Chapter 1: hoe-ly shit

    "You need to drive FASTER!!" James yelled in my ear as he turned to look out the back window. "FUCK, THEY ARE STILL COMING!"

    "YOUR NOT HELPING!!" I yelled back as my eyes locked on the roads ahead.

I smash my foot against the gas petal as we sped down a neighbourhood road smashing into trash cans and rotting corpses. Don't worry about the car it was decked out. This car was a diesel truck, was fairly low to the ground and had a snow plow on it. It’s bed had a shit ton of ammo, food, water, guns and other homely needs (clothes, camping supplies, ETC..) which was all safely protected by two large tarps.

    *SPLAT**CRUNCH* Blood splattered all over the front window as well as the side.

"DAMN! That.Is.Nasty" I turned on the window wipers.

    "Okay this is getting us nowhere fast and we are running out of gas!" I said, scared shitless and slightly annoyed.

    "Well… we could try some frags..." Chris said, finally piping up from the back seat.

    "Okay, we only have one case of those… plus a few from the dead military units. That in total is like… what… 12?" I said glancing back to see him and the small box of frags.

    He was 6 feet tall and was muscular from all the heavy lifting we always did. He was also covered head to toe in hockey equipment. He had A large machete next to him as his weapon. Under the helmet he wore a bandana covering most of his face, and his eyes were covered by a pair of sun glasses.

    "I agree with deck on this one… we shouldn't waste those." James agreed, looking at me to emphasize his point.

    (Yes, I know my nickname is strange, my real name is Deckard.)

    I also looked at him for a moment to give a nod of thanks.

     He was 6-foot-2 and quite muscular. He was wearing something along the lines of a juggernaut, but a lot less bulky. Every part of his body was covered in plastic sports wear, His face was covered in a welders mask and he carried a 16 pound sledgehammer as his weapon of choice.

    I was the quick mover of the group. I was the tallest of the group topping out at 6-foot-5. Like my friends I was muscular but, I had a runner's legs. I wore a paintball mask with a bandana over it and a jump suit with snug boots and gloves. While my friends use hammers and machetes, I stick with tradition. I carry a metal baseball bat. Cracks skulls and never gets stuck.

    Although I probably should have kept my eyes on the road because as soon as I turned back I yelled

"HOE-LY SH-"

    Then a flash of purple Jello like energy while a portal opened and I felt like I was tripping balls....

    (Meanwhile in twilights library...)

"TWILIGHT!  ARE YOU OKAY!?!?" Spike yelled in a panic after the resounding back-fire of the trans-dimensional sender and receiver spell.

"Yes, I’m alright… how did that not work! I had every-*VORP*" She was interrupted by a portal much like the one she made not 2 minutes ago.

"SPIKE! SPIKE! LOOK IT WORKED! IT-*thump**SCREEEEEEEEECH*"

Again interrupted, but this time by a strange metal box with wheels that made a horrid noise. Just then the strange metal box started to move forward rapidly. She bolted towards the door, opened it, then ran out yelling wildly.

"EVERYPONY WATCH OUT!"

*CRASH**VROOOOOM* The strange object moved forward with increasing speed until it was moving almost as fast as rainbow dash (On the ground of course).

She jumped out of the way just as it sped by and rammed right into a lamp post, stopping dead. But, to make things stranger a rather large creature launched out of what appeared to be a window and did a tuck n’ roll like move, and lay on the ground, completely still.

"SPIKE!!!" She yelled with enough force to match Luna's Canterlot voice.

"Y-Yeah t-twilight?" Said the small shaken up dragon.

"Send a letter to the princess that we have a BIG problem!" She said with a frantic voice and she wearily approached the fallen creature.

(Back to Deckard)

'Oh god. What the fucking fuck.' He thought as he slowly awoke to pain, pain, and surprise surprise! More PAIN.

'okay, time to recap while my body reboots' He thought as his body slowly regained feeling to his… everything. 'I went from driving to screaming to weird purple portal to inside a house and breaking down the front wall to hitting a lamp post to going through the window… seems legit.'

As his body become functional he heard two sets of feet coming toward him.

‘ohgodohgodohgodOHGODOHGOD!!!!'

He tried to move but his body refused to respond

'Well this is it. Goodbye friends. And most importantly goodbye pain. I will not miss you'

He felt something nudge him and he tried to move but couldn't. Then he heard a very concerned sounding voice.

"SPIKE! GET FLUTTERSHY! IT'S STILL BREATHING!!!"

'Oh tha- wait spike? Fluttershy? Is this a gang or something...wait did she say "it"?'

About 10 minutes later he was in much more pain but he could actually move. Sort of.

'Oh god the paaaaaaaaaaaaiiin...make it ssstooop' He thought as he tried to speak through his pain.

"Aaarrrggghhhh...." He moaned out.

'First damn thing I've said'

"Oh my gosh! Your awake!" Said the lady. " Are you okay?"

I managed to pry one eye open to see a.......lavender coloured… pony…? It was staring right at my face. Then I had a epiphany...

'MY FRIENDS!?!?' I forgot the pain and shot up startling the lavender pony.

I slowly got up, ignoring the pony and made my way to the now wrecked truck with a shattered window.

"WAIT! Get back here!" the lady yelled.

"My.....friends...." I wheezed threw the mask which I completely forgot about.

I got to the car, went to the left side and opened the door. There he was strapped in with little damage done, from what I could see anyway. With my receding strength I pulled him from the car onto the pavement.

"What the......" The lady said.

"help......them…please" I said looking for Chris.

"Them? Wait you talk!?"

"yes....I....do" I wheezed.

I pulled out Chris from the back as he too had minimal damage done to him.

' why am I the only one ba-' Then I thought for a second as my brain somewhat turned on… 'Oh yeah…'

After I dragged them out I fell down.

'pain!!....aaaaagghh' "AAAARGH" I bellowed out.

Just then a yellow pony with a kit in its mouth came out forward. "Oh…oh my.. where does it hurt?" Said a gentle caring voice.

"Eh...every....where" I gasped out not seeing that the pony was talking.

"EVERYWHERE!?" The no longer gentle voice yelled. "TWILIGHT, WE NEED TO GET THESE CREATURE TO THE HOSPITAL!!!!!"

"Thank...you..." Then I finally blacked out.

Author's note: hey guys this was just an idea that popped into my head. Sorry it's kinda rushed but I will rewrite it later. But if you like the story tell me and I will continue it. But I will take my time with the next chapter if this story gets liked enough. Please R&R and be fore you do I know that the punctuation and grammar isnt perfect but I didn't wanna edit a one shot if it didn't get liked.