On a bright morning (not that there was a lack of those in Equestria), I found myself at Fluttershy's cottage with Twilight, as well as some of Fluttershy's animal friends. The creatures were all rather excited, not that Fluttershy noticed.

"Now now friends," she said soothingly, "don't be afraid. Everything is going to be all right."

Suddenly, her facial expression changed and she turned to face a clearly shocked Twilight.

"So help me Twilight," she hissed, "if anything happens to them, you will answer to me. Got it?"

Twilight nodded nervously.

"Whoa, whoa!" I said, putting a hand between the two. "Don't worry, Fluttershy. Twilight knows what she's doing. Your animals will be fine, I promise. In fact, they seem pretty happy."

The animals must have understood me, since they cheered while Fluttershy changed back to her normal demeanour.

"Oh, okay." she said sheepishly. "I-if you say so."

Twilight mouthed a silent 'thank you' to me and spoke to Fluttershy.

"He's right," she said, "I do know what I'm doing, and I also promise that no harm will come to your friends. Just watch the trick. I'm sure you'll like it!"

Her horn glowed and the animals were slowly lifted off the ground, little cheers coming from them. Concentrating some more, Twilight arranged them into the shape of an infinite symbol, before making them fly around, while still maintaining that formation.

Needless to say, it was rather impressive. And soon, the animals were safely back on the ground, much to Fluttershy's immense relief. She had been holding her breath that much, she nearly blew me off when my feet when she let it out.

"See?" Twilight said with a somewhat smug tone "I told you they'd be fine. Princess Celestia has asked me to provide the entertainment for the delegates from Saddle Arabia. I just hope that it's good enough."

I laid a hand on her shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"They'd be mad not to." I said. "Princess Celestia wouldn't have asked you to do this if she knew you were incapable, Twi. You know how she thinks better than anypony."

She smiled... just as a blue blur crashed into her and knocked her onto her back. It soon became apparent that Rainbow Dash had pulled a Pinkie Pie and appeared out of nowhere.

"Twilight!" she yelled. "You've gotta come to Ponyville as quickly as you can! It's an emergency!"

Quick as a flash, Twilight had picked herself up from the ground. And soon she, Dash and I were rushing into town.

Right, I thought, what the fuck is it this time?

As we entered town, we soon became all too aware of the crowd which had gathered in the market square. Several of the townsponies were chattering amongst themselves, but one voice was much louder than the others... and it was Rarity's.

"You beast!" she cried in horror. "This shade of brown should only be used for accents!"

The crowd parted and Rarity made her way through, followed by Spike. She was wearing a gaudy brown dress which, if I'm honest, caused me to stifle a laugh.

"What's going on, Rarity?" asked Twilight.

"There's a unicorn in town who is using their magic to be downright horrible to everypony." Rarity wailed. "I tried to get them to stop, but they... well you can see for yourselves what they did! I must get into something more fashionable at once!"

She took off down the street as Spike watched her with a forlorn expression on his face.

"Who the hay does this punk think they are?!" snarled Dash.

"I don't know," Twilight replied, "but I intend to find out."

With my help, she gently pushed her way to the front of the crowd and soon we could see the unicorn of the moment. They were wearing a black cape which concealed everything but their horn.

"Who are you," Twilight demanded, "and what gives you the right to come here and harass us?!"

The unicorn chuckled.

"Revenge." the voice was female, and very angry. "Revenge against you, Twilight Sparkle."

With a flourish, the unicorn removed the hood of her cloak, revealing her face. Twilight gasped and narrowed her eyes.

"Trixie!" she snapped.

Dash suddenly flew into view.

"Trixie?" she snorted. "Oh my, is the Great and Powerful Trixie here to put on another show for us?"

Trixie growled and charged a spell. Suddenly, one of Dash's wings grew to a size disproportionate to her body. She flailed around for a while before plummeting to the ground, landing on top of Spark Plug, who grunted as he bore the brunt of the impact.

"Nopony will dare mock Trixie any more," Trixie yelled. "for Trixie's powers have grown far beyond those of even you, Twilight Sparkle! Trixie is here to get justice for how you humiliated her the last time she was in this backwater little town!"

I laughed.

"Do you refer to yourself in the third pony in an attempt to make yourself sound better," I said, "or do you have some sort of mental problem? I'm assuming it's the latter."

Trixie glared at me and turned her attention to a couple of colts who had pushed their way to the front of the crowd. I recognised them as Snips and Snails, mostly because of their cutie marks, but also because of the stories the Crusaders had told me.

"Trixie," Snips said ecstatically, "you're back!"

He and Snails bowed.

What the hell?

Trixie growled at them.

"Not you two again!" she said fiercely. "It is your fault Trixie was humiliated in the first place! And for that, you must be taught a lesson! Let's see how you like being humiliated!"

Her horn glowed again, enveloping the two foals in a blue aura. When it cleared, both of them were attached to the other by the horn, Snails now upside-down. They began flailing around as they tried to separate themselves while Trixie just cackled.

"Trixie," Twilight said pleadingly, "it's me you want, so please stop taking your anger out on other ponies!"

"You want Trixie to stop?" Trixie replied. "Trixie will not stop until she gets what she truly deserves!"

Her horn glowed again as she conjured a small screen. The display showed Twilight in an impressive display of magic, as she used her skills to lull what looked like a giant teddy bear to sleep.

"What the fuck is that?" I asked of my wife.

"It's an Ursa Minor." she replied. "The last time Trixie was here in Ponyville, she claimed to have defeated an Ursa Major all by herself. So Snips and Snails took it upon themselves to find one for her. Thankfully, they got this instead. Trixie admitted that she had been lying and ran off, leaving me to deal with it."

"Yes," Trixie interjected, "and it was humiliating! To be caught out like that ruined Trixie's reputation! Everywhere she went, ponies had heard about what had happened in Ponyville."

The screen changed again to show Trixie standing outside a wagon. A crudely drawn Ursa Minor had been painted on it, and a big red 'X' had been sprayed over the image of Trixie's cutie mark.

"Trixie's career was over." Trixie lamented. "Nopony wanted to give her the time of day. Everywhere Trixie went, ponies laughed and called her a fraud, a liar, a cheat!"

The screen changed for a second time, this time showing Trixie attempting to cast a teleportation spell in front of a crowd of ponies who were openly laughing at her.

Trixie growled at the bitter memories and changed the screen again. This one showed her chipping away at a rock with a pickaxe as sweat poured from her brow.

"In desperation, Trixie found herself working on a rock farm!" she shouted. "A rock farm! Trixie had reached the lowest rung of the ladder, and she knew that there was no going back."

A pink blur suddenly appeared in front of me, much to Trixie's surprise. Pinkie Pie stood in front of the showpony, a look of disgust on her face. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that Ace had arrived as well... and that he'd brought a few of his bots with him.

"You should be lucky that a rock farm would even consider hiring somepony as awful as you!" Pinkie yelled, as she angrily pointed a hoof at Trixie.

Trixie grimaced at the words for a moment before her horn lit up. Another flash of light... and Pinkie's mouth had been removed from her face and tossed into a conjured trash can.

"Your voice irritates Trixie," she huffed, "so she decided to do something about it."

Ace guffawed at the removal of his wife's mouth, much to Pinkie's dismay. He turned to face Trixie as his bots gathered around him.

"Trixie Lulamoon, by the power vested in me by Princess Celestia of Equestria, I'm placing you under arrest for several charges of assault and disturbing the peace." He drew his sidearm, as the squad of bots powered up their own weapons. "Come peacefully."

Trixie laughed arrogantly at him in response.

"You're arresting me?" Her eyes glowed red, and a shock-wave erupted across Ponyville. When the smoke cleared, every bot in range was down, without power, and unresponsive. "You and what army?" She asked.

Ace gasped, as he analysed the nearest bot. He sighed. "An electromagnetic pulse." He concluded. "Circuits are totally fried." He looked at his rifle and threw it to the ground, knowing that it was now useless. He turned to Trixie and drew a sword.

"Now I'm charging you with assaulting multiple officers of the law!" He shouted, as he got ready to charge. He dashed forward, ready to bring his sword down on the showy unicorn. "I'm gonna tear you limb from—"

His words we suddenly cut short as a blast of magic turned him to stone. He fell to the ground, stuck in his charging pose, his eyes a rock carving of fiery rage.

Pinkie tried to squeal in shock, but found that hard without a mouth. She settled for running over to Ace's statue and laying a hoof on it dejectedly.

Trixie blew at her horn and turned her attention back to Twilight, who was glaring at her fiercely.

"And now for you, Twilight." she said. "I challenge you to a magic duel to determine once and for all which of us is the better mare. The loser must leave Ponyville... forever!"

"No." Twilight replied defiantly.

Trixie simply sighed.

"Very well then," she said, "it is obvious to Trixie that she will just have to convince you to agree to her demands."

Trixie turned her gaze towards Spike, who gulped as her horn began to glow. He was enveloped in her aura and yelped as something happened to him. The aura faded and we gasped in shock as we realised that Spike had been compressed into the shape of a basketball, much to Rarity's horror.

Not content with merely transforming the poor dragon, Trixie then conjured a basketball hoop, and promptly slam-dunked Spike through it, causing him to bounce helplessly off the ground.

"Three points to Trixie!" she said smugly, before glaring at Twilight again. "Now will you accept Trixie's challenge?"

Twilight looked at Spike. Although he couldn't move his body, the look on his face was more than enough to tell her not to agree. She looked back to Trixie and shook her head defiantly.

Trixie muttered angrily to herself and tossed Spike aside as she put a hoof to her chin in thought. A wicked grin appeared on her face as her horn glowed once more. Summoning all her strength, she did what Twilight had done prior to the Crystal Empire incident — and levitated the entire library.

Twilight's jaw hung open as she watched Trixie pull off this feat of magical aptitude with little to no effort. Her jaw nearly hit the ground when Trixie flipped the building onto its side and began shaking it. A small avalanche of books poured out and landed on the ground.

I knew what was going to happen, but I was still surprised when it actually did.

"ENOUGH!" Twilight bellowed. "If it means that much to you, Trixie, then I accept your challenge!"

Trixie's grin widened, and the glow disappeared from her horn. The library, the books and Spike were all back to normal. Only Pinkie and Ace remained unchanged.

"Trixie has not reversed the spells she cast on you for two reasons." she sniffed. "One, she finds your voice annoying and two, she sees that human as a threat."

She clopped her forehooves together and laughed maniacally.

"Now, enough talk! The time for action has arrived! Take a good look at your beloved Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle! For this will be the last time you ever set eyes upon it!"

Her horn sparked to life, and a cartload of apples was lifted into the air and positioned over an Earth pony mare with a blue coat, periwinkle mane and a cutie mark depicting two interlocking horseshoes — one silver, one gold. She saw the cart hovering over her head and screamed.

"I've got it, Shoeshine!" Twilight yelled.

She took control of the cart from Trixie and set it down gently on the ground. Unfortunately, it had been a diversion — and now Trixie had conjured up six large pies, which she promptly threw in Twilight's direction.

Twilight sprung into action and conjured up a parasprite. The creature hungrily devoured the pies and burped up another one. Twilight quickly got rid of both of them. I was thankful — she had told me what happened the last time parasprites came to Ponyville.

Suddenly, Twilight was buried under a large pile of snow. Trixie giggled as she shook it off and fired off a bolt of magic. The spell hit Trixie in the muzzle... causing her to sprout a large black moustache, much to our amusement.

"Way to give her number twenty-five!" Spike cheered.

Trixie gasped and conjured a pair of scissors, which were promptly used to remove her new facial hair.

"You should have kept it!" I yelled. "You could have made a career out of being 'The Moustachioed Mare'!"

Trixie ignored my comments and stomped a hoof into the ground.

"Snips, Snails!" she barked. "Come to Trixie... now!"

The two colts rushed to her side and bowed. Without warning, Trixie summoned a ribbon of red magic which lifted them both into the air as it covered their bodies. They fell back to earth with a bump... but now Snips was a foal, and Snails was an elderly stallion.

Everyone gasped.

"I-I-I don't believe it!" Twilight stuttered. "Only the highest level unicorns are capable of performing age spells!"

She charged up her own spell and enveloped Snips and Snails in her purple aura. The two of them were lifted into the air as she attempted to reverse what Trixie had done.

The spell faded as Twilight fell to the ground, panting and exhausted. She slowly stood up, only to find herself face-to-face with Trixie, who simply grinned.

"Well, well." she said mockingly. "It would seem that Trixie has won. And you know what that means!"

Before Twilight could respond, Trixie had grabbed her in her magic and thrown her across town.

"Whoa, shit!" I yelled, as I raced over to try and catch her. I managed to do so but only barely, the impact knocking me onto the ground in a dazed heap.

Trixie trotted over.

"Consider yourself banished from Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle!" she yelled. "Trixie doesn't want you anywhere near her town again!"

She pointed a hoof at me.

"The fact you ran after Twilight tells Trixie that you care about her. And looking at that necklace you're wearing, Trixie must be right. So, you're banished from town as well."

"Fine by me." I snarled. "I'd hate to stick around out of fear of what I might do to you should I get my hands around your slimy neck."

"Trixie is not afraid of you." she said. "Trixie has just defeated Twilight Sparkle, supposedly the most powerful unicorn Equestria has ever seen! Just go, both of you."

I got to my feet and helped Twilight up. The look on her face was one of doubt.

"Twilight!" Spike's voice rang out. "Wait for me!"

Spike ran as fast as he could, but he was too slow. Trixie summoned a large glass dome, which she put in place around the town, preventing anyone from entering... or leaving. Spike stopped dead in his tracks and gazed mournfully through the dome. He placed a hand on it, which Twilight returned with a hoof.

"I'll be okay, Spike." she said. "Just keep an eye on Azure and Evening for me. That magical blast from earlier will no doubt have disabled the Nurse-bots Ace loaned to me. So please, take care of the foals for me."

Spike nodded and turned away, heading back towards the library. Trixie simply snorted and turned to face the townsponies. She began shouting orders at them as Twilight and I left.

Once we were far enough away, we turned and looked back at the town that had been our home.

And then we wept.

I followed Twilight as we walked along a path which was winding its way through the dark and forbidding Everfree Forest. She seemed focused on getting somewhere and given that I trust her impeccably, I followed along.

She soon sighed with relief and I saw that there was a building in front of us. Smoke billowing out of a makeshift chimney indicated that there was somepony inside. Twilight walked up the path, but I stayed back, apprehensive of what we were walking into.

"It's okay Geo," Twilight said, "this is where Zecora lives. She's a friend of mine."

I nodded and followed her up the path. She knocked on the door a couple of times and then we waited. Soon, the sound of hoofsteps reached our ears and the door opened to reveal a zebra. She was a little bit taller than Twilight, and was adorned with what looked like tribal piercings.

"Twilight Sparkle, it has been a while." she said. "Your visit today has made me smile."

Then she saw me.

"Whispers of your kind I have been told." she said. "To see that they are true is a sight to behold."

"Hello, Zecora." I offered. "My name is Geo, and I am Twilight's husband. We come to you now because... well, long story short... we need your help."

Zecora nodded.

"Tell me everything and I will help how I can." she replied. "I aim to help my friends all, be they pony... or man."

We went inside and sat around a large cauldron, filled with a bubbling green liquid.

Once we were comfortable, Twilight told Zecora everything.

"... and that's the story." Twilight finished. "Trixie has grown far too powerful, and I fear that her magic will destroy Ponyville if left unchecked. Please Zecora, can you help me?"

Zecora stood up and walked over to Twilight. She laid a hoof on her shoulder and nodded firmly.

"Follow me now, and we shall begin." she said. "And the next time you duel her, you will certainly win."

Twilight smiled and stood up, following Zecora outside. I soon got up and joined them, because I didn't want to be left alone...

... and the decorations in Zecora's hut were creeping me out.

The town of Ponyville was cut off from the rest of Equestria due to Trixie's dome. Inside, the rain fell in buckets and the wind howled relentlessly. In the centre of town, Ace remained encased in stone and now resembled a statue instead of a man.

In the Town Hall, a single raised voice could be heard giving orders to the many ponies inside, as Trixie cemented her hold on the town.

"Hurry up with Trixie's banners!" she demanded of Rarity, who was at a sewing machine making banners depicting Trixie's grinning face. The device was producing them at such a rate, it appeared to be on the verge of catching fire. As Rarity finished another one she handed it to Rainbow Dash, who flew up into the rafters looking for a place to hang it.

Trixie turned her attention towards the Cakes, who were making a large seat out of candy.

"Trixie's throne had better be finished soon," she snarled, "or else there will be Tartarus to pay! Trixie's current seat is far too lumpy for her liking."

"You're not the only one who isn't comfortable, bitch." John muttered from underneath Trixie's rear. "Has anyone ever told you that your flank is really bony? It feels someone is poking me with a fucking pitchfork."

Trixie smacked him across the back of the head in response and adjusted the necklace she was wearing. She then looked towards Applejack, who was knee-deep in a barrel of apples.

"Trixie has been waiting far too long for you to finish pressing that applesauce! She demands that you hurry up, so that she may enjoy an applesauce facial."

"You need a facial, all right." John muttered. "And I don't mean the beauty kind either. Perhaps it'll improve your attitude."

Trixie gasped and smacked him again as Applejack stopped stomping the apples.

"Ah ain't doin' this any more!" she yelled. "Ya can do what ya want ta me, but Ah refuse ta listen ta yer crazy orders any more!"

Trixie raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really?" she mused. "Then perhaps this will change your mind!"

Her horn glowed and two large feathers appeared out of thin air. Trixie promptly ran the two of them along Applejack's side, prompting her to burst out laughing.

"Ah, no!" she squealed. "Not the— ah ha ha ha ha ha! No, stop it!... all right, all right! Ah'll git back ta work!"

The feathers disappeared and Applejack let out a sigh of relief, before reluctantly going back to stomping on the apples. She was so caught up in her work, she failed to notice the huge grin on John's face.

Now I know what to do the next time she says no to me...

Trixie grinned at her work and looked around the room. She caught sight of Pinkie Pie, who was dancing half-heartedly as she looked out of the window into town square, where Ace's statue remained.

Don't worry Acey, she thought, I'll get you out of there soon...

"DANCE FASTER!" Trixie yelled.

Pinkie stopped and glared at Trixie furiously.

"Mmpph mmmph mmmm mmmph?!" she mumbled.

Trixie sighed.

"You're not getting your mouth back, so stop asking!" she snapped. "Now start dancing, or Trixie will see to it that you suffer the same fate as your human friend out there!"

Pinkie's eyes shrunk to pinpricks as she began dancing for all that she was worth. Trixie laughed at her antics and continued watching over her slaves.

"Trixie's magic has ruined poor Ponyville." Rarity lamented, as she threaded a needle. "I hope Twilight is able to fix this mess."

The needle was enveloped in a red aura and yanked from Rarity's grip. She gasped and then yelped in agony as the point was stabbed into her hoof.

"Ow!" she squealed.

"Trixie does not wish to hear any mention of Twilight Sparkle!" the demented unicorn yelled. "Instead, she wants... neigh, demands... that you continue making more banners!"

Rarity looked at her sore hoof and let out a sniffle. A small cough got her attention, and she looked down to see Spike standing in front of her. He took her hoof in his hands and kissed it.

"Any better?" he asked.

Rarity smiled and gave him a peck on the nose.

"Much better." she replied. "Thank you, darling."

Suddenly, Spike was enveloped in a flash of light. When it cleared, he found himself in a cage suspended from the ceiling. Trixie's mocking laughter then filled the room.

"Trixie didn't realise that a pony and a dragon could be together." she said. "So if you want him out of there, you will do as Trixie commands, got it?!"

Rarity sighed and went back to her work. As she made yet more banners, she would occasionally look up at Spike in his cage and blow him a kiss, which he would return eagerly.

Come on Twilight. Ponyville needs you...

I sat and watched as Twilight stood in the middle of a pool of water while balancing on one leg. Her eyes were closed, and her horn was glowing intently as she levitated three small spheres of the stuff around her.

Zecora stood nearby, also balancing on one leg.

"No noise, no sound, no din, no fuss, must interfere with your focus." she said. "Unlearn what you have learned, only then can victory be earned."

The temptation to repeat this in my best Yoda voice was immense, but I resisted. Then again, everything I was looking at reminded me of the X-wing scene in Star Wars. I half expected Zecora to whip out a lightsaber and tell Twilight to simply cut Trixie in half.

Hey, there's an idea...

"I can't... stop thinking about... how she managed to beat me." Twilight said, her concentration wavering. "And I can't... imagine what... she's doing to our friends... or my children."

Her eyes snapped open.

"The children!" she yelled. "Trixie might be doing Celestia-knows-what to them!"

Her concentration broke and she fell into the pool below. I quickly jumped in and dragged her out.

"Trixie may be a bitch," I said, "but I don't think she'd harm foals."

"Look at what she did to Snips and Snails when she saw them earlier." Twilight replied.

"... fair point." I said. "In that case, you'd better start concentrating. You can do this, Twi. I know you can."

I punctuated this by bringing her in for a kiss, which she returned with just as much passion and fervour. Had Zecora not coughed and distracted us... well, you can probably imagine what might have happened next.

"Clear your head, and try again." Zecora said. "Just try not to cause yourself any pain."

Twilight nodded and got back in position over the lake. Soon, she was deep in concentration, and her lessons were continuing.

Hell, even I learned a lesson that day. Never take off your wet shirt in front of your wife when she's trying to do something as important as this.

... it's just distracting.

The door to the library swung open and a crowd entered. Several ponies, a dragon and a human collapsed onto the floor in a tired heap. Spike was the first to crawl to his feet. Walking over to John, he poked him in the side.

"Ugh, what?" John groaned.

"I need to check on Azure and Evening." Spike replied. "Can you give me a hand?"

John nodded and stood up, following Spike upstairs.

"While they're doing that," Rarity said, "I suggest that the rest of us look through these books and find one that can offer some help as to how we can teach Trixie a lesson."

"It's a pity Geo isn't here." Dash muttered. "Give him a few minutes and the book we need would fall right on top of his head."

The group chuckled as John and Spike came downstairs, John holding Azure and Spike holding Evening. Both of them had crestfallen looks on their faces. Applejack noticed and spoke up, her voice full of concern.

"What's wrong, guys?" she asked. "... there ain't nothin' wrong with those two, is there?"

"Far from it." John replied, as he and Spike both held up the foal they were carrying.

Azure and Evening looked at the many faces staring back, goofy smiles appearing on their small faces.

"... Mama? Papa?" they asked together.

A stunned silence soon followed.

"Oh Celestia..." Rarity said, "... their first words!"

"Yeah..." John replied, "... and their parents missed it. They are gonna be pissed when they find out."

He paused for a moment.

"... a hundred bits says that Geo tries to kill Trixie."

Everyone simply raised an eyebrow at him.

"Never mind." he said, setting Azure into the carry cot lying on the couch. His sister soon joined him, and the two fell asleep, completely oblivious to the anguish in the room.

"Rarity is right." Spike said. "There's gotta be a book in here somewhere that can help us. Trixie seemed rather keen to keep that necklace she was wearing on. I certainly don't remember her wearing it the last time she was in town. Maybe it is the key?"

Everyone nodded and picked a shelf to look through. The room soon filled with the faint sound of turning pages, intermixed with the occasional sigh. However, in one corner of the room, Fluttershy and Doctor Haywick seemed to have taken a keen interest in a particular book.

"Doesn't this look like the amulet Trixie is wearing?" Fluttershy asked meekly, pointing to the picture.

Haywick studied it for a moment before nodding.

"It does, as it happens." he replied. "We'd better tell the others."

Fluttershy coughed weakly.

"Umm, I think we've found something." she said quietly. Naturally, there was no response.

"Allow me, my dear." Haywick offered, before raising his voice slightly. "Fluttershy has found something!"

Almost immediately, everyone stopped what they were doing and gathered around the two. Fluttershy let out a squeak and hid behind her mane. Haywick laughed and took the book from her, poking the page with a hoof.

"The Alicorn Amulet." he said simply. "Wearing it grants a pony untold magical prowess, but makes them corrupt and evil the longer they do so. The only way to stop it is to take it off—"

"Well what are we waiting for?" John snarled. "I'll hold the bitch down while the rest of you rip her head off to get the thing."

Haywick glared at him.

"Let me finish." he snapped. "Only the pony who wears it is able to take it off... so with that said I think we're done for. Trixie will never agree to remove it, regardless of what it does to her."

"We need to let Twilight and Geo know." Spike said. "I'm pretty sure they'll be at Zecora's place. Her hut is the only habitation in the area, since they can't get to Canterlot."

"Why can't we send a letter to Princess Luna?" Spark Plug said. "Princess Celestia is away, but Luna isn't. I'm pretty sure she could get Trixie to take the amulet off."

"I can't." Spike replied. "Sending a letter to a Princess uses a different spell for each of them, but I only know the one for Princess Celestia. But since she's in Saddle Arabia right now, it would be pointless."

Spark groaned.

"So somepony is gonna have to go into the Everfree and find Zecora?" he asked. "Sorry, but count me out."

"I know somepony who's got the goods to get into that forest!" Rainbow Dash said proudly. "Fluttershy!"

She pointed a hoof at the timid pegasus, who gasped.

"Whaaaaaaat?!" she squealed. "B-but why me?"

"Because you're the one who is good with animals!" Dash replied. "They can help you sneak out of town and into the Forest. Then you can go to Zecora's, tell Twilight about the Amulet, and then be back before Trixie even realises you've gone!"

"I-I can't!..." Fluttershy protested. "B-but maybe I should. After all, I wouldn't want to let anypony down..."

Haywick put a forehoof around her neck comfortingly.

"If anypony can do it," he said softly, "it's you. You are the bravest pony I've ever met. You stood up to a dragon, so the Everfree Forest should be foals play! I have complete confidence in your ability to see this through to the end."

Fluttershy simpered and nuzzled his cheek.

"Okay, I'll do it." she said.

Snips and Snails groaned as they pulled a large wooden sleigh around the perimeter of Trixie's dome, the self-proclaimed overlord riding on top. She produced a large whip and cracked it in the air, eliciting a gasp of fear from both colts.

"It would be easier... to pull this..." Snips grunted, "... if it had wheels, oh Great and Powerful one."

"The Great and Powerful Trixie doesn't trust wheels." she replied. "Now shut up and keep pulling!"

She cracked the whip again to get her point across.

A dull thumping noise filled the air. Trixie looked around for the source of the sound, and saw a trio of beavers attacking her dome with their tails.

"What is the meaning of this?" she yelled.

One of the beavers began chattering angrily, pointing emphatically towards a nearby log.

Realising what the beaver was getting at, Trixie's horn sparked to life as she slightly raised the dome. The beavers dragged the log through, and the dome came down again.

"There." Trixie said. "You have your log. Now get out of here."

The beavers replied with another chorus of chatters which could have been translated as something rude. Trixie rolled her eyes as they left, before transforming her sleigh into a giant golden bed.

"Pull me back to the town square, pronto!" she proclaimed.

Snips and Snails groaned and began the laborious task set before them. Trixie cracked the whip, unaware of the beavers watching her from behind the log.

As she got out of sight, one of the beavers gave a thumbs up. The other two reached inside the log, pulling out Fluttershy, who was dressed as a rabbit.

"Oh... I don't want to be here." she said, forgetting everything Haywick had said to her earlier. "If I'm going to be scared, it might as well be at home. In my closet. With a teddy bear."

Facing away from the Everfree, she took a step towards Ponyville. Suddenly half a dozen birds grabbed a hold of her costume and dragged her into the forest, Fluttershy's terrified squealing soon fading into a grim silence.

Fluttershy produced a book from her saddlebags and placed it on the table. Twilight picked it up and began reading.

"So the key to Trixie's powers is this amulet?" she said. "Interesting... but how are we supposed to get it off her?"

Fluttershy shrugged.

"Oh well," I said, "it looks like it's time for a brainstorming session."

Twilight squealed with glee.

"Oh, I love those!" she said. "Ooh, let's make this one an all-nighter, and see who can come up with the best idea."

"Sounds good to me." I said with a grin. "You know I always look forward to our all-night 'sessions'."

Twilight's cheeks turned a delightful shade of crimson as Zecora cleared her throat.

"To beat this foe, you don't need tricks." she said. "You have something else... why not use the six?"

Twilight furrowed her brow as she worked out the meaning of Zecora's words in her head before she let out a gasp.

"Of course!" she said. "Zecora, you're a genius!"

She took up a quill and began scribbling furiously on a piece of parchment which Fluttershy had brought.

"When I'm done with this letter Fluttershy, I want you to take this back to Ponyville." she said. "Because I've got an idea..."

Fluttershy simply nodded as Twilight continued writing.

Whatever her plan was, I was sincerely hoping that it worked.

A few hours passed and I found myself back in Ponyville. Well, the outskirts at least, given that Trixie's damned dome was still there. Twilight and Zecora were with me as well, the former with a smug grin on her face and wearing a necklace.

"Trixie!" she yelled in an almost sing-song fashion. "Come out, Trixie! It's time for round two!"

Trixie approached the dome wearing a grin similar in size to Twilight's. She sneered as she got within talking distance.

"Trixie has already beaten you once," she gloated, "so she has no need to do it again."

"Ah, but that's only because you've got the Alicorn Amulet." Twilight retorted. "So to even the odds I went out and got my own amulet of incredible power, as you can see."

She puffed her chest out so that Trixie could get a look at the thing around her neck.

"This amulet comes from beyond the Everfree, and is far more powerful than the boring old Alicorn Amulet could ever be." Twilight said, before glaring at Trixie. "So what do you say, Trixie? Shall we have a rematch?"

The dome disappeared with a poof as Trixie stepped forward. The spectacle had attracted a large crowd, all of whom seemed keen to witness the duel.

"Very well, Twilight Sparkle." Trixie said. "Trixie will defeat you again, and take your amulet for her own!"

"We'll see about that." Twilight snorted. "Snips, Snails!"

The two of them stepped forward timidly.

"Uhh, yes Twilight?" Snips asked.

Twilight's horn glowed, surrounding both colts in a puff of smoke. When it cleared, two foals were in their place — two foals who promptly started crying.

Trixie's mouth hung open as Twilight polished a forehoof against her chest and held it out in front of her.

"That was just for starters." she said, letting out a sarcastic yawn. "Oh Rarity, Applejack!"

The two mares stepped forward. Once again, Twilight's horn glowed and the smoke surrounded both her friends. When it cleared, Rarity had become a filly, while Applejack had become elderly.

"As you can see Trixie," she said smugly, "this amulet has vastly increased my magical powers."

Her horn glowed again, and suddenly Rainbow Dash found herself looking at her duplicate. The two Dashes mirrored each others shocked facial expressions, as Spark Plug fought valiantly to control his urge to drool.

"And for my next trick..." Twilight said. Another bolt of magic and Pinkie Pie was now a one-pony band, playing ten instruments at once. If she still had her mouth, she would have been grinning.

"Ooh, I'm enjoying this." Twilight said, as she suddenly turned her attention towards Applejack again. "How about I turn a mare... into a stallion?"

Applejack gasped and tried to flee, but was lifted into the air by Twilight's magical aura. Another flash and sure enough... Applejack was now a stallion.

"Eeyup." she (he?) said timidly.

"What the fuck?!" John roared. "You'd better change her back, Twilight because I don't swing that way!... not that I've got anything against anypony who does, of course."

Twilight obliged and soon Applejack was back to normal.

"Hoo boy, that felt mighty strange." she muttered as she picked herself up from the ground.

Twilight smiled and turned to face Trixie.

... who wasn't there. Suddenly, Twilight felt a hoof around her neck as somepony grabbed her amulet.

"Ha! Trixie told you she would get your amulet!" she cackled. She removed the Alicorn Amulet and tossed it to the ground, where one of the Dash clones picked it up. "And now she shall defeat you again, and banish you from Equestria itself!"

She puffed her chest out and closed her eyes.

Nothing happened. Trixie looked at the amulet and then to Twilight, who's grin was threatening to consume her face.

"Oh, Trixie." she said with a chuckle. "That amulet you have there?... yeah, it's worthless. In fact, it's one of Zecora's doorstops. You fell for our little plan just like I knew you would."

"P-plan?" Trixie asked.

"Would you like to know how we did it?" Twilight asked. "... well I'm going to tell you anyway, whether you want me to or not."

She cleared her throat and took a deep breath.

"Fluttershy managed to get out of town and came to me with details of the Alicorn Amulet. We knew that we couldn't get it off you, and that you had to be the one to remove it. So, we hatched a plan. If I could show you that I had an amulet and make you believe it was more powerful than yours, I knew that you would want to take it."

Trixie didn't reply, so Twilight continued talking.

"I used the magic of friendship, Trixie. We painted Applejack's brother to look like her so that you would think I turned her into a stallion. Granny Smith played AJ as an elderly mare while Sweetie Belle assumed the role of her sister as a filly. Fluttershy made an ideal clone of Rainbow Dash, while my own two foals assumed the roles of a young Snips and Snails."

"B-but what about the pony with ten instruments?" Trixie asked. "What kind of magic was that?"

"That's just one of Pinkie's many talents." Twilight replied. "Nothing magical about it at all. And all of my 'tricks' were merely simple illusions. Everypony hid behind that statue and came out when I laid down a smoke screen for them."

Trixie tried to respond, but instead began to cry. She removed the doorstop from around her neck and slunk away, avoiding the many eyes upon her. As she left, a round of applause broke out from the crowd of townsponies.

"I knew you could do it, Twi!" I said, scooping her into my arms for a hug. "You showed her what for!"

Twilight smiled and nuzzled me affectionately.

"Thanks." she replied. "Now come on, Princess Celestia and the delegates from Saddle Arabia will be here soon."

"Do you think Trixie has learned her lesson this time?" I asked.

Twilight sighed.

"I hope so..." she said, "... I hope so."

"Oohs" and "Ahhs" came from the crowd as Twilight once again flew Fluttershy's animals in the shape of an infinite symbol. I could see Princess Celestia, along with whom I assumed to be the delegates, watching with wonder on their faces.

However, I wasn't focusing on the performance. I was still pissed off with Trixie for putting us through the crap she did. Everypony else seemed ready to forgive her, saying that it was the Alicorn Amulet which made her act the way she did. What those fools seemed to forget was the fact that Trixie put the Amulet on of her own free will. So I for one wasn't willing to forgive and forget.

As Twilight set the animals down to a gentle applause, fireworks filled the sky. I looked down to see Trixie letting them off. I clenched my fist and approached her, ready to give her another ear-bashing... and if I'm honest, I wanted to do that both figuratively and literally.

However, Twilight got to her first. I stood with my arms folded, giving her the best evils I could muster.

"Thanks for the fireworks, Trixie." Twilight said. "It was a nice touch for my act. Everypony liked it.."

"It was the least Trixie could do after being so mean to you and your friends." Trixie replied. "In fact, Trixie wants to offer her most sincere apologies for her behaviour."

"Fuck you." I snapped. "You made my friends suffer, and you tore my wife and I away from our children. If you really think that I'm just going to forgive you that easily, you're even more deluded than I originally thought."

Twilight glared at me.

"So you're just going to hold a grudge, is that it?" she asked sternly. "Aren't you forgetting what happened to the last person you knew to hold a grudge?"

I thought about it for a moment before I realised what... and who... she was talking about.

"Derek..." I said. "He held a grudge against me for sending him to jail... and I ended up killing him when he acted on it."

"Which in turn got you taken away from our children on and off for three months." Twilight replied. "And you're angry over one day away from them because of Trixie?"

She's got a point.

"You're right, Twi." I said. "I'm sorry."

I turned to face Trixie.

"She's right. It's not right to hold a grudge against somepony. So, if my lovely wife is willing to forgive you, I guess I can as well."

I held a hand out and Trixie shook it.

"Thank you." she said softly. "Isn't the Great and Apologetic Trixie the most magnificent and humble pony you have ever seen? However, Trixie thinks that she has outstayed her welcome, and must leave. But she has learned a lot from this whole mess, and promises to better herself in the eyes of others."

Twilight smiled and nodded as Trixie ran off. She tripped over a rock and fell on her face, but continued running as if nothing had happened. As Twilight and I stood there, Pinkie approached, still minus her mouth.

"Mmmmpppphhhhhh!" she yelled after Trixie.

"Let me fix that for you, Pinkie." Twilight laughed.

A quick flash, and Pinkie had her mouth back. She squealed in delight and hugged Twilight firmly.

"Thanks, Twilight!" she said. "Oh, it feels so good to be able to talk again! I enjoy charades, but having to use it to try and talk was no fun at all!"

She continued babbling as Princess Celestia approached. Twilight and I bowed to her.

"I just wanted to congratulate you on your performance, Twilight." she said. "And I would also like to know... who built that statue of Ace in town square?"

Pinkie gasped in shock.

"She didn't change Acey back?!" she yelled.

She produced a large hammer out of thin air and ran towards the statue. Twilight, Celestia and I followed her and arrived just as she brought the hammer down, shattering the stone and freeing Ace.

"Oh, my head." he groaned. "I feel like I just got stoned and hammered. What the heck happened?"

"That's a good question." Celestia replied.

"It's a long story." I said, as Spike and John arrived with Azure and Evening. "Hey, there's my two favourite kids!"

I picked them both up and cuddled them, much to their delight. Twilight giggled at my antics.

"Mama and Papa!"

Twilight and I froze.

"Did they just..." I asked, shocked.

"They did!" Twilight squealed. "Their first words!"

We then set the two of them down and began teaching them new words, just like any proud parents would do.

"Should we tell them that they've been speaking all day?" Spike asked, as he watched Geo and Twilight attempt to have a communication with their children.

John shook his head.

"No, let's not spoil the moment." he replied. "After all, they need something to take their minds off the day they've had."

Spike nodded, and the two of them watched in silence.

Author's Notes:

FUN FACT: This chapter is 36 pages long (using 14-point Verdana).

The next chapter will be another made up one, similar to Chapter Five. It will be set during Sleepless In Ponyville and focus on what John, Spike and Spark Plug were doing while their respective wife/marefriend was away camping.