It was Applejack's baby shower, and to be honest... Rainbow really hadn't expected such a huge turnout. Half of Ponyville had come, not to mention all of the Apple family. The crowd flowed right out of the house, into the barnyard, and all over Sweet Apple Acres. The cider stores were getting hard to keep wet. Thankfully some of the Apple family had brought their own along.

Rainbow Dash had needed to do much of the prep work herself. She had finally gotten the hang of fritters, and had spent the better part of the last few days helping Big Mac with making a big enough pile of them for the party.

“Everypony good?” she shouted over the crowd.

All the ponies in the farmhouse turned and offered a cheer to the soon-to-be papa-mother.

Sweet, thought Rainbow, and trotted over to the stairs. Applejack hadn't yet made an appearance. She was about to go up and drag her wife out of bed, when she heard hoofsteps in the hall.

“Applejack! You're up early!” Rainbow smirked sarcastically as the orange mare trudged down the staircase. Her eyes were bloodshot and sleepy. Her hair was a nitroglycerin-fueled train wreck.

Gosh she was pretty.

The crowd raised a happy congratulatory toast to the very-pregnant mother pony. Applejack made no indication she had even noticed them all and stalked with dedicated one-minded purpose to the kitchen door.

She emerged with her mouth gritted around the handle of the filled-to-the-brimmest, most-random-assorted-foodest picnic basket she'd ever seen.

Rainbow drifted over. “Hey gorgeous. Got enough to eat there?” She grinned and kissed her wife on the cheek.

Applejack dropped the basket with a frightened start and looked around in complete disarray.

Her eyes came to rest on Rainbow Dash again, and she took a deep breath.

“Oh, darlin', Ah am so sorry. Mah hormones are on the fritz all over again,” she said, rubbing her eyes with her hoof.

“Aww don't sweat it. Maybe you should go get back to bed. I'll sort out the gifts.”

“Thanks fer bein' so understandin'.” Applejack took another breath, reclaimed the picnic basket from the floor and trotted past her wife to the stairs. “Now if'n ya wouldn't mind gettin' up offa yer lazy *GUNSHOT*ing flank fer a change and goin' to town and buyin' me some *CRASH*ing strawberries at the *POP*ing store for the *NEIGH*ing strawberry cake Ah was gonna *HONK*ing make for this *CHAINSAW-REV*ing baby shower! HOW MANY *DONG*ING TIMES DO AH GOTTA ASK THE SAME *QUACK*ING QUESTION BEFORE AH SEE SOME *BURP*ING RESULTS?! AH GUESS AH'M *SQUEAK*ING GETTIN' WHAT AH *PARTYCANNONBLAST*ING DESERVE FER MARRYIN' A COMPLETE *MOO*-UP OF A WIFE! LUCKY-*BARK*ING-ME!”

SLAM!

Applejack's forceful slamming of the bedroom door upstairs shook the whole farmhouse. The sizable number of guests paled in consummate horror at the display and looked to Rainbow Dash for an explanation.

Rainbow sighed dreamily to the stairway and turned back to her guests with a grin.

“Oh, that's nothin'! You should see her on Tuesdays!”