Twilight Sparkle eyed the report.
"An economic study and a witty retort?"
"Why can't our statistical staff ever agree?"
"Somepony has an idea, but the spending isn't free."
"Rather than squabbling about calculations and other drama--"
"I wish somepony could find a clear way to end the economic trauma!"

"Hey there, Miss Twilight, and good day," declared Fancy Pants.
"I can see from your face you feel like you've been smothered in ants--"
"So much anxiety, getting into your Equestrian Treasury job--"
"And though we've talked so much, I worry you think me a snob."

Twilight replied back, "Oh my! Certainly not."
She thought, "I just feel tense how you're so bucking hot!"
"Your mane slides along your back and you give it a shake--"
"Your handsome plot in my face as you turn has to be a fake--"
"No male should have curves that supple--"
"I want to reach out and pop it like a bubble!"

"Wait, something up?" Fancy asked, snapping Twilight back.
"You obsess in your work and you'll have a heart attack."
"Honestly, yes, it's time for a break," Twilight had to remark,
"I have a 'case of the mondays', and I should go out for some lark."

"Sure," Fancy said, and over his body slid.
"But I have a package here, just lift the lid."
Twilight gazed at the box wrapped in red all over.
Eyes growing wide, she turned white as the cliffs of Dover.
"This thing," she murmured, "it's right on your crotch."
"Of course," he replied, "it's something fun in a box."

"Not some ordinary present, nothing like say sox--"
"No book, or bit of candy, or bagels with lox--"
"It's a special surprise for our new employee here--"
"And that's you Twilight," he said, "so open it, dear."

"A 'Welcome to the Treasury Bureau Present'? I just--"
Twilight gulped. "I'm glad to have it, to join here in the 'upper crust'--"
"Being in an office with you, and all of the time you've flirted, so--"
"While I know you want me to lift the lid, I'd prefer to just go."
"Nonsense!" Fancy yelled out.
"Open the box, lest I pout."

Twilight obeyed, taking in a breath deep.
As she looked forward, she didn't make a peep.
Thinking, "Finally, he'll show off his thick, raw dick!"
"And like my dreams, in public, I'll ride his hard stick!"

It turned out to be a tie.
Twilight started to cry.

By: SwiperTheFox