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Nightmares In Paradise

by fred2266

First published

PONIES. YAY. PLUS WRESTLERS. Huh? Well crap....The plot sounded good enough to me!

Equestria has been plagued by some of the most devious do-badders in the history of do-badderism, Discord, Nightmare Moon, Chrysalis, and among others. All were defeated by the illustrious ponies collectively known as, "The Mane 6." After their newest plethora of enemies succumb to failure, (With the help of some....Special friends) Ponyville is once again invaded by Outsiders. Most mean no harm, except for one certain Purple pest.....Can Equestria be saved, or will the Nightmare, overcome the Paradise?
(My first real fanfiction. Flame if you must....I'll just shrink back into my shell....)

The Beginning of The End of The Rest of Your Sanity

*This story, and everyone contained in it, except for a few are the owned properties of the World Wrestling Entertainment, Valve, and Hasbro Productions. This story has been written for the intent of entertainment only. None of the parties involved have allowed me to use their characters, but I bet my bottom vagina lip that they don’t mind, so I thank them, I need my vagina lips, after all.*

*This story takes place after a certain fanfiction, "Walking Nightmares" by KnightMysterio. References in this fanfiction will be made, highlighting some major moments from the fanfiction. If you do not like spoilers, and want to expand your favorites on this website, I suggest you read that story first, then read mine, it’s a fucking AWESOME piece of literature, although I don’t think it’s on fimfiction, it IS on fanfiction.net, thought, so read it there. I am not the owner of said story, all credit goes to KnightMysterio.*

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Equestria......

Canterlot.....

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The day was just about to end. Night was falling quickly over Equestria. Princess Luna and Princess Celestia stood on the balcony of their impressively massive Canterlot Castle. It was a house fit for royalty, and that is what the two Princesses are, Royalty in the deepest form. The two princesses looked on as the sun waned down, it would soon be time for Princess Luna to use her magic to set the moon. Princess Luna wasn't very good at setting up day, that was her sister's job, anyway.

"So," Said Luna. "Would you like to try to set moon once again, dear sister?" Luna had always wanted to see how her sister could fare in setting down the moon.

"I don't know...." Answered a worried Celestia. "Wouldn't that curse the process? You are the Moon Princess, and I am the Sun Princess.....It just, doesn't seem right."

Luna nodded. "Fair enough. I shall see you soon, then." The indigo colored princess then used her wings, flying out to where the almost dead sun was.

Princess Celestia did something she stopped doing altogether since a couple of weeks ago, she smiled.....Her star pupil, Twilight Sparkle, and all of her friends, including the outsiders from another Dimension, Team BLU they were called, had stopped numerous foes, including two known only as "Masky Earth Pony", and "Masky Unicorn Pony". They had also stopped a group of viscous Diamond Dogs, and their eviler counterparts, the Nightmare Dogs, a former zompony named Gray Hoof sapped all Ponyville residents of their life, in return for his own to be resurfaced, Doctor Whooves and his bow-tie turned evil, the hardest of all the masky ponies was the Pegasus, but he was still disposed of, nontheless. Finally, the toughest task came when a headless Pony named Slendermane came to town. It took everything they had, but in the end, Slendermane was defeated, and Ponyville, and all of Equestria, was safe.

Celestia was just happy it was all over, her sister's nightmares stopped, and so did everyone else's. Just today, she and her sister had attended the Town Hall meeting, thanking Twilight, for her use of Magic during two of the hardest fights, including creating the force field in the battle with Nightmare Doctor, and creating a source of energy, which slowly but surely kept the traumatized child ponies safe. Rarity was also thanked for her magic, which she didn't use much of, but she played the biggest role (Along with Engineer) in the battle against Nightmare Doctor, laying down sentries as fast as EngiRarity could go, ultimately defeating the crazed Doctor and turning him back to normal. Applejack played the biggest role (Along with Demoman), in defeating Nightmare Grave. The two combined to become AppleDemo, blasting more than enough grenades to send Nightmare Grave back to the dead side. Fluttershy mostly cowered during all these battles, but she managed to merge with Heavy and retreat the Masky Earth Pony. Pinkie Pie probably did the least damage during all of this, but her Party Cannon would always surprise the evil-doers in the heat of battle, and, even though she was blinded during much of it, Rainbow Dash still received credit for her bravery to do all she could while being at such a disadvantage. Even some non-lesser Ponies got medals of Harmony like everyone else. Trixie got one for returning in the nick of time to cast illusions on Nightmare Doctor, and also fueling the fire to create the energy source that probably saved many of Ponyville's little Colts and Fillies. Zecora created a potion that had stunned Nightmare Doctor for a while, stopping his destruction, and ultimately leading to his defeat. The newly reborn Mitta was perhaps the reason Gray Hoof even came to Ponyville, but that didn't stop her from getting revenge on him for killing her sister. Mitta warned Applejack and Demoman of Gray Hoof's arrival, and as seen, if those two wouldn't have showed up, Nightmare Grave may have reined Supreme. Fluttershy's mother, Barricade was one of the sources of power on this super team. She caused a distraction to Nightmare Doctor, which caused Soldier to tackle him, which soon lead him down the road to being defeated. And finally, little Spike received a Medal for being the very best Assistant he could be.

But, the Mane 6 and friends couldn't have saved Equestria without the help of 9 unknowns. Team BLU. They came to Ponyville on some technicality, but they are not the average Mercenary, they proved they were just run of the mill guys, who just happened to be professional killers. This most certainly helped. Without them, Equestria would be in ruins. Heavy used his large frame to mow down numerous enemies during the battles, and his merger with Fluttershy caused victory against Masky Earth Pony. Soldier had a bit of an outburst with his PAINis Cupcake episode, but he used his keen, cerebral tactics to cause a big dent in the battle against Nightmare Doctor. He also, right before he left, was voted Favorite Teacher by the Colts and Fillies at Ponyville Elementary, although he was strict, the children respected and obeyed what he said, while Soldier also gave them some very good advice. Scout was a bit tedious at first glance of Ponyville, he thought the names everyone had were too girlish. But as seen, he got used to Ponyville by being, well, Scout....He caused a bit of controversy with some of his antics, though. So before he left, he apologized to everyone for being a bit of a dick, which everyone accepted, even Barricade. Scout was good on defense in the battles, bonking everyone unsuspectingly, like a damn gnat. Which works for him, and it works for everyone else, too. Sniper brought it straight to all the Enemies, well, even if he was on a cloud while doing it. Nobody saw his thunderbolts coming from a mile away, being stunned with each dropped Hoof. Pyro did what came naturally, she burned everything that would burn her back, making her one of the bravest Members of the BLU Team, she also received a Gem encrusted bow from Rarity, because let's face it....There's NO WAY the bow Fluttershy gave Pyro is lasting one minute out on the battlefield. Medic was without a doubt, the most important member of Team BLU during these battles. He healed the wounded, ALL of them. That's powerful stuff, ponies would die without him. I wonder how that makes him feel. Spy was known for just like while in Battle, sneaking behind his Enemy's lines. He backstabbed Nightmare Doctor numerous times, which softened him up for EngiRarity. Engineer makes buildings all day every day, whether they be giant Headquarters, or tiny Sentries, he is the builder of the group. He and Rarity were the biggest reason Nightmare Doctor was destroyed. How can he put those damn things down so fast?! And last, but not least, Demoman along with Applejack was crucial during the battle with Nightmare Grave, when they merged together, it was pretty much over....You'd think he'd be worthless since he's always drunk, but he proves that Ponies CAN hold their liquor. Well, as long as they're used to it that is....

All in all, the ceremony was a great turnout; people from all over Equestria came. BLU could've been the best OR worst thing to happen to Ponyville since flushable toilets, but as it turned out, they happened to be the best. Saving many lives not once, not twice, not thrice....But EIGHT times! The residents were so grateful for their contributions, they made a GOLD statue of the 9 heroes! And just like on Earth, Gold is hard to come by in Ponyville. So Twilight, Rarity, and all the other local Unicorns helped to track enough gold with their Magical horns to make the statues. The statue sits right next to Town hall, so everyone will be able to see the heroes that not only saved their lives, but generations later, their daughters lives, their grand-daughters lives, their great grand-daughters lives, and so on, you get the picture. On the plaque of the statue, it commemorates Team BLU by stating: "This is Team BLU, the fearless heroes who saved Equestria a countless number of times within a few weeks." Also, right outside the limits of Ponyville, the welcome banner now states: "Welcome to Ponyville.....Where the Magic happens." below the quote is a giant picture of the 9 heroes in their battle Poses. Plays are starting to be written, showcasing what BLU really did for not only Ponyville, but for all of Equestria. The first play will open up at the Canterlot Theater and play all throughout Hearth's Warming weekend.

Princess Celestia and Princess Luna tried to think of ideas on how to get Team BLU back home. It took about three Months before one day, 9 OTHER warriors came into town. They looked exactly like BLU, except they were Red. Team RED to be exact. They admitted to the BLU's that they missed them. They liked playing their little game of "Cheating Death, Stealing Life". BLU said they didn't "miss" them, but they were attached to being killed/killing them all day every day. It brought them joy. Team RED's Engineer told Team BLU the only reason they were teleported to Ponyville is because the woman simply known as 'The Announcer' sent them there because she was tired of announcing all of their stupid Simulation Games. This made BLU pissed off. They knew that lady was a bitch, but they didn't know she could send them to another Dimension. So RED and BLU devised a plan. They would kill the lady Announcer when they got back home, and find another Announcer, one who enjoyed the art of War, and one who wouldn't send them to another Dimension only because she wanted a Vacation. BLU asked how RED got here, and how they would get back. RED's Engineers explained. Basically in short, Engineer had created a new and Improved Teleportation system, called "The Elevator". The Elevator opened up a vortex. Team RED had to swim through the black Abyss for a long time. When asked how they knew where Team BLU was, Engineer then explained he upgraded Spy's Sapper to fish for the coordinates of Team BLU. It worked. RED's Engineer had brought his Wrench and advanced Toolbox. He began to make The Elevator. It took all but 5 minutes. The 18 assassins had to go home now. Team RED said they were interested in Ponyville, and would definitely return one day to see what they could learn, while Team BLU said they would return to Ponyville when they longed to see the incredible friends they had made while there.

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Three months after the heroes’ ceremony.....

Ponyville.......

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"Vell, I guess that means it is time to go....." Said Medic. He was happy to be going home, but at the same time also disappointed. He truly appreciated what he had learned about Magic and Science while in Ponyville.

"Da......" Grumbled heavy. "Da sandviches were just starting to get tastee here." Fluttershy came up to Heavy, and gently nuzzled him. The big Russian Bear smiled.

"Do not worry, little flutta pony......Heavy vill be back one day to see you." Fluttershy smiled. He was so big, but so gentle and kind.

"Goodbye, Heavy," Said Fluttershy. Heavy patted her on the head.

"Sniper?" Said Rainbow Dash, still acting like she was blind. "Sniper? Where are you?"

Sniper chuckled. "Ya can't fool me, Dasher. You've been able to see for two months."

Rainbow Dash smiled. "I know, I know. Thanks, dude. From helping me when I couldn't see, to teaching me how to knock out suckers with thunderbolts, to just....Being a great friend." Tears began to form in her eyes, so she quickly wiped her eyes with her hoof.

"Dashy?" Said Sniper. He couldn't believe she was starting to cry. She was the toughest Pony he'd ever met. "You crying, luv?"

"No...." Said Rainbow Dash. Still desperately trying to evaporate the tears that were clearly visible.

"Ya know..." Said sniper. "There ain't no shame in crying, Dasher. It's a natural quality. It shows you that you're normal. Everyone cries."

"I know...." Said Rainbow Dash.

"Besides..." Said Sniper. "You shouldn't be threating, luv. I won't be away fa too long."

Rainbow Dash nodded, and smiled. She then pulled in Sniper for a strong hug.

Sniper smiled. "That's the spirit, kiddo!"


"Yo, Pinks'....Guess I'll be seein' you around?" Said Scout.

Pinkie Pie nodded sadly. "Whose going to help me with my pranks nooowwww?"

"Don't worry. I'll be swingin' around here every now and again. And everytime I come, we're gonna cap off my return with a friggen AMAZING prank!"

Pinkie grinned from ear to ear. Pinkie and Scout had gotten quite close in the time BLU was in Ponyville. It was more than just pranks. Scout just made Pinkie happy all around whenever she saw him.

"YAY! I can't wait!" Said Pinkie. She then hugged him. Although it was a more gentle Hug than Rainbow Dash's.

"Yo," Scout said. "I've never gotten this since I've been here....But you always smell like friggen Cotton candy!" Pinkie giggled.

"That's cuz I take baths in Cotton Candy, silly!"

"What the he-"

"Well, it's actually MELTED Cotton Candy. Plus, I brush my teeth with it, too. I wonder how my teeth stay so white then. Stuff like Cotton Candy and Cakes give you cavities, right? Sooooo, then WHY would my teeth not be all broken and gross?"
Pinkie laughed. Scout used to facehoof himself when she blabbed on like this. But him, and everyone else on Team BLU had gotten used to it to the point where they just let her talk.

"And I thought I talked alot! But you take the cake, Pinks'."

"CAKE? THERE'S CAKE? WHERE'S THE CAKE? I WANT THE CAKE! WHO HAS THE CAKE? Scout, I hope you're not lying. Because if there really isn't cake, then you should tell me. Because now, I'm going to be looking all over for it, and never find it. So plllleeeeaassseeee tell me.....WHERE'S THE CAAAAKKEEE?!"

"Surprisingly....I'm gonna miss this...." Thought a smiling Scout.

"Well, lassie," Said Demoman. "I guess it's time ta go hum....."

"Ah can't believe it." Said Applejack. "Me and the gang where gettin' used t'ya'll. And now, ya have ta go." Applejack wouldn't admit it, but she had a crush on Demoman. Even with all of his flaws, he was still a great guy. Except when she would wake up 4 times a week to find him knocked out in one of the Apple trees. How the hell did he get up there, anyway?

Demo chuckled. "I know, sure is depressin', itn't it?" Applejack nodded. "But ya know, lassie, we'll be here vistin' before ye know it!" Applejack smiled at this. "There we gooooo, that's what I want ta see. You take good care of yeself, alright?"
Applejack nodded. "Darn tootin', Tavish!" And then, they hugged.


"I can't believe you have to leave, Doctor." Said Twilight. She was interested in what he had to tell her, about Earth's going on's and what not.

"Yes...." Said Medic. "It is quite a tragedy, Fraulein Sparkle. I have enjoyed talking to you about ze working's of Magic.
Perhaps when I come back, we can tell eachother about more things that intrigue us."

Twilight smiled. "That would be wonderful! I have so many more questions about where you are from."

Medic chuckled. "As do I. You certainly are ze most intelligent Pony I've met here. Probably ze most intelligent person I've met in all my days."

Twilight blushed. "You sure do have a sharp mind, yourself."


Rarity was crying as she went up to hug Engineer. When BLU first came to town, she thought Spy would be her type.
Charming and as sharp as can be, but with every attribute Spy had, Engineer had a higher supply of.

"Awwww..." Said Engineer. He was worried for Rarity's safety. Pyro knew herself that the two were only friends. But he would expect her to turn her into a furry little torch with the way she was coming into physical contact with Him. "Miss Rarity, please stop cryin'. Ah know you're awful sad n' all, but ah'm gonna come back and see you again one day." Engineer looked deep into Rarity's eyes and smiled.

And even through her many tears, Rarity smiled back. "Many apologies, Dale...But this is what happens when I lose very good friends of mine."

Engineer was surprised. He didn't know Rarity cared for him that much. "Do you really consider me as good a friend as that?" Rarity nodded "Wow.....I-Thank you, ma'am."

"Oh no, no, no, no, no, Dale. I am grateful; you and your friends saved Equestria from assuming terror. We should be thanking you for the rest of our days! You are one of the noblest Ponies I've ever met. And that's the honest truth, Dale." Engineer and Rarity smiled.

"Ah believe you ponies deserve as much credit as we do. Without you, we wouldn't have been as successful."

"That may be true," Said Rarity. "But the real STARS of the show were you 9. On behalf on Ponyville, Dale, we cannot thank you enough."

"Much obliged, Miss Rarity. And ah have to thank you again for mah Gem Sentry. She'll be a real help where I'm goin'." Engineer smiled.

"How long will it be until I hear from you again?" Asked Rarity. She wanted to see Engineer every day now for the rest of her life. That's how much he has meant to her in such a short time.

"Ah promise you, me and the boys will be writin' back to all of you at least once a week, EVERY week." Engineer nodded
"I believe that fully." Said Rarity. "I know you enough to know that you don't go back on your promises, Dale."

"That ah don't, ma'am." Engineer and Rarity smiled once again, and continued to hug for a long time.

After everyone said their goodbyes, the two different colored teams of 8 waved goodbye to all of Ponyville, promising to return soon and spend time with their new friends.

-----------TO BE CONTINUED----------

Letters To Die For

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One week later.....

Ponyville.....

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Derpy Hooves waited by the entrance to the Portal from BLU's dimension. It had been one week since RED has convinced BLU to go back to their game of killing. BLU had promised to write to everyone in Ponyville once a week every week. Today, was mail day, and Derpy was patiently waiting for the mail to come. She couldn't wait to hear from Soldier, and neither could her daughter, Dinky. Derpy wouldn't have to wait much longer, though. Suddenly, the portal opened, and a bag of letters came crashing down to the ground.

Derpy smiled from ear to ear. She sorted through the mail. It seemed as though all of Team BLU had written to whomever they had been attached to the most while in Ponyville. Medic had written to Twilight, Heavy wrote to Fluttershy, Sniper wrote to Rainbow Dash, Scout wrote to Pinkie Pie, Engineer wrote to Rarity, Spy wrote to Zecora, Demoman wrote to Applejack, Pyro wrote to Trixie, but Trixie was not in Ponyville at the Moment. She was in Canterlot, trying to become noticed for her Magic Shows. And finally, Soldier....Had written to Derpy. Derpy squealed with excitement. She would have to deliver the mail now.

Derpy started to fly in the air, but not 3 seconds later, she crashed into an unsuspecting Rainbow Dash.

"Ouch!" Said Rainbow Dash, rubbing her head with her hoof. "That's the third time this week, Derpy!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry Rainbow Dash! I'm just in a hurry to deliver this mail, and-"

"Whoa, hold on." Rainbow interrupted. "Is that the mail from BLU?" Derpy nodded.

At that, Rainbow Dash's eyes lit up. "Is there a letter for me?" She would be pissed if Sniper didn't write to her.

"Of course!" Smiled Derpy. "It's from Sniper, too." Rainbow Dash then flew high into the air, and shouted a clearly audible "YEEEEEEESSSSSSS!" She then flew back down, leaving a very noticeable crack in the ground.

Rainbow Dash scratched her neck awkwardly. "Ehhhh, I'll fix that later." Derpy giggled.

"Here," said Derpy. Handing Rainbow Dash her letter. "I have to go deliver the rest of these now. See ya later, Dash!" And with that, she flew off.

Rainbow quickly opened the letter, and began to read it.

Dear Rainbow Dash,
Ello, luv. How are ya doing? I'm a bit of a drag at the moment, honestly. It sounds weird, coming from someone as calculating as me, but I feel a bit.....Bored here at the base. After everything that happened at Ponyville, I just can't seem to find killing people fun anymore. Not only that, but I can't seem to stand still for a minute. Heh, I blame you for that. But anyway, if things seem this boring for much longer, I'm thinking about taking a lil' trip to good ole Ponyville. How does that sound?
Love, Sniper.

Rainbow Dash was beyond excited. She missed Sniper so very much, and though she wouldn't admit it, when she was blind, she kind of enjoyed Sniper taking care of her. She was hoping that he would get more bored, and FAST!

Derpy flew a short distance to Twilight's house. She knocked on the door, and Spike answered.

"Hey, Spike." Said Derpy. "Is Twilight home?"

"She pulled another all nighter." Said Spike. "That Medic really did a number on her. She keeps trying to find stuff on Humans. She said," And then, Spike started to imitate Twilight in his spot-on impression of a girl. I wonder if he secretly is one, sometimes...."I want to be ready when the species returns to Ponyville." Rainbow Dash was right. She's a MAJOR egghead!"

Derpy giggled. "Well, she's in luck. Because the mail came today, and Medic had written her."

And then, out of nowhere, Twilight pushed Spike out of the way, and inserted herself into this conversation.

"MEDIC WROTE TO ME?!" Twilight said, grinning ever so huge. Derpy nodded

"Here you go." Derpy said, handing Twilight her letter. And with that, she flew off.

"Oh, how great! Another letter from my Earth buddy!" Said Twilight, not noticing a in pain Spike groaning on the floor.

"What's so special about him, anyway?"

"Spike....He's someone from a whole nother Dimension, and a whole nother species! This discovery is the most interesting thing I've ever....Well, discovered!"
Spike then imitated kissing sounds, which earned him a glare from Twilight.

"It's not like that, Spike. I just find him quite interesting. This could be a breakthrough if a pony like me could find out information about.....HUMANS...." She really put the emphasis on that last word, almost moaning it.

"Whatever you say. I still think you've got the hots for him."
Twilight ignored Spike, and began to read the letter.

Dear Fraulein Sparkle,
It is most comvorting to be back to my real Job. Healing people is a great help, and I am proud to do just that. Under the subject of my return to Ponyville, I vill return when killing people is a tiresome hobby once again. Ponyville is a very peaceful place, and sometimes, the boys and me need peace. And I am pleased to announce, that when ve return, I will be bringing some books on humans for you. Because I know how you vould like to learn about our culture and vhat not. Until then, you vill just have to wait.
Sincerely, Medic.

"Eureka!" Said Twilight. She couldn't believe she would soon be learning about REAL Humans!

Derpy then stopped by Sugarcube Corner. She stepped inside the sweets shop, she knew who she had to look for here.

"Pinkie Piiiieeee, are you there?" Derpy started looking around the shop. "I have something for yooooouuuuu....."

Suddenly, a giant cake close to her exploded! And who would be inside of it, then Ponyville's most random citizen.

Derpy screamed, and then flew out of the door as fast as she could.

"Wait! Derpy, it's me!" Said Pinkie. She then looked in the mirror, and realized why she had flew away without even saying goodbye.

"Oooohhhhhhh...I look like an evil cake monster! RAAAAWWWWRRRR, I am Cake-mare......My icing will clog your arteries!" Pinkie giggled. "I really crack myself up! I mean, who is more funnier then me? Apparently, Derpy didn't like my joke." Pinkie frowned, and then quickly smiled again.

"Oh well! Hmmm....What's this?" She gasped. "A LETTER FROM SCOUT! COOL, COOL, COOLIO!" Pinkie then began to bounce around the shop, and the sugar didn't slow her down one bit. She bounced off the sides, on the ceiling, on the customer's heads, and all over the treats that had been prepared for orders.

As the customers ran away in fear of this cuckoo pony, all Pinkie could do was laugh. "I guess they couldn't.....Take the cake!" Then, she quickly ran over and played the joke-drum sound on the random drums she hides all over town. Ya know, for: EMERGENCY PURPOSES. "That ones good, I should really try to remember that one!" Said Pinkie, as she began to read Scout's letter.

Dear oh Pink one.....
Looks like today ain't ya day, Pancakes! And then, a random white liquid sprayed Pinkie in the face. Thinking it was icing, Pinkie quickly licked it all of. She would soon figure out, that was a retarded idea!

"What the? This doesn't taste like ici-" And then......She realized what it was.....She rushed over to the trashcan, and did what any sane person would do.....
She threw up.

Pinkie now had a very ticked off expression on her face. "That was NOT funny...." And then, slowly but surely. Pinkie began to giggle, and then giggle some more, all up until the point where she laughed so hard her mane became ruffled. She wiped the tears out of her, and said "Okay, it WAS pretty funny!" She then laughed some more, and then got the same disappointed expression on her face. "But it was NOT tasty!"

Derpy then arrived at Fluttershy's cottage. She only hoped that the shy pony wouldn't cower in fear like she had moments ago at the Cakes' bake shop. What the hell WAS that thing?! She didn't want to know.....

Derpy knocked on the door ever so gently. "Wh-Whose there?" Said a quiet voice from inside.

"It's me, Fluttershy. Derpy." Said Derpy.

"Ar-Are you sure?"

"Why would I lie about that, Fluttershy?" She giggled. Her shyness was adorable.

And then, slowly, the door was opened, and inside stood Fluttershy. With Angel on her head.

"Oh, you were right....It IS you, Derpy." Derpy nodded.

"I just wanted to deliver your mail to you. It's from Heavy." Fluttershy smiled. She had been hoping to hear from the big guy.

"Oh, well......Yes....Thank you." Fluttershy took the letter and then slammed the door. Derpy then shrugged, and took off again.

"Well, Angel...." Said Fluttershy. "Let's see what our big BLU friend has to tell us." She then began to read Heavy's letter.

Dear Fluttershy,
Hello, little shy Pony....Heavy wanted to talk to you. Is a bit weird to be back here at my original Job, putting thousands of bullets from Sasha into thousands of other tiny baby RED's. I was used to Ponyville. So much happiness and Peace. Heavy look big and rough, but even Heavy like peace from killing sometimes. Which is why, Heavy be back in Ponyville soon. But, if you, or pretty marshmallow pony, or silly eyes pony, or peptobismol pony, or crayola crayon pony, or lavender pony, or even cereal brand pony need Heavy before Heavy is ready to come, I will come anyway, and save all you cute little things. Also, sorry about crumbs on paper. Sandvich is to blame for such mess.....
Da, this is Heavy, by the way.

All Fluttershy could do was smile. "Well, I do need protection sometimes...."

Derpy then flew to Sweet Apple Acres, the first thing she saw was Applejack. And what else would she be doing but working.

"Hi, Applejack." Said Derpy.

"Howdy, pardner. I see ya got some mail there."

"Yeah, it's from Team BLU." Applejack's eyes widened. She forgot that today was the day BLU wrote to everyone. She hoped that Demoman was the one who had written to her. Without even thinking, Applejack blurted out "Is it from Demoman?!"

Derpy giggled, and nodded. "Your secret is safe with me, Applejack..." And with that, Derpy flew off.

"And just what in the HAY does that mean?" Applejack then began to read the letter.
Dear Applejack,

Good day to ye, lassie. Can't believe it's already been a week since we all left Ponyville. Coming back to a place we had known for years was almost....Refreshing. BLU and RED have, pretty much, called a Truce. We play for fun now, not to gain revenge in any way. Besides, how can ye hope to exact revenge, when everytime someone dies, they come back to life 20 seconds later? It's crazy at most time, Applejack. I miss you and everyone else, and when we come back, I've spent quite a bit of time making some of me homemade fireworks. And when we get there, I'm going to set them off! Yes, this drunk knows how to have fun.
Your lass, Demoman.

Applejack smiled, as Big Mac curiously asked: "That from Demoman?"

And all Applejack could say to that, with a smile of course, was: ".........Eeeeyup."

Derpy went to Zecora's hut, but she was not there. So she just left Spy's letter to her close to the door.

Trixie was not in town, so she decided she would put her letter in the "Re-Mail later Box". Instead, she headed out to the last place she needed to go, Carousel Boutique. She knocked on the door, but little did she know, Rarity was waiting by the door the whole time. As soon as the knock was heard, Rarity opened up the door fast, startling Derpy.

"Oooohhhh! Derpy!" Said Ponyville's fashioneista. "All you all right, darling?"

"Yeah, I'm oka-"

"OOOOOHHHH! What is it you've got THERE?" Interrupted Rarity. Rummaging through the mail sack.

"Uuuuummmm....Mail?"

"Well, where is MY letter? SURELY I was written too." Rarity would be PISSED if she didn't have that letter in her hoof within 5 seconds.

"Uuuummm.....It's in your Mane....."

Then, Rarity shook her Mane, and Engineer's letter fell to the ground. Rarity blushed, embarrassed.

"Sorry about that," Rarity said apologetically. "I've just been, waiting for this letter."

Derpy giggled. "I can tell." Rarity chuckled nervously.

"I have to go!" Rarity used her Magic to levitate the letter inside, and quickly slammed the door.

"Wow....She must of REALLY wanted to read that letter." Derpy giggled. "I can't blame her, I can't wait to read mine!" She then dashed off home Quickly, wanting to know what Soldier had written to her.

Inside Carousel Boutique, everything was a MESS! The mannequins were lying on the floor, some of them with their head's knocked off. No new dresses could be found, as Rarity hadn't made ANY since Engineer left. All the old clothes Rarity used as look-at's had been torn to shreds.

"Oh my..." Said Rarity. "Seems as though I may have gotten, a bit carried away with my impatience." Rarity chuckled. "But, it was worth it! This letter was worth it!" She then began to read.

Dear Miss Rarity,
Howdy, Darlin'? First of all, I must thank you kindly, for Gem Sentry. She's a beaut, and she NEVER let's me down in the heat of battle. Rarity cringed. She didn't like the thought off her gems being used to KILL people!
Secondly, I'm pleased to announce that we will be visiting Ponyville soon. While there, we really had grown to value what we gained there. Other than my, er, "Working Buddies", I hadn't had any friends for a LONG time. And once I got to Ponyville, I had gained an undeniable amount ah friends! But, my most treasured Ponyville pal, is you, Miss. Ah wish you luck in your new designs, and ah agree with you...Gems really do make everything better!
Sincerely, Dell.
P.S.: There's a little somethin' for you inside the envelope.

"Hmm?" Said Rarity, she looked inside the envelope again, and found a Picture. Rarity gasped. It was a picture of Engineer in HUMAN form! None of the Ponies in Ponyville had EVER seen an actual human before! It was obviously Engineer, from the hard-hat on head, to wrench in hand, this was the Engineer Rarity had grown to love.

"Oh, Dell...." Rarity smiled like she had never smiled before. She hugged the picture. She thought Dell was just as handsome, if not more handsome, as a Human.
"This is a very special picture....It deserves a VERY special casing." Rarity then used her Magic, to summon to her, the most BEAUTIFUL of picture frames. It was made entirely of Gems! Rarity placed the photo inside of it.

"Now, where to put this? A special picture such as this, deserves a special place in my Home!" Smiled Rarity. She then gasped. "That's PERFECT! She set the frame right by her bedside, that way, Engineer was the last thing she saw before she went to sleep, and the first thing she saw when she woke up.
"There! Oh my...." Rarity took a look around Carousel Boutique, it looked like Applejack's pig pen.

"I REALLY should give this place some TLC. But first....Maybe a little beauty nap.....I'm just worn out beyond belief!" Before Rarity hit the hay, she looked at the picture of Engineer one last time, and gleamed with happiness. "Oooohhh, Dell.....I cannot WAIT to see you again....." And with that, Rarity drifted off into her slumber.

------TO BE CONTINUED-------

The Invasion

///////////////

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.....

Over The Limit.....

///////////////

It was now or never, Phillip Brooks knew this. This was perhaps the biggest match, of his entire career. He was currently in a Match against the WWE Champion, Daniel Bryan, with the coveted championship on the line, of course. So far, neither CM Punk nor Bryan had gotten the upper hand. For Punk, that was bad. He had faced Daniel Bryan numerous times. From the WWE, to ROH. He was perhaps, the best all around wrestler he had ever been in the ring with.

Everything took a turn for the worse, when out of nowhere, Bryan had reached out to grab Punk's arm. It was obvious what he was thinking, the Yes-Lock, Bryan's signature move, had yet to be countered. Punk would change that in an instant. He was able to squirm his way out of the usually lethal finishing maneuver. Bryan went for one of his painful kicks, but Punk was able to dodge it. Then, like a thief in the night, Punk was able to lift Bryan onto his shoulders. The crowd knew what was about to happen. Their deafening chants of "CM Punk! CM Punk!" Could be heard from outside the building.

As if on the drop of a dime, Punk used his force to drive Bryan's nose straight into his knee. The crowd erupted, as Punk covered the Yes-Man. The referee did all he was good for, jumping down onto the mat in a flash, while all the while, making the most joyful three count of CM Punk's professional career. 1......2......3. The crowd cheered louder than they had all night. The bell rang, and Tony Chimel said it as only he could. "Here is your winner, and the NEEEEEWWWW......W....W....E CHAAAAMMMMPPIIOOONNN........C........M.......PUNK!"

And at that very moment, CM Punk had felt on top of the world. He literally was on top of the Wrestling world. He had earned this title shot, and he got what he had worked for. The referee presented Punk with his title, and Punk held it ever so excitedly above his head. He then went outside the ring, and celebrated with his truly loyal fans. Everyone seemed happy for him. Even Daniel Bryan, who, despite his heelish ways, shook Punk's hand, and left for the backstage area. Letting Punk soak up all of this up. And he did that....Relishing in the spotlight he so desperately deserved....

Backstage......

Many clapped for CM Punk, and his awesome match. Punk thanked them all, and calmly returned to the locker room. He was Straightedge, so he would not celebrate in drinking, smoking, or getting high. He was above all of those substances. He would celebrate by hanging out with his best friends.

Back in the locker room, Austin Ross, Freddie Hediger, ZeRoyalViking, and UberHaxorNova all congratulated him on his latest championship victory. Ryback only nodded, while Nathan Bougeno and Zane Dotson continued to watch My Little Pony clips, and Marcus Sims, well, he sat, jealous of Punk's success. All Marcus had in his possession was the United States championship, that he had just won earlier in the night. "Thanks, guys! Damn, was it hard, though..." Said the Chicago native. He would admit when his opponent had taken him to the limits, and Daniel Bryan did just that.

"I'm sure it was," said Freddie Hediger, who was playing with his three sons, Damian, Kit, and Tate. "D-Bry is one tough son of a bitch."

"I could beat him..." Said Marcus Sims. "Easily....." He smirked, flaunting the talent he didn't have.

"I'm sure you think you can beat me too, right, Sims?" Said the new WWE Champion.

"You give me a title shot, and I'll prove it!" Retorted Sims. He was tired of being overlooked. He was ready to make a huge impact.

"You're on RAW, jackass." Said Nova. "Besides, you can't handle Punk's goods."

"But I sure can handle your Mom's goods." Said a pissed off Sims. He wasn't going to stand to be made of by NOVA of all people! It was pathetic.

"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Said Nova, putting up his dukes. "IT'S ON, MOTHERFUCKER."

Sims snorted. "Oh, please....You aren't even a real Wrestler!"

"This ain't Wrestling, douche-nozzle. This is fighting! You wan't Wrestling, get a sex change, then we'll talk."

Sims laughed at the idiot in front of him. "I'm sure you like me just the way you are, ya faggot!"

Nova snickered. "Are you serious? Your man-boobs jiggle when you walk!" At that, everyone in the room laughed
uproariously. Except it could be said that Zane and Nathan were only laughing because of My Little Pony. Ryback just smiled.

Sims was REALLY pissed now. He was ready to tear this little bitch apart!

"If you want a piece of Nova, you will have to take down Ze first!" Said Ze, one of Nova's best friends.

"Awwwwww...." Cooed Sims. "That's ADOWABLE! You better bring ALL of The Creatures if you wanna stop ME!"

"Marcus..." Said Austin. He had become friends with Sims ever since he had turned into a heel. His annoying hick Nephew,
Jeff Ross, had been getting on his nerves for as long as he had to babysit his ass, which was a pretty long time. But tonight, Austin got revenge on the annoying bumpkin. He had squashed his ass in a Street Fight. "Just let it go, man. You can't be fighting right now."

"Fine..." Grumbled Sims. He didn't hate Nova, or Ze, or anybody really. He just had a short temper. If he had to beat the piss out of someone to make an Impact, he'd do it.

Meanwhile, Nathan and Zane laughed at the awesomeness that was My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. It was their favorite Show. They were LEGIT Bronies. They owned the Shirts, the Posters, the Plushies, Pinkie Pie underwear. ANYTHING related to the show, they had. And if they didn't have it, they would get it. Freddie watched intently along with the "Senseis of Bronytude". Freddie was in the process of becoming "20% Cooler" as Zane and Nathan put it. Freddie didn't get the reference yet, but he soon would.

"I can't believe you agreed to watch that damn Show, Freddie...." Said Austin. Ever since it debuted on October 10th, 2010, Austin and Freddie, like all good friends do when making pacts, had made a pact to NEVER watch the Show. But, as usual, curiosity convinced Freddie to give in.

"It really is a pretty good Show, man!" Said Freddie.

"Only pussies watch it." Said Nova. Marcus and Ze nodded in agreement. Zane and Nathan were used to being called such. They were alone in the locker room it seemed. Now, they had Freddie to enjoy the Show with. And that made them very happy.

"Yeah, well, you wouldn't be thinking that if you gave it a try." Said an annoyed Freddie. He had only watched one Episode so far, but he enjoyed the witty Show in all honesty.

This comment made Austin, Ze, Nova, Punk and Marcus laugh UPROARIOUSLY. Ryback went in a corner to sit, away from the Noise. While the Bronies looked on in disgust.

"SHUT UP, ASSHOLES!" Said Nathan.

"Let's just turn the volume up," Said Zane. And so they did. It was blaring, though. Just like the Episode. "There we go!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Laughed Austin. "THEY-THEY-THEY-They want us to.........PFFFFTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!"

"Oh!!!!! MY SIDES! MY SIDES!" Screamed Nova.

"ZE'S SIDES HURT IMMENSLY, AS WELL!" Ze said in between laughs.

"I will NEVER turn into a Gay-Lord!" Teased Sims, while laughing of course. Ryback just sat in the corner, probably thinking of ripping everyone in this Room's neck off. He had learned to be a bit nicer to everyone backstage. He used to just squeeze everyone's face upon Arrival, but he learned that was the wrong approach. Ryback didn't talk much. He didn't talk AT ALL, actually. Why? No one knows....I JUST FUCKING SAID HE DOESN'T TALK!


Meanwhile, in his own Private Locker Room, Emperor Pyro-Zi, a purple alien with a brain of many wonders, was fuming. "Those accursed Humans!" Said the Evil purple Alien. "I can't even hear my own thought's in this infernal racket!" Then, Pyro-Zi had an idea. An EVIL idea. Oh, it was so evil. He grinned from ear to ear at his evilness.

"Hmmmmm....." Thought Pyro-Zi. "I think......It's time....To try out my new Invention." And with that, he got up, grabbed his weapon, and went off on the long Journey....To 5 steps away...

Pyro-Zi knocked on the door, but no one answered. Probably because no one could hear the knock between a singing Applejack and yelling grown men.

So Pyro-Zi did something to break the noise....He kicked down the locker room door. Immediately, Zane hit the pause button. And the laughing stopped.

"Yo, Pyro-Dick!" Said Freddie. "Wassup?" At this insult, Pyro-Zi smirked and chuckled.

"You want to know....." Said the Emperor. "What is.....Up?" Freddie nodded.

"Ze thinks you are most Purple." Said Ze, stating the obvious. Everyone face-palmed at this.

"THIS....." Said Pyro-Zi, placing some odd contraption on the ground. "Is what is up!" Just then, Pyro-Zi pressed a button on the remote to the device. Immediately, the invention unwinded into something big with an octagonal frame.

"What......What is that.....?" Asked a confused, and curious Marcus.

"Do you want to know?" Said Pyro-Zi. "Well, this....Is the Dimensionomicon!" Pyro-Zi screamed in awe of what he could do with his brain. "I can't take over the world with all of this Noise! So, I've decided, to give you all....An early vacation."

Pyro-Zi smirked, and pressed another button on the remote. On cue, a portal opened up. Pyro-Zi hung onto the door, as Freddie, Damian, Kit, Tate, Austin, Marcus, Ze, Nova, Zane, Nathan, Punk and Ryback were sucked into the Portal.

"Uh oh...." Said Pyro-Zi. "It would appear, I do not know the strength of my own Machines! I KNEW I SHOULD'VE TESTED IT BEFORE I USED IT FOR MY OWN PERSONAL PLEASURE!" And with that, the Dimensionomicon pulled Pyro-Zi away from the door, sucking him into the portal.

///////////////

Meanwhile....

Equestria.....

///////////////

Though neither Princess Luna nor Princess Celestia noticed it, 12 stars glistered in the breezing Equestrian air, along with one purple meteorite, with a dark aura around it. Then, without warning. A giant KABOOM could be heard across Ponyville. Not in Canterlot, though. Which means neither Princess could greet whatever had arrived.

The sound of the explosion traveled all throughout Ponyville. Not even the heaviest sleeper wasn't awoken.
"What the HELL was that?!" Said an unsuspecting Rainbow Dash. Then, she gained a smile. "Could it be.....?" She got her lazy ass off of her cloud. She would have to find out if what she was thinking was true.

The explosion had interrupted Pinkie Pie's baking. She was taking Cupcakes out of the oven the exact moment the noise was heard. She dropped them on earful impact. "WHOA!!!!!" Said Pinkie. "That sounded cooly wooly! I'll have to go check it out! But whatever it is.....I'll greet it with Cupcakes!" Pinkie smiled, then picked up the cupcakes from the floor, which was hard to do, considering they burned more than ass. She quickly darted out the front door.

Fluttershy was feeding her many animals as the explosion went off, causing all of the little critters to hide in fear. Fluttershy was effected as well, Screaming bloody murder, and flying up a tree for safety.

"Oh my...." Said Fluttershy. Worried about her animal's well being. She didn't have time to worry, though, as Rainbow Dash came crashing into one of the tree Branches.

"Rainbow Dash!" Silently screamed Fluttershy. "Are you okay?" She flew to the ground to check on her fellow Pegasi friend.
"Who cares?!" Yelled an exciting Rainbow Dash. "BLU is back! Come on!" She grabbed Fluttershy, garnering an Eep from the terrified Pony.

"Are you sure it's BLU? What if it's something.....SCARY?" Fluttershy shivered in fear.

"Well," Said Rainbow Dash. "If it is, I'll protect ya!" That made Fluttershy feel more comfortable. She could always trust Rainbow Dash, her being the toughest Pony and all.

Apple Bloom was perched high ontop of one of the Apple family Trees. "You sure yur gonna catch me, sis?" Said a worried Apple Bloom.

"Ah course I am!" Said Applejack. "Now jump down!"

And as soon as Apple Bloom's back hooves left that tree-branch, the explosion was heard.

"What in the name'a Zap-apple jam was that?!" Said Applejack. She then took off, following the sound. Too bad she forget about her poor sister. Apple Bloom fell to the ground with a loud THUMP!

"APPLEJACK!" Screamed Mrs. Red Bow. "WHERE YAH GOIN'!?" She then looked at the side of her flank. "Nope...." She said disappointingly. "Looks like ah'm not gonna git mah Cutie Mark fur landin' on mah butt!" She then took off after her sister.

As the explosion sounded off, Twilight was.....Reading. I know, surprising, right?! The rattle of the explosions caused all of the Books on the shelves to fall, covering Spike and Twilight in a mess of Books.

"What was that?!" Said Spike, pushing himself out of the mound of books

Twilight smiled from ear to ear.

"Uhhhh....Twilight?" Said a worried Spike.

"I know who it is!" Twilight then ran out of the door

"WAIT UP!" Yelled Spike. "Man.....For a Nerd....SHE'S FAST!" He then ran after her.


Rarity was the most affected by the Explosion. How you ask? It woke her from her Beauty sleep!

"Grrrrrr........" Was all Rarity could manage to say through clenched teeth. "Who DARES wake me up when I am indulging in my BEAUTY SLEEP!?" She screamed. "The NERVE of some ponies!" She then looked at her photo of Engineer, and smiled while blushing.

"Unless.....It's HIM...." Moaned Rarity. "Sleep must wait! I'm coming, Dell!" She quickly applied some eyeliner, and ran out of the door.

----A Few moments Later------

The Mane 6 all had the same Idea. They all met outside of Twilight's house.

"So," said Twilight. "I'm guessing you all heard the explosion, too?"

"OH YEAH!" said an Excited Pinkie Pie. "I was making my SCRUMTILLILICIOUS Cupcakes! And then, I heard a BOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!! It made me drop my Cupcakes! So I figured I'd give them to whoever made that sound! And if they don't like them....It's because they fell on the floor!" Pinkie giggled. "I wonder how Floorcakes taste!"

She then popped one into her mouth, Rarity cringing at this exchange.

"Pinkie, please Darling," Said Rarity. "You mustn't eat food that has come in contact with the Floor!"

Pinkie though about it for a moment. "You're RIGHT!" She said. "We just mopped the floor today. Which means these
Floor-cakes, are also Mop-cakes! Hmmm...They taste good, though! So I'm not complaning!" Everyone gave a disgusting look. They all expected this, though. After all, it WAS Pinkie.

"Ah wonder where that sound came from." Said Applejack.

"It sounded like it came from that field WAAAAYY over there" Said Twilight, gesturing towards the field that Team BLU had first been teleported too.

"Well, comeon!" Said the nonpatient Rainbow Dash. "We've gotta go see the guys from BLU!"

"How do ya'll know it's them?" Said Applejack.

"Do you have any other Theories on who it could be?" Said Rarity.

"Hmmm..." Said Applejack. "Jumping mutant graham-crackers! They're jumping mutant graham-crackers, ya'll!!!!"

Pinkie giggled. "Don't be silly, AJ! Jumping mutant graham-crackers don't like cupcakes! For foal's SAKE, they can't even eat!" And with that astonishing statement, Pinkie hopped off towards the field.

"We should follow her..." said Fluttershy.

"Yes," nodded Twilight. "Before she does something....."

"Stupid?" Interrupted Rainbow Dash.

"No"

"Plum crazy?" said Applejack.

"No"

"Scaarrryyy????" cowered Fluttershy.

"No....."

"Before she does Something.....Pinkie?" announced Rarity.

"Bingo...." agreed Twilight. "Let's go, everypony!"

And with that, they all walked off to meet what had made that awful Sound. Boy, are they in for a surprise when they get there....

--------TO BE CONTINUED------------

Arriving At the Unknown

///////////////

Equestria....

Random fucking Field....

///////////////

In the middle of a field, deep on the outskirts of Ponyville, laid nine grown men, three children, and one diabolical alien. Unlike Team BLU, the WWE Superstars were in their human form. They had hands, not hooves, and unlike all Ponies (except for special occasions), they were wearing their Wrestling Attire. Except for Freddie's kids, who were wearing clothes 10 year old's wear.

"Ugh....." groaned Nova. "Where in an Ostrich's ass are we?!"

"Looks like some kind of random field...." answered Zane.

"It kind of looks familiar for some odd reason...." said Nathan. Really racking his brain on where he had seen this field before.

"Ze thinks we are in a different dimension!" everyone glared at him for saying what they already knew.

"Boy...." grumbled Marcus. "Just what in the FUCK makes ya think that?!"

"Calm down, Mark...." said Austin, trying to get Sims' blood pressure back to normal. "We obviously aren't on Earth anymore." Austin started looking around this new world. It looked like they were in a world where Animation ruled the roost.

"Holy shit!" exclaimed Freddie. "We're-we're ANIMATED!" Everyone gasped, and looked at themselves. Freddie was right, instead of their usual 5 fingers, they had the Animation minimum of 4 fingers.

"DAMN THAT STUPID ALIEN!" Yelled the WWE Champion. "Because of him and his stupid machines, we're in god knows where, and we only have 4 fingers!"

"Hey," said Freddie. "Atleast you've still got your belt." Punk looked down, the WWE Title was laying on the ground. He picked it up, and put it over his shoulder.

"And we've got our computer!" Zane and Nathan simultaneously yelled.

"I wonder how it feels to jack off while Animated...." Nova said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully with his index finger.

"Ze would like to test this theory, as well!"

And with that, Zane went to Pornhub, and him, Ze, Nathan and Nova started jacking off.

"HEY!" yelled Sims. "TAKE THAT OUTSIDE!" He felt stupid for saying that, they already WERE outside.

"Where the hell do you think we are?" argued Nathan. "Man, this DOES feel good to do....."

"AWWW YEAH!" Nova said joyfully. "RAPE DAT ASS! RAPE DAT AZZ!"

"I am surrounded by pawns...." thought Austin.

"Hey guys," said Freddie. "Why not put the porn away, and let's kick Pyro-Zi's ass!" To that, everyone cheered. Ryback just nodded. Upset he had been thrown into this situation. He was ready to squeeze that purple bastard's face like a vice.

"Not so fast, bro..." explained Punk. "He's gone!" everyone cursed out loud.

"He couldn't have gone too far..." said Austin.

"Who cares" said Marcus without a pause. He lied down into the field. The grass was surprisingly comfortable. "We finally have some peace.....We aren't crammed into a tiny locker room anymore. Now, we have a whole open field!" Everyone though about it for a moment, and nodded. They we're finally happy to be away from their sometimes annoying job.

"Yeah, it ain't so bad!" said Freddie. "I'm finally away from my stupid nephew!"

"You and me both, brother." said Austin, nodding. Freddie and Austin fistbumped.

"But hey," said Punk. "You're the Chairman, man. Whose gonna run things while you're gone? You don't know how long we're gonna be here."

Freddie though about it for a moment. He had a lot of responsibility running the day to day operations of the WWE, but he needed a break. "Whoever it is....Good luck to them!" Punk laughed.

Ryback paced around. He didn't care what they said. He enjoyed being the only undefeated Wrestler on the WWE Roster. A day without squashing someone, just isn't a day at all for him.

"Hey, bigman." said Freddie. "Chillax. We surely won't be here too long." To that, Ryback nodded, and sat down in the soft grass.

"How is this grass so soft?!" said Marcus. "It's unbelievable!"

"Ze wonders if such grass is edible..." With that, Ze took a chomp out of the grass, but he immediately spit it out.

"Well?" asked Punk. "Does it taste like your mom's vagina?"

"Ze would not know what that tastes like..." Punk chuckled at that lie. "But Ze's diagnosis? It tastes like my cat's Vagina....."

"Cool!" said Punk. "You even gave detail!" Ze rolled his eyes at this.

As all of this commotion was going on, no one seemed to notice where Freddie's kids had ran off to.

"Wait a minute...." said Freddie. "Where's my fucking kids?!"

///////////////

Meanwhile.....

The Everfree Forest...

///////////////

As soon as they arrived, Pyro-Zi quickly tip-toed off, avoiding being seen by his fellow wrestlers. After a few minutes of walking, he ended up in the Everfree Forest.

"Hmmm....Such a dark and disturbing residence this seems to be...." as he was saying this, some evil Three-Eyed bird flew right in front of Pyro-Zi's face. The Emperor was startled, but not scared. He quickly unhatched the briefcase he was carrying, and pulled out some calculator-like device. Pyro-Zi punched in a number, and a gun of some type appeared in his hands.

"Lazazooka.....FIRE!" Pyro-Zi fired the laser gun, which in turn fired a laser, which in turn, charred that bird's head into a Strip style Steak.

Pyro-Zi smirked. "Thank the Oncerian nebula I managed to grab my Inventional-Case! Now, I have every weapon or invention I have ever made at my full disposal!" Pyro-Zi started to laugh manically, but soon decided to shut up, "I may want to nudge the decibels down just a Bit....The last thing I want is to be caught!" Pyro-Zi looked at the bird he had just killed, the only thing damaged was his head. Pyro-Zi stomped on the fried head, causing blood to gush all over his boots. "Ugh.....This is disgusting! Engage Quick-Rinse sequence!" with that, a medium sized fan appeared, it sprayed the blood and brain matter off of Pyro-Zi's boots in a jiffy, and de-transformed back into the briefcase on Pyro-Zi's command.

"Yes, quite lucky I am to have all of this at my disposal." Pyro-Zi looked at the extremely large claws of the bird, and sawed them off with some metal Appliance.

"Hmmmm.....I could make something with these...." With that, Pyro-Zi took out some tools and got to work on his new Invention.

Meanwhile......

"Keep up, slowpokes!" Teased Rainbow Dash, way ahead of the path. "We'll be there soon!"

"Ugh....." exclaimed Rarity. "I'm running so hard, my hooves are creating clouds of DUST!" Rarity then sneezed multiple times.

"This is no time to worry about your appearance, Rarity." said Twilight. "Whatever is here in Ponyille, we need to meet it HEAD-ON!"

"She's right, sugacube." Applejack nodded.

"Well," huffed Rarity. "I'm just wondering if we could get there without engaging in filthy repercussions."

"I could teleport us, there," Thought Twilight. "But I'm too worn out right now to think about Magic."

"Do you really think it could be Team BLU that made that noise?" said Fluttershy.

"Oh boy!" exclaimed Pinkie. "I sure hope so! I want to give Scout these mopcakes for what he sent me in my letter!" Pinkie cringed at the thought of the extremities of the letter.

"What did that bad-dream do this time?" said Applejack, rolling her eyes. She remembered how Scout made herself and Demoman scrunch up as close as possible to one-another. On contact with her rump, Demoman's, ummm....."Apple Tree" bloomed in size. Yeah, good analogy....

"I......Don't wanna talk about it." replied Pinkie, still trying to spit the taste out of her mouth. "All you guys need to know is, I could feel his presence in some disgusting way." Pinkie cringed.

Nopony seemed to understand, so Pinkie whispered it in all of their ears.

"WHAT IN TARNATION?!" replied Applejack. "THAT'S SEVEN KINDS'A NASTY!"

"Not even MY magic can erase what you just told from my mind..." said Twilight, shaking her head.

"Ummmm...." said Fluttershy quietly. "That's....Gross...."

"Out of ALL the gross things to happen...." said Rarity, getting ready to reprise her award-winning Meme. "That is THE. GROSSEST. POSSIBLE. THING!" She cringed at what she had been told. She was glad Engineer wasn't like that. "WHY would you lick that off of your face, sweetie?!" Rarity pretty much screamed.

"I.......Thought it was icing....." Pinkie said disappointingly while hanging her head in shame. Everyone groaned.

"What was it?!" asked a Curious Spike.

"Spike.......SHUT UP." said Twilight with a hint of annoyed.

"I just want the truth." Replied Spike.

"YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" Yelled Twilight, gesturing for everyone else to keep walking.

"What's up with her?" Spike whispered to Fluttershy.

"Well, Spike..." replied Fluttershy. "She's got 99 problems, but a baby dragon isn't one of them."

"WHAT?!" Yelled Spike, still clearly confused.

"We'll tell you when you're older, Spikey Wikey!" said Rarity, nuzzling Spike's baby cheeks. Spike started drooling.

"Yes," replied Fluttershy with a nod. She then cowered. "Well, if that's okay with you, of course...."

Then, out of nowhere, Rainbow Dash came flying to the ground. Landing in front of the rest of the Mane 6 with three little creatures.

"Guys!" said Rainbow Dash. "These three said they can take us to whatever made that noise!" Everyone cheered.

"Is that right?" Asked Twilight. She had never seen creatures like these before. For one, they didn't have sparkles in their eyes like Hasbro gave them. Two, they had fingers, like Spike!

"Awww yeah!" Replied Damian with a smile.

"Follow us!" Said Kit.

"We know the way!" Said Tate.

Then, all three of the children realized what they were talking too. At the same time, they yelled "PONIES?!" They then ran off, screaming.

"Hey! WAIT UP, ya little jumping mutant sugary rectangles!!" Screamed Applejack. And with that, the chase was on.

------TO BE CONTINUED--------

Coming into Contact with The Common Cunt

Just as soon as Damian, Kit, and Tate had fled the scene, they were pulled back to reality just as quickly. Well, actually, wrangled back to reality with Applejack's random rope that she seems to pull out in the most need-able experiences. Applejack lassoed the three adolescents and tied them to a tree. While they squirmed with all of their might, no amount of Steroids could break a rope handled by Applejack.

"Sorry ta be so rough with ya, ummm....Whatever the hay ya are!" Yelled Applejack. "But I needed ta get you in position....."

"Po-Position?" Said Kit, obviously terrified. He didn't know what these Ponies were capable of.

"Yes," replied Twilight. "We have some......Questions to ask you...." Everypony else nodded.

"I'll start...." Said Pinkie with a serious expression, but it quickly turned into a big smile. "Would you like some CUPCAKES?"

"Cupcakes?" Said Kit, confused like a 10 year old should be. Pinkie nodded.

"You mean, you DON'T wanna eat us?" Said Damian, shivering. At this, Pinkie hung her head as she started to think about....The nightmare. A nightmare which she will NOT talk about.

"I thought I was over that.... "Thought Pinkie.

"If you didn't know, ponies don't eat meat. We are herbivores." Twilight said with a smirk

"You're a nerd is what ya are!" Replied Tate. Twilight scowled at this.....Uh oh.....

"SHUT UP, DUDE!" Screamed Damian, somehow elbowing Tate the slightest bit. "They'll EAT us!"

"We aren't gonna eat you." Said Rainbow Dash. "We just want to know.....Who made that noise?"

"You mean the REALLY loud noise?" Asked Kit. Everypony nodded. "Our dad and his friends."

"Can you please take us to your father? What a horrible father he must be...." Said Rarity with a scoff. "Letting you run off like some wild animals! I'll have to give him a piece of my mind!" Rarity stomped her hooves in disgust.

With this, the 3 boys got an evil Grin on their face.

"Before you do that....." said Damian. "Now it's our turn to ask YOU some questions!"

Applejack glared at the boys. "They're good....." she thought. "What'do ya need ta know?" She asked.

"Where are WE? And how are you talking to us?!" Asked the confused Tate. Everyone looked at the boy with the same look he had.

"What do you mean?" Asked Twilight. "Have you....Never seen talking Ponies before?" All the boys shook their head no. Everypony gasped.

"Just where are YOU guys from?" Asked Rainbow Dash.

"Yes," said Rarity. "There certainly isn't anything that looks like you 3 here in Ponyille!"

"That information is top secret." Said Kit with a grin. His brother chuckled. "We don't trust you Ponies...."

"YEAH!" Said Tate. "Especially TALKING ponies!"

"Well," explained Twilight. "We are able to talk....Because....Because....Yes!"

Spike snickered. "Good explanation, Lufisto." He said. Twilight just glared at him.

"Well.....OKAY!" Said Damian. "We'll take you to the scene of the noise." With that, Applejack untangled the rope, and the 3 boys we're free.

"And if ya'll even THINK about runnin' away, I'll have ta ride you like a Bull." Said Applejack. The boys cringed. They still didn't trust these Ponies, especially the Pink one. They didn't want any friggen cupcakes!

"Follow us!" Said Tate. And with that, the Mane 6, the Main Dragon, and the Main Morons were off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of-Oh shit, wrong type of Entertainment entirely!

Meanwhile.....

Pyro-Zi was now closer to town than before. Behind his current observatory, A.K.A, a bush, he spotted Freddie's children, six ponies, and one baby Dragon walking in the Distance.

"What in the? Computer!" Pyro-Zi quietly yelled. Then, all of a sudden, a medium sized Computer unwinded at Pyro-Zi's command. The computer could tell Pyro-Zi about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. Even about different towns lying in the Heart's of different dimensions.

"Yes, Emperor?" Asked the Robotic voice. "How may I assist you?"

"Where.....Am I?!" Yelled Pyro-Zi, not believing what he had just seen.

"Calculating....." Said the computer loading data. "You are in a town known as Ponyville, which resides in the continent of Equestria."

"Hmmmm.....Excellent! That will do for now, computer."

"Thank you for using me." And with that, the computer was off for the Moment.

"Ponyville? That would explain the Ponies....But the dragon? Hmmm....There must be a wide variety of species here. Like that bird-like monstrosity I encountered! I will need to keep a close eye on those Ponies, and their little dragon too!" With that, Pyro-Zi channeled his inner-Spy and cloaked himself. He would now be invisible until he was bored. "Swell......Now to investigate!" Pyro-Zi said with an evil cackle.

Random mothafucking Field......

Freddie was not happy. He never said he was a good parent. The proof is in the pudding, for pancake's sake, he Brought his kids to his line of Work EVERYDAY! And it was NOT a safe work Environment, either. But now.....They had run off, and god knows to where they even were. No one wanted to help look, they just wanted peace. And at the moment, Freddie was looking for his children QUIETLY, so he would not disturb the Zen place of his fellow Employees.

Ryback was still sitting idly by the Tree. He was surprised how quiet and peaceful this place was. He enjoyed peace, even though he was a juggernaut.

Nova and Ze were, of all things, playing Patty Cake with eachother. They tried to play quietly, though, so they wouldn't harm the Peace freely flowing through the air.

Austin Ross was surveying the Area. If he had his Gun with him, he could practice for WWE Fortress. He did have survival instincts, after all. But this damn Eye-Patch was getting on his nerves! He, of course, had his ignorant nephew to blame for It.

CM Punk had never drank a drop of Alcohol in his life, but right now, he REALLY needed some. He was stuck somewhere that he didn't even know. He just tried to think Positive, as he normally did.

Marcus Sims was being grumpy as usual. He wondered how CM Punk could be WWE Champion. Marcus knew he was better than Punk at everything, and, if given the opportunity, he could EASILY take his title. Then, he realized, he didn't even have his own title with Him at the Moment. This made him pissed, so he started kicking random Trees. Ryback got up and glared at Marcus, his peace being destroyed.

"Sorry..." Was all the terrified Marcus could say. With that, he sat down and just thought about where he was. Ryback grumbled.

What else would Zane and Nathan be doing, then Watching My Little Pony. With their headphones on, of course. They had a third Pair available for Freddie, but they didn't want to ask because they knew he was busy. About what, they didn't know, but they knew it must've been serious.

Freddie had had enough. He figured it was too dangerous to go into town, but he ran out of Options. He loved his children, and didn't want anything bad to happen to them. So, he decided he would be journeying off into Ponyville.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Screamed Freddie at the top of his lungs. Everyone stopped what they were doing immediately. Even Zane and Nathan heard it, so they took of their headphones.

"What the hell's your problem?" Asked Marcus, as he was obviously annoyed.

"BE BACK LATER GUYS, I GOTTA GO FIND MY KIDS-" But before he could finish his sentence, he heard the all so Familiar voice of Damian.

"DAD!" Then, Freddie saw his sons approach up the Mountain. They ran to him.

"Oh thank GOD!" Yelled an excited Freddie, hugging his sons as embarrassment fell on their face. "Where did you go? Don't EVER leave me again! You have no idea how worried I wa-"

"DAD!" Yelled Kit as loudly as he could. Freddie shut the fuck up.

"We......Found some people who want to see you guys." Explained Tate.

"What? Are we famous already?" Asked Punk with a smirk.

And then, they saw it. 6 ponies, one Dragon, walking intently down to where they were. On sight of, Freddie, Nathan and Zane's jaws dropped in awe.

"Can-Can it BEEEEEEE?" Said Zane with an exciting hint in his voice.

"IT-IT IIIIISSSSSS....." Nathan said slowly. Taking this all in.

"Hey, look." Said Nova. "Some animals escaped from the Zoo." With that comment, Zane kicked Nova in the nuts. Nova groaned loudly.

Ze laughed. "Ze thinks that is most funny!"

"Ummm......Dad? Guys?" Said Damian. "These are....."

At the same time, Zane and Nathan said it with enough electricity to power the town of Detroit. "THE MANE 6!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Who?" Asked Marcus. "No. They're just some damn ponies." Zane and Nathan shot him a glare.

All the Mane 6 and Spike could do was stare. There were.....MORE are them. Whatever they were, they looked quite odd.

In no instant, Zane and Nathan ran right up to the unsuspecting Ponies and Dragon, and stared at that with the creepiest smile ever known to Man....Or even Dolphin.

"Yup...." Said Applejack. "Told ya they were Jumping mutant graham-crackers. Only jumping mutant graham-crackers would have looks like that on their face....."

"Please, Applejack. Be nice." Said Twilight. "Hello, my name is-"

"TWILIGHT SPARKLE." said Zane and Nathan at the same Time. Freddie just chuckled. This was gonna be funny.

"Ummmm....." Said Twilight, not knowing what to think. "Yes.....And these are my Friends-"

"APPLEJACK, RAINBOW DASH, FLUTTERSHY, PINKIE PIE, RARITY, AND SPIKE!"

The Mane 6 and Spike just stared with their jaws agape. These people didn't look like they were from around here. But they certainly knew who they were.

"How did-How did you-" Twilight tried to ask.

"Shut up you two." Said Freddie, gesturing to Nathan and Zane. The two pouted. They couldn't believe they were in Ponyville! In front of their IDOLS! It was by far, the greatest day in their lives! "It's.....Kind of hard to explain....." He said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Spill the beans....." Said Rainbow Dash. She was pissed that whoever these people were had showed up instead of Sniper.

"Well......What would you like to know?" Freddie asked.

"EVERYTHING." said Twilight, not wasting anytime to get answers from these freaks.

And so Freddie told them EVERYTHING. About where they were from, about My Little Pony, about Television, about internet, everything they wanted to Know.

"WHOA." Said Twilight, halting the constant speaking. "Did you say you were.....HUMANS?" Freddie nodded. At this, Twilight got a creepy grin on her face that could rival Zane and Nathan's. Twilight started salivating at the word HUMAN.

"That pony has Rabies!" Yelled Marcus. "KILL IT BEFORE IT BITES US!" This earned him another glare from Zane and Nathan. Marcus just shrugged.

"I've been waiting for a Human to show up here for a WEEK....." Said Twilight, slowly approaching Freddie. "Would you all mind.....COMING TO MY LAB?!"

Everyone just stared at her, except Zane and Nathan, who smiled widely.

"Do you wish to experiment on us?" Asked Nathan. Twilight nodded while grinning evilly.

"This is a discovery of EPIC proportions!" Twilight explained. "Once word gets out that Humans are back in Ponyville.....And when I tell everyone that I discovered them....I'll be the most sought after Ponyville in all of Equestria!" Twilight then laughed an evil laugh.

"I take it that Humans don't show up here too Often." Austin asked.

"ONLY A HANDFUL, HOW LUCKY ARE YOU ALL?" Twilight's eyes started to spin. "AND WHEN MY EXPERIMENTS ARE DONE....I CAN MAKE A WHOLE ARMY OF HUMANS! I WILL BE THE MOST INTELLIGENT PONY OF ALL TIME!"

Applejack had had enough, she mule-kicked Twilight right in the face. Twilight was stunned, but quickly regained her composure.

"Ouch...." Twilight said, rubbing her head. "Sorry about that. That was Maniacal Twilight. She only shows up once in a while." Everyone just blinked at her.

"WAIT!" Rarity said. "So, since we have our own "Television Show"....Does that mean we are FAMOUS?!"

"YOU ARE THE MOST FAMOUS PONIES IN THE HISTORY OF PONIES!" Nathan and Zane said.

"Somebody catch me....." Rarity said, putting a hoof to her head. In a jiffy, Nathan and Zane had the white Pony in their arms.

"Ah don't mean to sound like a Bad Apple to ya'll.....But this is just WEIRD."

"You're telling me...." Said Punk. Rarity saw the 20 pounds of Gold on Punk's shoulder, and squealed.

"THAT-THAT MAGNIFICENT PIECE OF JEWELRY! Wherever did you get it?!"

Punk was confused, but looked at his Shoulder. "This? I won this." He said, proudly displaying it up in the Air.

"Showoff...." Marcus growled.

"May-May I.....HAVE IT?" Asked Rarity, begging.

Punk laughed out loud. "Are you SERIOUS?! Why would I give my Title to a fluffy marshmallow like You?!" Everyone else laughed.

"Hmph...." Scoffed Rarity. "Very well, then.....I guess I will have to use CHARM......" Rarity smirked, and gave Punk the look she always gave colts when she Wanted something. "May I PLEASE have that truly SPECTACULAR piece of Jewelry on your Shoulder?" She batted her eyes.

Again, all Punk could do was laugh. Rarity couldn't believe it! The look worked on everypony! "I think Freddie forgot to tell you Ponies something.....On Earth, we DO NOT mingle with Ponies. We are involved with our own Kind. But I thank you for making me laugh...."

"WHAT?!" Screamed Rarity. "Well, what role do ponies play where you are From?"

"They wallow in their own shit as stupid kids Pet their filthy coats." Everypony gasped. "They eat carrots all day, then eat the shit that carried the bits of carrots. It's quite entertaining to watch, actually." Marcus smirked at his Bold answer.

"Is that some kind of.....Cruel joke?" Said Rainbow Dash, mad at how these people lived. "Can they talk, at least?"

"Nope." Replied Sims, Rainbow Dash grew an angry Expression. "But, apparently here in ass-backwards land, they Do! How fucking great!?" Sims crossed his arms.

"You really should watch your language...." Twilight warned. "This is a peaceful place, and we don't need your insulting words."

"Ooooooohhhhhhhhh...." Sims said sarcastically. "My apologies, Ms. Purple Nurple......Who made you queen of this shit?!"

"Let me at him, Twilight!" Yelled Rainbow Dash. "I'll knock him back to Earth!"

"I can't let you do that, Rainbow Dash." Twilight replied. "But.....I have a backup Plan....."

Suddenly, Magic Tape covered Sims' mouth. He tried to rip it off, but only got zapped by it in the process.

"HOLY SHIT! SHE CAN USE MAGIC?!" Sims thought. Duh, dumbass.....

"Sorry about him....." Freddie apologized. "He just has.....A bit of a Temper." Everypony nodded.

"There anything else you incredible Things would like to know?" Zane asked, and Nathan nodded.

"Yes." Said Twilight. "But first....A suggestion...."

Zane and Nathan fell to their knees and bowed to their Queen, Queen Sparkle, the purple and loony. "Why, anything.....Your majesty!" The fan-boys said.

"I understand we are of great Importance where you are from," Twilight said. "But please, treat us as Equals." Twilight smiled.

"IMPOSSIBLE!" Nathan said. "WE LOVE YOU GIRLS AND WILL TREAT YOU AS GODDESSES"

Rarity blushed. "I say let them!" Everypony glared at her. "What? We have fans, darlings! We should capitalize!"

"Do ya want me to get mah Rope, Twi?" Applejack asked. With that, Zane and Nathan backed off.

"Nevermind!" Nathan said with fear. "Perhaps another time." Rarity frowned.

"Well, hey!" Pinkie said, finally getting in on the conversation. "So, what is all of your names? Are they cool names? I bet they are, ya know, since you're Humans and all! And, humans seem pretty cool, so, I was just wondering....."

"PINKIE!" Twilight screamed. "Let them talk." Pinkie nodded silently.

"Well," Nathan said. "My name is Nathan Bougeno, and this is my best Friend, Zane Dotson." They both smiled hugely.

"My name is Freddie Hediger. B.I.T." Freddie smirked.

"B.I.T.?" Applejack asked.

"Brony in Training." Freddie answered. Nathan and Zane nodded.

"What is a "Brony"?" Twilight asked.

"It's just what the Fans of My Little Pony are called." Zane answered quickly.

"I see...." Twilight replied.

"Ze believes at birth, that his name was announced to be Stephen Viking, but you can call Ze....Ze!" Ze said, confusing Pinkie Pie.

"Wow! Ze, you should meet our friend Trixie!" Rainbow Dash said. "She talks in third person...Like you!"

"Is she hot?" Nova asked. Ze facepalmed.

"Last time Ze checked, Ze noticed Ponies are NOT hot." Ze answered.

"Except Rarity...." Nathan mumbled, but Rarity heard, and started Blushing.

"She's......Charming, at best." Twilight answered and chuckled awkwardly.

"HE'S IN!" Nova answered for Ze. "See, bro? Told ya I'd score you a knockout!" Nova smirked at his accomplishment, even though he hadn't done shit.

"Ummmm.....Thanks?" Ze answered.

"My name's Austin Ross." Austin said, waving.

"Wow. Ya look an awful lot like Demoman." Applejack said, reminiscing.

"Wait...." Freddie said. "You guys know Demoman?!"

Applejack nodded. "They just left here last week. Mighty odd bunch of people, kind of like ya'll. But a hoot to hang around with, non-the-less."

"Whoa...." Nova said. "Team RED was here?!"

"Actually," Twilight said. "It was Team BLU, but Team RED came here too, to bring them home."

"Were they Ponies when they came here?" Austin asked.

"Yup!" Pinkie answered. "They were AWESOME! They saved Ponvyille like, EIGHT times!"

"Wow!" Freddie said, surprised. "Can't believe we missed them...."

Twilight smiled. "Well, hopefully the SECOND batch of humans will be more....Helpful in my quest to learn all I can about the species. I did not get much in the way of knowledge of your kind from Team BLU." She frowned.

"Ze believes you should've been more apprehensive. Yell at them to give them the information you desire, of you would turn crazy, like you did earlier, and PROBE them all!" Ze said boldly. Twilight just stared at him. "Ze is sorry for giving stupid ideas...." He then apologized.

"I wonder why they were Turned Ponies....But we WEREN'T?" Punk said.

"Not sure.....But I'm sure I can find out!" Twilight said, smiling.

"Anyway," Nova said. "My name is James Wilson, but I go by Nova. GOT IT?"

"Ummm...." Twilight said. "I'm pretty sure."

"GOOD." Nova said, giving the Ponies the stink Eye.

"Ya'll are mighty weird." Applejack stated the obvious.

"Well, if I may. You are all talking Ponies......" Austin stated.

"Yeh." Applejack said. "But we're used to that. Ya'll are just.....Out of this World!"

"Literally." Twilight said. Applejack nodded.

"My name is Phillip Brooks. But you can call me, C.M. Punk!" Punk said, Smirking.

"Why do ya'll have a real Name, AND a nickname?" Applejack said, curious.

"We'll explain later." Punk replied, not answering anything until he could trust these Ponies.

"Excuse me, Phillip?" Rarity said, getting used to the name. "Do you mind if I call you C.M. Gem?" Rarity suggested, still staring at Punk's title.

"Do you want me to pawn this Title off?" Punk said.

"OH NO! THAT WOULD BE A CRIME AGAINST JEWELRY!" Rarity yelled. Punk smirked.

"And these are my Children," Freddie said. "Damian, Kit, and Tate"

"Dad," Kit said. "Why are you telling these Ponies all of this?"

"Yeah!" Tate said. "How can we trust Them?!"

"Trust us." Twilight said. "We are the most Trustworthy Ponies you have ever met."

"We'll see about that....." Damian said. The ponies Gulped. What the hell where they gonna do?

"Boys," Freddie said. "........SHUT UP." With that, the 3 brats sat down and crossed their Arms. Pinkie giggled.

"And that grouch over, there," Punk said, gesturing to Marcus. "Is Marcus Sims." All Sims could do was flip Punk off.

"Hi, Marcus!" Pinkie said, hopping over. "Would you like a Cupcake?" Then, she started to Snicker. "Oh....I'm sorry...You're a little too shocked at the moment!" Pinkie busted up laughing, until Marcus grabbed her tail. Pinkie yelped, and that was all Ryback needed to come out of the Shadows.

Ryback grabbed Sims by the throat, and pressed him up against the Tree, slowly forcing the Life out of him.

What Sims was saying was muffled between the choking and the Tape, but Ryback suggested it was a very sincere "I'm sorry!" So he put him down Roughly.

"THAT. WAS. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!" Screamed Rainbow Dash. All Ryback could do was smile under his long black Hair.

"Oh, yes!" Said Punk. "I almost forgot, this is our big Homie, Ryback. He'll keep Marcus in line if he tries to hurt any of you."

"Oh," Pinkie explained. "He didn't hurt me, I was just surprised!"

"As long as Ryback gets to hurt Marcus, he doesn't care!" Freddie said while laughing.

"Ya'll seem like an odd Bunch." Applejack said, once again stating the obvious. "Mind if we try to get to know ya'll a little bit?"

"Sure." Austin said. "It seems as though Nathan, Zane and Freddie already know your names. But the rest of us don't watch the Show. So could you maybe....?"

"Ah," Twilight said. "Of course. My name, is Twilight Sparkle. Princess Celestia's number 1 student."

"I'm Rainbow Dash!" Dash said. "The fastest flier in all of Equestria.

"I'm Rarity," Rarity said, shaking her mane. "Fashion designer extraordinaire!" Punk snickered. "And may I say, Freddie....You have some eloquent hair!" Rarity said, noticing Freddie's purple fauxhawk.

"Oh? This? I look like a friggen rooster!" Freddie said. Everyone laughed.

"I think it looks WONDERFUL!" Rarity said. "Would you mind, later, if you show me how you get such a Hairstyle?"

"Of course!" Freddie said enthusiastically.

"I'm Applejack." The hick said. "Proud owner of one Quarter of Sweet Apple Acres!"

"I'm Pinkie Pie!" Pinkie said, jumping up and down. Soon, Nathan and Zane joined her in jumping. Everyone else facepalmed. "I'm Ponvyille's official Party planner!"

"WE WANT A PARTY!" Nathan and Zane shouted.

"OKAY! But it may take a while to plan, sooooo....Keep your horseshoes on." Pinkie said with a wink.

"I'm Spike!" The baby dragon said. "I'm Twilight's....."

"He is my assistant." Twilight answered with a Smirk.

"Uhhh, yeah....." Spike said.

"WHOA! Dragons can talk here, too?!" Nova said, amazed.

"Why, yes. Almost all species in Equestria can talk." Twilight answered.

"ZE'S JAW HAS BEEN DROPPED." Ze said. Nova took his hand a punched it back into place. Ze yelped in Pain.

"And who are you?" Punk said, gesturing at Fluttershy, who hadn't said a Word since they got here.

"Fluttershy....." The kind Pony said ever so softly. "I mean, if that's okay with you..." Fluttershy cowered.

"She's shy." Zane said. Nathan nodded. Ryback noticed Fluttershy's shyness, and walked up to her. Fluttershy cowered in fear.

"Hey, big guy, leave her al-" Rainbow Dash tried to say.

"Shhh...." Austin said. "He's just being friendly."

And it looks like the ever rare species known as the Rybackus, is slowly trying to get inside the pants of the extremely shy species known as the Fluttershisis. SHIT! The Rybackus has figured out, that the Fluttershisis, attains no pair of pants.....It would appear that the great Rybackus' plan to be horny, has all but failed....

Austin was right. All Ryback did was pet Fluttershy's flowing Pink mane. Fluttershy instantly felt better, and even gave Ryback a smile.

"Wow...." Fluttershy said, amazed. "For someone so BIG.....You are so kind." Ryback just smiled. He then petted all of the Other ponies, except he had a bit of trouble with Rainbow Dash.

"Ummm..." Dash said, embarrassed. "That's okay." Ryback just shrugged.

"Okay," Freddie said. "Now that we've gotten all of that out of the way. Let's get to know eachother." Freddie smiled.

"Well...." Twilight thought. "Where to start?"

Roommates

Pyro-Zi was watching, listening, analyzing the current situation. The ponies, the dragon, and the Wrestlers talked for quite a while. Sharing stories about Ponyville, the Elements of Harmony, and Equestria.

"So, how do ya'll know Team BLU?" Applejack asked curiously.

"Well," Freddie explained. "They are Humans, but they are from a different dimension that does NOT contain Earth. They are characters in a Video game. We have went to their World to walk in their shoes for a day, so to speak."

"You mean...." Twilight said. "Killing?" Everypony gasped.

"It's all in good fun." Austin said. "If we were Killers, we'd be in jail." Punk nodded.

"Well, what is your REAL job?" Twilight asked.

"WE'RE PROFESSIONAL WRESTLERS!" Zane and Nathan said, grinning widely.

"AWESOME!" Rainbow Dash yelled. "Wrestling is one of my favorite Sports!"

"There is Wrestling here in Ponyville?" Punk asked, surprised.

"Oh yes." Twilight replied. "It is one of the main Attractions, in fact."

"No wonder you all look so sweaty and smelly...." Rarity sniffed.

"That's why we have real Names and Nicknames. The nickname is our persona." Punk answered Applejack's earlier question.

"That's mighty impressive." Applejack said. "I've always wanted ta be a rassler. It fits me."

"I just can't believe you all would want to be involved in such a BARBARIC sport!" Rarity said.

"It's not THAT bad." Punk replied. "It gave me THIS." He proudly displayed his Title once again.

"You won THAT by Wrestling?!" Rarity asked, her jaw dropped.

"Yup." Punk replied. "It's considered the top Title. Which makes ME, the best Wrestler in the Company I work for."

"Nevermind!" Rarity said quickly. "I no longer have use for that sweaty Belt!" She cringed. Punk rolled his eyes

"I'm the owner of the Wrestling company," Freddie said.

"Wow, you must be like, SUPER SUPER SUPERY DUPERY RICH!" Pinkie Pie said hopping.

"Yup." Freddie said proudly. "It's too bad I don't have much of my money here at the moment." Freddie pulled out all of the money he had, which was $10,000.

"What's that?" Rainbow Dash asked, curious.

"This is Money." Freddie said. "It's what we use to buy things."

"Ha!" Rainbow Dash laughed. "That'll get you nowhere here. We use bits as our money."

"Will I be able to exchange all of this for 10,000 bits?" Freddie asked. Hoping to get the answer he was looking for. Everypony just looked at him like he was an idiot.

"Are ya crazy, Freddie?" Applejack answered. "Ya can't just come in here and ask for bits. Ya need ta EARN em'!"

"Son of a bitch......" Freddie mumbled under his breath.

"I think I have a theory on why we were not turned into Ponies on our arrival." Said Nathan.

"And that would be.....?" Twilight asked, curiously.

"Well," Zane explained. "Since Team BLU is an a Video game, which uses Animation, and you girls are in a TV Show, which uses Animation, the combined molecular structure enhances the appearance of anyone from a non-human point of view. Since we are Humans, and are not used for Animation, we stay ponies because our molecular structure is far different based on our designs. The only side effect we had as a result of coming through that portal, was being turned Animated ourselves."

".......Do what now?" Applejack asked, more confused than Anyone.

"In other words...." Nathan said. "We aren't made of the same Material as you ponies, Team BLU was. If we were like you to begin with, we'd be Ponies the second we stepped through that portal.

"Thank the Oncerian ruler I am an alien, and not some underdeveloped video game character...." Pyro-Zi thought.

So the new friends talked some more. After awhile, Twilight took the tape off of Marcus' mouth. He didn't talk much, he was too busy pouting, but at least he didn't try anything stupid.

"How is magic in your World?" Twilight asked.

"Magic?" Punk said, shocked. "All we have is those fake-ass magicians who try to do something spectacular, but always fail."

"Although," Freddie said. "We do have a substance named Orpheus...." Freddie said.

"Orpheus?" All of the ponies said at the same Time.

"It's a drug." Freddie explained. "When someone dies, they are injected with Orpheus and brought back to life within minutes. We only give it to people who deserve it, though."

All the ponies were impressed. "That's incredible!" Twilight said with a big smile. "So basically, you're cheating Death?"

"Not everyone deserves to die, ya know." Austin said. The ponies nodded.

"Say," Pinkie said. "How'd you get that eye-patch? Was it a horrible pogo accident?!"

Austin laughed. "No. My nephew.....Poked me in the eye with a Pitchfork." Austin said shamefully.

"Why would he do that? He's not a very nice nephew!" Pinkie said.

"It was during a wrestling Match. And yeah, he did it on PURPOSE!" Austin scowled.

"It was an accident, man." Freddie said. "And you know it was."

"No it wasn't. He is out to get me!" Austin said, looking around to make sure Jeff Ross wasn't anywhere around them.

"Ze thinks you look most stupid with that Eyepatch." Nova smirked.

"Does he ALWAYS state the obvious?" Rarity asked.

"Do you ALWAYS talk in that fake British Accent?" Punk replied with a sly smile.

"This accent is not FAKE." Rarity scoffed. "I will have you know, I have been talking like this since I was a little filly."

"If you say so...." Punk replied.

"If you wish to make fun of the way I talk..." Rarity began. "Then I will just have to make fun of your appearance. That beard makes you look like a hobo!" Everyone gasped

"You're just jealous that you don't have one." Punk said with a smirk.

"I do NOT wish to look like a male!" Rarity yelled.

"I thought you already were a Male!" Punk said boldly.

Rarity was starting to get frustrated. Her face was beaming redder by the moment.

"Go ahead, Punk." Marcus egged him on. "Kick her white Ass!"

"I don't beat women, let alone Ponies." Punk retorted. "You tail puller."

"So," Twilight said. "You don't hit mares, but you do in fact make fun of them?"

"I'm just kidding." Punk replied. "We aren't as nice as Team BLU, you guys. I AM going to spout out some insulting things sometimes, but I don't mean it. It's just my nature." Punk shrugged. "I'm.....Sorry, Rarity." He didn't say that too often, but he still didn't mean it, he only said it so a War of Words wouldn't blow up in his Face. From what Rarity had told the gang, which was about a 50 minute blab fest ONLY about herself, Punk thought she seemed like a total Snob. And CM Punk HATED snobs.

"Well....At least you apologized...." Rarity smiled. "But please, don't be so rude."

"You just need to lighten up a Bit." Punk said.

"How?" Rarity asked.

"Well for one," Punk began. "Get your white ass off of that pillow, and sit on the grass like normal People."

"I....." Rarity began. "Don't.....Want to get all dirty." Punk facepalmed.

"You CAN'T be serious." Punk said, starting to get mad. "You can always take a shower afterwards!"

"That is not the point" Rarity replied. "Dirtiness is next to, well, YOU."

"I'm not dirty, woman." Punk replied, disgusted. "And if I am, I am SOOOOOO SORRRRRYYY to insult the germ Police."

"You people need to calm down." Marcus said, smirking. "Be more....Like moi." Freddie snickered.

"Go pull some tails, Sims." Freddie replied.

"THAT WAS 40 MINUTES AGO!" Sims yelled.

"How about.....We all just TRY to get along?" Twilight suggested. "I know on your Planet, we are probably near the bottom of the food Chain. But in Equestria, we ARE the TOP of it. And we do NOT want to be disrespected." Twilight gave Punk and Sims stern looks.

"Are we being good, Twilight?" Nathan and Zane asked.

"The only two of you we seem to be having a problem with are Phillip and Marcus." Punk gulped, and Sims just waved it off.

"We are extremely sorry, girls." Zane said.

"Yes," Nathan began. "They will no longer be of a nuisance to you."

"My mouth is my own greatest Enemy sometimes." Punk said. "I'll be good. Once again, Sorry Rarity."

"Quite alright." Rarity smirked. "Just, PLEASE, do not try to change a ladies ways." Punk nodded.

"WELL?" Twilight said, looking at Sims. "Are we clear that there will be no more Tail pulling, or Arguing?"

All Sims did was rest his arms behind the back of his neck. "Ehhhhhh, can't promise anything." With that, Ryback stood right over Sims' chest. Sims' eyes grew wide.

"Just apologize, Sims..." Nova suggested. "These ponies are cool with the rest of us. So just swallow your damn pride before Ryback eats you."

Ryback glared at Nova, he had no intention to EAT him, just kill him. There is a strict difference.

"Fine....." Sims finally said. "I'm sorry, Pinkie Pie......"

"YAY!" Pinkie yelled. "Now, we're all BEST FRIENDS!" Pinkie hopped over to Marcus and hugged him tightly.

"I will MURDER Pyro-Zi when I find him......" Sims thought.

Zane and Nathan respectfully tried to kiss the hooves of the ponies, all of which except Rarity declined.

"We are NOT the princess, guys....." Rainbow Dash said. Getting sick and tired of all of this stupid Affection.

"You are more important to us then the Princess." Nathan and Zane smiled wickedly. The ponies just stared at them. Spike hoped they wouldn't try to kiss him like that.

Applejack quickly changed the subject. "Do ya'll have a place to stay?"

"I will dedicate my time here to become a Mole-Man," Sims said. "I will live underground, where no one can bother me."

"Awwwww," Pinkie said. "We can't let you do THAT!" She giggled. "You can stay at Sugarcube corner with MEEEEE!"

"Uh, no....." Sims said quickly. "There's no need for me-"

Then, Pinkie got up in his face. "PLLLLLEEEAASSSEEE? We can have LOTS of fun together!"

"Uuuuuggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....." Sims groaned ever so loudly. "FINE."

"YAAAAAAYYYYYY!" Pinkie started hopping in a circle around Sims. "You're my new best Friend, Marky!"

"DON'T call me Marky..." He cringed.

"Too late already did!" Pinkie giggled while Sims grred.

"Austin?" Twilight said. "Would you like to stay with me and Spike for a while at the library?"

"That'd be very nice." Austin said, nodding.

"My basket's off limits." Spike said, glaring at Austin.

"I'm pretty sure he won't be able to fit in your basket, Spike." Twilight playfully rolled her eyes.

"Rarity?" Nathan and Zane asked the pretty pony.

"Yes, boys?" Rarity smiled at the little creeps.

"May we accompany your acquaintance at Carousel Boutique for a while?" Nathan asked, Zane nodded.

"Why," Rarity began. "Of course!" Zane and Nathan smiled larger than ever before. Rarity would play her fans for all they were worth.

"Ummm, Ryback?" Fluttershy quietly asked the big guy. "I...Have an extra room at my quiet, peaceful Cottage. Would you.....Like to live there for awhile?" The big guy seemed to like peace and quiet, and Fluttershy knew her cottage would be the best Place for him.

Ryback smiled, and nodded. Fluttershy smiled too. She just hoped the animals would take a liking to him like she seemed too.

"Me and the Apple Famleh could use some help at Sweet Apple acres." Applejack said, throwing out the question. "Whose up for sum hard work?"

"Me and the Boys are anything but out!" Freddie replied, smiling. "I wanna prove myself as a hard worker around here."

"Good ta know." Applejack said. "But, are ya sure yur boys are up ta the challenge?"

"We can do anything!" Damian said, smirking.

"Yeah! We're awesome!" Kit said boasting.

"I like trains." Was all Tate could say. Applejack giggled.

"I'm sure ya'll will be a big help!" She said. The boys nodded.

"I'm up for some work, too, Miss." Said Punk, smirking.

"Wow, Applebuck Season will be a piece of cake with all ya'll around!" Applejack was ecstatic about all the helpers she had gotten today.

"So," Rainbow Dash said, gesturing to Nova and Ze. "I guess that leaves you two. You cool, right?"

"We're cooler than a cucumber's cunt!" Nova said. Rainbow Dash laughed uproariously.

"Oh yeah! You guys are cool!" She said with Tears in her eyes.

"Ze does not see what is so fun-" Ze tried to talk, but Nova quickly elbowed him in the gut.

"Shut up, man." He whispered, "We've got her in the palm of our hand!" Ze chuckled at how Nova wanted to get this Pony in bed. He figured he was probably just trolling.

"Okay." Twilight said. "We now have our living arrangements filled. But, we have ONE more question..."

"Shoot." Austin said.

"How did you all get here?" She asked.

Pyro-Zi gulped from afar.

----TO BE CONTINUED------

Meeting the Princess

"Well...." Austin explained. "Back on Earth, just like you ponies had to defeat the likes of Discord and Nightmare Moon, we sometimes have a bit of a Problem, in a man named Emperor Pyro-Zi"

"Oooohhh....." Pinkie said. "He sounds evil!"

"He is...." Austin continued. "His goal is to take over Earth. Because you see, he did not originally live on Earth. He lived on a Planet, far far away, called Planet Onceria. He is a very smart Alien, and has created many devices, most of which could leave to the end of civilization as We know it." The ponies started gulping, Rainbow Dash didn't seem impressed, though.

"Yes, I AM pretty good, aren't I?" Pyro-Zi thought.

"One invention he created," Austin continued. "Is called the Dimensionomicon. It teleported all of us from Earth....To here. How his technology is advanced enough to do that, I don't know. The device was too strong for him to handle, though. And he was teleported here along with us."

"Where is this 'Pyro-Zi' now?" Twilight asked. He seemed dangerous enough, if he got into Ponyville, it might be hard to stop Him.

"Well," Punk said. "As soon as we landed in this field here, I saw him. A few seconds later....He was gone."

Pyro-Zi smirked. He loved how these puny Humans feared him so. He would make sure these ponies felt the same Way.

"He can't be THAT hard to beat." Rainbow Dash said, unimpressed with the Alien's accolades.

"Don't say that, Dash." Freddie warned. "Honestly, you can't underestimate this Man. He is bad to the bone!"

"What does this lil' guy look like?" Applejack asked. Just then, Zane printed out a picture of Pyro-Zi off of his laptop.

'Here ya go" Nathan said. handing the picture to Applejack.

Rarity gasped when she saw the Alien. "He has a FANTASTIC taste in skin color!" Punk rolled his eyes again.

"Is the color purple the Father of your child, or something?" Marcus snickered.

Rarity glared. "It is my favorite color."

"Hey," Punk said. "Shut your mouth, MAARRRKKYYYY." Marcus scowled. DAMN that Pink piece of crap.

"Don't start...." Marcus grumbled.

"Marky!" Pinkie said. "Your nickname is AWESOME! Don't be all saddy wad wad about it!" She giggled.

"Were you dropped on your head the second you came out of your mother's pussy hole?" Marcus asked without hesitation. "Just wondering..."

"Actually," Pinkie began. "It was a minute after, not a second after. Thank you very much, MARKY!" Sims' eyes grew wide. He would soon have to LIVE with this-this-THING....

"Okay." Twilight said. "We'll be on the lookout for Emperor Pyro-Zi"

"Yeah!" Rainbow Dash enthusiastically. "And once we find them, we'll kick them up into the clouds!"

"WHOA." Nova said, just now figuring something out. "Dash. You're a pegasus. So, that means you live in the clouds, right?"

"Oh yeah!" Dash said, remembering. "That means you two can't come up there with me unless you're both Pegasus, too."

"Ze will just have to stick his head in the ground like an Ostrich, then." Ze said.

"I can fix that!" Twilight said. "I have a spell that can turn you ALL into ponies!" Everyone else seemed to like the idea, except Sims, who groaned so damn loud.

"I don't wanna be a damn Pony!" Sims screamed.

"And just WHAT is your problem with Ponehs, Sims?" Applejack asked, glaring at Marcus.

"I....." Marcus didn't want to answer THIS. ANYTHING but this.... "I've...Had some bad experiences with Ponies.....Please don't make me talk about it...." Sims looked at the ground sadly.

"Oh...." Applejack said thoughtfully. "Ah-Ah didn't know...."

Sims sighed. "I guess......I can take being a Pony for a while...." He sniffled.

"First," Twilight began. "We really should assemble a meeting today by Town Hall. It's only 9:30 in the morning, and I'm sure the rest of Ponyville would be glad to meet you all."

"We're in." Freddie agreed, speaking on behalf of everyone else. "Call the Mayor. Mayor.....What's the Mayor's name? Zane, Nathan?"

"MAYOR MARE!" Zane and Nathan yelled at the same Time, smirking at their knowledge of their favorite Show.

"Wow," Freddie said, not surprised at the name Lauren Faust had given the Mayor. He knew it was a children's TV Show, though, so he would let it Slide. "Okay, then. Call Mayor Mare!"

"Will do." Twilight said, nodding. "Rainbow Dash, go to Town Hall, and ask the Mayor to let all the other citizens know that a meeting will be starting soon."

"Got it!" Rainbow Dash said, quickly flying off.

"We will soon also have to introduce you guys to Princess Celestia, too." Twilight put forth the idea.

"As long as Princess Luna is there," Nathan said, "We're in!" Zane nodded.

"Out of 10, how understandable would you say the Princess is?" Austin asked.

"Twenty...." Twilight confidently said.

"Then we've got nothing left to lose!" Punk said, smiling. "Sure. We'll meet your majesty."

"Ah would like to suggest somethin', though," Applejack said. "Keep Marky on a leash. Her majesteh will not take kindleh to being gutter-mouth talked."

"Good idea." Freddie said. "Just keep your mouth shut the Whole time, MARKY!" Freddie snickered.

"Shut your ass up, and you've got a deal." Marcus scowled.

"I'll think about it...." Freddie replied, smirking. Marcus growled.

Pinkie laughed. "You guys are SOOO FUNNY! I can't wait to hang out with you all!"

"Neither can WE, Pinkie." Zane said.

"Yeah, we can make some CUPCAKES together." Nathan said with a wink.

"Ummm..." Pinkie said, remembering her nightmare once again. "We'll-We'll see..." She said hesitantly.

"We have a story we'd like you to read, Pinkie." Zane said with a sly smile on his face.

"A story?" Pinkie said, once again getting her Happiness back. "Is it about me?" Zane and Nathan nodded. "OKAY!" Pinkie went over to the computer, and started reading the story Zane had searched nearly seconds before.

Freddie quirked an eyebrow. "What are you creeps planning?" He whispered to Nathan.

"You'll see...." Nathan said with a chuckle.

"Cupcakes," Pinkie read. "By Sergeant Sprinkles. I like his name!" She giggled.

"Trust us," Zane said. "You'll like the story, too!" Nathan nodded.

///////////////

Equestria....

Town Hall....

///////////////

Rainbow Dash was at the Town Hall in a jiffy. She opened up the large double Doors to go inside, and was met instantly with The Mayor's secretary, Crooked Glasses.

"Ah," Crooked said. "Rainbow Dash! What can I do for you?"

"I need to speak to the Mayor. It's really important." Dash answered.

"Well, most ponies would need to schedule an appointment in order to talk to the Mayor," Crooked said. Rainbow sighed. "BUT....The Mayor is always welcome to see any Element of Harmony right away!" Rainbow Dash smirked.

"I knew being the Element of Loyalty had it's perks!" Rainbow Dash thought.

Then, Crooked buzzed into the Mayor. "Mrs. Mare? Rainbow Dash is here to see you."

"Send her in, Crooked."

"Yes, Ma'am." She then took her hoof off of the intercom buzzer. "The Mayor will see you now." She smiled.

"Thanks!" Rainbow replied. With that, she went into the Mayor's office.

"Rainbow Dash!" Mayor said excitedly. "So good to see you! What can I do for you?"

"Hiya, Mayor" Rainbow said with a smile. "Did you hear that noise a while ago?"

"Oh, yes! It ruptured my train of Thought. Surely it must be Team BLU, returning back to Ponyville." Mayor said.

"Weeeeelllll, not exactly..." Rainbow said with a nervous smile.

"Then, what was it?" Mayor asked.

"That's why I came here." Rainbow said. "We wanted to know if you could gather all of Ponyville's citizens together for a Meeting."

"Of course! I assume everything will be explained at the Meeting?" Mayor asked.

"That's the plan." Rainbow answered, nodding.

"Alright then..." Mayor said. And with that, she said into the Town loudspeaker, "Citizens, of Ponyville, you must all gather at the Town Hall immediately. A meeting will be Beginning shortly....Thank you."

"Thanks, Mayor!" She waved goodbye to the Mayor, and on her way out, she waved goodbye to Crooked Glasses. And she was off after that.

Back at the Field....

Pinkie Pie screamed, VERY loudly. Her usually curly, poofy Mane, had now been reduced to her Old-School long hair. She quickly closed the Monitor on Zane's laptop and ran off. Zane and Nathan looked at Pinkie confusingly, they didn't expect her to be THAT creeped out of the story.

"Good going, Zane!" Yelled Nathan. "Now she's upset!"

"I-I didn't know she'd take it that Badly!" Zane said, not meaning for this to have happened.

"What in tarnation did you fools Do?!" Applejack yelled at Zane and Nathan.

"WE DON'T KNOW!" Zane and Nathan said at the same Time.

"We just told her to Read a Story, that's ALL!" Nathan said.

Applejack started to read the Story too. After a while, she gasped, and put a Hoof to her mouth.

"What is it?" Fluttershy asked.

"That......" Applejack began. "Was the EXACT same Nightmare Pinkie had a while ago!"

"She killed Rainbow Dash and made her body Parts into cupcakes?!" Nathan asked, mortified.

"Yup." Applejack said, sighing. "She told me the whole Nightmare, evereh detail, evereh nook and Cranny. And this here storeh is the exact same Thing!"

"How-HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!" Zane asked.

"Well," Austin said. "It could be the case of the text Being mightier than the Mental Capacity. When something as horrible as that story was written, it must've somehow hopped dimensions and landed into Pinkie's brain."

"But HOW?!?!" Zane and Nathan asked.

"Not sure." Austin answered. "But it's the only logical Explanation that makes Sense."

"Hmmmm...." Pyro-Zi thought. "Austin is much more intelligent then I give him credit for. When I have a plan, I'll have to make sure he is the first to Die!"

"PINKIE!" Nathan and Zane yelled. "COME BACK-WE'RE SORRY!" Ryback also went off to help look.

"Wow..." Marcus said. "I thought I'd be the first One to make her cry."

"You aren't helping, MARKY." Nova teased. Ze chuckled.

"I thought we established that you suckers would SHUT UP about that....." Sims said angrily.

"Ze believes that we were pulling Your chain." Ze said. Sims groaned.

Meanwhile

Apparently, Pinkie Pie was so sad, she couldn't run fast Enough. Because Zane, Nathan and Ryback quickly caught up to her.

"WAIT! PINKIE!" Zane yelled, this caused the Pink pony to stop all-together.

"Y-yeah...?" Pinkie said, sniffling.

"We are SOOOOO sorry!" Nathan said. "Applejack told us about the Nightmare. We had NO IDEA that the story we were showing you was the actual Nightmare!"

"But..." Pinkie said. "How can this Author from another Dimension, write a story about my Nightmare? He doesn't live here! He doesn't know what makes me tick!"

"We think," Zane said. "That the story was so horrible, that it somehow connected with your mind from Earth."

"How in the hell does that Work!?" Pinkie yelled. "None of this makes any sense!"

"We know, Pinkie." Zane said, comforting her. "But if we knew that Story was actually your Nightmare, we would've never showed it to you!"

"Can you ever forgive Us?" Nathan asked sincerely.

Ryback picked up the cute pony, and gave Her the biggest Hug he had ever given. That did the trick. Slowly, but surely, Pinkie Pie smiled again, and her long hair had been reformed to the hairstyle Zane and Nathan had grown to love.

"Of course I can, you guys!" Pinkie said, earning "THEW'S" from Zane and Nathan. "You're my friends now!" Zane and Nathan got in on Ryback's hug on Pinkie, with immediately made Ryback back off. After all, he wanted to hug Ponies, not Fags.

"Now," Pinkie began. "How can you guy's READ that story?! It's so sad....."

"We didn't think it was Sad before." Zane said. "But now that we know what it's actually caused....."

Nathan finished Zane's sentence. ".....WE HOPE THAT SERGEANT SPRINKLES BURNS IN HELL."

Pinkie giggled. "Ya know what? ME TOO! Comeon, let's get going. We've got a meeting to go to!"

With that, the four friends walked off towards the Meeting. But Pinkie still couldn't help but think of her Nightmare, which was apparently, the work of some sick bastard, who gets his Jollies writing stories scary enough to spring herself into a Mental Breakdown at any Time.

A few Minutes Later.....

Town Hall.....

Every living, breathing Citizen of Ponyville had arrived at the Town Hall within minutes. They knew that their Mayor didn't fool around, and when she called a Meeting, it usually meant something of catastrophic Importance had come About.

"Good day, Citizens of Ponyville." Mayor announced. "I am sorry to schedule this Meeting on such short Notice, but there is something that the Elements of Harmony have learned of just a while ago. The floor is yours, Twilight."

"Are you sure you're Okay, darling?" Rarity whispered to Pinkie.

"Yup!" Pinkie giggled. "I am as okay as okay can be!" Rarity highly doubted that, and her doubts were correct. Pinkie was feeling like absolute CRAP right now. She had to relive her nightmare once again...At least it was in the form of Text, this time.

"Thank you, Mayor" Twilight said. "Citizens of Ponyville....It is of great pleasure, that I announce to you, that the noise you all experienced earlier this Morning, was not a new Villain." Everypony sighed in relief. They didn't want to have to deal with another Discord. "In fact..." Twilight continued. "It was a group, of new HEROES!" Everypony cheered. They doubted they were as good as Team BLU, but they were still happy to know that they were good.

With that, the Curtains opened up, and Austin, Punk, Freddie, Ryback, Marcus, Ze, Nova, Zane, Nathan, Damian, Kit, and Tate were revealed to the Audience. Many gasps were heard, and whispers, ponies asking eachother "What are they?"

"These men....And children...." Twilight continued. Damian, Kit, and Tate waved. "Have come here, from Earth. They.....Are humans." Twilight said the last sentence with a smile. Immediately, the crowd started whooping and Hollering. "Therefore, this, is a great Day......Ponvyille is the first town in Equestria, to ever inhabit, a real life, Human being, and now, we have more visitors from where they come from!" More cheers and applause are heard. Nova started flexing his lack of muscles.

"But," Twilight continued. "With good news, there is always some bad News." Some citizens started to get worried looks on their faces. "I will allow this man, to explain the current situation..." With that, Austin went up to the podium.

"Hello, Ponyville." Austin said, putting his arm's behind his Back. "We are very happy to Be here." Everyone cheered. "I know what you must be thinking. Who are we? And why do we look so weird? Well, we, are humans, from the planet Earth. And this is what all Humans look like. It's just natural. How we were sent here, is not TOO hard to explain. Well, let me first tell you, our job Occupation. on Earth, we, are Professional Wrestlers." Many of the citizens started cheering, especially the Men. "Thank you," Austin continued, smiling. "In the company we work for, though, there is a man, an EVIL man, capable of World Domination." Some people gulped in fear. "Originally, he did not live on our Planet. He is an Alien, who lives far out in the Galaxy, on a Planet called Onceria. Basically, he's evil Alien all day, but also works as a Wrestler at night..." Some people laughed. "He is EXTREMELY smart, he has many Inventions known to his name. One of which, is called The Dimensionomicon."

"What it does, is simple. It sends people to different Dimensions. Why it sent us to this one? I don't know. I'm not even sure if the creator of the Invention knows. All I know is, this man did not know the Power of his own Creations, because inevitably, his own Device sent him here, along with us. Along with this device, this man, has many other Inventions, most of which could be a disaster to Equestria. This man.....Is fearfully known in the Wrestling locker-room, and around our Galaxy...." Then, Austin hit a button on the podium, unraveling a large Picture of Pyro-Zi, visible to the whole audience. "As Emperor....Pyro-Zi." The audience gasped.

"Yes," Austin continued. "He sure is ugly, isn't He?" Everyone laughed, even though they shouldn't have. Because very close to the stage, Emperor Pyro-Zi was silently growling in cloaked form. "Now.....Ross will DEFINITELY die first!" Pyro-Zi thought.

"Be on the look out, for this Dangerous man. If you see him, IMMEDIATELY talk to any of the Elements of Harmony," Austin gestured to the 6 most important ponies in all of Equestria, well, besides the princesses, of course. "They will spring into action as quick as Possible. Now, we don't know if the Elements of Harmony will be able to defeat Pyro-Zi by themselves." Rainbow Dash nodded yes, signaling that she thought they would be able to. "I've heard much about them, but I won't be able to tell until the Battle begins. Also, take note, that quite Soon, Team BLU will be back here in Ponyville." Everyone cheered. "They will be a big help in the Battle against Emperor Pyro-Zi. But, if we are able to find Pyro-Zi before BLU gets here, we will have to do what we can until they arrive. Or, if the Elements of Harmony ARE strong enough to defeat him by themselves, that's fantastic, too. I would like to apologize to you all. I wish we could've atleast been sent here without Pyro-Zi, but alas, it's never that easy, is It? Oh, pardon me. We really should introduce ourselves! My name, is Austin Ross." Austin walked off of the podium, and Freddie walked up to it.

"My name, is Freddie Hediger. And, I know this may sound stupid. But, does ANYBODY know where I can get 10,000 bits?" Freddie asked, hoping he wouldn't get made fun of. Someone who had LOTS of bits walked up onto the Stage. Diamond Tiara's father, Filthy Rich.

"I have 10,000 bits Mr. Hediger, it's chump change for me!" Filthy exclaimed, Freddie beamed with happiness. "What exactly do you need it for?"

"Well," Freddie explained. "On Earth, I have quite a bit of Money too." Freddie said. "But, I have learned, that my 10,000 in earth Money will serve me no use here. I earned this Money, and I believe I am entitled to get the same Amount I have in bits." Freddie then asked the crowd, "DON'T YOU ALL AGREE?!" They all cheered, supporting this fool who they knew nothing about. Shows how smart they Are.

"Well," Filthy replied. "What are you willing to trade in exchange for 10,000 bits?"

"How about my 10,000 in earth Money?" Freddie said nervously. "It's literally, out of this world Currency. You would be the only one with something like it in Ponyville."

Filthy thought about it for a moment. "Fine.....It seems I have run out of Coal. So I need SOMETHING to fuel my giant Fireplace." Freddie was disgusted, only Bums used Money for that! "Oh, Butt Ler! Oh, BUTT LER!" Filthy called. Suddenly, a random White colt in a butler's Uniform ran up on Stage.

"Yes, sir?" Butt Ler asked.

"Make yourself useful, and Bring me one of my Many bags of 10,000 bits." He ordered.

"Right away, sir." With that, Butt Ler ran off, putting his 1 bit a Month job to good Use. A moment, later, he returned with a seemingly LARGE bag of Bits.

Freddie gasped as Butt Ler gave the Bag to Filthy, who in turn gave the bag to Freddie in exchange for the $10,000. Freddie looked at the bag, with his eyes bugged out beyond Belief. He looked inside, apparently, Equestria used the same gold Earth did. Freddie could wait until he got back to Earth, and sell all of this Gold and become close to being a TRILLIONAIRE! He didn't have much more to think About, though, and he fainted on the wooden Floor soon after.

"Hmph." Filthy said, walking off the stage, counting the Earth money he now Possessed. Ryback just gingerly carried Freddie off of the stage, and sat him down gently in a Wagon.

"He'll be fine, don't worry." Punk said, this made the Audience seem to calm Down. "HI! My name, is Phil Brooks. But, my Wrestling name, is CM Punk. So please, call me that." Punk walked off the podium, and Nova stepped up.

"HI DUR. HURR HURR. MAH NAME IS NOVVVVVAAAAA. AND I LIKE BUTT-SAUCE." Everyone just stared at the young Outsider, and then started to laugh uproariously."HURRRRR HURRRRR. THANKS FA LAUGHING AT MEH. I WILL MAKE LOVE TO YOU ALL." With that, he stepped off of the podium, the laughing had stopped Now. Everyone just looked at him creepily. They would all be locking their doors tonight. Ze stepped up.

"Ze's real name is Stephen Viking, but you will call Ze....Ze. Also, Nova licks doorknobs." Nova kicked Ze in the nuts, which caused an abrupt end to Ze's fantastic speech. Many laughed as Ze groaned in pain. Nathan now stepped up.

"I LOVE YOU ALL!" He then walked off, everyone looked oddly at Nathan.

"Oh," Austin said. "We forgot to mention one thing. Where we are from, you all are quite Famous. So congratulations." Everyone cheered loudly. "YEEEEAAAHH!!!!! I'M FAMOUS!!!!!" Screamed Horsepower. Zane now walked up.

"I am going to love and Tolerate....THE CRAP OUT OF ALL OF YOU. Especially Derpy." He walked off now, as well. This time, everypony cheered. Though these humans seemed a bit too weird for their tastes, they still appreciated the fact that they were important to them. Derpy was so happy, her eyes did 360 degree turns. Kit, Tate, and Damian stepped up.

"Hey, we're Freddie's sons." Damian said. The crowd awed.

"And...We still don't trust all you Ponies." Kit said. He gave them all the side eye.

"I......Like Cars." Was all Tate said. Everyone just clapped awkwardly.

"YEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!!!" Horsepower screamed. "I LIKE CARS TOO!!!!!!!! I don't know what they are....But I bet they RUUULLLEEEEEE!!!!!!!!"

"And that big guy over there," Punk said, gesturing to Ryback. "Is Ryback. He eats 7 square meals a Day." Ryback angrily nodded no at Punk, it was only 6. He then waved to the crowd. Finally, Marcus was the last to step Up.

"I...." Marcus started. "Am Oliver Clothesoff. I will kill all of you fools in your sleep." Everyone in the Audience gulped, they had another Killer in town it seemed.

Ryback stepped up to Sims, and threw him straight off the Stage, to where he landed on his ass. He groaned in pain, as Punk stepped up to the mic again.

"Don't listen to him, folks...." Punk said, almost like a warning. "His name is Marcus Sims, you are free to harm him physically whenever you please." Everyone laughed. Ponyville had seemed to take a liking to these strange characters after such a Short time. Nova, Ze, and Sims they were unsure of. But they just figured they had no Brains, which they were right about.

"We'll say it again," Punk continued. "We will be here for a while, so please. Don't be afraid to talk to us, us Humans like to talk, believe it or not. And if we offend you in any way, please.....HURT us. Especially the jackass on the floor over there." Punk said, gesturing to Sims, who could do nothing but flip Punk off. "Ohhhh....Fiesty!" Punk said. Everyone laughed. "Once again, thank you all for allowing us to stay here without any backlash. We will see you all aro-"

Before Punk could finished.....He vanished. Not only him, but Ryback, Freddie, Austin, Marcus, Ze, Nova, Nathan, Zane, Damian, Kit, Tate, Twilight, Spike, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack had vanished as well. All the citizens scratched their heads with their hooves in confusion, wondering where everyone had gone.

"That's strange.....Where did they go?" Pyro-Zi thought.

One teleportation later.....

The answer was simple. Right in front of the 18, were Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. Both princesses were smiling at Twilight and her friends, but were sharing curious looks at the 12 humans

"Hello, everypony." Princess Celestia opened up the conversation. "We've been expecting you...."

--------TO BE CONTINUED---------

Kill Or Be Killed

"Princess Celestia!" Twilight screamed excitedly, she hadn't expected to be seeing either of the princesses Today. "And Princess Luna!" The two princesses smiled at Twilight.

"Hello, Twilight Sparkle." Luna said with a nod. "And friends."

"To what do we owe the pleasure?" Zane and Nathan asked, bowing. All of the Outsiders were bowing, even Marcus, but he was doing so with a scowl on his face.

"Well," Celestia explained. "Spike sent me a letter, explaining there was a captivating noise, and that new faces had arrived. He asked me to teleport you all here so I could see you."

Spike chuckled nervously as Twilight stared at him. "What?!" Spike said. "You didn't say WHEN they had to meet the Princesses."

"Your majesties," Austin said. "We just want to tell you first hand, how honored we are to be here in Equestria, and that we plan to be on our BEST behavior. ALL of us. RIGHT?" He was glaring at Marcus during that last sentence.

"I already said I would." Marcus said, the unpleasant look on his face.

"We are honored to have you." Luna said. "Spike mentioned you were humans, from Earth?"

"That is correct." Freddie said.

"How were you sent here from a different Dimension?" Luna asked. "I hope you do not have plans to take over our fair Kingdom. Because if you do," Luna then gave an evil Stare to all of the evil Outsiders. "YOU WILL BE SORELY DISAPPOINTED." Nova and Ze gulped.

"No, no!" Freddie exclaimed. "Nothing of that nature, princesses. There is a story behind our arrival."

"Please tell us." Celestia said.

Nova started singing some very fitting music, if you can even call it Music. All he did was make random noises.

"What are you doing?" Luna asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"I'm making fitting music. It goes with this epic Tale." Nova answered with a shrug. Luna and Celestia giggled, signaling for Nova to start again, so he did.

Austin cleared his throat, and told the story for the THIRD time today. "On Earth, our occupation is that of Professional Wrestlers. One of our co-workers, has a second job in part to being a Wrestler, he invents things. Many things. He does this, because he plans to take over our planet. He wishes for this, because he is not originally from our Planet. He is an Alien, from a planet far out in the Galaxy called Onceria. One of his many inventions, is called the Dimensionomicon, it's purpose is to send others to different Dimensions. We were chosen as the recipients of the teleportation. The creator of this device, however, did not know the extent of it's Power, as he too was also sent here to Equestria along with us. This man, goes by the name, of Emperor Pyro-Zi. And I'm sorry to say, he is most likely planning to take over all of Equestria." Austin could barely breath because he had told the story in the span of a minute. Nova continued with his epic music even after the Story was over, so Ze put his hand over his mouth.

"We know it's a very odd story," Punk said. "But you HAVE to believe us."

"Honestly...." Celestia began. "Your story is far more believable than that of Team BLU." The Outsiders smiled.

"BUT," Luna said. "That does NOT mean we trust you."

"Sister, please..." Celestia said, halting Luna's words. "We trust you all fully. And we appreciate you telling us of the danger that is ahead." Luna scowled.

"Thank you, princesses." Nathan and Zane said.

"You are.....Welcome." Luna struggled to say, still getting used to being nicer than before. "But, the Elements of Harmony will easily dispatch of this 'Pyro-Zi'. They have defeated the likes of several others before him."

"We hate to disagree," Austin retorted. "But we warn you, do not count out Pyro-Zi too quickly. He is an evil Mastermind. But, his recent plans to take over Earth have not gone over as he planned."

"See?" Luna smiled. "Nothing to worry about."

"I believe it IS something to worry about, dear sister." Celestia said, once again disagreeing with her sister. "While the Elements of Harmony have defeated plenty of evil before, I trust these humans' judgement. If they say that this man is evil, than he surely is evil."

"Pyro-Zi has another character trait that will work to our advantage," Austin said. "He is slow to follow up on his plans, and we have been told that Team BLU will be returning soon. We know Team BLU, you could say...We are associates with them. They visit our dimension regularly. As the girls have told us, BLU helped saved Equestria numerous times, so we fully believe that by the time Pyro-Zi begins his attack, BLU will have already arrived. And they will foil his plans as well."

"If the inevitable occurs," Celestia said. "Such as BLU not returning in time, will you be of any help to save Equestria?"

"Princess," Freddie said. "We are skilled in Wrestling, Muai Thai, and other forms of ancient brawling. We promise you we will try our best to aid Equestria during the troubled Times." The princesses smiled and Nodded.

"Thank you, once again." Luna said. "Your bravery is....Admiring. We must ask you, though, that you let Twilight Sparkle turn you into Ponies."

"Why?" Marcus asked, not happy about Luna's statement.

"Because," Luna explained. "If you are kept in Human form, then other Citizens will become scared and frightened off your appearances. Many other ponies have never seen anything quite like you men, they will then overreact, thinking YOU are the enemy. And you obviously aren't. You are HEROES." Luna smiled.

"No disrespect in your judgement, Princess," Punk said. "But we are just average Joe Human beings. We are anything but Heroes."

"Oh," Celestia said. "But you ARE! You warned us of a very powerful entity's attack before it occurred. Now, we know who and what to look out for. Equestria is forever grateful for what you have told us today." Celestia sincerely smiled.

"We thank you, princess." Austin said. Everyone bowed once again.

"We must know..." Luna said. "What are your names?"

Austin began. "I am Austin Ross."

"Freddie Hediger." Freddie said.

"My real name is Phillip Brooks," Punk said. "But I prefer to be called C.M. Punk."

"My name's James Wilson," James said. "But I like Nova better."

"Ze's birth name was Stephen Viking, but Ze likes to be called Ze best." Ze answered.

"Nathan Bougeno." Nathan said.

"Zane Dotson." Zane answered, smiling Hugely.

"Marcus Sims." Marcus said.

"He also goes by Marky!" Pinkie said, hopping.

"I do NOT go by Marky, your majesties." Marcus said, glaring at Pinkie. The princesses just giggled.

"I'm Kit." Kit said.

"Damian." Damian said. "'Sup?"

"And my name is Tate."

"They're my sons." Freddie said.

"You brought your CHILDREN here with you?" Luna asked.

"They were with me when we were teleported." Freddie explained. "Besides, they'd miss me too much if kept back on Earth."

"Pfffttt," Kit said. "We're not wussies, dad!"

"Yeah!" Damian said. "We can handle ourselves just fine."

"Scooters are fancy." Tate said, grinning.

"They're jokesters," Freddie said, ruffling up Kit's hair, which made him pout.

"And this big guy," Punk said, gesturing towards Ryback. "Is Ryback. He doesn't like to talk." Ryback shrugged.

"Well," Celestia said. "It is very nice to meet you all. We wish you good luck on your journey."

"We appreciate it." Freddie said.

"WAIT!" Zane yelled. "Princess Luna. May we ask a favor of you?"

Luna was surprised. "What do you wish?" She asked.

"Could you say....The Fun has Been Doubled? It would please us." Nathan said, blushing.

Luna looked oddly at her sister. "Ummm...Alright then. THE FUN HAS BEEN DOUBLED!"

"YES!!!!" Zane and Nathan yelled, Celestia shrugging at her sister.

"We'd better get going," Twilight said. "We need to change you all into Ponies." To that, everyone except Marcus cheered. Ryback just smiled.

"That is correct." Celestia said. "We shall see you all later." Everyone waved, as they were teleported to Twilight's home.

"What do you think of our guests?" Celestia asked.

"They are...A bit odd." Luna answered honestly. "But, so was BLU. And look what they accomplished."

"They were a great help to us today." Celestia said. "Now we know what we are up against." Luna nodded.

///////////////

Cave.....


///////////////

Pyro-Zi had gone away from Town Hall after his enemies has been Teleported away.

"Hmmm..." Pyro-Zi thought out loud. "I will have to look for shelter. I could create a Home for myself at no time in Ponyville, but I fear it's Citizens would get suspicious at the sudden arrival of it's Existence. I guess this large Cave will do for now..." Pyro-Zi stepped inside the cave. It was big, but he wanted to live someplace less....DARK. His heart was dark of course, but Pyro-Zi enjoyed light for some reason.

"Starting tonight, I will think of my plan to take over Equestria. It seems as though my Dimensionomicon can only be used to teleport to Dimensions, not from them. I will have to adjust that later. My main goal in life, was to take over Earth. But I guess Equestria will do for now. I also, need to find something to test my new Weapon out on.....But what...?" Seconds later, the answer came in the form of a large roar. Pyro-Zi looked behind him, and found the source....It was an Ursa Minor....

Pyro-Zi gasped at the sight of the large Bear-Like creature. "What.....Are you?" Pyro-Zi asked, all he got for an answer, was a large Growl.

"You do not scare me! Nothing scares Emperor Pyro-Zi!" The Emperor smirked, and pulled out his latest invention. It was a normal cannon, able to be carried by arm, but what was unique about it, what the Ammo it contained. When he killed the bird he encountered in the EverFree Forest, Pyro-Zi cut off the bird's large claws with a saw. He then reproduced the claws, making 100's of rounds. The cannon-gun could carry 5 rounds. Pyro-Zi was about to test out his latest invention....

Pyro-Zi pulled the trigger, one claw flew out, hitting the Ursa Minor in his left Pectoral Muscle within a second. The claw started moving across the monster's body at rapid pace, tearing open the flesh, causing the Baby Minor to scream from torturous pain. The claw stopped at the heart, but only dug deeper into the skin, plundering into the heart, ripping and tearing into it, the force causing it to explode. Pyro-Zi smirked. His new invention was a success! The Ursa Minor immediately died, and crashed into the ground, causing a loud thud.

Only a few seconds later, Pyro-Zi heard yet another roar, only this time, it was more louder. Soon, an Ursa Major had appeared in front of Pyro-Zi, this time, the Emperor actually had to gulp. The mommy of the Ursa Minor had been awoken from the mixture of her son's yelps of cry, and it's fall to the ground.

"Father of Plutonium...." Pyro-Zi said. Admiring the spectacle that stood in front of him, he quickly remembered, this was no Petting Zoo exhibit, he had a job to do, and that, was to kill the Ursa Major, and claim this cave as his own.

In theory, Pyro-Zi had no chance to even put up a fight. Before he could fire another claw at the Ursa Major, it quickly slashed it's own giant claws at Pyro-Zi, the first hit, was the last hit. The impact of the blow sent Pyro-Zi flying, out of the cave. The Emperor hit many hard rocks on his tumble down to the ground. On impact with the ground, Pyro-Zi did not move a muscle, and he never would again. The force of the Ursa Major was too much for the evil Genius, Emperor Pyro-Zi, Prince of Onceria.....Was dead.

------TO BE CONTINUED-------

Tensions Rising

A life, dedicated to taking over Earth. Pyro-Zi promised his parents at a young age that he would accomplish what no other Alien had ever even tried to do. Just today, that goal was put on hold for a while. Right now, Pyro-Zi was focused on taking over Equestria. He had the technology, the determination, the confidence, and the brain to take life away from every living Pony. This was all true, but, one fell swoop of a claw, ended Pyro-Zi's hopes of not only taking over Equestria, but Earth, as well. What would his parents think of him right now? It doesn't matter, he's too dead to listen to their heckling.

I know what you are thinking, how could someone talk so much shit, but STILL not get the job done? Pyro-Zi had let his parents down, everyone was supposed to fear him. Why the need to fear a so called "Evil Genius", that can't even defeat an Ursa Major. Sure, defeating one is a tall task for anyone, but Pyro-Zi had the technology to do it in record time, but he wasted time, and in the end, he wasted his life.

Or....Did he? As Pyro-Zi laid on his back, the blood on the ground retracted, seeping back through the Emperor's pores. His heart began beating once again, a quick sign of this, was that in an incredible recovery....Emperor Pyro-Zi opened his eyes. Pyro-Zi had just stared in the face of the Grim Reaper, and spat right smack-dab in it. His first act of his second Life, was to smirk that evil Smirk he had done so many times during his life.

In actuality, Pyro-Zi knew he would come back to life when physically harmed beyond death. He had known this for a while, with the help of one of his more....Doctored inventions. It was called the UIV, which stood for Ultimate IV. How did it work? Well, Pyro-Zi had discovered upon his arrival on Earth, that the Humans used a drug called Orpheus to bring people back to life. Pyro-Zi was impressed that some scientists, not as smart as him, could create such a magnificent drug. He wanted it, so he got it. All he had to do was disguise himself as an F.B.I. agent, go to the top Secret headquarters, and steal as much Orpheus as he could. Then, he reproduced the drug, creating an unlimited supply in no time. He then created a small container that could contain enough Orpheus to keep him alive if he died. He would also need an IV, so the Orpheus would be able to flow through his veins. So, Pyro-Zi made an IV, as well. The IV was large enough to travel across his whole Body, so it did, passing through all the main Artery's and veins, Pyro-Zi now had unlimited life. The container and IV could only be destroyed by ONE substance, ironically enough, it was Magic.

Pyro-Zi's first words spoken in his second Life were nothing you wouldn't expect him to say all day Long. "I'm glad people don't Underestimate me...." Pyro-Zi started. "For if I did not have constant Orpheus flowing through my entire Body, I surely would have let them down. Alas, I'm too smart. In fact," Pyro-Zi boasted. "I proclaim myself, Emperor Pyro-Zi, smartest entity in this, or any other Dimension." He bowed for himself. But now, he had a bone to pick, a pretty fucking big bone, called an Ursa Major.

"You may have killed me, giant creature..." Pyro-Zi said, snarling. "But you have not defeated me yet. And if you have plans to, you may as well abandon such foolish Thoughts! Now....What weapon to use? I need something...Practical." With that, Pyro-Zi pulled out a Bubble Wand.

"Ahhhh," Pyro-Zi said, completely happy about what was about to happen. "This is the PERFECT humiliation device." He laughed manically. Luckily, the Ursa Major stepped out of the cave. This was great, now Pyro-Zi wouldn't need to go back in there. The Ursa Major roared, as Pyro-Zi used another surprise gadget on the titanium Bubble Wand to his advantage. It was a camera. Pyro-Zi took a picture of the Ursa Major, which immediately made a bubble about 3 inches bigger than the Ursa Major develop. The bubble floated towards the Ursa Major at a quick speed. The Ursa Major expected this to be easy, easily thinking she could just pop the bubble with her claws. Well, that wouldn't be happening anytime soon, the bubble still captured the giant Creature. Just like the IV and Orpheus Container, and many of Pyro-Zi's other invention, it could only be popped by Magic. The Ursa Major growled ferociously, as Pyro-Zi easily went over to the bubble, and picked it up with one finger. The bubble did have an over 1000 pound animal Species inside of it, but Pyro-Zi specially produced these bubbles to be Air-Light, meaning whatever was inside of it, Pyro-Zi could carry it EASILY.

"Computer!" Pyro-Zi yelled. Once again, the Computer unwinded.

"Yes, Emperor?" It beeped.

"What is this creature I hold?" He asked simply.

"Calculating origin...." The computer downloaded data once again. "The creature you carry currently, is called an Ursa Major. They are much bigger than Ursa Minors, which are their children. They are powerful beyond belief, and with one swipe of a claw, can kill a medium sized dragon."

"Interesting," Pyro-Zi smirked. "So, I am about to kill a creature that can kill a DRAGON? That's....PATHETIC!" Pyro-Zi shouted the last Word, mocking the Ursa Major.

"Not only that..." Pyro-Zi said. "But that smaller creature I killed, must have been your SON." Pyro-Zi laughed. "That's just TOO MUCH!" The Ursa Major just roared some more, desperately trying to get out of the Bubble.

"I don't think so...." Pyro-Zi growled. "You are going to rue the day you swiped that claw of yours at Me...Now, you can join your son, in wherever it is you creatures go when you Die!" Pyro-Zi used his Rocket Shoes to fly far up into the Air. When he thought he was far up enough for a sure fire death, he stopped, and looked down.

Then, Pyro-Zi, without another word, dropped the bubble containing the Ursa Major. It traveled at impossible speeds down. It was even faster than Rainbow Dash! In no time, the bubble was hitting the ground with a force that would of killed ANYTHING in existence. The bubble exploded, and so to, did the Ursa Major's body. Blood, intestines, guts, and many other Organs flew all across the land. Pyro-Zi smirked. His second life was starting off quite well so far.

"Good lord," Pyro-Zi said, sarcastically putting his hands to his mouth, gasping. "I'm so sorry, you hideous thing....I didn't mean to burst your bubble." At his pun, Pyro-Zi laughed uproariously, only for a few seconds, as he soon realized how lame he just sounded. "Ugh..." Pyro-Zi said. "That....Was BAD."

"Yes, Emperor. It was." The computer stated, laughing.

"SILENCE!" Pyro-Zi screamed, causing a pixelated sweat drop to appear on the Computer's monitor. "You may go back to sleep Mode, computer." He crossed his arms. On his command, the Computer quickly went back to sleep mode, disappearing into the Emperor's briefcase.

"If I can kill an Ursa Major....." Pyro-Zi said. "Then how in the HELL do these weak Ponies believe they can beat ME!? I am quite interested in those Elements of Harmony, though.....I will have to learn more about them." With that, he took his supplies, and went into his brand new Cave.

The library.....

"So," Austin asked. "Do you think we made a good first impression?"

"The princesses seemed to like you just Fine." Twilight answered.

"YAY!!!!!!!" Zane and Nathan screamed, causing everyone to cover their Ears. "LUNA LIKES US! LUNA LIKES US! LUNA LIKES US! LUNA LIKES US!" To stop this ear-Drum abuse, all Ryback had to do was was glare at the Bronies. Peace was restored once Again.

"Sorry...." Zane and Nathan apologized. Pinkie Pie giggled.

"So," Twilight said. "Are you all ready to become PONIES?" With that, everyone cheered, Ryback smiled, and Marcus just growled.

"Woo.....Freaking....Hoo....." Marcus said, sarcastically waving his index finger.

"Look, Marky." Rainbow Said, glaring at Marcus. "I'm not sure what your problem is, but your really getting on not mine, but everyone else's nerves as well. What is so bad about Ponies?!" She asked.

"First off, my name is NOT Marky. Okay?" Marcus said, snarling. "Secondly, I'm not discussing it with ANY of you!" He yelled.

"Just tell us, ya stubborn fool." Applejack said.

"Yeah! You can trust us, Marky!" Pinkie said, giggling.

"No, I can't trust you." Marcus explained. "Because I DON'T trust you!"

"Why not?" Twilight asked. "How horrific could it be?"

"Pretty fucking horrific...." Marcus said. "You ponies wouldn't understand. NONE OF YOU would understand what I went through! Nothing like it has ever happened to ANY of you!" Marcus was fuming. Why did these stupid ponies want to know his secret? Why did they care?

"Besides," Marcus said, looking away. "Why do you all even care?"

"Because...." Pinkie said. "You're our friend Mark-Marcus." She almost slipped up and called him his nickname, which wouldn't have been good.

"Oh?" Marcus said. "I'm your friend, huh?" All the ponies nodded. "Well, I sure wasn't your friend ever before!"

"What are you talking about, darling?" Rarity asked the same thing everypony else was thinking.

"Just turn me into a Pony...." Marcus said, closing his eyes. Tears starting to well Up. Freddie just shrugged, not knowing was Marcus was talking about either. Marcus had never told anybody about what happened.

Pinkie was about to ask Marcus to tell his story again, but Applejack whispered to her to just let Him be, so Pinkie backed off.

"Okay..." Twilight said, nervous and actually a bit Scared of Marcus in his current state. "Everyone ready?" They all gave a thumbs up, except for Marcus, who just wiped his eyes out.

With that, Twilight's horn lit up, magic beginning to come into Play. All of the Humans eyes starting glowing white, a bit of pain piercing through their body.

Seconds later, a white burst of any filled up the library, nobody could see anything until it finally phased out. Twilight was exhausted, that spell took a lot out of Her. She just fell to the floor, rubbing her forehead.

Standing before the Mane 6 and Spike, were the 12 newest Ponies in Ponyville. They all looked at their hooves, most starting to smile, but none bigger than Zane and Nathan.

"AWW YEAH!" Nathan said. "This is AWESOME!"

"Now we can do this...." Zane said. "BRO-HOOF!" With that, Zane and Nathan's hooves met for the first time, they were giddy with excitement.

"OH SHIT!" Nova screamed, immediately slipping on the ground, not used to his new Body. Everybody laughed at Nova's clumsiness. "WHAT THE-WAAAALLKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Nova kept trying to walk, but just kept falling down.

"Need some help?" Rainbow Dash giggled.

"No, no...." Nova said, trying to act like he had everything under control. "I'm just, ya know, goofing around....This time, I'm walking!" Nova tried to walk once more, but, ONCE AGAIN, just fell of his ass.

"HAHA! Ze laughs at You! HAHA!" Ze teased Nova.

"I may be in a new Body," Nova began. "But...I can still do THIS!" With that, Nova pushed Ze.

"WHOA!" Ze screamed. "STAY UP, STAY UP, STAY UP, STAY UP, STAY UP, DAMMIT!!!!!!" After many seconds of trying to stay Balanced, Ze too, fell on his ass. Everyone laughed. Ze and Nova started kicking eachother with their hooves.

"FUCK OFF!" Nova yelled. He launched another kick. This time, he caught Ze right in the nuts.

Ze automatically groaned. "Ze's.......Pubic Sack.......HEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPP." He barely managed to screech out the next Word.

Applejack and Rainbow Dash couldn't stop laughing. "Ya'll are a RIOT!" Applejack said.

"We TRRIYIYIYIYIYI-AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Nova tried to say, falling on his ass Once again.

"MLG! MLG!" Ze screamed. He was doing a Hoove-Stand. But Nova kicked him, stopping his momentum.

"OUCH!" Ze yelled, rubbing his forehead. "DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ZE'S AWESOMENESS?

"Yeh I do!" Nova said. "You wanna go?"

"Considering you and Ze can't walk...." Ze began, falling again. "Maybe we will have to wait a while."

"Agree-EEEEEEDDDDDD!" Nova screeched, falling.

"Cool!" Freddie exclaimed. "I still got my fauxhawk!" He started touching his hair with his hooves.

"You're the only Pony in Ponyville with hair like THAT." Twilight said.

Freddie's children were having a grand Old time. They were jumping around the library with Pinkie. While Ryback was trying to hug CM Punk.

"Get away from me, dammit!" Punk said, trotting away from the Big man. Ryback just trotted faster, though, until he finally got him in a Big bear Hug.

"Dammit..." Punk pouted. "Alright, alright, man. Put me down." Finally, Ryback put Punk down, and ran off to hug more Ponies.

Rarity couldn't help but stare at CM Punk. He had to be the second most Handsome colt she had ever Seen. First was Engineer, of course, but Punk fit his Pony body quite Well.

"Phillip!" Rarity called.

"Yeah?" Punk said.

"May I talk to you...In private?" Rarity asked.

Punk smirked. He couldn't believe this chick wanted him this fast. Must've been the beard. He touched his chin with his hoof. Yup. The beard was still there. "Sure...." He answered. And with that, the Colt and Filly went outside.

"So....." Punk began. "What you need?"

While Punk expected Rarity to pounce on him like cat-nip, instead, he saw the most pissed off Look he had ever seen. Whether on woman, or Pony. If looks could kill....

"Do you think I am stupid, darling?" Rarity asked.

".....What?" Was all the shocked Chicago native could say.

"That apology you gave me earlier.....You didn't mean it." Rarity scowled.

"What are you talking about?!" Punk said. "Yes I did!"

"You shouldn't lie to a lady, Phillip....." Rarity said, looking away. "Not only that, but you've been completely arrogant and self-centered since you first Got here."

"Oh.....I'VE been self centered?" Punk exclaimed. "I sat on the ground. Unlike you, sister. I've seen many women like you back on Earth. Prissy, bossy, thinking their shit don't stink. Well, let me tell you something.....There is NO WAY I'm going to stand for bitches HERE of all Places."

"How DARE you insult me with such words!" Rarity said, starting to get pissed. "You do not know me, Phillip. You do not know me at all."

"Oh," Punk said. "But I DO....I know all about your kind. And yeah, My apology WAS a lie. I only said it so tensions wouldn't Rise. But I'm glad you figured it out. I was going to tell you this soon Enough, anyway....You need to wake up and smell the Hay. Ponies don't wear FAKE EYELASHES." He said, gesturing.

"They do when they want to look their best!" Rarity yelled.

"That's the problem....." Punk said. "We can stand here and argue all Night, but what will it accomplish? How about you and Me, just stay out of eachother's ways, and play off the fact that I'm a Hobo, and you're a Snob? Alright?

"I concur." Rarity said. "I am not, in any way, a SNOB. You are more of a Hobo than I am a snob."

"I've been called worse. Anything your bitchy Attitude throws at me, I can just reflect it right back to You."

Rarity paused for a minute, running out of words. "....HOBO!"

"SNOB!"

"HOBO!"

"SNOB!"

"HOBO!"

"SNOB!"

"HOBO!"

"SNOB!"

"HOBO!"

"SNOB!"

Rarity was sick of saying the same Word over and Over, so she just settled for kicking Punk in the groin, and walked off.

Punk lied on the ground, groaning. "That hurts even more than High Heels!" He yelled. "I'm not done with her yet...." He got up slowly, and went back inside.

-------TO BE CONTINUED---------

911 is A Joke

"So, What do ya'll thank?" Applejack asked with a smile. "Does being a Poneh feel as great as it looks?"

"Who the hell said being a Pony looked FUN?!" Sims said, scowling. "Whoever said that needs to have their throat ripped Out." In pony form, Sims fur was brown, just like his skin color. He still had his black buzz-cut, and his Cutie Mark, for some odd Reason, was a Knitted Blanket.

"Aww, Marky, you're just mad because your Cutie Mark is a blanket!" Austin said, causing Sims to growl. "I think it feels awesome!" As a pony, Austin pretty much looked like he did as a human. He had his eyepatch still, of course, he had his black Curly hair, his fur was Red, as red as Big Mac's, and his Cutie Mark was an Airplane. He did have a pilot's license, after all, he just didn't know that was his TRUE talents. A hobby, yes, a talent, no. But he liked it anyway.

"Not only that," Punk said. "But it's a KNITTED Blanket!" Punk couldn't help but laugh his ass off, almost everyone had no chance after they saw Marcus' flank. Rarity didn't want to show it, but she smiled at Punk's bravery, especially when Sims would not hesitate to kill him if given the chance.

"Stop fucking laughing!" Sims yelled, not amused. "Knitting calms me..."

"Like you need calming, you female!" Punk said, laughing some more. As a pony, Punk still had his beard, his light black, slicked back hair, his fur was colored blue, but he only had ONE of his tattoos, and that was his Cutie Mark, which was his Straightedge tattoo. That was Punk's favorite one, so he was glad he got to keep it.

"Actually," Sims began. "I DO need calming.....So I don't kill one of you in your Sleep one day....."

"Calm your pussy, Si-IEIEIEIEIIIMMMMMSSSSSS!!!!!!!" Nova tried to say, but fell for about the 500th time since becoming a Pony. As a pony, Nova still had his beard, and his slicked back black hair, which had always looked eerily similar from Punk's hair. His fur was charcoal gray, and his Cutie Mark, was what the fuck else? An XBox controller....

"Ze is going to stand still for the rest of his days....." Ze said, fearing the worst. As a pony, Ze still had his 5'Oclock shadow, his fur was a tan Color, his hair was the light brown it had always been, and his Cutie Mark, was The Sword from The Legend of Zelda.

"Come-on, you fucks..." Freddie said, getting sick of this failing. "It's not that hard....." Freddie then started doing some spins and flips in the Air, awing Ze and Nova. As a pony, Freddie still had his purple fauxhawk, of course, he had his lightly transcendent beard, his fur was Seafoam Green (Don't judge), and his Cutie Mark, was....A bottle of Hair Gel? Since when is that a tale-Fuck it....

"Ze can do that in his Sleep!" With that, Ze jumping in the air, tried to do a 360, but only managed to kick Ryback square in the jaw.

"Oh shit...." Nova exclaimed. "Welp, you're fucked." He then patted Ze on the shoulder and went to the corner. "Nice knowing ya, Ze!"

Ze gulped, as Ryback snarled right in his face.

"Ze......Is sorry?" Ze said. Ryback only smiled, and shoved Ze, Ze tried to stay balanced, but ultimately fell back into one of Twilight's many bookcases.

"Thew..." Ze said, thanking his stars. "Ze is proud to say....NO BOOKS HAVE FALLEN ON ZE'S HEAD TODAY-" Before Ze could finish his sentence, about 50 books fell on top of his Head. Everyone gasped, Twilight just scowled. It seemed that at least ONE time EVERY day, she had a book shelf to rejuvenate.

"Daaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaa...........Cotton.....Shoe.......Cloud of Perpetual sorrows.........ANESTHESIA." With that cluster-fuck of Words, Ze passed out.

"Hey, you alright buddy?" Nova asked, nudging Ze with his hoof. "ANSWER YOU FHEGHYEGDHJWDW!!!!!" Nova kicked Ze in the nuts, but that didn't work, either. "I've got another idea...." Nova smirked evilly, he then dragged Ze outside, everyone trying to figure out what he would possibly do to poor Ze.

"That wasn't very nice, Ryback!" Pinkie said. Ryback just shrugged, going off to hug more hoes. As a pony, Ryback had his moppy black hair, that covered his eyes, and his Cutie Mark, was a skull, with blood oozing from it's eye sockets....Well, that's telling. And, his coat, was plain black. That's it. It made him look like a Shadow, though, so he would easily be able to scare Fluttershy.

"Zane, look!" Nathan said. "My Cutie Mark....." It was of course, the Troll face. Other then that, Nathan had his super Curly dark brown hair, and his coat was canary Yellow.

"SWEET!" Zane said, excited. "Look at mine!" Zane's Cutie Mark was a Derp Face. Also, he had his sort of moppy light brown Hair, and his coat was green like a Creeper. The two friends Bro-Hoofed once again.

Finally, were Damian, Kit, and Tate. Damian had his black buzz-cut hair, his coat was Orange, and his Cutie Mark was....A Twix bar? DA FUQ? Oh well.....Kit had his brown buzz-cut hair, his Coat was Navy Blue, and his Cutie Mark was a Kit Kat bar. Yeh, there's a story to this.....Finally, was Tate. He has his blonde buzz-cut hair, his coat was Maroon colored, and his Cutie Mark was.....A LAMBORGHINI?! I don't even know....AND I TYPED THIS SHIT!!!!

"Sons," Freddie said. "Your Cutie Marks....SUCK."

"Get over it, Gelly." Damian said, Freddie was shocked. He thought his Cutie Mark was rad! "I didn't think that Twix was a talent, though?"

"Maybe you can work at a Twix factory!" Kit suggested, Damian just blankly stared at him. "Yeah! You make Twix, and I'll make Kit Kats!

"And I'll make....Cars?" Tate said, blinking.

"It fits." Freddie said, smiling. "You're always saying you like a multitude of vehicles."

"What's a vehicle?" Kit asked, confused. Damian and Tate facepalmed. I'm not surprised......His hair is blonde.... Freddie thought.

As for the breed of Ponies everyone was, Nova and Ze were Pegasi, so they'd be able to live on the Clouds. Surprisingly, everyone else were Earth Ponies. Twilight must've made it that way, so the muddafugga's wouldn't try to outshine her with their MAGICS.

Outside, Nova thought of the PERFECT idea to wake Ze up from his nap.....He pissed on him. Across from Twilight's Library, though. Somepony was watching him, Officer J. Jonah Jameson, or Triple J, head Deputy at the Ponyville Police Department. He was smoking a cigar in his white collared shirt and Blue tie. He also had a Hitler 'Stache. Alongside him, was the photographer for the Ponyville Port, Lens Flare.

"Snap some shots right there, Lens....The citizens of Ponyville need to see these scum in Action! I need pictures....PICTURES OF HUMANS." He scowled.

"Yes, sir!" Lens said, taking many pictures of the Unfolding scene. Soon, Ze woke up, and his first reaction, kick Nova in the Balls, what else? Nova groaned in Pain and slumped onto the ground.

"WHAT THE?!" Ze yelled, shaking the pee off of himself. "Why-Why would you......"

"I was just helping You, you fuck!" Nova explained, coughing. "You were knocked out, so I drained mah Lizard! Is that so bad?!"

"It's pretty damn bad, Boys...." Jameson said, now right in front of Ze and Nova

"Who the FUCK are you?!" Nova asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"I'm you juvenile delinquents WORST. NIGHTMARE. EVER." Jameson said, growling at the two boys. "My name, is Officer J. Jonah Jameson! I could arrest you punks for public Urination!"

"J Jonah Jameson? He's the guy from Spiderman!" Nova whispered to Ze.

"Holy shit, I know!" Ze replied.

"Stop whispering!" Jameson yelled, at this Point, everyone else was outside, wondering what the hell was Going on.

"What seems to be the problem, Officer?" Twilight asked.

"I just caught these-these-Punks, inducing in Public urination! Foals live in this town, ya know! You think just because your from Earth, that you can do whatever the hell you want?!"

"Well.....Kinda..." Nova said, shrugging. Ze chuckled.

"Nova, Ze, darlings...." Rarity began. "What were you doing out here?!"

"Ze wouldn't slip out of unconsciousness," Nova explained. "So...I pissed on him!"

"That's....Weird." Fluttershy said quietly.

"Yeah! But it worked! Look at him! He can even walk in his Pony body, now!" Nova exclaimed, as Ze trotted around in circles.

"Officer," Applejack began. "Ah know what these boys did is wrong, but they don't seem like the brightest bunch. I'm sure this is normal, everyday steff for em'!"

"Yeh." Nova said plainly. "It is. On Earth, we don't hesitate to cause a scene." Ze nodded and smirked.

"That's right, boys! Represent!" Punk screamed.

"Just so you all know....." Marcus said. "I don't do ANY shit like this...."

"That's not what your mother said...." Freddie exclaimed. "Oops! Did I say that?" Sims growled.

"I don't trust you Humans....." Jameson said. "And no matter the cost, I'm going to get you ALL, thrown in Jail! And ladies, if you want to stick up for them...You'll all be cell Buddies!"

"You can't talk to the Elements of Harmony like that!" Zane yelled.

"Yeah! They will kill you with Kindness!" Nathan said.

"I don't know what show You guys are watching..." Rainbow Dash said. "But I ain't killing anyone with kindness!"

"I've got my eye on you...." Jameson said. "Comeon, Lens....Let's go...."

"Right away, sir!" Luke said, as the dicks walked Away.

"What's this?" Austin said, picking up the Photos that had dropped out of Lens Flare's Photo pouch. "OH, WHAT THE HELL?!"

"WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS IT?" Pinkie Pie said excitedly. "Let me see-Oh........Ummmm.......Wow.....Ummmm..." Pinkie was speechless.

"Ugh," Rarity said, trying not to throw up. "How can you be so UNCIVILIZED?"

"Simple." Nova explained. ".....I'm not." Ze started laughing.

"You guys are so FUNNY!" Rainbow Dash laughed out loud.

"Atleast SOMEONE appreciates mah talents." Nova smirked.

"Sugacube, I know what talents er, and THAT, well, that ain't no talent..." Applejack said, cringing.

"Depends on how you look at it." Nova said, crossing his arms.

"In picture form?" Austin asked.

"Well....Yeah, you're right, it's not a Talent." Nova answered. "Gotta admit, though...It's pretty cool!"

"I don't get ya'll...." Applejack said, looking away, shaking her head. "I just don't get ya'll....."

"Ze is used to it." Ze said.

"Why don't we just get to our own Homes? It's been a LONG day...." Twilight said, everyone nodded.

"Great idea!" Rainbow said. "Lets go, cool fools!" She gestured towards Ze and Nova. Ze and Nova tried to fly, but just kept crashing into eachother.

"Ugh..." Rainbow said, facehoofing. "Looks like I'm gonna have to carry you guys...."

"FUCK YO STEROIDS, GIRL!" Nova said.

"Yes, Ze has got this in the ba-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" This time, Ze had ran over Horsepower.

"Uh oh....Ze is sorry, sir!" Ze apologized.

"Yeah?" Horsepower said.

"Yeah." Ze replied.

"YEAH?"

"YEAH."

"YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH?"

"YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH."

"YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Horsepower smiled.

"YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Ze and Horsepower highhoofed, and Horsepower was off, screaming YEAH as he trotted.

Pinkie giggled. "Comeon, Marky! Lets get to Sugarcube Corner. Maybe...You can make me a SWEATER!" Pinkie suggested with Glee.

"If you shut up....YES." Marcus said, his head throbbing.

"HAI RARITY." Nathan and Zane said, derpy looks on their faces.

"Hello, boys." Rarity smiled. "Lets go on home...Shall we?" Zane and Nathan nodded, and they were off.

"Ready to go, Ryback?" Fluttershy quietly asked. Ryback just nodded, making Fluttershy smile. Fluttershy tried to fly off, but Ryback stopped her.

"What's wrong?" Fluttershy asked.

All Ryback did for an answer, was point to his back.

"You want me to ride you?" Ryback nodded. PERVERTED ASS BUTTER-SCOTCH MARE.

"Alright." Fluttershy agreed, hopping on Ryback's back, going on their way to the Cottage.

"Ya'll ready to get back to the Farm for some work?" Applejack asked.

"Nope." Damian said.

"Not really." Kit said.

"Apples." Tate said.

"Wha, yes, we do have apples, Tate." Applejack replied, smiling. Tate smiled with glee.

"You've got some great Kids, Freddie...." Punk said. Freddie's eyes went wide. Apparently, Punk was lying about being Straightedge, because he'd have to be high to think his Kids were "Great."

"Uhhh...Thanks, man." Freddie said. "You should get some kids too, dude. You're already 33."

"I'm just looking for the right girl....." Punk said.

Freddie smirked. "She'll come along, dude. They always do." Punk smiled, that made him feel better.

"Ready to go inside?" Twilight asked Austin.

"Yeah." Austin replied.

"Austin....?" Twilight said, cocking her heard to the side.

"What is it?" Austin asked.

"You seem....Tense...." Twilight smiled, raising an eyebrow.

"I am pretty stressed out. So much has happened today....."

"I have something to relieve that stress." Twilight said, smiling. "Come inside...."

Austin shrugged, and decided to go inside. But he had a BAAAAAADDD feeling something was about to happen.

HE GETTIN' FUCKED.

-------TO BE CONTINUED----------

Getting Settled In

///////////////

Pyro-Zi's Cave.....

///////////////

Pyro-Zi was busy plotting his takeover of Equestria. While deep in his thoughts, he heard two voices from inside his cave.

"Who DARES disrupt my psyche?!" Pyro-Zi silently yelled, he then turned invisible. "I have intruders....Do they not know what I am capable of?" He rolled his eyes, getting up to see what was going on.

"I can't believe The Elements of Harmony are friends with those Human scum!" Officer Jameson yelled. "If I have anything to say about it, they'll ALL be in Jail!"

"But, sir...." Lens Flare began. "The Elements of Harmony are great Associates with the Princess. Wont she be mad that we are targeting her prized heroes?"

"I don't give a damn what the Princess does!" Jameson yelled, throwing his Cigar on the ground and stepping on it. "I can have her overthrown as well! I am the best damn Cop this side of Equestria! Nothing can stop me."

Pyro-Zi chuckled. "We'll see about that....." He was listening and watching from behind a big rock. "It seems as though these two share disdain for the Elements of Harmony....Well, we have one thing in common, at least."

"I just need you to do ONE thing for me, Lens.....Make sure those pictures of the Humans do me justice!" Jameson said, staring down Lens.

"Sir....You usually hate me. You don't trust anyone, that's your problem." Lens said, fearing he may get punched.

"I trust my barber." Jameson said, snorting.

"Besides," Lens began. "How do you know people can trust you? You haven't exactly been the most FAIR cop."

"How can they not trust me?" Jameson snapped. "Have you SEEN the pictures? One human is pissing on another one! Ponies have eyes, don't they?"

"Well," Lens replied. "In my opinion, that Human wasn't doing anything derogatory, he was helping his friend. And printing a picture about it in the newspaper is slander."

"It is not." Jameson retorted. "I resent that. Slander is spoken. In print, it's libel. You just print those pictures, and stop worrying so damn much....."

"We've got a page one Problem, officer...." Lens gasped.

"We've got a page one problem, shut up." Jameson said, mocking Lens Flare, while lighting another cigar.

"No, sir....The pictures are gone!" Lens yelled.

Jameson gained an angry expression. "WHAT?! WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"I......" Lens stuttered. "I.....Must have lost them....."

Jameson facehoofed. "Steed dammit, Flare...."

"Please, sir. Don't tell my boss about this incident!" Lens tried to reason with the corrupt Officer. "I NEED this job!"

"No jobs! Freelance!" Jameson began. "Best thing in the world for a colt your age. You bring me some more pictures of those newspaper-selling clowns, maybe I'll take 'em off your hands. But I never said you'll be out of a job. I'll give you another chance, and if you fail, I will make you infamous, kid. And, if you succeed...I'll send you a nice box of Hearths Warming hay. It's the best I can do, get out of here."

"Yes sir, sorry sir." Lens quickly apologized, before running off. He didn't get far, though, as a now de-cloaked Pyro-Zi bumped into him.

"Oh, completely sorry, sir. I-" Lens then saw who he had bumped into to, he gasped, and slowly started to back away.

"You really should watch where you are going, colt..." Pyro-Zi said. "You may run into someone BAD one day." He smirked.

Lens gasped. And started screaming. "OFFICER! OFFICER! HELP MEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"

"I told you get out of here, Flar-" Jameson gasped, seeing what had scared the photographer. "Pyro-Zi...." He gulped.

"THE one and only." Pyro-Zi said, bowing.

Just then, Jameson pulled out his gun. "You stand the hell back......I will blow your brains out if you move ONE step."

"Alright, I'll do it your way..." Pyro-Zi said, putting his hands up in surrender. "I wouldn't want to interfere on your little scheme. But you know, your little scheme, it irks me.....I want to destroy the Elements of Harmony. And when people like you show up, it ruins my Plans."

"You don't stand a chance, anyway...." Jameson stated. "The Elements of Harmony have defeated some damn powerful enemies. But they can't defeat POLICE!"

"No, but I can....." Pyro-Zi smiled. "Engage.....Gravity Sprain!" Now, Pyro-Zi had both the Cop and the Photographer in the air with a force Choke.

"Gaaaaaahhhh-" Jameson choked. "Wh....Whaa...WHAT THE?!"

"I have you now!" Pyro-Zi stated.

"He's-GOT UUUSSS!" Lens screamed.

"Don't act so so surprised." Pyro-Zi said. "You weren't on any mercy mission this time. Speaking of mercy, I WILL SHOW NONE!" Pyro-Zi tightened his grip some more, causing more coughing from those in his grasp.

"Wha.....WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" Jameson asked, trying desperately to escape.

"I just want to ask you both ONE simple question...." Pyro-Zi smirked. "Are you ready....For your closeup?"

There was no answer, just mostly coughing, and the presence of fear.

"Wrong answer...." Pyro-Zi then tightened his grip to maximum pressure, causing the heads of Jameson and Lens to explode. Their brain matter flew everywhere, most of it seeped down to Pyro-Zi's hand, though.

Pyro-Zi looked at the damage he had caused. So far, in one day of Equestria, he had killed an Ursa Minor, an Ursa Major, and two weak civilians. Not a bad rap sheet so far.

Pyro-Zi then sighed. "Are you ready for your closeup? How pathetic of me! I really should work on my Material....." With that, Pyro-Zi left the corpses of Jameson and Lens to rot, and went back to plotting.

///////////////


Sugarcube Corner.......

///////////////

Pinkie Pie was humming some annoying song as she and Sims entered the sweets shop. "Oh the HORROR.....Make it stop!!!!" Marcus thought.

"Okay!" Pinkie said, excitedly. "We're HEEEEERRREEEE!"

"Oh joy...." Sims grumbled.

"Comeon, Marky!" Pinkie said, nudging Marcus with her elbow. "You need to just CHEER UP! Turn that sad frown upside DOWN!"

"I think not." Marcus replied.

"Would you like me to sing you a Song?" Pinkie asked, the twinkles in her eyes sparkling.

"Not really...." Marcus said.

"Oh, come on, MAAARRRKKKY! I made it up while on our way here! PLLLEEEAAASSSEEEE?" Pinkie begged.

Sims sighed. "No, Pinkie...." This was going to be HELL.

"PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE PPPPPPLLLEEEAAASSEEE?" Pinkie started jumping around Marcus. "PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEAAAASSEEEE PLEEEEAAASSSEEE?"

"OH MY JESUS....FINE!" Marcus finally said, yelling. "SING IT LOUD, SING IT PROUD!"

Pinkie couldn't tell Marcus was mad, she just thought he must of been SUPER DUPER Excited!

"Okey dokey lokey! Here it goes...." Pinkie took a deep breath, about ready to make Marcus as happy as ever.

"Today I met a friend, a really great friend, Today I met a friend, a friend until the End. Today I net a friend, a really great friend, Today I met a friend, a Friend until the EEEEEEEEEENNNNDDDDDD.

Hello, Marky. How do ya do? My name is Pinkie Pie, but you already knew.

You're feeling kinda sappy, you're feeling kinda down. But that's okay, cuz Pinkie Pie will turn your mouth upside down!

Nopony can resist, my super cheery songs. I know we'll be the best of Friends, and laugh all day long.

And laugh all day long, and sing all day long, and play all day long, and talk all day long.

You're my best friend Marky, and you should really know. And if you ever need a reminder, be sure to tell me so!" The song ended as some confetti and fireworked exploded out of nowhere.

Marcus just sat there. Un-amused, untamed, and unchanged.

"Well, did you like it, did you like it? Huhhuhhuh?" Pinkie asked, appearing at both sides of Marcus' face multiple times.

"It was........" Marcus didn't want to say this word, because he HATED the song, he wanted to just yell at the Pink Pony, but he knew he'd get his ass kicked if he even tried. ".............NICE." Marcus barely got the word out.

At this, Pinkie's eyes grew so wide. She hugged Marcus very tightly, nearly straining the wind out of his sail's "THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!!!!" Pinkie thanked him over and over. "You're such a great Friend, Marky!"

Marcus nervously scratched the back of his neck. "Uh....Yeah, thanks...." He quickly decided to change the subject. "So, you live in a Bake shop?"

"Oh yes!" Pinkie exclaimed, grinning. "The former owners, the Cakes moved away. And they gave me the house, and their business....FOR FREE! So, I guess this makes me a business-woman now." Pinkie giggled. "You can help me make food for the customers, okay?" Marcus nodded, at least it would smell nice in here.

"Great!" Pinkie said. "Let me show you your room...." Marcus followed Pinkie into the guest room. It was.....Girly, to say the least.....

"It's really fucking.....PINK." Marcus cringed.

"Don't you like Pink?" Pinkie asked, noticing Sims' disappointment.

"HELL no." Marcus said flatly, cringing as he looked around the room.

"Well, why not?" Pinkie asked. "You sure do like SEWING." This struck a Nerve in Marcus, he was about to yell, but barely was able to keep his composure.

"Just because I like sewing.....Doesn't mean I like girly things....." Sims retorted. "And besides, sewing is NOT girly!"

Pinkie frowned a bit. She didn't want to make her new friend sad. "I'm sorry, Marky." She nuzzled him, this made Marcus feel even WORSE. "She'd better get the hell away from me.....SOON. I don't need a Pink shag-rug to muddle my feelings." Marcus though.

"It's fine...." Marcus said. This make Pinkie happy again.

"My room is right next to Yours! Which is good, now we wont have to walk so far to see eachother!" Pinkie said, absolute glee exfoliating from her soul.

"GREEEAAATTT..." Marcus said, chuckling sarcastically.

"And sometimes at night, I tend to have a few Nightmares..." Pinkie explained. "And if that happens, it'd be nice for someone to comfort me. You don't have to, though. But I mean.....I'd do the same for you...." Pinkie gave Sims the guilt trip. Like he gave a shit.

"If you wake me up, I guess I have no choice...." Pinkie smiled whole-heartedly. Sims was lying, of course. Pinkie hugged Sims again, anyway. "I just know we're gonna be GREAT friends...." Pinkie told Sims.

Sims chuckled sarcastically. "I'm sure we are....." He then gave that signature Pony-Hating stare down at Pinkie. She didn't notice, though, because she was too busy hugging her new buddy.

Carousel Boutique....

Rarity and her two fanboys walked into Carousel Boutique. The first thing Nathan and Zane noticed, was Rarity's cat, Opalescence was sleeping on the floor. Nathan and Zane immediately went over to wake her Up.

"I don't know if that's a very good idea, darlings...." Rarity stated. "Opal isn't a very charming kitty....."

"Why keep her then?" Nathan asked.

"She was my mother's cat." Rarity explained. "And when they moved away from Ponyville, they knew Opal would be scared out of her mind about the new surroundings. So, they decided to give her to me. I must say, though, I wasn't exactly pleased to hear of such news...."

"Yeah," Zane said. "Cats suck, anyway...."

"She's not THAT bad." Rarity replied. "She just.....Has a bit of a trust Issue...."

Nathan boldly picked up the Cat in his arms. It didn't wake up, it just slept soundly.

"You're a natural, bro!" Zane exclaimed.

"My mom's a crazy cat lady....So I'm used to this." Nathan chuckled.

"Oh my stars....." Rarity gasped. "Dear Opal NEVER lets me hold her!"

"How about you try while she's asleep?" Nathan suggested.

Rarity trotted over to Nathan, ready to try out this new theory. Nathan gently put the cat in Rarity's arms. Immediately after, though, Opal awoke. She screeched, and jumped on top of Rarity's head.

Rarity scowled. ".....How rude...." She said, and then sighed. "It was a nice try, boys.....But Opal just doesn't care for me too much."

Opal jumped off of Rarity's head, and walked back to Nathan. It plopped down, and started to sleep on Nathan's hooves once again.

"Oh no...." Zane said. "You're turning into your mom, bro!"

Nathan laughed. "I don't think so, man....Like you said, dogs are better, anyway."

Rarity watched, a bit jealous of how her own Pet liked Nathan more than her. "Well, let me show you boys to the Guest Roo-" Rarity tried to finish, but was interrupted by the boys.

"No need, fair Rarity!" Zane proclaimed. "We already know where the guest Room is." The workings of a stalker. I will never understand them.........YUP. Never will....NEVER. HA!

.......SHUT UP AND READ.

"Yes," Nathan nodded. "You work, we'll get settled in."

"Well...." Rarity contemplated, not sure if she should trust the Boys yet. "Alright, then. But PLEASE boys, don't touch anything." She didn't want a repeat of her sister's handiwork.

"Pffttt," Nathan laughed. "We are WAY more mature than Sweetie Belle!" With that, the boys were off, Opal followed them, of course.

Rarity gained a worry look. "Somehow.....I doubt that very much..." She quietly said to herself. She then went back to putting her house back into place.

Fluttershy's Cottage.....

Ryback and Fluttershy were at the Cottage in a jiffy. For a big Stallion, Ryback sure was faster than Fluttershy thought he'd be.

"Here we are..." Fluttershy said, smiling. Ryback opened the door for Fluttershy.

"Oh, I see. Fillies first." She smiled, going inside first as Ryback shut the door behind them.

Ryback looked around. This place looked more peaceful then Outside.

"I hope you don't mind all the Animals, I-Happen to like them..." Fluttershy grinned awkwardly. Ryback nodded no, he liked animals, too. More than he would admit.

"Angel, sweetie." Fluttershy called to her Bunny, who appeared in no time. "This is Ryback....He will be staying here with us for a while...."

Angel cowered in fear of the Big stallion. That was until, Ryback bent down, and gently tickled Angel's cheek. The bunny eased back now, even going so far as to let Ryback HOLD him.

Fluttershy gasped. "I didn't think you could be so good with Animals...." Ryback just smiled with Fluttershy. He nuzzled Angel with his cheek, the Bunny loving every minute of the Affection.

"I think he likes you...." Fluttershy said, amazed at what was happening. Ryback nodded.

"I have many more Animals outside. Would you like to see them?" Fluttershy asked. For an answer, Ryback smiled and nodded. Then, the two went outside to play some more with the Animals.

Cloudsdale....

Rainbow Dash had FINALLY arrived. She was sweating prefously, not to mention panting more than she would have in a race against the Wonderbolts. She had to carry her two guests on her BACK, since they couldn't fly yet. She landed on a Cloud, and quickly threw Ze and Nova onto the ground.

"SHIT!" Nova yelled, his shoulder a bit aggravated. "Watch the wings, Dash!"

"Yes," Ze nodded. "Ze would like to learn to fly one Day....And Ze cannot do that if his Wing is harmed."

"Sorry guys," Rainbow Dash apologized, cracking her back. "You guys are just...REALLY heavy...."

"Yeah, Ze," Nova said, yelling at Ze. "Get on a treadmill, FATASS!" Rainbow laughed.

"Ze says this in the worst way he Possibly can.....FUCK YOU, NOVA." Ze yelled.

"I'll beat you with my left Wing!" Nova yelled.

"Ze will beat you with his dick!" Ze retorted.

Nova snickered. "You would...." Rainbow was ROCL'ing, Rolling On the Cloud Laughing.

"You guys have me in Tears!" Dash said, wiping out her eyes. "Seriously...."

"Ze takes all the credit for the Hilarity." Ze announced, smirking.

"Bullshit you do!" Nova said, yelling. "I'm funnier than you, and YOU KNOW IT."

"Ze thinks you are LYING!" Ze replied.

"I'LL BEAT DAT ASS!" Nova yelled.

"ZE SAYS YOU WILL NOT!"

"MY HOOF SAYS I WILL!"

Rainbow got in between the two, stopping their bickering. "Oh my gosh, guys....." She giggled some more. "I'm going to LOVE hanging out with you two!" Nova and Ze smiled.

"Ze thinks the same." Ze nodded.

"Yeah!" Nova screamed. "So, Dash. Where's your house?" Nova and Ze looked around, but all they saw was a bunch of clouds.

"You're standing on it." Rainbow announced.

"THE HELL?!" Nova yelled as Dash threw him to the next Cloud over. Ze laughed.

"Ze thinks this is a most comfortable house...." Ze fell back, pretty close to falling asleep already.

"You've got that right." Rainbow said. "This IS Cloudsdale, after all. All of the houses are made of Clouds."

"But how am I supposed to jerk off?" Nova thought, frowning. "There ain't no covers here! Everyone will see me handlin' mah bidness!"

"So," Rainbow started. "You guys wanna learn to Fly?"

"Hell yeah!" Nova screamed.

"Ze would like that very much." Ze nodded.

"Well, gets back down on the Ground." Dash suggested. "I'll teach you guys the basics, first."

"But.....We suck complete ASS!" Nova said.

"That's what's gonna make it funnier!" Rainbow giggled.

Ze and Nova trade unsure looks, but decided it was best to learn from the so called "Fastest Flier in Equestria"

Ze and Nova jumped on Rainbow's back, ready to learn how to fly. "MUSH, MOTHERFUCKER!" Nova yelled. Rainbow just rolled her eyes, and started to fly back to the ground.

Sweet Apple Acres

Applejack, Freddie, CM Punk, Damian, Kit and Tate had now arrived at Sweet Apple Acres. Freddie and Punk were ready to go to work. Freddie's kids however, were lazy, and spoiled, and wouldn't mind disagreeing.

"Welp, he we are...." Applejack said. "Home sweet home..."

Damian was the first to state the Obvious. "There's a lot of Apples here...."

"Well, of course, kiddo." Applejack replied, smiling. "We provide the Apples for everyone in Ponyville to eat."

"So you're farmers?" Kit asked.

"Purty much, I reckon." Applejack answered. "And now that ya'll are helpin' us, we'll git all these Apples harvested in record Time!" Kit, Damian, and Tate groaned. They estimated there were probably about 150 Apple trees. Well, actually, Kit was the one who did the estimation, since he was relatively smarter than his brothers.

"Calm down, you divas..." Freddie said. "It'll be fine. You aren't gonna die."

"You don't know that for SURE." Damian said, pouting.

"Kids." Punk said. "Listen to your dad, him and his Purple hair know what he's talking About." Freddie's kids laughed.

"Hey, man!" Freddie retorted. "You're supposed to have my back!"

Punk snickered. "Looks like you've got it all under control to me...."

"Hah hah hah." Freddie mocked, rolling his eyes. "It really wont be bad, sons. We'll have all of these apples in Baskets within the hour."

"A whole HOUR?" Tate gasped. "That's like.....30 minutes!" Everyone stared at the stupid Kid.

"Errr....An hour is 60 minutes, Tate." Applejack reinformed.

"Nuh uh!" Tate said, crossing his arms. "It's 30. My uncle Fred told me!"

"Tate..." Freddie said, putting a hoof on his son's shoulder. "Your uncle Fred is drunk all day, every day....."

"Aaaannnnnddd?" Tate asked.

"When you're drunk, you're stupid and always wrong." Freddie answered, trying to get his sons to get the Point.

"Hey!" Punk exclaimed. "I think you're drunk, Freddie!" Freddie's kids laughed once again. Freddie scowled.

"You suck, man...." Freddie said. "You really do...."

"Thanks!" Punk put on his best Troll face.

"Well, golleh, sis!" Big Macintosh said, joining the group with Apple Bloom and Granny Smith. "Ah didn't know you was bringin' visitors."

"Big Mac, Apple Bloom, Granny Smith. This is CM Punk, Freddie Hediger, and his sons, Damian, Kit, and Tate. They'll be helpin' us with Applebuck season." Applejack said, smiling confidently in her new Friends.

"Oh my..." Granny Smith said. "You sure do look like strong'uns...."

"Why, thank you, Granny Smith." Punk said. "We're happy to help. And we really appreciate you guys letting us stay here for a while."

"Eeeyup." Was all Big Mac could say. "We're happy ta welcome ya'll to Sweet Apple Acres! Let's give ya'll the tour."

"That's right, folks." Applejack said. "Follow us!"

Apple Bloom had noticed Kit, and even though she was only in Elementary School, it seemed as though she had just suffered her first case....Of Puppy love.

"Well, hai there, guys!'' Apple Bloom said, running up to Kit and his brothers.

"Well hi there, sweetie." Freddie said with a cute-struck smile. "You sure are the cutest Pony I've ever seen."

Apple Bloom blushed. "Well, shucks, Mr. Hediger! Ya don't need ta say that."

"Oh yeah I do!" Freddie nodded. "That little red Bow is so PRECIOUS! Tell you what, boys. If you don't wanna work, you can go play with Apple Bloom. Deal?"

"But DAAAADDDD," Damian whined. "She's a GIRL!"

"Yeah! Girls are gross!" Tate yelled. Apple Bloom was bothered by such words, and felt like kicking these Boys in the head.

".....Deal." Kit said, smiling.

"WHAT?!" Damian and Kit screeched at the same time.

"You guys are overreacting." Kit explained. "I'm sure you're LOADS of fun, Apple Bloom!" Just then, little imaginary hearts fluttered above Apple Bloom's head. She blushed like she never had before.

"Oh yeah!" Apple Bloom exclaimed. "Me and mah friends are always goin' on Adventures! It's TONS'a fun!"

Damian and Tate groaned. "Fine...." Damian said. "We'll hang out with you. But if you're lame.....Then we're gonna go work, instead." Tate nodded.

"Be nice, boys..." Freddie warned. "I have to take you to the School in a bit. If we are gonna be here for a while, I want you 3 to go to school Here."

The boys groaned even more now.

"That's so STUPID!" Tate said. "We don't WANNA go to Schooooooo-"

"Hey...." Freddie glared. "Shut up a bit, alright? You're going, and no amount of whining is gonna change my Mind." The kids crossed their arms. They had been defeated, they wouldn't get their way THIS time. Apple Bloom giggled.

Twilight's Library....

"Feel better?" Twilight asked, smiling.

"Oh yes! I feel like I could take on the world!" Austin smiled. Twilight had used her magic to relieve Austin's stress. She EVEN used it to Heal Austin's eye. Which means, no more eye-patch, and no more "Patchy the Pirate" jokes from the boys in the locker room! He was so SICK of those damn jokes!

"Happy to help!" Twilight exclaimed. "That eyepatch looked RIDICULOUS, anyway. Now you look.....Normal."

"I've been wanting that thing off ever Since I got injured." Austin stated. "Thank you, Twilight."

"No problem, Mr. Ross." Twilight smiled.

"Please....Call me Austin." Austin suggested.

"Alright. AUSTIN." Twilight said, trying to get used to the name, while also a bit curious as to why all humans had odd names, it seemed.

Upstairs, Spike was getting more Jealous by the Minute. This was almost as worse than when Owlicious came home. Twilight had talked to Austin since he had got there.

"Now...." Twilight started. "Tell me more about EARTH!" Austin raised an eyebrow, laughing. This pony was OBSESSED with Earth, it seemed.

"Well, alright." Austin said.

Spike sighed, deciding to go sleep in his Basket.

--------TO BE CONTINUED--------

Incesticide

///////////////

Sweet Apple Acres....


///////////////

"And this here's the barn," Applejack said. "I'm mighteh sorry ta say, but we don't have an extra room in the house, so ya'll will have to sleep in here." Applejack hoped her guests would be accustomed to the living conditions.

"Not a problem," Freddie said, poking his head into the barn. "We're on the road over 300 days a Year. We've slept in Hotels that could pass off as rat's nets." Freddie chuckled.

"Holy crap, don't talk about it, man!" Punk said, holding his head with his hooves, trying to forget about old stories. "I still have nightmares at night...A WHOLE bed, made out of cockroaches!" Punk cringed.

"And it only cost $400 a night!" Freddie exclaimed. "Pretty good deal, I'd say..." He nudged Punk in the abdomen.

"......You're stupid......" Punk said, his eyes bugged out. Applejack and Big Mac laughed.

"Sounds like ya'll have some mighteh fine stories ta tell." Big Mac said.

"Oh yeah we do!" Freddie said, grinning. "We'll have to tell them later. As long as the kids aren't around....They aren't exactly PG tales..." Freddie awkwardly grinned.

"We are NOT telling those stories, dude...." Punk demanded, shaking his head. "It's too risque. We should be in jail for what we've done." Freddie laughed.

"Are ya'll criminals or somethin'?" Applejack asked. Murderers had just left Ponyville, and I don't think they want any type of criminals either.

"Oh no, of course not." Freddie reassured the worried ponies. "We just aren't the most boring people in the World."

"We'd all love ta heard your stories." Big Mac said, smiling. "But right now, we need to teach ya'll how ta APPLEBUCK."

"Is that some type of farming thing?" Punk asked, Applejack and Big Mac nodded.

"Eeeeyup." Big Mac gave his one worded answer. "We need ta buck down all these apples in time for Applebuck Season." He explained as the 4 walked to the Apple Trees.

"Cool," Freddie said. "How do we do it?"

"All ya need ta do..." Applejack explained. "Is go right up ta a tree, lean forward, and with ya back hooves, kick with all your MIGHT!" Applejack demonstrated, kicking a tree full of Apples. They all fell off the branches, and landed on the ground. "Oops," Applejack smiled, embarrassed. "Guess we forgot ta get a basket for em'..."

"I'll get one." Big Mac volunteered, and he trotted off to the barn.

"Now, you guys try." Applejack said, gesturing towards the next tree.

Freddie went up to a tree, and did what he was told, but somehow only managed to fall on his stomach.

".......BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!" Punk busted up into laughter. "YOU-YOU......YOU FAAAIIILLLUURREEEEE!!!!" Punk left some more, as Freddie scowled.

"Let's see you try it, tough guy...." Freddie smirked.

"Alright, then...." Punk agreed, nodding, walking up to the tree. "Let me show you how it's done....." With that, Punk tried the same approach Freddie did, but just like him, only managed to fall on his face.

"Good job there, hardass...." Freddie said, mocking Punk. Punk just growled.

"Hmmmmm...." Applejack thought as Big Mac returned with a big basket. "Interestin', you guys are Rasslers right? Don't ya have any leg muscle?"

"Of course we do." Freddie answered. "We just.....Aren't used to these bodies."

"Well, why don't ya try ta knock the Apples down in a way that ya both are comfortable with?" Big Mac suggested.

"Great idea!" Freddie and Punk said simultaneously. They thought about it for a moment, then went to separate trees. Instead of mule kicking them, they simply performed a Muay Thai kick on the trees. It looked retarded in Pony bodies, but it did the trick. All of the Apples fell down from the tree, Big Mac was able to catch them all in the basket.

"That was a mighteh fine move there, ya'll!" Applejack said, stunned.

"...Eeeyup. What do ya'll call that style of Applebuckin'?" Big Mac asked, curious where the humans learned to buck like that.

Freddie and Punk thought about it for a while, but finally came up with the PERFECT name. "...Apple Thai." They answered at the same time, hoof bumping.

"Well, that 'Apple Thai' is purty darn impressive." Apple Jack said, Big Mac nodded in agreement. "Y'all are gonna have to teach us sometime." Punk and Freddie agreed to teach the hicks the way of the Dragon. Big Mac whispered something inaudible to Applejack, which caused her to get a sly smile on her face.

"Ummm....Y'all keep up that Apple Thai stuff. Me and Big Mac need to go...." Applejack tried to come up with an answer.

"We need to calculate the amount of profits expected for this season." Big Mac answered. "...Eeeeyup, that's it."

"That's right." Apple Jack nodded. "Cuz....It's important ta know how much money is expected."

"It's cool." Freddie said, already on his 5th Apple tree.

"Yeah, we can take it from here..." Punk said, on his 5th Apple tree, as well.

"Well all right, then!" Apple Jack said, excited. "Let's go, Big Macintosh...." She gave him a wink.

"...EEEEYUP!" Big Mac said his catchphrase with a lot more enthusiasm this time.

When they were out of hearing distance, Punk said something bold. "They're gonna get it on, man...." He snickered.

"No doubt. That's what rednecks do." Freddie agreed as he caught Punk's apples in the basket.

"They make it too obvious, though..." Punk laughed. "I mean, what a piss poor excuse..." Punk then put on his best southern drawl. "GooooooooooooLLLLEEEHH, I dun reckon we needa go calcuLLLAATTEEE the earnins' for this year's AppleBUCK Season, shuck em' UUUUUUPPPPPP!!!!!!!"

Freddie fell on the ground, laughing so hard he couldn't catch Punk's apples as most of them caught him right in the nuts. For this reason alone, Punk joined him in laughing, hysterically, that is.

Applejack and Big Mac were now inside the house, Granny Smith was, as usual, asleep in her rocking Chair. And it would take an Atomic Bomb 5 feet away from her ears to wake her up.

"Go put on something lacy...." Big Mac suggested, a sheepish grin on his face.

"Don't you fret..." Applejack said with a seductive grin. "I'll pick something to your liking...." With that, they kissed, and Applejack went upstairs to feed her hickish nature.

"Golleeehhhh...." Big Mac said, in love. "I sure am glad I picked her over Granny Smith!"

Flying Lessons with Rainbow Dash.....

Rainbow Dash paced in front of Ze and Nova. She had agreed to teach the two all she knew about flying, as long as they listened to every word they said. Of course, the two would HAVE to learn to fly if they wanted to be real Pegasus, so they easily accepted. Nova and Ze were standing, their chins up high, their chests puffed out, military style.

"So," Rainbow Dash started. "You two wanna be fliers, do ya?"

"SIR YES SIR!" Ze and Nova quickly yelled. Rainbow Dash quirked an eyebrow, and got right in their face.

" DO I LOOK LIKE I WOMAN TO YOU KNUCKLEHEADS?!" She yelled, bringing the men on the verge of crapping their pants.

"SIR NO....Sir?" They replied, still shaking.

Rainbow Dash facehoofed. This would be tougher than it seemed.

"Let's just drop the whole Military thing..." Dash suggested. Nova and Ze agreed.

"Okay." Dash started. "Now, if you wanna be just like me, all you need to do is WATCH me. If you watch my awesomeness, you will get the FEEL of it. And sooner or later, you two will be on your way to being as awesome as Me!" Rainbow Dash grinned in confidence. "Remember, I said AS awesome as me, not more awesome than me. That's just....Not possible. Basically, you'll be about 20% less awesomer than me."

"SHUT UP AND TEACH US." Nova said, shielding his ears from constant bragging.

"Eager, eh?" Dash smirked. "That's what I like to see. Just watch....." Dash reared back, and places her front hooves on the ground, and her back hooves way behind her. "And learn..." With that, Rainbow Dash was off. She started performing some amazing tricks she had learned over the Years. Nova and Ze watched in delight, but couldn't tell how Rainbow Dash was pulling all of this off, on account of her being so damn fast.

It lasted longer than they had expected, Rainbow had more moves than even she thought she did, but she soon returned back to the ground. "How was that?" She asked, putting on her Sunglasses, and crossing her arms.

"FUCKIN' SWEET!" Nova screamed. Him and Ze applauded.

"Thank you, thank you..." Rainbow bowed.

"Ze did not learn anything from watching you, though....." Ze said, scratching his head. "You're....Too fast for Ze...."

Rainbow Dash quirked an eyebrow. "Well....Your eyes just need to keep up!" Ze and Nova shared looks.

"....Yeah!" Nova agreed. "Stop fucking everything up, ZE!!!!!!! I learned shit...." He smirked.

"Oh REALLY?" Rainbow said, sensing Nova's lie. "Well, then, oh great Nova....SHOW ME WHAT YOU'VE GOT."

Nova gulped. "All-All right...." He went into his stance, and took off soon enough.

20 feet Away from this, was Horsepower, still doing his daily jog.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." Horsepower chanted while pacing himself. Just then, Nova crashed into his face, and for fear of his life, clung onto his hair.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no........NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" Horsepower screamed, trying to swat Nova off. Soon enough, Rainbow Dash flew over, and pulled Nova off of Horsepower's face.

"Sorry about that, Horsepower...." Rainbow apologized. Horsepower just looked at her.

"YYYYYYYEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.....Right." Horsepower stated, scowling. He then started running again. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." He chanted.

Rainbow looked at Nova, not surprised, but still disappointed in his performance. "Nova..." She said. "You didn't learn anything, did you?"

"I learned that that pony injects roids in his Asscheeks all day." Nova stated. Rainbow Dash couldn't take it, she started laughing again.

"Okay....Okay...." Rainbow said, in tears. "I guess I'll have to tell you guys how to be a good flier, step by step...."

Nova and Ze approvingly smiled at their trainer. "Alright....." Rainbow said. "Class....Is in session...."

Sweet Apple Acres.....

Back at Sweet Apple Acres, Freddie and Punk were still buckin' Apples, Apple Thai style. But upstairs, in the Apple Family house....Big Mac was about to be working hard, too....On Applejack....YEAH, I SAID IT.

Big Mac waited patiently outside his sister's room. He was ready to get it on right now. But just like he was told by his momma, "You always need to wait for the best things..." So Big Mac would need to wait for his FAVORITE thing in the world.....YUM YUM BUMP BUMP TIME WITH HIS SISTER. Yup, that's what I'm calling it.

"Okay," Apple Jack called from inside her room. "Desert's on....COOOMMMEE and get it, big boy...."

Big Mac literally started jumping in a Pinkie Pie-esque fashion. He opened the door quickly, and saw his sister sprawled on the bed, that same seductive grin on her face he had saw many times.

"Goooooooolllleeeehhhhhh....." Big Mac said, starting to drool. "What happened to all y'all's clothes?"

"Why do I need on clothes?" Applejack answered. "You were just gonna take em' off, anyway...."

"Good point." Big Mac said, chuckling.

"Speaking of POINT...." Applejack said. "You're lookin' extra pointy right now...." She grinned. Apple Jack was talking about Big Mac's penis. It was 3 times it's normal size, this only happened when he saw his sister in a position where he could give it to her like no other.

"Eh heh heh heh......" Big Mac laughed and grinned. "You like it?"

"I sure as hay do..." Apple Jack answered. She got off of the bed, and got down on all four's. Big Mac KNEW what was gonna happen next. As if on cue, Apple Jack opened her mouth, and wrapped her lips onto Big Mac's, well, Big Mac.

"Awwwhawhawhawwwwww........" Big Mac groaned in delight. Apple Jack continued to blow Big Mac's giant load. She stopped for one moment, and looked up at her brother.

"Ya like that, big boy?" Apple Jack asked.

"...Eeeyup, yup, yup, yup, yup!" Big Mac answered gleefully. Apple Jack then went back to handling her business, sucking Big Mac harder than she had ever done. The two siblings had been getting intimate with eachother since they were 14, all of their aunts and Uncles did it, so why couldn't they?

Big Mac started sweating bullets. The sweat rolled off his forehead, and landed on Applejack's head. This seemed to give the filly the Edge she needed to make Big Mac even hotter. She wrapped her tongue around her brother's sausage, and salivated on his pubic sack. Big Mac moaned in delight, and Apple Jack giggled as her work was done. Big Mac's sperm had launched into Apple Jack's mouth, she swished it in her mouth for a bit, and finally swallowed it. Big Mac grinned at the display, and so did his sister.

"Hey sis," Big Mac started. "Mind givin' me an old fashioned?" He was of course, talking about a Hoof-Job.

"Sure thing, sugarcube...." Apple Jack took her two front Hooves, clenched them together between Big Mac's penis, and started shaking.

"Awwwhaaawwwhaaawww....That's the Sspppoootttt...." Big Mac pleasurebly moaned. After a couple moments, Big Mac had ejaculated, and more sperm blew right up in Applejack's face, LITERALLY.

Apple Jack was going to get a towel to wipe of the residue, but Big Mac stopped her.

"Allow me, sis...." Big Mac suggested, as he bent down, and licked his own sperm off of his Sister's face.

Apple Jack smiled. "Oh, Big Mac, always a gentleman...."

"...Eeyup, that's me." He said proudly. "Now, let me give it to you like a gentleman...." Applejack moaned as Big Mac immediately started groping his sister's neck. After a while, he made his way to his sister's mouth. The two engaged in a passionate make-out session. It was official, Applejack and Big Mac were now donors for the first Annual Spit Drive. Their tongues traveled to and fro, around their mouth. The sperm still on Apple Jack's tongue, Big Mac didn't mind swallowing the contaminated substance. Soon, the two were playing a very competitive game of Tonsil Hockey, back and forth, back and forth, nopony seemed to be winning, and these siblings were fine with that.

"Enough of this foreplay nonsense!" Apple Jack exclaimed. "Let's clean these plates!"

"I can't say no ta that!" Big Mac chuckled. Big Mac promptly got behind his sister's flank, and started ramming his dick right in. It was a tight space, but it still fit enough to make Applejack squeal like a greasy pig. Big Mac started ramming harder and harder, the harder he rammed, the louder she screamed, the happier Big Mac got.

"Ah sure hope you didn't forget about mah front..." Apple Jack hinted.

"Course not. Hold on." Big Mac finished up his business in the back, Apple Jack laid down on the bed. And Big Mac began to work on his sister's nether region.

Big Mac ran his tongue in a complete 360 degree circle around Apple Jack's vagina, his tongue swirled like a vortex, ready to suck them both in. And suck, is what Big Mac did. He puckered his lips, and began to suck away at his sister's pussy, which made Applejack moan in Glee. Then, Big Mac's penis came into play. In, out, in, out, in, out. The vicious cycle went on for many minutes...Just like old Times.

Meanwhile....

Freddie and Punk were already half-way done with the Apple Bucking. They counted only 50 trees out of 100 left.

"I gotta go to the bathroom." Freddie said, he put the basket down, and walked to the Apple Family house. Punk smirked, pretty much KNOWING what Freddie was going to do.

Freddie was now inside, he saw Granny Smith inside, asleep in her rocking Chair, of course. He didn't know where his sons and Apple Bloom had ventured off to, but he trusted they knew where they were going. Freddie quietly tip-toed up the steps, and arrived at Apple Jack's room. He had heard the moaning, which should've been proof enough, but Freddie thought Big Mac may have just been giving his sister the Heimlich maneuver. Their door was open just enough for Freddie to see the action. "Well, she's choking all right...On dick." Freddie thought. The siblings were still going at it hot and heavy on their bed. Freddie had all the proof he needed, and then left to go back outside and help finish up the Apple Bucking.

When Punk saw him again, he asked the simple question. "Well?"

Freddie smirked, knowing what Punk was asking. "All I can say is, those two are VERY close towards one another...." Freddie and Punk laughed, and began to work some more.

-------TO BE CONTINUED-------

Why Are You Here?

After many more minutes of constant sexual gymnastics, Big Mac's sperm cells entered Applejack's uterus, good thing she was on birth control.

"That was the best one yet, sis..." Big Mac exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear.

"Glad ta be of service ta ya, Big Mac." Apple Jack said, making out with her brother once again. "We'd better go back and help those two."

"Eeeyup." Big Mac said, nodding. "They probably half way done bah now."

Big Mac and Apple Jack stepped out of their room, but they were greeted by some home intruder of some kind.

"Nice to see you." The random guy said, eyeing the two lovers all around.

"WHAT IN THE HAY?!" Apple Jack screamed. "GIT OUTTA OUR HOUSE!"

"I'm Chris Hansen...." The man in the suit said. "I'm here to arrest your brother."

"Eeee...WHAT?!" Big Mac yelled, a shocked look on his face.

"What's your name, sir?" Hansen asked.

"...Big Mac...." Big Mac stuttered to say.

"Well, Big Mac...." Hansen started. "....What are you doing here?"

"Havin' sex with mah sister." Big Mac said proudly, his chin up in the air. Apple Jack facehoofed.

"No you're not...." Hansen said, shaking his head. "You were molesting your sister....."

"Ah was WHAT?!" Big Mac said, still shocked.

"MOLESTING." Hansen answered. "One word, nine letters. The definition is-"

"I know what Molestin' means!" Big Mac yelled. Did this guy think he was STUPID?

"Why don't you have a seat?" Hansen gestured to the floor, since there were no chairs around.

"Wah?" Big Mac asked, perplexed.

"So we can talk about what you've done here today." Hansen said.

"I was havin' sex with mah sister!" Big Mac said, once again. "You got hearin' problems?"

"No," Hansen said. "But you seem to have mental problems...."

"Ah WHAT?!"

"You're not supposed to molest your sister, Mr. Mac." Hansen answered.

"It's.....It's a family tradition." Big Mac retorted, getting sick of these mind games.

"I'm....I'm stunned..." Was all Big Mac could say.

"Because you got caught," Hansen stated. "That's why you're stunned!"

"Sir," Apple started. "Mah brother didn't molest me. We were...Having sex, that's all....."

".....That doesn't make it any less weirder." Hansen said. "Did you use a condom, Mr. Mac?"

Big Mac stared at the ground, a bit sad. "....No."

Suddenly, Hansen smiled. "Atta boy! That'll teach you two hicks to have sex again. Now you have a child. Well, I better get going, need to find more freaks like you two." With that, Hansen walked out of the Apple Family house, leaving the siblings stunned.

"Big Mac," Apple Jack said. "You got any idea what in tarnation just happened?"

"Eeenope." Big Mac simply said.

"Am I.....PREGNANT?" Apple Jack asked, her eyes bugging out.

"Eeeeprobably." Big Mac said, nodded. Applejack groaned in disgust.

Meanwhile.....

Apple Bloom and Damian, Kit and Tate were now in the middle of town. Talking, well, mostly Apple Bloom and Kit were talking while Tate and Damian gagged.

"So," Apple Bloom said. "Ya'll goin' to Ponyville Elementary tomorrow?"

"Yeah." Damian replied. "It STINKS!" He crossed his arms.

"Maybe school here isn't so bad!" Kit said, trying to look on the bright side. "Umm....Right, Apple Bloom?" He hoped she'd give him the answer he hoped for.

"Oh it's AWESOME!" Apple Bloom replied, making the boys smile with glee. "Ms. Cheerilee is the bestest teacher in the history of bestest teachers. One day, she even let us hoola hoop all until class was over!" The boys jaws dropped. On earth, the funnest thing their Teacher let them do was.....Sit down and shut up.

"Sounds too good to be true..." Damian said, looking at Apple Bloom like she was lying.

"Oh no! It's the best!" Apple Bloom said honestly. Damian and Tate shared looks, and just shrugged.

"I'll guess we can take your word for it." Damian said, Apple Bloom smiled.

"Just one warning, though..." Apple Bloom said, finally getting Tate's attention.

"Uh huh?" Tate said, curious.

"Watch out for a girl named Diamon' Tiara..." The boys quirked their eyebrows.

"Diamond Tiara?" Kit said. "Sounds.....spoiled...."

"That's EXACTLY what she is!" Apple Bloom exclaimed, causing the boys to worry. "Her daddeh is the guy that gave your daddeh the 10,000 bits at the town Meetin'."

"Ooooohhhh!" The boys all said simultaneously.

"We'll have to thank her for that!" Tate said, grinning. Damian and Kit looked at him stupidly. "What? Our dad EARNED that money!" Damian and Kit nodded.

"What does her dad do, anyway?" Kit asked.

"Hay if I know...." Apple Bloom said, giggling. "During family Appreciation day....We all fell asleep while he was talking!" This made the boys laugh.

"Hey Apple Bloom!" The four heard voices from behind them. When they turned around, they saw a Scooter wielded Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle approaching them.

"Hey gals!" Apple Bloom said, smiling, happy to see her fellow Crusaders.

"Oh no..." Tate whispered to Damian. "MORE girls....." Damian chuckled.

"Sweeteh Belle, Scootaloo," Apple Bloom said, gesturing towards the boys. "This is Damian, Kit, and Tate. They're new in town." The boys waved, even though two of them didn't want to. I'm sure you can figure out which two that would be.

Sweetie Belle stared at Damian, perplexed at how cute the little colt was. And Scootaloo, was staring at Tate, also thinking about how cute he was, and also mentally hitting herself for thinking about BOYS!

"Ummm....I think they're robots...." Tate said, referring to the two fillies not saying or doing anything but thinking about them.

Apple Bloom put one of her hooves in front of their faces, and waving it. "Earth to Scootaloo and Sweeteh Belle......WAKE UP!" Finally, the two Fillies shook their heads.

"....What?" Scootaloo said, dazed. "Oh. Nice to meet you, dudes." She said, trying to keep her usually cool composure.

"HiiiiiIIIIIIIII..." Was all Sweetie Belle could say. It was official, she and Scootaloo had the case of puppy love, although the boys were too young to figure it out.

"Hey!" Tate yelled at Scootaloo. "Are you a chicken?"

Scootaloo's face turned red. "Not this again...." She thought. "No, I am a pony. Are YOU a chicken?" She retorted.

"Yup." Tate said. "Wanna be chicken buddies?" He smiled.

Scootaloo's heart skipped a beat. Was this cute, young colt, actually asking her to be FRIENDS with him. Actually, his real words were "Chicken Buddies", whatever that means, she would accept the offer.

"S-S-Sure..." She stuttered, smiling.

"Coolio!" Tate said. "Nice scooter, chicken."

"Thanks." Scootaloo replied. "Wanna ride it.....CHICKEN?"

Tate smirked. He wish he had his Scooter with him, he could beat this girl in a race. "No way. Too girly."

Scootaloo gasped. She was NOT, in any way, shape or form.....GIRLY. "You take that back...." She said.

"Okay, I will...." Tate replied. Scootaloo smirked. She may like him, but she will kick his ass if he continues to make fun of her. "On one condition...." He said.

"Name it." Scootaloo replied.

"You beat me in a Scooter race....." Tate said, causing his brothers to gasp.

"DEAL!" Scootaloo said. There was NO WAY she'd lose to this little.....CHICKEN. "But, hey, where's YOUR scooter?"

"I had one." Tate answered. "But not when we were.....What's the word I'm looking for, bro?" He asked Kit.

"Transferred." Kit said.

"What are you, are dictionary?" Scootaloo and Tate asked the same time, causing both of them to smile.

"Whoa....Nice!" Tate said, causing Scootaloo to smile and blush. She KNEW she would like Tate. "I didn't have a scooter when we were.....Transferred here. So, I'll just have to find another one."

"If doesn't matter what kind of Scooter you find, man...I'm STILL gonna beat ya!" Scootaloo boasted, causing Tate to chuckle.

"We'll see. I'm gonna ruffle up your feathers, you CHICKEN!" Tate highhoofed his brothers. Scootaloo smirked. She LOVED a challenge, with this boy's confidence, it seemed like he would give her a pretty though challenge to handle.

A few seconds later, Freddie and CM Punk had found the boys and girls. "Hey there, squirts!" Freddie said.

"You're already done with work, dad?" Damian asked.

"Awww yeah!" Punk said. "Me and your old man didn't even need the Apples' help." Punk and Freddie highhoofed.

"Where were mah sister and brother?" Apple Bloom asked.

"They went inside the house to....." Freddie snickered. ""Calculate" the Apple sales for this season. We got done while they were all in there."

"What are you doing, now?" Tate asked, hoping it wasn't what he thought.

"I'm taking you guys to get signed up for School." The boys groaned.

"Don't worry, guys." Sweetie Belle said. "School is AWESOME!"

"Yeah," Scootaloo nodded. "Ms. Cheerilee is the best teacher in Equestria." This made the boys feel loads better now that THREE ponies had told them this.

"Dad." Tate said. "Once we get signed up, you need to buy me a Scooter."

"Why?" Freddie asked.

"I'm gonna beat Scoots' here in a Scooter race!" Tate said with glee.

"Sure." Freddie agreed. "I've got enough bits to buy you FIFTY Scooters!" Tate's eyes bugged out. "I didn't say I would be doing that, though..." Tate frowned, Punk chuckled.

"So, I guess you guys made some friends?" Punk said, gesturing to The Cutie Mark Crusaders.

"I guess." Damian said, shrugging. "I mean, they're girls and all....But they seem cool." The CMC's smiled at the THOUGHT of the boys thinking they were COOL!

"Well, good." Freddie said smiling at his son's early success in this town. "What are you gonna be doing, Phil? Ya know, while I take these guys to get signed up."

"I think I may take these little fillies to Sugarcube Corner." Punk said, smiling. "Maybe they can get their Cutie Mark in getting fat on Sweets." The CMC's thought that would be a pretty killer talent. Not very on the healthy side, though.

"All right." Freddie said. "See you all later."

"BYE, BOYS!" Sweetie Belle screamed at the top of her lungs.

"Bye, um, Sweaty Balls." Damian said, forgetting the girl's name. Punk laughed at loud.

"Sweaty Balls?" Sweetie Belle frowned.

"That's just too RICH..." Punk said, still laughing. "You girls ready to go PIG OUT?"

"Mr. Brooks," Sweetie Belle said. "My sister says I shouldn't talk to strangers..." Scootaloo nodded.

"Don't worry, girls." Apple Bloom stated. "Phil's a RASSLER, he'll protect us. Won't ya, Phil?"

"If anything happens to one of you, Sweetie Belle, tell your sister to make me a frilly dress. Because I'll wear it." Punk said, causing the CMC's to giggle.

"I hope some stupid fuck doesn't try anything..." Punk thought. "I am NOT wearing that damn dress!"

-----TO BE CONTINUED-----

P.S: Punk's a pedo.

Signing Up

Freddie and his Children arrived at Ponyville Elementary School about 20 minutes later. Since they were still new, they needed directions from multiple civilians that they met while walking. Once they got there, they had to sit in chairs and wait to talk to the Principal, doctor's office style.

"Ready to meet your new Principal, boys?" Freddie asked his kids.

"No. She'll probably be MEAN." Tate said. Damian nodded.

"Yeah! Just like our principal back home." Damian added, cringing at the thought of Mrs. Ruhfkhar.

"You guys just need to have faith." Kit said, smiling. "This place seems really Nice, so I'm sure the staff will be, too."

"Kit has the right idea." Freddie said. "I'll be in there to yell at the teacher, too, if she turns all lippy." The boys laughed at the memories of their dad calling Mrs. Ruhfkhar a "Dumb bitch."

Just then, the Principal's secretary, Mrs. Lowpayingjob called out to the Hediger's, telling them the Principal was ready to see them. They saw a boy and his mother rush out of the office, crying. The kids gulped.

"What was that you said about faith, dad?" Damian asked, shaking.

"Don't worry, you three." Freddie said, trying his best not to look scared. "I'm here. Plus, there is no way some pony principal is gonna make me cry!"

The boys and their Father walked into the office of Principal Peachtree. The principal smiled. She didn't look scary at all, she almost looked...Peaceful. AND PEACHY, of course.

"Hello." The principal said, still smiling. "My name is Mrs. Peachtree. What can I do for you?"

"Well, Mrs. Peachtree..." Freddie said. "I just wanted to sign up my children for school here."

"Ah, of course..." Mrs. Peachtree said, pulling out three Application forms. "Fill these out please, Mr?"

"Hediger." Freddie answered. "Freddie Hediger. These are my sons, Kit, Damian, and Tate." The three boys nervously waved.

"You three look scared..." Mrs. Peachtree said, a bit worried. As a Principal, she was trained in Child Psychology, so she knew how to spot when something was troubling children. "What's wrong?"

"They're just a bit worried." Freddie said, beginning to fill out Kit's form first. "They saw a boy and his mother run out of your office crying. And they just think you're some scary witch or something."

Mrs. Peachtree chuckled. "Oh, darlings. That boy and his mother were crying because this is their last day in Ponyville. They are moving to Manehatten, and cried because they will be missing us."

The boys immediately sighed in relief. "So, you're not mean?" Tate asked.

Mrs. Peachtree laughed. "I can't recall ever being called scary, or mean." The boys sighed in relief again, and even smiled.

While Freddie finished signing the application Forms, the boys new Principal and his sons chatted. It was the first time the boys stopped worrying, and were finally happy in Ponyville. Freddie occasionally looked over at his sons, and smiled at their happiness.

"There ya go." Freddie said, handing Ms. Peachtree the forms. She looked them over for a few moments, and then nodded. "Great!"

"Mrs. Peachtree?" Damian said. "Can we be assigned to Ms. Cheerilee's class?"

"So, I take it some of her students have told you what a great Teacher she is?" She asked. The boys nodded. "Well, they're right. Ms. Cheerilee is the greatest Teacher I've seen in my 13 years of being this School's principal." The boys grinned from ear to ear. If the PRINCIPAL of the school says a teacher is great, that means she's great.

"I'll pencil you three in for her class," Mrs. Peachtree stated, causing the boys to smile even more. "I can see you are eager to start."

"Oh yes," Freddie said. "I will be getting their supplies at the General Store tonight. They'll be all ready to start tomorrow."

"That will not be necessary, Mr. Hediger." Mrs. Peachtree said, causing Freddie to smile confusingly. "This school already has all of the Supplies ready for the students."

"SWEET!" Freddie yelled enthusiastically. "MORE BITS FOR ME!" Mrs. Peachtree laughed.

"I am pleased to welcome you three to Ponyville Elementary..." Mrs. Peachtree said, extending her hoof. The three boys shook it. And then they were off, waving goodbye to Mrs. Peachtree and her secretary, what's her stupid face.

"Kit, dad, you were right!" Damian and Tate said simultaneously. "Mrs. Peachtree isn't mean!"

"School here sounds awesome." Kit said with a smile.

"It even supplies EVERYTHING for you three!" Freddie said with a giant grin. "Now, I can spend more of my bits on that scooter, Tate...." He said with a wink.

"AWW YEAH!" Tate yelled in excitement. Freddie laughed, and put his arms around his sons.

Sugarcube Corner....

"Do I REALLY have to wear this damn Apron?" Marcus asked, groaning about his work uniform. It was PINK, of all colors, and had many girly symbols on it. Like flowers, and cute little animals, along with many other things that made Marcus's blood circulate backwards.

"YES!" Pinkie giggled. "Why? Is there something wrong with it?"

"I FUCKING LOOK GAY...." Marcus said simply.

"Yes! You do look happy, Marcus!" Pinkie giggled. "VERY happy!"

"The other kind of gay...." Marcus replied.

"Oh...." Pinkie frowned. "Alright. You can take it off." Marcus sighed in relief, and quickly threw the apron on the Ground. Pinkie gasped at the mean deed.

"You could've atleast handed in to me..." Pinkie replied, a bit sad. With that, Marcus picked it back up, and threw it at Pinkie's face. Pinkie gasped again, a bit more sadder now.

"You're not gonna cry, are ya....?" Marcus asked, not wanting to deal with this shit right now. Pinkie nodded. "Goddammit....Pinkie, I'm sorry." He didn't mean the apology, he just didn't want her to cry, it'd make him look like a dick, which he had already looked Like.

"GOT YA!" Pinkie said, laughing. The sad look on her face no longer visible. Marcus hit his head on the wall in frustration. "Awww...Don't be so mad, Marky! I ALWAYS do that to my best friends!"

"You're creepy, you know that, right?" Marcus asked. Pinkie nodded, Marcus' eyes bugged wide. Did she just....Admit that she was creepy? "Uhhh....What?"

"Well, duh!" Pinkie said obviously. "Of course I'm creepy! I take baths in melted Cotton Candy, and rinse out my toothpaste with chocolate syrup!"

"That's....NOT what I meant...." Marcus said, sighing. "You seem to have a screw loose..."

Marcus had noticed, as soon as he finished his sentence, Pinkie appeared to be screwing in a loose bolt with a screwdriver. "Thanks, Marky!" She exclaimed with high gratitude and a smile. "That things been hanging outside my head for WEEKS!"

Marcus seemed dumb-founded by what had just transpired. He hadn't seen that bolt until a few seconds ago, AND HE WASN'T TALKING ABOUT A LITERAL. FUCKING. SCREW. "So, about this job....You cook, and I take orders?"

"Yup a yup a yup." Pinkie said, nodding.

"Don't you ever have a lot to Bake?!" Marcus asked, wondering how she could of done this by herself.

"I'm REALLY fast." Pinkie explained. "But sometimes, I start to lose a bit of my....FIRE. So I just eat another cupcake, and I'm good to go!"

"Who took the orders before I got here, then?" Marcus asked, curious.

"Me!" Pinkie said excitedly. "Like I said, I'm REALLY fast. Plus, it's not like this is the busiest place in this Town."

"Isn't there at least ONE item that would take a lot of time and....Ya know, energy to make?" Marcus asked.

"Well..." Pinkie thought. "There is ONE item.....It's the biggest one on the menu."

"What is it?" Marcus asked.

"It's called.....THE SUPER DUPERY DUPERY DUPER DUPPA DUPPITY DUPE DUPPATRON 593,000!" Marcus gritted his teeth at the amount of Dupe's. "Or....As the Cakes called it....The Cornucopia of Dupe!" Pinkie giggled. "But, nopony's EVER ordered that before. It's just TOO MUCH to eat!"

All of a sudden, the bell on the door rang. Into the sweets shop walked Punk, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom.

"Hey, Pinks. Hey, Marky...." Punk snickered. Marcus growled, and Pinkie waved.

"Hi guys!" Pinkie said, happiness always in her voice. "What can I do for ya?"

"What should we get, girls?" Punk asked the three. They thought about it for a while, but Sweetie Belle gasped, and finally spoke up.

"We'll take one of The Cornucopia's of Dupe!" Sweetie Belle yelled with glee. Pinkie gasped, and Marcus cringed.

"Nopony's......Ever ordered that Before...." Pinkie said, beginning to tremble.

"We've made history!" Scootaloo said, smirking.

"What IS the Cornucopia of Dupe, anyway?" Punk asked.

"It's a HUMONGOUS cupcake, with Strawberry, Vanilla, and Peach ice cream, topped with chocolate Sauce, gum-drops, crunchy chocolate chip cookies, licorice, and gum-drops!" Marcus, Punk, and The CMC's mouth literally FELL on the floor.

"That....Sounds.....AWESOME!!!!" Punk said, ready to eat this Awesomeness all by himself. "Why PEACH ice cream, though?"

Pinkie shrugged. "Not too sure....Guess cuz it makes it feel PEACHY!" Pinkie grinned. Joke drum.....Marcus rolled his eyes.

"We'll take one of them bad boys!" Punk said, slamming the 8 bits on the Table.

"Whoa." Apple Bloom said. "How'd ya get that much Money already?"

"Your sister and brother paid me and Freddie after we were done." Punk explained. "I've got 12 more bits." Marcus put the 8 bits in the cash register.

"Get the lead out, Pinkie!" Marcus said. "You said you were fast!"

"Oh...." Pinkie said, giggling. "Hush up, Marky. There's LOTS of ingredients in this thing. And I'm ALSO making it for my friends, I want it to be PERFECT!"

"I can't wait to taste it!" Scootaloo said, licking her lips. "But, Punk. Why were you so nice to take us here?"

"There's two reasons for why..." Punk explained. "One...I AM nice. Two.....I AM hungry." The CMC's laughed.

"He probably wants to make some more Friends, too." Sweetie Belle added.

"Oh yeah, that's the third Reason." Punk said, nodding. "Plus, seeing Marcus Sims open up that old fashioned cash register just MAKES. MY. DAY!"

Marcus snarled. "When your order is ready....I'm gonna chuck it right at your face, Phil."

Pinkie giggled, dashing around quickly. "Marky, be nice to the customers!"

"Stop calling me that...." Marcus demanded. "Or I'll drive all of your customers AWAY!"

"I think he likes her..." Sweetie Belle whispered.

"Oh yeah." Punk agreed, nodding. "You'd think they'd be married already!" The CMC's giggled.

Twilight's Library....

Spike kept tossing and turning in his basket, Twilight and Austin Ross had been talking ever since he got to Ponyville. Spike wouldn't be sleeping, or even TRY to be sleeping at this time of day. But, truth be told, he was jealous of Austin. Just like the kind of jealousy when Owlicious first came into the library. After many minutes, Spike finally gave up. He took his basket, and went down to the lab to Sleep. Hopefully, he wouldn't be able to HEAR anybody.

"What's wrong with Spike?" Austin asked, concerned.

Twilight giggled. "He's probably just jealous....The same thing happened when we got our owl, Owlicious."

"Oh..." Austin replied, frowning.

"Don't worry," Twilight reassured. "He will get over it soon. Just give him some time."

"You sure?" Austin asked, not convinced.

"Of course I'm sure." Twilight said, nodding. "Now....Tell me more about...."

Austin chuckled. "Earth?"

Twilight sighed with happiness. "Yes....EARTH..."

"What's with you and Earth?" Austin asked, curious.

"I've studied it for awhile..." Twilight explained. "And now that I'm in the presence of an actual inhabitant of it....I'd like to learn all they know about it."

"How about YOU tell me more about PONYVILLE?" Austin asked, tired of talking about Earth. If Twilight lived there for a week, she'd want to kill herself, anyway.

"Ugh...Fiiiinneee." Twilight said, smiling. Austin chuckled.

Fluttershy's Cottage....

Fluttershy and Ryback were enjoying the singing choir of Birds Fluttershy owned. Fluttershy was surprised the big guy wasn't sucking on a bird's head just yet.

"So..." Fluttershy started. "You like animals?" Ryback nodded, not saying a word.

"Me too." Fluttershy smiled. "It's just so great to take care of so many Animals in need." Ryback just smiled.

"You aren't a big talker....Are you Ryback?" Fluttershy asked. Ryback nodded "no".

"Are you shy?" Fluttershy asked. "Because if so, there's nothing wrong with that....I'm shy, too. I know, hard to imagine, right?" Fluttershy giggled. Ryback once again, nodded "no".

"Oh..." Fluttershy thought about what could cause such a large man to not have a Larger than Life personality, she then gasped. "You must be a troubled soul..." She hit the nail RIGHT on the head. Ryback nodded sadly.

"Oh....No wonder..." Fluttershy replied. "Would you like to talk about your problems?" Ryback nodded no. He felt like talking to someone, but he really didn't have any problems. He had always been a troubled soul. Nothing triggered it, it was just always like that. Upon birth, he broke the doctor's index finger by sinking his teeth into it.

"Well, that's okay...." Fluttershy said, smiling. "You may be troubled.....But it's proven that the Quiet ones....Always have the best Qualities." Ryback was curious about what she was talking about, but just decided to smile.

Carousel Boutique....

Rarity had sewed all of the ripped clothes back together. She had glued the mannequin's heads back on their shoulders. She was now starting to make some more of her fabulous designer scarfs.

"Hmmm...." Rarity thought. "While Engineer may not be here right now....I still feel....Surprisingly calm...." A few moments later, Zane and Nathan, who was carrying Opal, came back from the guest Room.

"Hey, Rarity?" Zane asked.

"Why, yes Darlings?" Rarity said, not looking back from her scarf.

"Is there ANYTHING we can help you with?" Nathan asked, stroking Opal's fur.

"Not really." Rarity replied. "As you can see, I am a TRUE natural at this. I've never needed an assistant. And I never will."

Zane and Nathan frowned. "Well, atleast we get you WATCH you work...." Zane said, drooling. At this, Rarity's eyes bulged, and she started to think that allowing these two to enter her home may have been a bad idea....

"Is that a compliment, sweetie?" Rarity asked.

"Of course." Nathan asked. "You're the hottest pony in Equestria! Watching you do your stuff only makes our stay THAT much better..." Rarity smiled awkwardly.

"Forgive me for disliking your choice of words...." Rarity retorted. "I....Am not.....'Hot'. I am beautiful, generous, DAZZLING, I am....A proper lady. Only a Jezebel would enjoy being called....'Hot'....."

"You're one stone cold bitch is what you are..." Nathan said, getting ready to smack her Ass. Luckily, along with being insulted by these under-demeaning words, out of the corner of her eye, Rarity noticed Nathan about to touch her rump. He had no chance in hell, though, Rarity surprised him by judo flipping him onto his back. Nathan groaned in pain, as Opal ran away from the action.

"You keep your DISGUSTING hands off my BUM!" Rarity screamed. "It is NOT for you two to defile!"

"I am SO sorry...." Zane apologized, glaring at Nathan. "Miss Rarity, I didn't know he was going to do tha-" Before he could finish, Rarity gave him a Karate kick right on the bridge of the nose. Zane crumpled to the floor, his nose bleeding.

"I am sorry I had to do that..." Rarity said, breathing hard, and still giving the boys looks that could kill. "But, as long as you are in this house....You will respect everypony, and everyTHING in it...With nothing but the utter most respect. Am I clear?" The boys didn't answer, they were too busy groaning in pain. Rarity decided she'd change her decibels. "AM I CLEAR!?!?!?!?" She yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Y....Yes, Miss...." Zane said, rubbing his nose with his hoof.

"Loud and clear...." Nathan said, not able to move from the force he had just sustained.

"Good..." Rarity smiled. "Now, let me get some Gauze for you, Zane...."

Flight School with Rainbow Dash.....

Rainbow Dash was loyal, but she was anything but Patient. Ze and Nova must have crashed up to a total of 100 times so far, without ANY progress.

"Come on, guys...." Rainbow said, getting bored with failing. "You're making me SICK! What's the problem?"

"What's the problem?!" Nova yelled, as if it wasn't obvious.....

"Ze will put it, short and sweet...." Ze said, taking a deep breath. "We fucking suck cock."

"I hadn't notice...." Rainbow said. "Look, guys...Do you WANT to be awesome like ME?"

"If you become a more awesome Coach....Sure fucking thing!" Nova said, getting tired of falling from the sky.

"Ze agrees..." Ze said. "All you have done to us is YELL!"

"Because that's all your Thick heads understand." Rainbow said. "I can't be all nice. When you guys actually learn to FLY....Then, yeah, I'll be nice! But until then, you get the point, and make me PROUD!"

"Yes, Ma'am...." Nova and Ze said simultaneously, groaning.

"Good...." Rainbow said, smirking. "Now, let's try this crap AGAIN."

Sweet Apple Acres....

Applejack and Big Mac stood side by side, looking across their farm. They were worrying about their own relationship. Big Mac didn't mind having children, but who would take care of the Farm while he was taking care of Applejack? Sure, they had Freddie and Phil now, but that's a bit of a rude Thing to do to your guests. Ya know, dictate them to take care of your farm all because you had to be in too much of a hurry to screw your sister, that you couldn't even put a condom on.

"Big Mac...." Applejack started. "Ah'm scared...."

"Me too, sis..." Big Mac said, looking out into the wide open space.

"What if ah AM pregnant? What happens ta the farm?"

"Ah'm not sure, sis...." Big Mac wondered. "What if you aren't pregnant? That little bastard stalker doesn't know what he's talking about."

"But ah ain't on any Birth Control." Applejack stated. "And you didn't use a condom today. Whah didn't you? Ya usually do."

"Ah was just in a hurry ta have ya..." Big Mac smiled.

Applejack KNEW that wasn't it. Her brother was hiding something, and she wanted to know WHAT. "Big Mac....Ya always say that. And ah believe ya most of the times, but this time, Ah know you're just flat lying."

Big Mac was caught, he had made the decision to tell his sibling the truth, and see how she would react. "Alright, sis....Ah'll tell ya....But, it's pretty big...."

Applejack wanted to know what her brother was thinking about. They had been in a secret relationship since she was 14, and her brother hardly EVER lied to her. The curiosity was killing her. "What could be so BIG that ya have ta resort ta lying ta me?" Applejack asked. There was the longest of silences, before finally, Big Mac let it all out.

".....I wanna have a baby...." Big Mac said.

------TO BE CONTINUED------

I must LOVE ending these Chapters on cliffhangers, don't I?

The Hunger Games

"You WHAT?!" Applejack screamed, shocked beyond belief. Her brother had just said he wanted a child. He had never consulted with her about this, they had talked about having Babies before, but Big Mac said he wasn't ready yet, and Applejack agreed, so they just stopped the baby conversations altogether, that was sometime last Year. And now, the bombshell had been dropped.

"Ah wanna have have a baby, sis...." Big Mac said, looking at the ground.

"Ah don't understand." Applejack said, blinking. "We've talked about this stuff numerous times before, and ya always said ya weren't ready."

"Ah wasn't sure before. So I did something I may have regretted...." Big Mac said, tears starting to form? Applejack gasped. What could her brother have done?

"What'ya do?" Applejack asked, worried.

"Ah've been spiking your drinks with Birth Control pills every day since last Month." Big Mac said, looking in the eyes of his sister. Applejack gasped.

"But...Why?" She asked, concerned about her brother's thoughts.

"Ah wasn't sure about it yet...." Big Mac explained. "But now I realize, ah WANT a baby. And ah WILL stop spikin' your drinks, sis."

Applejack looked at the ground. This was all too much for her to process, two giant secrets had just been revealed to her. She almost wanted to run away, like she had before when she was younger. But the more she thought about it, the more she thought it was a great idea.

"Alright...." Applejack said, suddenly smiling. "Let's have a baby." Big Mac's jaw dropped, he expected an argument, or just a simple no, and that would be it. But his sister had just yes to being the mother of his child.

"Are.....Are ya sure, sis?" Big Mac asked, not wanting to goat his sister into this situation if she didn't want to do it.

Applejack smiled. "I sure as hay am, Big Mac. We'll need ta wait a while. Ya know, cuz them birth control pills need to expire." Big Mac nodded.

"A'course, a'course." Big Mac said, and the two siblings hugged. It was sure to be a happy time at Sweet Apple Acres. "What about the farm?"

"We'll figure it out, don't you worry." Applejack answered, making Big Mac feel better.

Carousel Boutique...

Rarity came back from the bathroom with some Gauze for Zane's bloodied nose. Nathan didn't need any medical attention, although Rarity thought about cutting his hooves off so to keep her rump from being smacked in the Future, but she quickly brushed off the evil side of her mind.

"Here you go, darling..." Rarity said, applying the gauze to Zane's nostrils. "Hold that by your nose for a while, it will absorb the blood." Rarity smiled.

"I did not know you could judo Flip...." Nathan said, still not able to move off his back.

Rarity giggled. "I may be a proper lady, but I know how to defend myself in dangerous situations." She then noticed Nathan hadn't moved yet. "Are you alright? You haven't moved in quite a while."

"Just star struck...." Nathan said, grinning.

"I am not from your planet..." Rarity began. "But I must concur that Humans do not date, or, in your case, try to....." Rarity sighed. "What's the word I'm looking for.....Violate! Yes, that's it. Humans do not violate a Ponies body on Earth, do they?"

Zane and Nathan nodded no. "Not unless they're creeps...." Zane said, applying pressure on his nose.

"Then....Why would you INSIST on being so.....Forceful with me?" Rarity asked curiously.

Zane and Nathan blushed, not wanting to tell this to a Pony. "On Earth....." Nathan started. "We aren't exactly considered the most....SMOOTH Humans."

Rarity gasped, regretting that she asked the question. "Oh....." She frowned. "I'm sorry...."

"It's alright." Zane replied. "We can't get a girlfriend, so we come onto Ponies. We know we're weird...." Zane and Nathan frowned.

Rarity smiled, feeling sorry for the poor boys. She put a hoof on Zane's shoulder. "Nonsense!" Rarity exclaimed. "You aren't weird. You're just.....Going about this the wrong way. I'm sure you can both find the Pony of your dreams right here in Ponyville!" The confidence Rarity had in Zane and Nathan made them smile.

"Who are your favorite Ponies?" Rarity asked.

"YOU." Nathan said, making Rarity cringe.

"Ummm......" Rarity said, not sure what to say. "That's....Very....Kind of you?" She smiled sarcastically. "What about yours, Zane?"

"Chrysalis." Zane said simply. Rarity's eyes bulged.

"The.....Queen of Changelings?" Rarity said quietly. Zane nodded. ".....Forget I said anything. Maybe you just....Need to change your attitude a bit."

"What do you mean?" Zane and Nathan said simultaneously.

"Do you....Always act all.....Pervy like this?" Rarity asked.

"Yup." Zane said, Nathan nodded. "Can't help it, just our nature."

"Well...." Rarity began. "Why don't you try to act more....Wholesome? Normal?"

"NORMAL......" Zane and Nathan stared in awe. "Cool word...." Zane said.

"Rarity. Wanna go on a date with me?" Nathan asked out of nowhere. "I'll act.....NORMAL. No funny business."

"Uuuuuhhhhhhh....." Rarity tried to think of an excuse to get out of this. "Oh! Look at the time! I must get back to work!" With that, Rarity started sewing once again.

"Tough luck, bro...." Zane said, putting a hoof on Nathan's shoulder.

"What are you talking about?" Nathan said, smirking. "That's not a no...."

Flight Training with Rainbow Dash.....

Rainbow Dash's last Nerve was being destroyed, Nova and Ze were making a bit of progress, but were still failing, non-the-less.

"Ugh..." Rainbow said, shaking her head at these goofs expense. "That's enough for today, guys.....We'll pick it up again, tomorrow...."

"Did Ze do good?" Ze asked, grinning.

"WHAT ABOUT ME?!" Nova asked. "DID I RAPE THAT SHIT?!"

"Ehhh...Coulda seen better..." Rainbow said, shrugging. "You're about....1.485.283.0283% awesome right now."

"Good enough for us!" Nova yelled, Ze nodded.

The General Store....

Freddie had decided to not only buy Tate a scooter, but to buy Damian one, and Kit a bike, since he was mature enough to handle one. He also decided to buy himself some hair gel, since...He didn't have any on him.

The scooters and bike matched the Boys hair color. Tate's scooter was blonde, Damian's scooter was black, and Kit's bike was brown. All in all, each Scooter cost 20 bits, the bike cost 30, and the hair Gel cost 2.

"Guess we should get to Sugarcube corner, see how Punk and your new girly friends are doing." Tate and Damian groaned, they didn't want to see THEM again.

"I'm sure to beat...Umm, Scootapoo in the race NOW!" Tate said, excited. "I've got the best scooter EVER!"

"Scooters are for little boys..." Kit said, smirking. "Bikes are for the big kids."

"Quit your bragging," Damian warned. "Before I run you over..." Kit gulped. His brother's weren't as smart as him, but he knew they were way more violent than him.

"I just can't believe the NERVE of that store owner..." Freddie said. "Telling me to grab the purple rooster on my head..." He scowled. The boys laughed.

"That was funny." Tate said. "You DO have a rooster on your head!"

Damian giggled. "Yeah! And you dyed it, too!"

Freddie smirked, he knew how to mess with his kids, as well. After all, he was pretty much a kid himself. He took a deep breath, and yelled. "WHO WANTS TWO FREE SCOOTERS?!?!" Many of the civilians started yelling, "ME! ME! I DO! I DO!" Horsepower came by, and only yelled "YEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! SCOOTERS ARE MANLY!!!!!!!!"

"SORRY, DAD!" Damian said, sweating. He didn't want to lose his scooter.

"YEAH!' Tate said. "We think your hair is.....AWESOME!!!" He really thought it looked gay and stupid, but he was the best liar out of the three.

Freddie smiled. "Good, keep it that way...." With that, they all went off to Sugarcube Corner to meet with their friends.

Sugarcube Corner....

"It's DOOOOONNNEE!" Pinkie Pie said sing-songingly.

"Oh yeah!" Scootaloo said, excited. "Bring out this bad boy!" Just then, Pinkie Pie, AND Marcus, because it was so big, brought out about a 4 foot tall Cupcake. Drenched in Peach, Strawberry, and Vanilla ice Cream, and coated with chocolate syrup, licorice, gum-drops, and cookies. Pinkie wanted to eat the whole thing by herself in one bite. But if she did that, 2 things would happen....1, her brain would be as cold as an icicle for an hour, and....It would go straight to her thighs....And then she'll blow up. (SpongeBob reference!)

"Holy mother of..." Punk said, looking at the walking carbs in awe.

"I'm gonna be as plump as a dang gum tick!" Apple Bloom exclaimed.

"Rarity would KILL me if she saw me eating all of this...." Sweetie Belle said, gaining an evil grin in the process. Scootaloo? Well, she just fainted from epicness.

"Here you guys go!" Pinkie said, smiling from ear to ear. "The first ever....CORNUCOPIA OF DUPE!" Pinkie pulled out her Party Cannon, and fired numerous amounts of confetti. "YAAAAAAY!!!!!"

"You'd better eat it ALL, too...." Marcus said. "That thing is a piece of CRAP to carry, even with HELP!"

"That's cuz you're a wimp..." Punk snickered. Marcus scowled.

And so, the CMC's and CM Punk ate their little hearts out. In a matter of time, every nook and cranny of this monstrosity of sugar was devoured. All 4 of these triumphant heroes had vanquished the evil beast, but they were showing the wounds of war...The all lay on the ground, burping excessively.

"How long did that take, Pinkie?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"42 Minutes!" Pinkie said excitedly, Marcus just shook his head in shock.

"I....Can't fell my...." Scootaloo burped. "....STOMACH...."

"If they puke, YOU'RE cleaning it up." Marcus said to Pinkie.

"Nuh uh, Marky." Pinkie disagreed. "I made that ENTIRE thing. You need to help your friends once in a While."

Marcus groaned, he REALLY hoped Ponies could hold their fats. "....Fine...." He finally said.

"You're the best Assistant EVER, Marky!" Pinkie said, hugging Marcus once again.

"My hoof is reaching for your tail..." Marcus said, Pinkie yelped in surprise.

"Oh ho ho..." Pinkie said, laughing. "You kidder!"

"I wasn't kidding..." Marcus said with a glare. Pinkie just smiled terrifiedly.

A few moments later, Freddie and his kids walked into Sugarcube Corner. They stared in awe at the carnage.

"....COOOOLLLLLLL!!!!!!" Damian and Tate said at the same Time.

"What happened, man?" Freddie asked to Punk in concern.

"Too.....Much.....Sugar.....Cardiac....ARREST!" Punk then grabbed Freddie's shirt, and whispered with a yell, "HEEELLPP...MEEEEEE!"

"They're fine!" Pinkie said reassuringly. "They just became the first Ponies, AND Human, to ever eat the biggest Item on Sugarcube Corner's menu...." She then pointed her hooves at Marcus. "Take it away, Marky!"

"Oh god....NO!" Marcus yelled, not wanting to cooperate.

"PLLLLEEAASSSEEE?" Pinkie said, bringing out her most dangerous Weapon....THE PINKIE EYES.

"Oh for the love of...." Marcus sighed. "FINE!" He then began to sing in an unenthusiastic voice

The Cornucopia of Dupe....

It's so delicious, it's so cute,

It'll make your belly rumble at sight,

And will make your taste buds filled with delight....

"YAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!" Pinkie applauded. "GO MARKY, GO MARKY! WHOOOO!" Marky just groaned.

"That was......GAY." Freddie said, snickering.

"Screw you!" Marcus yelled. "I think it's catchy...."

"We want a Cornucopia of Dupe, dad!" Tate yelled. "WE WANT IT, WE WANT IT,, WE WANT IT!"

"NO!" The CMC's and Punk yelled.

"Don't do it...." Apple Bloom groaned.

"It's BAAAADDD....." Punk said. "OOOOHHH so bad...."

"Does it not taste good?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, it's DELICIOUS!" Sweetie Belle said. "But, it makes your tummy hurt..."

"The pain will be Worth it!" Damian said. "PLEASE, dad?"

"It's 4 feet tall, Freddie." Marcus pointed out.

"WHAT THE?! HOW THE?!" Freddie said, not knowing what to say.

Pinkie shrugged. "Some people like to eat a WHOLE BUNCH!" She smiled.

"I don't know..." Freddie said.

"PLEASE, dad?" The boys said, giving their Dad Puppy eyes.

"Ponies are cuter when they do that...." Freddie said, crossing his arms and looking away, unimpressed. So then Pinkie Pie jumped in with her Pinkie Eyes.

"Son of a...." Freddie said, sighing.

38 Minutes later......

Oops, they did it again....

While The CMC's and Punk were starting to get the feeling in their tummies back, 4 new gladiators had slain the dreaded Dupe. Freddie, Kit, Tate and Damian were victorious, but the Dupe had left it's Mark.

"What'd we tell ya?" Punk said.

"We should've listened to you, dad..." Damian said.

"Nuh uh!" Tate said, belching. "THE RISK IS WORTH THE REWARD!"

"Oh, you poor fools..." Marcus said, laughing.

--------TO BE CONTINUED--------

The Scotland In You

It was a brand new day in Equestria. The first day was complete and utter chaos, there was a total of 5 casualties, which include some type of Bird, an Ursa Minor, and Ursa Major, J. Jonah Jameson, and Lens Flare. Ponies met Humans, some getting along lickity split, while it may take more time for others to get used to one another.

Pyro-Zi awoke to his automatic Alarm Clock. It was called the High Alarm. You know how you like to get up on a certain time almost every day? You set your alarm clock for the specific time, but sometimes, the Alarm clock never fully wakes you up? Well, Pyro-Zi solved that problem for himself. His ideal morning starts at 7:30. He is a morning alien. He scheduled the High Alarm to shock him at 7:30 every day, it only hurts a bit, enough for Pyro-Zi to wake up. And if he chose not to get up, and drifted back off into sleep, he would be shocked until he decided to get up. Before yesterday ended, Pyro-Zi attached a metal door to his Cave, this way, no one could get in without the password (Which is Zansux), and no one could possibly see him. Unlike some of his inventions being able to be destroyed by magic, NOTHING can destroy the metallic door. NOTHING.

Pyro-Zi yawned. "What a great day it is to hatch evil Schemes...." He said, smirking. He typed in the password on the door, and it opened up. The sun blinded Pyro-Zi, but he got over it in a span of seconds.

"I came up with NOTHING on how to take over Equestria last Night...." Pyro-Zi started to think, this is what he would be doing all day, after all. Surely he'd be able to think up something dastardly.

"But today....I shall think of something. Wait....No.....Bad idea!" Pyro-Zi screamed. "I should study what I am up against. First off, COMPUTER!" Once again, the Computer appeared in front of The Emperor.

"Yes, Emperor?" The computer asked.

"What are...The Elements of Harmony?" Pyro-Zi asked simply.

"Calculating data...." The computer replied, beeping and booping. "The Elements of Harmony: An ancient form of Magic used to defeat major threats of Equestria. There are 6 Elements, each assigned to a Pony that fits the total description of said element."

Pyro-Zi laughed, unimpressed. "Only 6? I killed an Ursa Major yesterday! From what I studied....It is nearly impossible to kill one of THOSE with a form of Magic. Nontheless, I will not underestimate.....What are the 6 elements?"

"The six Elements of Harmony, are Generosity, Loyalty, Laughter, Kindness, Honesty, and of course, Magic."

"All admirable character traits." Pyro-Zi said. "Well, except Magic. Since it's not even relevant on Planet Onceria. But here, Magic is possible, so I guess you could say, yes, those are all 6 admirable character Traits." Pyro-Zi jotted down some notes inside his mind. "Before I think up a plan on how to destroy Equestria, I must study each Element of Harmony......But, who first?" He thought about it, then figured out, did it really MATTER which one he did first? They would all die anyway.

"Wait..." Pyro-Zi gasped. "Why should I study them one at a Time....When I can study them all at the SAME TIME! Computer, scan me, connect me up to the Dollatron, and make 5 more of me..." Pyro-Zi smirked, he would clone himself.

"Yes, Emperor." The computer cooperated. It then shot out a non-harmful laser, which scanned Pyro-Zi's body from top to bottom. After it was done, it would connect to the Dollatron, the machine Pyro-Zi used to clone things. A few moments later, the machine started rumbling, and then a few more minutes Later, five more Pyro-Zi's popped out.

"Excellent..." All 6 Pyro-Zi's said simultaneously, smirking. Now, I know what you are thinking. The other 5 Pyro-Zi's are clones, but they are what is known as Unicellular Clones, they have all the same Traits as the original Pyro-Zi, and they contain all of the knowledge as the Original Pyro-Zi, as well. It's basically like Pyro-Zi has complete control of the other clones, even when he doesn't.

"Let us move out!" The original Pyro-Zi said, the other 5 nodded, and cloaked, turning invisible so as to not be seen.

"Computer..." The original Pyro-Zi said. "Give us 6 copies of where the Elements of Harmony are located."

"Would you like them to be ever-changing, Emperor?"

"Oh, yes! Of course." Pyro-Zi replied. Ever-changing meant that the map would refresh the location of an Element everytime they went somewhere different, even if they moved an inch, the Pyro-Zi's would know where they were.

"That is all for now, Computer..." Pyro-Zi said, and the computer shut itself off. Now the Pyro-Zi's were ready to begin Step 1. They were to study the Element of Harmony they were assigned by the Original Pyro-Zi, create Mental Notes about ANYTHING that would be important. Also, as to not be confused, Pyro-Zi gave them code names. PZ-1, PZ-2, PZ-3, PZ-4, and PZ-5.

Sweet Apple Acres...

Kit was the first to wake up out of him, his brothers, his father, and CM Punk. He, along with his brothers, were not very optimistic about sleeping on Hay Bails, so Freddie tried to make them as comfortable as possible, he added blankets on top of the hay bales, REALLY soft blankets they were. Kit had a good night's sleep, he wondered if his brother's did. He decided to wake them up, after all, they would have to leave for School soon.

"Tate, Damian?" Kit said, nudging his brother's with his hooves. They all slept about 5 inches from eachother, so he barely had to move. Damian was the first to wake up.

"Huh? Oh.....Hey, man..." Damian said, stirring. "What time is it?"

Kit had to trot over to Freddie and read his watch. "7:36, school will be starting soon."

"That's right." Damian said. "We need to wake up numbskull, here." He gestured towards Tate.

Kit nodded, and started shaking Tate.

"Uhhhhh, you're gonna LOSE! I'm gonna make chicken nuggets out of you!" Tate exclaimed, having a dream.

"What a loser..." Damian said, Kit chuckled. "Let me try...." Damian then slapped Tate across the face, that jolted him from sleep, for sure!

"WHAT- DID I WIN!??!" Tate said all too quickly.

"Oh yeah..." Damian said, grinning. "You won first Place, for World's stupidest brother!"

"I did?" Tate said, smiling widely. "Heck yeah! I bet Scootaloo's never won that!"

"That's because she isn't a Boy...." Kit pointed out.

"WHAT?!" Tate exclaimed, sincerely shocked. "SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE'S A BOY!"

"You're just saying that to put out the fact that you LIKE heeerrrr." Damian teased.

"I do NOT!" Tate said, crossing his arms.

"You like Scootaloo, Scootaloo is cute to you!" Damian and Kit chanted, teasing Tate.

"You both sound like TOTAL girls." Tate said, smirking. This made Damian and Kit stop automatically.

"What are you three yammering about?" Freddie said, waking up, he then checked his watch, and IMMEDIATELY screamed. "7:38!?!?!?? WHAT AM I? A MORNING PERSON!??!"

"Sorry, dad." Kit said apologetically. "But you need to walk us to School, remember?"

"OH CRAP!" Freddie yelled, now waking up Punk.

"Hey, Pointy-Head...." Punk started. "SHUT YOUR COCKA-DOODLE." Freddie just glared at Punk.

"Dude, can I borrow your ATV?" Freddie asked Punk. Freddie had bought Punk a top of the line ATV yesterday, it only cost 20 bits, causing Freddie to wonder why EVERYTHING is so cheap here.

"What for?" Punk asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I gotta take these guys to school." Freddie explained. "And on foot, they'll be late. The ATV will get us there in no time. It goes up to 110 miles per Hour."

Punk groaned. "Fine....But that's MY ATV. You damage it, you gotta by me another One!"

"Got it." Freddie said, nodding. "Lets go, boys." Freddie attached a Wheelbarrow to the ATV, and rushed his kids inside of it. And then he was off, he was out of Punk's sight within 10 seconds. That's how fast that thing was!

"DAMN...." Was all Punk could say. He hadn't been able to try out his new Toy yet, but as soon as Freddie got back, he would be punching him square in the face, and taking his baby for a Ride.

A few Moments later.....

All of the Ponies rushes out of the way as Freddie came driving through on the ATV. Some yelled at the Purple haired stallion for being so careless of their own safety, but where the hell else was Freddie supposed to drive?

"Sorry, everyone!" Freddie yelled. "Just driving my kid's to school!" This wasn't Canterlot, though. Some ponies were a bit uncomfortable with Freddie doing this, but most smiled and enjoyed the presence of the Human turned Pony. But none more than Horsepower, he was running alongside the ATV (How the fuck is he that Fast?!) And screaming "YEEEAAAAHHH!!!!!" the whole Time.

Kit, Damian, and Tate were having a hell of a time, too. They would have to be driven to school like this EVERY day. It was basically, arriving in Style.

A few minutes later, Freddie was in sight of the school, he slowed down his unbelievable speed of 110 Miles per Hour, and quickly went down to 20. He didn't want to fuck up and somehow drive the ATV through the wall of the School, that may take the rest of his Bits to pay.

"Here we are, guys..." Freddie said, smiling. He gave his son 3 bits each for lunch. "I'll be back here at 3:00 to pick you up." The boys nodded. "Have fun, later!" Freddie said before riding off.

The boys braced themselves for what was about to happen. Everypony in town already knew who they were, would the fillies and Colts look at them differently since they were from a different Dimension? They got their answer, as they entered class about 10 seconds before the bell Rang.

All of their classmates looked at them. They wouldn't smile, nor frown, just stare. Like they were a fabulous painting in a Museum, only the boys didn't exactly FEEL fabulous right now.

Then, suddenly, in the blink of an Eye, every single soul in the classroom smiled. This not only shocked the boys, they did not expect the sudden Outburst of happiness, but it also made the boys feel LOADS better.

"Howdy, guys!" Apple Bloom said. The boys waved back at Apple Bloom.

"Well, you must be the Hediger's!" Ms. Cheerilee said, smiling Cheerily, just like her name implied. "It is just wonderful to have you here at Ponyville Elementary!"

Kit and Damian were happy already, but Tate? He just HAD to go there.....

"You've got something in your teeth." Tate said nonchalantly. Ms. Cheerilee gasped, and pulled out her mirror. When she saw that nothing was gauged in her teeth, she laughed. "Oh ho.....You boys are kidders, huh?" Tate nodded, happy now.

"Well," Ms. Cheerilee said. "Why not tell us a little about yourselves?"

-------TO BE CONTINUED------

Go Away, Bad Dream

The class was eager to hear what the new kids would say about themselves. Damian, Kit and Tate had to think of something quick, they didn't want to disappoint their classmates.

"Well, I'm Kit." Kit started, gesturing towards himself. "I'm the smartest out of the three of us....And the most mature.....And the friendliest.....And the least likely to burn this school down to the ground....And the funniest....And-"

"Yeah, yeah, we get it..." Damian said, thrusting a hoof on his brother's mouth. "Well, I'm Damian, and I'm the COOLEST, as you can probably tell." He flashed his class a smirk. "I HATE girls, so none of you fillies better even think about hangin' with me, you ain't cool enough!" That comment earned him glares from almost all of the Girls, except Sweetie Belle, who admired his boldness.

"Now, now, Damian..." Ms. Cheerilee retorted. "There's no need to make fun of the little fillies."

"Whatever," Damian replied. "They all just better leave me alone, I don't want their cooties...."

"Damian...." Ms. Cheerilee said, glaring. "Cooties are non-existent."

"We'll see when I don't come in for a week after getting touched." Damian retorted. "That's it, I'm done." Now it was Tate's turn. What could he say about himself that his classmates could remember him by? He only had one statement in mind....

"I'm Tate!" Tate said, cheerfully. "And ummm.....Scootaloo's a chicken!" His brothers facepalmed, and I did, too....Scootaloo just crossed her arms and sighed.

Ms. Cheerilee giggled. "That won't do, Tate. You need to tell us about YOURSELF."

"Oh...." Tate replied, nervous now. What would he say?! He started to sweat, he wasn't nervous, he just didn't know how to make a first impression. "Ummmm.....Ummmmmm" He was at a constant war with his thoughts, trying to make himself look like an interesting colt. He finally blurted out, "I LIKE FROZEN YOGURT!!!!"

"Yes!" Blurted out a young Fred Fredburger. "I like Frozen Yogurt, yes."

"And....And.....AND NACHOS!!!!!" Tate screamed.

"Yes!" Fred replied. "I like Frozen Yogurt and Nachos, yes."

"Well....Ummmm.....That's very nice, Tate..." Ms. Cheerilee smiled awkwardly. "And yes, Fred....We already knew..."

"I WANNA SIT BY HIM!" Tate said, gesturing to Fred.

"Yes." Fred replied. "Sit by me, sit by me, yes."

"Actually, when I found out you three would by joining our class, I took the liberty of creating a NEW Seating chart!" Some students groaned, others cheered in Delight. This was the Cutie Mark Crusader's chance to all sit by eachother. And if they were lucky, Damian, Kit and Tate would be by them, as well.

Diamond Tiara smirked. "I hope those cuties get to sit by ME." She thought.

Diamond Tiara got a quarter of her wish, at least. Kit was sitting in front of her, Damian was in between Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo was sitting behind Tate, and sitting next to Tate, was Fred Fredburger.

"Hi." Fred said, gretting Tate. "I'm Fred Fredburger. I can spell my name REAL GOOD." Fred then began to spell out his name, like he did every other damn day...."F-r-e-d- F-r-e-d-b-u-r-..." He then took a pause. "G-e-r....FRED FREDBURGER, yes."

"WHOA." Tate said, obviously impressed. "I can barely do that.....T-a-t-e-H-e-a-d-i-g-g-e-r-e!" Scootaloo snickered at the airhead's inability to spell his own name.

"You can't even spell your own Name, and you think you can beat ME in a Race?!" Scootaloo teased, laughing her ass off.

"HEY!" Tate retorted. "I thought we were chicken buddies!"

"We are." Scootaloo replied. "But I'm obviously the smarter Chicken here."

"Nuh uh." Tate said, crossing his arms.

"We'll see what Fred thinks." Scootaloo smirked. "Fred."

"Yes?" Fred asked.

"Who do you think is the smarter chicken?" Scootaloo replied. "Me? Or Tate?"

Fred rubbed his jaw with his index finger. This was definitely the hardest question he had ever been asked, but after a while, Fred had figured out the only Logical answer. "ME!" Fred said with confidence. "Fred Fredburger is smartest chicken."

"Ummm....That wasn't an option." Tate said with a WTF look on his face.

"Yes. Fred Fredburger chicken, yes." Fred said, ignoring the blank looks he was getting. "FRED FREDBURGER, FRED FREDBURGER, FRED FREDBURGER, FRED FREDBURGER, FRED FREDBURGER."

He continued to say his name over and over while Tate and Scootaloo talked. "Is he always like this?" Tate asked.

"He's usually much, MUCH worse." Scootaloo replied, and then they both laughed.

"Yes. Fred Fredburger is funny, yes." Fred said, happy with his ability to make people laugh.

"Hi, Damian...." Sweetie Belle said with a loveful look in her eyes.

"What up, Sweaty Balls?" Damian said with a smirk.

"You can call me WHATEVER you want....." Sweetie Belle said, resting her head on her hooves in delight.

"Alright..." Damian replied. "How about FREAK? Seriously, girl, you need to calm down."

Sweetie Belle sighed with happiness. "...FREAK.....I LOVE IT...." Damian looked at Apple Bloom, and she just shrugged.

"What's up with her?" Damian whispered to Apple Bloom.

Apple Bloom smiled. "Ah think she like ya." She answered honestly. Immediately, thoughts of Damian's manhood were erased. His right eye started twitching, and he felt his stomach doing turns. He got up and asked Ms. Cheerilee, "Can I go to the bathroom?! PLEASE?"

"Why, Damian?" Ms. Cheerilee asked curiously.

"I feel sick...." Damian answered.

"Oh my...." Ms. Cheerilee gasped. "Alright." Damian quickly rushed out of the room, and ran down the hallway. He had NO IDEA where the Bathroom was, but he would find it regardless, he HAD too. Either he had to jack off, or he had to throw up....I'll go with the first One, though. No reason.

Kit was nervous, he had to sit in front of Diamond Tiara, the CMC's had warned him and his Brother's about her. He figured she was just another spoiled brat because her father had enough money to buy this School. He soon learned, though, that maybe the CMC's were wrong about her. As soon as he sat down in his new seat, Diamond Tiara wasted no time in starting up a conversation.

"Hi, there!" Diamond Tiara said, lots of happiness in her voice. "You're Kit, right?" She smiled.

"Yeah, that's me." Kit replied.

"How do you like Ponyville so far?" She asked.

"It's nice. Everyone seems nice." Kit replied. "Except Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo told me that you AREN'T very nice. What's that about?" He had to figure out what was so bad about Diamond Tiara.

Diamond Tiara laughed. "Oh....Don't listen to those three!" She said. "They're all just jealous that I'VE got my Cutie Mark, and THEY don't!"

"Oh...." Kit said, not finished with his interrogation yet. "But, your dad's rich, isn't He?"

Diamond Tiara nodded. "But what does that have to do with anything? Not ALL rich people are Canterlot snobs. Like your dad....My daddy gave your daddy 10,000 bits yesterday! How generous was that?" "She does have a point...." Kit thought.

"And I'm sure your daddy was even RICHER on Earth. Right?"

"That's correct."

"And he's not a snob, is he?"

"Well....No, but-"

"But what? You and your brothers don't seem like snobs either."

"But, the Tiara on your head? You look a bit show offish with it on."

"My daddy's rich, remember? He bought it for me. And the least I can thank him is by wearing it all day. Is there anything snobbish about that?"

"Well, no.....But what if you're just playing me?"

"Why would I do that? I'm just trying to strike up a conversation with a possible...New FRIEND."

"You-You wanna be my Friend?" Kit couldn't believe it. It happened so fast, it was almost too much to handle. Maybe the CMC's were wrong....

"Of course! I'm friends with everyone in this class! Except those Cutie Mark Crusaders.....They seem to think I'm just a brat. But I'm not!"

"I guess you're right...."

"You know....You shouldn't hang around with liars. I sure don't....That's why those three never get my time of Day. And you shouldn't give them your time of day, either."

"But, they seem nice, too..."

"Oh, yeah. They look all innocent and sweet, but in reality, the Cutie Mark Crusaders are just playing us all. Trust me....I've dealt with them before."

"What should I do to avoid them? Since they're so bad?"

Diamond Tiara smirked. Her plan was working to PERFECTION. "Stick with me....You, and your brothers deserve the BEST of friends. And that's me."

"I guess you're right. But, if you are messing with us, I WILL find out."

"Fair enough.....So, friends?" Diamond Tiara extended her hoof. Kit thought about it, but did he really have anything to lose? It seemed like the CMC's were jealous of everything that Diamond obtained. Her money, her Cutie Mark, and apparently, her kindness.

Kit smiled. "Deal...." With that, he shook Diamond's hoof, and that was that. Kit was friends with the Sinister Snob, too bad he didn't know of her true intentions.

"You tell your brothers what I told you, steer clear of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and you'll be in the clear."

Kit nodded. "This is awesome!" He thought. "Me and my brothers have just gotten ourselves a strong Ally."


Twilight's Library.....

A few Hours later....

Spike awoke from his sleep, the sound of giggling and chuckling surrounded him. He had no doubt it was the instant friendship of Austin Ross and his own best friend, Twilight Sparkle, developing even more. He was right.

"Where are you guys going?" Spike quickly said.

"Austin is taking me out to lunch." Twilight answered smiling, Spike's heart ripped open another inch. "We heard about that new desert at Sugarcube Corner, the Cornucopia of Dupe, and we wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

"We'll be back soon, Spike." Austin said, before Spike could intertwine, though, they were both gone in a jiffy. Spike was pissed, they didn't even give him an offer to go....He could definitely help them eat all of That! Now he was certain, Austin was trying to erase Twilight from his life, completely. Spike was about to go do something about it, but then he remembered that Twilight would just turn into her mad self if he tried to interfere with her personal life. Spike just sighed, and decided, since he had nothing else to do, to go back to bed....

A few Minutes later.....

Twilight and Austin arrived at Sugarcube Corner, and the first thing they noticed, was Marcus Sims.....In his hilarious Pink apron, the same pissed off, expressionless face he had since he had arrived in Ponyville.

Austin snickered. "What's up, Man?" He asked Marcus.

Pinkie nudged Marcus in his ribcage, as if that was his cue.

Marcus sighed. "Welcome to Sugarcube Corner...." He said in a very bored way. "How can I make you smiley wiley?"

Austin and Twilight laughed uproariously. Pinkie wondered why they were laughing so hard, she didn't notice anything funny.

"What's so funny, guys?" Pinkie asked curiously. "All Marcus did was say his lines!"

"What lines?" Twilight asked, though she probably shouldn't have....

"The lines the script says he has so say!" Pinkie said, as if it were so obvious. "Duh, silly filly!"

Austin and Twilight shared the same look, the look of "The fuck is she talking about?"

"She's breaking the fourth wall, you morons...." Marcus replied, snarling.

"How do you know?" Austin asked.

"I had to spend an ENTIRE NIGHT with her...." Marcus explained roughly. "All she kept talking about was the FUCKING script! WELL I DON'T SEE A SCRIPT!!!!!!"

"You don't see it..." Pinkie started. "Because you CAN'T see it.....OOOHHHHHH...."

"Plus," Marcus continued. "She keeps being all cryptic and shit....It's annoying as hell...."

Twilight smiled. "That's Pinkie Pie."

Marcus sighed. "So, you guys wanna try the Cornucopia of Dupe?" He asked.

"Yeah. We think we can handle it." Austin answered, this made Marcus smirk.

"Oh?" Marcus called him out. "You're dead wrong, then....."

"He's right." Pinkie said, nodding. "That thing will make your tummy do somersaults!"

"We'll take it!" Austin and Twilight said simultaneously.

They had to wait a bit, and while they waited, they got a bit more "Acquainted" with eachother.

"I just can't believe what I've been hearing..." Twilight said. "Earth sounds like such a great place one minute, and then the next....It sounds like a place fit for law-breakers."

"It's a reoccurring cycle." Austin replied.

"Well...Non-the-less..." Twilight continued. "If I would of had ANYONE to tell me about Earth, I'm glad it was you...." She smiled.

"I'm glad to tell you all you wanted to know." Austin said, smiling back. "Anything else I can do for you?"

"Welllll..." Twilight replied. "I'm doing some research...."

"Research on what?" Austin asked curiously.

"Research...On the Human Anatomy...." Twilight said, smirking seductively.

Austin raised an eyebrow, but he still had his smile going. "And....You want me to help you with your research?"

"Oh yes." Twilight said, nodding. "You'll be.....The test Subject...." Twilight and Austin lunged for eachother at the same Time. Their lips locked in a passionate kiss. Austin used his strength to place Twilight on his lap, giving them both a more direct angle with eachother.

"So...." Austin said, breathing heavily. "Is this why you went all nuts when you heard the word Human?"

"You sure are smart...." Twilight said lustfully. "I was looking you and all of your friends up and down.....Even Freddie's kids....But none of them stood out more than you, Austin...I knew, that you would be the one to help me fulfill my studies."

"We haven't fulfilled ANYTHING yet." Austin replied, smirking. "This is just kissing....We haven't even reached the full wonders of my Fulfillment."

"I guess we shall start the OFFICIAL research then...." Twilight suggested. Austin nodded. "Forget that Cupcake, THIS, is the REAL dessert..."

"NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" Spike screamed as he woke up from his Nightmare. His whole body was sweating.

"Oh...." Spike said, coming back. "It was...Just a dream...Oh man...." He then realized that his nightmare could be turning into reality as he spoke. "I HAVE to stop this! That JERK isn't going to take Twilight away from me!" Spike got out of his basket, and ran out of the door, as quick as he could. He would NOT allow this to happen. He would be getting his best friend back....

One way....Or another...

-----TO BE CONTINUED-----

A Friend in Need

Spike ran, and ran, and ran, and ran, and he would not stop running until he got to his destination. Austin Ross had obviously came from Earth to steal his best friend, otherwise he wouldn't have gotten used to her right away. This was his game-plan all along, and Spike would make sure his plan blew up in his face.

It took a little less than a minute for Spike to get to Sugarcube Corner, he looked through the window, and he saw Austin and Twilight, just about to enjoy their first bite of the Cournucopia of Dupe. What if Austin poisoned the giant Cupcake when Twilight wasn't looking? Maybe Austin didn't came here to make friends, maybe he came her to KILL his friends! It all made sense, why would he become so friendly with her so quickly? Spike had to stop this! He would not allow his best friend to be poisoned!

Spike burst through the door, and immediately lunged at Austin. "NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" Spike screamed, obviously in the heat of the moment.

"Hey, Spike, what's up, ma-" Austin tried to say, but he was interrupted by Spike jumping on his shoulders, and ramming his head into the giant Cupcake. Spike then started to slap Austin repeatedly in the back of his head.

"SPIKE!" Twilight screamed, using her magic to levitate Spike off of Austin, and onto the ground.

"Good job, Spike!" Pinkie said gleefully. "I KNEW that was the right way to eat!" Pinkie then preceded to dunk her own head into another cake, within seconds, it was all inside her stomach.

"I wasn't showing him how to eat right..." Spike said, clenching his fists. "I was showing him that he isn't welcome around here!"

"What are you talking about, Spike?!" Twilight said, anger all around her tone.

"He's trying to steal you away from me!" Spike screamed. "Ever since he got here, you've spent nothing but time with HIM!"

Austin wasn't mad, nor surprised. He knew Spike's jealousy would eventually cause the little dragon to take immediate action. He knew what it was like to lose friends, and that's not the type of thing he'd do to anybody himself.

"Spike...." Austin said, sighing. "Twilight just wants to know about my Dimension. She's curious, and I'm curious to know about where she's from. I'm not trying to steal her from you....I've lost friends myself before, and I NEVER want to put anybody from that type of pain...."

"You LIAR!" Spike yelled, how could he trust this guy? He had just got here yesterday.

"Spike...He's telling the truth." Twilight retorted. "You KNOW I like to read a lot, and I can hardly find ANYTHING about Humans or Earth in my books. So when someone from the direct source shows up, it's pretty self explanatory that I will talk to them, so I can learn all I can. That's why I invited him to stay at the Library with us, so we could talk on a regular basis."

"Then....Why are you two out on a DATE?!" Spike asked.

Austin and Twilight laughed.

"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?!" Spike asked, a demanding tone in his voice.

"Spike....I have a wife...." Austin answered. "This is just a friendly get-together."

Twilight nodded. "That's right. Plus, we want to see if we can eat all of this by ourselves."

Spike chuckled. If Twilight could get along with him, than so could he. "Looks like Austin already has a bit of it on his face...." He then chuckled nervously. "Sorry about that...."

"It's no problem." Austin replied, smiling genuinely. "I figured this would happen, so, as to show that there are no hard feelings....I'd like to invite you, to help us break a record."

Spike's eyes widened. "You mean...."

Austin nodded. "Will you help us eat all of this crap?"

"Oh yeah, I will!"

"Have a seat then, Spike!" Twilight said, scooting over. "Let's make History." Spike and Austin nodded, and then all three began to dig in.

"Aaaawwww...." Pinkie Pie said, tears forming more and more after each second. "Isn't friendship a beautiful Thing, Marky?" She then rested one of her hooves on Marcus' shoulders.

"Uhhhh.......No...." Marcus answered plainly, he then noticed the hoof on his shoulder. "Get your hoof off my shoulder, before I BREAK it." Pinkie wasn't stupid, though. She realized that Marcus just fucked up.

"Hooves aren't BONES, silly!" Pinkie said, teasing Marcus. Marcus realized his mistake, and rammed his head into the cash Register. "Also....You threaten me again, and I'll call Ryback!"

"SORRY, I DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE." Marcus said, putting his hooves up in Surrender. Pinkie smirked. Marcus was SO fun to mess with.


Ponyville Elementary.....

It was now Gym time at Ponyville Elementary, the boys were excited to see what types of games Ponies played.

"I hope people here play Chess!" Kit said, excited. He was the smartest, so he obviously liked games that involved strategy.

Tate and Damian laughed at their brainiac brother. "I hope they play Basketball!" Damian said, he being the most Athletic.

"I hope they play Duck, Duck, Goose!" Tate said with a grin, obviously still stuck in Kindergarten. Damian and Kit just looked at their brother oddly, they were used to this, after all.

"So, why'd you have to go to the Bathroom, Damian?" Kit asked.

"Can you....Keep a secret?" Damian asked.

"From who?" Kit replied.

All Damian needed to do was nod his head in the Direction of Tate, who was running around like an Autistic child.

"Of course...." Kit said, rolling his eyes. "What is it?"

"I'm pretty sure Sweaty Balls likes me...." Damian said in a whisper.

"You mean Sweetie Belle?" Kit retorted, correcting his brother.

"That's her name?!" Damian said, shocked he had been wrong all along. "Girly name...." He said, scowling.

"She likes you?" Kit asked, not sure if his ears were deceiving him.

"Yeah, man! Look at her over there!" Damian said, gesturing over to Sweetie Belle, who was just staring at her lover with that same smile on her face.

Kit laughed. "Poor girl...."

Damian punched his brother in the shoulder. "Shut up! Just don't tell Tate, he'll have a FIELD DAY with me."

"Punch me again and I will...." Kit warned, Damian gulped and backed off. "Good...."

"Hey, guys!" Apple Bloom called, waving from where she sat. "Come sit with us!" Damian and Tate did as they were asked, even though they didn't want to. Kit was FAR harder to convince, though.

He walked right up to the CMC's, and boldly revealed where his loyalty lied. "I do not wish to sit with the Jealous type." Kit said, shocking the CMC's, and even his brothers.

"What are ya talkin' about?" Apple Bloom asked the question everyone else was asking in their head.

"I'll leave it at that..." Kit said, not wanting to get in an argument. "Come on, guys. Let's go sit with our more MATURE friend."

"Fred?" Tate asked hopefully. He had gotten along well with the Elephant pretty quickly, after all.

"No...." Kit said, facehoofing. "Diamond Tiara." The CMC's immediately gasped. It seems as though Kit had not listened to their warning."

"We told you to stay away from her...." Scootaloo said.

"Yes, you did." Kit replied. "But you said it so that I couldn't have friends that WEREN'T jealous of anyone."

"We ain't jealous of Diamond Tiara! She's just EVIL!" Apple Bloom explained, but Kit wasn't listening.

"Come on, guys. Lets leave the jealous alone." Kit said, trying to get his brothers away before the jealous Rubbed off on them.

"Nah." Damian said, smirking. "These girls said she was evil, so I agree." Kit was in shock, he was the Leader! If he wasn't around, his brothers would surely be in Juvy by now!

"Fine!" Kit yelled. "Tate?"

"Let's ask Fred...." Tate suggested, Kit immediately sighed. "Fred, is Diamond Tiara nice?"

"Well, one time I asked her to get me some Nachos....And she didn't get them." Fred said, remembering it like it was yesterday....Because it WAS. "So....No. Diamond Tiara not nice, no."

"You guys should just give her a chance....Like I am willing to." With that, Kit walked off.

"What's HIS problem?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"He's just being dumb." Tate answered.

"I was asking Damian...." Sweetie Belle said, glaring at Tate. Tate immediately felt chills run down his spine. "Go ahead, Damian...." She said, smiling once again.

Damian had a look of perplexity on his face, but decided to go along with it. "He's just being dumb." He answered. Sweetie Belle immediately sighed with happiness, happy to once again hear her Lover's voice.

"You always know just the right thing to say..." Sweetie Belle replied. "Why couldn't YOU say that?" She asked Tate.

"I did...." Tate said, wondering if this girl stole his brain while he was wasn't looking.

"LIAR." Sweetie Belle said, crossing her arms. Damian, Tate and the CMC's just exchanged odd looks.

"Hi, Kit!" Diamond Tiara said, greeting her new "Friend". "Where are your brothers?"

"They listened to the jealous type...." Kit answered, obviously upset. "They think you're evil, for some reason...." Diamond Tiara mentally growled, she needed all THREE of the boys for her plan to work!

"Don't worry...." Diamond said, smiling. "They'll learn to listen to me soon enough."

"You sure?" Kit asked, curious how she could convince his brothers.

Diamond Tiara smirked evilly, even though it was visible to Kit, he didn't seem to notice it. "I'm MORE than sure...."

------TO BE CONTINUED-------

P.S.: If you're wondering where Silver Spoon, she moved away. Don't need that bitch in this story.

Let the Spying Commence!

Since both Twilight and Pinkie Pie were both at the same place at the same time, there were 2 Pyro-Zi's nearby. The Original Pyro-Zi was to spy on Twilight, because she was the most important Element, just like Pyro-Zi was the most important Pyro-Zi out of all Pyro-Zi's. PZ-1 was to monitor Pinkie Pie, which was pretty easy, because her character traits just OOZED off of her.

"Identification: Pinkie Pie." PZ-1 thought, taking strict mental notes. "Her element, is Laughter, and her traits show. She seems to be happy all through the day, threats do not Phase her, she eats like....Well, like a Horse, likes to bake, and seems to be over-friendly with everyone around her. She should be the easiest to make crack, her qualities match that of, well....A serial killer....Though she probably isn't one, I will DRIVE her to kill." PZ-1 smirked.

"Identification: Twilight Sparkle." Pyro-Zi said, making his own mental notes. "Her element, is Magic, the most important Element of all. She thoroughly enjoys reading, and even LIVES in a Library, her accomplice's name is Spike, but he does not matter. Seems to be a peacemaker of sorts, and even chooses to raise her voice at times. It could be said that she has a short temper, but that can not be confirmed as of yet."

As they were finishing up their mental notes, Twilight, Austin, and Spike had given up on the Cornucopia of Dupe, it was just too much for only three People to handle. Pinkie frowned, as she wrote in the names of the three on the official Dupe Bulletin. The Dupe Bulletin was a roll call of sorts, Pinkie came up with the idea last night. It showed the names of everyone who ate the cake, including who held the record for fastest amount of eating the Cake, which The CMC's and CM Punk held the record for, and least number of people, which was still tied at four. But those who failed the Cornucopia Challenge, which it was being coined now, were still recognized, just not as Losers. Instead, they were regarded as those who....Bit off more than They could Chew.....BAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAA!!!!! HOLY SHIT, I'M CRYING, I'M CRYING! That is freaking AWESOME!

CM Punk had shown up at the best Time. He witnessed most of the Challenge, including the failure. He smirked as he still was one of the Champions for longest Time. "Valiant effort, guys....But I, am still on top!" Punk said victoriously.

Austin belched. "Shut up, Phil....."

"Just one quick question..." Punk said. ".....Does it Hurt?"

"It feels like a full grown Dragon is burning my intestines...." Spike said, coughing.

"Not THAT." Punk said, sighing. "Does it hurt to know, that you FAILED the Cornucopia Challenge?" He smirked.

"When I get back up....You are SO dead...." Austin warned, Punk didn't seem worried, though. He should have been, though, because instantly, Twilight's horn lit up. She was using her magic to ease the Pain all the way off. Punk gulped, as he knew what was in store for Him next.

"There." Twilight said, smiling. "The pain is now null and void!"

"Alright, Twilight!" Spike said, cheering on for his Magical friend.

"That's better...." Austin said, as he got up and started to walk towards Punk.

"Hey, come on, man..." Punk said, trying to reason with Austin. "I-I was just kidding about all of that crap, You ate that thing the best you Could! It just wasn't enough! Don't be a sore loser like Marcus over there would be...." Marcus was pissed because he had no fingers to flip Punk off with, so he just settled for growling.

Suddenly, Austin perked up, realizing he was acting far too childish for his own good. "You're right...." He said, patting Punk on the back. "No hard feelings....But KNOW this, I WILL be Champion of the Cornucopia one day....You'll see...."

"Oh yeah, your victory is as good as Golden....." Punk nodded. "If you have two Ryback's." The two then laughed.

"You know, you two seem awfully happy...." Twilight said, wondering about their true feelings. "I mean, you're both trapped in a Dimension with seemingly no way out. You have loved ones where you're from that Don't even know where you are....Don't you feel upset?"

"They'd better damn well be upset!" Pyro-Zi thought to himself. "I want these humans to PAY for what they've put me through...." He then smirked. "....And they WILL....."

"Of course we're upset." Austin answered. "But what will moping around here do for us?"

"That's right...." Punk added to the answer. "And if we're unhappy, it just ricochets off of us, and onto all of you. We don't want to worry your moods...."

"That's the spirit!" Pinkie said gleefully. "Nothing makes you more happy when you're sad than PONYVILLE!" She then turned to Marcus, wanting to know how he felt about this. He wouldn't tell her ANYTHING about himself last Night, it's almost like he didn't trust Her...."How do you feel about all of this, Marky?"

"Pissed off....." Marcus said, the same scowl as always on his face. "I'm stuck here with colorful ponies....I keep telling myself I'm either in a coma, or just high on Free-On, but it just seems like....This is all real....."

"That's because it IS, silly!" Pinkie replied.

"Yeah, I've pretty much figured it out by now..." Marcus said, looking at the ground. "I wanna go home...." Just then, something unbelievable, something out of this World occurred.....A tear rolled down Marcus Sims face. It's not like it couldn't be seen, after all, it hit the floor. Everyone around that location was in shock, Marcus didn't seem like the type to cry a lot, and he wasn't, he was usually strong, but this World had struck something in him that hadn't been struck in a while. Even Pyro-Zi and PZ-1 were in shock.

"About time..." Pyro-Zi thought. "Finally, I see tears....." Marcus' tears were the first tears he had seen while he was here. The Ursa Minor, Ursa Major, that mutated Bird, nor even Officer Jameson or Lens Flare had cried. Pyro-Zi was a bit upset, though. HE wanted to be the one to make people cry! Not their longing to get back home!

Marcus then continued his heart-felt speech. "It's nothing against you Ponies, you all seem very nice and helpful. Except you ARE quite annoying Pinkie, no offense."

"None taken..." Pinkie said, but not with happiness in her voice, all she had was that hint of shock everyone else had.

"It's nothing against any of you, it's Just......I don't.....Like....Ponies....."

"We know." Twilight replied. "But....Why don't you like Ponies?"

"I......" Marcus started choking up. "I can't tell you......"

"Please, Marcus.....Tell us...." Pinkie said, actually calling Marcus by his real name, PZ-1 took IMMEDIATE notice of this, it seemed like something he might want to remember....

"Note to self...." PZ-1 said to himself. "It seems that Pinkie Pie calls Marcus by his actual name when she is sad......Hopefully Marcus keeps up the sap Story. If he does so, I can learn more about the depressed Side of her..."

"I can't....." Marcus replied. "It's....Too personal....."

"If you're gonna be here for awhile...." Twilight started. "You NEED to learn to rust those around you.....What? You think we're going to use your deep dark Secrets against you?!" Twilight started to raise her voice, which surprised Marcus, but in Twilight's opinion, it was necessary, ANYTHING to get Marcus to tell his story...

"It's not that..." Marcus replied. "I.....Just don't trust you.....Not after what your Species has done....."

"WHAT DID WE DO?" Twilight said commandingly.

"Come-on, Marcus..." Punk said, trying to comfort Marcus. "You can trust us...."

Marcus was tired of this SHIT. He wasn't going to tell ANYBODY about what happened, and that was FINAL.

"I SAID NO, DAMMIT!!!!!!" Marcus screamed at the top of his lungs, pushing through everyone in his Way, he ran out of Sugarcube Corner as fast as he could. He didn't know where he was headed, but he HAD to get away from everybody.

"Poor Marcus..." Pinkie said, tears starting to form in her own eyes.

"I wonder why he won't tell us...." Spike said curiously.

"Austin, CM, how does Marcus usually act on Earth?" Twilight asked, wanting to milk this situation dry. Ewww.....She would.

"Same as he does here." Punk answered nonchalantly. "Always pissed off at something. I think whatever he isn't telling us must be why...."

"It HAS to be!" Austin said, nodding. "He's not like Ryback, though. He interacts with everyone in the locker Room, but he does it in such a sarcastic and snarky way, that he's driven a lot of people away from him all-together."

"Has he driven anyone of you away?" Twilight asked.

"Ryback doesn't seem to like him very much...." Austin explained. "But that's most likely because he's been a bit.....Rude to you Ponies. I personally enjoy his company, I think he's just a lost soul trying to find his way in life. He's only 24 years old, so he has all the Time in the World to do that...."

"I like Marcus, he's a good kid." Punk was about to say more, but Twilight cut him off

"Then why are you always bashing him?" Twilight asked.

"I'm just playing along with him." Punk answered. "I do that to EVERYONE. When I get used to you Ponies, I'll do it to you, too. It's all in good fun, so don't be mad about it." Twilight and Pinkie nodded, meaning that they wouldn't. "Marcus reminds me of myself a LOT, we have the same character Traits, except I tell people that I can trust my own Secrets. Marcus has told me and others secrets before, but whatever this is he's keeping....I've never heard ANYTHING about it. As for the others, Nova and Ze get along with everyone and anyone. They're a bit immature, though, so Marcus sometimes gets into the strict Father role. He yells at them to act their age, but then seconds later, he'll be hugging them."

"Aaaawwww...." Pinkie said genuinely. "Friendship is such a great Thing....." Austin and Punk nodded agreeingly, while PZ-1 and Pyro-Zi gagged to themselves.

Punk continued. "Nathan and Zane? I can't tell who they Like.....They are always too busy watching that Show you guys are on." Everyone laughed. "Only Austin and Freddie like Zane and Nathan, because they grew up together."

"Guuiilllttyyy..." Austin said, sort of wishing that never happened. Pinkie giggled.

"Freddie and Marcus are so similar to eachother, it's scary.....But scary in a good Way. Freddie doesn't treat him as a Brother like he does me or Austin, but I've never heard Freddie complain about the kid. And finally, Freddie's kids? They're KIDS, they like everybody!" At school at that very Moment, Kit was facehoofing at the stereotype.

"Thank you for telling us so much about yourselves..." Twilight said genuinely. "It's only your second Day here, and we already know about half of your Life stories."

"Yeah!" Pinkie said, the happy in her voice back. "You guys ROCK the SOCKS off the DOCK!" Austin and Punk laughed.

"It's no problem....." Austin said.

"I just wished Marcus would tell me more about Himself..." Pinkie said, frowning once again.

"Give him time," Punk replied. "He'll come around."

Meanwhile, Pyro-Zi and PZ-1 were laughing evilly to themselves. "Not if I have anything to say about it...." They said simultaneously.

Ponyville Elementary.....

The fillies and Colts prepared themselves for another fun day of Gym. It was a favorite of almost Everyone, second only to Art. The kids missed Soldier as coach, he was strict, but fair, like Ms. Cheerilee said herself. Their new Coach, however? Well, let's just say, he isn't exactly met with a Warmful Response....

"Hello again, snot nosed BRATS!" Said the Coach, which was met by immediate groans and chills from the Class.

"Iron Will welcomes you, once again, to Iron Will's gym class!" Iron Will, the Coach said, flexing his muscles. He was hired after Soldier left. If people monitored these Children during Gym, this guy would've been fired Already.....

"What's this?" Iron Will said, eying Damian, Kit and Tate. "Looks like there is.....FRESH MEAT in Iron Will's gym class!" He smirked evilly.

Tate, being the idiot he is, licked himself. "Hey! I don't taste like Meat!" And THIS is the future of Earth? Good lord....

Iron Will was not amused. "Are you INSULTING Iron Will's judgements?!"

Tate scratched his head, wondering what a Judgement was. "Ummm.....Yes?" He said, not really sure nor caring about the effect his answer would Have.

Iron Will smirked. "Good....You're a brave one, kid." Tate grinned in a Me Gusta way. "Iron Will likes you, not sure about that face you just made, though..."

"Dude....You're a bull!" Damian said.

"No crap, kid!" Iron Will replied. "Iron Will is proud of his species!"

"I wouldn't be....." Kit said boldly. "You get rode on by numerous people everyday. All you are good for is sport."

Iron Will's eyes bulged at the accusation. "How do you know what Iron Will does in his spare time?!"

"I know MUCH more about your species, too..." Kit said, smirking.

"Ummm, uhhhh....There's...Ya know....No need to release Iron Will's skeletons from his closet...." Iron Will said, sweating nervously.

"I will if you don't take a Hike." Kit warned.

"Y-Yes, sir! Iron Will is leaving!" Iron Will ran out of the school as fast as he could, on his way out, Ms. Peachtree stopped him?"

"Mr. Will, where are you going?" The principal asked.

"Iron Will quits!" Was all the big bull said as he ran out, leaving a stunned Ms. Peachtree without a gym teacher.

"Oh, Damian!" Sweetie Belle said over the toply. "You were SOOOO BRRAAAVVEEE!"

"What about me?" Tate asked, mad for being left out of this.

"Be quiet." Sweetie Belle replied. "You did NOTHING. Damian got that big jerk FIRED!"

"What the...." Tate tried to think of something to say, but was interrupted by Fred.

"Sweetie Belle crazy, yes." Fred said.

"You got that right!" Tate said, nodding.

"Oh, Kit..." Diamond Tiara said, laughing. "How'd you do that?"

"I just knew what made him Tick, I guess." Kit said, shrugging.

"It was AMAZING!" Diamond said. "You're my HERO!" She then lunged herself at Kit in an embrasive hug.

"Uhhh....Thanks..." Kit replied, chuckling nervously.


Meanwhile....

Marcus sat at the Ponyville bridge, wondering where everything went wrong. He was 24 years old, but still worrying about an Event that took place when he was 6 years old.....It was pathetic, he knew, but he would never forget what happened that Day....Not as long as he lived. And he would not tell anybody about what Happened.

Just then, a voice called out to him, "Marcus!" The voice said. Marcus started looking around, but could find nothing.

"Whose there?" Marcus asked, a bit creeped out. A few seconds later, he got his answer. He saw a white figure appear in front of him, a figure he had not seen, for 18 years....

"Marcus!" The voice said once again.

"......Mom?" Marcus called in a whisper. "Is it-Is it really you?"

The figure that was apparently Marcus' mother smiled. "Yes, honey...It's me....But I don't have much time...."

"What is it, Mom?" Marcus smiled from ear to ear, excited that he was talking to his Mother for the first Time.

"I...Need you to do something for me...."

"Anything mom, ANYTHING!"

"I need you....To avenge me......"

"Avenge you? But-But how?"

"Kill the Ponies, Marcus....KILL ALL THE PONIES...."

"Mom? You can't be serious....." Marcus sighed. What she was asking was ludicrous, he wasn't very fond of Ponies either after what happened, but he wasn't going to KILL them!

"They took me away from you....Don't you want revenge?"

"Well, yes, but, I-"

"Then kill them! Avenge your mother, Marcus...I would do the same for YOU."

Marcus couldn't believe it. His mother would NEVER tell him to harm any living thing in any physical way. She was a good woman.....Could death have changed Her? "Why the fuck am I thinking about her intentions?!" Marcus thought. "I wanna know how the FUCK I'm speaking to someone that's dead! This land may be full of magic, but this isn't Magic, it's sorcery!"

Then, it all hit Marcus, in one fell swoop. This WASN'T his mother....You cannot TALK to the dead. Once someone is dead, they are dead....He knew who this was....

"Fuck off, Pyro-Zi...." Marcus said, nothing but anger in his voice.

"You are smarter than I expected...." The figure said. "So, my hypothesis was Correct! Your deep dark Secret has something to do with your, mother, correct?"

"You're the genius..." Sims replied angrily. "Figure it out yourself....And while you're at it....Show yourself, so I can kick your ass!!!!!!" Marcus was pissed now, somehow, someway, Pyro-Zi had created an exact Copy of his mother. It looked just like her, it even SOUNDED just like her!

The figure just laughed. "Oh, Marcus....So eager to be defeated, aren't you? Do not worry, sooner rather than later, I will appear....I just....Need some time to work out my plan, is all."

"DAMMIT, PYRO-ZI!" Marcus screamed. "I'M TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW....SHOW YOUR FUCKING SELF!!!!!"

"Be patient, Marcus.....After all, it's what Mommy would've wanted...." The figure laughed evilly, and soon disappeared.

"SON OF A...BITCH!!!!!" Marcus screamed, he then sat back down on the bridge, and cried his Eyes out.

--------TO BE CONTINUED------

Shit's starting to Heat up.

Bronynapped

A few Hours Later....

The first day of School in Ponyville for Damian, Kit, and Tate was over. Ms. Cheerilee assigned everyone their homework, and told them to have a great day, and that was it.

"See ya'll Tomorrow!" Apple Bloom called out to Damian and Tate.

"Goodbye, Damiaaann......" Sweetie Belle said with a love filled grin, it wanted to make Damian puke right in her face.

"Uhhhh....Bye....." Damian replied awkwardly.

"So, Tate..." Scootaloo started. "When do you wanna have that little race of Ours?"

Tate thought about it for a moment. Which day would be the best day to humiliate this Filly? "This Friday, after school." He replied.

"It doesn't really matter what day," Scootaloo retorted. "You are still going DOWN."

Tate smirked. "Yeah, well.....Go peck someone!"

Scootaloo laughed. "Whatever. Later, loser." She waved goodbye to Tate, as did the others, and Damian and Tate waved back.

"Now..." Damian said. "Where is that nerdy brother of ours?"

Just then, they got their answer. He and Diamond Tiara were the last two to walk out of the Classroom. They, of course, had been talking to eachother all day, and their friendship had really bloomed.

"I guess I will see you later, DT." Kit said, only Silver Spoon got to call Diamond Tiara "DT", but she didn't want to be rude, it would ruin her plan, after all, so she let him call her that.

"Yes you will." Diamond said with a smile. "Oh, there's your brothers. I'm going to try ONE more time..."

"I don't think they like you very much, DT." Kit replied.

"That's because those stupid Cutie Mark Crusaders are in their head. Makes me sick to know that your brothers are hanging around the wrong crowd."

"Yeah!" Kit replied with a scowl. "We should change that!" Diamond nodded, and the two walked over to Damian and Tate.

"Comeon, bro..." Damian started. "Let's go....You're gonna get evil germs All over you."

"What are you talking about?" Kit said in a confused way.

"I can't believe you fell for this dumb girl's charm!" Damian said, aggravated. "And I thought YOU were supposed to be the smart one!"

"I AM!" Kit replied. "And I got a smart friend to prove it. DT knows what she is talking about!"

"You boys are being misled...." Diamond said. "The Cutie Mark Crusaders are BULLIES. They call me a snob, just because my Family makes a lot of Money. They're JEALOUS! They say my Cutie Mark is fake, which proves once again, that they are jealous of me. And now they've got you two wrapped around their hooves."

"But they're right." Tate said.

"No, they aren't." Diamond replied. "You don't know these fillies Like I do, they mean to cause nothing but harm to everyone around Them. Sooner or later, they'll be calling YOUR Cutie Marks fake!"

Tate gasped. "NO! Not the Cutie Marks!"

"Oh, come-on, Tate!" Damian replied with anger in his voice. "Don't fall for her LIES like Kit did! Why don't you just tell us what your little plan is, Diamond Tiara?"

"They're smarter than I figured...." Diamond thought to herself. "Guess I'll have to switch up my technique a bit."

"Come-on, Diamond Tiara...." Damian demanded. "We've figured you out, now spill the beans!"

Diamond Tiara would not be played for a fool, she had a multitude of tricks up her Sleeves. And she would use ALL of them to her advantage. On the drop of a dime, Diamond Tiara's eyes were filled with Tears. Her ability to act should've been her Cutie Mark, she pulls it off so spectacularly.

"Nice fake crying...." Damian replied with a Smirk. "But you aren't going to change what we think about you..."

Just then, Diamond Tiara dropped the bombshell. "I.....I just wanted some FRRRIIIEEENNDDSSS!!!!" She said in between sniffles.

"You.....WHAT?" Damian replied in utter shock. How could someone so evil want Friends?

"The only friend I had....Silver Spoon...Moved to Fillydelphia......I've tried to make more Friends in the past....But those Cutie Mark Crusaders.....THEY TURNED EVERYONE AGAINST MEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" Her acting was leaving a mark of Damian and Tate, they even began to feel sorry for the Filly.

Diamond Tiara continued with her sap Story. "And then....You guys came along....I wanted to get you all to become my Friends....Before those JERKS turned you against me.....I only got through to Kit, though.....By the Time you two were available to talk to.....Those three already had you in their grasp! I'm sorry, you guys......."

"Sorry about WHAT?" Damian asked.

"I'm......I'm sorry.....That I couldn't get to you in time......You were pure before you walked into this School today....But now, thanks to the Cutie Mark Crusaders.....Your minds are tainted......" Now, the crying stopped a bit, but the sobbing got even worse.

"Hey, hey.....Come-on, we'll be your Friends." Damian said, trying to comfort her.

Diamond Tiara pulled her face away from her water Drenched hooves. "....REAAALLLYYY?" She asked hopefully.

"Yeah!" Tate said excitedly. "Flip those girls for being Mean!"

Diamond Tiara smiled wholefully. "OOOOHHHHHH! Thank you guys, so MUCH!" The then wrapped the three Together in am embrace.

"There, there, DT...." Kit said, returning the hug. "All better....."

"Not to sound like I'm too good for this...." Damian started. "But, please, no Hugs yet..."

"Oh, sorry....." Diamond Tiara said, grinning nervously. "I'm just so EXCITED! Now I've got THREE friends! You guys are the best!"

"It's nothing." Damian replied. "Well, we better be getting home."

"I'll see you guys tomorrow!" Diamond Tiara exclaimed as they walked off.

The three boys nodded. "BYE, DIAMOND TIIIIIAAARRRAAAAAA!!!!" Tate screamed at the top of his lungs, it actually made her ears ring a Bit. But she waved non-the-less. After they were out of seeing range, though, she grinned evilly.

"Those IDIOTS....." She said, laughing her prissy laugh.

Cloudsdale......

Nova and Ze stared at their trainer, their mentor, their fellow Pegasus, Rainbow Dash. It was 2:00, but she was STILL asleep!

"What the fuck?!" Nova said, almost as a scream. "How drunk did she get last Night?!"

"Ze thinks she got drunk off Her ass...." Ze replied.

"Maybe we should wake her ass Up...."

"Ze thinks that would be a bad idea...."

"Why?"

"She looks like she doesn't take Shit....."

"Oh PLEASE, she's just a Blue motherfucker...."

Too bad for these two, Rainbow Dash heard EVERYTHING they said. She woke up awhile ago, and pretended to be asleep, just to see if they would say anything bad about her. And they did, so now....They were fucked....

"I'm Cyan, not Blue....." The pegasus said, startling Ze and Nova.

"SHIIITTT!!!!!!!" Nova screamed in fear. "WHAT THE HELL?!"

"I heard every word you jackasses were saying about Me." She said with a scowl.

"Ummmm....." Ze said nervously, him and Nova sweating. "Ze is sorry, Rainbow Dash! DO NOT HURT ZE!"

Rainbow Dash smirked, these two feared Her, and it made her extremely proud of her. "I'm not gonna hurt You..." She said, causing a sigh of relief from Ze and Nova. "I'm just going to have to train you two to death Today."

"YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS..." Nova said with anger in his voice.

"It's either that," Rainbow continued. "Or my Hooves meet your face....."

Ze and Nova sighed. "Ze would like to suggest, how about the latter option?"

Rainbow shook her head. "You pick one, or I pick for you....." Ze and Nova gulped.

"LET'S FLAP DEM MOTHAFUCKIN' WINGS!" Nova said with nothing but confidence in his voice.

Rainbow Dash smiled, going back to her friendly side. "Well alright then...."

Up above them, PZ-2 was using his rocket Shoes to take mental Notes. "Identification: Rainbow Dash. Her element, is the Element of Loyalty. She seems like a friendly Pegasus, but can cop an attitude out of nowhere. Definitely has a temper, which could be an advantage or disadvantage to Pyro-Zi. Approach with Caution...."

PZ-2 finished up his notes, but before he could locate where Rainbow Dash and her trainees had gone, they had flew off at top Speed. PZ-2 checked all around, he figured they would be on the ground, but they weren't, he would now have to look for these fools.

"You must be kidding me....." PZ-2 said with a scowl. "HOW COULD I HAVE LET THEM GET AWAY?!" He then flew around on his Rocket shoes, needing to gather more Evidence, then he remembered the map Pyro-Zi had given him, it could easily track them down for Him. He facepalmed himself for forgetting about such a great piece of Equipment. It showed that the three were on the Clouds, far away.

"I knew that....." PZ-2 said in embarrassment. With that, he flew off before the Pegasus's got to far away.

Carousel Boutique....

Rarity took a deep breath, all of her hard work had finally Paid off. "Goodness....That took more time than I thought...." She had finished stitching up her previously ripped dresses, she had used some industrial style Superglue to glue the heads of her Mannequins back on. She tidied up her business to where it looked as spotless as it had before. She then looked at the clock, and gasped when she saw it was 2:08

"I wonder if those two always sleep this late on Earth...." She said, talking to herself. She decided she would go wake them up. She went upstairs, and then into the guest room, and there Zane and Nathan were, asleep as could be, but next to them on the dresser, was their laptop. It was still on even, and what was even more disturbing, was the Web Page they were on....Rarity threw up in her mouth a little when she saw it.....It was PonyHub.com, the Internets largest Collection of Pony Porn in existence.

"Those.....PERVS!" Rarity thought to herself. Apparently, Zane and Nathan noticed a presence beside their bed, so they woke up, they noticed Rarity and grinned pervertedly.

"Oh, hello there, Rarity...." Nathan said. The two then noticed that Rarity was looking at their laptop, and she did not have a pleasant, or normal look on her face.

"We were just studying....." Nathan tried to explain, he then grew an evil Smile. "Ya know, so the three of us, could make our OWN little movie....."

"Your-You're both SICK!" Rarity huffed. "Did your mother's not teach You how to treat a Lady?!"

Zane and Nathan slowly shook their head. "Nope...." Nathan answered. "But, she did teach us how to get the Drop on someone....."

Rarity's jaw dropped even more. Where these two trying to.....RAPE her? How did they think she would react to that?

With that, Rarity used her magic to literally HEAVE the laptop at Zane and Nathan's head, it came to fast, that there was no way they Could duck, it hit Zane and Nathan head on, and the force, caused it to smash into many pieces.

This was Rarity's opportunity to get some fresh Air....She trotted off as fast as she could, out of her house. She wasn't scared or intimidated by those two in any Way, she just wanted to clear her mind, and take a Walk. As she was walking, though, she was looking at the ground, and soon, she had bumped into someone. Rarity fell to the ground, and it hurt more than she thought.

"Oh, excuse me sir...I wasn't paying attent-" She was going to finish her sentence, until she had realized who she ran into.....

"Whoa there, Princess...." CM Punk said, smirking. "Where you off to with no regard?"

Rarity didn't want to have to talk to HIM again. He was so rude, so ignorant, but at the same time, so....Enticing.

"I was getting away from my guests." Rarity said, gesturing back to her house. "They are complete ANIMALS!"

CM Punk smirked, he was glad this preppy thing was having problems so quickly. "You probably turned them on....They've been known to want Ponies more than their own kind."

"Tell me about it..." Rarity replied. "They....They tried to.....Violate me...."

It didn't take more but 2 seconds for Punk to bust up Laughing on the Ground. "Oh my.....That's RICH! They must have bad tastes....."

Rarity scowled. "What's THAT supposed to mean, Phillip?"

"Figure it out yourself....." Punk said, snickering, he was about to walk off, but Rarity stopped him.

"Wait, Phillip!" She called out.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"What are you doing out here?" She asked curiously.

"Marcus ran from Sugarcube Corner.....He was pissed off bad. So, I'm the official Search Party." He explained.

"Is he alright?" She asked worriedly.

"He's just mad because we wanted to know about something he's not telling us about."

"Do you need some help?" Rarity asked generously, causing Punk to quirk an eyebrow. "I don't want to go back into my home with those.....THINGS in there...."

Punk laughed. "Do YOU need help?" He asked in return, Rarity didn't know what he meant by that.

"....Yes....." She quietly answered, embarrassed.

"Ugh...." Punk complained. "I guess my search Can be put on hold for a while...."

Rarity smiled. "Oh, thank you, Phillip! Your help is MOST appreciated!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...." Punk replied, pushing her thanks away. "I just like kicking these losers' ass....."

So Rarity and Punk walked back to Carousel Boutique to "Exterminate" as Punk put it. But when they got inside the guest Room......Zane and Nathan....Were gone....

PZ-3 snickered as Zane and Nathan were desperately kicking and screaming inside of his sound-Proof bag. He had kidnapped the Bronies, the reason unknown, he just felt like it. He also had a job to do, so he took down his Mental notes. "Identification: Rarity. Her element, is the Element of Generosity. She is perhaps, the most elegant of the Elements. Seems to have a thing for Fashion, being she runs a clothing Operation. Gives help to others instead of asking for help herself. She may look like someone who is easy to take advantage of, but she is really a Firecracker....Ready to explode." PZ-3 finished up his notes, and flew off, learning all he needed to know.

------TO BE CONTINUED--------

Yeah, so....Sorry for the lack of chapters lately. Been ULTRA busy as of late. I will NEVER be this busy again guys, I can promise you that.

You Have.....1 New Message....

Sweet Apple Acres...

Applejack and Apple Bloom got home about 5 minutes before Freddie and his kids, the reason being? Freddie was late picking them up.....After all, Freddie was not used to picking up his children from school. Since they were always on the road with their father, they had their own Tutor that kept them up to par with the other children at school. This tutor seemed to be smarter than any Teacher the boys had ever had, but Tate just could not grasp the concept of Division....He got the Multiplication and Division signs mixed up, but he wasn't exactly the brightest out of his brothers and him. Freddie was once so worry about his Mental Capacities, he took him to a special doctor to see if there was anything wrong with him, but it seemed like Tate had a perfect mind-frame, but just learned and caught on slowly.

"How was school, Apple Bloom?" Applejack asked her sister.

"It was....." Apple Bloom sighed. ".....Fine....." Applejack noticed the disdain in her sister's voice, and became concerned.

"It don't sound like ya'll had a fine time..." Applejack replied. "Somethin' wrong Apple Bloom?"

Apple Bloom didn't know if she should tattle on Kit. It seemed like he wanted nothing to do with her or her friends, all thanks to Diamond Tiara, but if they were to ever make amends, would Tattle-tailing really help the cause? But, she didn't want to lie to her sister, the very own Element of Honesty, after all. So she decided she would tell the truth. "It's Kit...." Apple Bloom started. "He seemed ta like me when he first got here, but today at School...He seemed like he wanted nothin' ta do with me." Applejack frowned.

"What would make Kit turn heel all'uva sudden?" Applejack asked. HA! Wrestling reference.

"Whats'a 'Heel'?" Apple Bloom asked curiously.

"It's just fancy talk for when someone becomes a bad apple." Applejack answered. "Confound these Wrestlers....They drive me to learn their lingo." She though to herself.

"Ooooohhhhh...." Apple Bloom said, she would have to remember that word. "I git it. But, I don't know wha Kit would hate me all uva sudden...." She frowned, and looked down at the ground sadly. She didn't want to tell on Diamond Tiara, either, Apple Bloom would live up to the Apple family tradition of NEVER tattling.

"Ya just need ta remember, sis..." Applejack said, trying to think positive. "Them boys aren't used ta Ponies, non-the-less TALKIN' ponies! They probly just need ta get used to ya, and then they'll be as nice as can be!"

"But that's the problem, sis..." Apple Bloom explained. "Damian and Tate like me, but Kit it being a....Heel."

"Maybe he's the least friendly outta'the bunch." Applejack said, smiling warmly. "Remember, sis, them humans have the same personality traits as all us Pony folk. They can be Honest like me, generous like Rarity, Loyal like Rainbow Dash, hyper and full'a life like Pinkie Pie, or Shy like Fluttershy. Except ah don't think that humans can use magic...." She chuckled, which made Apple Bloom smiled.

"You're right, sis!" Apple Bloom said excitedly. "Ah just need ta be a good friend, and be patient for mah own friends ta come ta me!" She then gasped. "Maybe ah'll get my Cutie Mark for being a good friend!"

Applejack laughed. "Whoa there, pardner....Ya'll are the best friend a lil' filly could have. You'll find your special talent one these days, Apple Bloom. Don't ya forget that."

Apple Bloom nodded, but seriously wondered when that day would come. A few moments later, Freddie and his kids had arrived home, ATV in all in place. Freddie was still shocked he hadn't crashed the damn thing yet.

"We're back." Freddie said. "Can't believe I was late....." He was seriously frustrated that he forgot to pick his own kids up. What a dick.

"It's alright, dad!" Kit stated for the thousandth time. "You're not used to picking us up. We understand if you're late."

"Yeah!" Damian said happily. "Besides, the wait is worth it to get to ride in this BABY." He gestured towards the ATV, petting the hood of it.

"Yeah!" Tate said grinning. "It's......It's........YEAH!" He sure does have an extended vocabulary, doesn't he?

"Ha guys!" Apple Bloom said to the boys, but they just ignored her. "Guys? Guys! I'm talkin' ta ya!"

Tate just cowered in fear. "Please......DON'T HURT ME!" Damian put a hoof on his shoulder to reassure him he'd be alright.

"It's alright, Tate....." Kit said. "We won't associate ourselves with this.....BULLY!" The word stabbed Apple Bloom like a knife to a male Porn Star's dick....Yeah, I know, GREAT analogy!

"Ah ain't a Bully! HONEST!" Apple Bloom pleaded the truth, bu the boys wouldn't be listening.

"What's going on here?" Freddie demanded. "I thought you guys were getting along PERFECTLY!"

"She's a bully, dad!" Damian answered with passion. Kit and Tate nodded angrily, well, atleast Kit nodded angrily, Tate nodded in fear of his life.

"What in the hay are you boys talkin' about?" Applejack answered with a stern voice. "Mah sister is nothin' but an ANGEL!"

"Our good friend Diamond Tiara showed us the LIGHT." Damian answered with confidence.

"Oh no!" Apple Bloom exclaimed. "Damian, Tate, she got ya'll two?!"

"Yeah, she did." Damian answered, Tate nodded. "So she has Money, Apple Bloom? Why do you have to go and make fun of her for it?!"

"Ah don't do that!" Apple Bloom pleaded. "She makes fun of ME for not havin' a Cutie Mark!"

"Boys...." Freddie started. "Who is Diamond Tiara?"

"Her dad's the rich guy who gave you all the money." Tate answered, feeling proud of himself for knowing.

"Oh....." Freddie replied, blinking. "That guy burns Money! I HATE HIM." He crossed his arms in fury.

"Ah assure you boys...." Applejack said to the boys. "Mah sister is anythin' but a Bully. Ya need ta realize that."

The boys still weren't listening, though. "You should BOTH talk to Diamond Tiara." Kit said. "You may learn something..." With that, him and his brothers walked off.

"Ya know what...." Freddie started. "I think we WILL have a talk with Diamond Tiara...." He said with an evil grin.

"What are ya thinkin'?" Applejack asked.

"You, me, and Ms. Cheerilee should have a Student conference with her tomorrow." He answered.

"By golleh, great Idea!" Apple Bloom said with glee. "You git that good for nothin' filly for all she's worth!"

"Great idea, Freddie." Applejack nodded. "Ah assure ya, Apple Bloom...We'll git her good."

Meanwhile, behind a bale of Hay, PZ-4 was taking more mental Notes. "Identification: Applejack. Her element, is the Element of Loyalty, and it shows. Although it seems her little sister doesn't follow her own sister's path. Applejack is a family pony, and is a very hard worker as I've seen. Although this may be a stereotype, she is a Common hick, per se, and everyone knows, most hicks....Are nothing but feeble minded idiots, although I will have to investigate more to see if this is a fact." PZ-4 was just about to wrap things up, but then, after Freddie and Apple Bloom had fled the scene, Big Mac had began to talk to his sister. "What's this? A conversation between siblings? I may want to study this...."

"So, ya ready ta try again?" Applejack asked with a lustful look in her eye.

"Try again?" PZ-4 thought to himself. "What is she talking about? And....That look in her eye, it's almost as if.....No, can't be....."

"Well, I read that it takes a fully 4 days for the pills ta wear off." Big Mac explained, he then grew a perverted smile on his face. "But hey, who says we can't spoil Ourselves?" The two siblings chuckled, and then locked lips in another intense kiss, they made sure noone was around first, of course.

PZ-4's mind was officially blown. He had another lead on the Country pony. He smirked evilly, and took his final note. "Note to self.....Applejack keeps it ALL in the family....Even lovers....." He chuckled to himself, and then went off.

Fluttershy's Cottage.....

Fluttershy was used to this, Angel not eating her food. It was a carrot salad, which is what she ate every day, but only because of....THE STARE. The stare was used when Fluttershy wanted something to go her way, and when something didn't.....She pulled out the stare.

"PLEASE eat your food, Angel...." Fluttershy was literally on her knees, praying to the Steed above. "PLLLEEEAASSEEE...." But all Angel would do was shove the grub away and cross her arms.

"Fine...." Fluttershy replied. "If you won't eat it....I guess a certain facial expression is going to have to make a return...." Angel immediately gulped, not wanting this to happen again.

Ryback didn't know what Fluttershy was talking about, but he didn't want anything to happen to the poor bunny, so he decided to intervene. He quickly got on his knees, and began to eat just a bit of the salad. Angel watched as Ryback nomed and nomed and nomed with a big smile on his face, which made Angel curiously sniff the bowl. If Ryback liked it, Angel had the mindset that she would like it as well. She was about to dig in, but before she had the chance, Fluttershy dunked her head right into it forcefully.

"HA HA HA HAAAAAAAA!!!!!" Fluttershy laughed. "EAT UP, ANGEL!!!!!!!" Flutterbitch.....Was here. Only for a few seconds, though. Because Fluttershy realized what she had just turned into. She quickly cowered in fear.

"I'm.....Sorry you had to see that....." Fluttershy apologized scarily to Ryback. The big guy didn't know what to think of the cute pony turning evil, but he understood her frustration, and ultimately just smiled and petted her mane.

"I'm.....SOOOO sorry, Angel...." She tried to apologize to Angel, who finally had fished herself out of the salad bowl. But she would have none of it, as she quickly jumped in Ryback's arms and shivered in fear.

Ryback smiled awkwardly, not knowing what to make of this. "Oh my....." Was all Fluttershy could say.

"Oh my is right...." The final clone, PZ-5 said mentally. He was the only Clone left who hadn't taken any notes (Atleast in order from the Events, in reality, most of these events occur at the same Time.) so he decided he had seen enough. "Identification: Fluttershy. Her element, is the Element of Kindness. Her name, speaks for herself, she is in fact, very Shy, and usually likes to hang out with Animals. And while she may be good with Animals, if her pleas are denied, her attitude will change, and when that happens.....Please step back 100 feet. All in all, she is the Wildcard of the Elements of Harmony, as I could not find out much about her, maybe she will open up next time I am around." He had finished up his notes, but in his ear, there was an incoming message through the sound-proof ear piece, only the person it was attached to could hear it. PZ-5 answered it, knowing that only Pyro-Zi or any of the other clones could send one.

"Attention, Original Pyro-Zi, and all other PZ units...." The message played back, it was PZ-3, this was surely important. "When you are finished with your notes, meet back at the Base....I.....Have a bit of a surprise for you all." The message ended with PZ-3 laughing manically.

"What a freak....Glad I don't laugh like that..." PZ-5 said mentally. He shook his head, and then went off to the Cave.

Carousel Boutique....

Rarity gasped. Nathan and Zane were gone! Missing! They were just there, and now they weren't! Where were they? How far could they go in such little time? All CM Punk could do was smile.

"Maybe they died...." Punk said, chuckling.

"Why would you THINK that?!" Rarity said, screaming disappointingly at Punk. "That would be absolutely DREADFUL, just DREADFUL!"

"They almost licked your Head boner..." Punk replied, gesturing toward Rarity's horn. Rarity almost threw up, wondering how Punk could mix two different things up. "And you DON'T want them dead?!"

"While what they were about to do was uncalled for..." Rarity continued. "Noone deserves to perish...."

"Not even me?" Punk asked curiously.

"Not even you....." Rarity answered simply.

"Oh, you're such a doll." Punk said in his best British Accent, which wasn't very good.

"This is serious, Punk....." Rarity shook her head.

"Yeah, I know.....Two grown men who everyone hates are missing. Who cares?"

"No, not that....." Rarity rolled her eyes.

"Then what the hell are you on About?!" Punk exclaimed, utterly confused.

Rarity's magical-come-out-of-nowhere-sofa appeared from out of nowhere. Rarity literally slumped onto the sofa, and whined, "Now I don't have anyone to keep me COMMMPPPAANNNYYYYYYY!!!!!" She started crying uncontrollably, as Punk's eyes just bugged out.

"Well, that sucks...." He replied. "Gotta go, see ya."

He was about to leave, but Rarity stopped him. "WAAAAIIIITTT!!!!!!!!" She yelled, Punk cringed as he heard her voice. "Phillip, would you like to be bestowed the HONOR....Of being my Guest in this house?" She immediately stopped crying, and batted her eyes multiple times.

Punk felt like laughing, but was just too shocked to. "The HONOR?" Was all he managed to say.

"YES!" Rarity exclaimed. "The HONOR! You wll be living in the House of Ponyville's most GLAMOROUS resident! Oh, just think of how high your stock will go up....You will be, dare I say it, A STAR!"

Punk thought about it, long and hard, he really REALLY thought about it harder than anything he had ever contemplated in his life. After a few silent moments, Punk knew the only logical answer to such a question. ".............No." He was about to leave again, but Rarity blocked the door.

"Why NOOOOOTTTT?!" She whined.

"Because.....You're.....YOU." Punk explained. "You and me are nothing alike. Plus, the fact that I hate you doesn't help."

Rarity's jaw dropped. How could anyone say such AWFUL things about her?! "Maybe we can learn to become Friends! Please, Phillip....I'm very grateful that you would take Time out of your busy schedule to help a Pony such as me in need."

"But....You're......YOU." He repeated once again.

"Yes," She replied. "I'm me.....And you are indeed you. Why sleep on the itchy hay bales of a Friend and work all day, rather then sleep on a soft, Comfortable, nearly soft as a Cloud bed of an Enemy and not have to do ANYTHING all day?"

"Well, when you put it like that...." He contemplated some more.

"I know we have our differences." Rarity continued. "But the ponies with the Greatest differences always turn out to become the best of Friends!"

"You want to be.....FRIENDS..." Punk said aghast. "With.....ME?"

"Why OF COURSE!" Rarity proclaimed. "You have got me all wrong, Phillip! As I'm sure I've gotten you wrong. I am the Element of Generosity, and I am being Generous enough to share my home with you. I like Company with me while I work, otherwise this job is dull.....So please, Phillip, put your pride aside, and just say yes!"

If this was ANYONE but Rarity, he would have said yes. Punk KNEW what Rarity was, and it was something he didn't like...But a free Home, is a free Home after all. He groaned louder than he ever had, but his mind had been made up. "FFFFFIIIIINNNNEEEEEE....." He was finally able to say. Rarity jumped with excitement, while Punk was not to her liking, surely he wasn't as annoying or.....TOUCHY as her last guests.

"You aren't.....Into....Ponies by any chance....ARE YOU?" She curiously asked, if he said yes, she would be kicking his ass THROUGH that door.

Punk laughed, what an idiotic question. "Let me check...." He quickly looked at his penis, and it was as small as it was before. "Well, my dick says no, and my heart says no....But my brain says.....FUCK NO!" Rarity cringed at the unpleasant words. But she knew he wouldn't be as bad as the Bronies.

"You have nothing to worry about, Princess...." Punk mocked her attitude. "I'm not a perv, and I CERTAINLY don't like you. You've got nothing to worry about." He smirked.

"Ummmm.....Splendid." Rarity said, chuckling nervously. "GREAT! Everything is fine!" Rarity thought to herself. "But as a matter of fact....It is NOT fine. A handsome Stallion is in my house, MY HOUSE! I NEED to control myself.....I hate him, he hates me.....Nevermind, everything IS fine!" Rarity then grinned, as Punk went off to look at his room.

Rarity sighed, upset she had thrust herself into this situation. "I hope...."

-----TO BE CONTINUED-------

Let's Get RAW

One hour later....

Sweet Apple Acres....

CM Punk came back to the farm, to let everyone know that he was going to move in with Rarity.

Freddie chuckled. "Oh, Phil...You sly dog, you...." Freddie always told Punk that chicks, and in this case, mares dig the beard.

"I don't think she likes me, Hediger." Punk replied. "She just wants company around her, and since Nathan and Zane.....Got kidnapped, she asked me."

Freddie was a bit shocked, not sure if he heard that correctly. "What was that? Did you say that Zane and Nathan got....Kidnapped?"

Punk sighed. "Kidnapped, Bronynapped, Retardnapped, Annoyingfuckernapped....Who cares?! They're out of our life, and that's all that matters."

Freddie nodded. The only thing the Bronies did for him was get him to watch My Little Pony, and if he ever found them, he would thank them, and then....He'd wish them good luck in Hell...Then leave. Yup, he's a good person. "I'm still worried, though...About Marcus...."

Punk looked at the ground with a sad expression. "Yeah. me too....His secret must be pretty damn horrible if he has to RUN away when someone confronts him about it. I'm gonna go look for him on my way to Rarity's place."

Freddie nodded. "I've looked around a bit, myself...And can't find him, either. But I'm sure he'll show up somewhere. He's not one to just quit on life."

Punk nodded. "Yeah, he's a tough kid." Punk then noticed the bag of bits in Freddie's hand. "Where the hell you going with that money?"

Freddie blushed, not sure if he should answer it, but he decided he would, anyway. "I've been clamoring for some liquor, man...." Punk facehoofed immediately. "I asked Applejack where the liquor store was, and she said it was close to Rarity's. It's owned by a pony named Berry Punch. I'm gonna go get some right now."

"You pathetic bastard..." Punk said, shaking his head. Freddie scowled.

"Hey! I need this shit, man...." Freddie exclaimed. "I mean...Look where we are! Fucking talking ponies are around us, for fuck's sake. Maybe the liquor will fuck up my brain, and make me think I'm still talking to humans." He and Punk chuckled.

"I'm gonna laugh when I see you passed out, floating on top of the Water by the bridge." Punk replied.

Freddie laughed. "Been there, done that....." He said.

Punk chuckled, but still shook his head. "Man, I love my friends....." He thought to himself. He then called out to Applejack, "I'll see ya later, AJ, and BM!"

Applejack and Big Mac waved. "Ya'll have a safe trip now!" She said. With that, Freddie and Punk walked with eachother, each having their own destinations in mind.

Four hours later.....

The original Pyro-Zi, PZ-1, PZ-2, PZ-4, and PZ-5 were patiently waiting outside their base. They got the message from PZ-3, wait outside the cave, but they had been waiting for about an hour, and honestly, they weren't very patient.

Just before their patient ran dry, PZ-3 came zooming in on his rocket shoes. He made a soft landing on the ground, and looked to have a devilish look plastered on his face.

"Well, well, well...." PZ-2 said. "It's about time you showed up...."

"I sincerely apologize for keeping you all waiting..." PZ-3 said. "But, my surprise was....Holding me back a bit...."

"Very well...." The original Pyro-Zi replied, he then noticed the bag PZ-3 was carrying. "What is in the bag?"

"This?" PZ-3 replied. "This....Is my surprise. Let us go inside the cave.....Just in case someone sees us."

Pyro-Zi and the other clones, nodded. Pyro-Zi typed in the code to open the metallic door, "Zansux", which has a story that goes with it, and they were in.

"Alright," PZ-1 said. "We are in....Now, reveal!"

PZ-3 nodded, and pulled on the drawstring of the bag, turned it upside down, and out came Zane and Nathan. Pyro-Zi and the clones gasped at the site of two of their co-workers.

"So?" Pyro-Zi said, not impressed. "It's just the ones called Zane and Nathan. What do they matter?"

"Don't you see?" PZ-3 replied. "Zane and Nathan watch the Television show all of these Ponies appear on. And from what they told me, they know more about these characters than we could possibly know!"

"I think I understand...." PZ-5 blurted out. "So, we interrogate them into telling us all the know about the Elements of Harmony?"

PZ-3 nodded. "Precisely. Not only the Elements of Harmony, but anything else about Equestria. Their knowledge of this continent goes Quite far."

Pyro-Zi, and the clones smirked. "Fantastic job, PZ-3!" Pyro-Zi congratulated, which resulted in a bow from PZ-3. "You have made a great discovery....Tie them up, and we can get to work...."

Zane and Nathan gulped, they were about to run away, but before they even had a chance, PZ-3 tied them up with some exclusive Oncerope. It was powered, by powerful Onceria energy watts. If Pyro-Zi felt those tied up were being a bit too...Fussy, he could press a button, and 50,000 watts of Onceria electricity would send shockwaves through their bodies. Not enough to kill them, but still enough to let them know who the boss is.

"I wouldn't squirm if I were you...." Pyro-Zi warned, and revealed the button to them. "You get antsy, my thumb gets antsy, and presses the button. And we wouldn't want that, would we?" Zane and Nathan slowly but surely shook their heads, this please Pyro-Zi. "Good....Now, let's begin...."

One hour later....

Monday Night RAW....

The crowd was electric, as the pryo exploded throughout the arena. It was 8:00, and it was Monday. For Wrestling fans all over the World, this meant only one thing....It was time, for the most watched Television Show at the current Moment, Monday Night RAW!

"Welcome everyone....To Monday...Night RAW!" Exclaimed Michael Cole, the lead announcer of the RAW broadcast team. "I, am Michael Cole, and I am alongside Alex Shelley, and Simon Cowell!"

"Thank you very much, Mitchell." Simon Cowell said, resulting in a facepalm from Alex Shelley. "What was that hand gesture for, Wheelie?"

"I'll tell you what it was for......YOU STUPID SON OF A..." Alex tried to finish his statement, but Michael quickly stopped before this went too far.

"Comeon, you two.....Mr. Lauranaitis is in the ring, and I've been told he has a big Announcement regarding the current state of the WWE."

"Fuck that prick!" Shelley exclaimed. "He smokes 6 packs of cigarettes a day."

"You cur!" Cowell responded. "Have some respect for your boss! Would you be saying those same things about me if I was GM?"

"Fuck no..." Shelley answered. ".....I'D SAY STUFF MUCH WORSE!" He then erupted in a storm of Laughter. Cowell just scowled.

"May I have your attention, please....?" The crowd erupted in a chorus of boss as John Lauranaitis began to talk. "My name.....Is Mr. John Lauranaitis....I am the Executive Vice President of Talent Relations....And the NEW, Permanent General Manager....Of both RAW, and Smackdown!" He exclaimed, with a grin on his face. He was right, Alexis Washington, the FORMER General Manager of Smackdown, and Freddie's wife, was now fired, and the Board of Directors figured Big Johnny had what it took to manage both brands, so he got the Job.

Some random fat guy from the Crowd was not happy about this decision, however, as he yelled, "SHUT UP, FAGGOT!" Mr. Lauranaitis heard this, and keeping as cool as a cucumber, just continued smiling and replied, "Thank you! You will be receiving a Christmas Card from me, sir!" The crowd booed some more.

"If he can even buy a Christmas Card after wasting all his money on cigarettes...." Shelley mumbled, but Simon quickly shushed him.

"I, have a Major announcement tonight..." Lauranaitis continued. "It involves a multitude of Superstars, and even our own WWE Champion...Last night, at the end of the Over a Limit Pay Per View..."

"It's Over THE Limit, dumbass!" Shelley yelled, but Simon once again shushed him.

"WWE Officials noted that many WWE Superstars, were not in the locker room....Security cameras show, that they never even left the Building. This brings up many questions, and for right now, I have the important Job to tell you all, the WWE Universe...That the following Superstars, are now...Among the missing..." The crowd gasped, and the cameras were showing many had a look of perplexity on their face.

"Ryback....." Lauranaitis began listing off names. "Austin Ross.....Nathan Bougeno....Zane Dotson......Nova....Ze....United States Champion, Marcus Sims....Pyro-Zi.....WWE Champion, CM Punk.....WWE Chairman, Freddie Hediger....And finally, Freddie's children, Damian, Kit, and Tate." Many jaws were dropped. The crowd wondered how this could happen? How could so many WWE Superstars be missing?

"Oh my god...." Cole mumbled sincerely.

Lauranaitis tried to calm everyone down. "I know you all have questions about the whereabouts of such Superstars....You all must have questions, but the fact of the Matter is....I don't have answers. In fact, nobody does right now. Although, inside the locker room, that all these Superstars shared, I think it is worthy to note, that we found some type of device....What the device does, we do not know. But, we can gather that it belongs to Pyro-Zi. We will find out what the device does, and if it leads us to the residence of our lost Superstars. Do NOT worry, this is a travesty, yes. Be we PROMISE you all this, we WILL find these young Men and children, and bring them back to your Television screens...As soon as Possible!" The crowd began cheering, not for Lauranaitis, bot for justice. "Thank you all for your time....And try to have a great Night!" With that,, Lauranaitis left, leaving the fans to feel better, but the fact was....This had all happened so quickly, many of them had no idea how to react.

"How in the hell does something like this happen?!" Shelley wondered.

"I'm not sure, Alex...." Cole replied. "But we have NO United States Champion, NO WWE Champion....Hell, we don't even have a CHAIRMAN! This is absolutely AWFUL!"

"Serves them right...." Cowell said, causing an immediate nut shot from Shelley, which sent him crumbling to the ground.

"You asshole..." Shelley exclaimed. "I hope you become among the Missing!"

Meanwhile.....

Pyro-Zi and his clones were pleased. They had milked out everything Zane and Nathan knew about Equestria, and honestly, it was A LOT! But Pyro-Zi's computer could still tell even more.

"What are you gonna do with us?" Zane asked, obviously terrified.

Pyro-Zi and his clones gave eachother looks, trying to think of a worthy answer.

"What would you like us to do with you?" PZ-2 asked.

"Let us go without any harm." Nathan answered, Zane nodded.

It looked like Pyro-Zi and his clones were going to agree to that decision, but before they could say yes, PZ-3 pulled out a large Katana, and quickly slashed off both of their heads. The blood squirted all over the cave, and some moved onto PZ-3's face.

"Letting you go would be....Too civil...." PZ-3 said with a smirk.

"You.....Are soooo.....RUDE." PZ-5 exclaimed with a scowl. PZ-3 just shrugged.

Two hours later.....

Marcus was standing at the door of Sugarcube Corner. He was sure that Pinkie Pie would be there once he opened the door, crying more than she ever had in her life. Marcus would just have to deal with it.

He sighed, and opened the door, the lights were still on, and Marcus' prediction was correct. Pinkie was 10 feet away from him, and as soon as she saw Marcus, she hopped in excitement.

"MARKY! YOU'RE BACK!" Pinkie screamed, and immediately pulled Marcus in for a hug. Marcus still felt wrong about hugging a Pony, but he didn't want to be rude, so he just took the Punishment.

"Yeah...." Was all Marcus could say as a reply.

"I was SOOOO worried about you!" Pinkie exclaimed, on the verge of tears. "EVERYPONY was!"

"I just needed some time to think for Myself...." Marcus replied.

"Are you alright?" Pinkie asked with concern.

Marcus smiled. "I'm fine. I just hope you realize, I can't tell you my secret....."

Pinkie smiled understandingly. "I know! I wish you could, though....But I understand. I have a lot of secrets I'm too scared to tell people, too!"

"Yeah? Well, this secret is bigger than yours...." Marcus mumbled, but Pinkie heard.

"Did someone get hurt?" Pinkie asked curiously.

Marcus began to think about his mom, and then sudden flashbacks from that eerie day entered his brain once again.

"Can't tell ya...." Marcus replied. "...It's a secret...."

-------TO BE CONTINUED---------

Drunken State

"Well, I'll see ya later I guess." Freddie said to Punk as they approached Rarity's doorstep. "Need to get so drunk that I can't even spell drunk correctly."

Punk rolled his eyes, if Freddie wasn't trying to tease him, it wasn't working. "Before you do that...." Punk started. "I need to tell you, I'll be needing my ATV back."

"Then how the hell am I supposed to get my kids to school?" Freddie asked with a hint of frustration in his voice.

"That's not my problem, chief..." Punk replied. "Figure it out yourself."

There was no use arguing when Freddie had liquor to consume. "Ugh, fine...." He said. "I'll bring it by tomorrow. Besides, I have to yell at a little filly tomorrow, and the Hangover I have will cause me to make her cry."

"You are a sad, sad man...." Punk said, shaking his head.

"Yeah?" Freddie said. "Well, in 5 minutes, you're gonna be humping a Pony. So fit that one on for size!" He said with a smirk, and with that, he walked off to Berry Punch's.

"Good comeback, loser!" Punk yelled, chuckling. He looked at Carousel Boutique. Should he really be moving in with a Mare he hated? If he did this...He would probably be hanging himself within the hour....But in his opinion, it was MUCH better than working with two incest siblings all day. So he would take the chance. Punk didn't have good manners, so instead of knocking on the door and waiting patiently to open it, he just grabbed the doorknob, and proceeded to turn it. But unfortunately, the door was locked.

"What the?" Punk said, desperately turning the knob over and over again. "Oh hell no....." Punk couldn't believe it. On his first night living in Rarity's house, he couldn't even live in Rarity's house!

"RARITY!" Punk called, but noone answered. Punk yelled again, still no answer. "Where the fuck is she?" Punk wondered. "Could this night get ANY worse?" Punk thought to himself. Just as that thought entered his mind, it began Raining......Punk had no cover, and immediately started getting drenched from the droplets.

Meanwhile.....

"Oh shit!" Freddie said, caught off the by the random rain. "This shit sure came out of nowhere.....Guess I'd better hoof it!" He said, he then trotted off as fast as he could, the only place that could be used as cover from the rain, was Freddie's destination, Berry Punch's liquor shop. It didn't take long for Freddie to get there, as he was trotting faster than he had ever ran before. Freddie noticed the flashing OPEN sign on the store, and immediately sighed with a smile.

"Finally..." Freddie said excitedly. He wondered what kind of liquor ponies drank. Could ponies even hold their liquor? He hoped so....He did not want to puke after just one Margarita. Freddie entered the liquor store, and all he needed was a few short seconds of curious looking, and he realized....That he had found....THE MOTHER-LOAD.

If this was heaven, Freddie was glad to be dead....There was nothing but Alcohol.....Freddie had never seen so much Alcohol...It was putting him in a daze. But a voice awoken him for the time being.

"Freddie?" The voice, said. Freddie turned around, and saw who it was. It was Rarity, and she was carrying.....A bottle of Wine? Freddie was surprised. From how Rarity carried herself, Freddie did not expect a Mare like herself...To drink.

"Rarity?" Freddie replied, not taking his eyes off of the wine held in her hoof. "What....Are YOU doing here?"

Rarity laughed. "I know what you are thinking.....You didn't expect a Pony like ME to be a drinker, did you?"

"Well....You just don't seem like the type." Freddie replied, shrugging.

"Well, I assure you." Rarity continued. "I am not a HEAVY drinker, but every once in a while....I feel the need to....Give my system....A cleanse."

"You mean get drunk...." Freddie said with a smirk. "Don't you?"

Rarity shook her head. "I do not drink enough to get "drunk". I just consume enough to put me....On edge."

"Ahhhhh....." Freddie understood. "I see....Enough to give your system that "KICK" it needs."

"Precisely." Rarity responded, nodding. "And what of yourself? You obviously aren't here to look for gold."

Freddie chuckled. "I'll be the first to admit it.....I get drunk about.....5 times a night."

Rarity cringed. "I don't think that is very healthy, dear...."

"You're right." Freddie said. "But I am a Wrestler, so combined with my good diet and exercise, the Alcohol doesn't affect me too much."

"I see...." Rarity responded. "What kinds of Alcohol do you consume?"

Freddie smirked. Oh....This would be fun. "Lets see......The basics, like plain old Beer, Wine, Tequilla, Margaritas, Schnapps. And then....We get into a little more of the uncommon Alcohol. There's Ale, then there's Banana beer, Bappir, Boza, Brem, Brunswick Mum, Cask ale, Cauim, Chhaang, Chicha, Choujiu, Chuak, Cock ale, Cuirm, Draught beer, Gluten free Beer, Gruit, Happoshu, High gravity Beer, Huangjiu, Ibwatu, Kvass, Lager, Malt beer, Mbege, Mild ale, Mild beer, Oshikundu, Pito, Radler, Sahti, Shandy, Smoked beer, Tella, Tiswin, Tongba, Umqombothi, Zozu, Zutho, Egyptian, zythos-" Freddie could have gone on ALL NIGHT, but he was interrupted by Berry Punch.

"Holy cow!" Berry said. "You named off liquor I had never even heard of!"

"Who are you?" Freddie asked politely.

"I'm Berry Punch!" Berry said gleefully. "I own this fine shop."

The first thing Freddie did, was shake Berry's hoof. "I must congratulate you, ma'am! This is a FINE liquor establishment!"

Berry giggled. "Thank you! You're Freddie Hediger, right?"

"That's me." Freddie answered.

"How is liquor on Earth? Is it a lot more advanced there than here?" Berry asked curiously.

"Well..." Freddie started. "I haven't heard of barely ANY of these types of Alcohol. "Bright Sunshine", "Spring Meadows", for god's Sake....One of these is called "Swamp Ass"! Most of these don't sound like Alcohol....They sound like Children's cough Medicine!" His voice nearly broke as he whined.

Berry laughed. "What do you expect? This is the land of talking Ponies. EVERYTHING has to sound Girly and nice."

Freddie nodded, she DID have a point. "True....."

"Don't let the names fool you, though..." Berry continued. "This Alcohol is the BOMB! Isn't that right, Rarity?"

"Well.....Atleast the Wine is." Rarity answered, smiling.

"Rarity....Do you only drink wine?" Freddie asked curiously.

"Why.....Yes." Rarity answered, causing Freddie to gasp.

"That's right! Rarity is my number 1 wine Buyer!"

"Wow....Impressive." Freddie said. "But....Why just Wine? You are missing out on SO many other great Beverages!"

"A classy Pony such a me would not DARE consume...." She cringed. ".....Beer....Wine is the type of Beverage for me!"

Freddie was a bit ticked off, but respected her opinion. "Well alright then. Berry, what would you recommend to a first time Equestrian alcohol buyer?"

"Oh!" Berry exclaimed, immediately getting excited. "I recommend EVERYTHING! All of this alcohol is just....It creates a Mariachi band in your mouth!"

Freddie was impressed, but not sure if he could trust her judgement. She was a lady after all, and everyone knows....Men know more about alcohol than woman.

"I guess I'll round some stuff up, then....." Freddie said, pondering over which alcohol would suit him the best.

A few moments later, Rarity and Freddie were ready to pay. Freddie had 5 bottles of Alcohol. 1 bottle of "Midsummer Night's Dream", (Yes, Theater and Film reference) 1 bottle of "Rainy Days", 1 bottle of "Beaming Sunlight", 1 bottle of "Too Many Limes", (Good job if you get the Reference.) and finally, 1 bottle of "Swamp Ass". Berry noticed the bottle of the crudely Titled Alcohol, and looked curiously at Freddie.

Freddie blushed. "Just curious...." He said. Berry laughed, and concluded the price.

"That'll be 13 bits, Freddie." Berry said. Freddie willingly gave her the 13 bits, and was handed the Alcohol in bags. "And 3 bits from you Rarity." Rarity smiled, and pulled out the bits, but in the process, Rarity had learned of a horrible tragedy.

"DRAT!" Rarity gasped. "I'm one bit Short!"

"Not a problem...." Freddie said, as he laid another bit on the counter.

"What? But, Freddie......Why?" Rarity stammered.

"Because NO mare should be crushed of her Alcoholic desires!" Freddie said in Shakespeare style.

"There's no need...." Rarity said, shaking her head. "I can wait until next time."

"Oh no, no, no..." Freddie replied. "I INSIST." He smiled.

"Well...." Rarity chuckled. "If you say so...." She smiled.

"Alright then," Berry said, putting the bits in the cash register. "You're all set. Have a good day!"

Rarity waved, while Freddie called out, "Bye, Berry!" Rarity and Freddie stepped out of the store, and were IMMEDIATELY drenched by rain.

"Oh for the love of Celestia..." Rarity groaned, as she used her Magic to pull out her umbrella.

Freddie looked on in awe. "Convenient..."

Rarity giggled. "Is Phillip at my House at the Moment?"

"Oh yeah." Freddie answered. "He's drenched, no doubt...."

"Oh, poor dear...." Rarity said, holding her hoof over her mouth. "We must get home RIGHT AWAY!" She trotted off, and Freddie was BARELY able to catch up to her.

"Why are you so worried about Punk, anyway?" Freddie asked curiously. "I thought you both HATED eachother!"

"Yes, we do." Rarity responded. "But he doesn't deserve to be outside in this Kind of weather! I'm curious, though....Why IS he so hostile towards me?"

Freddie had the answer to that. It was quite simple. "He's an ass." Was all Freddie needed for an answer.

"Hmmmm....." Rarity thought, wondering how such good friends could be so mean to eachother. Must be an earth thing....

Meanwhile.....

Twilight's Library....

"So," Austin began. "You sure we're cool, Spike?"

"Now we are." Spike answered. "I was just being jealous before.....Twilight always gives me ALL of her attention. And when you came along, that all went away. But, I realize now, you aren't here to steal her from Me, she just wants to know about your surroundings....And I'm cool with that. I'm sorry...." He said sincerely.

"It's alright, man." Austin replied, smiling.

"I think this would be a good topic for a letter to Princess Celesttttiiaaa...." Twilight said sing-songingly.

"Got it!" Spike said, jumping up and rushing to the scroll. "Lay it on me!"

Twilight smiled. "Dear Princess Celestia, Usually, I am the one who learns about friendship....But today, that honor goes, to my dear assistant Spike, who has indeed learned something about Friendship, thanks to my new human Friend, Austin Ross. That's your cue, Spike."

"Oh yeah...." Spike said, clearing his throat. "I have learned, that you should not judge a person's intentions by where they are from. Someone may look like a bad person, but in reality, they are just trying to fuel the desire of Knowledge, and even if you believe otherwise, you should ALWAYS give someone the benefit of the doubt. Sincerely, your Faithful Student's AWESOME assistant, Spike." With that, Spike rolled up the letter, and blew his Signature fire at it, and then, the letter Was gone.

"Did you REALLY have to call yourself awesome?" Twilight asked, doubting her Assistant's words.

"Well, it's true, isn't it?" Spike retorted.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Oh, Spike....." She and her friends Laughed.

Meanwhile.....

Sugarcube Corner....

Marcus lay in his bed, numerous thoughts running through his Head. He KNEW that was not his Mother, it was Pyro-Zi....Who somehow took the shape of his mother. But it WAS his mother's voice, and Marcus ALWAYS listened to his mother. She told him to "Avvenge her...." Which Marcus knew what that meant. It meant, that he would have....To kill Ponies. After what happened on that day, Marcus had ALWAYS wanted to kill some Ponies, to exact revenge on what had occurred, but he never had the guts to do it. Marcus didn't have the Guts......The guts.....The guts.....

"I DO have Guts!" Marcus thought angrily to himself. "I can do it anytime I want!" Marcus kept thinking about his encounter with his "Mother". It was her, it was ALL her, just a different Person controlling her. No matter, his mother's voice SAID...."To kill the Ponies".....

......Marcus would do, just that.

------------TO BE CONTINUED---------




TROLOLOLOLOL, back to the story.

Marcus got up from his bed, he went into Pinkie's room to check on her, she was Asleep......This was good for Marcus, it would make his job THAT much easier. He slowly crept into the Kitchen, and grabbed his Weapon, a Knife. A simple Knife.....It was simple, but it was good Enough to Marcus. Ponies didn't DESERVE to die a fancy Death, so he would use the Knife....

Marcus once again, crept into Pinkie's room, and stopped at her bedside. He stared at her body, who was quietly in a slumber. "She looks so Cute..." Marcus thought. He then smirked creepily. "...Cute enough to KILL!" He screamed out loud this time, but right before he could drive the knife Clear through Pinkie's heart, the pink Pony sprang up herself, and thrust her own Knife into Marcus' face. Marcus crumpled to the floor automatically, and the sharp blade was lodged into his brain.

"You thought you could get the drop on me, Marcus? HUH?!" Pinkie screamed. She was talking to herself, however, as Marcus was dead on the Impact of the knife. Pinkie got up from her bed, and pulled the knife out of Marcus' head. However, that knife was SO stuck, that Marcus' ENTIRE face come off with it!

Pinkie was not scared at this, she was actually quite Happy. She didn't know Marcus' secret, be she KNEW of his hatred for Ponies. She figured one night, he would try to murder her, so for protection, she hadn't slept since he got here, and she also wielded a knife in her bed, just in case. Tonight, was that case...

Pinkie stared at the face, and actually felt sympathy for Marcus. "Awwwwww, Poooorrrr Marrrkkyyyy...." She cried, but it seemed like she was bluffing. "You look like a shish-kabob! And I LOVE shish-kabob's!" At that, Pinkie scraped Marcus' face off of the knife, and began to eat it.

"Hmmm....." Pinkie thought about the taste of the face. "Pretty good for a Midnight snack, but.....It needs more Whipped Cream!" Pinkie ran into the kitchen, grabbed some Whipped cream from out of the Fridge, sprayed quite a bit into her mouth, and THAT did the trick. Pinkie was now enjoying the taste way more than before.

"Mmmmmmmmmmm!" Pinkie moaned. "That tastes Scrumptious Dumptious!" She swallowed the food, and swiped the debris off her teeth with her tongue.

"That sure hit the SPOT!' She exclaimed, excitedly. She leaned over at the rest of Marcus' dead body, and planted a kiss on where his head would have been. "Goodnight, Marky!" She said, and then, she laid her head on her pillow, and drifted off back to sleep.

Meanwhile....

Carousel Boutique....

That had done it. CM Punk....Was officially....Pissed. He was invited to stay with Rarity for a while, and on the night he TRIES to move in, she's NOWHERE in sight. That was, until, Punk saw her and Freddie running to him as fast as they could.

"Oh, Phil, DARLING!'' Rarity said, obviously worried. "Please, forgive me, I had to get out and get some Wine, and you said you weren't moving in until Tomorrow!"

"I changed my Mind....." Punk said, obviously pissed.

"Uh oh..." Freddie said, obviously worried. "I'd better go....See ya, guys!" With that, he ran off, not wanting to get in the middle of this.

"Please, Phillip. I PROMISE, as long as you are a Guest at my House, it will NEVER happen again...."

"No need to make any promises to me, Princess...." Punk replied, rolling his eyes. "I KNOW what it's like.....When you need your Wine, you NEED your wine!"

"You do?" Rarity said, a bit of weight lifted off her shoulders.

"No..." Punk said, a hint of "You know I'm fucking Straightedge!" Playing off his voice. ".....Because I don't drink....."

BOOM. The weight fell on Rarity's shoulders like an Anvil. "I am DEEPLY sorry, once Again! It will not happen again! You are my guest, and you will be treated with as much Respect as I treat myself!"

Punk chuckled. "That's gonna be a LOT of damn respect, then...."

"Is that a compliment?" Rarity asked curiously.

"Hell no." Punk answered, causing Rarity to sigh.

Meanwhile.....

"AH!" Marcus screamed as he sat up in bed. "Holy fuck.....It was just a nightmare.....HOLY SHIT, SHE ATE MY FACE!" Marcus felt to see if his face really WAS gone. It wasn't of course, this gave him a sign of hope.

"Thew...." Marcus said, still trying to catch his breath. "Fuck you, Pyro-Zi.....Because of him, I got that damn nightmare! I can't wait to beat the SHIT out of him!" Marcus was FUMING. He decided to go check on Pinkie. As he walked into her room, she was there, sleeping like before.

Marcus may had just experienced possibly the worst Nightmare he had ever experienced, but a smile still snuck onto his face. He crouched down, leaned over, and whispered into Pinkie's ear, "Don't worry....I won't hurt you...." He smiled one last time, and then went back to his bed.

After Pinkie heard Marcus' promise, her usual smile when she was asleep, had now grew twice in size. Everything would be okay.....

-----TO BE CONTINUED-----


TROLOLOLOLOLOL back to the show.



.....JUST KIDDING........

Future Endeavors

Once again, all known properties are owned by The World Wrestling Entertainment, Hasbro, Valve, and Comedy Central....

It was another bright and shiny day in Equestria. Day three of the Human invasion had officially begun. Effective today, Ponyville had new Paperboys, it was none other than Kit, Damian, and Tate. Featherweight quit due to his parents becoming too worried about their son getting an injury. So the boys applied for the job, and got it. But since it was only a one seat bike, and not three, a wheelbarrow was attached to the bike so Damian and Tate could come along for the ride. They all had their papers to pass out, and would have to follow the path they were given. They had started at 6:30, and didn't have much more ground to cover.

Marcus Sims stepped out of Sugarcube Corner right when Tate threw one of the newspapers, it smacked him smack dab in the face. "Oops!" Tate yelled, a derpy smile on his face. "Sorry, Marcus!"

Marcus grumbled. "Stupid little fucks...." He picked up the newspaper, and when he stepped back inside Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie Pie was right in his face.

"You shouldn't curse at the children, Marky!" She said, giggling.

"WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET UP?!" Marcus screamed, he was convinced this bitch was watching his every move.

"Oooohhhhh....About 2 seconds ago." She answered with delight.

"What the?! WHAT-" Marcus stammered. "You woke up two seconds ago, and you're fast enough to get right in my Face?!"

"Mmm hmm." Pinkie said, nodded. "Didn't make my bed. The first thing I always do in the morning is say hi to my Friends! HIIIIIII!!!!!!!!" She screamed, causing Marcus' ears-drums to tear a bit.

Marcus sighed loudly. "Hi, Pinkie...."

"HOW ARE YOU?" Pinkie asked, smiling widely.

"A bit annoyed..." Marcus answered with a grunt.

"WHY? WHY? WHY?" She asked, jumping up and down. Marcus' eyes followed her as she went up and down.

"Because....Of...This...." He answered.

"WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO STOP?" She asked thoughtfully.

"If you don't I make you." Marcus threatened. Pinkie immediately stopped. Marcus began skimming through the paper, he stopped when he saw an add in the Help Wanted section that interested him....

"Okay, well, I've gotta go say hello to all my other friends." Pinkie explained, getting ready to walk out. "BYE, MARKY-"

"Pinkie, wait!" Marcus interrupted, causing Pinkie to stop dead in her tracks.

"Yeah?" She asked curiously.

"Do you mind if me and the Guys have a meeting here later today?"

"What kind of meeting?"

"I found a job that We can ALL do." Marcus answered excitedly.

"COOOOOLLLL!" Pinkie said, happy for her friend. "What time will the meeting be?"

"11:00." Marcus answered.

"OKIE DOKIE LOKIE!" Pinkie said happily. "I'll tell all the boys to meet you here at 11:00 today. SEE YAAAAAAA!" With that, Pinkie hopped out of Sugarcube Corner.

Marcus continued to look at the ad. "This is AWESOME, just AWESOME!" He exclaimed.

One hour Later.....

Ponyville Elementary....

Kit, Damian and Tate finished up their newspaper duties earlier than they expected. And due to their new job, not only did they make 5 bits each, they also now were able to drive THEMSELVES to school. Which was good, since their dad had to give CM Punk his ATV back. The boys were even the first ones at School today, instead of close to being late the day before.

After a few Short moments, Apple Bloom arrived at school, and she was of course, glaring a whole through the boys, as the boys were doing in return.

"I can't believe I have to sit by this stupid bully..." Damian complained. Why would he say that out loud?!

"Ah can't believe ah have ta sit by an easily manipulated dummeh...." Apple Bloom retorted.

"I am not a Dummy!" Damian yelled.

A few moments later, Sweetie Belle and Scootloo arrived simultaneously.

"Hey, guys!" Scootaloo said, but the boys acted like they weren't listening.

"Don't even try, Scoots...." Apple Bloom warned. "They hate us now." She frowned.

"Nuh uh!" Sweetie Belle said, not believing. "Damian doesn't hate me! Do you, Damiiiaaannn?"

"I hate ALL bullies." Damian said, crossing his arms. This causes Sweetie Belle to gasp.

"NO! WHY, DAMIAN?!" Sweetie Belle pleaded, grabbing onto Damian's arm on the verge of tears.

"Tate....?" Scootaloo said, approaching Tate. "You don't hate us, do you?"

"Yup." Tate said, blowing a raspberry at Scootaloo. "You're the worst chicken buddy EVER!" Scootaloo gasped, not believing what she had just heard.

"Apple Bloom! WHAT HAPPENED?!" Sweetie Belle yelled.

"Diamond Tiara's gott'em in the palm of her hoof...." Apple Bloom answered.

"WHAT?!" Scootaloo and Apple Bloom exclaimed simultaneously.

"They just figured out what you guys were REALLY about....." Diamond Tiara said, entering the classroom with a flip of her mane.

"What are you talking about?!" Scootaloo demanded.

"What did you do to them!?" Sweetie Belle yelled.

"All DT did was inform us about your Ways." Kit explained. "We never would of expected you three to be Bullies.....But I guess it as too good to be true.

"WE AREN'T BULLIES!" The CMC's said at the same time, except Apple Bloom, who said "Ain't" instead of "Aren't."

"Not only are you bullies...." Diamond Tiara started. "But you're also LIARS!"

"WHAT?!" Sweetie Belle yelled, Scootaloo just kept hitting her head on her desk.

"Go ahead, girls...Be jealous.....I've got a Cutie Mark....And you all DON'T." Diamond teased. "You hate me because my Family is rich. You won't be friends with me. It's all just a sick game to you three...Not caring about anyone's feelings. You should be downright ASHAMED of yourselves!"

"Why you little...." Scootaloo growled, about ready to lunge and tare this Mare's throat out.

"We ain't done NONE of those things ta you!" Apple Bloom cried. "You're the bully here, NOT us!"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk....." Diamond said, shaking her head. "It's over now, girls. I'm done. No matter how you try to bring me down from now on, it won't work....Your words don't hurt me, because I've got friends now.....REAL friends. Friends you don't deserve. And friends you will NEVER have." Damian, Kit and Tate stood by Diamond's side, which sealed the deal.

"Bullying is for......BULLIERS!" Tate said, not knowing what to say.

"Fine.....If that's how ya want it ta be...." Apple Bloom replied, and with that, the CMC's sat down, angry, frustrated, but most importantly....Sad. The worst thing was, the rest of the Class had witnessed the entire event Unfold. But the CMC's didn't care, they had just lost three of their friends....And they weren't sure if they could ever get Them back.

"Where in Equestria is Ms. Cheerilee?!" Diamond Tiara complained. "I need to file a serious bully complaint!" Just then, the door opened, and Ms. Cheerilee walked in, but she had 4 other colts with her. The class looked at the colts with curiosity, while the fattest colt just scowled at them.

"The hell you lookin' at?!" The fat colt said, resulting in numerous gasps from the class.

"Now, now," Ms. Cheerilee replied, trying to calm everyone down. "Class...I am pleased to announce that Today, we have 4 new students who will be joining us." Some of the class groaned, in particular, Diamond Tiara. "More idiots to conquer, I suppose...." Diamond thought to herself.

"Children, please..." Ms. Cheerilee continued. "This is Kyle Broflovski, Stan Marsh, Kenny McCormick, and Eric Cartman." Stan, Kyle and Kenny waved, Cartman just said, "Sup?"

"Boys...Why don't you tell us a little about yourselves?" Ms. Cheerilee suggested.

Cartman cleared his throat. "Alright then.....I'll go first....My name is Eric Cartman....I have a stuffed frog named Clydefrog, a Cat named Misto Kitteh, my favorite food is Cheesy poofs, and last but not least.....Kyle's a Jew." Kyle clenched his hoofs and gritted his teeth in frustration.

"Cartman......SHUT UP." Kyle warned.

"What are you gonna do, Kyle?" Cartman teased. "Hit me with your bag of Jew gold? I THINK NOT."

"Settle down, boys...." Ms. Cheerilee said, rolling her eyes. THIS was going to be hard....

"My name's Kyle Broflovski......And I'm just going to throw it out there. I AM a Jew." Too bad there weren't any Jews in Equestria, so this confused the kids.

"HAHA! JEW!" Cartman teased. Kyle was about to punch Cartman, but he just sighed and continued talking. "And.....I WANT TO KILL CARTMAN....That is all."

"Yeah, he does." Cartman replied, smiling innocently. "I'm going to call the cops on Him."

"That's pretty low, dude..." Stan said. "Anyway, my name is Stan Marsh. And I can hold my Breath underwater longer than anyone else."

"And Stan's not a Jew." Cartman implied.

Finally, Kenny was up, but his speech is muffled, of course, thanks to his jacket, so everything he said was not heard.

"Kenny, sweetie? Don't you think you should take off your jacket...So we can hear your better?" Ms. Cheerilee suggested.

"Kenny's an ugly ass kid." Cartman explained. "So of course he isn't taking his jacket off! I happen to know Kenny better than anyone else....So I will tell you all about him. His family...Is nothing but HICKS. They are poor, and get drunk and punch eachother all night. All Kenny has for dinner every night is a Poptart. And worst of all.....He is addicted to cat urine. Ain't that right, Kenny?" Kenny nodded, and shrugged.

"Wow..." Diamond Tiara thought. "Looks like him and Apple Bloom would get along quite well. Except for the cat pee part....Unless of course Apple Bloom's into that." She then cringed.

"Ummm....Thank you boys..." Ms. Cheerile said, her eyes bugged out. "That was....Nice.....You 4 can sit way in the back, next to Twist." The boys nodded, and went to the very back. The order of seating went Kenny, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and then unfortunately....Twist.

The first thing Cartman said to Twist was, "Hey! You're a Ginger! Just like Kyle!"

Twist was confused. "Whaths a Ginger?" She asked.

Cartman began to laugh uncontrollably. "OH WOW! SHE'S GOT A LISP, TOO! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!! LOOK GUYS, SHE'S GOT A LISP! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Ms. Cheerilee just facehoofed. This. Was. Going. To. Suck....


A few Hours later....

Sugarcube Corner.....

The meeting was about to begin. Pinkie got everyone over to Sugarcube Corner in record time. Chairs were lined up in a circle in the corner, that way none of the customers could hear the guys talking.

"So, Marky...." Punk began. "What's this meeting about?"

"YEAH! WHAT'S IT ABOUT? HUH! HUH!" Pinkie said hopping up and down.

"This is kind of....Private, Pinkie." Freddie said. "So if you could just...."

"Fuck off, Pinkie." Marcus said flatly. Pinkie couldn't be hurt by words, so she just smiled and hopped off.

"That was pretty harsh..." Nova said. "You're a total dick...." Marcus just waved the insult off. After all, he was used to it.

"Let's cut to the chase, Guys..." Marcus began. "I was looking in the paper today, and found a Job that is PERFECT for all of us!" This made everyone else quite curious.

"What is it, dude?" Austin asked. He needed a job, anyway.

Marcus smiled widely, which he didn't do often. This HAD to of been special.... ".....Wrestlers." He answered.

"Damn, dude." Freddie replied. "I never thought of that. It's something we love to do....And something that pays a shit load of Money!"

"Right." Marcus continued. "There's a wrestling Camp RIGHT HERE in Ponyville, too!"

"Hell yeah! Let's do it!" Punk said excitedly. "I'm gonna get some more Gold around this waist!"

"Me and Ze are gonna pass on this, guys." Nova said.

"What?" Austin said, flabbergasted. "What are you talking about, Nova?!"

"Tell 'em, Ze...." Nova said.

"Ze and James have come to the conclusion...." Ze began. "That.....WE SUCK AT WRESTLING."

"Oh no shit...." Marcus said. "Everyone in existence fucking knew that." Ze and Nova nodded, any other time they wouldn't have, though....

"You guys SURE you don't wanna be a Wrestler?"

"Ze's answer is final. And so is James'." Ze replied, Nova nodded.

"Well, all right then." Marcus replied.

"Hey, I think I have an idea about this new Job of ours..." Freddie blurted out.

"What is it?" Punk asked.

"Well..." Freddie began. "If Ze and Nova are out, we should recruit two other people to Join us at Wrestling camp...."

"Good idea, Freddie." Austin said, impressed. "But who?"

Freddie smiled. "I have the perfect ponies in mind...."

Meanwhile....

Cloudsdale....

Rainbow Dash should have been controlling the clouds, but, as usual, she was slacking off, lounging back in a cloud, of course. Everything was peaceful....Until a random flying letter smacked her in the face.

"WHOA! WHAT THE?" Rainbow Dash screamed, taken off guard. "A letter.....To me?" She then smirked. "Must be some more Fanmail...." She then began to read the Letter.

Dear Rainbow Dash,

Meet me at the Cave by the Everfree Forest in one hour.

Sincerely, Your Secret Admirer.....XoXo.

I guess you could say, it was Fanmail....

---------TO BE CONTINUED---------

Soft Core

Rainbow Dash's eyes nearly fell out of her skull. If you were to describe her spot-on reaction to what she had just read, shocked, surprised, and nervous just wouldn't cut it.

"I....Have a....Secret Admirer?" Rainbow Dash barely was able to choke out, due to her shock. "Uuuuhhhhhh..........." She was speechless, for once. "How can I have a Secret Admirer? I'm not exactly....Girlfriend material...." Rainbow Dash did not in ANY way have self confidence problems, the mare was just well aware she wasn't the.....Prettiest pony. She usually focused on her flying, her job as Cloud coordinator, and dreaming of becoming a member of The Wonderbolts. All of this combined took up all of her time, therefore she had no time to make herself look....Approachable. Not that she wanted to be ogled over by all the colts, she just sometimes wanted to be noticed by her opposite sex. Sometimes, when she is talking to Colts, she would get the impression that they thought she was a Colt herself....Must've been the Mullet. But now, she had gotten a letter from her supposed "secret admirer". There was a colt in Ponyville that was attracted to her mullet! A colt that liked her due to the fact she didn't try to make herself noticeable. Or....Maybe they just thought she was bad-ass.

Either way, this was a great opportunity...And one this mare would NOT pass up. Rainbow Dash smiled. "Hey....Maybe it's Sniper!" Rainbow said out loud. She had not heard that same giant sound that symbolized Team BLU's arrival, but she was asleep....So she might've missed it. She thought about Sniper. Rainbow liked him, she knew it....But she was too afraid to admit it. And if Sniper himself would admit it, she would gladly do the same.

"OhmygoshohmygoshohmygoshOHMYGOSH!" Rainbow squealed in delight. "I'm gonna have a BOYFRIEND!" Rainbow would wait for an hour, without sleeping of course, because she would slumber this opportunity away if she slept.

Sugarcube Corner.....

"So...Let me get this straight..." Marcus Sims replied to Freddie's statement. "You want to bring Rainbow Dash and Applejack to Wrestling school with us?"

"Well....Yeah." Freddie repeated. "RD said her favorite sport is wrestling, she might as Well have a hand at it. And Applejack said she'd love to become one herself. Plus, it says in the Ad, if we bring two mares with us, 2 of us get FREE training!"

Marcus nodded. "Sounds good. But, we each need 200 bits to train...Who has that much fucking dough?" He said this sarcastically, of course, and continually looked at the Bag of bits Freddie was holding while he was saying it.

"Hmmm....I wonder..." Freddie said, looking at his bits as well. "Oh! How about you, big man?" He gestured to Ryback. Ryback just glared at him.

"Me and Ryback have nothing on us, Freddie." Austin replied.

"Then I guess no training for us." Freddie retorted. The guys just looked at him like she wanted to kill him. "Fine....I'll pay for all of you jackasses. I'll get a BUNCH of more bits after I become big!" He smirked confidently.

"Why in the world do we need TRAINING anyway?" Punk said, rolling his eyes. "For shit's sakes, we did this combined for 49 years!"

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Brooks..." Marcus replied. "We have FOUR legs now, not two arms and two legs. This shit just got all fucked up!"

"How hard could it Be?" Punk said, crossing his front hooves. "I say we go speak to the promoter in charge, and DEMAND to be signed ON THE SPOT. And to NOT be brought down to developmental! We DESERVE to be on the Main Stage right NOW."

"Nice emotion there, dude..." Freddie applauded. "Who runs the promotion, anyway?" He asked curiously.

"The ad doesn't Say." Marcus answered. "But I'm sure he's MUCH better than the guy who runs WWE..." He smirked.

"Yeah...That guy sucks." Freddie said, he soon gasped, though. "Hey, that's me you FUCK!!!"

"Oops...." Marcus said, snickering. "My mistake...."

"If I had your contract with Me, I'd rip it up right now..." Freddie threatened.

"And I'd rip up your mom's Contract." Marcus retorted.

"My wife doesn't want to fuck a PONY!" Freddie yelled.

"Settle down, sweethearts..." Punk intervened. Marcus and Freddie hmphed in response.

"When does training start?" Austin asked.

"The ad says in one week." Marcus answered.

"Well, good luck, guys...." Nova said. "But me and Ze actually found a job for ourselves."

"Professional gays?" Punk asked with a gasp.

"Porn Stars?" Freddie asked.

"Stuntmen?" Austin asked.

"....My own personal Bitches?" Marcus asked with a snicker.

"FUCK NO, FUCK NOO, no, and FUCKING ULTRA FUCK NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Nova screamed.

"Although Ze thinks being a Stuntman would be cool." Ze replied.

"Oh hell yeah." Nova said, hoof-bumping Ze. "But still no....We actually signed up to become Ponyville Elementary's new Gym Coach tandem!" Nova and Ze grinned widely, and expected their friends to give them congratulations, but instead, what they got.....Was laughter. Hell, even Ryback chuckled!

"Those poor bastards..." Marcus said, wiping tears from his eyes.

"You'd better not get gay with My kids...." Freddie warned.

"Well, Ze and James aren't exactly Gay....Soooo....Ze believes that is out of the question." Ze replied, rolling his eyes.

"You motherfuckers should be happy for us!" Nova whined. "This job is PERFECT! We get to yell........"

"Ze enjoys yelling." Ze said smiling.

"EXACTLY!" Nova replied.

"Those children will eat you ALIVE." Austin said.

"Ze believes we are too big to eat." Ze replied blinking.

Austin facehoofed. "It's a figure of speech...."

"Yes, well....Ze thinks that you look even uglier without that Eyepatch!" Ze retorted. Austin immediately stood up from his seat, glaring at Ze.

"Oohhhhhh..." Freddie teased. "You're both FUCKED."

".......TO THE INVISIBLE BOAT-MOBILE!" Nova yelled, and then him and Ze ran out of Sugarcube Corner as fast as they could.

"Bastards..." Austin mumbled.

One hour Later.....

The Everfree Cave.....

It was one hour, on the DOT. Rainbow Dash had gotten there in perfect time....Which she wasn't used to doing. From in the Air, she could only see one other soul There....And if she was there for why she THOUGHT she was there....Rainbow Dash's mind would be fucked beyond belief. She landed on the ground, and the mare was looking right back at her with the same sweet Smile she always had.

"....Fluttershy....?" Rainbow Dash stammered. "Oh HELL no...." She thought to herself.

Rainbow Dash stared at Fluttershy in a very shocked manner. She had received a letter from her secret admirer that had gestured her towards the cave close to the Everfree Forest. Fluttershy was without a doubt, the equivalent of a scaredy-cat in Ponyville. She was afraid of her own shadow, for crying out loud. But nothing perhaps scared her more than the Everfree Forest.....And that INCLUDED the dark and eerie cave that was placed deep within the Forest. Why would Fluttershy be anywhere near this location, of all places? Because there was NO WAY she was the one who wrote that letter....No way.....

"Oh, hi, Rainbow Dash...." Fluttershy said in her usual sweet but soft manner. "I'm glad you came."

"Hi, Fluttershy." Rainbow Dash replied nervously. "I sure hope you're here because you were sleepwalking or something...."

Fluttershy shook her head. "Oh no, Rainbow Dash....Nothing like that...."

"Then.....Why are you here?" Rainbow asked, hopefully she wouldn't give her the answer she thought.

Fluttershy was a bit confused. "What do you mean? You got my letter...Didn't you?"

Rainbow Dash couldn't believe it. "That was YOUR letter?" She was barely able to ask.

"I know what you are thinking..." Fluttershy replied, talking even quieter now. "Yes, I wrote that letter....And everything I wrote.....Was true."

"What are you saying....?" Rainbow Dash asked, shocked beyond belief.

"I would've told you before..." Fluttershy began. "But....I feared you would turn me down....Or make fun of me....Plus, I'm so shy....That-"

Rainbow Dash interrupted her. "Fluttershy....Cut to the chase. Do you have a crush on me?" She demandingly asked.

Fluttershy was quiet, and wouldn't say a word. All she could do was look at the ground. "FLUTTERSHY......TELL ME." Rainbow demanded once again, her tone much higher now.

Fluttershy announced in the lightest whisper that had ever escaped her mouth, "...Yes..." It was barely audible, but Rainbow Dash could still hear it.

All Rainbow could do at this point, was sigh. She did not expect Fluttershy of all ponies, to like her. "Go ahead.....I know I don't have a chance...." Fluttershy retorted, backing away.

This was too crazy for Dash to take, but still, she gave Fluttershy a supporting smile. "Hold on, Fluttershy.....Let's talk about this."

Fluttershy gasped. "You...Want to....." She then gulped. "....Talk?"

Dash nodded. "Of course. Yeah, this is extra weird, but I'm your friend, and I want you to tell me what attracted these feelings...."

"I....I can't....." Fluttershy squeaked out.

"Why not?" Dash asked, raising an eyebrow.

".....You.....You wouldn't understand...." Fluttershy choked out, barely able to look Rainbow Dash in the eye.

"You're right....." Dash replied. "I definitely DON'T understand. But if we could talk about this....Maybe I could get a better understanding of your feelings..." She smiled.

Fluttershy sighed. "Animals aren't the only things I love, you know.....I wasn't sure at first, but now I realize....I've found something I love more than all the animals in the World...."

Rainbow Dash KNEW where this was going, but she would ask anyway. "What would that be?"

Fluttershy blushed. "You....." Dash groaned. "Ever since Flight School, when you stood up for me when I wasn't that good of a flyer, I thought you were....So cool. That's all it was at first, because I didn't feel the type of feelings I do now back then. And your Sonic Rainboom, it allowed me to gain my Cutie Mark...It allowed me to love Animals. I am forever committed to your Talents, Rainbow Dash...."

"I'm not sure how to respond to that...." Dash replied.

"I understand." Fluttershy replied. "As we grew older.....These feelings started building up inside me. I couldn't tell what they were, but they gave me the nudge....To get closer to you....Anyway I could. But I couldn't do that, because of my shyness. And it got even worse as I got older.....I was becoming a bit more socially active as Time went on, but I still wasn't brave enough to release my feelings to you......And that's what attracts me to you, Rainbow Dash....You're nothing like me. You are the bravest pony I've ever met, you have the confidence that I don't have. Sometimes...I feel like I'm too nice, a doormat, in other words. But you? You're nice when it's necessary, but when the Time comes, you can be a little rotten....I wish I could do that." Fluttershy noticed Rainbow Dash still wasn't following.

"I know I'm telling you all of this when you least expected it..." Fluttershy continued. "But just today, I got the courage to pour my heart out to you.....I-I like you, Rainbow Dash.....As a friend, yes. But....I also would like to take it to the next Level.....You are the polar opposite of me....And that's what attracts me to you. Not only that, but I find your mullet to be.....LOVELY." Rainbow Dash still just stood there, her mouth agape. She had no words, once again, but it also felt like her body had shut down on her. She couldn't move a muscle.

"But, you know....If you don't want what I want....Then-Then that's okay, too...." Fluttershy said, looking down at the ground. "We can still be Friends...But I just want you to know....That my attraction to you will NEVER go away......You're special, Rainbow Dash. In a good way....But, I'm sure you already knew this."

"......No, I didn't..." Rainbow Dash finally replied quietly.

"What was that?" Fluttershy asked.

"I didn't know I was special, Fluttershy...." Rainbow Dash replied. "Everytime I try to get a Colt, ya know, as a Boyfriend, they tell me....That they....That they think I'm a colt...." Fluttershy gasped.

"Yeah, I'm fast and all, and Loyal and all that stuff I've heard before....But Fluttershy.....I'm not special....I'm just.....I'm just an Ugly mare....With a ugly Hairstyle....Who looks like a Colt...." Rainbow Dash truly believed these words. They stung, but she believed in them. "How could you be attracted to Me....When noone else is?" At that statement, Rainbow Dash felt a tear run down her cheek. Yup, this day was sucking.....

Fluttershy trotted over to Rainbow Dash. "You want to know why I'm attracted to you? It's because I have real emotions......Something those colts obviously don't have. I respect you You look nothing like a Colt....In my eyes, you look like a Breath-taking Mare. My heart skips a beat everytime I see you....I smile everytime you make your presence. To even make a pun....Rainbow Dash.....You make my body Flutter with excitement. You put the Flutter....In Fluttershy....When I see you flying over my Cottage every day....I realize that Angels DO exist. You aren't ugly, nor is your hair, your personality is Admirable.....Rainbow Dash....Listen to me when I tell you....No part of your Anatomy is Ugly. Noone is perfect, but the closest thing to it....Would be you." Fluttershy could have gone on and all day, but her words were halted by a light kiss from Rainbow Dash.

"You know....For such a shy pony, you can't Shut up when talking about your feelings." Rainbow Dash said, giggling.

"I'm SO sorry..." Fluttershy apologized, blushing. "I could just...Talk about you forever." The two mares looked deep into eachother's eyes, each acquiring feelings they never knew they had.

"Yeah? Well, talk is cheap....Let me teach you how to shut up a bit...."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7aDBgUUs3A

Meanwhile....

Kyle, Stan, Kenny and Cartman wandered through the Everfree Forest. Yes, school was about 3 hours away from being over, but, lucky for them, they were kicked out. All they had done was terrorize the class. They farted, burped, mooned, referenced how large their boners were, cussed...Need I go on? There favorite cuss word of the day happened to be Bitch. EVERYONE in class was a Bitch. Kyle and Stan mumbled how Ms. Cheerilee was a bitch, which she couldn't hear of course, but Cartman? Some would say...He was a bit braver. He flat-out, right in front of his teacher's face, called her a Bitch. He even spelled it out on the chalkboard. THAT was the last straw, they were thrown out after that.

But, before that, Cartman called Twist a quote, "No souled Ginger with an endless supply of Saliva." That's ONE foal sent to the Counselor's office because of uncontrollable crying...Fred Fredburger was a "Retarded bitch." TWO foals sent to the Counselor's office. Dinky Hooves was a "Fucked up eyes Bitch." THREE foals sent to the counselor's office. Apple Bloom was a "Hillbilly bitch." But she didn't cry, because she was tough enough. Sweetie Belle was "A cum-colored bitch with a Head boner." She didn't cry either, though...Probably because she didn't have a clue what these words meant. Scootaloo was "A chicken Shit who ate bitches for Breakfast." Scootaloo didn't cry either, of course....She did threaten to hurt them all, though, like THAT would stop them. The boys had been getting along with Damian, Kit and Tate. They said they were just like them, and the boys thanked the four for taking the CMC's down a notch. But, all signs of friendship Between them were blown up, when Cartman called Diamond Tiara a "Pink bitch with a skunk Stripe in her mane." Stan than told her she should "Stick that shiny piece of Crap on her head up her Ass." Diamond Tiara didn't cry either, she was a bitch Filly, so she one upped all four of them by consecutively kicking them in the nuts.

"I can't believe that Skunk bitch kicked me in the balls!" Cartman complained.

"You called her a bitch, fatass!" Kyle retorted.

"I'M NOT FAT I'M BIG BONED!" Cartman yelled.

Kenny mumbled something inaudible, but the boys used their magical "I can hear Muffled ponies" powers to understand him perfectly.

"She kicked you cuz you're poor, Kenny." Stan answered.

"Shut the fuck up, dude." Kenny mumbled.

"Anyway, atleast we're out of school Now..." Kyle said, looking on the bright side. "But my parents are going to KILL me! And I didn't even do anything!"

"Well, that's what you get for hanging out with bad friends, Jew boy..." Cartman teased.

"You aren't my friend, Fatty." Kyle replied.

"YEAH I AM, KIEL!" Cartman yelled. "We make fun of Eachother all day! You're mah friend...GET OVER IT!"

"He's right, dude...." Stan added.

"Shut up, Stan..." Kyle growled. All of a sudden, the four boys heard some annoying sucking noises close to them.

"...The fuck is that?" Cartman said in an annoyed matter. The four boys peaked around the corner of the Cave, and saw Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy kissing. Not making out, just kissing eachother ever so delicately.

"HOLY SHIT, DUDE!" Stan silently screamed. If the two Mares heard them eavesdropping on their kissing, who knows what would happen?

Cartman laughed, but not as loud so Dash and Fluttershy heard. He pulled out a camera, from seemingly out of nowhere.

"Where the hell'd you get that, dude?" Kenny mumbled.

"Probably pulled it out of his Fat-ass." Kyle said, chuckling.

"No, Kiel!" Cartman shouted quietly. "Only the morons going into prison do That!" Kyle just rolled his eyes.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, DUDE?" Stan cried as Cartman looked like he was about to take a picture.

"The hell's it look Like? I'm capturing the Moment!" Cartman replied. Then, in a Flash (PUN!), the Lens clicked. The two mares were so entranced by the kiss, the never even noticed what would have been a blinding flash in their Eyes.

"SWWWEEETTTT." Cartman slowly said in delight. He then started to shake the Polaroid picture.

"What are you gonna do with that, dude?" Stan asked curiously.

Cartman was about to answer, but the boys were interrupted by the presence...Of Pyro-Zi.

"Hello, little foals..." Pyro-Zi said with a disturbing grin.

"HOLY SHIT! WHO ARE YOU?!" Kyle yelled quietly.

Pyro-Zi frowned. "You do not know who I am?" The four boys just shook their heads. "I....Am Emperor Pyro-Zi."

"The hell you want, Emperor Ass-cheeks?" Cartman boldly said.

Pyro-Zi raised an eyebrow. "I can kill you, so I'd watch your filthy Pony mouth if I were you...." Cartman gulped, and finally shut his mouth. "What are you four doing on MY property?" He demanded.

"Cartman was spying on....Those two." Stan answered, gesturing around the corner. Pyro-Zi looked, and what he saw....Made him nearly squeal in Delight.

"OH YES!" Pyro-Zi quietly screamed. "What a simply MARVELOUS revelation! Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.....ARE LOVERS!"

"Hell yeah, dude!" Cartman replied happily. "And I've got the proof to go with it!" He showed Pyro-Zi the picture, and Pyro-Zi's grin now grew three-fold.

"I NEED this picture, boys...." Pyro-Zi said, almost in a pleading way. Which he NEVER did.

"No way, asshole!" Cartman said, forcefully grabbing the Picture back.

Pyro-Zi still had an idea, though, in a last minute attempt, he grabbed Kenny. Kenny immediately yelped, sending his friends into a gasp.

"Let him go, dude!" Stan pleaded.

"Yeah, yeah....Here's the picture, even!" Cartman said, quickly handing the picture over to Pyro-Zi. Success....Pyro-Zi smirked, but instead of putting Kenny down, he used full force, and twisted the poor Boy's neck. Survival from such strength...Was not possible. Upon twisting the boys neck, Pyro-Zi then let him go, and all Kenny's lifeless body could do, was fall to the ground with a thud.

"Thank you for the Picture, boys..." Pyro-Zi cackled, and then walked away. He didn't know how he would be able to get back into his Lair, though, since Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy would notice either him or the door opening, so he would just have to wait it out.

Kyle, Cartman and Stan's mouth were dropped almost to their feet. They just witnessed their friend die...Right in front of their very eyes.....

"Oh my God...." Stan quietly stammered. "They...They killed Kenny..."

"You.....You bastard...." Kyle added. The boys wouldn't move, they lost their best friend....In the span of a Minute, a random purple guy arrived, watched two Mares kiss, stole a photograph, and kill Kenny McCormick....

Cartman was the saddest of all. Kyle and Stan placed their hooves on his shoulders, and kept repeating it would be all right. "My.....MY PHOTO....." Was all Cartman could say as a reply. "It's.....IT'S....GONE..."

Kyle immediately snapped. "WHAT?! Kenny's dead, and all you can think about is that damn Photo!?"

"Well, YEAH! I was going to use that to Jack off!" Cartman cried. Kyle just growled ferociously, and kicked Cartman in the balls as hard as he could. Cartman crumpled to the ground, and even coughed up some blood.

"YOU BASTARD, CARTMAN! YOU BASTARD!" Kyle yelled, and then walked off.

Stan could admit, what Cartman said was BEYOND douchey, but still...That was Cartman. Just like Pinkie was so full of life...Cartman was so...Full of asshole remarks. Kyle knew this better than anybody, he just couldn't accept it. Stan helped the ball-hurt Cartman up.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID HE DO THAT FOR?!" Cartman demanded to know.

"Because, dude....You cared more about that Photo than Kenny..." Stan answered.

"Well, yeah I did!" Cartman said as a matter-of-factly. "I don't jack off to Kenny! I jack off to hot pony pictures!" Stan just sighed, and walked off. "That doesn't mean I don't miss Kenny, though! Wait up, guys!" Cartman trotted off after his long gone friends.

And while all of this was Happening.....Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were STILL kissing eachother ever so sweetly....And Pyro-Zi was getting it ALL on tape....

--------TO BE CONTINUED---------

Conference Call

Rainbow Dash hoped she wasn't late. Even with all of her might, she STILL fell asleep after reading her Secret Admirer's letter, and when she woke up, she noticed that she was 45 minutes late. Oh shit did she panic.....She had hoped that Sniper, or whoever this person was, was still there, for Rainbow had a short temper, and someone would end up Dead if her short fuse was lit.

She arrived at the cave, and landed on the Ground. She saw noone, which was a bad sign....She went around the cave, looking to see if anyone was there. Of course, noone was. Activate: Fury Mode. Rainbow started cussing up a storm, the curse words flew freely from her mouth as all of her pent up anger was released. She noticed that next to her, on the ground....Was the now deceased Kenny McCormick. Rainbow checked his pulse, and her hypothesis was correct, he was dead. Not to mention, some flies were already piled onto him, Rainbow swatted the flies away from the body, and preceded to stomp Kenny's skull in. She was truly pissed off beyond belief, and whoever played this joke on her would suffer dearly. Kenny's brain stuck to Rainbow's cyan hooves, and all she had to do to get the slimy matter off was drag her hooves in the grass.

After all of her anger had vented, she finally came back to reality, and the old Rainbow Dash was back. "Oh crap...." Rainbow said, gasping at the damage she had done to Kenny.

"Oh my gosh, little dude.....I'm....So sorry...." She said sadly, tears beginning to form in her eyes. Her anger took over, and she unleashed it all out on Kenny, something Rainbow Dash would NEVER do if she wasn't pissed.

"I wonder how he died..." Rainbow Dash thought to herself. "Probably a manticore or something....Fuck those creepy things...."

Rainbow Dash didn't know this foal, as he had just moved to Ponyville the day before, but she cared enough to give him a proper burial. She immediately began clawing at the dirt with her own hooves, something she wasn't afraid to do because she didn't care about her appearance. After a while, she had created a hole big enough to create an entire pile of dirt next to her. She went over to Kenny, and instead of picking him up with her teeth, which was considered disrespectful towards the non-living, she nudged the dead foal over to the grave, brain and all. After Kenny was nussled perfectly inside, she placed all the dirt next to her in it's original spot. Obviously she didn't know the foal's parents, so she could not tell them that their son had died, which means a proper burial ceremony was not possible.

A few of Rainbow Dash's tears fell off her chin, and landed in the dirt, it only took a few seconds for them to dissolve. Rainbow Dash saluted the dead foal.

"Rest in Peace, little dude...." Rainbow said sadly. "And I promise you, if I find out who...Or what killed you...I'll return the favor...Just for you." She smiled, and took off to the sky once again, meaning every word of her promise.

Unfortunately, though....Pyro-Zi saw and heard everything....He had just installed security cameras and sound amplifiers around his base when he woke up. They were impossible to see, as they were far too small, but the high amount of Onceria energy they were made with, made them extremely reliable.

"So...." Pyro-Zi began, tapping his two index fingers together. "A little pony thinks she can Kill me?" He then chuckled. "FOOL!" He slammed his fists onto the arm rests of the chair, which made it vibrate.

"We will worry about her execution later..." PZ-1 said, who had just now transformed from his temporary Fluttershy body, into his original form. "For now....We have a form of humiliation!"

"That is correct...." The temporary Rainbow Dash, PZ-4 added, handing the picture of the kissing Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy to Pyro-Zi. Pyro-Zi once again chuckled at the contents of the Polaroid.

"Both of you did a good job..." Pyro-Zi congratulated the clones. "I was going to take the picture myself, but those 4 little ones made my job a whole lot easier." He then looked at the picture again, and gagged. "I just wish they had better technology in this Dimension. I mean, a Polaroid? My god, Onceria left that type of Camera in the dust EONS ago!"

"I agree....It's revolting." PZ-1 said.

"Speaking of revolting...." Pyro-Zi continued. "Why did you two ham it up so?"

The two clones were confused. "What do you mean?" PZ-4 asked.

Pyro-Zi sighed. "All we needed was a simple picture, not a bunch of sickening Dialogue! You two went on FOREVER! It almost makes me question your sexuality!"

"Well, we WERE playing lesbians...." PZ-1 replied.

"Yes, I know." Pyro-Zi scowled. "But you went on and on about your Feelings! Are you two gay yourselves?"

PZ-1 raised an eyebrow. "Are YOU gay?"

"Of course I'm not!" Pyro-Zi shouted. "But I do not know what that has to do with any-" He was about to yell some more, but he then realized that they were clones of him. If Pyro-Zi was straight, they would be straight too. "Oh....I see..." He then blushed a bit from embarrassment.

"Maybe we did get a bit carried away out there with out words..." PZ-1 noted. "Especially me....I was just....Into the Moment, I suppose."

Pyro-Zi nodded in understanding. "It's fine. It was a stellar performance, non-the-less. It was pretty impressive that you came up with all of your lines on the Spot, PZ-1."

"I actually researched my lines." PZ-1 said, confidently smirking.

"You mean.....You're lines were factual?" Pyro-Zi asked in a shocked way.

"Why, yes." PZ-1 answered. "As you had learned, these ponies star in a Television Show....So, to further our studies, we looked them up on on the Internet, since we were sure the humans who enjoy the show wrote profiles about them, and sure enough, they did."

"Why, of course!" Pyro-Zi exclaimed in glee. He completely forgot that he could search up information on his enemies. "Instead of spying on the ponies, and running the risk of getting caught, we can use the Internet to learn about what we are up against!"

PZ-1 and PZ-4 traded evil smiles with eachother, while Pyro-Zi motioned for his Computer to wake up, and it did, of course.

"Computer...." Pyro-Zi began stating his demand. "Tell me EVERYTHING important there is to know about Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash...." As soon as his sentence was done, the computer started beeping and booping.

"Calculating Data...." The machine replied. "Information found!"

"Excellent..." Pyro-Zi said, rubbing his hands together.

"I suggest you take a multitude of notes, Emperor." The computer suggested, Pyro-Zi just smiled wryly.

"Oh, trust me.....I WON'T forget this information." Pyro-Zi replied, and then capped it off with his signature evil laugh, which sooner or later, PZ-1 and PZ-4 joined in on.

A few Hours later.....

Ponyville Elementary.....

The bell rang, meaning that another school day was Over. Besides more arguing between Diamond Tiara and her new "friends", and the Cutie Mark Crusaders, which resulted in Scootaloo being put in timeout, the day was pretty uneventful. The Cutie Mark Crusaders said nothing, instead they trotted out of School as quick as they could before another Altercation left Diamond Tiara with a bloody nose. Yup, Scootaloo was getting to that phase in violence, and really, who could blame her? When people get the opportunity to deck their enemies, they should take it!

"I can tell those bullies want to punch me...." Diamond Tiara said, frowning. "I did nothing to them and they want to punch me!"

"Don't worry, DT...." Kit said reassuringly. "We won't let them hurt you!"

"Yeah!" Damian added. "Noone hurts out friends!"

As usual, Tate didn't know what to say, so he decided to copy his brother's words. "Yeah! Noone hurts our friends!" He said, resulting in a facehoof from his brothers.

"Thanks, you guys...." Diamond Tiara said, smiling warmly. "I'm so glad I have friends like you....."

"So are we, DT." Kit said, returning the warm smile.

Just then, Applejack and Freddie stepped into the entrance of the School, neither of them had happy looks, until Freddie spotted the cutest little mare he had ever seen....It was Diamond Tiara, but he didn't know that at the time. Even if she DID have a big DIAMOND TIARA on her head......DUMBASS.

"Hi, dad!" Tate said excitedly. "We're ready to go home!"

"Actually....." Freddie replied. "You think you guys could use your bike to Get home? I've got some....Business to take care of."

The boys exchanged looks, and shrugged. "Alright, pops..." Damian said. "See ya later!" Freddie waved at his sons as they went off, leaving Diamond Tiara all alone with an angry father and Sister. Applejack told Apple Bloom the same thing about business, and told her to wait outside the school until she and Freddie were done.

Freddie continued to smile at Diamond Tiara. "Well, hi, sweetie. Do you know where Ms. Cheerilee is?"

Diamond Tiara put on her cutest smile. "She said she would be back shortly. She told me to stay after class. Something about a Student/Teacher/Parent conference."

Freddie's good mood immediately disintegrated when he realized he was here to scold THIS cute little thing. "Wait....YOU'RE Diamond Tiara?" He said, shocked.

"Why, yes, Mr. Hediger." Diamond Tiara said sweetly, it melted Freddie's heart. "I thought the Tiara on my head was a dead giveaway." She gestured to her head accessory, and the sound of "DOH!" immediately played in Freddie's mind.

Diamond Tiara noticed that Applejack had been glaring at her since she walked in. She decided to soften her up a bit. "Hi, Applejack!" She said sweetly. "How is Sweet Apple Acres going?"

"It'd be filled with a lot less Drama if you weren't around, lil' missy...." Applejack stated, still glaring at Diamond Tiara.

Just then, Ms. Cheerilee came back, and noticed everyone was already here. "Oh! Hello Applejack, Mr. Hediger. So glad you could make it! Have, a seat, please." She gestured towards the desks, and immediately, Freddie was skeptical. He was sure Applejack could fit in one of these desks, but for God's sake! Freddie is 32 years old!

Freddie tried to sit in the desk, but it was a tight squeeze. A REALLY tight squeeze. Diamond Tiara knew this was a great opportunity to get on Freddie's good side.

"Let me help you, Mr. Hediger." Diamond said, placing her front Hooves on Freddie's arm, and pulling him out of the tight Desk.

"Awwww! Aren't you just sweet?" Freddie said, patting Diamond Tiara's mane. On the outside, she was smiling sweetly, but on the inside, she was grinning evilly. She had Freddie in the palm of her hoof.

"Let's get started, shall we?" Ms. Cheerilee suggested.

"Ah agree....Lets." Applejack sad, still glaring at Diamond Tiara.

"Well," Ms. Cheerilee began. "Diamond Tiara, Applejack and Mr. Hediger have informed me that their sons and Sister have been arguing since last night."

"Oh, that's AWFUL!" Diamond Tiara exclaimed, frowning. "What seems to be the problem?"

"The problem is you, missy!" Applejack said, raising her tone. "You dun caused a rift between my sister, and Freddie's sons! I'd like ta know wha you think you can't jest go around, ruining friendships! It ain't right, It ain't right!"

"Now, hold on, Applejack." Freddie said, placing a hoof on her shoulder to calm her Down. "How can this adorable little Thing be so cruel? It's not possible."

"She's foolin' ya, Freddie!" Applejack exclaimed. "Hay, she'd fool every last one'a us if she had the chance!"

"I hate to interrupt..." Ms. Cheerile intervened. "But Diamond Tiara is an absolute angel in Class. I have never noticed her doing anything wrong."

"I knew it! HA HA!" Freddie said, smiling. "This precious thing couldn't have caused such an Uproar!"

"In fact..." Ms. Cheerile continued. "It was Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle who were the ones who tore into Diamond Tiara in class today. And Freddie's sons came to her rescue."

Diamond Tiara pouted. "That's right. I was just trying to further my Education, because that's what school is about. But then those three started yelling at me!"

"Awwww...." Freddie cooed. "I'm sorry, sweetie...."

"Then why in the hay was those Boys callin' mah sister a Bully?" Applejack retorted. "Apple Bloom ain't a bully! She's a doll!"

"That's right." Ms. Cheerilee said, nodding. "Her and Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle are also well behaved in class. It was just today....They seemed very angry."

"Actually..." Diamond Tiara interrupted. "Oh, nevermind....I shouldn't say anything...." She just looked at the floor.

"What is it, darling?" Freddie said curiously.

"I promised I wouldn't say anything...." Diamond Tiara said plainly, not taking her eyes off of the ground.

"Diamond Tiara....You should ALWAYS let somepony know when something in bothering you." Ms. Cheerilee suggested.

"Well.....Alright..." Diamond Tiara gave in. "In class, those girls don't bother me...But outside, during recess...."

"What is it?" Freddie asked, worried.

"...Outside is when the bullying begins." Diamond Tiara said, some tears forming. "I think it might be jealousy, or maybe it's just a rotten Attitude....But those three girls are so mean! I have to sit alone during recess, sad, depressed.....Because those three told everypony to stay away from me. Because my family is richer than them....They call me rich girl all recess long...And they DON'T STOP. And noone is there to defend me.....And noone would, because those three make me seem like I'm bad or something, but I'm not!"

"Do they hurt you, Diamond Tiara?" Ms. Cheerilee asked, her mouth agape.

"Only with words..." Diamond Tiara confessed, beginning to sob a bit. "They say, since my family is so rich, I should just go to private school so they never have to see my stupid face again. It wouldn't hurt so much....If I had somepony as a friend, to help ease the pain...."

"You seem to be getting along with Freddie's sons." Ms. Cheerilee added.

"Oh yes, they're so kind." Diamond Tiara continued. "You see, my old friend, Silverspoon just moved away a few weeks ago.....When she was around, they teased both of us, that's the Reason her family moved away, to get away from the bullying. But then, that leaves me....All alone, with noone to comfort me. When Spoon was here, we could both comfort eachother, make eachother feel better.....We were eachother's only hope. And then, she was gone...." Diamond Tiara started to sob a bit, making Freddie just want to hug her.

"And then yesterday, was my lucky day....." She then started to smile, but the tears were still in her eyes. "Damian, Kit and Tate came to school. I was only able to become friends with Kit, at first, because those girls had already drilled the lies into Damian and Tate's head. That was, until recess...When they all three saw me getting bullied. They told the girls to leave me alone, and so they did.....And then I told them all everything I'm saying right now. And they promised...They would be my friend, and they would comfort me. And it appears our friendship did a number on those three, because today, they left us alone....Outside, atleast. But they just yelled in class...."

"You poor thing..." Freddie said, tears started to form in his own eyes. "I'm so sorry this had to happen to you...."

"Thank you." Diamond said, smiling warmly at Freddie. "It's fine, now. But please don't punish them! The fact that I have friends to comfort me now....Is punishment enough."

Diamond Tiara's little sob story had nothing but positive results. Even Applejack was buying into it! She was a hick, after all, so this was expected.

"I am SO sorry, Diamond...." Ms. Cheerilee said sincerely. "If this bullying ever occurs again, you come tell me, and I'll have those girls in Detention for MONTHS!"

"Thank you, Ms. Cheerilee." Diamond said. "But I doubt that will happen...My new friends have got my back! I congratulate you for having some kind sons, Mr. Hediger."

"Thank you, sweetie!" Freddie said happily. "Yeah, they sure are something...."

Applejack couldn't believe what she had heard. She would be having a LONG talk with her sister now....

"Ah'm migthy sorry, Diamond Tiara." Applejack said. "Ah promise, neither mah sister or her little Friends will be giving you anymore trouble."

Diamond Tiara smiled. "Thank you!"

Freddie and Applejack left the School after that. Applejack couldn't believe she would have to give her sister a scolding....

"You have a good night, Diamond Tiara." Ms. Cheerilee called out as Diamond Tiara began trotting off.

"Bye, Ms. Cheerilee!" Diamond Tiara said warmly, but as soon as she was out of the school, and out of hearing distance, her sweet smile turned into that signature snobby smirk.

Diamond Tiara laughed. "Ha! Idiots...."

-------TO BE CONTINUED--------

The King Stands Alone

"How'd it go, Applejack?" Apple Bloom excitedly asked. She had to wait outside through that entire Meeting, even thought it wasn't that long. "Did Diamond Tiara get in trouble?" She had a hopeful smile on her face.

"Ah caint say she did." Applejack answered, immediately crushing Apple Bloom's hopes. "But I know somepony else who is in a mighty fine heap'a trouble."

"Who?" The confused filly asked.

Applejack then glared at her sister. "You." She plainly said.

Apple Bloom gasped in horror. She did nothing wrong! This all must've been a big misunderstanding! "ME? Ah didn't do anythin', sis!" She squealed, trying to plead her case.

"Ya'll hush your little mouth, now." Applejack said, not listening to her sister. "I'm gonna have a talk with ya when we get back to the Farm."

Apple Bloom certainly would not hush. Not when she was being wrongfully accused. "But sis! Ah didn't do any-"

She was interrupted by Applejack, who had raised her tone a bit. "Ah don't wanna hear a PEEP outta you, Apple Bloom."

Apple Bloom frowned, and looked at Freddie for help.

"I'm sorry, sweetie..." Freddie said, shaking his head. "But this is between you and your sister. I'm not an Apple family member, so I have no say."

Apple Bloom had noone to turn to now, whatever she did.....She would have to face the music for it. She was quiet, just like her sister told her to be, on the walk home.

Meanwhile....

Sugarcube Corner.....

The meeting between the boys had been over for a while. They all had jobs now, well, a plan to get a Job, atleast, which was a great start. To celebrate the occasion, the boys put the liquor Freddie had brought just in case to good use. Luckily, Freddie had drank none last night, so it all would be saved for this special get-together.

"Look at all of you saps..." Punk said, chuckling at his idiotic friends and their idiotic lifestyles. "Drinking like there's no tomorrow. It's good that I am the only Straightedge recipient here, because I'm also the only one of us with a vehicle..."

"Shut the hell up, you fucking.....Bitch." Nova slurred. "You're ruining the buuuuuuuuzzzzzzz..."

"Buzz is Ze's favorite word...." Ze said stupidly. "It just.....Flies off the tongue. Zzzzzzzzzz..........Zzzzzzzzzzzz.........Zzzzzzz......"

Nova and Ze then started their own "Zzzzzzzzz" contest. Whoever could say Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz longer than the other would win. It was sure to get annoying.....FAST.

"FUCKING STUPID.....ASSES!" Marcus nearly screamed. A sober Marcus Sims was bad enough, but today.....An evil Creature had invaded Ponyville......Doom....Was now inevitable....For noone could stop........DRUNKUS SIMS.

A few of the customers were looking over at the group of renegades. They did not know what to think....But they had known that this was not going to end well.

Drunkus noticed the amount of attention he was getting for the on-lookers, and he did not appreciate the gawking. "HEY.....THE FUUUUCK YOU LOOKIN' AT?!" This time he was screaming. "I'LL KNOCK YOUR ASS OFF WITH......YEAH!" Of course he was drunk, and could barely talk. The customers teeth were chattering in fear, they ran out of the sweets shop just in time before a Drunkus tirade could insue.

"HEY! WAIT!" Pinkie Pie called out to her now lost customers. "I've got your honey cake for you! COME BACK!" It was no use, once you encounter Drunkus....You can NEVER go back to the original location where you encountered Drunkus. It was rule Number 8 of "The Book of Drunkus." yes, this character is so famous, well, infamous really....He has his own book. His next goal, was "Drunkus: The Movie."

Drunkus laughed. "I'M GONNA BE A MOOOVIEEEE STAAAARRR......I WILL RAPE TOM CRUISE'S KIDS!"

"Marky, stop!" Pinkie said, trotting over to the over-the-top character. "You're scaring away the customers!"

"FIRST OFF, PINKIIIEIEEEEE...." Drunkus said, now turning to the pony. ".....I LIKE THAT NAME A LOT...."

Pinkie immediately perked up. "You do?" She said happily.

Drunkus took another sip of alcohol, and then grinned. He hadn't swallowed the alcohol yet, though, and it just pored through the gaps in his teeth, and dripped onto the floor. "HELL YEAH! IT'S SOOOO........CUTE!" He was now flailing his hooves around like some mad-man, he almost hit Austin, who along with Punk, wasn't drinking, either.

"I KNEW you liked it, Marky!" Pinkie said, smiling widely. "You just needed to get used to it!"

"YA WANNA KNOW WHAT ELSE I THINK IS CUTEEEEE?" Drunkus said, taking another drink.

Pinkie was curious. "What?" She said, cocking her head.

Drunkus then threw his glass on the floor, it shattered. This was one of Drunkus' many tactics.....Frighten the opposition. It failed, though, because ya see....Only one other monster can match up to Drunkus, and that....Is Pinkus Pieakus. Marcus wasn't done yet, though....He had a secret weapon, and he planned to unleash it.

"YOU FUCKING CUTE!" Drunkus said, grabbing Pinkie into a bear-hug. It would seem that Drunkus had the upper-hand....

Pinkie would smile, but her ribcage was being crushed.....And that's not good. "Thanks, Marky....." She strained, trying to free herself from Drunkus' grasp. But the Pinkus Pieacus is just too weak to free itself. Only Drunkus himself can release his prey.

Drunkus put down Pinkie, which caused Pinkie to gain back her smile. "YOU'RE LIKE A BIG BOTTLE OF PEPTO....BISMOL....AND I WANNA FUCKIN' DRINK IT ALLLLLLL...UP!" Drunkus was basically....Talking out of his ass now, so to speak.

Pinkie giggled. "You can't drink me, silly! I'm all meat!"

This tactic wasn't working....Perhaps if Drunkus changed his attack. "I.......I LOVE YOUR PINK ASS." Drunkus said, leaving absolutely NO regrets!

Now.....NOW.....Pinkie was a bit creeped out. And it took a LOT to creep Pinkie Pie out. "Ummmmmm....." Was all she could say, her mouth a big O.

"LET'S GO JUMP ON YOUR BED.....RIGHT.....NOW......" Drunkus said, taking another drink of alcohol with a new glass.

"And.....Do....What?" Pinkie said, curious. "OOOOHHHH! You wanna play Hooves and Ladders, don't you?!" Pinkie smiled widely at the thought of playing her favorite board-game, with her favorite friend.

".....HUH?" Drunkus said, dropping another glass, it too, shattered. "NO, PINK FUCKING.......PINK FUCK....I WANNA......SCREW YOU!"

Pinkus Pieakus had figured it out. The newest tactic of Drunkus....MATING. She didn't want to have sex with the hideous beast, though, so she would continue to milk this request.

"You wanna SCREW me? Then go get a Screwdriver, silly!" Pinkie replied, giggling.

Drunkus gasped in awe....This was the perfect...Thing to mate with! "....KINKY BITCH...." Drunkus said, smiling. "HOLY FUCKING....FUCK! I'M GIVING YOU A NEW NICKNAME......KINKIE PIE!" Noone ever said Drunkus couldn't be a jokester.

Pinkie chuckled nervously. "Marky, I think you've had a bit too much to drink...." She slowly backed away.

All the while this was going on, Freddie's drunk self was rolling on the floor. He had been laughing since his first drink. "....KINKIE PIE!" Freddie screamed, trying to catch his breath. "I NEVER WOULD'VE THOUGHT OF THAT!"

"SHUT UP.....BITCH!'' Drunkus replied, starting to yell again. "I....FUCKING DRANK......CARRY THE 3.....ZERO FUCKING GLASSES OF ALCO......ALCO....FUCK!"

"Wow..." Pinkie said, laughing once again. "I'm better at Math than you, Marky!"

This was just a joke, of course.....Marcus would know that. But Drunkus? Well, Drunkus hated comedians, and would eat them when given the chance. So it's no surprise he was pissed. "BITCH....YOU MAKING FUN OF ME? I WILL RAPE YOUR DICK AND THEN EAT YOUR PUBES!!!!!!" Drunkus started to advance towards Pinkie, but immediately fell down after his first step. He was the drunkest out of him and his friends.

"FUCKING...GRAVITY!" Drunkus yelled, getting back up, and walking again. He was wobbling, but was able to keep his balance, non-the-less.

Drunkus was close to his Mate, but Ryback came out of nowhere, and pushed him with so much force, he FLEW over the group's table, and hit the wall head on. So close...But so far....

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM......FROM HER!" Ryback screamed at Drunkus. Wait? Did he just....Talk? I need to create a diversion to get your mind off of the fact that Ryback just talked....Umm.....I LIKE 3 YEAR OLD BOY DICKS IN MAH MOUTH, YUM YUM ALL DAY LONG.

Drunkus was shaken, but not yet stirred.....He got back up, a pissed off look on his face. "I WILL KICK YOUR ASS....DICK!" Drunkus then started to advance towards Ryback, but he was far to drunk, and ended up just passing out after 4 whole steps.

Everyone in the room was frozen in absolute Horror. Ryback NEVER talked....And not only that, but he had slain the almighty Drunkus! The King stands alone!

"Thanks, Rybby!" Pinkie said, hugging the big guy.

"Huh....." Austin said, rubbing his eyes in disbelief. "Must have been the liquor talking...."

Meanwhile....

Sweet Apple Acres....

It was officially....Time to face the Music. Apple Bloom and Applejack were left by Freddie on the way to the Farm, since he had to finish off the rest of his Alcohol. No doubt he would be back at Berry Punch's later tonight. But fuck Freddie right now....This is a whole 'nother segment!

Damian, Kit and Tate were shooting daggers at Apple Bloom with their eyes. Apple Bloom returned the same type of stare to them. Her sister led her into the barn, so the sure to be long and scathing talk could begin.

Applejack closed the door, so noone could hear what was sure to be the most boring and unneeded scolding in the History of scolding.

That was what Apple Bloom....But as she would soon learn, she was sadly mistaken.

"What did ah do, sis?!" Was the first thing to come out of Apple Bloom's mouth. Diamond Tiara must have baited her sister some crude information during that meeting.

"During that meeting..." Applejack began. "Diamond Tiara admitted to your teacher, Freddie and mahself.....That you and your little friends have been bullyin' her for a while now...."

"What?!" Apple Bloom nearly yelled in shock. What a load of crap! "But ah don't bully her, sis! She bullies-"

Once again, Apple Bloom was interrupted by her big sister. "Ah'll give you your chance ta talk.....Now let me finish...." Apple Bloom listened.

Applejack continued. "Ah just have one thing, and one thing only ta say to ya......" Apple Bloom prepared for the worst. ".....Ah believe ya."

Well, some scolding THIS was! It certainly didn't take much to convince her sister otherwise. "You WHAT?!" Apple Bloom said, shocked.

Applejack nodded. "That's right. That spoiled filly was lying like a STORM! Ah didn't believe a word she said!"

"Of COURSE Diamond Tiara would try to get her way outta this....." Apple Bloom thought. But her plan backfired. "What lie did she try ta tell this time, sis?" Apple Bloom asked, pouting.

"Oh, just some muck about havin' no friends, which that ah actually believe." Applejack chuckled. "Sayin' ya'll bully her and make fun'a her for being rich and all at recess. And then Freddie's boys came along, and ya'll stopped bullying."

"That ain't true, Applejack!" Apple Bloom cried.

"Ah know, Apple Bloom....." Applejack replied, smiling. "But Ms. Cheerilee said Scootaloo got in trouble for yellin' in class......She surely wouldn't lie, would she?"

Apple Bloom frowned now. "No, Ms. Cheerilee was tellin' the truth. But we only yelled cuz Diamond Tiara and those boys were makin' us mad! Tauntin' us in class and what not."

"So ah guess you WERE misbehavin' in class..." Applejack said, now glaring at her sister.

"I'm awful sorry, sis." Apple Bloom said, frowning and looking at the ground. "Go ahead.....Name mah punishment. But PLEASE, don't tell me ah have ta rub Granny Smith's hooves again!" Apple Bloom cringed just at the thought.

Applejack smiled once again. "Ah don't think this calls for a punishment...." She proclaimed, causing Apple Bloom to smile in shock once again. "But....I will give ya some advice, sis...."

"Okay!" Apple Bloom said gleefully. "What is it?"

"No matter how much Diamond Tiara n' those boys get under your skin.....You just keep your composure. Don't give em' the satisfaction of knowin' that they can break you. You tell your friends that, too. Cuz next time I find out you got in trouble, ah WILL give you a punishment."

Apple Bloom wondered what the punishment would be, but she figured she wouldn't wanna know. "You got it, sis! Ah won't let em' git ta me!"

Applejack smiled. "Good. And another thing....Don't worry about those boys. Cuz just like ah caught on ta Diamond Tiara's lies....So will they. Before ya know it, they'll be your friends again."

Apple Bloom wasn't sure that was possible, after the way the boys shut her down. "Ah don't know, Applejack....They think we're bullies."

"Don't worry, Apple Bloom." Applejack replied. "Diamond Tiara will slip up and do somethin' to reveal what she's really up ta. I'm SURE of it."

Apple Bloom nodded, and then went up to hug her sister. "Ah love ya, sis...." Apple Bloom said, nuzzling into her sister's chest.

Applejack smiled ever so sweetly. "Ah, hey....Ah love ya too, ya little bugger!" She then rustled up her sister's hair, causing her to giggle.

"Man...." Applejack thought. "Ah sure do love bein' a sister."

DAAAAAAWWWWWWW.....FLUFF!

Several hours Later.....

Sugarcube Corner......

It was night-time once again in Ponyville. Almost all the shops were closed, and many Ponies were settling into bed, getting ready for what awaited them tomorrow. One of those ponies, was Pinkie Pie. But just before she was set to go upstairs...She forgot something.

Pinkie walked over to the Table where the meeting was held at earlier. And just as he had been for several hours....Marcus lay asleep right next to the table. Pinkie smiled, and leaned down to Marcus, and kissed him on the cheek.

"Goodnight, Marky...." Pinkie said sweetly, and then she was off to bed.

Apparently, the kiss caused Marcus to go into a dream. "EHHHHH....PEPTO-BISMOL...." Marcus muttered.

----TO BE CONTINUED------

Pinkamena-Eye

The next Day....

Sugarcube Corner....

Marcus awoke to what else, a hopping Pinkie Pie. BOING, BOING, BOING, BOING, BOING, this was a usual routine. Fuck alarm clocks, Pinkie was annoying enough to be one herself. Marcus had no remembrance of anything past 3:00 yesterday. He just knew he drank a bit, and that we it. He had an aching headache. "Yup...." Marcus thought. "I got drunk.....Shit."

Pinkie noticed Marcus painful groans, and hopped over to him. "Good morning, Groany McGroaninson! How's your head?"

Marcus frowned. "It hurts a fraction worse than everytime you talk...." He didn't hate Pinkie, but she was just so....Happy. It wasn't normal. He really had to get her an appointment with a psychiatrist.

Pinkie giggled. Words could not hurt her, after all. "You're just sooooooo GRUMPY, Marky!" Marcus rolled his eyes. No shit. "And I know what will cheer you up!"

Marcus didn't want to know....And he sure as hell wanted no part of it. "Before you attempt to brighten my day with your OH-SO beautiful voice...." He began sarcastically. "I need to ask you....What happened yesterday?"

Pinkie frowned as she thought back to the events of yesterday. There was a meeting, then everyone got drunk, and then....She almost got raped. "Well..." Pinkie began. "During the meeting, all of you started drinking Freddie's liquor....All of you except for Philly and Austin."

"Yeah, I remember that." Marcus replied. "What else?"

"You got drunk." Pinkie said plainly. "And you started yelling, you even scared away some customers who were supposed to pick up their Honey cake!"

"Yeah....I tend to yell when I'm drunk..." Marcus said, shrugging. "What else?"

"Ummm...." Pinkie stammered, not wanting to tell Marcus. It could ruin their friendship!

"Goddammit, Pinkie..." Marcus grumbled. "TELL ME."

"Okay!" Pinkie said, frowning. "You.....Wanted to have.....Ummmm....You wanted to have......SEX with me......"

Marcus was sure she was trolling. The day he wanted to have sex with a Pony of all things, would be the day he dropped dead. "That's not funny, Pinkie...." He said, glaring at the pink pony.

"Well, duh!" Pinkie exclaimed, flailing her arms. "It's disgusting!" She then realized what Marcus meant. "Do you not believe me?!"

Marcus shook his head. "After what you ponies did, I will NEVER have any feelings like that towards a pony." Pinkie was about to tell Marcus that it was the truth, but he cut her off. "Nevermind, Pinkie...." He said, scowling.

Pinkie frowned. She didn't get it. He asked her to him what happened, and when she tried to, he told her to forget it. "Okay....."

Marcus decided to change the subject. "So, what is it that's going to cheer me up?"

Pinkie perked up once again, she gestured towards something on the kitchen counter. Marcus trotted over to the counter, and he saw a big stack of invitations.

"You're....Throwing us a Party?" Marcus said, shocked.

"Well, yeah!" Pinkie said gleefully. "I throw parties for ALL the new ponies in Ponyville!"

Marcus rolled his eyes. "With her personality, I shouldn't be so fucking surprised...." He thought. "Well, ummm.....Cool." Marcus said, honestly very grateful. But he wouldn't let her know that.

Pinkie cocked her head. "Marky....Isn't there something you want to say?"

"Huh?" Marcus said, snapping back to reality. "Oh, yeah......Cool."

Pinkie was starting to become impatient. "Marky...." She said, raising her tone.

"What?" Marcus said, glaring back at Pinkie.

"Say 'thank you'....." Pinkie said, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Pinkie......Shut your hole." Marcus said, trying to avoid the dreaded two words.

Pinkie gasped. "Thanks for reminding me!" She exclaimed as she ran over to shut a hole in the space time continium.

Marcus' jaw dropped. "WHAT........?" He said quietly, trying to figure out what just happened.

Pinkie just giggled. "That was holey....He likes to open every now and again." Marcus just blinked in confusion.

"I don't....Want to know..." Marcus said, shaking his head.

"Good." Pinkie replied. "It's probably for the best if you didn't." She said with a wink.

"The hell are you talking abou-" Marcus tried to figure out how this pony could interract with random holes, but she cut him off.

"Well, Marky....I need you to pass out these invitations to everyone!" She said, picking up Gummy.

"What about you?" Marcus asked, not wanting to do anything with this bitch of a headache.

"I have to take Gummy to the dentist." Pinkie explained, grinning widely.

Marcus' right eye started twitching. "Pinkie....Gummy has no teeth....."

Pinkie sshed Marcus. She leaned in to whisper to him. "Don't say that so loud.....You'll hurt his feelings....."

Marcus was becoming stupider and stupider with every added moment he spent with this pony. "THEN WHY ARE YOU TAKING HIM TO THE DENTIST?!" He whispered back, but much more loudly.

"He likes to be to treated like he actually has teeth...." Pinkie said, turning back and looking at Gummy, and waving nervously. She then stopped whispering. "I wont be gone too long..." She was about to walk out the door with Gummy, but she realized something. "Oh! I almost forgot! Don't forget to wear the Outfit, Marky."

Marcus cocked an eyebrow. "What outfit?"

Pinkie giggled. "The one on you right now, silly!"

"The fuck are you talking ab-" Marcus looked down at himself, Pinkie wasn't kidding.....Marcus was wearing an outfit that made him look like a carbon copy of Pinkie Pie. "HOW THE HELL DID THIS GET ON ME?!"

"I put it on you just now, dumb dumb!" Pinkie answered, giggling some more.

"How.....HOW DID YOU-"

"Bye, Marky!" Pinkie said, walking out of the store. "And don't forget to sing a Soooonnggg!"

Marcus looked at himself, and then at the wall where the hole earlier had been.

"Yup...." Marcus proclaimed. ".....She's fucking with me...."

Meanwhile.....

Ponyville Elementary.....

It was time for another day at School. Everyone was on time today....Except for the four new foals: Kenny, Cartman, Eric and Stan. Ms. Cheerilee wondered where they were. They made a HORRIBLE impression yesterday, and she really wanted them to do good today. But so far, they were 30 minutes late.

Finally, after 10 more minutes of waiting, the three boys, minus Kenny, walked into class. They found their seats in the back, and sat down like they had been there the whole time.

"Boys...." Ms. Cheerilee began. "Where is Kenny?"

Cartman cleared his throat. He might as well be honest, even though it hurt him.... "Oh, that poor bastard? He died." Cartman said, having no remorse.

Most of the class gasped, except for Diamond Tiara, who just yawned.

"ERIC!" Ms. Cheerilee scolded. "DON'T SAY THAT!"

Cartman just chuckled. "Why not? Just being honest.....Kenny's poor, he's a bastard, and he's dead. That's three strikes.....He's out."

Ms. Cheerilee put a hoof over her mouth in shock. "These boys...." Ms. Cheerilee thought. "They aren't normal...."

"Ith Kenny really.....DEAD?" Twist gulped.

"That's right, spit-shine...." Cartman said, lounging back into his chair. "He's as dead as your ability to talk..."

"Is....Is this true? Stan, Kyle?"

Kyle just hid his face in his jacket. He still hadn't gotten over the death of his friend....And he probably never would.

"He doesn't wanna talk about it, Ms. Cheerilee..." Stan explained, answering for Kyle. "But yeah, Kenny's dead...We saw him die right in front of our eyes."

Ms. Cheerilee gasped. "And you boys never called the police or ANYTHING?!"

"Screw that...." Cartman said. "Kenny would've told the cops to fuck off. We just did what he wanted."

Ms. Cheerilee smashed her head into her desk. This was going to be a LONG year....

Meanwhile....

Cloudsdale....

Rainbow Dash was still sleeping. She would only wake up at 8:45 if someone threw something at her, and this...Was just one of those day. For the second time in a day, Rainbow Dash was woken up by a piece of paper.

Rainbow Dash did not move, she just laid still, underneath today's edition of The Ponyville Post, she was pissed off that she was awoken once again.

"Whoever woke me up..." Rainbow growled. "Better have a GOOD REASON." She removed the paper from her face, and stood up. The culprits, were none other than Ze and Nova.

"Please, Dash....." Ze said, throwing his hooves up in surrender. "Do not hurt Ze....Hurt James! He threw the paper!"

"I don't care WHO threw the paper...." Dash said, scowling. "I just want to know....WHY would you wake me up at..." She stared off into the distance at the giant Clock in the middle of Cloudsdale. "8:45?! YOU TWO BETTER START TALKING...."

Nova gulped, and Ze pushed him forward, causing him to land right in front of Dash's hooves. "Heh heh...." Nova laughed nervously, scared for his life. "You're lookin' hot, Dash..."

Rainbow was not amused. Her looks did not matter to her right now, what matter was that these two fools had awoken her....Now, they would pay the price.

"You're gonna be hot when I burn you alive if you don't start talking..." Dash replied, glaring Nova down.

Nova started sweating. "I'm sorry I woke you up...But me and Ze were just delivered the paper for today....And....We....Think you might want to look at the headline." Ze nodded.

"What are you bozos talking abo-" Dash was about to kill Ze and Nova for wasting her time, but when she looked down at the Newspaper, she realized she would have to kill someone else.....

The headline of the Newspaper read: Lesbians in Ponyville: Misleaded Mares. And below the Headline.....Was a picture....Of none other than Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash....

.....And they were kissing.....

---------TO BE CONTINUED-------

Simsagram

Fuck her lack of sleep thanks to Ze and Nova! This was far worse! She remembered everything yesterday, and her kissing Fluttershy was not referenced in her mental capacity. Maybe she got drunk for just a split second.....Yeah, right. In fact, Rainbow Dash knew for a FACT that she had never kissed Fluttershy, or any mare, for that matter.

Nova chuckled. "You swing that way, eh, Dashie?" Ze should probably have told him it might not have been the best idea to say that....But hey, it's his funeral if he wants to piss her off.

"Nova...." Dash began, still looking at the picture. "I'm going to be very nice for right now and not get the sudden urge to hurt you....Don't make me change my mind." Nova gulped. She was definitely serious, the tone in her voice was the most intimidating it had been since he met her.

"Ze does not want to be hurt, either," Ze intervened. "But he has to ask....Why would you kiss Fluttershy?"

Rainbow Dash threw the newspaper on the cloud she was standing on. "I'm gonna tell you two this ONCE, and only ONCE.....I did. Not. Kiss. Fluttershy. If I did, I would have remembered it!"

Nova decided to make another bold move. "Then why is there a picture of you two swappin' spit in the newspaper?"

Dash sighed. "I don't know....I think somepony set me up!"

Ze and Nova traded nervous looks. "Who do you think did it?" Ze asked.

"I think I have an idea...." Dash answered, staring off in the direction of the Everfree Forest. "Follow me, you guys!" She now had a vengeful look in her eyes, and flew up into the sky.

"Follow you?" Nova said. "We still can't fly!"

"You're gonna have to learn soon." Dash said, crossing her arms impatiently. "I can't baby you two with those stupid piggy-back rides. They were starting to hurt my back..." She rubbed her back tenderly.

Nova chuckled. "You're a wussy pony."

Dash sent him another glare. "I could break your neck and you wouldn't even notice." Dash noticed the scared look on Nova's face, and giggled. "Awww, come on! I couldn't hurt you guys!"

"Thew..." Nova and Ze said simultaneously, wiping sweat from their foreheads.

"Unless.....You're into that kind of stuff." Dash said with a smirk, causing gasps from Nova and Ze. "Comeon, losers!"

"Give Ze and James a second." Ze said, walking away from Dash so she couldn't eavesdrop on their conversation.

"Dude.....She's kinky!" Nova whispered, his eyes beaming with excitement. "She likes hurting!"

"AND THAT'S A GOOD THING?!" Ze said in a loud whisper.

"Well.....Yeah." Nova said, snickering.

"Why do you want to have sex with a Pony?!" Ze asked what he had been wanting to for a long time. He certainly wondered what was wrong with his friends....

"The fuck you talking about?" Nova said, quirking an eyebrow. "She's all yours."

"WHAT!?" Ze replied, getting frustrated.

"I gotta ask ya, though...." Nova interrupted. "Why a pony? And why.....HER? She's cool and all, but it just seems like you'd want someone liiikkeee....Rarity."

Ze's eyes bulged at such an accusation. "ZE WANTS NO PONY....."

"Bullshit, asshole!" Nova said, now showing his teeth. "I planned this shit! YOU TWO WILL HAVE BABIES!"

"WHAT?!" Ze replied, about ready to punch his friend for being so stupid. "ZE WILL NOT BE HAVING ANY BABIES WITH A PONY!"

Nova shook his head, sighing. "Don't you think about screwing this up, Romeo....You wanted the skittles...You're gonna get the skittles."

"You're......YOU'RE INSANE!" Ze exclaimed, throwing his front hooves against his face in frustration.

"I'm insane?" Nova replied, laughing. "You're the one who wants to lick a pony's butthole....So don't even START with me."

Rainbow Dash tapped her foot impatiently against the air. She knew what these two were talking about, her, of course. She couldn't blame them.....But they were wasting precious time. She had a lead on who took that picture....But whoever it was, had somehow altered it to make it look like Dash was kissing one of her best friends....Everything about that sentence sounded so....Wrong. Equestria was not exactly technology-savvy. It's not like they had Photoshop....

"That comment I made probably set them off..." Dash thought. "I should probably stop leading them on...There's no way either of them like me." Dash frowned. Ze and Nova were humans after-all.....Like CM Punk said, on Earth, they date their own kind, not ponies.

But in all honesty....Rainbow Dash made the comment, because she herself, liked Nova. She wasn't interested in Ze.....Because he reminded her of Trixie, and Trixie and Dash weren't exactly the best of friends just yet. But Nova had a certain...Flare to him. He was funny as hell, first of all, a lot more funny than Ze, Ze was just annoying. Dash liked Nova's beard, it wasn't too scraggly, but it definitely wasn't peach fuzz. If Pinkie Pie one day retired from the prank business, Nova and Rainbow Dash could become the new Tandem of Hilarity in Ponyville. They would reign supreme with their comedic Minds, which Rainbow Dash could tell, Nova had a strong comedic sense about him, although she wondered if he was too.....Immature for her. But Dash would DEFINITELY change her naughtiness for Nova.

Rainbow Dash was so developed in her thoughts, she didn't realize Nova and Ze were watching her for about a minute, before Nova finally spoke up. "HEY, BLUE-BALLS!!!!" Nova screamed, startling Dash out of her thoughts. "Get the cock out of your ear and LET'S GOOOOOOOHUBLUBLUBLBUBLBLUUUU!!!!"

Dash couldn't but laugh at the way Nova talked. "What's a "HUBLUBLUBLUBLUBLUBLUBLUBLUUUUUU?" She asked, snickering at the way it sounded when she said it.

"Nova has a.....Rather odd way of speaking his mind..." Ze answered, looking over at his friend, who was standing up, his hooves at his hips proudly.

"Yeah...." Nova said, soaking in the compliments, atleast he thought they were compliments. "I'm fucking fancy...."

Dash laughed at how silly he was. The more she thought about it....The more she contemplated if Nova and Pinkie would be better together than the two of them.....

"Naaaahhh...." Dash thought. "Pinkie wouldn't be a good girlfriend to ANYONE."

"You still thinking, bitch?!" Nova said, himself now impatient.

"Yeah!" Dash said, flying down and getting in Nova's face. "What you gonna do about it?!"

Nova would not back down. "I'LL RAPE YOU." He answered in the most serious voice he could muster, which wasn't that serious.

Dash cringed. He'd better not try to do that during their first date..... "Uuuuhhh, yeaaahhh..." Dash replied, not knowing what to say. "Forget I said anything!" With that, Rainbow Dash went to the sky, and gestured at the guys to follow them, so they did.

Ze and Nova weren't professionals just yet, but they were getting better, Dash could tell. For example, first day of practice, they both crashed for a combined total....Of 132 times. Yesterday, they only crashed 21 times. By the end of the week, they should get the hang of it. After-all, flying wasn't as hard as everyone says it is, the only people who say that are Unicorns and Earth Ponies. All you need is a good sense of direction, and you should have no problem.

Ze and Nova were now alongside Dash, but that's only because she was flying slow enough to where they could easily catch up. She looked at Nova, and smiled at him, but Nova just had a disgusted, yet funny look on his face, almost like he was screwing with Dash. This is why she couldn't wait for Nova to become a natural at this....Once a day, she would plan an afternoon fly between the two of them, No third-person dialogue from Ze....Just Nova, and Rainbow Dash. The hardest part would have to be that Dash would have to set up the flights without giving Nova the idea that they were actually dates. She would just tell him that she would like to give him a grade on his skills every day, but he would probably ask why Ze wouldn't have to do it. In that case, Dash would say that Ze is too good for practice.

"Yeah!" Rainbow Dash said aloud. "Perfect plan!" She then realized that those words were supposed to stay inside of her head.....She realized Ze and Nova were looking at her like she was weird.

"What plan?" Ze said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah!" Nova exclaimed. "You gonna try to rape us?!"

Dash laughed. "You're so odd, Nova....No, it's my plan to make you both AWESOME fliers!" She grinned happily at how smoothly she got around that. The guys didn't suspect a THING.

Ze smiled hopefully. "How?" He asked with a smile.

"Simple." Dash began explaining. "Starting tomorrow....I'm going to have one on one training session with you both. We will work on the same attributes we did as a group, but this time...You two wont be together."

"Why won't we be together?" Ze asked. "Damn....He's too curious." Dash thought.

"Because..." Dash continued. "It might help you both learn quicker if you're separated. Because I've noticed, you two goof off A LOT during training....I think it's screwing up our training resume."

"Finally!" Nova said, throwing up his hooves in the arm, as if thanking good. "This asshole is screwing up my chance to be a FUCKING AWESOME PEGASUS!"

"You are doing the same...." Ze retorted, scowling. "That is a great idea, Rainbow Dash."

Dash smiled. "Eh, I'm used to it."

Nova rolled his eyes. "Smug bitch..." He thought. "That's why Ze and her are PERFECT together!"

Meanwhile.....

Twilight's Library....

A knock was heard at the door, and of course, Twilight was studying at the time, so now she would have to put it on hold. "Coming!" Twilight announced as she trotted over to the door. She opened it up with her magic, and what was at her doorstep...Is something Twilight would classify as "An abomination."

It was Marcus, dressed up in his Pinkie Pie getup, looking as ridiculous as ever. Twilight couldn't help but chuckle, no matter how rude it was.

"H-hello, Marcus..." She said, holding her hooves over her mouth so laughter wouldn't escape. "What can I-help you with?"

Marcus was about to answer, but before he could, Austin showed up next to Twilight. He heard "Marcus" and wanted to come talk to his friend.....Ehh, now he just wanted to laugh at his friend.

"WHAT IN THE...." Austin said, his eyes wide. "Marcus? Is....Is that you?"

Marcus sighed. He was used to this, atleast Austin wasn't laughing, like everyone in town was.....Marcus had to fight the urge to punch every pony in town...

"Please.....Don't laugh..." Marcus said, shaking his head.

"How could I laugh?" Austin replied. "This isn't funny....It's....BRUTAL."

"That's what I was thinking when I put it on...." Marcus mumbled. "Apparently your pony friend here thinks it's funny..." He was staring at Twilight, who was still holding in her laughter.

"I'm so sorry, Marcus!" Twilight apologized sincerely. "It's just that....I didn't expect you to be the type to play dress up." She snickered.

Marcus groaned. "Atleast you're holding in your laughter....Everyone else in town had a fucking field day...."

"I'm sorry to hear that." Twilight said, her laughter all but leaving, now she just felt sorry for the poor guy. "Did Pinkie Pie tell you to wear this?"

Marcus said nothing, just nodded sadly. "She had to take Gummy to the dentist...So now lucky-ass me has to pass out these invitations." Twilight used her magic to grab an invitation, she began reading it.

"She does realize..." Austin informed. "That Gummy has no teeth....Right?"

"Don't hurt your brain too much..." Marcus suggested, rolling his eyes. "I've yet to fully grasp what that pony is all about...."

Twilight giggled. "Pinkie is just a free spirit." She explained. "She lives life to the fullest, and just wants everyone else to help live it with her."

"I understand she's happy and all..." Marcus replied. "But I mean....She just makes me scratch my head....Today, I saw her close a hole that came out of friggen nowhere!"

Austin's eyes bulged once again. "Wow....Really?"

Marcus nodded. "That girl has some weird mental issues. I ain't gotta problem with her, she's nice and all...A bit too nice, but she just....I just don't get it."

"Just give her a chance, Marcus." Twilght suggested. "Don't worry about how odd her antics are. She's the funnest pony in Ponyville, and a great and helpful person to know!"

"I just.....Think it will take awhile to get used to such a happy thing. I'm not used to it." Marcus said, shrugging.

Twilight frowned. "You just don't trust her....Do you? Including any of us?"

Marcus was surprised, impressed, and worried. Twilight hit the nail right on the head. "How did you...."

"She's Twilight, dude." Austin said, laughing. "She's one smart girl!"

Twilight blushed. "Well, I wouldn't say.....Yeah, I'm pretty smart!" She boasted.

"I want to trust you ponies, believe me..." Marcus continued. "But what your species did....It....Took a big toll on me...." He looked down at the ground in remembrance.

Twilight frowned. Austin was her favorite human, so far at least, but Marcus was definitely the most intriguing Human...Due to his background. Twilight was itching to know about his past. What could have happened that was so horrible that he would run off in tears?

"I'm not going to pressure you into to telling me..." Twilight said. "But, are you ever going to reveal your secret to us?"

"It will be hard...." Marcus replied. "But if I keep it bottled up inside of me, I'll just be a miserable little asshole for the rest of my life...."

Twilight blinked in confusion. "So....Is that a yes?"

Marcus nodded. "It's a yes. Just give me some time, though, okay?"

Twilight smiled, nodding understandingly. "You take all the time you need, Marcus. But let me just say....You can trust us with any secret you have. We will not make fun of you. Even though you humans have only been here a few days....We consider you good friends already."

Marcus' neck jumped back in surprise. "But....I'm a madman...Something horrible happened to me, I'm unstable...And you ponies consider me....As a friend?" He was actually very happy to hear such. He had friends, but he just figured these ponies would be weary of him.

"Of course!" Twilight exclaimed happily. "You aren't a madman....Or even unstable, Marcus. You just have a lot of weight on your shoulders right now...And once you release all of this tension, you will feel a lot better. You may not think we have a clue what you went through, and we don't....But I promise you, me and my friends will be there for you. You humans are honored guests, and we will make sure that you are happy throughout your stay."

"Wow..." Marcus said, although it was almost as soft as a whisper. A few tears started to form in his eyes. He felt like hugging Twilight as hard as he could, but his trust was not that high yet. Marcus even went so far as to smile.

"Thank you, Twilight Sparkle..." Marcus said, a droplet of tear escaping his eye. "I will see you and your friends at the party." He walked off quickly, it was already bad enough that he had cried in-front of her, and one of his friends. He just hoped, for Austin's safety, he didn't tell anybody else that he cried. But either way, Marcus felt good about himself right about now. He had friends he didn't even know.

"They'd better not expect me to ACT friendly with them for now, though..." Marcus thought, setting off to deliver his next invitation.

Twilight smiled. "Success!" She thought. She could make the devil herself feel secure....

Austin was still shocked. "I can't believe it...." He said slowly. "Marcus is such a sour-puss, and yet, you made him smile! YOU MADE HIM CRY!"

Twilight smiled. "Nopony deserves to feel alone...I'm glad that he was able to trust my words. His tears prove that he now trusts us, even if just a tiny bit more."

Austin chuckled. "You're amazing, Twi...." He didn't mean it like you would THINK he meant it, though. Twilight and Austin would never be anything more than friends....Austin had a wife....And never would he cheat on her. His parents taught him a long time ago, that Cheaters never win....And Austin still believed that quote to this day.

Twilight blushed some more. She loved talking to Austin, she had learned so much about him and where he was from, that she could write an entire novel about the History of Earth. And yes, she did have feelings for him...But she knew he had a wife, a wife he was very loyal too. Twilight promised she would never come between love, she was not one of those tramps you find on the side of a Trail in Detrot, she had genuine feelings for Austin, but if he didn't have them for her, she wouldn't show them.

Many minutes Later....

Sweet Apple Acres....

Marcus had reached his second destination, but as he approached Sweet Apple Acres, he couldn't help but fear for his sanity....He realized that Freddie lived here, and would most likely see him dressed up in.....THIS. What's worse is that Freddie would surely tell the rest of Equestria about how much Marcus enjoyed dressing up like ponies, which was completely false! And what's even worse than that, is when they got back to earth, Freddie's gums would be flabbin' about this day, you couldn't shut the guy up! His mouth ran 24 hours a day, and the only way it would halt, is if Marcus launched his fist into it, which he was very close to doing to other ponies, anyway.

Marcus sighed deeply, and knocked on the front door, a few moments later, and the door was opened. "Shit..." Marcus thought. His worst nightmare was now a reality. Standing in front of Marcus, was Freddie....And noone else.

Freddie scanned Marcus from top to bottom, all the while stifling laughter. It didn't take long, though, and unlike Twilight, Freddie erupted in a roar of laughter. The sight of seeing Marcus like this made Freddie want to jump through a ring of fire....It was so worth getting taken away from Earth to see this.

"He-hey....MARKIE PIE!" Freddie exclaimed, falling at Marcus' hooves. Marcus just groaned. This was going to suck....

"You tell anyone about this...." Marcus replied. "And that rooster on your head, is gonna be made into a nugget!" Marcus was serious, he was rotten to the core. If you pissed him off enough, he would do anything it took to make your life hell, and Freddie knew this better than anyone, but this was just too great of an opportunity too pass up!

Of course, Freddie had to be a smart-ass. "You can't fry hair, dumbass..." He retorted, snickering.

"YOU KNOW WHAT THE HELL I MEAN!" Marcus yelled, although not even Marcus's screams could wake up Granny Smith, who was asleep in her rocking Chair.

Freddie shook his head. "What you doing here, Markie Pie?" He snickered, causing Marcus to groan once more.

"Pinkie....Told me to pass this shit out." Marcus answered, dumping an invitation on Freddie's head, it stuck right in the spikes of his Fauxhawk. Yes, the hairstyle had advantages.

"Why the fuck you dressed like her, then?" Freddie asked, still chuckling. "You pussy whipped already, or what?"

Marcus gritted his teeth. "Easy, Marcus..." He thought. "Keep your cool....Grimace here isn't gonna break me down. I am more level-head than him, I know it!"

"I'm dressed like this..." Marcus explained. "Because that bitch, is NUTS. She wanted to take her toothless alligator, to the Dentist!"

Freddie laughed. "I'd figured you'd be used to this by now."

"FUCK NO." Marcus yelled. "I saw her close a portal to fuck knows where this Morning! I can't get used to insanity...."

"Jeez, dude...." Freddie replied, a worried look on his face. "You need alcohol more than I do...."

"I guess that's why I got drunk yesterday..." Marcus said, looking at the ground. "Hey, Freddie..."

"Yeah?" Freddie said, now reading the invitation.

"Yesterday...At the meeting....Did I....Do anything.....Odd?"

"Liiiikkkkeeee?"

"Oh, I don't know....Try to...Have sex with Pinkie?"

Freddie laughed. "Oh fuck no, dude."

"Thew....Thank god..."

"You tried to rape her, though."

Marcus's eyes bulged. "......WHAT....DID YOU SAY.....?"

"Yup. I couldn't believe it either, but you were saying how cute she was and how her ass was yours." Freddie laughed. "I need to teach you how it's done, son....You were too...Forceful, gotta play your cards, dude."

"I wasn't trying to rape Her! I was the alcohol talking!"

Freddie rolled his eyes. "That's what they ALL say....I also need to teach you how to come up with better excuses."

"How do you even Know this?! Weren't you drunk too?!"

"Duh..." Freddie replied, laughing. "But when you've drank as much as me, you still know what's going on around you. You can ask Austin, ask Punk, ask Ryback!"

Marcus gulped. "Ry-ryback....?"

"Yup. He knocked your ass out when you came onto Pinkie."

Marcus immediately shielded his eyes. He couldn't believe it....Yanking Pinkie's tale and getting scolded was bad enough, but he had a drunk Ryback after him yesterday! No wonder his back was so sore!

"I have to give him this invitation next..." Marcus said, realizing his next worst nightmare was going to come into play soon.

Freddie whistled. "Damn, sucks to be you....Atleast you don't hear two family members making out upstairs all day....." Freddie's eyes bulged as soon as he finished the sentence. Noone was supposed to know about that, dammit!

"....What?"

Freddie panicked. "Umm...Nothing! Later, dude!" Freddie quickly shut the door, right in Marcus' face.

"The hell was he....." Marcus tried to think. "I probably don't even wanna know..." With that, he walked off, ready to deliver the next invitation.


Meanwhile....

The Everfree Forest....

Rainbow Dash landed right by the grave of Kenny, right behind were Nova and Ze. "Wow!" Rainbow Dash said, impressed. "You two didn't even crash!"

"Yeah...But we still suck ass." Nova said, kicking at the ground.

"You're getting better! Don't beat yourself down!" Dash said, putting her hooves around their shoulders. "So you zig-zagged out of control a bit....You didn't crash even ONCE! That's something to be proud of."

"Ze will be a pro before Ze knows it!" Dash cringed at Ze's third-person gabble.

"No doubt!" Dash said, grinning. "You and Nova both!"

"Now, what the hell we doing here?" Nova said, looking around at the creepy forest.

"I just need to check something out..." Dash replied, setting her sights on the mound of dirt. "Help me did, you two." Dash went over to the dirt, and started prying her hooves into the ground. Ze and Nova shrugged, and soon joined.

With three ponies, it took less than a minute to dig up the contents of the grave. Ze and Nova looked on in shock, as they realized that there was a dead body beneath all that dirt.

"Dash...." Nova said quietly. "You killed him?"

Dash immediately gasped in shock. "No! I found him like this!"

"It's okay if you are a murderer, Dash..." Ze said, patting her on the shoulder.

Dash quickly brushed the hoof off. "I swear, guys. I came here yesterday, because I got a note from someone that told me to meet them Here, and when I got here....This....Kid.....Was dead."

"Poor dude...." Nova said, frowning. "But, why we digging him up again?"

"I just wanted to check something out..." Dash said, as she started shuffling through Kenny's coat pockets. Within a couple of seconds, Dash found what she was looking for. What she now held in her hoof, gained an angry look on her face.

"That little BASTARD..." Dash growled, she had found the photographer of that damn picture! Because what Dash was holding in her hoof,

....Was a camera.

--------TO BE CONTINUED------

So Much Fabric, So Much in Common...

“Ooooooohhhhhhh…..” Nova said, his mouth a big O after what Rainbow Dash had just said. “You called a dead kid a bastaaaarrddddd…..Ooooooohhhhhhh…..”

Dash turned around from Kenny’s dead body, and glared at Nova, she had a certain amount of rage in her eyes. “Of course I did!” Dash said, flinging the camera at Ze’s face, luckily, Ze caught it. “This jerk is the one that took that picture!”

Ze was skeptical. Sure, the young foal had a camera, but was he REALLY the one that took the picture? “Now, now, Rainbow Dash….” Ze said trotting over and consoling her. “We shouldn’t jump to conclusions.”

“Too late!” Dash said, throwing her arms into the air. “He’s guilty! Just look at the camera!”

“How the hell do we even know THAT’S the camera that took the picture?” Nova asked doubtfully, grabbing the camera with his front hooves. “I don’t suppose you ponies your film cartridges?”

Dash scowled. “What? You think we live in the Dark Age or something? Of course we use film cartridges!” Nova began looking at the camera, he found the film compartment on the back of the camera. He opened it up, and the negatives popped out.

“Yup, this is the camera, alright…” Nova said, almost dropping the camera in shock.

“No…Can’t be!” Ze exclaimed, still doubtful about this whole situation. Ze trotted over, and looked at the photos, yup, there it was, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash kissing ever so gently. Rainbow Dash was now looking at the picture, as well.

“Yup! I knew it!” Dash growled. “He’s the culprit! The sick son of a mare! He gets his jollies taking pictures of two mares kissing!”

“Yeah, but….If he took it….Then who killed him?” Ze asked curiously. He had an idea of who, but, for fear of his life, he wouldn’t say.

“I know what you guys are thinking….” Dash said, noticing the stares she was getting. “But, I swear on my wings, and may The Steed strike lightning down upon my wings and fry them if I’m lying, but I did. Not. Kill. This. Kid. I found him like this, after getting THIS leader…” She forgot she had the letter all along, and she could use it as proof that she was telling the truth. She showed the letter to Ze and Nova.

“What the? Fluttershy…Is your secret admirer?” Ze said, flabbergasted.

“Dayum….” Was all Nova could say.

“No, you guys! You don’t understand!” Dash cried. “When I got here, no one was waiting for me by this cave, I looked around, and all I found….Was him.” She gestured towards Kenny’s dead body.

“Then how the hell is this picture even possible?!” Nova shouted, causing some birds to fly off in fear.

“It beats me…” Dash said, shrugging. “But that was NOT me, and it was NOT Fluttershy in that picture….This kid screwed with it somehow!”

“This is all happening too fast…” Ze said, trotting over and leaning against the cave.

“I think we may need to take this to the Police….” Nova said, still looking at the odd photo.

“There IS no more police force, guys. After that Officer Jameson guy was found dead, the Ponyville police force has died along with him.”

“That WAS very strange….” Ze said, remembering the dick police-man. “It was also in the paper, that a photographer for the Ponyville Press, Lens Flare, was found dead with him.”

Dash nodded. “Yup. And it….Was right here.” Suddenly, a faint gust of wind breezed through the three’s hair as Dash said.

“This may be a helluva guess…” Nova began. “But, I think, there is a murderer here in Ponyville….”

Ze and Dash gasped. It seemed that was the only explanation at this point. “Think about it…” Nova continued. “Three dead ponies, found in the EXACT same spot…Within three days. Also, let’s not forget about that dead…Bird thing we saw in the air on our way here.”

“You may have something, Nova…And don’t forget, the dead Ursa MAJOR found decapitated. Who in the hell is powerful enough to kill one of those?!” Dash said, putting a hoof to her chin. “I remember, when I first buried this little guy, he didn’t have ANYTHING on him, not even that camera.”

“Someone must’ve came by when you left, and planted the evidence!” Ze proclaimed, his eyes bugging out.

“Ooohhh…They’re clever…” Pyro-Zi said from the inside of the cave.

“But who would want to cause so much….Anguish here in Ponyville?” Dash wondered. “It’s such a nice place, murder is rare.”

PZ-1 and PZ-3 snickered as Pyro-Zi cockily pointed both of his thumbs towards himself.

“I don’t know, but I think we’ve got bigger things to worry about…” Nova replied, looking at his surroundings. “The murderer so far, has only struck here….And right now…We…Are here…”

Rainbow Dash and Ze realized what Nova meant. They both gulped simultaneously. “Alright, guys….Remain calm…” Ze said, placing his front hooves in the air. However, this situation did not calm Rainbow Dash. She went absolutely NUTS.

“OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH!!!!!” Dash said, frantically flying around in circles. “WE’RE GONNA DIIIEEEE!!!!!”

Nova facehoofed. “Yup, she’s dumb like Ze, too…” He thought to himself. “You do know…We can fly….Right?”

Dash suddenly stopped in her tracks, she mentally groanded at how easily she had forgotten about her abilities. “….I knew that.” She replied, trying to play it cool. They all quickly placed the dirt back on Kenny’s dead body, and took to the air.

“Sorry little dude…” Dash said, frowning. “Didn’t mean to accuse you of something you didn’t do…”

“Ze wishes you good luck with The Steed.” Ze said, smiling warmly.

“I hope your mom stops being a whore so much, ya know, so she can remember her son.” Nova said, a tear forming in his eye. He wasn’t the most emotional Creature, that honor belonged to Sly, and while you may think that wasn’t a formal way to say goodbye…It seemed nice enough to Nova.

“NOVA!” Dash said, punching him in the arm.

“DAMMIT, WOMAN! I’M POURING MY HEART OUTHERE!” Nova retorted, clutching his arm in pain. Dash and Ze rolled their eyes.

“Goodbye…” The three said simultaneously, and flew off back to Cloudsdale.

Pyro-Zi and his faithful clones watches from the inside of the cave. “That….Almost made me want to cry…” Pyro-Zi said, sarcastically blowing his nose. He then noticed his two clones looking at him dumbfounded. “I said almost…”

PZ-1 and PZ-3 laughed. “You almost scared us, boss….” PZ-3 said, cringing at what a wussy Pyro-Zi would be like.

“I think we’ve had enough fun for one day….” Pyro-Zi said, smirking. “The last straw was when we placed the camera into the young Boy’s pockets…”

“Yeah, they’re on to something…” PZ-1 retorted.

Pyro-Zi laughed. “Don’t be stupid, PZ-1. Those ponies will NEVER find the murderer! This cave, is covered by a stainless steel door, which has been camouflaged so that it does not stand out."

"I would like to atleast think they are smart enough to know who the Murderer is..." PZ-1 replied.

"It is because they underestimate me....Even the humans, because they have never seen my feats of Technology." Pyro-Zi answered. "They would not expect a scrawny alien like me to kill an Ursa Major of all things!"

"When will we be able to show them how dangerous we really are, Emperor?" PZ-3 asked.

"In due time, my clones...In due time..." Pyro-Zi answered with a chuckle. "First, though, we need a plan....We need a way to...Introduce ourselves to these pathetic ponies. I do like to make a grand entrance, after all." He laughed evilly.

"I guess we will need much in the form of brain power for Step 1 in this grand scheme..." PZ-3 suggested.

"You are correct." Pyro-Zi replied, nodding. "None of us have come up with a single thing yet, but, I have faith, that with me and my 5 clones...Sooner or later, a master plan with fall into play! After all, we ARE evil geniuses..." PZ-1 and PZ-3 began to laugh evilly, but Pyro-Zi stopped them.

"Shhh....COMPUTER!" Pyro-Zi commanded. Once again, the computer spran up to life.

"Yes, Emperor?" The computer asked, ready to meet her master's requests.

"Call in the other clones..." Pyro-Zi smirked. "Five brains, are better than three...."


Fluttershy's Cottage....

Marcus sighed deeply. Fluttershy was the pony he feared the least, even though he didn't fear any of them. She was so quiet, she hadn't even talked to Marcus yet, which made Marcus smile. If she was a human, however, Marcus would try to get to know her, but since she is a Pony, he is a bit weary of her. Fluttershy's roommate, however? Yeah....HE intimidated him. Ryback was a man of few words, but his actions made him look like he was a blabbermouth. Even since they met, Ryback has always some way or another, tortured Marcus. Marcus was indeed, scared of Ryback, but he would only admit that if he was on his death bed. He slowly walked up to the door, no confidence had been brewed yet, but he had to deliver this invitation. He put everything on the line, and quietly knocked a few times.

"Coming..." Marcus heard a faint voice say from the inside. A few moments later, Fluttershy opened the door to the point where she could see who had been knocking. When she saw who was knocking, she squeaked in fear, and backed away from the door.

Marcus was afraid of Ryback, and Fluttershy was afraid of Marcus himself. Ever since the arrival of the humans, when Marcus pulled Pinkie's tale, her fear of him and grew. When he yelled at everypony for calling him out on his secret, it made Fluttershy's insides sink. Fluttershy thought about using 'The Stare' on the mean human, but he was just that...A human, and 'The Stare' only worked on animals. And now, Marcus was at her own house, knocking on her door. What did he want with her? He probably wanted to kill her, and make her his supper. She couldn't believe that humans ate meat....Who would want to eat the flesh of her beloved dead Animals? Some even ate RAW meat! It sickened her how these humans survived.

Marcus knew this would happen. He had scared over half of the Ponyville population since arriving, but Fluttershy was the only one of the Mane 6 he had scared so far. He had to deliver this invitation, and he had to deliver it before Ryback showed up. Too bad for Marcus, Ryback was right behind him, and without another word, he lifted him up into the air.

"Oh shit..." Marcus thought, as he was face to face with his worst nightmare. Ryback looked right at the pony, and in an amazing and confusing turn of events, Ryback....Hugged Marcus?

"Huh..?" Marcus thought bewilderedly. "Oh shit! He must think I'm Pinkie!" Marcus smirked. "I'm in the clear now!"

However, Ryback noticed the smell of this Pinkie. She did not smell like Cotton Candy....Ryback knew something was wrong. He pulled the hood off of the Pinkie Pie costume, and was shocked at the discovery that it was not Pinkie, but Marcus all along.

"Me and my fat thoughts....." Marcus thought, gulping. "He-hey, big man!"

Ryback snarled, and dropped Marcus to the ground. He began advancing towards him, and would've choked him soon, if Fluttershy had not sprang outside and blocked his path.

"Ryback! No!" Fluttershy quietly exclaimed. "He isn't here to hurt anypony!"

"Shes right!" Marcus sight, nodding frantically. "I[m not here to hurt anyo-errr...Anypony!" He still hadn't gotten used to that.

Ryback did not trust Marcus, but he trusted Fluttershy, however, and he helped Marcus to his feet, and even dusted off his coat with his hooves.

Marcus was about to thank Fluttershy for quite possibly, saving his life, but he noticed she she was once again, cowering at the sight of him. "It's alright, Fluttershy...I was telling the truth..." He whispered.

Fluttershy was still timid, but seemed to believe him, and had now gotten a bit more comfortable. She now stood back up, and smiled at Marcus slightly.

"What can I help you with?" Fluttershy asked sweetly.

"Pinkie Pie just wanted me to give you both this invitation..." He answered, handing Fluttershy the invitation, she began reading it. "She had me dress up like her, because she had to take her gator to the Dentist."

Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. "But...Gummy doesn't have any teeth."

Marcus sighed. "Fluttershy...How long have you known this girl?"

Fluttershy smiled. "Long enough."

"If you haven't figured out why she does the things she does by now...You're never going to..." He chuckled.

"She's unpredictable..." Fluttershy replied. "That's for sure..."

Marcus nodded. "By the way..." He began. "There's no need to fear me. I'm not, like, nuts or anything, I've just had a bad past, alright? I'm not too fond of ponies, but that doesn't mean I'm going too do anything I'll regret...."

Fluttershy smiled even more now. "Thank you. But, I'm always afraid of new ponies. You and all of your friends...Make me feel...Uncomfortable...." She gasped, and suddenly realized Marcus may take that as making fun of him. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that!" She exclaimed quietly.

Marcus sighed. "It's alright, Fluttershy, no need to apologize. Me and my friends are weird, we know, but we are also good people...Like this guy." He gestured towards Ryback, who waved at both of them happily.

"Oh yes, Ryback is very nice." Fluttershy replied, waving back at Ryback.

"Perhaps you will see us in a different light at the Party on Friday." Marcus suggested.

"Oh, yes!" Fluttershy excitedly replied. "I can't wait!"

Marcus smiled slightly. "Yeah....Me neither....See you guys." With that, he left the cottage without waving. He had one more destination, and that would be Carousel Boutique. He had already left a message at Cloudsdale, although he had to use Pinkie's hot-air balloon to reach the Clouds.

Many minutes Later.....

Carousel Boutique....

Marcus had reached his final destination, he had one invitation left. He hated all of the background and non-important ponies of the Show, and he STILL had to give invitations to them! Hell, some of them wanted to TALK to him! Horsepower had followed him for over a mile after getting his invitation, shouting "YEAH!" over and over again. Marcus had to resist the urge to punch the steroid Pony. He was afraid of Ryback, but Ryback was not all steroids, he was all power, Horsepower, however, Marcus knew he could take him because he had to use a certain substance to gain his power. Derpy followed Marcus a ways after getting her invitation, and went on and on, something about..."Muffins"? "I don't care if the fat bitch wants muffins..." Marcus said to himself. Doctor Whooves tried to persuade Marcus to visit a psychiatrist, so he could deal with his "Everlasting Sorrow" (HAHA! OLD TF2 NAME!) Marcus finally snapped, and told Doc. he would be "Visiting the hospital himself if he kept talking to him." So he ran off.

From Marcus had seen so far of Rarity, she was more....Mature than almost all of the other residents of Ponyville, this made Marcus less angry about having to hand out this last invitation. But what applied the anger back on, was the fact of who lived with Rarity....Good old sarcastic, Phil Brooks.....He could only imagine how much fun he would have with this.....Which brings up the question, why didn't Marcus just take the outfit off? That would be the WORST possible thing he could do....He would hurt Pinkie's feelings, because he knew she would already be home by the time he got back to Sugarcube Corner, and if she saw her costume thrown on the floor, she would break down and cry, and Marcus didn't want to have to deal with that shit....

He approached Carousel Boutique, and braced himself for the onslaught of laughter from CM Punk, he politely knocked on the door. "Coooommmiiinngggg!" He heard somepony say in a sing-song voice. A few moments later, and the door was opened, and inside stood Rarity, and CM Punk.

Marcus was shocked, but not because Punk wasn't laughing yet, he KNEW why Punk wasn't laughing....Punk was wearing a frilly red dress, and he did NOT look happy in the least bit. In fact, as soon as he saw who was at the door, he hung his head in shame. Finally, for the first time today, Marcus could see he wasn't the only pony made out to look like a fool today.

"Oh! Hello, Marcus, dear!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Ummm.....Hi, Rarity..." Marcus was too busy eyeing Punk's....Attire.

Punk shot Marcus a glare. "Take a picture, asshole...It lasts longer."

"Ho, I wish I had a camera..." Marcus said, chuckling. "I didn't realize I wasn't the only pony being paraded around in a...Non so suiting outfit."

"Yeah. Small world, huh?" Punk said, chuckling.

Rarity giggled. "Come on inside, please, Marcus." Rarity said, stepping aside to make room for Marcus. Marcus wanted to get this over with, but he also wanted to know how in the hell Punk could let Rarity wear such a manly-erasing getup.

"You tell me, I'll tell you..." Was the first sentence Punk spoke. Marcus groaned.

"Pinkie had to take Gummy to the dentist today...." He immediately noticed the odd looks on Rarity and Punk's faces. "Don't ask..." He continued. "So, she made ME pass out all of these invitations..."

Punk laughed. "In that ridiculous crap?!"

"I have no idea what the Pony thinks about..." Marcus said, shaking his head.

Rarity giggled. "Trust me, dahling, you will get used to her....Errr, unusual antics soon enough."

Marcus's eyes bulged. "HOW SOON?"

"It depends on how patient you are." Rarity answered.

"Pfftttt!!!!" Punk blew a raspberry. "Marcus is as patient as a hooker on pay-day..."

Rarity cringed at Punk's language. "Why must you always use such.....Unpleasant language?"

"Why must you always put me in these disgusting ensembles?" Punk shot back, smirking.

"I think you look ravishing..." Marcus said, snickering. Punk automatically gave him a dirty look.

"You would...." Punk retorted, causing Marcus to growl.

"He's right, you know." Rarity said, smiling. "You don't scream "HOBO" as much as you did before."

Punk wrinkled his nose. "And you sound less bitchy when you're asleep."

Rarity scoffed. "Looks like the dress didn't improve his crappy attitude, though..." Marcus added.

"Good." Punk said, smiling. "That's just the way I like it."

Rarity rolled her eyes, while Marcus snickered. "So anyway....How did....THIS happen?" He gestured towards Punk's dress.

It was now Punk's turn to groan. "It's really simple, actually.....This marshmallow bitch is so lonely she has no one else to try on her self-made dresses, so I automatically got picked..."

"Please, Phillip.....It hurts me when you say such things about me..." She sincerely proclaimed.

"And it hurts me when I have to wear dresses made for MARES." Punk replied. "Do I look like a MARE to you?"

"Yes." Marcus boldly stated, Punk just glared at him.

"You watch your mouth, Pink-Eye...." Punk said, accusingly pointing a Hoof at Marcus.

"I just needed someone to try on some of my new dresses for me..." Rarity explained. "I could've gotten ANY model I wanted, but I wanted Phillip. Because the red dress REALLY brings out his blue fur!" She stated with glee.

"Well, well..." Marcus began. "Seems like we both are in some sticky Situations..."

Punk laughed sarcastically. "This isn't funny...."

"It is for me." Marcus replied, smirking.

"Oh, just give us the damn Invitation!" Punk retorted impatiently.

Marcus obliged, and set the invitation in one of the Pockets in Punk's dress. "You jackass...." Punk said, looking down at his filled pocket.

Marcus chuckled. "You look like a jackass with that dress on." Punk stuck his tongue out at Marcus.

"Please, boys, let's calm down, now." Rarity said, getting in between the two.

"Geez, we're just messing around with eachother, you boss-mallow." Punk said, smirking.

"GRRRR...." Rarity growled. "TAKE OFF THAT DRESS....BEFORE I BURN IT OFF OF YOU!"

Punk quickly ripped the dress off his body, and threw it on the floor. "I knew I could win! The boss-mallow has been CONQUERED!"

Rarity gasped, and looked down at her destroyed creation. "I said take it off, not RIP it off!"

"Well darn..." Punk said, putting his hooves at his sides. "I guess I just CAN'T follow directions....What a shame...."

Rarity looked up at Punk with a glare that could kill. "Oh....It. Is. On....." Rarity replied, shooting daggers at Punk with her eyes.

"I'll leave you two to massacre eachother." Marcus said, chuckling. He quickly backed out of the door, and went back on his way to Sugarcube Corner.

Many moments Later.....

Marcus returned to Sugarcube Corner, and, just like he figured, Pinkie Pie was already back home, and she was was playing with Gummy, who had numerous cotton-swabs in the gaps in his mouth.

Pinkie gasped at Marcus's sight. "Hi, Markie!" She jumped up, and started hopping around Marcus. "Did you deliver all of the invitations?"

Marcus nodded, and placed the empty basket on the counter. "Although, I did not enjoy my work attire...."

Pinkie frowned. "Not a fan of Pink, huh?"

Marcus nodded his head. "It looks gay...."

Pinkie perked up again. "Gay as in happy, or gay as in...."

"The gay type of gay." Marcus interrupted, causing Pinkie to frown again.

"Don't worry, Marky!" Pinkie said, perking up once again. "You wont EVER have to wear the Pinkie costume again!"

"Thew..." Marcus said. "Awesome....But, Pinkie, I wanted to ask you something."

"Hmmm?"

"The party is Friday?"

"Yup!"

"Wont you, uh...Need more time than that? Friday is, pretty short notice....And a party takes a while to plan...."

Pinkie giggled at Marcus's naivety. "I'm fast at organizing Parties, Marky! Thanks to my party cannon!"

"Do you....Need any help?" Marcus asked, genuinely. He sort of felt bad that she had no one helping her.

"No thanks! ALL of Ponyville will be helping me! And besides, you can't see the development of your own party, silly!"

Marcus sighed. "I guess you're right...."

Out of nowhere, Pinkie hugged Marcus. Marcus felt like pushing the pony back, but for some reason, a feeling deep inside of him told him to let her continue hugging....And another feeling told him to hug her back! "Stupid feelings..." Marcus thought. "Ain't no fucking WAY I'm doing that!"

"Marcus?" Pinkie said, still hugging him.

"Y-yeah.....?" He slowly asked.

"I can't wait until the party!" She giggled.

Marcus smiled. "Me neither..." He replied.

Author's Notes:

IT'S BACK.

Party Of Ton

It was now Friday, the humans fifth day in Ponyville. This was sure to be the most eventful day so far. It was Party Day! The humans didn't have to do ANYTHING, all they had to do was sit back, and wait for the ponies to complete their party. It was THEIR party, and it sure was surreal to the humans. They expected to be shunned by all of Equestria, but they were opened with welcome arms by these ponies. Hell, even the surveyors of the land, the very powerful princesses of Equestria had their blessings.

They could only wish one thing, though....That their family and friends could be there with them. Freddie awoke for the first time since arriving, peacefully. He had been awoken by his sons every day since Monday, but today, the usual non-morning Freddie, was up at 8:13. His children of course, were gone, as today would be the last day of their first week of Ponyville school. Freddie smiled. He was quite proud of Damian, Kit and Tate. One full school, and he only had to go to ONE parent/teacher conference....That....Was a record! Freddie remembered one day, in fourth grade, Makayla Burgess and Deborah Killam had stolen his coat...

Flashback.....

October 14th, 1988...

Freddie was not doing what he was supposed to be....

It was past September, and was now the middle of October, leaves were scattered throughout the recess area of St. Clair's Edgar Murray Elementary. What was the problem you ask? Well, Freddie had asthma...He was born with it. Maybe it was from his mother smoking while she was carrying him in her stomach, which she denied doing, but Freddie doubted it. Freddie was okay in the Summer and Spring, he could play outside without any problems, and he was actually quite fast despite his issues, but when fall was approaching, and the temperature dropped into the upper 50's to lower 60's, Freddie started having problems. The cold air got to him, and he would be sick within minutes, no inhaler could help him, it was just a fact that Freddie would get sick if he went outside with strong winds such as this.

Freddie's fourth grade Teacher, Mrs. Kelly KNEW about Freddie's conditions, a doctor note had to be written every school year, and the teachers were to follow this. Because of this, during the Fall and Winter seasons, Freddie would have to walk up to the office, and sit at the table outside...He would always be the only kid there, unless there was a child who got in trouble, then they would accompany him at the table. Freddie was used to this daily routine for over half of the school year, and truthfully...He didn't mind it, he knew of the danger's of going outside.

But today....Was a special day.....It was the day, that kickball was brought back to recess. The privileges of it had been taken away from the children by, ironically, Freddie himself. Freddie was good at Kickball, the second best in his class, right behind "Steel Toe" Ian McQueen, who got his nickname from being able to kick the kickball back up to the pavement, and kickball was played WAAAAAAYYYYY back at the fence behind the swings, right next to the woods, so it way a pretty damn long way. Freddie, however, relied on strategy, rather than strength, he wasn't weak, he just didn't want to show off.

But, everytime Freddie went up to bat, it seemed like chaos ensued. As said, Freddie usually didn't kick the ball a far way, but he did kick the ball VERY hard....It was like a cannonball exploding out of a Revolutionary War cannon. And, unfortunately for Freddie, he usually kicked the ball towards the girls playing, and not the athletic girls either, he kicked it towards the girls who were either too fat, too scared of the ball, or a mixture of both.

It was truly annoying, and every single time, the girls either screamed and got knocked on their ass, or when they tried to catch it, they somehow jammed their finger....DOH! So, after a while of this, the game was taken away from recess, and now, all the kids had to do.....Was SWING....BLLLEEEEHH!!!!! Luckily, the day after it was banned, Freddie had to stay inside, and he never got to go outside again until the spring, so he was never chewed out by his classmates.

But now, after almost a year, kickball was BACK! Freddie knew he was supposed to stay inside, but his love for Kickball was too much....

"I'll just....Take my coat outside...." Freddie thought to himself. "No way I'll get sick with it on!" It was after lunch, and Freddie had now grabbed his large coat, and he put it on. And for super extra protection, he even zipped it up. It was safe to say, if this was July, Freddie would be dead from heat exhaustion.

A few moments later, Freddie was outside. Screw the swings, screw the basketball hoops (Which some didn't even have a hoop), and screw the jungle gym! Those were for the third graders....Kickball....WAS FOR THE BIG BOYS!

Freddie grinned widely as he saw that teams many kids were already making their way down to the field, he sprinted past all of the walking children within a matter of seconds, and was the first one to touch the kickball. The feel....The fine leather of the kickball brought back many great memories....Freddie was indeed in love.

Some of the kids laughed at Freddie as he nuzzled the ball with his cheek, fuck it, he loved this Ball, and would marry it if given the chance. And since St. Clair wasn't the richest school around, this was the same ball that was used when Freddie injured all those girls, there were even splotches of blood, and some old teeth marks on it, thank gosh none of the girls had AIDS, that would SUCK.

Team were picked, and Freddie was team Captain, along with his best Friend at the time, Ian McQueen. When it was Freddie's turn to bat, he figured he would get a hit, and didn't want to sweat too much, since sweat and wind would DEFINITELY give him a cold, so he took off his coat, and placed it onto the fence.

About 25 minutes later, and the game was Over. Ian and Freddie's teams had tied, as both of the team Captains were considered the two MVP's of the game, Freddie smiled, his favorite game was back, but he could already feel a sneeze coming on. He had gotten a cold. How would he explain this to his Mom? He would have to come up with another lie, which he was used to doing. Oh well, it was worth it. He went over to collect his coat, but he noticed it was gone....

"Oh no!" Freddie said aloud. "My coat!" He frantically searched around the area, he figured the strong wind must have blown it away, but he heard two girls giggling in the distance, he turned around, and saw Deborah Killam and Makayla Burgess, and they had his coat!

"Looking for this, hard-to-breath?" Deborah said, flaunting Freddie's coat in the air. It was one thing to steal his Coat, but to make fun of him for his own problems? That was low all in itself....

Freddie furrowed his eyebrows, and screamed at the top of his lungs, "GIVE THAT BACK, YOU POOPY-HEEEEEAAADDDSSS!!!!!!!!" The two fat girls gasped, and immediately dropped the coat in the dirt, and ran off screaming, "TEACHER! TEEAACHHEERR!!!!!"

Freddie thought nothing of it at the time, he just grumbled to himself, and went over to the dirt to pick up his coat. Luckily, it had no dirt on it, because if it did, those girls would get an earful of an even more obscene insult...

A few minutes later, Freddie returned to class, and unfortunately, those two same girls were in his fourth grade Class. Mrs. Kelly looked at Freddie disapprovingly.

"Go to the office, Freddie....." Mrs. Kelly said frustratedly. She handed Freddie a note, and pointed to the door. Freddie had no idea what this was about, but he looked down at the note and gasped.

"Calling children "Poopy-heads?"" Freddie repeated the contents of the notes to himself. "That's barely an insult! Most fourth graders cuss everyday!" Freddie growled. "Those tattle-tales...."

It all ended fine, though. Freddie didn't even get in trouble, but he had a cold for 4 days....And then 3 months later, kickball was cancelled once again! For good this time, too...

So yeah, the moral of the story is....Freddie's kids are more mature than him.

Freddie chuckled, and walked out of the barn. He walked to the Apple Family's house, and tried to open it, it was locked. He peered through the window, and saw no sign of Granny Smith asleep in her rocking chair. He figured everyone was just helping out with the party.

"This must be a BITCHIN' party if everyone is planning it!" Freddie exclaimed aloud. He rubbed his hoofs together in anticipation. "I just hope there's alcohol...A party isn't a party without alcohol!"


Meanwhile.....

Sugarcube Corner.....

Freddie was indeed right. Many of the ponies of Ponyville were gathered at Sugarcube to help plan the human's Party. They were holding the party at Town Hall, but were afraid the humans might see the party if it was so out in the open, so they would prepare it here, and would use Pinkie's party cannon to set it up at Town Hall when the time was right. Twilight was the party Organizer, of course, since she was the most organized.

"Umm, Rainbow Dash?" Twilight called out to the Pegasus, who was helping out with the decorations.

"Yeah?" Dash asked.

"Could you....Help Derpy with the banner?" Twilight gestured towards Derpy, who was painting the banner. Of course, her screwed up eyes weren't making it any better. She was also more paint all over the table than on the banner.

Dash cringed, and flew over to Derpy. "Derpy! What happened?"

Derpy frowned. "I just don't know what went wrong...." She explained. Dash facehoofed.

"Then why are you still painting?" Dash asked.

"I was trying to make it better!" Derpy cried.

"You did a great job..." Dash replied sarcastically.

Derpy glared. "Let's see YOU do any better."

Dash smirked. She loved a challenge. "Pfffttt! I can paint this thing in 10 seconds FLAT." She grabbed the paintbrush from Derpy, and began zooming around the banner at top speed. She had finished painting in no time.

"That was only 9 seconds...." Derpy exclaimed, crossing her arms.

Dash gulped. "Eh, I meant 9 seconds flat. Yeah, that's it!" She chuckled nervously.

"Nuh uh. You did it wrong, Dash..." Derpy accused.

"Oh, did I?" Dash asked, scowling.

"Yeah, you did....." Derpy answered. "And I think you KNOW what went wrong...."

Dash could not think of anything to say. Derpy was right, after all. "I.....Weeellll....You suck, Derpy...." She flew away, leaving behind a triumphant Derpy.

Twilight rolled her eyes. She checked "Banner" off of the list. She went over to Fluttershy, whose job was to teach the birds to sing something....UNIQUE.

"How are the birds coming along, Fluttershy?" Twilight asked.

"Well....ummmm..." Fluttershy stumbled quietly. "I don't understand, Twilight...."

Twilight raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"What do you mean by "UNIQUE"?" Fluttershy asked. Unique could mean many things, and Fluttershy needed a sample before she could teach her birds to sing a certain something.

"You're the expert, Fluttershy," Twilight answered. "You think up whatever you want. But it has to be ORIGINAL. You know, unique, like the humans."

"I'm not sure if I can come up with my very own number, Twilight..." Fluttershy responded with fright. "It's...too much pressure...."

Twilight smiled, and placed a hoof on Fluttershy's shoulder. "Don't worry, Fluttershy...You're the best at this! Don't you want to make the humans happy?"

"Well, umm....yes..." Fluttershy quietly answered. "But it will take a while to teach my birds on how to play a CUSTOM number..."

"We've got 10 hours, Fluttershy." Twilight said, remembering the time, it would ruin her reputation of being organized if she forgot what time the party started. "I KNOW you can teach these birds to sing their hearts out!"

Fluttershy smiled. "Y-you're right, Twilight....I CAN DO THIIIIISSSS!!!!!!!!" Fluttershy screamed, startling a bunch of the ponies, she giggled softly. "Oops....I'm sorry...."

Twilight giggled, but she couldn't check "Music" off her list just quite yet, but she had faith in Fluttershy's ability. She then walked over to Applejack and Big Mac, who were preparing a large amount of Apple treats.

"How are the Applelicious delicacies going, you two?" Twilight asked.

"Another batch'a the apple Pie just got done." Applejack answered happily. "Pinkie Pie sure is a speed baker! Right, Big Mac?"

Big Mac nodded. "Eeeyup."

No sooner than a few seconds later, Pinkie Pie burst through the back door of Sugarcube Corner, carrying cakes and pies of all kind. "Watch out, Everypony!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Lots of hot stuff coming through!" Pinkie almost lost her balance under the weight of all of the food, but was somehow able to place all of it on the table.

"Wow, Pinkie Pie!" Twilight said. "How are you so fast at this?"

Pinkie giggled. "It's a lot easier when you have such AWESOME helpers!" A few seconds later, Spike and Rarity walked outside wearing aprons. Oddly enough, Spike's apron read, "Kiss the Dragon."

"I think the apron speaks for itself, Rarity." Spike said, gazing at his crush dreamily. "So why don't you follow through?"

Rarity sighed. "Spike, we have more important things to worry about than YOUR needs.....I've got cake batter in my coat!"

Spike groaned. "Oh, but can't it wait? You shouldn't defy the words of the Apron."

"I'm quite sorry, Spikey wikey, but I MUST cleanse myself!" Rarity ran over to Pinkie. "Pinkie, dear, would it be alright if I could return home and tidy up?"

Pinkie laughed. "Of course, Rarity! Me and Spike are still a well-working machine, even without you!"

Rarity smiled. "Oh, THANK YOU, dahling! I will be back lickity split!" With that, she ran off at top speed, might as well be sweaty too.

Spike groaned. "Hmph. So much for generous..."

Many minutes later....

Carousel Boutique....

It was a long and tough run, but Rarity was able to get back home. She was drenched with sweat, but all of that along with the cake batter would be gone after a nice, steamy shower.

Rarity opened the door, and the first thing she saw, was CM Punk, glaring at her.

"Oh, um...Hello, Phillip." Rarity said, blinking.

Punk just sat up from the couch, and crossed his arms. "Where were you....?" He asked simply.

"I was helping Pinkie Pie prepare for your party." She answered.

"Well, that's all fine and dandy..." Punk replied, smiling. "But when I woke up, you weren't here, and I, had to make myself....THIS!" Punk held up a plate of ashes.

"....WHAT IN EQUESTRIA IS THAT?" Rarity gasped, jumping back.

"This....My marshmallow fiend.....IS TOAST..." Punk said, still glaring angrily at Rarity. "I can't make breakfast for shit, I've told you this...."

"I'm terribly sorry, Phillip." Rarity said sincerely. "But I had to help plan the Party!"

"You expect me to eat THIS?" Punk questioned. "Look at it....It's Burnt. Fucking. TOAST..."

"It's more than just burnt, dahling....It's disintegrated."

Punk's eyes bulged with rage. "I CAN SEE THAT....And the ashes....Are on YOUR hands!" He pointed a hoof at Rarity eerily.

"I'm....I'm..." Rarity had nothing to say, Sweetie Belle made better toast than this.....

"YOU killed this toast..." Punk proclaimed. "And now...YOU WILL EAT YOUR CASUALTY."

Rarity cringed. "You cannot be seri-"

"EAT IT!" Punk interrupted.

"Eating ashes, dear? That's......"

"Not ladylike?" Punk said, finishing Rarity's sentence. "I understand....But, I think we can agree, that this toast is DEFINITELY catlike!" Punk picked at Opal, and smashed her face into the burnt toast.

Rarity gasped. "OPAL!" Rarity rushed towards Punk, and was able to pull her out of his grasp. Punk just smirked evilly.

"How DARE you!" Rarity said. "I expected better of you, Phillip! You don't just feed innocent animals....Dead toast!"

"You have no one to blame but yourself..." Punk said, smirking. He then noticed the cake batter in Rarity's coat. "Hey, you've uh...Got something in your coat..."

Rarity sighed. "Yes, and now so does Opalescence, thanks to YOU. Excuse us, while we clean ourselves..." Rarity walked off towards the bathroom.

Punk looked at the burnt toast. He leaned down, and took a little lick, he immediately regretted it. "Oh my....Now I know how that damn cat Feels!"

Minutes later.....

Punk tip-hoofed into the bathroom. Opal had been washed, the burnt toast was now erased from her fur, Rarity was now washing herself. She was whistling some sort of tune, but Punk knew she wouldn't be for long. He crept up to the toilet, and flushed.

Rarity stopped whistling. "Good gracious....What is-AAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Rarity screamed at the top of her lungs as hot water poured all over her pony body. Punk laughed uproariously as Rarity's head peeked through the shower curtains.

"PHHHIIIILLLLIIIPPP!!!!!" Rarity screamed, glaring at Punk with fury in her eyes. "I'M GHOST!" Punk proclaimed, running out of the bathroom at top speed.

Punk ran out of Carousel Boutique as fast as he could, luckily, all of his other human friends were waiting for him outside.

"Oh thank GOD..." Punk said, looking up into the clouds, even though GOD wasn't even known of in the current dimension.

"Hey, Phil." Austin said, smiling. "You look glad to see us...."

"Course I am!" Punk said, hugging Austin unexpectedly.

"Next comes the Rape..." Nova whispered to Ze, making him laugh.

"Umm....Nice to see you, two buddy..." Austin said, chuckling awkwardly.

Phil's eyes bulged, he quickly stopped the hug. "Sorry, man, I'm just happy you guys are here...I need to get away from here."

"....The hell did you do?" Freddie asked, although he figured it was something horrible. They all got their answer when Rarity thrust open the front door.

"You....Did her?" Marcus said, snickering. Punk punched him in the arm.

Rarity was breathing heavily, with the same look Twilight had on her face for most of "Lesson Zero".

"Oh, hey Rars....." Punk said, chuckling. "Me and my friends were just going toooo..." He looked at his friends for an answer.

"We were going to the school!" Nova exclaimed. "Me and Ze are gonna yell at some kids!"

Rarity looked dumfounded. "The school gave YOU two jobs?" Nova and Ze nodded. "Oh my....Forgive me, dahlings, but...You don't seem like the Educational type."

"That's where you are wrong, Ms. Rarity. Ze and Nova are the new Gym teachers!" Ze corrected.

"That isn't much better..." Rarity thought. "I see....Well, do not be too hard on the foals, they have a future. And Phillip...When you get back.....I'd like to have a word with you...."

Punk gulped. "Alright. See ya, Rars'." The 7 humans walked off.

Rarity shut the door, still visibly angry, but she soon forgot all about the Shower incident, when another thought entered her mind. "Hold on a minute..." Rarity said aloud. "Did Phillip just call me...Rars'? Surely he isn't becoming...FRIENDLY with me..." Rarity laughed. "Oh, I HIGHLY doubt that! I'm surprised a beast such as him even has any friends!"

Meanwhile.....

"I knew it!" Marcus said. "You DID have sex with her!" Punk rolled his eyes.

"No, dum-dum...I flushed the toilet on her while she was taking a Shower." Punk explained.

"Dammit..." Marcus grumbled. "You can't get a disease that way!"

"Wait...So were allowed to go to school with Ze and Nova?" Punk asked.

"Yeah. We asked Ms. Peachtree if we could have some friends over on our first day, and she said YES!" Nova exclaimed happily, high-hoofing Ze.

"Does she not realize the school may be Burned down by the end of the day?" Freddie asked, snickering.

"If anyone is gonna be burning down the school..." Punk began. "It'll be me...I can't even make toast..."

"Haha! You fucking loser!" Marcus teased. "I've eaten sweets for Breakfast every day since coming here."

"You'll be too fucking Fat to be a Wrestler..." Nova said, laughing.

"Yeah? Well, I can STILL kick your ass." Marcus boasted.

"I never said you couldn't." Nova rolled his eyes. "See? You guys ALWAYS do this. You know we aren't Wrestlers, but you big tough bastards always threaten us...But nothing is even done!"

"Yes....Ze thinks you are all PUSSY'S!" Ze added.

Austin laughed. "You guys know we're just kidding."

"Yeah...There's NO WAY we're gonna mess with the big, bad Gym teachers!" Freddie snickered.

"Laugh it up, assholes..." Nova said. "But we'll all be having a job, while you guys will be unemployed because you wont be able to Wrestle as ponies!"

"It can't be THAT hard..." Austin said.

"I guess we'll find out tomorrow..." Marcus replied.

Many hours Later....

The torture was over...For now atleast. Another school week was now over. The foals busted out of the school doors, cheering their little hearts out. Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo noticed Ze and Nova, and their friends were the first teachers out of the building, and were going to return home.

"Mr. Ze! Mr. Nova!" Scootaloo called out to them. Ze and Nova turned around to meet the three little fillies.

"'Sup?" Was all Nova said, smirking.

"We just wanted to saaayy..." Scootaloo continued.

"....YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST. GYM TEACHERS. EVER!" The Cutie Mark Crusaders bellowed simultaneously. A tear formed in Ze's eye from the cuteness.

"And you guys suck, what Else is new?" Nova said, as he and Ze wave goodbye to the three fillies.

"Wow..." Sweetie Belle said, staring in awe. "They are SOOOOOO cool..."

"Ah know!" Apple Bloom said, a huge grin on her face.

And no, this is NOT ass-backwards land. Yes, these children were HAPPY to be told that they suck...But there is a reason for that. Ze and Nova taught the children their special "Backwards language", when they say "You suck", it really means they are saying "You rock". If they say, "You are a fucking loser who will eat a Monkey's anus", they really mean "You are a fucking cool guy who will eat a Monkey's banana".

All in all, the kids have taken a liking to Ze and Nova's type of teaching. They loved the way they spoke their mind, and the way that they cussed like a Sailor. Some of the kids were already looking up them as heroes, as they said what not a lot of other ponies had the guts to say.

"What did you think of Mr. Ze and Mr. Nova?" Damian asked Diamond Tiara as her and the three boys walked out of class.

Diamond Tiara scoffed. "I think they're losers....I mean, who curses in front of a bunch of innocent Children? They shouldn't even HAVE a job."

Tate liked Ze and Nova VERY much, but he didn't want to lose a friend. "I think they're losers, too!"

"Oh...Yeah..." Damian said, wondering if he should agree or not, because he too liked Ze and Nova. In fact, Diamond Tiara was the only foal who was not fond of them. Non-the-less, Damian gave in. "Yeah....They're losers..."

Kit looked at his brothers in worry. Ever since they became friends with Diamond Tiara, they followed her every bidding, it was almost like an Upbringing. It was like SHE was their leader, not Kit...Kit was used to being the leader, but he never actually ordered or bossed his brothers around, Diamond Tiara did, and when Kit called her out on it, and why she didn't boss him around, DT answered, "Kit, you are strong. You are not a follower, you are a leader, that's what you are going to be when you grow up, I can tell..Your brothers, however, need some guidance, I'm not bossing them around, I'm simply getting them ready for the orders YOU will be giving them, because sooner or later, they WILL be taking orders from you." Kit bought into it, no matter how much he disliked DT's tactics.

"Well, DT..." Kit began. "We have to go now."

"Yeah! Tate's gotta beat Scootaloo in a race!" Damian reclaimed.

"Yeah!" Tate exclaimed, as well.

Diamond smiled. "You beat her good..." She said with a wink, and she then started walking off. "Goodbye, boys!" She waved, and the boys waved back. Soon, though, they were face to face with the CMC's.

"You ready to do this?" Was all Scootaloo said, still angry at the boys. So were Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom, but she knew that sooner or later, they would be on her side, just like Applejack said.

"Oh yeah!" Tate said, obviously determined. "I'm gonna fry some Chicken!"

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Get your Scooter, and follow me. I've got the perfect spot to race." Tate obliged, and followed after Scootaloo, who was a few feet ahead of him.

"Well, we'd better go." Damian said, looking back at the other two CMC's. "Gotta go watch our bro BEAT that loser!" Kit got on his bike, and Damian sit in the wagon.

"Wait!" Apple Bloom began. "How're we s'posed to get there?"

"Not our problem." Kit said, almost ready to ride off, and leave the girls in the dust.

"We know the shortcut to the Finish line." Sweetie Belle said, trying to reel a ride from the boys.

"Yeh! And ya'll don't." Apple Bloom added. "So one'a us has ta ride dah bike, while dah other sits in dah back."

Damian and Tate looked at eachother. "She's got a point..." Kit said, Damian facehoofed. "You're right..." Damian replied, CURSE his brother for ALWAYS being right!

"Ugh....FINE." Kit said, giving up. "Who wants to steer us in the right direction?" The hell.....WHAT A HORRIBLE PUN!

Sweetie Belle smiled, and held a hoof up. "I will."

Damian and Kit, defeated, went to sit in the wagon with Apple Bloom. It wasn't what they wanted, but they got the Gentleman in them from their Father, and it was screaming at them to not leave the poor little fillies behind.

"Just so you know..." Kit continued. "We HATE this..."

Apple Bloom smirked. "Ah know ya do."

Many minutes Later.....

It was time. Time for the big Race. The venue of such an important event: The same area that Rainbow Dash and Applejack raced against eachother in the "Running of The Leaves". Scootaloo and Tate lined up their Scooters next to eachother's, although Scootaloo noticed Tate's was just a BIT across the start line.

"Hey!" Scootaloo yelled. "Push your scooter back, Cheater!"

"Nuh uh. I don't cheat!" Tate replied. "Only CHICKENS cheat!"

Scootaloo growled impatiently. "Ya know what? FINE! I'm still gonna beat you!"

"Ha! Yeah, well......Okay!"

Scootaloo rolled her eyes, this would be too EASY. Tate was the biggest moron she'd ever met! "Ready?" She asked.

"I should be asking you if you're ready to get CREAMED!" Tate said, laughing like an idiot.

"Shut up." Scootaloo retorted. "Ready..."

"Set..." Tate said, leaning forward, a determined look in his eyes.

"...GO!" Both Tate and Scootaloo said simultaneously, and with that, they were off. Rubber was immediately burned, as the ground had tire marks on it.

Tate only had a half inch of an advantage, since Scootaloo allowed him to cheat, but that didn't last long, as she caught up to him within a matter of seconds. The foals were going so fast, that two separate rock and dirt piles were beginning to form around them, and they would surely follow their trail throughout the whole race.

They had only been racing about 300 feet so far, but Tate was ALREADY worried. He had seen Scootaloo on that scooter of hers, and she was an absolute BEAST! Even he would admit it, they were no rules to this race, so he felt like just ramming her off the side of the trail and cruising on to victory, but he knew that would be a dick move, and there would likely be SERIOUS repercussions, so he dismissed the idea.

Neither of the two even snuck a glance at eachother, they were too focused on this race. Not only was this a battle of the Sexes, which would prove for the time being, which gender was better, Filly...Or Colt, but also, these two currently had a lot of anger pent up towards eachother. Scootaloo was basically betrayed by Tate for her worst enemy, while Tate doesn't believe it to be that way, he is mad at Scootaloo because she is a quote on quote "Bully", this race was very important for many reasons, it would probably do big business in Ponyville if tickets were sold, but it was just a classic battle between two rivals.

5 miles later....

Scootaloo and Tate's legs were KILLING them. They weren't running, but they did have to scoot their hooves against the ground a lot when their scooters slowed down. This was an evenly matches race. Sometimes Tate passed Scootaloo, sometimes it was the other way around. Other than that, the stats were pretty much shared, neither had cheated yet, and since the race was almost over, they likely wouldn't.

They were less than 500 feet away from the finish line, even Damian, Kit, Apple Bloom could see tiny figures in the distance.

"That's them!" Sweetie Belle said excitedly.

"COME-ON, TATE!!!!" Damian yelled.

"LES'GO, SCOOTS'! YOU GOT THIS!" Apple Bloom cheered.

Second after second, they got closer to the finish line. Second after second, they got more tired and tired, they weren't even going fast anymore. At the start of the race, they were as fast as Ussain Bolt, now in the closing feet in the race, they were as fast as Jeff Harbison.

"They're almost here..." Kit said, the anticipation was killing not only him, but everyone within this radius.

Even though they were both neck and neck close to eachother, Scootaloo was still confident. She didn't want this to be a tie, so, with all the speed she had left in her body, she began to scoot faster and faster, her scooter was picking up more speed. Tate gasped, as his dreams of being a victor were beginning to go down the drain.

"HERE SHE COMES!" Sweetie Belle exclaimed.

But, it was too good to be true. Less than 50 feet left, and of all things, a tire in Scootaloo's scooter hit a rock. It wasn't a giant rock, but it was big enough to stop Scootaloo's golden run. The force of the rock exerted against the scooter, and Scootaloo was launched off of the trail, not too far, though, her scooter did not move again, the rock had stopped it's momentum, and had knocked it over onto the ground.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle gasped. "OH NO!!!!!" They screamed simultaneously. Even Damian and Kit looked a little worried about Scootaloo's condition.

Tate had this in the bag....There was no way Scootaloo would be getting up, and even if she did, it would too late. Tate was less than 20 feet away from the finish line, but as the closing moments of this race Began, Tate....Felt something inside of him...Was it a feeling? Yes, it was...A feeling of guilt. Tate felt guilt. Guilt that he was going to win this race, he was going to beat Scootaloo. He wanted to beat Scootaloo more than ANYTHING, but....Not like this. He wanted a fair race, and that rock sure screwed that up.

Right before Tate's scooter crossed the finish line, he stomped his two back hooves onto the ground, causing his scooter to come to a halt. He looked back at Scootaloo, who was lying down, back first off of the trail. Since she wasn't even going that fast, she only got launched about 5 feet, so she definitely didn't break any bones. Non-the-less, Tate felt the need to...Go and check on her. He laid his scooter on it's side, and trotted over to Scootaloo as fast as he could. He looked down at her, and didn't know if she was unconscious, or just playing a trick on him, either way, he felt bad. So bad....He was about to do something he would regret.

Tate picked up Scootaloo in his front hooves. She wasn't too heavy for Tate, as he could even walk on his back legs while carrying her. Tate went over to Scootaloo's knocked over scooter, and placed it back up, he then lay Scootaloo onto it. Again, the scooter wasn't going fast, so the rock didn't pop a tire, or anything like that. Tate used his nose to push the scooter all 50 feet, down to the finish line. Right before reaching it, he stopped, and thought about this. He wondered if it was the right thing to do. Should he really, purposely lose to a GIRL? Even a girl he disliked. Even with how wrong it sounded, Tate knew....it sounded 10 times more right. His brothers and Scootaloo's two best friends watches, as Tate pushed Scootaloo, and her scooter, across the finish line, with himself tagging right behind.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle smiled warmly. Tate did the right thing. No matter how ignorant he and his brothers had been acting...Tate still did the right thing.

"Tate.....? You okay?" Kit asked, not knowing what was going through his brother's mind.

Tate smiled, and turned towards his brothers. "She won..." He replied. "So yeah, I'm fine."

"Wow..." Was all Sweetie Belle could say, looking down at Scootaloo. She looked eh okay, she just had a few scratches on her face.

"I only did it..." Tate began. "Because it was the right thing to do...."

Tate knelt down, and looked at Scootaloo. Almost as soon as his eyes met her closed eyes, they opened up. Scootaloo looked around, and noticed she was on her Scooter, but lying on her back.

"What...what Happened?" Scootaloo asked wearily, trying to shake the cobwebs.

"Ya crashed, Scoots!" Apple Bloom explained with happiness in her voice. "But Tate here picked you back up, and rolled ya across dah finish line!"

Scootaloo's eyes bulged. No way....No way would stubborn Tate let a GIRL beat him! No matter what the circumstances were...She must've been dreaming......

"Is....is that true?" She asked Tate. Tate slowly nodded. Scootaloo gasped.

"I only did it because I...felt bad for you." Tate said, suddenly smirking. "Yeah! That's right! I felt bad for the poor, stupid chicken. You only won because I LET you. You would NEVER beat me if we were matched! HA!"

Scootaloo smiled. She knew Tate was just trying to act all macho, but she knew the truth....She knew why Tate let her win...Because he wanted to stick his dick in her....Uhhh, yeah...

Scootaloo got up from her scooter, and looked into Tate's eyes. Tate looked as well, and as they did, they both felt feelings they had never felt before. Now...The feeling of guilt had left Tate, and that was replaced by......Like? HA! Never! Tate? Like a girl? Never gonna happen! And fuck you if you think it will!

But one moment later, those feelings left Tate's body and mind forever....At Scootaloo planted a small kiss on his cheek. Nothing too fancy, or long, just a plain old-fashioned love tap. But to those two, it was more that PLAIN....Fireworks shot off at that very same moment.

Scootaloo smirked. "Yeah, yeah, yeah...Keep talking." She replied. Tate was shocked, as was everyone else.

"Did...She just....?" Was all Damian could whisper to Kit.

"A-affirmative..." Kit replied.

"Come-on, girls..." Scootaloo said, gesturing for Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle to follow her. "See you at the party, Tate." She smiled, and grabbed her scooter, and that was it....Race over, relationship....BEGIN.

Damian waved a hoof in front of Tate's face, but it was no use....His face had now contorted into that, of a small boy....In love....

"Oh no..." Damian said, shaking his head. "Now he looks like a dope!"

Kit examined his brother's look more closely. "He kinda looks like Ed, from Ed, Edd n' Eddy."

Damian laughed. "He does! Hey, Tate, ya like buttered toast?"

All Tate could do was shake his head slowly. "No....I like Chicken Nuggets...."

One hour Later.....

"So, Mr. Lauranaitis.....You say you have an answer for why a multitude of WWE Superstars have reported missing?" Asked Stephanie McMahon, the CEO of the World Wrestling Entertainment.

"I do indeed." John Lauranaitis answered, a confident smile on his face.

"Well, let's hear it." Said Shane McMahon.

John cleared his throat. "We had the suspicion that Pyro-Zi was up to this, so, we searched his locker room, and upon inspection...We found....THIS." John placed the Dimensionomicon on the glass meeting table.

"What....IS THAT?" A clueless Stephanie asked.

"I'm not sure what it's called," John said, scratching the back of his neck. "But, I do know what the device does."

"And that would beeeeee...?" Shane asked curiously.

"It transports people to different dimensions." John answered simply.

Stephanie nodded, convinced so far. "How do you know what it does, though?"

"Well, we also found the blueprints to it inside of Pyro-Zi's locker..." John explained, setting the blueprints to the Dimensionomicon on the table, Shane and Stephanie looked over it. "It clearly states what the intention of the device is, but I don't know the name of it, since it is written in the alphabet. of the planet that Pyro-Zi is from."

"Good job, Mr. Lauranaitis." Shane said, giving him a thumbs up. "But...How do you plan to get those Superstars back?"

"Me and some handpicked talent will be going there within the hour. We will do our absolute BEST to insure that they come home." John said with a cheesy smile.

Stephanie and Shane gave eachother looks. "What other choice do we have?" Stephanie said to her brother.

"You're right." Shane replied. "Alright, John...We shall be seeing you soon, then."

"You two have a good night." John said, waving goodbye, and walking out of the corporate office.

"Is the plan a go?" Daniel Bryan asked, looking around to make sure no one could hear them.

John cheesily smiled once again. "That's right. They don't suspect a thing."

"Yes..." Daniel quiet said. "Now, I can get back the WWE Championship from that.....PUNK." He cringed at the thought of Phillip Brooks.

"And I," John continued. "Can become...The Chairman, the position I've always deserved in this company. After all, that's the only thing we all care about, correct?''

Daniel, Chase Hediger, Brock Lesnar, Christian, and Damien Sandow nodded.

"Duurrr....Ah just wanna see mah uncle AUSTEEN!" Jeff Ross hyuked.

"No, Jeff!" Chase said, waving his index finger in Jeff's face. "Don't you remember? Austin Ross is bad, just like my uncle is Bad! All cousins are bad, and thanks to people like us...Everyone is going to figure that out." Jeff and Chase had formed an Alliance against their two Uncles ever since Over the Limit, although so far, it seemed like Jeff wasn't getting the point.

"Urrrr...Oh...Huh huh...Yeah." Jeff said, one of his eyes moving like it was a google eye.

"Why do we have to bring this MORONIC miscreant with us?" Damien asked, pointing at Jeff, who was picking his nose.

"Do not talk to the members of my Alliance like that, Damien!" John scolded the martyr, who just scowled in response. "Jeff will be a big part of this Plan, just like all of you will!"

"READY TO GO, BOSS?" Lesnar asked John, shooting himself up with roids while he talked.

"I am if you all are." John replied, and everyone else nodded. "Great."

"How does this thing even work?" The World Champion Christian asked, as everyone else went outside.

"Well, since I don't know exactly where they landed...I'll have to press the "Teleport to Last Destination" button." John did so, and immediately, a giant vortex appeared, sucking the Human dictionary, the whiny Canadian, the overpowered jock, the uber-hick, the maniacal-Missourian, the "Yes"-Man, and the Corrupt corporate official in.

Moments later, the 6 heels, and the one lone face, landed in Equestria. They landed in the same field that the humans did, and just like the Humans at first, they were...Well, still humans.

"Ugh..." Said Lesnar, rubbing his head. "Not even steroids can help me with this shit..."

"Where in the Great Gaspy are we?" Damien asked, rubbing his chin with his thumb and index finger.

"Hur hur...Ah think we's in heaven!" Jeff suggested, derpily looked at his surroundings.

"Shut up, corn-rows." Christian said, laughing at Jeff's stupidity.

"Hey! Leave him alone!" Chase growled. "You're uncle is nice! You have no right to talk!"

"Everyone just calm down..." John said, putting his hands up. "Let's just...Have a look around....They obviously landed in this exact same spot, because the machine says so. So they have to be around here somewhere."

"I agree." Bryan said. "Lead the way, sir."

"Thank you, Daniel..." John said, smiling at his Number 1 ass-kisser. "You all should act more like Daniel..."

"Yes, you should..." Daniel said, a Halo appearing above his head.

"SUCK MY DICK." Lesnar said, following John.

"Please, refrain from such language...You bumbling buffoon..." Damien said, cutting past Lesnar.

"SUCK....MY...DICK...." Lesnar repeated, causing Sandow to scoff.

"This plan is doomed thanks to all of you retards..." Christian said, laughing at his competition.

"YOUR MOTHER IS DOOMED THANKS TO MY DICK." Lesnar retorted.

All John Lauranaitis could do was shake his head, this plan would not work if everyone killed themselves right in front of him....."IF YOU ALL DON'T MOVE YOUR ASSES, YOUR FIRED!" John shouted, which caused all 6 of his men to shut up and start walking side by side.

John grinned. "Good...."

Meanwhile.....

"What's the password?" Horsepower, the bouncer of the party said.

"It's our party, asshole!" Nova shouted, ringing the ears of many People in line.

"WHAT'S. THE. PASSWORD?" Horsepower repeated the question.

"Ummmm....Yeah?" Austin answered weakly.

"EEEEEEEEHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Horsepower sounded off like a buzzer.

"YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Nova screamed at the top of his lungs, which even startled Horsepower himself.

"......YYYYEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You're right, bros!" He stepped aside, letting the humans pass.

"Someone should of just told me to freaking Yell, then..." Austin said, rolling his eyes.

"HI GUYS!" Pinkie said, as her and the Mane 6 approached the humans. "HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR PARTY?"

"It sucks." Marcus said, which earned him an elbow in the gut from Freddie. "I mean....It's grreeeaaatt...Yup, juuusstt grreeeaatt...." He coughed.

"We really can't thank you enough, girls." Austin began. "No one has ever thrown all of us a Party before."

"It is the least we can do for you, dears!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Yeah! Ponyville hasn't been this much fun in a while!" Rainbow Dash added.

Applejack noticed that Ze was about to cry. "Ze, what's wrong, Sugacube?"

Ze let it all out, crying a fountain of tears. "You....You....YOU ALL CARE FOR ZEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!" The Mane 6 were taken aback at all of the emotion by Ze.

"There there, buddy..." Nova said, hugging his friend.

"THEY...THEY CARE FOR ZEEEEE!!!!!!!" Ze repeated.

"Yeah, I know." Nova said, chuckling.

Suddenly, a shed pulled up right in front of Town Hall, it was driven by a colt, one who looked like he was....Pussy-Whipped. Whoever was inside the shed, must be very famous.

Oooooorrr....Not.

"The GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie.....HAS RETURNED!" Said Trixie as the shed door's opened up. Many of the citizens groaned loudly. "Yes, yes, Trixie knows you all love her, but please, continue partying!" Trixie walked over to the Mane 6 and the Humans.

"Hello, Trixie." Twilight said, smiling at her....Friend? She must've been, she helped all of Equestria vanquish Nightmare Doctor, she was a hero, basically. "How did your Magic touring go?"

Trixie lowered her head in shame. "Trixie's fans....They, they all....Booed Trixie! They must not know greatness when they see it!" Trixie laughed obnoxiously.

"I'm awfully sorry it didn't work out for ya, Sugacube." Applejack said.

"Oh no, do not fret, for Trixie is not phased by their boos! Because Trixie knows that she can atleast come back home to Ponyville, and know that her BIGGEST fans are here!"

"Uuuuhhh.....Yeaaahhh...." Rainbow Dash said sarcastically.

"Well, well, well..." Trixie said, noticing the humans. "Who are these ponies? More fans of the GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie, I presume?"

"Most likely not." Twilight said, Trixie gasped. "They aren't even from this dimension....."

"Really?" Trixie said, obviously impressed.

"Yes. By an evil force, known as Emperor Pyro-Zi." Austin explained.

"Pyro-Zi, huh?" Trixie snorted. "He is no match for the GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie! Oh, where are Trixie's manners? Let me introduce myself...I....Am-"

"The great and powerful Trixie..." All of the humans impatiently said.

"No! You must add the emphasis on GREAT, and POWERFUL! Like so!" Trixie said, smirking. Ze looked at Trixie, and for some reason, felt...Different.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Trixie..." Ze said. "Ze's name is Ze."

"Ze...." Trixie repeated the name, liking the way it sounded. "Trixie likes that name.....Trixie wants to get to know Ze a bit more...."

"Ummmm....Really?" Ze said, his confidence perking up.

"Yes, really! Come, let us...."Talk" in Trixie's carriage..." Trixie led Ze into her shed, and shut the door.

Nova immediately pulled out his phone, and called a Number. "Hello? Pony sluts R us? Yeah, I'm sorry, but you're gonna need to cancel that order I placed....Yeah, my friend Ze hit the JACKPOT!" Nova hung up the phone, and received nothing but stares. "What?!"

"Hey, is there ummm....Any alcohol at this Party?" Freddie asked hopefully.

"Nope, sorry Fredzo, but there are kids here!" Pinkie answered, giggling.

Freddie groaned, but got an idea when he noticed the already empty punch bowl. He grinned. "Say, Pinkie, mind if I refill the punch bowl for ya?"

Pinkie hopped up and down. "Aww, that'd be super!"

"Great! Come-on, Nova..." Freddie said, gesturing towards the punch, Nova followed.

"YYYYEEEAAAAHHH!!!!!!!! LET'S PAAARTTTYY!!!!!!!!!!" Horsepower shouted, jumping headfirst into a cake.

"I like the way you think!" Pinkie said, diving into another cake, and swirling it up with her tongue.

"That's.....Fucking gross..." Marcus said, suddenly not feeling hungry anymore.

Meanwhile.....

Sugarcube Corner....

Back inside Sugarcube Corner, Freddie and Nova were adding the very SPECIAL ingredient to the punch.

"Heh heh hehhhh..." Freddie chuckled, pouring a pink-like liquid into the bowl.

"You REALLY want that liquor, don't ya, Fred?" Nova said, grinning as he watched his friend continue pouring.

"This party blows without something to liven it up!" Freddie said as the bowl was not filled to the top of the rim.

"Okay, but don't come crying to me when you wake up with AIDS in he morning..." Nova said.

"Yeah, yeah. Got it, Mom." Freddie replied, brushing Nova off. They then soon returned to town with the liquid, and placed it on the Table. Pinkie immediately hopped up to it.

"Mmmmm.....That punch looks YUMMY!" Pinkie grabbed a cup-full of the stuff, and guzzled it down. "Whoa! It's got a certain PINCH to it!" She quickly poured herself another cup.

Soon, all of the party was over at the table, trying some of the Punch, but CM Punk was particularly suspicious....He leaned down by the punch, and sniffed it. His face immediately contorted into that of an angry individual.

"I. Smell. Alky....." Punk said, flaring his nostrils. He ran up to Austin, and knocked his glass out of his hands before he could take a drink.

"Hey! The hell, man?" Austin said, frustrated.

"Don't drink that! It's Alcohol!" Punk cried.

"How do you-"

"I COULD SMELL IT....." Punk interrupted. Austin fully believed him, Punk had done this many a time at Party's, and he always warned Austin of it. Austin only drank when he was around his wife, so nothing...Fishy would happen.

"Am I the only one safe?" Austin asked worriedly.

"Marcus hasn't taken a drink yet, and I sure as hell hope he doesn't. We don't need Drunkus at this party, that's for sure!" Punk cringed at the thought of a drunk Marcus running around in a toga.

"What about the children?"

"I was able to round them up into the corner. Told them that was big pony juice, and if they drank it, they would grow tentacles. Thank god none of them think tentacles are cool..."

Austin nodded. "Sweet....So, everyone else is gonna get drunk?"

Punk looked down at the ground sadly. "Yes, they are all doomed....To act like complete, and utter....JACKASSES." DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNN.....

"My god....." Austin said, quickly praying. "I don't know, how bad could it be?"

Many minutes later.....

Ya had to ask, didn't you?

"Here...." Fluttershy said, pouring alcohol down her bird's throats. "Gotta drink up if you guys wanna be.....UNNIIQUUEE...." Fluttershy's wings gave out, and she fell to the ground. The birds only needed one drink, and they were unconscious.

"Oh my..." Fluttershy said, puking. "I feel....GREEEAAATTT..."

Pinkie Pie wasn't hopping, she was spinning around like a top, and hadn't gotten busy in the slightest.

"Pinkie....Are you okay?" Marcus asked, walking up to Pinkie. He'd soon regret it, though, as he too was picked up in her tornado.

"Oh, hi, Marrkkkehhh....Ya wanna spin with me toooo?" Pinkie slurred.

"Goddammit, you're drunk!" Marcus yelled.

Pinkie hiccuped. "Drunk? Oh, yur silleh, Markeh...I'm not....Drunkkkk.....Silly, silly, silly, silly, silly, silly.....SIIIIIILLLLYYYYY!" She flicked Marcus's nose with her hoof.

"Pinkie, stop spinning RIGHT NOW." Marcus ordered.

"Ooohhhh....Kay...." Pinkie stopped, and the momentum launched Marcus into another cake.

"Grrrrr....." Marcus brought his face up from the cake. Pinkie hopped over to him, albeit a but clumsily, and licked all the icing and batter off of his face.

"Mmmmmm....You taste like yum....I wonder what your wiener tastes like, doe...." Pinkie advanced towards Marcus, she had a mix of a drunk and lustful stare in her eyes.

"Oh shit!" Marcus panicked. "This ain't how it works in the hood!" He ran away from Pinkie as fast as he could.

"Hey....Get bak hur.....I needa test yuuurrr...." Pinkie couldn't finish her sentence, as she passed out.

"Hey...Look at me, everyone....I'm Derrrppeehhh..." Rainbow Dash slurred, flying around horribly in circles.

"Hey!" Derpy whined, crossing her arms. "You need to act more stupider than that!"

Dash crashed head first into the ground, she kept digging, and digging, and digging deeper, until finally....

One dimension over.....

Dash's head popped up. She looked at where she was. She could see a bunch of large buildings, getting destroyed by a giant lizard in the distance, numerous people were fleeing the area, running and screaming bloody murder, this was obviously a crisis...But Dash found it to be cool.

"AWSUUUUMMMM..." Dash said, drunkenly gazing over at the carnage the monster was causing. An Asian man ran up to her.

"小马驹!快跑!你为什么不跑?!这是严重的!哥斯拉是回来了!哥斯拉已经返回摧毁;中国!你看不到的突变高的水平,这是造成?!要跑!要跑!要跑!!!!!!" (Translation: Little pony! Run! Why you not run?! This is serious! Godzilla is back! Godzilla has returned to destroy all of China! Do you not see the high level of catastrophe this is causing?! RUN! RUN! RUN!!!!!!!!!!!)

"Kuuullll..." Dash said happily as Godzilla had now grabbed the Asian they was trying to warn her, and had eaten him in one bite. Godzilla looked down at Dash, and gave a menacing roar.

"Aww yeh? Yah don't scur meh...." Dash drunkily crawled out of the hole, and kicked Godzilla right in his tiny nuts. I guess it was true what they say about the Asians, because HOLY SHIT were they tiny!

Godzilla fell over in pain at the nut-shot, and crushed numerous buildings on his way down. It was official, a innocent little pony....Could cause more damage to China than Godzilla.....But why the hell was he in China, though? Must be lost....Dash plowed back into the hole, and was back in Ponyville in no time.

"That....Was so dum kewl...I men....WUW...I just..." Dash too now, was unconscious.

Applejack and Big Mac were in the middle of Town Hall, having drunk sex as Apple Bloom looked on.

"Applejeck? Big Mec? WHAT'RE YA'LL DOIN' TA EACHOTHER?!"

"HEH HEH HEEEEEHHHHH....." Was all Big Mac could say as he filled Applejack's stomach with his cum. How lovely.....

Applejack and Big Mac slumped onto the ground, and from a mix of exhaustion and downright drunkenness, passed out, with Big Mac's dick still inside Applejack's pussy.

Apple Bloom looked on at her passed out siblings. "Wow!" She thought. "That looks like fun! Maybeh ah can try it with Kit when we become friend again!"

Oh, such great Role models these ponies are.....

"Hey, Austin, how ya doing?" Punk asked, limping up to his friend.

"Well, besides Twilight licking my ear..." Austin began, as Twilight began licking all of his face like an ice cream Cone. "....I'm doing pretty good!"

"I'll put a spell on you.....Because you're MIIIIIIIINNNNNNEEEEEE..." Twilight drunkily sang in between licks.

"Keep practicing, Twi...You'll get better..." Austin sighed. "Someday....."

"Ha!" Punk laughed. "You think YOU'RE in hot water? Look at this shit!" Punk cried as Rarity was still clenched onto his legs, grinding them with her pussy.

"Well, this SUCKS!" Austin screamed, pushing Twilight away for his hoof.

"I know..." Punk complained. "Let's go home...It's 1:00 in the morning."

"Yeah, good idea. Be good girl, Twilight...I'll see you tomorrow."

"If you could see that I'm the one who understands you.....Been here all along so why can't you see? You belong with me.....You belong with me......" Twilight sang, gazing up at Austin with her creepy Lesson Zero smile on her face.

"How the hell does she know Taylor Swift?" Punk asked, shaking his head, Austin just shrugged. Punk began shaking his legs, desperately trying to get Rarity off.

"Your dick shall be MINE!" Rarity screamed as she was staying hung on like a Sloth on a tree-branch.

"Get the hell off, you evil BEAST!" With one final shake, Punk was able to get Rarity off. Punk raised his leg, and Rarity slid down it like a Firefighter, and landed on the ground unscathed.

"Well, this sure was a party to remember...." Punk said, laughing along with Austin as they walked off to their homes.

Twilight and Rarity looked into eachother's eyes, opened their mouths, and simultaneously shared their own puke. The vomit dripped like a faucet as the two mares passed out.

Over at the large food table, though, Freddie was still awake, he was only a few of the ponies still awake, actually. He began singing. "I'll drive a million miles To be with you tonight....So if you're feeling low.....Turn up your radio.....The words we use are strong....They make reality...But now the music's on....Oh baby dance with me yeah. Rip it up, Move down, Rip it up, Move it down to the ground, Rip it up, Cool down, Rip it up, And get the feeling not the word.....Ev'rybody have fun tonight....Ev'rybody have fun tonight.....Ev'rybody Wang Chung tonight....Ev'rybody have fun tonight....Ev'rybody Wang Chung tonight...Ev'rybody have fun......"

"WOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Nova screamed, clapping his hooves in drunken excitement. "FUCK YEAH! FUCK YEAH!!!!! ENCORE!!!!!! ON-FUCKING-COOOOORREEEEE!!!!!"

Nova would never get his encore, though, as Finally, Freddie fell off the table, face-planted, and passed out.

Nova laughed out loud. "Fucking....Pussy...." Right then and there, though, Nova fell on the ground, and passed out as well.

All that was left awake, was Ryback, who had been spinning around, executing ballet moves since he became drunk.

"Alright, Punk...Where's my Championshi-" Daniel Bryan was about to finish his sentence, but paused when he saw the carnage.

"Perhaps, we should come back during a better time..." Sandow suggested.

"Uhhhh.....Right!" John said, gesturing towards his allies to walk.

"Hurr, hurr....Dumbasses." Was all Jeff could say, as he began walking back with his boss.

Trixie stepped out of her shed, looking around intently. She chuckled at what she saw. There was vomit, spilled beer, and passed out ponies as far as the eye could see. She went back inside her shed, and shut the door.

"They sure were making a lot of noise earlier..." Trixie continued. "But now, the noise has stopped, the party has been crashed, the night...Is Trxie's....And Ze's." She trotted over to Ze, who was chained up on a wall, and whipped him with a riding crop.

"Ze may have scars all over his body, but he wants you to know, oh SEXY and WICKED Trixie....He enjoys this very much."

"Of course you do! The CUNNING and IN CONTROL Trixie knows what she is doing!" Trixie boasted. "And since you, Ze, are my number one fan....You get special treatment..."

"Thank you, mistress! Your punishment is very welcom-"

"You do not talk while Trixie....WHIPS you into shape!" Trixie proclaimed, smacking Ze with the riding crop once again.

All of a sudden, out of the corner of the screen, Piggy Pie popped up out of nowhere.

" "Th-Th-Th-Th-Th-... That's all, folks!" Piggy Pie exclaimed, as she puked all over your Television screen.

------TO BE CONTINUED-------

The Island of Misfit Poise

The Next Day.....

Town Hall....

It was now Saturday, one night after the infamous "Ponyville Plunder". That's what everyone would be calling it from now on. From the events that transpired, it looked like everyone had a great time....If only they could remember it. Big Mac and Applejack had drunk sex in front of Apple Bloom, giving her some unsanitary ideas of how she could spend her time with Kit, Freddie sang karaoke for much of the night, but he was not able to keep his usual angelic singing voice while he was drunk, so the lyrics just came out as gibberish.

Ryback twirled around like a ballerina, Fluttershy got her birds drunk so she could be drunk friends with them, Nova screamed for much of the night, Pinkie ate a lot of sweets, and the sweets combined with an unholy amount of alcohol to create enough vomit to make a giant pool for half of the Population of Idaho, Twilight and Rarity shared their puke with eachother, but not before licking the ear of Austin, and grinding their gears against CM Punk's thighs respectively.

Rainbow Dash pretended to be Derpy, totally oblivious to her surroundings, she crashed into the ground of Equestria numerous towns, soon enough, she would be in China, where she was able to destroy Godzilla. I'm sure the Chinese will have a statue prepared for her the next Eon she returns....

Luckily, none of the children consume ANY alcohol, thanks to persuasion from Punk, Austin and Marcus, and while the parents of the kids made complete asses of themselves, Punk, Austin and Marcus volunteered to take the children to their homes, thank gosh the parents complied to give them their keys, or else the kids would have to watch the whole ordeal.

The facts are, only 5 ponies in Ponyville, excluding the kids, did NOT get drunk last night: Austin, Punk, Marcus, Trixie and Ze. Although Trixie and Ze were fucking the whole night, it still counts.

The sober ponies went to their own houses, and they left all of the drunk ponies to slip unconscious, and sleep the night away on the ground. You could say it was a little harsh, but it's their fault for drinking the shit!

If anypony should get the blame, though, it should be Freddie. Freddie filled up the punch-bowl with some type of Pink alcohol, similarly the same color as punch, it was called "Fuchsia Fields".

Ironically enough, the beholder of the chaos, Freddie Hediger, was the first to wake up, what he first noticed was the humongous mess around town hall. There was a lot of vomit, and a LOT of sleeping ponies. Freddie groaned.

"Dammit..." Freddie thought. "I shouldn't have done that..." Freddie of course, had a hangover, as would all of the other ponies when they woke up. Freddie experienced hangovers quite frequently over the course of his life, he was 31, and surprisingly enough, the usually mischievous Freddie actually waited until his 21st birthday to go on his first binge of alcohol. He could remember it very fondly....

Flashback.....

November 12th, 2002....

"HERE IS YOUR WINNER...FAAAREEEDDDIIIIEEE....HEEEDDIIIGGEERRRR!!!!!" Shouted Howard Finkel over the microphone. Freddie had just beaten Triple H in the main event, at a house show in Portland, Oregon, it was non-title, as Triple H was the World Heavyweight Champion at the time, but the win still kept Freddie near the top in contention for the World Title, but Freddie had bigger things to worry about right now...It was his 21st birthday, and he had been looking forward to it for quite some time.

Freddie rarely followed the rules, which he took after his parents. The first time his dad drank Alcohol, he was 15. The first time his Mom smoked a cigarette, she was 9. Now one thing Freddie vowed he would NEVER do, was smoke a cigarette, the smell was awful, Some days, Freddie didn't even need an alarm clock, the hacking of his mother was all he needed to be awoken. Freddie NEVER wanted to see his children to see him like that, so he made a promise to never even get into cigarettes. Sure, peer pressure followed him through 8th grade, all the way until he graduated from high school, but Freddie kept his promise, and he has still never lit a cigarette in all of his days, and he still keeps the intention that he never will.

Alcohol, however? Freddie was interested in it. It smelled better than cigarettes, and most definitely tasted better, too. Freddie would find his dad, passed out in a chair almost every night, due to his father being a heavy drinker. This sometimes worried Freddie. He would always call his father "Pathetic" in his mind when he walked by and saw him slouched over in his Lazy-Boy chair. But, even with all of the horrible things those people that came to Freddie's school twice a year said, Freddie wanted to know what alcohol tasted like. But, Freddie believed those motivational speakers as well, he believed them when they said that alcohol could take people's lives, but Freddie knew that when they day came....He would be very, VERY careful of how he went about it.

He also promised that he would not drink alcohol until he was 21, even though many times a day, Freddie felt the urge to just get a fake ID, go into a Mini-Mart, and buy some brewskis.

Of course, this, was impossible. Freddie was a big star in Music when he was 15, and a lot of the human population knew what he looked like, and knew how old he was. Freddie could have just used a disguise, but he didn't feel like going through all of that trouble just for some alcohol.

So, he waited, like he said he would. It was a better improvement then when he said he would never do Drugs, but that didn't work out. But that's a different flashback, for a different time.

"Hell of a match, Freddie." Said The Undertaker, the American Bad-ass. He patted Freddie on the shoulder.

Freddie laughed. "Thanks, Deadman. There's no better feelings than going out on your 21st birthday, kicking ass, taking names, and sending the crowd home happy."

Undertaker nodded respectfully. Freddie reminded him a lot of a younger him. They had the same work ethic: The fans matter more than the paycheck. They didn't kiss Vince McMahon's ass, and they weren't in this for themselves, 'Taker taught Freddie all of this when he first came to the WWE in 2001. Most people in the locker-room shunned Freddie for being "Just some punk music kid who thinks he can makes it in REAL entertainment", but Taker could see Freddie had the passion for the business that he hadn't since, well, himself. Taker took him under his wing, and when everyone noticed that the Rookie was hanging out with the Captain of the locker-room, which The Undertaker was, they started to hang out with Freddie too.

"About that..." Taker began. "It IS your 21st birthday, and I'm kind of parched...So, do you wanna go raise some hell at the bar?"

Freddie grinned from ear to ear. The Phenom was asking him to go to the bar! If there was anyone he'd like to get drunk with, the answer would be the living legend himself, The Undertaker.

But, unfortunately...Freddie already had plans. Plans he PROMISED he'd make.

"I'm really sorry, Deadman..." Freddie replied. "But I already made plans to hit the clubs with Jeff." (Hardy, that is.)

Taker smiled understandingly. "Hey, no problem, man. We can raise hell some other time."

Freddie grinned. "Hell yeah! Course!"

Undertaker chuckled, and began to walk off. "You have the time of your life, Hediger. Bag some chicks for me."

Freddie laughed. "I would expect nothing less from myself!" He then walked off to find one of his more....Err, unstable friends, Jeff Hardy. He found him in his locker room, all dressed up and ready to go.

"What's up, man?" Jeff asked as he hugged his friend. "Ready to get the hell out of here?"

Freddie smiled. "Course, man, I'm ready to taste the wonders of alcohol!"

Jeff laughed. "Alright, alright, that's what I like to hear..." He then went to his locker-room door, and closed it shut. "But, uh....Why you in such a hurry?"

Freddie was a bit curious to know Jeff was talking about, but he was still smiling. "So I can go drink some beer, Jeff!"

Jeff chuckled. "We've got all the time in the World for that! This is your birthday, man...." Jeff then pulled out a bag containing white powder. "So let's get WICKEEEDDD!"

Freddie stared at the bag, he knew EXACTLY what it was....Cocaine. Atleast Jeff was doing the light stuff this time around....However, Freddie had NO interest in it.

"Fuck no, dude..." Freddie replied, putting his hands up. "I'm trying to get drugs out of my life. Besides, you don't wanna get suspended, do ya? You barely got through the last drug test they did."

Jeff chuckled. "Don't sweat it, man...This company's drug policy BLOWS! They only give us one a year, and even then, they do it all half-assed! I've got nothing to worry about."

"What about your health, though, man?" Freddie retorted, scrunching his nose in disgust. "Cocaine is one thing, but we're going out to drink in a few minutes! You don't mix both of those together, dammit!"

Jeff sighed in frustration, and threw the bag back in his saddlebag. "Fine, man.....But you REALLY need to live life to it's fullest."

Freddie rolled his eyes. "It's kind of hard to live your life to it's fullest when your buried 10 feet in the ground." He said angrily.

Jeff just chuckled. "Okay dude, sorry. I wont put you in these situations anymore. Now can we PLEASE just go get fucking wasted?"

"Yeh." Freddie said in his imitation of an African American.

--------------------------------------

Jeff drove to the place known as "Strip n' Stagger". It was a Nude Bar, featuring some of the sexiest ladies in Portland. It was well known across the area, and Jeff and Freddie decided to see what all the fuss was about.

--------------------------------------

Freddie and Jeff sat at Table/Strip area. Jeff was definitely hammered, but Freddie was not, and had no intention of getting drunk on his 21st birthday. Freddie loved women, some would call him a quote on quote "Man-Whore", which Freddie thought was a little harsh, you can NEVER have too much of a good thing, after all. He first had sex when he was 16, with one of his groupies, then the next night, he had sex again with a different groupie. And then the next night, and many nights after that, he banged chicks. He was still only 21, but he had slowed down with the sex a little bit, as he didn't want to dig himself an early grave. Freddie wanted to find his future wife, and that was one reason he want to so many strip-clubs. Yes, it may sound odd, but Freddie thought it would be the perfect place to find that certain someone for him.

Just when Freddie was about to give up, as he had figured out that this place wasn't worth the hype. There were too many white girls, and yeah, Freddie was Caucasian, but he also had German, Swiss, Swedish, and Native American in him, so he wanted to find a girl with a nationality he didn't have. So far, this place only supplied white girls.

"Comeon, Jeff...Let's blow this joint." Freddie suggested to a drunk Jeff. All Jeff did was give Freddie his phone in response, to kill his brother Matt. Freddie was about to dial the numbers, when he saw.....HER.

An incredibly sexy female, dressed in what you would think strippers would wear, but this stripper was....Different. For once, Freddie could tell, even though he had a few drinks inside of him, that this girl was CLEARLY Hispanic. Freddie gave the phone back to Jeff, and took a seat once again. He watched the girl work the pole like he had never seen before, in turn, his penis grew larger than it ever had in his life.

Freddie could see that each time the girl spun around on the pole, her eyes were on HIS. Freddie's heart skipped a beat everytime this happened. This sexy thing was watching him, probably because she knew who he was. He decided he couldn't take it anymore, he NEEDED to have this girl in his life!

"I couldn't help you noticing me...." Freddie said loud enough, so she could hear him over the usual strip club music.

The stripper stopped what she was doing, and smiled at Freddie. "Well, how could I not?" She replied, the Hispanic accent kicking in. "I mean, you're FREDDIE HEDIGER!"

"Who cares about my name?" Freddie said. "I want to know, what is YOUR name?"

"The boss calls me "Border Hopper"." The girl answered.

Freddie frowned. Of course, she gave him her stripper name....That wasn't good enough. Plus, that's just a mean alias. "Don't give me that, sweetheart...I want your REAL name." He was determined to get to know this girl.

"My name is Marisol." The girl replied.

"Marisol...." Freddie thought. "So....Exotic."

"That is a very pretty name." Freddie complimented, Marisol blushed in response.

"Thank you! It's an honor to bring you pleasure, Freddie Hediger!" Marisol replied, obviously enthusiastic.

"Sweetheart, please." Freddie continued. "You haven't brought ANY pleasure to me yet. I will get pleasure, when I get to know you better." You sly dog, you....

Marisol gasped in surprise. Someone famous wanted to...Get to know her?! This sure would give her reputation a boost! "I want to get to know you, too! But...I can't just up and leave work...."

"You sure you want to work for someone that calls your "Border Hopper?" Freddie asked, chuckling.

Marisol frowned. "I don't like being a stripper, honest....But it's easy money."

Freddie nodded, understanding. Most strippers her met...Were just whores, they did this for fun, he rarely ever met a stripper, that did this for income, but everytime he did, it made Freddie depressed, it really goes to show, people will do ANYTHING for money.

"I'm going to be straight up honest with you, Marisol..." Freddie began. "I think, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life...." Marisol gasped, and her face turned a violent shade of red. "I turned 21 years old today, I had my first drink of Alcohol, but I want to set ONE more milestone..."

"What's that?" Marisol asked curiously.

Freddie smiled ever so genuinely. "I want to have my first REAL relationship, with a REAL girl. And I want that...To be you."

Marisol's heart skipped a beat, she could barely breath after a few seconds, Freddie had to calm her down. "I....I.....I can't believe this...."

"I want to take you away, away from all of this...." Freddie said, gesturing at the surroundings. "I know, it's odd, but I did NOT come here for a simple booty call...I came here, for LOVE....."

"But....But why me?" Marisol asked, on the verge of happy tears.

"Because, when I look at you...I look at a girl, who is here for all the wrong reasons....You shouldn't be here, Marisol...." Freddie explained. "You should NOT have to do this for Money....."

"You're right, Freddie..." Marisol agreed. "I just....Don't know what else to do...."

"If you want, we can get to know eachother a bit more." Freddie suggested. "I can take you away from all of this, and, if I have made a difference in your judgement....You can quit all of this shit....And you can become a wholesome female."

Marisol smiled sweetly. "I'd....Like that very much..."

Freddie smiled in return. "Just so you know, I'm NOT having sex with you tonight....This will be my first real, official Relationship....I just want to get to know you first."

Marisol nodded in agreement. "You can stay at my Hotel with me for the night. In the morning, I will buy you some clothes....Clothes that, don't look like this..."

"Deal!" Marisol said, hugging Freddie. She felt so warm, it captivated Freddie. He REALLY hoped this worked out, he didn't want to screw this up. He REALLY didn't.

That night, Freddie did in fact find his future wife. After less than a year of knowing eachother, Marisol and Freddie tied the knot, and they had three children together, Damian, Kit and Tate.

Freddie convinced Marisol to quit the stripping business forever, as a replacement job, Marisol became a Real Estate distributor, a job that paid TONS more money than her previous job…

Freddie figured he was set for life now. He finally had received the girl of his dreams, but his marriage didn’t even last 10 years. On June 12th, 2012, just 5 months until the 10th anniversary of the happy couple’s first encounter, Freddie caught his wife cheating on him with one of his best Friends, Zach Gowen. That same day, Freddie filed for divorce, and Marisol agreed to file, as well.

The moral of the story is….Don’t look for true love…In a fucking strip-club.

Freddie chuckled at the good old days, but he wondered why he had experienced his second flashback in 24 hours...Hmm, it was probably nothing.

"About time you woke up, you pathetic piece of Trash...." Said CM PUNK, who had just shown up at the scene of the chaos with Austin and Marcus, as well.

"Screw you, man." Freddie retorted, finally standing up on all fours, now. "I made a mistake, I'll admit it, but I don't need you to remind me."

Punk chuckled. "That's my job." Freddie scowled.

"We were just amazed how you got EVERYONE in town drunk except for me, Punk, Marcus, and all of the children." Austin said, shaking his head at such tomfoolery.

"Yeah!" Punk protested. "And just what the HELL were you thinking?! There were CHILDREN at that party!"

"Like I said, I made a mistake..." Freddie replied.

"There was a very high chance that your kids would've gotten AIDS last night..." Marcus said with a chuckle. "Actually, that would be pretty cool."

"You WOULD think that." Punk said, glaring at Marcus. "You're just as cynical as The Built in Karaoke Machine over here!" Marcus and Austin laughed as they remembered how funny it was watching Freddie sing "What is Love" by Haddaway.

Freddie laughed. "Holy shit, did I sing karaoke?!"

Marcus nodded. "Yeah, bitch, you were kickin' it old School, that's for sure...."

"Sweet..." Freddie said, grinning from ear to ear.

Few Moments Later.....

Luckily, the conversation those four had didn't awake anyone, so Marcus, Punk, Freddie and Austin took it upon themselves to wake up everyone else who was passed out. When they asked them, "Why don't I remember a lot from last Night?" Punk simply responded, "You just drank some stupid juice." After a while, mostly everyone went to their own homes and lives, but the Mane 6 and the other Humans stayed to chat.

Twilight was glaring angrily at Freddie. "How-how could you do that, Freddie?!"

Freddie gulped. Oh shit. "I'm sorry, evero-errr, Everypony! It's just....Parties are LAME without alcohol! Yeh, I said it!"

Punk facehoofed. "You are a vile, vile man, Hediger....You can have fun without stooping so low!" Most of the Humans and Ponies nodded in agreement.

"Ah'm disappointed in ya, Freddeh..." Applejack stated. "My sis coulda drank some'a that!"

"Hey, atleast Freddie didn't have sex with Someone in front of your sister..." Marcus said, snickering.

"What in the hay are ya talkin' about?" Applejack asked, raising her voice.

"Well, Applejack, ya seeee..." Austin began. "You, kind of...Had...Sex....With Big Mac...." Everypony's eyes widened in shock.

".....Do what now?" Applejack slowly said.

"Yup," Punk continued. "And Apple Bloom saw it. You two are HORRIBLE role models!"

"Eerrrrrr...." Was all Applejack could say.

"How are we gonna explain that ta her, sis?" Big Mac asked out loud.

"Well, umm...Think'a something!" Applejack blurted out as her mind went to work.

"What else happened?" Rainbow Dash asked, mentally giggling at all of the awesome things she missed.

"Well..." Austin began. "You kept ramming yourself into the ground, Dash."

"Sweet!" Rainbow Dash proclaimed, highoofing with Nova.

"Way to go, dumbass..." Nova snickered.

"You kept screaming, basically, Nova." Punk said.

"That's fucking BORING!" Nova shouted.

"Yeah, like that..." Punk stated, rolling his eyes.

"You gave alcohol to your birds, Fluttershy..." Austin said, Fluttershy squeaked in horror.

"Oh....oh my! I hope they're alright!"

"Nope...They're dead." Marcus joked. He noticed Fluttershy start to cry. "Sorry, I was just kidding. They're alive and well." This seemed to make Fluttershy calm down.

"Ryback twirled around like a girly Ballerina." Punk said, laughing. Ryback just blushed immensely, and then shrugged.

"Pinkie, you uh....Spun around like a top." Marcus said.

"Yay! I had the most fun!" Pinkie exclaimed, hopping around.

"Uuuuhhh...Yeah..." Marcus said, he still had to tell her EVERYTHING she did. "Than you....Uhh...Tried to...Have sex with me..." Pinkie immediately stopped bouncing.

"Oh.....Well....Ummm..." Pinkie giggled nervously. "Sorry? Yeah! Sorry, Marky!"

"She was just getting you back for almost doing it with her!" Punk said as he recalled the events of the meeting. Marcus growled.

"Shut the FUCK up about that!" Marcus retorted, growing angrier by the minute.

"What about US?" Rarity asked worriedly. "More importantly, ME!" She hoped she didn't do anything TOO un-lady-like.

"Well...Twilight you...Licked my ear." Austin said, chuckling nervously. Twilight blushed.

"I....I did?"

"Yup." Spike said, snickering. "You went to town on his Lobe!"

"SPIKE!" Twilight yelled, the little Dragon just whistled innocently. "I'm...Sorry, Austin...."

"Don't worry!" Marcus said cheerfully. "Other ponies have gone further with him than you did!" Austin punched Sims in the gut, causing him to groan.

"That's not true..." Austin said, scowling.

"That punch says otherwise..." Marcus coughed.

"I will NEVER drink alcohol AGAIN!" Twilight proclaimed. "My friends earlobes will now, and forever will be.....Saliva-less. Well, atleast MY saliva, that is."

"Twilight, dear...I think you are overreacting." Rarity said, laughing. "We cannot control what we do when our mind is elsewhere, and we should NOT blame Freddie for whatever occurred last night."

"You grinded your vagina against my legs last night..." Punk dropped the bombshell, smirking.

Rarity's expression then changed....10 fold. "I'm going to DESTROY YOU!!!!!!!!" She yelled, lunging at a cowering Freddie. But Twilight's magic caught Rarity in mid-air.

"What was that you said about not blaming Freddie?" Rainbow Dash snickered.

"THIS DOES NOT INVOLVE YOU!" Rarity snapped back. "All YOU did was smash your head into the ground, I defiled Phillip's legs! How DISGUSTING! REVOLTING! MORTIFYING!"

"Ya know, Rarity..." Punk continued. "I'm not mad...What you did last night, made me change my opinion about you."

Rarity suddenly smiled. "It did?"

"Oh yeah." Punk said, nodding. "I learned...That you really ARE generous, my legs appreciate you sharing your moist pussy with them..." He then glared at Rarity seriously.

Rarity immediately shouted once again. "Freddie...Your destruction will have to wait....BECAUSE PHILLIP MUST DIE FIRST!!!!!"

"Would you all PLEASE shut your traps?" Trixie said, appearing out of her shed. "The ANNOYED and EXHAUSTED Trixie does not take kindly to being awoken when she does not plan on being awoken!"

"We're sorry, Trixie." Twilight apologized. "There's just been...A little backlash referring to last night."

Trixie chuckled. "Ah, yes....Trixie and Ze heard you all and your ignorant happenings. Trixie only wishes she could have been there in person to see the HILARIOUS and LAUGHABLE hi-jinks you all were up to."

"It was VERY funny...." Marcus said, reminiscing.

"Trixie is sure it was an absolute RIOT!" Trixie replied, grinning.

"How about we all just calm down about last Night?" Freddie intervened. "I did something stupid, I made a mistake, I admit it. And I apologize to all that were affected. From now on, at your Parties Pinkie Pie, I will only bring alcohol, that you can TELL is alcohol, and I will NOT trick everyone into drinking it." The ponies all smiled at Freddie for his ability to know when he's fucked up, but Nova was pretty skeptical.

Nova coughed. "Bullshit." And then coughed again.

"I'm serious. I promise." Freddie said, smiling.

"PIIINNKKIIEEE PROOMMIISSEEEE?" Pinkie said, leaning right into Freddie's face, and raising an eyebrow.

"The what now?" Freddie asked confusingly, obviously still on Season 1 Episode 2 of Friendship is Magic.

All of the ponies, and Marcus sighed, and repeated the chant simultaneously. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye...."

"How did you know that Marcus?" Freddie asked, snickering.

Marcus scowled. "I live with her, you moron....I know all about her little antics...."

Freddie chuckled. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

Marcus crossed his arms. "Good. But whatever you do, don't break the fucking promise.....Her mane will become fire, and she will yell at you in a very demonic voice if you do." Freddie just stared at Marcus. "Shit happens." Marcus shrugged.

Pinkie giggled. "It's all truly ruly!"

"Okay. We forgive you, Freddie." Twilight said, smiling.

"Hey, Trixie....Where's Ze?" Nova asked, looking around for one of his best friends. Just then, Ze wobbled out of Trixie's shed. His legs and hooves were handcuffed, and he had whipped cream all over his body, and several whip marks.

"Holy crap, Ze." Austin chuckled. "What happened to you?"

"Ze does not wish to talk about it...." Ze replied, staring at the ground. "For Ze lost all dignity last night."

"Awww..." Trixie cooed. "Do not fear, slave! For, as Trixie's number one fan, it only gets better than that!" Trixie than grabbed Ze, and kissed him passionately. All of the ponies jaws dropped in disgust and shock.

"What?" Trixie said, smirking. "The GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie acquired a WHOREISH and MASOCHISTIC...Sex-slave." Ze stared at Ze seductively, and Ze only gulped back.

Ze nodded sadly. "Yes, it's all true....."

"Do not be sad, slave!" Trixie said, slapping Ze. "Sadness equals WIMP, and Trixie's number 1 fan, and sex slave, will NOT be a WIMP!"

"Yes, mistress...." Ze said, sighing.

"WOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Nova screamed. "GO ZEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!"

"Ummmmm....How....Was it?" Twilight asked, which she probably shouldn't have.

"Let Ze just say....." Ze began. "Ponies.....Know stuff.....More stuff than humans....."

Austin's left eye began twitching. "Ze....What the hell, man?"

"Trixie is.....Astonishing." Ze said, smiling. "Ze has never felt this good....."

"But, sugacube....Looks like ya've been whipped." Applejack said, studying Ze's marks.

"Oh, Applejack!" Trixie laughed. "These whip-marks, are nothing but badges of Honor! Ze should be proud! Noone has been able to bring it to Trixie's pussy like Ze did!" Everypony stared in shock at this new development.

Nova applauded, gaining stares from everyone. "What?! Is it so wrong to be proud for my friend, dammit!"

"It actually is." Punk said. "Especially when your HUMAN friend...Fucked a PONY! Man, talk about ripping away someone's pride..."

Ze puffed his chest confidently. "Ze may have had his pride stripped away from him.....But think about it like THIS.....Ze has gotten laid more times in the past week, than any of you!" Ze laughed, while the humans stared in shock.

"He....Actually has a point..." Marcus said, shaking his head in pain.

"We...Are so...PATHETIC." Freddie said, hanging his head.

"YES! Good job, Ze!" Trixie said, giving him a peck on the cheek. "When somepony makes fun of you, you CRUSH your spirits! The GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie, has taught you WELL!"

Just then, John Lauranaitis, and his band of cronies were back. They figured that Town Hall would be cleaned up by now, and that all of the animals they saw the previous night were up in about, and they were right....Although, as soon as Damien Sandow and Brock Lesnar saw who EXACTLY they were looking at, they nearly fainted.

"Hello, ummm...Ponies?!" John gasped, his jaw dropping in shock.

"LAURANAITIS?!" All of the Humans said in shock and disgust.

"Men....Is that....IS THAT YOU?!" John asked, not believing what he was seeing.

"Hurr durr. D'AAAWWWWWW....." Jeff Ross cooed. "Look at all dese cute little Ponehs! HURR."

"And just who are YOU bozos?" Rainbow Dash demanded, flying around the humans.

"Introductions are not needed..." Daniel Bryan said, pushing Dash away. "All we want, is the W...W..E...Championship....Give it back, Punk!"

Punk just chuckled. "Well, well, well...If it isn't Goatface himself! Sorry, but the WWE Title belongs in the hands of the much more Deserving pony, and not some scuzzy, flea-carrying GOAT!"

Bryan was about to snap. "THE ONLY THING GOAT ABOUT ME, IS THAT I AM THE GREATEST. OF ALL. TIME! DO YOU HEAR ME?!"

Marcus snickered. "Screw off, Bryan. You're just jealous that even I'VE got a title, and you don't!"

"Do NOT go there, Sims..." Bryan said, pointing at Marcus. "I don't wanna have to make any of you tap Out....All I want...Is my title, then, we will be on our way!"

"ENOUGH!" Twilight yelled, causing all of the yelling and threats to cease. "I am sorry to raise my voice, but this is far too confusing.....We all want answers..." Suddenly, Twilight stared hatefully at John and his cronies.

"And we want them.....NOW."

------TO BE CONTINUED------

OH MAH SHIT'S HIT DA FAN!

Invaders MUST Die!

"Well, ummm...." John Lauranaitis stumbled over his words, still not believing the species of animal he was talking too. Twilight raised an impatient eyebrow at the GM of both RAW and Smackdown, as sweat rolled down his forehead, John clenched his teeth in frustration.

"Go ahead, Johnny Ace...." Freddie said, grinning. "Tell us why the hell your rotten ass is here?"

John tugged at his suit, and let out a huge sigh, he then explained the situation, in his extremely funny voice. "My name.....Is Mr. John Lauranaitis....I am the Executive Vice President, of Talent Relations, and the PERMANENT, General Manager...Of both RAW and Smackdown." He now had his confidence back, as he grinned smugly.

The ponies just stared blankly at Lauranaitis, not having a clue what he was talking about. "Talent Relations?" Twilight repeated.

"General Manager?" Fluttershy repeated quietly.

"RAW?" Rarity repeated.

"Smackdown?" Rainbow Dash repeated angrily.

"PERMANENT General Manager?!?!" Freddie yelled inside his head.

".........CHOCOLATE COVERED ANTS?!" Pinkie Pie shouted, shoving a handful of chocolate covered ants in her mouth. "MMMMM....YUM!"

"What in the HAY are ya talkin' about, mister?" Applejack said, stepping up to Lauranaitis.

"Wow....Dumb ponies...." Christian mumbled, causing Sandow and Lesnar to glare at him.

"Who you calling DUMB?" Rainbow Dash growled, getting up in Christian's face.

"YOU IDIOT!" Lesnar yelled at Christian.

"Whoa there, pardner...Easy does it." Applejack said warily, pulling Rainbow Dash back down to the ground. "Let's not get too hasteh just yet."

"Yes..." Twilight said, gawking at the new arrivals. "We are terribly sorry, it's just that...Well, you all look like...."

"HUMANS?" Chase Hediger answered with ease.

"Well....Yes..." Twilight said, chuckling. "We just want to know why you are here."

"If...That's alright with you...." Fluttershy whimpered.

Damien Sandow smiled. "That will not be a problem. Since I am the only NON-ignoramus in this bunch....I am assigning..." He chuckled. "MYSELF, to give you all a definitive explanation as to why we are here." All the other humans glared at Damien for his arrogance.

"First off...." Sandow began. "Since I have MANNERS, unlike the common degenerates of Society....My name, is Damien Sandow." He bowed. "I am the Intellectual savior, of the unwashed masses....And the official Martyr, of the World Wrestling Entertainment."

"World Rasslin' Entertainment?" Applejack repeated.

"That would be correct." Sandow said, grinning.

"Isn't that where you work, dears?" Rarity asked the humans.

"That's the place." Austin replied.

Sandow cleared his throat. "I would appreciate if you would not interrupt me, Ross...." Austin just rolled his eyes. "Continuing on....Yes, we are wrestlers, we are.... Colleagues, you might say.....Of the men-excuse me....Ponies standing by you."

"THAT'S US." Nova said, his chin high up in the air.

"No shit..." Marcus growled.

Sandow cringed. "Please.....Refrain from the harsh language, Marcus...." Marcus just smirked.

"Finally...." Twilight thought. "Someone besides me who does not enjoy the humans salty language."

Sandow continued. "A few days ago, we were informed, that these men were reported among the Missing. Mr. Lauranaitis here rounded up yours truly, and the rest of these......Pawns...." The humans glared at Sandow once again. "To find them. We discovered some sort of device in Pyro-Zi's locker room, and an identical type of device in the shared locker room."

"The Dimensionomicon!" All of the ponies and humans exclaimed.

"Hmmm....Yes." Sandow continued once again, becoming frustrated with being interrupted. "We couldn't find any blueprints with the device in the shared locker room, but we did find blueprints of the device in Pyro-Zi's locker room, and we used that device to travel here."

"To rescue Ze and friends?" Ze asked hopefully.

The other humans just laughed, except for Jeff, who just hyuked. ".....No." Lauranaitis said plainly, causing growls from the humans.

"You WILL take us back home, Johnny..." Freddie threatened. "Or I'll fire ALL your asses!"

Lauranaitis chuckled. "You cannot do that, Freddie."

"What?!" Freddie exclaimed. "The hell not?!"

"I was able to have a no-fire clause put in my Contract." John explained. "Only the board of Directors can fire me, and if you choose to fire any of my faithful Superstars....I can just hire them right back."

"Dammit..." Freddie mumbled.

"That doesn't even matter, Clownshoes." Punk replied, causing John to scowl. "We aren't going home until Pyro-Zi is no longer a threat here!"

"Good." Bryan said, smirking. "Maybe he'll kill you all, and once you die, the GREATEST. OF ALL. TIME, can once again become W....W....E...ChampioN! YES! YES! YES!!!!!!!!!"

"Calm your vagina." Punk said angrily. "This is MY title now, and nothing is going to take it away."

"GIVE IT BACK!" Bryan whined.

"HELL NO!" Punk snapped back.

"What exactly is the problem here?" Twilight asked curiously.

"Phillip Brooks, the golden boy behind the WWE: WORST. WRESTLER. EVER, stole the WWE Championship from me, Daniel Bryan, the GREATEST. OF ALL. TIME! I am here to collect it, and NOTHING else! SO GIVE IT BACK, YOU PUNK!"

Punk just blew a raspberry. "Nope."

"GIVE. IT. BAAAAACCCKKK!!!!!!!" Bryan yelled.

"NO. FUCKING. WAY!" Punk screamed.

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"I said YES, dammit!" Punk yelled.

"I said NO!!!!! AND THAT'S FINAAAAAAAALLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!" Bryan yelled at the top of his Lungs.

Punk just shrugged. "Alright, then."

Bryan smiled triumphantly. "That's right..." His eyes then bulged. "Wait.....NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Bryan was starting to hurt not only the ponies ears, but also all of the humans, so Lesnar FINALLY punched him in the face.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, HALF-PINT!!!!!!" Lesnar screamed ferociously. Bryan clenched his jaw, and just stood up and said nothing.

"So, what's your MASTER plan, Lauranaitis?" Freddie asked, doubting Johnny was smart enough to blow him away.

John smirked. "It's quite simple, really." He began. "You know just as well as I do, you are the Chairman of the WWE. And the Chairman must be at work EVERY SINGLE DAY, and if they miss a month of work, they are stripped of their Chairman duties."

"Oh shit...." Freddie gasped, realizing he was fucked.

"The clock is ticking, Freddie...." John stated, laughing as Freddie snarled.

"Ya know what..." Freddie said, looking down at the ground, and then looking up with a fire in his eyes. "Fuck it. I guess I wont be Chairman anymore.....We are going to save these ponies, you asshole.....And if losing my job means I can protect innocent animals, then so be it. Have fun, you son of a bitch...Because being Chairman fucking sucks."

John chuckled. "I can handle it. After all, I have experience....Unlike you....."

Marcus suddenly realized something. "Yo, you son of a bitches better not even THINK about stripping me of my Title...." Marcus said with passion.

"Oh, I intend to." John said, smirking. Marcus felt the need to lunge at him, and knock his head off. "Well, that is unless you can somehow get back home within 30 days, which I don't think you'll be able to." John laughed.

Marcus suddenly smirked. "Whatever, I can win the world title, the U.S. Title is useless to me.....Have at it."

"We will do just that..." John said, looking over at Sandow. "Damien, congratulations....If Marcus does not make it back to earth within 30 days...You are the NEW, United States Champion!"

Damien laughed with delight. "A fine choice, my good sir. I will bring PRESTIGE back to the United States Championship, it was being tarnished by the likes of this.....Urban jugaloo.

Marcus raised an eyebrow. "Is that an insult? Cuz I have NO IDEA what the hell you're even saying....."

Damien laughed. "Not a surprise."

Punk then looked at his OWN title, which he had not let out of his sight since he arrived in Equestria. "What about my Title, smokey?"

"Unfortunately..." Lauranaitis began. "We cannot strip you of the title, Punk....Unless we can get it back to Earth somehow."

"NO!" Bryan began to scream, but when Lesnar raised his fist, he stopped once again.

"Go ahead..." Punk said, laying the WWE Title on the ground. "It's all yours....." Just then, Punk's friends all stood in front of him and the title, making a wall.

"You'll have to get through all of us FIRST, though..." Austin said, narrowing his eyes at his human counterparts. Ryback growled like a menacing pitbull.

"Perhaps some other time...." Sandow suggested, rubbing his beard.

"PUSSIES! FIGHT US!'' Nova screamed, ready for action.

"Let's go, boys...." John said, gesturing towards the Dimensionomicon on the ground.

"Hold on just ONE second..." Twilight said, halting the humans. "At least tell us your names."

"We may as well humor them..." Chase said, John nodded.

"I'M BROCK LESNAR....." Lesnar said, engaging in an epic "Pec Pop of Love." The Rock began rolling in his imaginary grave.

"I'm Damien Sandow, as said before." Damien once again bowed towards the ponies.

"I'm Christian." Christian said, smirking. "The World Heavyweight Champion...."

"No one cares." Punk said, snickering. Christian just glared at him.

"Durr hurr....I'm Jeff Ross!" Jeff said, doing the Engineer dance. "Anyone seen mah uncle AUSTEN?"

"I'm right here, Jeff!" Jeff said, throwing his hoof in the air.

"HI, UNCLE AUSTEEEENNNN!!! Hurr." Jeff said excitedly. Chase facepalmed in response....He would NEVER get it....

"I'm Chase Hediger." Chase said, scowling. "The nephew of....FREDDIE HEDIGER...." He cringed at his uncle's name.

"Wow..." Twilight thought. "We finally get to meet the so-called "Evil" nephews. They don't look like much...."

"I'm Daniel Bryan." Bryan said, striking a cocky pose.

"I like your shirt, Danny!" Pinkie exclaimed, pointing at Daniel's shirt. It read: "YES! YES! YES!"

"YEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!!!!" Bryan screamed one more time, before running around in circles.

"And of course, I'm John Lauranaitis...." John said.

"Well, we are-" Twilight began.

"We know!" Damien and Lesnar interrupted Twilight.

"What the?" Ze said, confused.

Punk snickered. "Dudes...I think Roid-bag and Caveman are BRONIES!"

Sandow's eyes bulged. "NO! NO! YOU'VE GOT IT ALL WRONG!"

Lesnar however, grinned. "FUCK YEAH WE ARE!!!!"

"YOU MORONIC MANTAUR!" Sandow screamed. "THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET!"

"There's nothing to be ashamed of, ass-fuck!" Lesnar screamed back, causing Damien to throw his face into his hands.

"Hell yeah!" Freddie replied. "Brohoof!"

"AWW YEAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Lesnar yelled with delight, bro-hoofing Freddie.

Sandow looked up from his hands, and stared at Freddie's hoof. He lightly bro-hoofed it, frowning.

"I can't believe we've met MORE of our fans!" Rarity squealed, fainting on the grass.

"Finally..." Punk though, smirking. "Now she gets a taste of how NORMAL it feels to lie down on the grass."

"Really, Sandow? Lesnar? You guys are wussies..." Christian said, laughing along with all the other humans.

"You close your cavitas oralis!" Damien exclaimed. "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is a prime sample of what society SHOULD be like!"

"YEAH. GO EAT HAM." Lesnar yelled at Christian.

"Well...For those of you who would like to know..." Twilight began. "I'm Twilight Sparkle."

"I'm Rainbow Dash!" Dash said, flying around. "And if any of you wanna hurt MY friends, I'll HURT you!" Chase snickered.

"SHUT UP..." Lesnar warned. "SHE WILL."

"I'm Rarity." Rarity said, flipping her mane.

"I'm Pinkie Pie!" Pinkie exclaimed, hopping around the new friends. "Hi, guys!" She then hugged Jeff.

"D'AAAWWWWWWWW...." Jeff cooed. "Shen dun soft!"

"My name is...Fluttershy...." Fluttershy said quietly.

"And ah'm Applejack." Applejack said, smiling. "Howdy!"

Jeff was staring at Applejack, and while he was....He got a very weird feeling...Something he had never felt before.....Jeff didn't know what it was, all he knew was, Applejack reminded him of the female and pony version of himself.

"Hurr hurr....That names PUUURRTTTYYY...." Jeff said, still staring a Applejack.

"Watch it, COW-BOY...." Big Mac growled, but it didn't stop Jeff from staring.

"It's good to meet you all." John said, smiling. "We just want to know...We have nothing against you ponies, it's THOSE we don't like!" He pointed at the humans, who were whistling innocently.

"Eh...You're just a senile asshole." Marcus said, snickering.

"Grrrr..." John growled. "We will be back later.....Sorry for interrupting your peace, ponies. Let's go, boys."

"WAIT! JEFF!'' Austin called out, and Jeff ran over to his Uncle.

"Eeeeyup?" Jeff said, playing with the buttons on his overalls.

"What the?" Big Mac thought. "Darnit....He's stealin' mah lines!"

"I just wanted to say....." Austin began. "I'm sorry....When you stabbed me with that pitch-fork, I just....Something inside of me exploded....I know you didn't do it on purpose, yet my ego got the better of me....I'm sorry I attacked you at Extreme Rules, and I'm sorry I....Nearly killed you at Over The Limit."

Jeff had tears in his eyes, he hugged his uncle without any hesitation. "Ah forgive ya, uncle AUSTEEN...Ah love ya too much ta fight any more...." Austin returned the hug, and smiled warmly.

"Oh, thank you, Jeff! Go home, and tell your mom and my Mom, that everything's okay! Okay?"

Jeff nodded, still smiling. "'Course, Austeen! They'll be pleased ta know we've made up."

"WHAT?!?!?!" Chase yelled. "YOU IDIOT! THAT WASN'T THE PLAN!"

Jeff scowled, walked up to Chase, and punched him square in the nose, causing it to bleed. "Screw ya and ya plan, Chase! AH LOVE MAH UNCLE AUSTEEN! YA SHOULD REALLY LEARN TA APOLOGIZE TA YA OWN FAMILY, TOO!" He gestured towards Freddie.

Chase got up, shocked at Jeff and his actions. He knew Jeff was a bit....Slow....But this surprised him....He just got knocked on his ass! He clenched his bloody nose, and walked over to his own Uncle.

"Freddie....Jeff's right..." Chase began. "I really should learn to apologize....And I will...." He smiled at Freddie, but quickly turned angry once again. "...When you die and go to HELL!" Chase quickly punched Freddie in the jaw, and ran off before neither Freddie or any of his friends could attack Chase in return.

Chase and the other humans quickly ran to the Dimensionomicon. John turned it on, and the portal whirred back on. They all quickly stepped through it, sarcastically waving goodbye to Equestria, except Jeff, who was scowling at Chase.

"WHAT IN THE....." Pyro-Zi though to himself. "How did they?!" Pyro-Zi, as usual, was stalking, but he didn't hear much of the conversation, as he had gotten there too late. "I thought the Dimensionomicon could only Teleport to, not from!" Pyro-Zi then remembered, he had created two Dimensionomicons. One prototype, and a more advanced version. "Oh no...I must have used the Prototype to get here to Equestria! The advanced version CAN teleport to and from Dimensions!" Pyro-Zi quickly flew off in his Rocket Shoes, cursing himself mentally for making a mistake, which he normally didn't do....

"Well...." Twilight said, sighing. "That was odd...."

..........NO SHIT.

-------TO BE CONTINUED------

About the Birds and The Bees

Everyone gasped, and went over to check on Freddie. He didn't look in pain, just in shock. He never expected his nephew to grow some balls and apologize to him for being such a child, but it seemed Chase couldn't even grow any balls in the will to fight. He just sucker-punched him right in the face, and ran off before he could get back at him, that wasn't the Hediger way, not at all.

"Are you okay, dude?" Austin asked with his mouth agape. Freddie said nothing. He just stared in the direction of where the portal was, holding his jaw, this was a recurring motion for many minutes.

"Hellllooooo.....?" Marcus said, waving his hoof in Freddie's face. "Earth to dumbass....." Still, no response, just a cold glare in the same direction he had been looking at for a while.

Nova shook his head, and lowered his head to Freddie's ear, and let out a deafening scream. "WAKE THE FUCK UUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!" That did the trick. Freddie jumped in fear of his life, and almost uses his reflexes and usually jumpy demeanor to smack Nova in the face, but Nova was able to dodge it...Barely.

"Shit, watch it!" Nova exclaimed, glaring angrily at Freddie.

"Oh....Sorry, man..." Freddie replied, still not entirely in the right mindset.

"I'll ask again..." Austin said. "Are you okay?"

"Define "okay"..." Freddie replied, looking at Austin.

"Does your jaw hurty wurty!" Pinkie said, frowning. She really didn't like to see her friends hurt.

"I've been through a lot worse...." Freddie answered, chuckling. This make Pinkie smile more than before. "Girls, we get punched for a living." The humans nodded.

"Yeah." Marcus said, smirking. "That shit don't phase us!"

"Still.....I'm going to help you." Twilight said, her horn beginning to glow.

"Oh no...." Freddie thought. "I knew this would happen....Her "experiments" were bound to occur. But dammit! Why do I have to be first?!" Freddie gulped, but Twilight smiled reassuringly.

"I'm just going to take away all of your pain." Twilight said. She leaned down to Freddie, who was still on the ground, not fully grasping what just happened. She touched her purple horn to Freddie's cheeks, and rubbed it around a bit. Freddie awkwardly stood in place, not wanting to get cut by the horn.

"Wow..." Freddie thought. "This hasn't happened to me since that one groupie back in '99 pulled out a spiked dildo during our own "concert." Man, I sure as HELL don't miss the 90's...."

Still, though, the horn felt, surprisingly, more comfortable than rugged and hard, almost like.....A dick....Freddie cringed at his memories. "Probably should've just looked at that.....Person's pants before diving right in. I hate trannies...."

"There." Twilight said, removing her horn from Freddie's cheek in a matter of seconds. "All better?"

Freddie rubbed his cheek in surprise. No pain. "Magic be praised!" Freddie exclaimed in a God-like voice, causing several of the ponies to giggle.

Nova was giggling for all the wrong reasons, though. "Heh heh....Her head boner touched your cheek...."

"Strange..." Trixie said, smirking at Nova. "That's what Ze calls Trixie's SHINY and TIGHT-FITTING horn, don't you, Ze?" She grinned seductively at Ze, who blushed in embarrassment.

"Uuuuuhhhhhh....." Ze stammered nervously. Trixie was lovely, but did she HAVE to talk about their private "shows" while other ponies were around? Especially NOVA of all people?! "It's.....Very....Hard." He finally said. Punk, Marcus and Nova were laughing on the ground.

Trixie glared at the three. "You three will not think it is so funny when Trixie gives you the same treatment." Punk, Nova and Marcus gulped, and quickly apologized.

"Hey, sorry, dude...." Nova said. "Fetishes aren't funny."

"Yeah.....Ummmm....." Punk stammered. "It's not funny what unicorns choose to do with their horns!" He chuckled nervously.

"I still think it's fucking funny." Marcus said, snickering.

"Apologize to Trixie's slave!" Trixie exclaimed. "NOW." She glared angrily at Marcus.

Marcus just glared back, but with a large smirk plastered on his face. "Fuck no."

Trixie suddenly grinned. "Trixie likes your style. Your attitude is quite admiring. You are not afraid to speak your mind..." Trixie shook her head. "Trixie only wishes MORE ponies were like you..." She looked at Ze.

"...What?" Ze said, utterly confused.

"Ze, you are Trixie's slave and all..." Trixie began. "But, the bottom line is....You have no testicular fortitude. I can tell, that Trixie is going to have to wear the cape in this relationship."

"Is that...." Ze gulped. "A bad thing?"

Trixie laughed. "Of course not, my slave. It just means that Trixie will be bossing you around a lot....Like she did last night..." She moved her eyebrows up and down in a sexual manner.

"Oh....Uh...Yes." Ze stammered once again. "You are very....In control...."

Trixie nodded. "Yes, Trixie is used to being a leader. It comes...." She then struck a pose. "NATURALLY."

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "There she goes with that arrogance again...." She muttered under her voice. Trixie did not hear it, luckily.

"We are quite sorry, Trixie." Austin began. "We did not have a chance to introduce ourselves to you last night."

Trixie waved a hoof in dismissal. "Not a problem. Luckily, just like Trixie....Ze enjoys having conversations during...."Shows." He told me about you all, and your current situation. Trixie heard about humans being right here in Ponyville while she was on tour, so I just had to return to see for myself."

"Give it a rest, Trixie." Rainbow Dash said, laughing. "You only came back because your little tour was an epic FAIL!"

Trixie glared. "Trixie has never been, nor never will be...A "fail." Trixie, is a bonafide SUCCESS!" She threw her arms up in the air and smiled widely.

"Ursa Minor ring any bells?" Twilight said, grinning.

Trixie sighed. "That was just a minor setback for Trixie....Not a "fail.""

"Sugacube....Ya want ta be our friends, don't ya?" Applejack asked.

"Yes." Trixie said. "Trixie made some....Mistakes when she first arrived in Ponyville, and she would like to correct them."

"If ya wanna be our friends....First, ya have ta learn ta tell the truth." Applejack said, smiling.

Trixie frowned. "Fine....If it means that the bridges I burnt will be restored, Trixie will do it. Trixie really came back, because yes....Trixie's entire tour...Was indeed, a fail..."

"We're deeply sorry, Trixie..." Fluttershy said sincerely.

"Not a problem." Trixie replied, still frowning. "Trixie came back to Ponyville, because her tour has been.....Put on hold for the moment. Every show she had, the audience BOOED Trixie! It made her....So frustrated! Trixie had many more shows left in the tour, but she cancelled them!" She began laughing. "That'll teach those UNGRATEFUL and UNNERVING ponies to boo the GREAT and POWERFUL Trrriixie!"

"Pardon us for asking, Trixie....But...What exactly is your occupation?" Austin asked curiously. Trixie didn't have on her signature cape and magician hat, so there was no way of knowing.

Trixie grinned. "Trixie is glad you asked. Trixie is a Magician!"

Punk laughed. "How corny...."

Trixie shook her head. "Oh no, no, no, no, no....Ze informed Trixie that there is no actual Magic back on Earth, which makes all of the Magicians, nothing but complete hoaxes, but the Magicians here in Equestria are legit!"

"Trixie isn't exactly the most....Awe-inspiring magician, though." Twilight said.

Trixie scowled. "Trixie is learning! And while Trixie may be, inexperienced for the most part, her Pyrotechnics that begin her shows are DAZZLING, and STUPENDOUS!" She boasted.

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Do not forget....Showy and Underwhelming, dear."

Punk chuckled. "LIKE YOU!" He exclaimed, causing Rarity to glare at him. Punk just shrugged.

Trixie chuckled. "Trixie must admit, her fireworks are not WONDERFUL and MAGNIFICENT, but they ARE DAZZLING and STUPENDOUS!"

"The hell is the difference....?" Marcus asked, confused.

Trixie grinned. "WONDERFUL and MAGNIFICENT are considered to be better words to be proud of." Marcus facehoofed.

"Maybe you can show them one of your shows some day, Trixie." Ze suggested.

Trixie cringed. "What type of "show" are you talking about, pray tell?"

Ze facehoofed. "Trixie....."

Trixie shrugged. "How is Trixie supposed to know?" She suddenly grinned. "But, if your friends have a desire for a mare, Trixie can hook them up, she knows ponies. But boys, Trixie is sorry to say, her services only belong to Ze at the moment."

All of the Mane 6 gagged, while many of the humans stared at Trixie unpleasantly. "That's ummmm.....Okay..." Austin said, wanting to slowly back away from this unicorn for some reason.

Trixie shrugged. "Alright, but if any of you ever change your mind.....Talk to Trixie. Like Trixie said, she knows ponies."

Nova laughed. "Holy shit....You've got a PIMP for a girl, Ze! High five!"

Ze buried his face in his hoofs in embarrassment. "Leave Ze alone....."

Trixie giggled. "While he may not show it, Ze is GRATEFUL and HONORED to be Trixie's number one fan. Trixie ASSURES this!"

"Uh....Yeah...." Punk said. "Anyway, Applejack, Dash, we've got a surprise for you two."

Rainbow Dash and Applejack's eyes widened, Dash's from excitement, Applejack's from fear. She liked the humans and all, but they were nutty as all hell.

"Awww YEAH! I sure do love surprises!" Dash said, grinning from ear to ear.

"Uuuuuuhhhhh....I don't know, ya'll." Applejack said tensely. "Ah ain't got a problem with ya'll, it's just....Ya'll are relleh odd, and ah just...."

Marcus smirked. "Trust us, if we wanted to kill you two....Or any of your for that matter, we'd do it." THAT didn't make Applejack feel any better...

"You girls will like this surprise." Freddie said. "We promise."

"Well....Alright." Applejack gave in. "Ah suppose ah can trust ya."

"Great!" Austin exclaimed. "Well, we'll see you guys later." He waved to all of the ponies and Nova and Ze, who weren't going for obvious reasons. The ponies and Ze and Nova waved back.

"Goodbye, Marcus Sims..." Trixie said, winking at Marcus. Marcus cringed, and within seconds, was at the back of the pack, to being the line leader. Anything to get away from Trixie as quick as possible.

Freddie barely remembered something. "Hold on! Ummm...I know this is short notice and all....But, can one of you watch my kids for me?" He asked, grinning nervously.

Pinkie Pie immediately sprang up and down. "IcanIcanIcanIcanIcan! I CAN!"

Freddie laughed. "Okay, Pinkie. You've got the job. I'll pay you 20 bits. We wont be gone TOO long, but we wont be back lickity split."

Pinkie smiled. "No problem! I love kiddies, and they love me! I could watch them ALL DAAAAAYYYYY!"

Freddie smiled. "That's the spirit! Well, bye everyone." He waved to them, and they waved back, and then they began walking to their destination. The humans knew where they were going, but Rainbow Dash and Applejack had no idea. All the humans knew though, was that they would enjoy it thoroughly.

"Sooooo...." Nova began. "I guess it's just me, Ze, and your ladies." He grinned at the Mane 6, well, Mane 4 for right now, and Trixie.

The girls just smiled nervously at Nova.

"What should we do?" Nova said, rubbing a hoof against his chin.

"Well, I don't know about you guys..." Twilight spoke up. "But...I've got.....BOOKS TO READ! Yeah, that's it!" She chuckled nervously. "BYE!" She then trotted off to her home at top speed.

Nova rose an eyebrow at this, but shrugged it off. "I understand. When a nerds gotta read, a nerds gotta read. There are still plenty of us left to have a GRAND old time!"

Rarity suddenly blurted out. "I'd LOVE to, dear...But...I um...." She wanted to say "Make dresses" but that would be a dead giveaway of a lie. She had to say something REAL convincing... "I HAVE TO GO PUNCH SWEETIE BELLE REPEATEDLY UNTIL SHE DIES FROM BLOOD LOSS!" She smiled nervously, hoping Nova would by homicide. "Yes! That's the one!" She muttered under her breath, but loud enough that everyone could hear it.

"No problem." Nova said, smiling. "I kill people in my spare time, too."

Rarity's eye bulged. She felt like asking Nova if he was serious, but FUCK THAT, she had to get the HELL outta dodge! "Yes! It's quite fun...Erm....Goodbye!" She then trotted off, but not at top speed, as that would create a dust-pile in her mane. Yes, even Rarity has to think about her mane while in a rape situation.

Nova could already see the pattern. These ponies would all create lies to avoid him. Since he was, ya know....A friggen oddball. But he would still be nice about it.

"I....Ummm...Have to go....Be...Shy....Some....Where...." Fluttershy squeaked. She then flew off at 1 Mile per Hour.

"These excuses are piss poor..." Nova thought, beginning to scowl.

Trixie coughed. "Trixie and Ze need to...." She turned to Ze desperately for help.

"HAVE SEX!" Ze blurted out loudly.

"Yes!" Trixie exclaimed happily. "Trixie is going to shove her DELIGHTFUL and ROUGH horn up Ze's COZY and PIMPLY ass!" She then slapped Ze on his rump. "Let us go....SLAVE." She smirked seductively.

Ze nodded quickly. Anything to get away from his crazed friend. Ze and Trixie quickly ran to Trixie's "Funhouse." (It's much more fun than that gory fanfiction..)

"That isn't even an excuse!" Nova thought. "They'll be doing that daily!" He then looked at Pinkie Pie, who was surprisingly, STILL there....

Pinkie Pie actually seemed, happy still. She looked like she was all game to hanging out with Nova. "Oh yeah! I'd LOVE to hang out with you, Nova!" She then giggled. "You're so funny!"

Nova's eyes widened. ".....................WUT." Was all he could say.

Pinkie nodded. "Oh yeah! You're a barrel of chimmychangas! We can make CUPCAKES!" She giggled once again.

Nova chuckled nervously. "Gee, Pinkie.....That sounds like fun and all....But...." Nova didn't even give an excuse, he just walked off slowly, staring at Pinkie Pie like he was scared of her. He must've read Cupcakes.....

Pinkie giggled. "He must be busy!" She exclaimed, a thought then flashed through her mind once again...And it made her sad.

Pinkie frowned. "Why....Why did I have to say CUPCAKES of all things?" She suddenly perked up again. "Oh well! Maybe Freddie's kids will cheer me up. They seem like FUN!" She then bounced off happily in the direction of Sweet Apple Acres.

Meanwhile.....

"You're an idiot...." Marcus said, walking with the group. "You know that, right?"

Freddie raised an eyebrow at Marcus's comment. "The fuck you talking about?"

Marcus sighed. "Pinkie Pie is going to drive your children to SUICIDE....."

Freddie laughed. "Oh please, Marcus. That's silly."

Marcus grabbed Freddie's by his shoulders, and forcefully turned him towards him. "LOOK AT ME......." Marcus said sadly.

Freddie snickered. "Yeah...You're pretty fucking ugly."

Marcus growled. "No, you moron! Look at what that pony has done to me!" Marcus had black bags under his eyes, and his mane had been a mess since he came to Ponyville.

"You only look like that because you have sex with your pillow every night." Punk said, chuckling.

Marcus's eyes widened. "How did he know about that?!" Marcus thought. "Fuck you, Brooks. That pony is fucking LOCO! Your children will be eaten ALIVE by the time we get back!"

Freddie chuckled. "Comeon, dude....How bad could it be?"

Yes. How bad could it be?

...........WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERYONE ALWAYS ASK THAT QUESTION?

---------TO BE CONTINUED-----------

The Fallen Tears of a Broken Soul

Nova walked around Ponyville, trying to find something, ANYTHING to do. All his human friends were gone, and none of the ponies seemed to enthusiastic about hanging out with him, except one, and the one that did, Nova had figured out was much weirder than himself.

"Holy shit...." Nova said out loud. The streets weren't busy, so no one could hear him. "I wonder how all of my subscribers feel right now....I'm not there, and I probably wont be back for a LONG ass while." Nova frowned. Wrestling was a hobby, but YouTube? YouTube was Nova's main job, it's where everything began. It was way more enjoyable than that Twizzlers factory he had to work alongside his mom with was. To Nova, nothing was better than playing video games, and getting paid, it was...A dream job.

Nova knew how whiny his fans were, always asking for more content than Nova was already putting out. Sometimes, he would upload 7 videos at a time, and his fans would STILL ask for more! Sometimes, it was unnerving to Nova, he just wanted to text-yell "SHUT THE HELL UP!" to them.

But, Nova still stayed, as only a majority of his fans were bitchy and needy, the others were the greatest fans a YouTuber could ask for. Nova had over 4 million subscribers, but he never sold out, like Ray William Johnson did. Nova never disabled comments permanently from every single one of his videos like Ray William Johnson did, Nova isn't gay like Ray William Johnson is. Yup, Nova hates Ray William Johnson.

He hoped he would get home soon. He was ready to upload videos right now, but the only computer in Equestria, which was Zane and Nathan's, was destroyed. And even so, it's not like Nova could record anything here. No TV, no Xbox 360, no Playstation 3, no Camera, Nova had taken nothing with him from Earth except his sense of humor.

Nova was now on the outskirts of Ponyville, he had walked a pretty fair distance. He wasn't even paying attention to how far he had walked, he was so busy in his own thoughts, but when he finally snapped back to reality, he noticed he was right in front of a farm.

The farm was definitely not Sweet Apple Acres. The barn was in much better shape, it looked brand new. It had some type of fence set up, one that looked like it could protect the owner from the apocalypse.

For some reason, the farm looked eerily familiar to Nova, but he couldn't figure out why.....

"It almost looks like...." Nova began to put his thoughts into words. "No, can't be...." Nova decided he would check this out to see if his suspicions were true.

Nova walked up to the front door, and politely knocked, if who he thought would answer the door answered the door, this would be the greatest moment in Nova's life....

After a few moments, the door swung open, and standing there, was a grey pony, with grey hair, and a grey beard as well. His cutie mark was a piece of dry land, how....Interesting.....

Nova frowned mentally. Nope, this obviously wasn't who he thought it was..... "Oh, I'm sorry, sir....I....Thought you were someone else. I'll be on my wow now." He began to walk off, but the pony stopped him.

"Hold on, now traveler." The pony said, putting a hoof on Nova's shoulder, and stopping him in his tracks. The voice sounded familiar, though... "I can't have you walkin' around here while The Walkers are nearin'!" Nova's jaw dropped.

"He....Knows about....WALKERS?' Nova thought. "Maybe....This IS him...." He hoped for the best, but didn't want him to know he knew what he was talking about.

".....Walkers?" Nova asked curiously.

"That's why I've been callin' em'." The pony said. "Real menacing things. Prey on the innocents. Come around in a pack or two. They have no leader, and only one goal...."

Nova gulped. "What's their goal?"

The pony now had a tint of confidence in his eyes, like he had dealt with these "Walkers" before. ".......KILL." He said silently, and painfully. "Their goal is to kill innocent ponies....And eat their brains." He noticed the fear in Nova's eyes. "That right there was my reaction when I first found out about the things, but it's as true as the sun shines in the morning. They don't eat hay, just brains."

Nova trembled. "What IS a Walker exactly, though?" He asked.

The pony had a "pull-up-a-chair-while-I-tell-you-a-story" look on his face. "It's the rotted flesh of dead ponies that has been haunted by a curse. The curse was said to have spread through the local cemetery a few years ago. It awoke the ponies from the dead, but they could not leave their graves so early."

"Why not?" Nova asked.

"Warmth." The pony said simply. "They were under them graves for so long, when they came back from the dead, their bodies were freezing cold. So they needed to wait a few years before they could come out of the ground, and kill us."

"Don't you think that is just an folk-tale?" Nova asked with uncertainty. He knew Zombies didn't exist, except in TV Shows and Movies.

""Folk"?" The pony said, confused. "You must mean PONY-tale, boy." Nova facehoofed mentally. He wasn't use to this fucking pony language! "And no, it's nothin' but real, I can assure you. I went to the cemetery last year to pay tribute to my mother, and I could hear her groaning underground. And if that wasn't enough, I heard ALL of them ponies making a heap of noise. I researched, and my story is what came up. Historians have studied the curse, so no, it's not a pony-tale."

Nova still didn't believe this crazy old man, but he went along with it, non-the-less. "How do you....Stop Walkers?" He asked.

"Simple...." The pony said, grinning. He went back inside his house, and seconds later he was back on his porch, holding a Shotgun. "You fight like hell!" The pony proclaimed.

"Okay....This MUST be him." Nova though happily. Nova grinned. "I like that idea!"

The pony rose an eyebrow while chuckling. "You're a fighter, huh?" Nova nodded. "Good. Aren't many ponies like you here, son...."

"Tell me about it..." Nova replied, rolling his eyes. "The ponies in this city are big pussies."

The pony laughed. "Damn right! I'm originally from Poney Island. Lots of two-faced bastards there, but atleast they knew how to survive! Where you from, kid?"

"Fuck......" Nova thought. "Now I've gotta lie....." "I'm from....Detrot." Nova said, hoping that was a real city in Equestria.

The pony snickered. "And you're still alive? That's a pretty poverty-plagued city to live in."

"Wow....." Nova thought. "All I did was combine the Troit in Detroit with trot! Damn this is easy..." "Well, I'm just a survivor I guess."

The pony nodded understandingly. "You got a place to stay, kid?"

"Yeah, I live in Cloudsdale." Nova answered.

The old pony looked at Nova's wings admirably. "Impressive. You could be a great help in the war against The Walkers!" He exclaimed, smiling widely.

"I'll be happy to kick some dead ass!" Nova exclaimed. "But, how are we supposed to protect ourselves when the Walkers arrive?"

The pony chuckled. "Well, my farm is protected by that there fence." The pony gestured towards the all wooden fence. "It may not look like much, but Walkers aren't very powerful. They wont be able to break it. It's sturdy. But the rest of the ponies? Hell, it ain't my problem. They'll have to make their OWN fences."

"Damn.....What a dick...." Nova thought.

The pony smiled. "But, when you see them Walkers coming, you just fly on over to this farm, and we'll get to killin'. Sound good?"

Nova nodded. "I'm down."

"Good." The pony said, still smiling. "My name's Hershel, by the way....Hershel Greene."

Nova was doing backflips inside his mind. "HOLY SHIT! IT REALLY IS HIM!" He thought. "But, it looks NOTHING like him....THE FUCK?"

Suddenly, another pony came outside with Nova and Hershel. He looked like a young colt. He had black comb-over hair, and his Cutie-Mark was a blank piece of wood. What in the hell?

"Dad," The boy said. "Think we should work on that fence some more?"

"Well..." Hershel began. "It looks sturdy enough, but what the hell? Can never be too sure!"

The boy nodded, he then noticed Nova. "Who's this?" He asked.

"I was just about to get his name before you came out here." Hershel replied. "What IS your name, son?"

Nova wouldn't need to lie about this. "My name's James Wilson." He answered. "I like to be called Nova, though."

Hershel nodded. "Well, James, would you mind helping me and Shawn here build this fence?"

"Shawn.....?" Nova thought confusingly. "I didn't know Hershel had a son..." Nova quickly remembered something, and mentally facehoofed once again. "This is Hershel from the Walking Dead VIDEO GAME, not the TV Show! I FUCKING HATE THE VIDEO GAME HERSHEL!!!!!!!!!"

"Your son sucks, and so do you." Nova replied boldly. The hell is he thinking?! HE'S GOT A FUCKING SHOTGUN!

Hershel and Shawn immediately glared angrily at Nova for his comment. "Who the HELL do you think you are?!" Hershel yelled.

Nova smirked. "I'm you." He answered.

Hershel's eyes widened. "I was gonna blow your head off right now....But, since you're me....I'll just say this: GET. OFF. OF. MY. LAND!"

"Kay." Nova said simply, and walked off of Hershel's farm. Hershel began shaking his hoof in the air angrily. "I HOPE THE WALKERS TEAR YOU ALIVE!" He yelled. "And when they do, don't you even THINK about coming back on MY land!"

Nova squealed in fan-boy delight. Even though this wasn't the LEGIT Hershel, Nova was still excited beyond belief to get booted off of Hershel's land! He would DEFINITELY have to brag to Dan about this when he got home.

Meanwhile.....

At the same time Nova had left a farm, Pinkie Pie was approaching a different farm. Sweet Apple Acres. She happily hopped in sync with the "Smile" song she was humming. She hadn't babysat since Pound and Pumpkin Cake were in town....She missed them dearly, but those things were a NIGHTMARE to babysit! She figured three 10 year olds would be so much easier.

She saw the boys slowly picking up the Apples that Big Mac had bucked down, and putting them into baskets. She could tell the boys were....Lazy....REALLY lazy, looked like they thought their back would break everytime they reached down for an Apple.

"Hiiiii, booooooys!" Pinkie exclaimed in a singing voice as she hopped over to Freddie's kids. They looked EXTREMELY displeased to see her, and Damian even groaned.

"No.....Not YOU." Damian said unenthusiastically. His ears were still ringing from all the talking Pinkie did at the party last night. Plus, she was a girl, so that didn't help any.

"YES! Yes me!" Pinkie said happily.

"Well, howdy Pinkeh Pie," Big Mac said smiling, sweat dribbling down his face. "What can ah help ya with?"

"Sorry to say, Big Mac," Pinkie began. "But, I've been chosen to babysit your little helpers!" Damian, Kit and Tate immediately groaned loudly. "I need to take them back to Sugarcube Corner until Freddie gets back."

Big Mac smiled. "Not a problem, Pinkeh. I can handle all'a this work by mahself. Besides, these boys are a bit....Lazy. No offense to you boys."

"None taken." Tate replied with a Derpy face.

Pinkie hopped in excitement. "Yay! Comeon, boys! Let's gogogogogoGOOOOOOO!" She giggled as she hopped away. Even though they didn't want to, they followed Pinkie, but with extremely disappointed looks on their face.

When they were gone, Big Mac wondered something. "Ah wonder wha Freddie didn't just let ME babysit his kids...." He quickly shrugged. "Probably cuz I'm too busy." He then went back to work, having to buck the Apples AND put them in the basket.

Meanwhile.....

"So, Freddie...." CM Punk whispered to Freddie. "Why didn't you just let Big Mac babysit your kids? I mean, he was gonna be at the farm all day, anyway. Plus, he's dependable and Trustworthy."

Freddie chuckled. "While he MAY possess those qualities and more, he ALSO possesses the quality of being somepony who bangs his own sister. He may try to have sex with some of MY family as well."

Punk laughed. "You are such a horrible father, you know that?"

Freddie glared at Punk. "At least I AM a father...."

Punk rolled his eyes. "Yeah, a BAD one!" He then began to laugh some more as Freddie scowled. They and the rest of the gang continued to walk to their destination.

Meanwhile....

Nova had continued to walk after leaving Hershel's Land. He was still beside himself. He had gotten yelled at by HERSHEL! What a great day this was! Nova was now back in the suburb part of Ponyville, where a lot of houses resided. Nova noticed one particular house in the middle of the suburb. It was a green house, with 5 windows, 2 between the door, and the other 3 in a row upstairs. Basically...It looks like this:

Sitting on the pavement by the house, was a child wearing a red coat, yellow gloves, brown jeans, black snow-shoes, and a blue beanie. Nova could tell, he was visibly obese for his age, and he looked extremely sad, like something was bothering him, and he too....Looked eerily similar.

"Is that.....CARTMAN?" Nova thought. He was beyond confused, that was for sure. Hershel, Shawn, and now Cartman? Unless it was a mistake, the resemblance was uncanny, except this Cartman was in pony form. Nova walked up the the boy curiously.

"Hey, little guy, what's wrong?" Nova asked, smiling. And if he knew Cartman like he did from South Park, he figured he'd cuss him out....

....He was right.

Cartman turned to Nova, a pissed off look on his face. "The hell? You damn pedo! You can't rape me, dammit! I'LL CALL THE COPS ON YOU!"

"Yup..." Nova thought. "DEFINITELY Cartman..." He decided he would play this game.

"Wow. Fuck you, ya raging fatass." Nova exclaimed. "I just came over here to see why your pissy ass was looking so down, but I guess you're just such a fucking loser you wont even let anyone strike a conversation with you! YOU FUCKING SUCK."

"My god...." Cartman says, an impressed yet surprised look on his face, he soon turned angry again, though. "Hey! I'M NOT FAT, I'M BIG BONED!!!!!"

Nova smirked. "Whatever, dude...Go suck a dick..." Nova began to walk off.

"WAAAAIIITTT!" Cartman yelled, causing Nova to stop. "Who the hell are you?"

"Name's Nova. Who the fuck are you?!"

Cartman smiled. "I'm Eric Cartman, you fucking hooker!"

Nova smirked. "Fuck you, cum-squeeze! I bet your mom eats 20 dicks a day!" Cartman suddenly frowned. "Hey, the hell, man?"

Cartman sniffled. "That's actually why I'm so pissed right now, Nova....You're right. My mom, is the Village Whore. See, we just moved here along with my other friends, Stan, Kyle and Kenny from South Park, the coldest city in Equestria."

"Is that why you're wearing all those fucking Eskimo clothes?" Nova asked, chuckling.

Cartman laughed. "Yeah. I'm just....So used to the cold, these clothes have pretty much become a part of my thing. But anyway, we've only been here since Monday, and my mom has fucked atleast 10 guys a day since then."

Nova got a disgusted look on his face. "Holy shit, man.....Was she always like this?"

"Oh hell yeah." Cartman answered. "She used to fuck more in South Park. I first caught here when I was 3, and she lied and told me it was "To gain heat." Which, actually kinda makes sense, since ya know, we lived in a cold-ass place, and warmth was a top priority." Nova nodded. "But I figured out when I was 8, she was just having sex...And LOTS of it....I was hoping she would stop once we move here. Ya know, since moving usually takes a toll on everyone. But fuck no, she fucked 5 guys at ONCE in the same day!"

Nova shook his head in disgust. "That's fucking gross, man...."

Cartman nodded. "I know dude! That's why I'm out here....I can't be in there when she's fucking. The noises she makes....Makes me wanna puke! I'm always outside with my friends, exploring, because of her and her.....Fetishes." Cartman cringed at what he had seen his mother do to some colts.

"You probably don't get ANY attention, do you?" Nova asked, concerned.

Cartman hung his head. "Nope. She's always fucking. We NEVER get to spend time. I don't have a dad, not sure where he is, never met him, and my mom never even talks about him. My mom tells me she loves me and all that basic shit, but, honestly....I don't love her. I just deal with her because....Well, I've got nowhere else to go." Some tears started to form in Cartman's eyes.

Nova felt genuinely sorry for this kid. South Park hardly ever allowed Cartman to cry in an episode, he was supposed to be the tough fat kid who could be fazed by nothing, but it seemed Cartman was reaching his breaking point here in Equestria.

"I know that's fucked up...." Cartman continued. "Not loving your mom, but I honestly feel she loves complete strangers more than her own son....Sometimes...I just feel like...Running away. Running away, and never coming back. Right now, is one of those times....I've had enough, Nova. I'm tired of this shit....." Finally, a tear escaped Cartman's eyes, and hit the pavement.

Nova still felt extremely sad for this kid. To have your own Mother, not even....Care about you? Nova couldn't imagine what that must've been like. His mother didn't fuck 10 guys a night, probably because she was a fat-ass, but that's another story for another time. (Be pretty interesting to make, too.) Nova suddenly smiled.

"Hey, Cartman...." Nova said, looking down at the boy.

"Y-yeah....?" A now sobbing Cartman asked, his eyes beginning to turn red.

"I have an idea." Nova said, smiling even more now.

Cock-Block

"You sure you wanna do this?" Nova asked Cartman, who was still sitting on the pavement. This had all happened too fast. One minute, Nova meets Hershel, and then the next, if THAT isn't fucked up enough, he meets Eric Cartman. Something is wrong with Equestria, that's for sure....

Cartman looked back at his house, if he had fists, he would be clenching them out of total anger. Cartman looked up at Nova with gritted teeth.

"Hell yeah, I wanna do this, dude!" Cartman exclaimed. "My living conditions suck complete ASS!"

Nova sighed. "Okay, man....But, don't you think this is a little...Harsh? I mean, she IS your mother."

Cartman rose an eyebrow angrily. "Yeah! She's my whoreish mother! Who never pays any attention to her only son!"

"Hey, so she likes sex, dude." Nova argued.

"Oh yeaaahhh...." Cartman replied with frustration. "She likes sex A LOT! So much that her own son is replaced with some tall guy whose dick is the size of a paper-clip! Hey, I'm surprised she doesn't have atleast 20 sons with the number of times she bones a day!"

"Poor kid...." Nova thought sadly. "But, It's his life...."

"Let's go, Nova." Cartman said impatiently.

"You do realize this is going to be a long shot, right?"

Cartman looked down sadly. The plan Nova had certainly was complicated. If it didn't work, Cartman would be screwed, but he was screwed enough living with his whore of a mother. "I have faith, dammit....."

Nova chuckled. "Good, cuz I sure as hell don't." Nova gestured to Cartman to start walking. "Let's go."

Cartman followed Nova. Since there were no cars, they would have to hoof it. But the FPS wasn't too far away from Cartman's house.

Meanwhile......

Damian, Kit and Tate groaned with each hop Pinkie Pie took. Why did of all ponies that their father could have chosen to babysit them, did he have to chose the most annoying one of them all? It all made sense, though. Pinkie Pie was the equivalent of their father, just in pony and girl form.

"Come-on, you silly willies!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Stop acting all mopey dopey and come on and hoppy woppy with me!" The boys groaned at all the baby talk.

"Don't you....Ever talk...Normal?" Damian asked, quite curious. "Or...Ya know....Ever stop talking.....AT ALL?"

Pinkie giggled. "Don't like the baby talk, huh?" The boys shook their head vigorously. "Okay, I'll stop! I mean, you're all three pretty mature little colts, aren't you?"

"We sure are!" Tate exclaimed while Pinkie his nose. Pinkie cringed.

Kit jabbed his elbow into Tate's stomach. "Tate! That's disgusting!"

Tate grumbled. "You're just jealous cuz I have a girlfriend."

Pinkie immediately beamed with excitement. "Oh yeah! You and Scootaloo are eachother's very special somepony, that's right! You two want me to throw a party in honor of your special somepony-ship?"

"Scootaloo is NOT Tate's girlfriend, Pinkie Pie." Kit replied.

"That's right." Damian added. "All she did was plant one of her GROSS little girly kisses on him when he wasn't paying attention."

Pinkie frowned. "I thought you told me you liked her last night, Tate?"

Tate nodded with a smirk. "I do."

Kit rose an eyebrow. "Then why did you avoid her ALL of last night?"

"Ummmmm......" Tate scratched his chin in confusion, he then suddenly grinned. "Cuz she's a chicken! And chickens are SUPPOSED to be ignored!" Damian and Kit facehoofed in response.

Pinkie giggled. "A chicken? That's silly! Scootaloo isn't a chicken! I was a chicken for Nightmare Night last year, though. I pecked at the ground so much, it was almost like I was crazy or something!" Pinkie then laughed.

"ALMOST?!" Damian exclaimed. "Ummm....I think you've got that statement ALL screwed up, sister."

Pinkie looked at Damian confusingly. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you're loco!!!!!!!" Tate exclaimed happily.

Pinkie grinned widely. "LOCO IN THE COCO?"

"No, no, Pinkie...." Kit said. "Forget Damian said anything...."

Pinkie frowned. "I wanna be loco in the coco...." She then began hopping up and down. "I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA!"

"Oh no...." Kit groaned, burying his face in his hooves. He then glared at Damian. "Look at what you started!"

Damian gasped. "Me?! Numbskull over here HAD to answer her when we just could've told her to ignore it!"

Tate said nothing. He just looked at his brothers with a Troll face.

"I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA!" Pinkie continued to whine, and then Horsepower trotted up and began hopping as well.

Now both Pinkie and Horsepower were whining at the same time. "I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA! I WANNA!"

"Oh no....." Kit groaned once again. "Now Brock Lesnar's joined in, as well!"

By now, many ponies were staring, and it made Damian and Kit quite uncomfortable. They were used to their father doing outrageous things, but he just yelled, he didn't hop up and down like a little gay.

"ALRIGHT!" Kit screamed. "You're both loco in the coco!"

"YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" Horsepower screamed. "I. LIKE. COOOOOOOOCCCCCCCOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!" Horsepower was satisfied, so he ran off to most likely drink some cocoa.

"Yay!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Loco! Loco! Loco! I'm LOCO in the COCO!" Pinkie sang.

Tate soon joined in along with Pinkie. "Loco! Loco! Loco! I'm LOCO in the COCO!"

Pinkie giggled. "Come-on, Damian and Kit! Sing with us!"

Kit and Damian rubbed the back of their necks awkwardly. Half of Ponyville was gawking at them, even though they seemed to be enjoying the show that was being put on for them.

"No thank you...." Kit said.

"Yeah." Damian said, smirking. "Singing is for girls and wussies."

Then, something unexpected happened. Pinkie Pie's mane turned into fire. She grew a disgusted but also evil look on her face. "SING WITH UUUUUUSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!" She commanded in a demonic tone. Kit and Damian jumped back in fear.

Pinkie blushed from embarrassment as her mane turned back to it's original Pink color. "Heh heh....Sorry, guys. That's only the second time that voice has ever come out. The first was when Applejack broke a Pinkie Promise. Oh! Which reminds me, don't break a Pinkie Promise."

Damian and Kit nodded, still in shock. They decided they would sing along. After all, they kinda wanted to keep their life....

"Loco, Loco, Loco....I'm loco in the coco...." Kit and Damian sang unenthusiastically, while Tate and Pinkie sang with pride and happiness.

Pinkie giggled. "Not big singers, are ya?" She asked Damian and Kit.

"Like I said." Damian replied. "Singing is for girls and wussies."

Pinkie giggled. "You remind me of Marcus SOOOOOO much, Damian!" Damian smirked, taking that as a compliment. After all, Marcus was a bad-ass.

"Who do I remind you of?" Tate asked excitedly.

"MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Pinkie exclaimed, highhoofing Tate.

"Heck yes!" Tate exclaimed, grinning happily.

Kit sighed. "Who do I remind you of?" He asked, not caring about the reply.

Pinkie giggled. "TWILIGHT!" Kit's eyes bulged.

"No way!" Kit thought. "That has to be a MISTAKE!"

Damian was laughing, however. "I knew you were a nerd, dude!"

Kit glared at Damian. "I'm not a nerd! I'm just...."

"Nerd-LIKE?" Tate suggested, but that wasn't any better.

"NO!" Kit yelled. "I'm not a nerd, and I'm not nerd-LIKE. I'm just..."

"A smarty-pants?" Pinkie answered for Kit.

"....Close enough." Kit said, frustrated.

"Yay!" Pinkie cheered. "I was right!"

"Actually," Kit continued. "You were HALF right. Which means, you weren't FULLY right." Damian chuckled at his nerd brother, while Pinkie seemed impressed.

"Wowwy, Kit!" Pinkie exclaimed. "You may be smarter than Twilight, even!"

"Naaahhhh...." Damian said, snickering. "Twilight's a WAY bigger nerd than Kit!"

"Excuse me?" Said a voice, Pinkie and the boys turned around, and Twilight was walking up to them.

Damian gulped. "Oh crap..." He thought.

"Ooooohhhh...." Tate said aloud to Damian. "You're gonna GET iiiitttt!"

"Hi, Twilight!" Pinkie exclaimed, waving to her friend.

"Hello, Pinkie...." Twilight said, but she didn't wave back, she just continued to stare through Damian's soul.

"Twilight?" Pinkie said worriedly. "You okay?"

Twilight nodded absentmindedly. "I'm fine, Pinkie." She then furrowed her eyes at Damian. "I just couldn't help but notice young Damian here calling me a....What was it again, Damian?"

Damian began sweating. This was worse than a scolding from Ms. Cheerilee. "Ummm..."

"He called you a nerd!" Tate answered for his brother, grinning widely.

"Yeah....Thanks, bro...." Damian thought, glaring at his brother. "I hope Scootaloo falls again..."

"Oh? Is that so?" Twilight replied. "Why would you say something like that, Damian?"

"Now wait, Twilight...." Pinkie said, getting in between the two. "I'm sure Damian didn't mean it! Right, Damian?"

All Damian could do was sweat, and gaze upon Twilight's glare. He was frozen stiff. "Uhhhhh....."

Twilight would have none of it. "I am not, in any way, shape, or form....A "nerd." And it's not very polite to say something like that, Damian. I thought your father taught you better than that."

"Damian just does not listen." Kit said, smirking.

"Well..." Twilight continued. "He may want to start. Or else he's going to wind up with an angry Ponyville mob chasing him straight out of town. Do I make myself clear?" She got close to Damian's face.

Damian could only nod. He was beside himself. No pony, no girl, especially a NERDY GIRL had the right to scold him like that!

"Good." Twilight said, beginning to walk off, but still keeping her glare on Damian only. "I will see you later Pinkie. You too, Kit and Tate." She smiled at Kit and Tate, but then glared at Damian again.

"Bye, Twilight!" Pinkie exclaimed, waving along with Kit and Tate.

Pinkie then frowned at Damian. "Awwww. I'm sorry, Damian."

"About what?" Was all Damian could say. He was still looking at Twilight, who was walking backwards, STILL glaring at Damian.

"Freaking creepy...." Damian thought. "Why doesn't she take a picture? It'll last longer." Damian said aloud this time.

Pinkie smiled, and immediately pulled a camera from deep underneath the ground. "Dunno, Damian. But I'd be happy to take a picture of you!"

Damian's left eye began twitching. "Where did you....?"

Pinkie giggled. "The ground."

"But....How...?" Damian stuttered. This place was a LOT more weirder than the locker room. There were only sweaty apes there, Ponyville had horses whose sweat smelt of butterscotch. In the end, butterscotch-sweat beats regular sweat any day of the week.

"Two words:" Pinkie replied. "Camera....Emergencies...." She then giggled, and took a picture of Damian standing there with a WTF face. "Ohhh.....I'm framing this one!"

".....Cool?" Was all Damian could say.

"You're the best babysitter EVER, Pinkie Pie!" Tate exclaimed.

"Oh....What a kiss-butt." Damian thought,

Pinkie hugged Tate with glee. "Yay! I KNEW I was cut out for this! Thank you, Tate-Tots!" Pinkie giggled, and then quickly frowned. "Oh....Sorry. I forgot, you three don't like baby talk."

Tate laughed. "Nicknames isn't baby talk! That nickname is pretty catchy, too!"

Pinkie smiled with joy. "Yay! Tate-Tot! Ummm....Kit-Kat.....Aaaanddddd.....DAME-DOG!"

"What the....?" Damian replied. "Dame-dog?"

"AWWWWWW YEEEAAAHH!" Pinkie exclaimed, grabbing a visor from out of nowhere, and throwing it on Damian's head. "Lay down some sick rhymes, Dame-dog!"

"........................................................................................................." Silence in-sued.

Pinkie giggled. "Maybe some other time, then! Come-on, guys! Let's go have some FUN!" Pinkie grinned widely.

"Yay!" Tate yelled. Damian rolled his eyes.

"What kind of fun, Pinkie?" Kit asked curiously.

Pinkie gasped. "I know the PERFECT activity we can partake in!"

"WHAT IS IT?" The three boys asked simultaneously.

Pinkie giggled. "It's in my basement. Follow meeeeeee!" Pinkie hopped off, and as their legal guardian for the time being, the boys had no choice but to follow her.

Many minutes Later.....

Liane Cartman was in the midst of a steamy booty-call. This was her 6th bangarang of the day, and she was nowhere NEAR tired. She didn't know the guys name....."Doctor Booze" or something like that. Who cared? All she knew was this bastard was causing her juices to flow in indescribable ways.

Just minutes before Liane and her.....Boy-toy reached their breaking points....A knock on the door was heard.

"Oh my...." Liane said, inching her vagina away from her newest sex-partner's penis. The man frowned.

"Bloody hell! My Todger was ripe close to exiting in your back-slang!" The man said disappointingly.

Liane giggled. "Just let me see who this is. Then, when I come back, I'll finish you off." She winked, and then walked off.

"My, this is the best side of bangers and mash I've had in a long time!" The pony said, falling back down on the bed in exhaustion.

Liane opened the door, and standing in front of her, was a man in a royal blue collared shirt, and black pants. He was wearing glasses, and had a contract in hand.

"Liane Cartman?" The man asked, raising an eyebrow above his right frame.

"Yes?" Liane asked. Behind the colt, was her son, Eric, and a man she did not recognize, which was Nova.

"I'm Abuse Savior of the Foal Protective Services....We are here to take your child away."

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Nightmares In Paradise

Mature Rated Fiction

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