What's that? You want humanized romance between Colgate and Berry Punch? Well have some!

This is something I wrote when I was bored during summer. It's rough, I know, and I haven't even looked at it since September. However, I thought it was a shame to let all of this go to waste, so I might as well let people see what I whipped up. I can't say I'll go back and edit this story with the advice of this community's astounding writers, sadly, but don't let that stop you from giving suggestions. I suck at writing romance.