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I Am Not the Actor

by cleverpun

Chapter 1: 1. This Can't Be the Scene

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1. This Can’t Be the Scene

BY: cleverpun

Moments after the sneeze, Twilight Sparkle lowered her horn and cast the spell. The flash of white and purple lit up the entire room. The blinding light faded very slowly, lingering far longer than any of the others. Eventually it receded, and as everypony lowered their hooves and opened their eyes, there was only a single pink pony sitting on the floor. She was still staring intently at the painted wall.

Twilight let out a deep sigh and walked towards her. “Pinkie, you can look away now.”

Pinkie blinked slowly. “I passed?” She rubbed a hoof against her forehead.

The other five had started to approach as well, and a small half-circle had formed around the pink earth pony.

Twilight smiled. “You passed. You’re the only Pinkie who kept staring at the wall.”

A small smile crept onto Pinkie’s face. “I knew I’d win! There’s no way I could lose something that important!”

“I knew you'd be up to the challenge.”

“So my prize is I get to stay, right?”

Twilight froze. “What?”

Rarity and Fluttershy exchanged a glance. Another passed between Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Spike looked up at Twilight, but she was still staring at Pinkie.

Pinkie’s smile widened. “That’s what you said right? Whoever wins gets to stay, and I won!”

“No…” Twilight’s word was barely a whisper, but the room was so quiet everypony heard it regardless.

“Yes!” Pinkie bounced up. “I remember! I heard you say it! You know, that was pretty fun now that it’s all over!” She had started hopping up and down. “Ooh, what should we do next? Something fun?”

“Twilight?” Applejack whispered.

Twilight took a few steps back. Everypony but Pinkie was staring at her now. “No…it couldn’t…” Her eyes flicked to the window and back to Pinkie.

“Twilight?” Fluttershy’s voice wavered a bit.

“Sugarcube?”

Twilight’s eyes darted around, landing everywhere except on her friends. She started breathing faster. She froze again. Her horn started glowing, she screwed her eyes shut and grunted as the spell shot out of her horn in a brief burst of purple light.

She was still for a few seconds. Her breathing evened out and her horn continued to glow brightly. Fluttershy and Rarity took a few steps towards her, when suddenly her eyes snapped open and she fell backward onto her rump.

She shakily stood up, then jabbed a hoof at Pinkie. “You. Come with me.”

“Are we gonna do something fun?”

“No.”


The lights in the conference room flickered for a moment. Pinkie shifted in her chair.

Twilight stared intensely at Pinkie. “How did you do it?” The question was icy, but angry. Twilight’s voice was low, but clear.

“I dunno.” Pinkie shrugged.

“You did something! Tell me!” Twilight finally let her voice rise. It made her feel better, if only slightly.

Pinkie winced. “I really don’t know. The other Pinkie just told me to have fun and act like her, so I did. She watched paint dry, so I did too. And it was a game, and games are fun, and I wanted to win. And I don’t really know how else to say it.”

Twilight slammed her hooves on the desk between them and leaned forward. “It can’t be that simple! There’s no way some clone outdid the real Pinkie Pie!” The conference desk wobbled and rattled slightly from her blow.

Pinkie recoiled again. “Twilight, you’re scaring me…”

Twilight's posture stiffened at the mention of her name. She leaned further over the desk.

Applejack put a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder, gently guiding her back to her chair. “Calm down, sugarcube. I know you’re upset about what happened to Pinkie Pie, but gettin’ angry won’t solve anything.”

“What else do you expect me to do?”

Pinkie scratched her head. “What’s there to get angry at, Twilight? I won the game, so I’m Pinkie Pie now. That’s how it works, right?”

Twilight finally lost what little control she had and burst out of her chair towards the clone. Magic would’ve been faster. Fast enough that Dash and Applejack wouldn’t have been able to tackle her. She knew that, of course.

Pinkie turned to the white unicorn next to her.

“Uhm, Rarity? Why is Twilight so upset? She didn’t lose the game, right? She was just the judge. Judges don’t win or lose, they just watch everyone else have fun. I don’t…”

The sound of Twilight crying interrupted Pinkie’s sentence.

“Why is she crying?”

“Because…Pinkie…” Rarity paused, “you may have been playing the ‘game,’ but the rest of us lost something because of the result.”

“Oh, were you betting something? I hear gambling is pretty fun! What did you lose?”

“The real Pinkie Pie.”

Pinkie smiled, innocently and sincerely. “Oh don’t be silly, Rarity! I’m right here! I won it fair and square! Pinkie told me to be like her, and I was so much like her I won! I must’ve done a good job, right? And now we can have loads of fun and throw parties and whatever else Pinkie—I mean, I used to…! Why is everypony crying?”

Next Chapter: 2. I Can See That This Is Me Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 32 Minutes
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