Bright Eyes stood patiently in line, doing his best to neither shrink and skulk from place to place nor run anywhere in panic. He'd kept his calm thus far; following the Guards' instructions to the letter, going where they said go, standing where they said stand. It was all rather unnerving, really. He was really starting to question his decision to come here.

That morning he'd finally plucked up his nerve and come up the long stairwell to the palace gates. The ponies in armor there had forced him to halt and demanded to know what his business was. Stammering, he'd made his request. After passing a funny green lantern over him, the two guards had looked at each other, shrugged, and let him in. They gave him a paper they said was a 'day pass' and told him to go to the throne room and stand in line with the petitioners.

After a couple of wrong turns and some directions from some kind servant ponies, he'd made his way to the throne room. It was an enormous round room with tall windows and a ceiling so high it made him dizzy.  He could see the Crystal Throne far off across the room, and what had to be  Princess Cadence sitting there. There was a wide red carpet running across the room to where she sat, and all sorts of important ponies standing in line. He'd meekly taken his place at the end of the line, trying to ignore all the funny looks he was getting, and waited his turn.

He was almost to the front of the line now, and his jitters were getting worse by the second. He felt like he had a jillion guppies flopping around in his stomach. He really needed to pee. And the curious looks he was getting from everypony were making him want to turn around and run for his little pony life. Why did this have to be so complicated?

He was there. Princess Cadence looked down at him from her glittering throne in surprise. Her husband was standing next to her; he looked at Bright Eyes in surprise as well. Did he recognize him? "Well, hello there," the Princess said, smiling.

Bright Eyes felt his stomach unknot a little; she looked very kind. Surely she wouldn't get angry for him bothering her...

He bowed nervously. "Hello, your Majesty," he said. He just managed to keep the quaver out of his voice. "My name is Bright Eyes."

"And what petition would you make of the Throne, my little pony?" Princess Cadence asked.

Mistaking Bright Eyes' hesitation for uncertainty, the Prince Consort leaned forward. "She means 'what did you want to ask,' " he explained in a low voice.

Bright Eyes refrained from telling him he understood; he just nodded and looked back to the Crystal Princess. "T-the guards at the front gate said that if somepony had something they wanted to ask you, they had to come here and wait with the ponies standing here in line...." he said carefully.

"Yes? And what did you want to ask?"

Bright Eyes took a deep breath.

"Can Nyx come out and play?"

The laughter built slowly, then swiftly rolled across the room. Bright Eyes sat there, doing his best to look as small as possible. The Princess merely sat there biting her lip, but he could tell she was struggling not to laugh too. When the laughter died down, she said "Well... Nyx is going on an outing with her grandparents today; if you hurry you can go along with them. I'm sure they won't object. Guard? Escort Mr. Bright Eyes to the Royal apartments upstairs and tell them why he's there."

She leaned forward. "From now on, Bright Eyes, I'll have the Guards take you right there when you visit. It's faster that way."

"Thank you, your Majesty," Bright Eyes said. He hesitated, fidgeting, suddenly remembering something else...

"You're welcome. Was there anything else you wished to ask?"

Blushing brightly, Bright Eyes looked around and edged forward with the air of somepony with a secret. Taking the hint, Cadence lowered her head and pricked her ear. He whispered in it for a second. The princess chuckled and pointed with a hoof. "Down the hall, first door to your left, sweetie. "

"Thank you," Bright Eyes said in relief. He galloped off, the guard escorting him having to trot to keep up. It took a second for the petitioners and courtiers to get the joke; when they did the laughter was even longer and louder than before.

Cadence looked at Shining Armor. "I want one," she said wistfully.

Shining Armor leaned in close and murmured in her ear. "As you wish. Shall we shop locally or mail order one?"

Cadence slugged him in the shoulder. Discreetly.

Twilight Velvet, Night Light, and Nyx were just getting ready to leave when there was a knock at the door. Waldorf opened the door to reveal one of the royal guard standing there; at his heel was a small white unicorn colt with a silver mane. "Officer Silver Saber, presenting one Bright Eyes, requesting an audience with the Princess' niece," the guard said formally, clicking his hooves together.

Waldorf cocked an eyebrow. "Young miss," he said over his shoulder, "a young gentlecolt caller for you." Nyx came to the door, peering around the butler's leg in curiosity. A smile lit up her face when she saw who it was.

"Bright Eyes!" she said happily. "Grandma, Grandpa, this is Bright Eyes, a friend of mine." The two elder Sparkles(1) came up behind her as Waldorf stepped aside. They were interesting looking ponies; they were both wearing loud floral-print shirts and sunglasses. The mare was carrying a large camera around her neck on a strap; the stallion was wearing a bucket hat and clenching the stem of a cigarette holder between his teeth.(2) "Why hello!" Twilight Velvet said, smiling.

"Well, hey there sport!" Night Light said. "What brings you by?"

"--The colt was given permission by Her Highness to request the honor of accompanying the young miss and her grandparents on their outing, ma'am," the guard said, clicking his hooves together again.

Nyx looked up at her grandparents. "Ooh, can he come with us? Pleeeease?"

"Well I don't see why not," Velvet said, looking at her husband.

"Do your parents know where you are, though?" Night Light asked him.

Bright Eyes nodded. "I told them I would be visiting a friend at their house," he explained.

Velvet looked amused. A foal's notion of what constituted fully informed and an adult's notion were two different things, as always. "I think we'll stop by your house to let them know all the same," she said. "Where do you live?"

"We live in the caretaker's house in the Crystal Heart Park, under the palace, Ma'am," Bright Eyes said. "My father's the caretaker."

"Oh, really, how fascinating..."

"Eep!" Nyx said suddenly. "I forgot my stuff!" She started to run back into the depths of the apartment, than turned back. "C'mon, Bright Eyes, come and give me a hoof!"

Bright eyes hesitated and looked up at Nyx's grandparents. At their smile and nod he trotted after the little black alicorn. "Thank you kindly, Guardsman," Velvet said to the pony-at-arms. He nodded, turned around and marched off.

"...Sunglasses." Bright Eyes read off the list.

"Sunglasses?" Nyx donned her enormous tinted spectacles. "Check."

Bright Eyes dutifully ticked off the box on the list with a crayon. "...Hat."

"Hat?" The legendary chapeau floated out of the closet and plopped down on Nyx's head. "Check."

"...Spending money."

Nyx dropped a coin purse into the open saddlebags on the floor. "Check."

"....Towel?" Bright Eyes read, confused.

Nyx trotted out of the closet. In her mouth was a bright purple towel in monogrammed with the legend "hoopy frood." She dropped it in the saddlebag. "Check."

"...Smarty Pants."

The doll landed in the other saddlebag. "Ooh, did you bring Bilbo Burro?" Nyx asked. Bright Eyes nodded and opened his own saddlebag; nestled inside were a lovingly stitched burro doll, right next to a copy of "There and Back Again" and a toy sword made of wood. Nyx nodded in approval. "Check and double check. What next?"

Bright Eyes looked at the list. "PeeWee?"

"Right!" Nyx whistled. There was a loud cheep, and the fat little phoenix chick flew into the room and alighted on Nyx's hat. Bright Eyes stared in awe.

"Wow," he breathed. "A real live baby phoenix! Where'd ya get him?"

"He's not mine, he's Spike's," Nyx explained. "Spike got him on the last great dragon migration."

"So why does he hang out with you?" Bright Eyes asked.

Nyx looked around. "I give him lots of cookies," she whispered. The two foals giggled. Bright Eyes looked down at the list. "And... saddlebags," he said.

Nyx took the strap on the bags in her mouth and expertly flipped them over her head. They landed perfectly across her back. "And... check." She smiled at Bright Eyes. "Let's go!"

The detour to the park was a quick one-- after all, it was directly below the legs of the gleaming spire that made up the royal palace.

And as it so happened, Bright Eyes' parents were perfectly fine with their son going on an outing with the royal family; They said so once they stopped stammering. (It was probably the two guards that were escorting them, Nyx figured. They still made her nervous, and she was used to them.)  

Once that was cleared up they all took a quick trot around the park, just to take in everything.  Nyx wasn't sure she liked it; for a park it was rather long on monuments and rather short on green grass and trees and swing sets. The crystal heart was really pretty though...

"Where are we going?" Bright Eyes asked.

"We're going to meet my Mom at the library," Nyx informed him. "She's been busy all day there, and we were gonna have lunch together."

"Oh." Bright Eyes paused. "Say, where are your sparkles? I just noticed they're gone."

Nyx looked at herself in surprise. It was true; she no longer sparkled like a crystal pony. "Hey, you're right," she said. She looked over at her grandparents. They weren't sparkling either. "Grandma, Grandpa, what happened?"

Grandpa Night Light grinned around his cigarette stem. "Your uncle-- that's the Prince," he said as an aside to Bright Eyes, "finally talked them into peeling off those extra enchantments on the Crystal Heart. Said it was a necessary security measure."

"So they could tell visiting ponies apart from the Crystal Empire citizens," Grandma Velvet explained. She sighed. "Ah, well, I will miss having my hair done up the moment I stepped outside..."

"Speaking of which, m'dear, you might want to powder your nose," Grandpa Night Light said. "It looks like we're about to be in the news." He pointed; headed their way was a small herd(3) of ponies-- some sparkling, some not-- bearing notepads and cameras.

"Oh my," Grandma Velvet said. She pulled a compact out of her saddlebags with her magic and checked her makeup. "Okay, now pay close attention, Nyx dear," she said. "I'm sure this will come in handy in the future. Now keep walking everyone." In the next moment the mob was upon them.

The two guards took up defensive positions, keeping the reporters at spear's length. Flashbulbs popped and a dozen voices started in at once. One yellow and teal pony managed to edge forward, addressing Night Light. "Sir! We in the press have some questions we'd like to ask--"

"Good for you, sonny!" Night Light said, grinning around his cigarette stem. "It's important to stay inquisitive. Keeps the mind active." --And turned away and kept walking.

The pony in question stammered, foundering in his own words. Another one took a shot. "Sir! Ma'am!"

"Well which IS it, young lady? You should be able to tell at your age," Velvet quipped, smiling for the cameras.

This journalista wasn't as easily tripped up. "Ma'am, what is your relationship to the former Nightmare Moon?"

"Fairly good, I would think. We do get along, don't we?" Velvet asked the latter of Nyx.

"Yes ma'am," Nyx said.

"There, you see?"

The reporter deadpanned. "Seriously, Ma'am--"

"Oh I'm always serious. It's only professional."

"Sir, Ma'am, we understand you are the parents of the Consort Prince," shouted another. "What are his plans for the Crystal Throne?"

"You'll have to ask his wife, she's the one who tells him where to move the furniture," Night Light said. "Poor boy. He'll have a bad back before you know it..."

"Is it true that Celestia is trying to gain influence over the Crystal Empire?"

Night Light looked at the reporter who shouted this. "Young fellow, you're going to have to be more specific than that.  But nice try, lad, nice try."

"What are the royal families' plans for the former Nightmare Moon? Why was she brought here?"

"Well, first we're going to meet her mother," Velvet said patiently. "And then we're going out for ice cream." This was greeted by cheers from the two foals, to the amusement of some of the audience.

This went on for several minutes, with news ponies pitching questions and Twilight Sparkle's parents, for lack of a better word, bunting. Even the stoic guards were starting to smirk as the pony paparazzi found themselves stumbling and scrambling to do anything with the vague, frustrating or even bizarre answers these two unicorns were giving them.

Finally one of them crossed the line. A belligerent stallion edged forward. "How do we know all of this isn't a conspiracy to steal the contents of the tomb and keep the Crystal Empire under the hoof of the Diarchy?"

"Other than a complete lack of any kind of proof?" Night Light said dryly. "Common sense comes to mind..."

The pushy pony wasn't deterred. "Well, with all the questionable individuals and associations and nepotism among you, why should we believe that you aren't? How do we know you're not just releasing the contents of the tomb to lull everypony into a false sense of security--"

This one made Night Light stop in his tracks and turn to look at the one who spoke. His dark glasses gave him a blank, bug-like stare. "I cannot rightly comprehend the confusion of ideas that can lead somepony to ask something like that," he said. "Are you stupid, boy? Are you mental?"

He stepped forward, his stemmed cigarette nearly poking the pony in question in the eye. "Don't mess with me, boy. I am one of Equestria's fierce beasts.  I am the original steam powered animal; I have dual pistons and a built-in cowcatcher and I will roll over your tiny ego like a herd of pie-crazed buffalo. I have SEEN horseapples.

"I spent a portion of my daughter's cuteceneara day as a potted cactus. I nearly was father in law to a giant cock-a-roach. I have alicorns in my kitchen on a regular basis. My family pic-a-nics in Everfree Forest and likes it.

The Elements of Harmony swap Hearthwarming gifts with us. The fruits of my loins are forces of nature, boy. My daughter juggles ursa minors for a pastime, makes Nightmare Moon sit in the corner when she's naughty, and turned a Chaos god into a birdbath. She and her friends destroyed the Grand Galloping Gala and Princess Celestia applauded.  My son slaps armies out of the sky by snogging his wife. My daughter in law sits on a THRONE and held the sky up for three days by sheer force of will.

"And every one of them calls me SIR!"

"Now, listen closely you cut-rate Gabby Gums. If the Dual Throne was going to conquer your Empire, it wouldn't look like this. It wouldn't involve polite little press releases where you lot sit around slurping gelato while Celestia's protege' announces she's trying to find one of your long-lost historical treasures. You wouldn't have your precious Crystal Heart back. You certainly wouldn't see the lawful heir to the throne in her rightful place.

"The only warning you'd receive before you woke up to Celestia and Luna on your thrones would be the sun going out. "

The newspony swallowed. Night Light grinned fiercely, his teeth grinding on his cigarette holder. "That's right. Darkness in Day. That's the only warning the Gryphon Empire had before their little act of invasion 400 years ago got a response.... a nice little mid-day eclipse. Twenty four hours later Celestia and the Solar Army were rolling up the last of the Gryphon Emperor's army like a pastry chef rolling up a blintz. It was a century before the sanctions were lifted and before any Gryphon was allowed to carry anything more intimidating than a butter knife. To this day the Gryphon Kings whitewash the seat of their thrones at the very thought of going to war with Equestria. They're not too fond of eclipses, either, come to think of it.

"THAT'S what a takeover by Equestria looks like!

"Celestia and Luna do not want to conquer you, or control you.  They've already got one kingdom to run, they certainly don't need two. They want to strengthen you, to give you the power to take care of yourselves.That's why her protege' found your crystal heart, that's why she's looking for the lost secrets of earth pony-- of crystal pony-- magic. Nopony would be wasting their time on that if all they wanted was to conquer the Crystal Throne. And you bloody well know that, you bush-league muckraker.

"AS to what 'the former Nightmare Moon' is doing here, what she's doing is being with her family. And our plans for her are to help her mother raise her to be a good, kind, decent, upstanding mare-- though as for that, seeing as Nyx gave up her throne, her power and even her name and became a little filly again because of her love for her mother, I daresay Twilight Sparkle is doing a bang-up job of raising her as it is.

"Now step aside, you son of a bird cage liner. We're on our way to meet our daughter." With that, he marched forward, looking neither left nor right. The newsponies parted before him without another word. His wife followed, trailed by two foals, who were gaping in awe, and two guards who were having considerable trouble not cracking a grin.

"I wish I could deal with bullies that good," Bright Eyes said, lost in admiration.

"Thank you," Night Light said over his shoulder. "But to be fair, I had an advantage. None of them were likely to try and give me a wedgie."

1)We are aware that this is not their actual surname. We would kindly request that the audience give us a freaking break.

2) The cigarette was never lit. He just liked how it looked.

3)Unoriginal, but how apropos.