As Dr. McNinja's head was knocked backwards by a flying hoof, he reflected on how much he disliked pain. Indeed, among all the sensations and feelings in the universe, pain was probably Dr. McNinja's least favorite. Conventional wisdom claimed that which didn't kill you made you stronger, but Dr. McNinja knew that was complete and utter bullcrap. He was a doctor after all, and he knew science.

Dr. McNinja's head throbbed as he felt himself fall off the train. Naturally, it was at that moment that the train just happened to be crossing a gorge. In the nick of time, Dr. McNinja managed to grab hold of the train car roof with his free hand, so that instead of plummeting to his death he simply smacked his face into the glass window. Rainbow Dash, who had been slouching in her seat inside the train car, glanced at Dr. McNinja in surprise.

"Slouching is bad for your posture," Dr. McNinja said, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being smushed against the glass.

"Uh, do you need help?" Rainbow Dash asked.

Just as Dr. McNinja started to reply, he noticed one of the uniformed pegasi appear at the edge, a yellow mare with a fiery orange mane. Dr. McNinja looked at the pegasus, and she looked at Dr. McNinja. Then she tried to stomp on his fingers.

"Not the hand! Not the hand!" Dr. McNinja said frantically as he sheathed his sword and grabbed hold with his other hand. The other three pegasi appeared as well and proceeded to join in on the stomping. Dr. McNinja's hands quickly alternated with the gripping until he got tired of the threat to his digits and let go.

The reaction from Rainbow Dash was instantaneous. The cyan mare shot up from her seat and kicked the glass window pane hard. Unfortunately, the window pane was designed for emergency situations, so instead of shattering in a way that would have looked really cool, it simply popped out.

"Go limp! I'll catch you!" Rainbow Dash yelled at Dr. McNinja as she flew out the window and swooped down after him.

Dr. McNinja couldn't help but wonder if Rainbow Dash could actually catch him. Speed was clearly no issue, but he was a grown thirty-five year old man and Rainbow Dash was barely three feet tall. Regardless, the very next moment Dr. McNinja felt Rainbow Dash's forelegs under his armpits, and they were flying back up to the train. The orange maned pegasus spotted them and flew towards them to attack, but Dr. McNinja kicked her in the jaw.

"Spitfire?! What the hay?!" Rainbow Dash swore as the now unconscious mare dropped out of the sky and landed on top of the train.

"You know these pe— er, ponies?" Dr. McNinja asked as Rainbow Dash dropped him back atop the train.

"Uh, yeah, I do," Rainbow Dash replied. "They're the Wonderbolts. Really fast."

Before Dr. McNinja could ask for more details, one of the other Wonderbolts flew straight towards him. Dr. McNinja's arm shot out and caught the unfortunate flyer by the throat.

"There's fast," he said coolly, "and then there's ninja fast."

"Soarin!" Rainbow Dash cried out in alarm as Dr. McNinja knocked the stallion out with a punch.

The two remaining Wonderbolts launched themselves towards Dr. McNinja at the same time, one flying high and the other flying low. Dr. McNinja evaded by diving forward into a shoulder roll and popping back up to his feet behind them. Dr. McNinja placed a hand on the hilt of his short sword as the Wonderbolts veered around for another pass.

"Oh no," said Rainbow Dash when she saw Dr. McNinja grip his weapon. "Oh no no no no no no no—"

Dr. McNinja suddenly vaulted forward and slammed the hilt of his wakizashi against the head of one of the oncoming Wonderbolts as his foot lashed out and caught the other one behind the ear.

Dr. McNinja felt very awesome as he landed in a crouch on top the train car a split second before the two remaining Wonderbolts crashed onto the roof. Dr. McNinja considered offering Rainbow Dash a high-five as he stood up and sheathed his sword, but decided against it when he saw the crushed look on her face.

"Th- they... you... I... ca-can't... you..." Rainbow Dash said.

Dr. McNinja awkwardly scratched the back of his head, not entirely sure of what to say to her. He didn’t need a degree in psychology to tell that she was having difficulty processing what had just occurred. What do you say to someone who just witnessed the brutal beating up of someone they clearly idolized?

"Well!" He exclaimed as he clapped his hands together, deciding it would be best to simply move on. "That was exciting! Let's get them all back inside the train now, eh?"

"No doubt about it," Twilight Sparkle said after she had finished studying the four unconscious Wonderbolts tied up in the center of the train car. "They were being mind controlled. This Sparklelord character is certainly good with magic. It's going to take me a while to undo what he did."

"I don't think you have time, Twilight," Spike said as he pointed out the window. "Look."

Dr. McNinja looked towards where Spike was pointing, along with everyone else. Outside the window was Canterlot, in all its white, gold, and purple glory. Now that he was closer, Dr. McNinja could see that there were a few other colors mixed in as well, in the form of shops and the occasional medieval tent. The city would have looked rather nice if it weren't for two issues. First, it was completely abandoned. Second, the moon was now considerably closer, blocking out most of the sky from it's position directly above the mountain Canterlot rested on. The smiley face on the moon that Twilight Sparkle had spotted by telescope earlier was now easily visible, including a grin that was very unsettling given the circumstances.

"You know what? Forget it. I'm not getting off here," said one of the passengers as she stared out the window.

Dr. McNinja and company stepped off the train as every other passenger stayed on board, whispering amongst themselves and agreeing on the wisdom in remaining in the train car.

"That smiley face is so out of place, it isn't even funny," said Rarity, her eyes still locked on the moon.

"What will happen when it crashes into the mountain?" wondered Fluttershy.

"Nothing, because we're going to get the Elements of Harmony first and fix everything," Twilight Sparkle said firmly.

Gordito scowled. "I really hate how this entire plan hinges on the hope that Sparklelord may have given us a way past the magic door. What do we do if we can't get past it?"

"One step at a time, Gordito," Dr. McNinja said. "We'll worry about that once we get there. Twilight Sparkle, I trust you know the way to the castle?"

"Yes." Twilight Sparkle pointed a hoof. "It's right over... oh."

Dr. McNinja followed her gaze and saw the problem. Canterlot castle was within sight to the east, along with a shimmering rainbow colored force field surrounding it.

"Well, that's a problem," Gordito said flatly.

"How are we supposed to get to the Elements now?" Applejack wondered.

Not a word was spoken as Applejack's question sank in. Gradually, the sky darkened as the moon began to cover up the sun, ever so slowly approaching the land beneath and casting it further into shadow. One by one everyone looked at Dr. McNinja, clearly hoping for him to come up with some bright idea. It was at that moment in time that the ninja doctor felt a feeling he had never really felt before, one that bumped the feeling of pain to second place among his least favorite feelings of all time. Hopelessness.

"I don't know," said Dr. McNinja, scarcely able to believe the words coming out of his own mouth. "I just don't know."