, as well as shutting off her mental connections to Twilight and Celestia. She merely sat on her bed, head hung over her lap, and let the emotions spill out. Eventually, she cried herself to sleep.

Twilight knew something was up immediately when Luna didn’t emerge from her room at all. It was noon and she figured that she was sleeping in, but she never slept in this late. Twilight grew concerned and knocked on the door.

“Luna? Are you in there?”

“Yes? Is something up, Twilight?” Luna asked completely dejected and low.

“I could ask you the same thing…” Twilight said. Luna paused before she answered.

“I’m fine, Twilight. Please leave me alone for now,” Luna responded.

“You’re obviously not fine if you used those two clauses in the same sentence. Do I need to contact Celestia?” Luna didn’t answer that. The last thing she wanted to do was face her sister for some reason.

“That’s it I’m contacting Celestia. We’ve come this far and I’m not having you regress,” Twilight said as she opened the mental connection with Celestia.

“Celestia?”

“Twilight? Have you spoken with Luna? She turned off her mental connection…” Celestia responded immediately .

“That’s the problem. Something happened and Luna is refusing to come out of her room. I can tell she’s been crying. I think you need to come here, Princess,” Twilight reasoned. Celestia agreed.

“One moment,” Celestia said before she teleported right next to Twilight.

Celestia then put her ear to the door and sensed her younger sister’s presence inside. Attempting to teleport, she vanished into a white light before being thrown out in another white light, hitting the floor hard.

“Ugh… bitch put up a magical barrier,” Celestia said, rubbing her head, before knocking on the door.

“Luna? What the hell happened?”

“Fuck off. That’s what happened.”

“Luna, I’m not playing one of my games here, what the hell happened? Let me in!” Celestia nearly demanded. On the other side of the door, Luna was looking at herself in the reflection. Tear marks were evident on her face and her eyes were blood-shot. Her attire, however, was a topic for discussion. She was currently dressed in her old military uniform: Black slacks with a black coat with a navy blue sash and a black officer’s cap that held the insignia of Captain. You see, four years in Canterlot’s Royal Guard (a division of the military itself) had Luna graduating with that rank… a rank in which she could easily reinstate any time she wanted to, should she decide to enlist again. Graduation with such honors was one of the only highlights in her life that she was genuinely proud of herself for, so whenever she felt low, for whatever reason, she always wore her uniform, reminding her of her accomplishments… restoring a small shred of her confidence in herself. Luna eventually conceded and allowed Celestia to enter. She magically unlocked the door and she entered.

“Really… you’re wearing that?”

“Is this a consolation or an inquiry?” Luna asked in a flat tone.

“Save it, Luna. Now tell me what happened…”