Speech Increased To 2.5

by EdBoii

First published 25th of November, 2012

Generic Skyrim guard roams the land of Equestria, holding precious conversation with the natives.

Skyrim guard travels the magical land of Equestria, making friends and foes, having adventures and lecturing about proper citizen behavior.

But how will our hero fare against the native ponies with such a short repertoire of phrases? Will he help the land or cause its downfall? Should we follow?

Of course we should!

***

Tis the power bestowed unto thee, fair reader! You and none other than yourself (along with however many other readers there are) decide which characters our dear friend, Whiterun Guard #34 meets! Say so and so it shall be done!

Also, all comments saying anything about anything get a prize!

Trixie

It was a fine day in the magical land of Equestria. Birds were chirping and the wind was blowing a calm and gentle breeze over the fields and forests, caressing the land and its inhabitants with love and tenderness. Few were those who did not enjoy the day and its glorious endeavors to make everypony happy and joyful.

But one such mare existed that would defy the calm atmosphere and peaceful calm.

Trixie Lulamoon walked slowly and depressed through the wheat fields outside of Fillydelphia, thinking about the humiliation she had experienced earlier that morning, and the day before, and the one before it...

"Blasted ponies and their foolish ignorance! Do they not know that Trixie is the best and most powerful mare in Equestria?!" Trixie kicked at the ground angrily and snorted in annoyance. It was all Sparkle's fault as far as she knew. If it hadn't been for that unicorn she would still have her cart, her fame, and her reputation. All of that was gone now, and the whole of Equestria knew it.

From town to town she had wandered, seeking her audiences of old, but nopony payed her a second glance anymore. She was a showmare without a stage, without a public.

Trixie sighed sadly and kept on walking, the wind brushing past her mane and coat as she moved. The unicorn was heading towards Manehatten, hopeful that the news had not reached the coast by the time she got there.

Trixie looked up at the skies and searched for a sign, a phenomenon that would grant her fame and power like the one she used to hold. Clouds moved softly and carelessly through the blue sea of above. No premonitions or prophecies were seen by her that day.

Letting out another sigh, Trixie moved ahead. Barely noticing the increase in the strength of the wind as she moved.

The wheat fields began to sway back and forth, pushed and pulled by the ever increasing power of nature. Trixie cast a worried look around and quickened her pace, not wanting to be caught by a storm in the middle of a field. The blue mare ran through the wheat and as far as she could into a nearby forest, hoping that the branches of the tree would be enough protection from the wind.

But alas! That was not the greatest of her worries, for the winds and thunder that followed were but signs of a much greater power brewing atop of the skies! From a land of ice and cold, a far stranger creature than the world had ever seen was being dragged into Equestria!

The sky rippled like water and a column of fire, ice and lightning descended unto the land, scorching the wheat beneath it. Trixie gasped and hid behind a large oak tree in hopes of not being harmed by the blast that resulted after the elements collided with the ground.

"Ponyfeathers! What in the hay is going on?!"

An area of twenty five kilometers was suddenly illuminated by red, blue, and white light as the column exploded and faded into oblivion, leaving the fields burnt and useless.

Trixie slowly emerged from her hiding spot, lips quivering with fear and eyes wide.

"Sweet Trixie, what in the name of Trixie has happened?" The conceited mare moved slowly towards the ravaged fields, containing her breath as the scent of scorched dirt filled her nostrils.

She gasped when she saw what awaited her amid the smoke and burnt wheat.

A biped creature clad in scale armor with a yellow cloth running down his shoulder to his waist. The creature sported a metal helmet and a sword. It was a male, given away by the muscular arms and thick build. He was standing in the middle of everything without even noticing the destruction around him.

Trixie gulped and took a step forward.

"M-maybe this is the sign I was waiting for? Will this strange being help Trixie rise to fame once more?"

The closer she got, the stranger the being became. He just stood there, looking off into the distance without a care in the world. Occasionally glancing around or flexing his arms, but nothing more. He was the epitome of stillness.

Trixie stood beside him, carefully thinking to what to do. She took a deep breath and raised a hoof to gently prod the creature.

She froze as he turned to see her, eyes looking indifferently through the thick helm, gazing into her own. Trixie gasped and fell on her back out of fright, the biped simply looked at her for a little longer before speaking in a very deep and thickly accentuated voice.

"You're the one who cast those illusions. Impressive."

Trixie gaped at him for a couple of seconds, wondering how he knew of her special talent, or how he survived the explosion of light of a couple of minutes before. Perhaps he was some sort of magician? A god? Maybe he was a creation of Discords back when he ruled the-

"No lollygagging."

Trixie blinked and frowned. "Who are you to tell the Great and Powerful Trixie how to act?! Such insolence! Why you-"

"You're that one from the college. Heard about you."

Trixie blushed furiously as the memories of her wild college years rushed through her mind. Turns out that drinking and a bathroom mirror did not go well with her narcissistic tendencies.

"What?! Tr... Trixie doesn't know what you're talking about! It's all lies! Meant to soil Trixie's good name! Trixie swears!" She looked from side to side, worriedly hoping nopony was hearing the awkward exchange.

"Trouble?"

"N-no! Not at all! We do not want any trouble! Here, have these coins and make sure not to tell anypony about this ok?" Trixie pulled out a bag of bits and threw them at the guard's feet before dashing out of sight as fast as her embarrassed legs could take her.

The guard did not notice her leave, nor did he pay much mind to the bag of coins at his feet. He just stared off into the distance and flexed his muscles once more.

"I'd be a lot warmer and a lot happier with a bellyful of mead."

And so he departed, making his way to the nearest settlement in the horizon.

Luna

The cold night air swept through the streets of Fillydelphia, chilling the passersby that remained outside after the sun had set. The moon shone in the sky above, illuminating the streets with its silvery glow as the ponies moved about hurriedly back to their homes. Fearful of the shadow that descended from the skies.

Ponies rushed to cover as the dark chariot touched the ground, the dark and mysterious guards pulling it glowered menacingly to any who would dare look upon their mistress as she exited the carriage. Dark and powerful it was, strong and mighty. The princess of the night touched the cobblestone road and looked around.

"Splendid, nothing has changed..." Luna sighed and lowered her ears as she was met with the frightened glances of a dozen ponies. She wanted nothing else than their love and respect, why could she not have it?

The dark mistress of the night turned to her faithful knights and nodded once, for nothing else was needed. Both stallions were as alienated from the world as she was, both were as lonely as she had been for millenia. Thoughts and feelings were easily exchanged but with a glance between outcasts.

The night guards nodded their reply and took to the skies, leaving their mistress to her duties while they returned to a lonely castle, cold and uninviting, full of those whom did nothing but judge and avoid them. Yet another night for the night guard.

The princess turned her gaze to the wheat fields beyond the city borders, noticing the burnt crops and the cloudless skies. The magical blast from earlier had cleared the skies better than any pegasus team could, and scorched the land with more ferocity than the mightiest dragon. It had been miraculous that nopony was hurt and now Luna was to investigate it's source.

The princess moved through the buildings till she reached the edge of town, expecting to find the source of the disturbance in the near surroundings. As far as their knowledge of the event went, some form of magical phenomenon obliterated the fields and grasslands. With nothing better to do, and wanting to regain the love of her subjects, the princess of the night decided to take upon the dangerous task herself.

Now there she was, wandering the open fields after leaving the buildings behind. Searching she was, for whatever creature was foolish enough to threaten her ponies. Because no matter, oh, no matter how horrid! How bestial, how hideous or deformed! It did not matter the amount of fangs, or claws, or-

"Staying safe I hope."

"Ah!"

Luna gasped and turned around as fast as her startled hooves would allow her. Her breath coming out ragged from the fright and adrenaline that coursed through her veins.

"WHO GOES THERE?!"

Luna stopped at the sight of something... something odd. She shook her head and stared. She simply, stared. The creature before her was as strange as could be, with armor from somewhere else far from Equestria, a body that resembled the ones of species not native to her home.

Most unsettling however, was the way he stared back. Empty and seemingly lacking in intelligence, the creature looked like a very contrasting piece of the scenery.

"Bit late to be wandering around, isn't it?"

The dark princess' horn was aglow and ready to strike should she be given the slightest excuse, she was ready and experienced in magical combat. But she wasn't trained to face a beast such as that.

"Everything alright?"

Her brow furrowed and her stance normalized, but her horn stayed prepared. The situation was, confusing, at best.

"WHO ART THOU? WHAT IS IT THOU SEEKED WITHIN THE CONFINES OF THIS OUR FAIR NATION!"

Luna intensified the glow of her horn and took a step forward.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch the magic!"

"GIVE US GOOD REASON!"

The strange being stared at Luna, in defiance, she could only guess. His gaze met hers and both looked at each other as if they were mortal foes. A battle would spark, of this she was certain. The beast against the goddess, a tale worth of remembrance and song!

"I need to ask you to stop. That... shouting... is making people nervous."

"Huh?"

"Heard about you and your honeyed words..."

---/\--- ( \0/ _\0/ ) ---/\---

Somewhere in the eastern city of Manehattan, amongst the tall buildings and small apartments. A lonely mare spat out her cereal as the cheesiest, most emotional, and one sided conversation unravelled.

---\/--- ( € _ € ) ---\/---

"A-and t-then s-she just banished me! J-just like that! I mean, what sister does that?!"

Our hero found himself laying down on the grass, in pretty much the same manner he would have been should he be standing. Rigid and oddly still. However, that was not the strangest sight by far, not at all.

With her head resting on his chest, tears falling down her face and sniffling uncontrollably, was the princess and sovereign, ruler and mistress of the night. Princess Luna.

"By the gods, I don't know what to say..."

"I know! I-I know! Who would ever do such a thing?!"

She broke down into another fit of weeping and wailing, letting the sadness and sentiment of a thousand years free after decades of holding them in. The emotions flowed freely and unabated, it continued until the early hours of the morning as she unleashed her frustrations into our hero's ears.

By the time she was supposed to end her night so her sister could commence her day, she stood and smiled at her confidant.

"We- I would would like to thank you, friend. For listening to me in my hour of need. Say, what is your name?"

"What is it?"

"Yes, your name. What is it?"

Luna chuckled lightly and nodded for her friend to continue. Such a silly creature.

Our hero thought long and hard about the question, just as he did with every single thing he ever did. One does not simply attack a man that can shout his enemies off a cliff because he stole a sweet roll without thinking about it, right?

"What are you doing that for?"

Luna frowned.

"Is it not customary for friends to exchange names in your homeland?"

"Everything alright?"

"Yes, yes of course. It's just, well, strange for me not to know a friend's name... I should probably get going however, I'll be needed back in Canterlot."

"No lollygaggin."

"Yes, of course. Farewell friend, I hope we meet again."

Luna unfolded her wings and departed, leaving a silvery trail behind her that lifted the dark skies and gave way to the orange dawn. Moments later, a yellow sun began to float upwards without a care in the world.

"Watch the skies, traveller."

Our hero turned around and walked away.

Only to stop in front of a generic tree, flex his muscles, and stand guard. This went on for the rest of the morning before he walked back to the spot he had originally been at before, and stood guard there for the rest of the day.

At night, he resumed his walk in search for the nearest town.

Author's Notes:

Omigosh! New chapter yay!

FUS RO DAH MOTHERBUCKERS! FUS RO DAH!

Hope you liek it, took forever and I dunno why :P

ShiningHill

Skyrim

His armor clanked loudly as he ran, the sun shining overhead as the chill in the wind bit down on his face. It was cold, it always was in skyrim, and the Dragonborn could feel it in his body as he moved. It was yet another day in the land of the nords.

He ran across the plains of Whiterun with his two handed sword on his back, his shield on his back, his other sword on his back, his four pairs of gauntlets, three boots, four fur armors, six daggers, five potions of varied purpose, two iron helmets, three cabbages, a bee, butterfly wings, Blisterwort, Bleeding Crown, bones, alto wine, mead, deathbell, ten sweetrolls, clam meat, dog mea- seriously? What do you even need that for? leg of goat, mammoth snout, carrots, potatoes, and many amulets of many different gods he neither worshipped nor appreciated in the slightest, but gave cool bonuses, all on his back, pockets, under his helmet and a few others stuck in places we should not mention...

The great hero of legend ran across the tundra, wary and cautious as he moved in a steady pace, fully aware of the many beasts that could cause his downfall. He was a warrior, a fighter, a true hero of legend and bane of all evil and-

Ooh! Tundra cotton!

One cannot face the evil of the dragons without a steady supply of fluffy cotton, you know...

After the mighty hero had gathered cotton, butterfly wings, and slain many dangerous and vile mudcrabs to his heart's content, he resumed his gait towards the great walls on the horizon.

Ah! The great city of Whiterun! Her tall walls became visible as the Dragonborn approached it. The city shone in all her glory. All seven buildings and, like, twelve residents reflecting upon her prosperity.

The dragon hunter moved up the path that led towards the city's gate. He passed many merchants that offered him their wares, but he knew better. Skooma, not even once. Unless he took it from a dead merchant for free, in that case it was ok.

Our hero, bearer of a mighty and powerful name worthy of only the strongest of warriors, trained in many forms of combat, master of over three hundred ways of slaying dragons, and brave commander of many men, Richi Phelps, approached the gates and awaited to be allowed inside. He waited and waited, staring ahead at the lone gate left unguarded.

Umm... Where was the guard that was supposed to let him in?

Equestria:

Our hero walked without hurry across a different type of area. He was surrounded by many grassy fields, a few trees on the west that made way for a much larger forest a little ways back, and a vast expanse of flatlands. It was the border between Fillydelphia’s wheat fields and Hollow Shade’s dark forest.

The brave guard stopped walking and stared dead ahead at the forest. Images of frost trolls, bears, spiders, spriggans, giants, wolves, bandits, assassins, and many other foul monsters passed before his eyes as he stared. Our hero was ignorant of what lay beyond the trees, but he knew from experience that forests held many dark and dangerous creatures. It was the wisest choice to avoid the tree line than to brave its darkness, lest he found himself under the claws of some untamed creature of the wild.

And so, with the great aid of profound knowledge from past experience, and no little supply of common sense, the wise guard of Whiterun made a beeline straight for the forest…

He walked for a few minutes without stopping, the air growing colder as the sun fell into the horizon, making way for the night. It was chilly, but nothing compared to Skyrim! As a guard, he was used to soldiering on outside the comfort of a building and hearth, holding a position beside a wall for hours on end with a sleeveless cuirass for warmth. Commander Caius was such an intelligent man; of course sleeveless armor that also ended just above the knees was the defense of choice for weather such as Skyrim’s!

With thoughts about how great Skyrim’s military was, what with the main strategy being charging into the fray regardless of enemy numbers or strength, only to fall to your knees wounded, surrender, and then stand back up only to fall again, the guard continued his march well into the dark forest. The trees above blocked out the moonlight, making the atmosphere dreary. The random fog and wolf howls only accentuated it.

*Ribbit*

The guard stopped. He had heard a noise from the nearby bog, and as all who adventure know, there is no better place for safe adventures than a bog amid a dark forest. The guard turned and walked off into the forest, leaving the faint dirt path he had been following.

The trees loomed menacingly over him, looking down with evil intent. The chirping of the crickets was ominous and omnipresent, the howling of the beasts strong and unrelenting. The guard stopped as he reached a clearing, a small pool of water resting in the middle.

*Ribbit*

A small toad, not larger than the palm of a giant and slightly smaller than the foot of a troll, was in the middle of the water. The toad stared ahead at the guard, and he stared back. Both their gazes were kept for a long while, the toad’s throat expanding and deflating as its sound escaped and flew into the guard’s ears.

“What is it, Argonian?”

*Ribbit*

“Trouble?”

*Ribbit*

“No lollygagging.”

The toad remained silent for a little while after the guard’s words. It remained staring ahead, looking at, through, and beyond the guard. Its gaze was that of wisdom untold.

The guard stared back for several minutes, possibly admiring the mighty creature before him, or simply indulging in what seemed to be both of their favorite pastimes, staring ahead.

Eventually, the guard simply turned around and walked back towards the path, decided to continue whatever it was he was doing before. He traced his path back through the trees, keeping an eye out for the dirt path he had left behind. He found it after a few minutes, standing where it had been before.

The guard walked down the path and deeper into the forest, paying little attention to the loud thumps behind him and the muffled croaking sounds behind his back. He continued walking until the fog began to grow thicker and he could see little more other than a few meters in front of him.

The brave guard eventually stopped.

He was being followed…

Our hero turned around as swiftly as possible, making certain to keep a hand on his sword and the other on his shield. The guard unsheathed his weapon and readied himself, entering the traditional combat stance. Knees spread as if giving birth, shield raised to cover all the important areas except the chest and neck, and sword at the ready.

And then it came, out of seemingly nowhere, a shape emerged from the fog. It was a white stallion clad in gold and violet armor, a horn atop his head and a spear on his hoof. The stallion approached and spoke in a voice full of authority.

“You’re out late sir.”

Our hero looked at the stallion with his characteristic non-caring gaze, his sword still firmly gripped by his hand. He answered with a question, not really caring for the answer.

“Bit late to be wandering around, isn’t it?”

The stallion started circling around the guard, his spear at the ready and his eyes never leaving our hero’s sword arm.

“Mind telling me why you’re sneaking about? I don’t think I have to tell you what the Legion thinks about thieves, now do I?”

The guard turned to look at the stallion, an officer he could only guess, and one of the empire…

“You come talking to me wearing imperial armor? You got stew for brains?”

The stallion clenched his jaws and glared at the guard, his spear raised and aimed at our hero’s chest. Shining his armor was and his spear gleaming as well. The stallion took a step forward and his chest swelled in pride and anger.

“You dare oppose the might of the Imperial Legion?”

“You come up to me, fists raised? You looking for a beating?”

And so, with the final words having being spoken, the stallion and guard shouted their war cries and met in the middle.

“Remember the Emperor!”

“For Skyrim!”

The white stallion thrust forward, keen on impaling our hero. But he was clever. The guard raised his shield and blocked the attack, the force of the blow being absorbed by the wood on his shield. He faltered not, and after a grunt of annoyance, his own attack was well under way.

The guard swung his blade and the stallion was forced back, unable to neither block nor parry.

“Pigsticker like that’s not going to get you far. Best visit the blacksmith.”

The stallion glared and swung the speartip at the guard, his resolve unwavering and his step sure and certain. He assaulted with a combination of swings and thrusts, so fast and savage that our hero was unable to hold his own. The guard was forced back against a tree, and the stallion asserted what would have been a final blow, had it not been for an ally of our hero’s.

The armor clad stallion lit his horn and aimed it at the guard, intent on finishing the battle in a single strike. But before his shot could leave, a long and sticky muscle shot out from the fog and smacked him across the face.

Huzza! For it was the toad!

The benevolent and slimy knight of the bog emerged from the fog and defended our hero in attitude selfless and bold. The stallion was struck, away he fell and his concentration shattered, his magic bolt missing the guard by inches alone.

“Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! Watch the magic!”

The toad of might and valor took the fight home for the white knight, forcing him back with thunderous laps and licks from his dexterous tongue. In the end the stallion could no longer hold, and his spear he was forced to drop.

“I yield! I yield!”

The toad stood proud and indifferent before his captive, the guard walked towards them and spoke to the stallion.

“You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people. What say you in your defense?”

The stallion looked at the guard sourly, anger in his eyes. He then replied, almost spitting the words out with disdain.

“Bet you think you’re somethin’ huh? You call yourself a citizen of the empire? No respect for order, no respect for law. You make me sick.”

The guard and toad looked down at the stallion, defeated and at their mercy. Our hero sheathed his sword and the toad its tongue. The guard ordered the stallion to follow with a gesture of his hand.

“You’re going to rot in (closest named jail)”

The stallion gave him a confused look before standing and following the guard down the path. The toad walked behind him, blocking the only escape route. The three of them walked down the foggy road until they could barely see a foot in front of the other. The only thing to mark their passing was a rusted old, green sign with words written in white letters. It stood ominously by the side of the path, nothing visible behind it.

It said;

Author's Notes:

People wanted me to do Shining Armor and an Oblivion guard. So I figured, why not both?

Hollow Shades Part 1

“Is that… fur? Coming out of your ears?”

“For the thousandth time, yes! Yes it is! I am a pony, and I have fur in my ears! Is that so hard to understand?!”

“What is it, imperial?”

“You’re getting on my nerves! That’s what!”

*Ribbit*

Our heroes marched through the fog and foliage, wading across a shallow stream and into a minuscule wheat field as they followed the path deeper into the forest. It was dark, terribly so; it had come to the point where not even the fog was visible, as night had obviously descended upon the small group of heroes.

The toad and the guard, followed by their prisoner Shining Armor, had been walking for several minutes in complete silence. Not a bird, a raccoon, nor an alicow present to fill the night with beautiful sounds of chanting, raccooning, or mooing magically through cow-horns.

It was eerie to say the least. The trees loomed over our brave heroes as they jumped over fallen logs and twisted roots that stretched over the unkempt dirt road, making the trek perilous and exhausting. Yet they kept up their pace, intent on getting Shining Armor to the nearest jail—which was something the confused stallion could not truly understand, as any jail they went to would belong to Equestria anyways.

But their peaceful walk would not last long. There, amidst the darkness and shadows of the trees, a creature lurked. The beast watched with undefined intent as our heroes walked through its territory, but as stealthy as it was, it couldn’t avoid every single twig.

*Snap*

The guard turned around on his heels and stared. He looked through the trees and searched for the source of the noise, his hand hovering over the hilt of his sword.

Shining Armor stopped walking and turned to face the guard—eyebrow raised and steady on his hooves, ready to defend himself should an attacker appear. The stallion did as the guard had, and eyed the woodland around them; he tried his hardest to see past the fog and darkness, but all was in vain.

“You hear that? I swear, there’s something out there. In the dark.” The stallion eyed the guard, slightly unsettled by his words.

“What do you mean? You can’t tell me you’re afraid of a few trees, right?”

Our famed hero turned to look at Shining, his helmet concealing any manner of expression he could have had, and he spoke.

“I fear the night. Because werewolves and vampires don’t.”

Shining Armor blinked, a light chill running down his spine as the thought sank in. The stallion turned to look at the surrounding flora with a more wary eye; steeling himself for an attack should it come. His horn glowed in-

‘Wait… I can still use my horn!”

Facehooving for his own stupidity, Shining Armor set his magic free on his two captors, and sent the guard and his slimy companion tumbling backwards with a strong magical push before darting away into the darkness, his eloquent words echoing through the shadows.

“So long criminal scum!”

The guard fell on his backside, managing to land on a small puddle of slime and staining his cuirass on the last three lettered part of said word. His trusty companion faring no better, as his beautiful toad-face landed square on a differently-colored puddle of equal matter.

“Be careful!” Hollered our dear protagonist as he slowly stood back up, his sore backside still wet with what seemed to be lime-colored green goo. But alas! His excellent choice for words would not save him this time! For as he stood; the slime that had collected on his butt began to fall onto the ground and pile up behind him, taking the form of… something.

“By the gods! What manner of power is that?” The guard looked on in passive non-caringness as the slime piled up and began to transform into the shape of a lime-green earth pony with a cutie-mark depicting a gooey pool of light purple liquid.

The mass completed its transformation and glared with evil glee at our beloved hero, both of its pale blue eyes shining with malice.

“Ha! I gotcha, fool!” The slimy pony took a threatening step forward, with his body and pale orange mane dripping as if made from liquid—which it probably was.

“In all my years, I’ve never seen such a thing…” was the confused reply from our hero as he tried to process the economic implications of such a creature. Would it permit for easier unification of wooden structures and allow for cheaper building materials, or was it too difficult to acquire so that only jarls and thanes would be able to construct with it? And would it drip for that matter? It certainly wouldn’t-

Oh, right! The fight! Ahem.

The slimy pony winced slightly, and its ears drooped downwards, but it didn’t break its fighting stance.

“I’m not a ‘thing’ you know; just because I’m a Goo-Pony doesn’t mean you get to call me names…”

It was then, right in that precise moment, that our hero realized something. He had seen it before and not too long ago either. It had plagued the mind of another pony, and so it plagued this one’s as well.

The pony and guard stared at each other, one seeking a way to bring the second one down, and the other attempting to find the words to mend injured pride. But as all of this happened, it was behind them that a second battle took place.

“Stop! Please! It hurts!”

Pony screams filled the air as a valiant struggle took place between toad and equine. Neither surrendered, none gave up ground as their foe advanced. It was a god-thought battle of the ages, and it seemed like there would be no victo-

“I give! I give! Please stop licking my tummy!”

Wait… what?

The toad retracted its tongue and jumped backwards, doing a backflip before landing behind its prey. Said pony was sprawled on the ground, squirming and struggling to contain the giggles and laughter that the thorough belly-licking had left in its wake.

Our brave toad croaked in its heroic and elegant manner before eyeing the pony with indifference that almost rivaled that of our beloved guard, but fell short on the amount of style required to carry it out. Regardless, the mare before it melted almost immediately, and quite literally too.

She gave a final giggle before turning into a pool of liquid that resembled a rose in color, and lurched towards our toad of a hero. The toad gave a startled croak but managed little else as the oozing substance completely surrounded it and rendered any movement impossible.

The rose-colored goo gave an echoing giggle as the toad was encompassed and immobilized; it sounded ethereal and omnipresent, with its source undefined and mysterious. But the owner was well known, and made itself apparent as the mare’s face modeled itself out of the shapeless goo.

“Hey there…” Said the mare’s head; now fully formed and staring straight at the face of our toad.

The amphibious hero stared right back at her, and out of its mouth came the most eloquent piece of speech ever listened to or admired by sapient beings. Sadly enough, it was so pure that by simply not being there to hear it, you become unworthy of its words. Thus, you may never hear it.

The mare smiled, and planted a light peck on the toad’s head causing no reaction whatsoever. It was an iron-hearted toad.

But back to our beloved guard we must return! For he was amidst a combat of the ages against a foe of similar prowess, and the fighting was about to increase in intensity.

The goo-pony lashed out with a hoof, but the blow was absorbed by the… huh… he didn’t even try to avoid the hit; he simply took it to the chest and grunted out a threat. Incredible training these guys get…

Matters not! For as the monster pony puzzled over his failed attack, the brave guard raised his arm—sword in hand, and brought it down with tremendous force against the pony’s head. The blade slashed cleanly through the abomination of nature, slicing it apart in a clean swipe.

The pony’s legs buckled, and his body fell apart; turning into a pool of slime before our guard. Our hero turned around and faced the trapped toad.

To his unsurprised nonexistent shock, the toad was already free and staring intently ahead, at seemingly, nothing. The guard reciprocated the action, and for several minutes nothing happened.

“Staying safe, I hope?”

*Ribbit*

“Trouble?”

*Ribbit*

The guard swiftly turned around, preparing himself for another attack thanks to the well-timed advice from his faithful companion. He was ready before the werepony struck.

A savage howl raged through the ears of all present as the half-wolf half-pony burst from the concealment of the trees and lashed out at the guard; his shield was barely able to block the worst part of the assault, and he came out from the attack with nary a scratch.

The toad hollered a mighty war-cry that rose into the very heavens before leaping in defense of its comrade. The powerful *ribbit* echoed ahead as the toad landed squarely on the face of the lycanthropic equine; effectively blinding it for several precious seconds.

The guard recovered from the previous blow just as the wolf threw the toad aside in anger; it landed a few meters away from the dueling fighters, unmoving.

“You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people. What say you in your defense?”

The werepony snarled viciously, pale cream fur mixing in with the fog around it; a bright two-toned blue and pink stripe ran down from its head and all the way back to the base of its neck, contrasting vividly with the dark atmosphere of the forest.

The guard glared with uninterested strength and steeled resolve of the likes which only a rock could conjure. The werepony began circling around him, and he made sure to keep himself between his injured comrade and the beast. Alas that he did not pay closer attention to the puddle of slime he had believed defeated!

Our brave guard suddenly lost his footing, feeling the ground disappear from underneath him and then reappearing far too close to his face for comfort. Standing on his back was the lime-colored pony from before, his hooves leaking slime into the guard’s cuirass.

“Ha! Gotcha again, fool!”

From the corner of his eye, the guard could make out the struggling shape of his toad-friend. The slimy knight placed leg after the other, trembling greatly as it tried to move forward; concern showing clearly across his otherwise passive features, and the desperation in his step was obvious in the way it continued onward despite the obvious pain it suffered.

On quivering legs and broken bones, the toad tried one final time to defend its friend. It opened its mouth and aimed, tongue ready to lash out at the attacking werepony.

But stopped as it caught the guard’s look.

“Stay out of trouble, Argonian.”

Such few words, but so sincere. The toad stayed its tongue and watched helplessly as the goo-pony encompassed the guard in its slime and forced him to move ahead, deeper into the forest. The werepony howled into the night one final time and followed.

It was there, amidst the darkness of the forest and the shallow dampness of the woodland, that a toad; a simple swamp beast with no more thought than the average rock, finally realized what it had gained, and what it could lose.

With a pained croak, the toad returned to its attempts at moving. Earnest in its task to rescue the guard.

To rescue its friend.

Hollow Shades Part 2

*Ribbit*

The fog had lessened.

*Ribbit*

The darkness had not left.

It lingered–heavy and daunting, always a constant reminder of the injuries and the pain sustained. The toad struggled greatly as it placed a slimy leg after the other, refusing to give way for the darkness that had begun to gather at the back of its mind.

It was cold.

*Ribbit*

Even its own croaking sounds could not break through the cold monotony of the forest. Not the wind; nor the birds, or the soft, tender caress of the solar rays could ease its pain–for there were none.

Trapped beneath a thick blanket of merciless foliage; stuck forever; damned to see its only friend be dragged into the shadows for devouring. The toad saw the trees.

No tears fell from its face. No quiet sound of suffering left its throat. Only the soft croaking could be heard; only the increased rate of its blinking eyelids could ever be seen and believed to have been mourning and pain of the likes few should sustain.

It simply croaked as it always had, until a soft *Ribbit* broke through the stillness of the night before the toad stopped moving.

*Crack*

Hoofsteps.

Squishy and fast-paced; moving hurriedly towards our fallen hero. The goo-pony mare slid the rest of the way from the trees and landed next to the unmoving toad.

"Oh no! Please get up!"

The rose-colored pony placed a trembling hoof on our hero's body, trying desperately to ease the toad back to its feet.

"Please, please, please! Oh no! I never meant for this to happen. I didn't know a werepony was following us!"

The toad didn't respond. It simply kept its eyes staring ahead, looking hopelessly in the direction its friend was taken. The goo-pony wept tears full of regret and viscosity, but stopped as realization dawned.

Standing back to her full height, the goo-pony replaced a frightened look for one full of determination.

"I'll help you get your friend back."

The toad twitched.

"And I'll help you get out of Hollow Shades."

*Ribbit*

A tongue shot out from our hero's mouth and planted a long, slimy, sloppy, and very grateful kiss on the goo-pony's cheek. She giggled madly and half-swooned, but managed to regain composure. The blush remained though, making a sizzling sound as some of the goo on her cheeks evaporated.

"Not now! We have to save your friend first, silly!"

The toad was rapidly swept up in a wave of red goo, and both love-slimes rapidly slid down the path in hot pursuit of the werepony and the guardnapped guard.

Into the darkness.

***

"It's a werewolf! To arms! To arms!"

Both of our guard's captors groaned miserably and kept on walking; trying their best to ignore the frantic moving of their captured guard.

"Werewolf!"

The were-pony whimpered and tried to cover its ears with a paw; the goo-pony sighed and morphed its ears into rock-shaped lumps. Both had walked for less than five minutes with the guard prisoner, and they were about to snap.

"Is that... fur? Coming out of your ears?"

They had tried setting him free, but then he'd just attack them; they'd also tried losing him in the thick foliage of the forest, but that was even worse. He would run around the entire place shouting madly that he'd find them, or that 'You can't hide from me'.

In the end they just gave up.

"Wait... I know you."

The were-pony yelped as if physically struck and desperately tried to bury its face inside the goo-pony.

"Hey! What the-!!"

More whining and yelping followed as the terrified were-pony desperately clawed at its companion; trying like mad to get away from the scary chatterbox.

"No! Get out, out, out!"

Our beloved guard had long been released from his bonds, and he now calmly walked alongside his captors.

"Be careful!" Said our hero, eyeing the dangerous frivolities in which his newest acquaintances rejoiced with a wary look. He never did like lollygagging.

"Darn right she should be!"

The goo-pony clung to a tree branch as the were-pony barked and clawed at it, demanding that the slimy one come down from it to serve as her refuge.

Our guard looked on at the odd scene, wondering. His gaze staring off into the nothingness as it normally did; his thoughts piercing time and space as they ought to; his mentality trespassing the barriers of existence itself.

"Gah! She's got my leg!"

"Put that down!"

***

Toad and pony swept through the foliage of the forest, breaking branches and destroying bushes as they went. Like an unstoppable tsunami they went, and their passage was marked by the gooey trail left behind their wake.

*Ribbit*

"I know! We have to catch them, but I can't go any faster!"

Our brave toad of valor heard this and doubted. In one swift motion, the toad turned around so that he was facing the goo-pony's rear and jumped.

"Gah!"

The resulting impact caused the mare to yelp as the toad did the toad equivalent of spurring a horse onward, and our heroes were propelled faster and farther into the woods.

Needless to say, it was quite a surprise when they were met with a horde of undead.

Our brave toad warrior emerged from the goo-pony's butt, where he had become stuck after his valiant effort to accelerate the speed of their journey. His toady eyes gazed ahead at the undead, that his mare companion had not noticed yet, as she had been to busy panting and blushing with her eyes closed for some reason.

No matter! Our rating and setting does not allow for much more than that insinuation anyway, therefore, onwards!

The brave toad warrior jumped from the mare's butt and landed on her head, his little toad legs sticking into her gooey mane and providing a steadfast grip.

*Ribbit!*

He croaked, and the mare woke from her reverie.

"Gah! What in the horseshoe is that?!"

She shrieked and planted her hooves into the ground, causing both of our heroes to skid to a very slippery and perilous stop. Toad and mare screamed - or did the amphibious equivalent of screaming, which is very similar to a chicken's burp - as the zombie ponies turned their heads to look at them.

"We're gonna die!"

*Ribbit*

***

*whistles* "That is one... big hammer."

"What the-! I'm trying to pee!"

"What do you aim to do with that hammer, friend? Knock down a house?"

"Stop looking at it! No! Don't touch it!"

An angered stallion shouted from behind a tree, as our hero - the beloved guard of strength and might - rummaged through his toolbox. He had found a really nice hammer, and he was admiring it with indifference few could master.

This, for some reason, angered the stallion.

"No! Bad monster, bad! Put it back!"

Shouted the stallion as he zipped up his pants and angrily stomped his way to our hero. His fur was a yellow-green color, and his mane was deep brown. He stomped his way with great noise as his hands he waved with alarum.

It is not everyday that one would meet an anthropomorphic pony.

Off to the side of the tree were the scene unfolded, were the were-pony and the goo pony from before. Both were sitting under the cover of a dead oak tree, looking at the confrontation.

The were-pony growled something at the anthro pony, and the goo-pony translated.

"Yo, Nini. Bonny's saying to hurry it up! She hungry bro, but she no can eat nothin' if you don't open it up that tin can."

Bonny, the were-pony, growled again and bared her fangs, one of which was slightly chipped. Our hero's helmet had a corresponding dent on the side too.

"I'm trying, Lime, but he doesn't stay still... Where'd you find this guy anyway? He's fidgety."

Nini, the anthro pony, made a face and grabbed a wrench.

"Alright, dude. Just stay still..."

Nini neared our hero and placed his hand on his shoulder, trying to bring the wrench to his helmet. Sadly for him...

"I find your hand in my pocket, I'm going to cut it off."

...our hero disagreed.

Nini yelped and drew his hand back faster than a rabbit runs from a fox, his brow covered in sweat. His voice a squeaky little thing, he mumbled an apology and backed away.

Bonny growled. Lime, the goo-pony, sneered, and Nini squeed as ponies do.

It seemed like Nini was about to be scolded, but then...

"Wait... I know you!"

Bonny whimpered and backed away. Lime winced, and Nini gasped.

"It's a werewolf! To arms! To arms!"

Screams of desperation filled the night.

Hollow Shades Part 3: The Adventure Returns!

It's been a while, hasn't it?

Toad and Goo-Pony stood amid the foe, facing them without fear nor fright! They were brave fighters and warriors of-

"We're gonna die!"

*Ribbit*

Well, they were as brave as possible. Points for trying.

The undead army surrounding them advanced slowly but steadily towards them, leaving no escape routes for our trapped heroes. The night grew darker and the situation was most dire! Our beloved protagonists faced the worst possible situation, and there was none who could save them. This time the undead would feast.

The toad stood beside the whimpering Goo-Pony, staring ahead into the emptiness of the undead's eyes. They moved slowly and erratically, as if overwhelmed by massive amounts of alcohol in their system, but their eyes still showed the same amount of emptiness as-

*Ribbit*

The toad understood then. With precision the likes of which had never been seen before in Equestria, the glorious slimy knight executed a three-hundred-and-sixty degree jump over everyone's heads and landed behind the undead. Its shining green skin glimmered beneath the moonlight and reflected it across the entire area to cause a mesmerizing effect that momentarily blinded everyone. The Goo-Pony mare wowed in silent awe while the zombie ponies slowly turned around to face the other way.

The toad landed on its legs and a cloud of dust rose around it. Its slimy eyes were fixed on a specific spot in the nearest tree's bark, but it was obvious that its full attention was centered on the undead at all times.

*Ribbit*

"You're so brave!" Cried out the Goo-Pony mare, but the toad did not let her praise be a distraction! A toad has to do what a toad has to do always, and in this particular situation that meant kicking zombie butt.

Turning around with speeds that rivaled even a snail, the toad faced its foes and gave them its most ferocious and disinterested glare of pure bravery and might unparalleled by anything on the face of Equestria! The zombies advanced, but their own empty stares were met with that of the toad, and they found themselves sweating and feeling something they hadn't felt in a very long while:

They were nervous.

The toad kept his stare; it's invisible ray of intensity blasting at the pupils of the undead with such ferocity... No mortal equine nor man could ever hope to withstand the strength of that stare. Oh, dear reader, understand this when I tell you: the stare was more powerful than that of a highschool student in the middle of history class at the last hour before being able to leave.

The undead could not take it. For all their strength, their numbers, and their resolve to feast upon the flesh of the living; they were mere reanimated mortals. They felt the sweat building on their brows; they felt their knees grow week, and the stare pierced through theirs until they could do no more. They averted their eyes at the last moment, and the toad took his chance.

Toad stare intensified.

The Goo-Pony mare gasped, the world stood still for a moment, and the zombies felt fear for the first time in their new lives of undead-y undeadness. The toad looked ahead. The undead faltered and fell, one by one, until there were none left standing. The toad's stare tore through them all in a matter of seconds, and they collapsed by the sheer power of carelessness that irradiated from its eyes.

"You did it!" The Goo-Pony mare cried out with a giant grin adorning her face. She slid over to the toad and picked it up in her forelegs. "I knew you would save us!"

*Ribbit*

"Ohohohoho... Maybe later." She said, giggling. "But we have to find your friend first!"

*Ribbit*

"Right. Right... Hmm." She scratched her gooey head and thought long and hard. "I know! Let's follow that sign!"

Truly, a giant sign with bold words painted in red screamed from beside the pathway "THIS WAY!".

*Ribbit*

"Damn right it is convenient!"

Our heroes charged onward into the unknown!

***

"Could sure use a warm bed right about now..."

"TAKE IT! TAKE EVERYTHING, BUT PLEASE LEAVE US ALONE!" Screamed the terrified Succubi. "DO YOU WANT OUR DOORS TOO?! HERE THEY ARE! GO NOW! PLEASE!"

"Everything's in order." The guard said as furniture and doors rained down all around him from the balcony of The Ridden Mare. Our hero turned around and continued on his patrol around town. Truly, it was a beautiful night for guard duty. Although the panicking and screaming monster ponies all around sure were a strange sight, but the guard couldn't see any hostile NPCs around, so he just assumed it was like that one time the mammoths started flying.

Either way, our guard soon noticed a commotion nearby, so he decided to do his duty to the world and help out in any way he could. Our hero approached the gathering crowd of townsponies and stood to the side of them as a very angry pony covered by a heavy trench coat, shades, and a hat shouted angry pony words at the assembled crowd.

"We can't let this creature terrorize our town!" He was saying. "It has attacked the chickens, frightened the Succubi, taken a dozen of our Straw Pony farmers and locked them inside a barn, and now he's running around our streets without anyone to stop him!"

The crowd shouted in agreement and raised a large selection of crude, improvised weapons.

However, our hero would not allow such a strange creature talk of him in such a way! Our protagonist sucked in air, metaphorically, and spoke:

"Sheathe those claws, Khajiit." He said, and the entire crowd gasped.

The angry pony that had been shouting just seconds before suddenly found himself in trouble. Everyone stood aside to let the guard walk up to the pony. Both contingents stared at one another for many seconds, before the pony spoke out.

"Wh-what?! You can't tell me to shut up! I-" The pony said, angry, but unsettled by the empty gaze of our hero. It was deeply penetrating.

"Uch. Been tending your hounds? You smell like a wet dog."

The pony gasped and took a step back, while a few nervous laughs eased their way out of the crowd.

"Y-you insolent! I am Pierre du Mont Blanc! I am the most important! The most influential! The mayor of Hollow-!" The pony started to glow a deep red color, and our hero realized that the pony before him was invisible. His clothes were the only thing that made it possible for him to be seen, and still the anger flushed his emptiness until he glowed like a torch.

"You wear the armor of a brigand. Best not cause any trouble on my watch."

The crowd gasped and a few Oooohs! erupted all around. Unbeknownst for our hero, Pierre du Mont Blanc was facing charges for corruption and tax evasion. The red in Pierre's invisible body glowed hotter.

"Why you little-!" He half-shouted, but our hero was swifter.

"Hands to yourself, sneak thief." Our hero said and walked away, while the cheers of the crowd broke the silence in its entirety and drowned out the angry curses of Pierre. Our beloved guard sauntered off into the night to carry out his duty as best as he could. Meanwhile, the rising sound of a hundred ponies saying "Buuuuurn!" echoed through the night.

In the far distance of Hollow Shades' farthest crop fields, a terrified Werepony, Goo-Pony, and Anthro Pony huddled together; trembling at the memory of a guard and his lines...

Author's Notes:

I'ts been a very long while now! Well, glad to be back. Going to push out more chapters sporadically, but without so much space between them.

Later, lads, and remember... "Stay out of trouble, Imperial."

Hollow Shades Part 4: The Adventure Re-returns!

In Hollow Shades the night was fast coming to an end. Celestia's sun hovered just over the thin horizon, showering the treetops of the swamp in golden-green tones. But it wasn't the trees or the light that mattered, but the things that moved underneath. From the town hall, Pierre du Mont Blanc poured over an old map of the region, completely naked under a heavy raincoat and black fedora. It was very obvious for everyone involved.

"So..." Juniper Fields, his secretary and a vampire pony, cleared her throat. She was seated behind a desk a few ways to the side from her boss, with only a typewriter between her and how naked Pierre was.

He was very naked.

"For the last time, Miss Fields," he deadpanned from behind his polarized spectacles, still naked, "I am invisible. It does not matter. Yes?"

"Still tho."

A very heavy, uncomfortable silence fell between them. You could hear the sound of a teensy little fly stuck behind the wall plaster, precisely five paces and two hoof widths to the right of the mayor. Do recall this oddly specific description, I do swear it will matter later.

"Still what?" he asked. "You're naked too, you know? The only thing you're wearing is a bowtie, for Celestia's sake!"

The vampire mare bit her lip. Oh, she knew.

Suddenly feeling very exposed, Pierre closed the belt of his raincoat and tightened it hard enough to bite him. He cleared his throat and dabbed a few droplets of invisible sweat from his face, upsetting his spectacles in the process.

"Anyway. We have to do something to get rid of this.. this monster! before he ruins my chances to be reelected." He smashed a hoof against the desk, startling the vampire mare. "I want ideas. Good ones, and I want them yesterday!"

From across the room, seated on a little stool, a mysterious figure shuffled on his seat against his bindings and muttered words muffled by the gag in his mouth. Pierre stared at him a while longer, unsure of what to think, what to do, painfully aware of the very intense stare Juniper Fields was giving him from behind her typewriter. He shuddered. His entire campaign, heck!, his life itself was in jeopardy! Now the creature that had built him his fortune, his most trusted advisor, seemed to have nothing more to say. Trembling, as he always did when he tried this, Pierre crossed the room and removed the creature's gag.

"The entire town is at my throat." he muttered. "If I run now, creature, will I ever be able to recover?"

The creature stared at him a moment. His next words were a punch to the gut.

"Face your death with some courage, thief."

Pierre said nothing for a moment. He just trembled. "No! I'm not done yet. I built this town from scratch! I won't... I can't leave it behind. Without it I am nothing... I made Hollow Shades what it is now. I won't leave it." His voice was breaking.

"You made it? I was sure I'd find you face down in the dirt."

"Shut up!" he screamed, and grabbed the creature by the collar of its clothes. "I don't need you! I don't. I don't!" He repeated it like a prayer, shaking the creature hard and weeping invisible tears. Behind him Juniper Fields fanned herself hard with a stack of papers, eyes glued to the scene.

"You're still alive?"

Pierre stopped. He was on his knees, shivering, when the question shocked some sense into him. He was, wasn't he? A smile broke his lips. Yes, he was! He was alive and still as powerful and wealthy as ever, and nothing would stand in his way!

"Yes!" He laughed maniacally, hooves raised to the ceiling as random, unrelated lightning thundered outside the window! It would have been more impressive if he weren't, you know, invisible and all. But still. "I will get rid of the monster and reclaim Hollow Shades as mine! I WILL GET BACK WHAT IS MINE! MUAHA-AHA-AHOO-AHA-AHEEHEE-AHA-HOO!"

Overwhelmed by Pierre's seductive laugh, Juniper Fields bit off a chunk of her typewriter and fainted. The creature merely stared.

"Have you always been that ugly?"

***

A ways away from the town proper, a lone figure made his way across an empty field, strewn with crushed pumpkins and broken fences. His tall, imposing, mighty silhouette clashed against the gloomy backdrop of the town, and as he walked the very image of power seemed to be projected from each determined step. Truly, he was a being of radiant and immeasurable power! He was the guard!

"Gotta keep my eyes open. Damn dragons could swoop down at any time."

Watchful as ever, the guard of legend cast his gaze across the field. It seemed empty, but then again, experience had taught him that even the quietest patrol path could be crawling with enemies. That or it must have been the wind. One or the other.

Anyway! Fully alert, our legendary hero trained his sights on the path ahead, and lo and behold, a pony!

"Hello, monster!"

Our hero stayed still. Perfectly silent, waiting for the moment to strike or defend himself! Also the pony wasn't within detection range. It was a tiny pony, small and squishy, much like all the little equines—pale white of coat, with a buttery-yellow mane and ruby-red eyes—but this one was evil!

Brave and clever, our valiant hero reacted immediately! As the evil, stubby pony prepared her malignant machinations to be cast against him, he did nothing! Because she was still too far away! But he would have, surely, had she been but a few steps closer. Trust me. Confused, the mare dragged herself forward on her haunches.

"Helloooo? Mister Mooooonsteeeer?" she said, and scooted a scoot too close! At once, mighty and with speed to rival even the fastest Dwemer trap, our legendary hero drew his sword and assumed his battle stance, startling the mare out of her skin.

"Only burglars and vampires creep around after dark. So which are you?" The rasp of true, nord steel sang in the cool, morning air.

With her mouth in the shape and size of an ostrich egg, the mare stared at the mighty guard. 'How did he know?!' she thought, as every hair from the top of her mane to the tip of her tail stood at attention. Two long, sharp fangs glinted in the faint morning sun, and her cutie mark—a crystal goblet full to the brim with blood—shone under the glare of dawn. She tugged at her bowtie.

"W-well," she stammered, looking for words that could save her pony behind, within the wordbox all ponies had inside their pony brains. But there was naught but pony within. "I... you see, I am not..."

Astute beyond common understanding, our heroic guard understood then. He sheathed his sword.

"I know Thieves Guild armor when I see it. You're not fooling anyone."

In that moment Juniper Fields realized just how out of her depth she was. The monster clearly knew she was working for the mayor, and her infiltration/seduction/kidnapping/falling-in-love-and-moving-to-the-Pony-Alps-to-start-a-life-together-only-for-the-both-of-them-to-forget-what-it-was-that-had-made-them-fall-for-each-other-in-the-first-place, leading-to-a-life-of-frustration, resentment-and-desperation, that-would-lead-to-a-rough-falling-out, divorce, and-eventual-reunion years later, when-they-both-would-be-ill-and-only-then-would-they-realize-they-could-have-worked-through anything had-they-only-listened-to-each-other mission was ruined!

"I know your kind, always sneaking about," he said, and turned around to leave.

Juniper Fields stared at him a moment, trying to process those words. Quickly, shock turned to anger. He didn't know her at all! No pony did, and he did not have the right to just lump her up with ne'er do wells and no-good robber ponies like that! She stomped her hooves and ground her teeth together until it hurt. Juniper put one hoof forward, breathing hard, and prepared to charge.

Ahead, the guard didn't move. He didn't flinch, or even make the slightest attempt to defend himself. He knew his words truly were his sharpest and truest weapon. For behind him, the little pony's angry hoof began to tremble ever so slightly, and she fell on her hindquarters with a sad, deflated squeak. She was a bad pony. She couldn't deny it anymore, not when so boldly confronted and exposed. With big, teary eyes, Juniper looked up at the guard and extended her hooves. She'd never wanted a hug so bad in her life.

The guard turned to face her. He looked at her, through her, with a penetrable gaze that managed to both bore deep into her soul and look right past her at the same time. In that moment, more than ever before in her life, Juniper Fields felt naked and exposed, her very spirit laid bare to be judged. She began to salivate. Just a bit tho.

"Well. I'll let it slide this time. But you'd be smart to take that off. Someone might get the wrong idea."

Juniper squeed like no pony has ever squeed before and barrelled straight at the guard—tearing off her bowtie in the process—now free from Pierre's evil influence. She hugged dat guard. She hugged him like there would be no tomorrow, like the world might end and he was the last bit of solid matter left in existence. Her soft, plushy hooves squeezed him hard enough to make the armor creak under the pressure. In doing so she felt strangely... whole. Warm and fuzzy inside, Juniper the vampire pony smiled and buried her muzzle against the guard's chest.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch the magic!" the guard said, and Juniper let go with a wide, beaming smile. Had he truly meant that? No way!

"Do you... do you really mean that, Mister Monster?"

Our heroic, merciful guard stared straight ahead in complete silence. But he didn't need to say anything more. Juniper could see it in his empty gaze—he truly did mean everything he said. With a nod and a little grin permanently etched into her face, Juniper bid her new friend farewell and watched him turn and leave in the direction of the forest, happier than she'd been in a very long time.

A few minutes passed after he had disappeared. Juniper was a bit slow.

"GAH! THE MAYOR'S PLAN!" she screamed and leapt a tree's length up into the air. "I HAVE TO WARN HIM!"

***

"It's the town!" the goo pony mare said, as she and her slimy companion broke through the cover of the trees. The Hollow Shades day market was just setting up outside town, and a few of the day ponies had begun to set up shop as they walked up to the first few rows of stalls—eye wide open in case they spotted their guard friend.

"Anypony's seen a tall, armored non-pony creature around here?" the goo pony mare asked, while the worried toad watched on from atop her head. But alas! Pony after pony said the same. They'd all seen him, but nopony knew where he'd gone... Tired and with low spirits, the two brave heroes settled down on a quiet street corner to rethink their strategy over a small breakfast.

"I'm so sorry," the mare said, hooves wrapped around a jelly and jelly sandwich without bread—goo ponies are extremely sensitive to gluten, you see—eyes cast down. "I was so sure we'd find him, too!"

*Ribbit*

"You're right, at least we know he was here." A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. "Oh, you always know what to say to cheer me up!" She smooched the toad on its toady cheek, and took a big bite out of her sandwich.

"Want some?"

*Ribbit*

"Sure!" She smeared her jelly and jelly sandwich over the toad and let its toady skin absorb the nutrients, like you do.

*Ribbit*

"I know! It's my favorite, too!" Satisfied and ready for more action, our heroes stood and readied themselves to renew their search. But as they did so, a pony appeared from just beyond the street's end. It was a mare, but not just any mare, and the goo pony recognized her almost immediately. Juniper Fields, the mayor's assistant, trotted up the street with a look of determination on her that she'd never seen before.

"She's not wearing her bowtie!" the goo pony gasped, as the vampire mare walked past them, with a small entourage of ponies right behind her. They all looked like ponies on a mission, but what that mission was? Well, it couldn't be any good for them, surely.

*Ribbit*

And our toady friend was correct, in a way. Forces of darkness were arraying themselves in secrecy to unleash a battle the likes of which hadn't been seen in Hollow Shades since the age of Nightmare Moon. What they did not know, however, was just how great the magnitude of their struggle was becoming.

*Ribbit* our knight of slime and loyalty whispered at his friend, and the goo pony stared in disbelief.

"No, you can't leave me!" she said, eyes wide and heart breaking. "Please, your friend needs you. I need you..."

*Ribbit*

The toad leapt from the sidewalk to land next to a drain. He turned one last time to look at his friend's eyes, so full of sadness and tears. 'Please' the goo pony seemed to say, lips quivering. But for our toad the path ahead was clear and righteous. He knew what he must do.

*Ribbit* he promised, and with those poetic final words, he leapt into the drain and let the current carry him away.

Alone and distraught, the goo pony mare wept bitterly as storm clouds gathered over Hollow Shades' skies. A light drizzle began to fall and sizzle against her gooey body, and she knew she must seek refuge. But in that painful moment, she let the rain burn away at her goo and carry her slimy tears away, just like her friend had done. All alone and heartbroken, what was the point in carrying on?

She stomped the ground with a trembling hoof. No. She wouldn't let the pain hold her down. With her other hoof she wiped away the honey-like teardrops falling down her cheeks, and clenched her jaws. They had come so far together... and she knew he wouldn't abandon her. She knew he would fight to the last for his friends, and as certain as the goo must stick, she too was his friend and he was hers.

"I will see you again," she said in a whisper, under the heavy rainfall as thunder echoed above. "And when I do, no evil or storm will keep us apart. I promise, my brave amphibian prince. I swear."

With those words, the goo pony mare stood and turned in the direction Juniper had disappeared in. With narrowed eyes and a newfound purpose burning in her heart, the goo pony mare chased after her. If somepony knew what had happened to the guard, it would be her.

Author's Notes:

Got myself caught in a dimensional time rift, lads. Chapter may be coming in with a slight delay. Lots of love from Messina, Sicily, 1347 AD.