“I can't believe you were just gonna up and leave without even saying a word to the family, that's just rude.” The cold metal of the knife held to my neck made my body tense, as I felt a shiver run down my spine. I swallowed hard and stared back into Apple Bloom's eyes, desperately searching for even the tiniest glimmer of her former self. I found nothing, only emptiness and the unshakable feeling of familiarity. I felt as if I was seeing through the eyes of one of my victims, drowning in the hopelessness and cold fear such a gaze instilled. Try as I might, I couldn't move, or speak, only fixating even more intently on Apple Bloom's smile and stare. To see it, I felt was to truly look upon myself . . . or the twisted depravity that dwelled within my soul. Still that depravity, that darkness, was a part of me. It was the part of me that I wished to be rid of and burdened with no longer.

“Please, Apple Bloom, put the knife away. I wasn’t trying to leave… I was just trying to come and thank your family. I wanted them to know I appreciated their help. I mean I haven’t seen them in so long, it’s only the right thing to do. Isn’t it?”

There you go, appeal to her insanity. Don’t try and convince her otherwise, just play along… That’s how you get out of this alive.

“Something tells me you’re lying, Dashie. It might be that little voice in your head, the one that I keep hearing whispers from. That’s why I think you’re nothing more than a Changeling, just some kinda shade or shadow. I think you were sent here to test me, to see if I’d give up and let you have your way, while you sabotaged the life we’ve managed to scrape by on.” Apple Bloom replied as she spoke in a hushed, crazed, tone that made my skin crawl.
“Voice in my head? How do you hear a voice in my head, Apple Bloom, that makes no sense?” I replied as I was taken back by her sudden statement.

“Don’t play dumb with me, Dashie,” she replied, her voice still and unwavering. “You’re like me, or at least like I used to be. Before I made the voice in my head be quiet.” She pressed the knife harder against my throat and leaned in closer, pushing her muzzle into my mane and inhaling deeply.

It’s official, this kid is more bucked up than you are . . . I don’t know if I should congratulate her or be worried for you.

“There it is again, Dashie. It’s speaking to you, telling you that I’m crazy, making you doubt me. You should learn to control it, teach it to be quiet.” She leaned back after she spoke and burst into laughter, the pupils of her eyes shrinking as she stared into my very soul. “Maybe the voice is actually you . . . maybe you really are just a shadow. I used to think of mine the same way, but then I realized the voice WAS me.”

“Apple Bloom, please, I don’t know what you’re talking about. There isn’t any voice in my head, just me, I promise.”

Oh? You finally gonna accept that we’re one in the same, or are you just lying to save your skin? If it’s the former then I’m touched, I’m still gonna kill you, but touched nevertheless.

I wanted nothing more than to tell my darkness to be quiet, to hold her tongue and give me a moment to think. However the situation I found myself in made me wonder if I could even get out of this . . . this madness.

“Why do you keep lying to me Dashie, don’t you know how badly lying hurts the ones you love?” She moved the knife from my throat, keeping me pinned to the wall with her free hoof as she pointed the knife at my chest. “Maybe I can help you, keep that voice from making you lie to me.” As she spoke she slowly pressed the tip of the knife against me, until I could feel it begin to cut through my flesh.

“Apple Bloom, stop this, please, I’m begging you.” I cried out as she steadied her hoof and held the knife still, a small bit of blood trickling from the fresh incision. I frantically looked around the room behind her, and felt my heart nearly stop as I noticed the bodies of Big Mac and Granny Smith. They looked as if they were looking at us, watching what Apple Bloom was doing, their decayed, featureless faces giving off a look of disapproval and disappointment.

“I’ll stop just as soon as you stop lying to me, Rainbow.” She replied with the same smile that my dark side often bore at me. “So tell me, what is that voice in your head telling you? Is it telling you to kill me, to stop me? Is it telling you to take my life and the life of my family?” She went silent and just continued to smile, her gaze unwavering as I trembled there.

“There . . . there is a voice.” I finally said, nearly choking on my own words. “It haunts me and tells me horrible, unspeakable things.” I said as I began to tear up.

What the buck are you doing? What does telling a crazy pony you’re also crazy accomplish?

Apple Bloom pulled the knife back and chuckled, licking my blood from it. “See Dashie, that wasn’t hard.”She released me and took a few steps back, that damnable smile of hers still present. “Don’t worry, like I said, I had a voice too. I was able to quiet it though, because I came to accept it as my voice. When I did, I was able to reclaim my life, my family, my world.”

I turned my attention back to the bodies of Big Mac and Granny Smith, then back to Apple Bloom, my heart racing with a mix of fear and unease. “Apple Bloom . . . You gave into your darkness.” I began as she suddenly sneered at my words.

“DARKNESS!” She shrieked in reply, pointing the knife at me once more. “I was trapped in darkness! Everything was taken from me! I was left all alone in the one place I thought would always be safe! Then one day you come through and paint it red with blood, then just up and leave! You didn’t even come to check on any of us! You left me in a world of darkness, solitude and suffering!”

“I didn’t know.” I replied as guilt washed over me. “The Diamond Dogs, I thought they killed everypony. I couldn’t bear the thought of it. So I killed them! I made them pay for their crimes, buried the dead and went on my way.”

“”Well if you would have taken the time to look you could have found me! You could have found Spike! You could have found Sweetie!”

“Spike and Sweetie are alive!?” I asked suddenly shocked by this revelation.

“Oh they’re alive, but they did like you. They abandoned our home, abandoned me.” Apple Bloom said as she growled in anger. “I was totally alone, and then the voice found me, it called to me, from somewhere deep within myself. It told me that my family was still alive, that my life hadn’t been lost. I had to go dig up my poor brother,” she said suddenly pointing behind her to Big Mac. “You buried him alive, I could hear him calling out to me, and Granny just decided to start talking again one day. The voice in my head told me I just needed to listen.”

You know there is a door behind you, I say turn tail and run . . . This can only end badly otherwise.

I let out a frustrated sigh and rubbed my head, when Apple Bloom was suddenly upon me again, her muzzle barely touching mine.

“What's it saying, Dashie? Is it telling you to run? Telling you that I’m crazy!?” Apple Bloom shouted as she swung the blade up at me. I leapt to side barely avoiding her strike, as I felt a small trickle of blood running down my cheek. “I’m not crazy! I thought I was! I thought I’d lost it, but I’m more sane than anypony alive! SHUT UP APPLEJACK!” She roared suddenly, swinging the knife wildly as she grabbed at her head. “AJ doesn’t want me to hurt you, Dashie-poo, but I think that’s the only way I can get you to understand.”

“Understand what!?” I shouted as I backed away from her. “Just tell me what you want me to understand!?”

“We all have a darkness inside us, Rainbow. The question is will you let it control you, or will you be like me and control it?” She replied, suddenly she was calm and reserved. She slowly moved towards me waving the knife playfully. “How about we cut the darkness out of you? We’ll get it out one organ at a time, until that voice in your head goes quiet.” Her smile spread broad across her face once more, her eyes showing an unsettling serenity. “Then we can put them back and you can stay with us, join our family like AJ always wanted you too.”

Every red flag that has ever existed is going up and you’re just standing here like an idiot . . . Maybe you should take her up on that offer since you don’t seem that concerned by it.

“BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE BUCK UP!” I roared taking Apple Bloom and myself both off guard. I quickly looked to the door behind me, then back to Apple Bloom, my chest suddenly tightening as I strained to breathe.

Enough of this nonsense!

My darkness suddenly said as my body began to burn, my head ringing in pain. “W-what?” Without any warning I rushed Apple Bloom, knocking the knife from her hoof as I spun and kicked her across the room. She slammed into the couch, Big Mac’s body shifted and feel on top of her, then she let out a shrill scream. “What the hell are you doing?”

What you refuse to do. The darkness replied in a cold tone.

I still couldn’t regain control of my body as it moved on it’s own, my dark half controlling it. “Give me back my body!” I shouted as I saw Apple Bloom desperately trying to move Big Mac’s body from on top of her. I walked over to knife and picked it up, slowly turning to face Apple Bloom and walk towards her.

This is my body! I’ve told you time and time again, it’s mine! YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED!

I fought against myself in vain as I continued my slow approach towards Apple Bloom.”You should have killed me when you had the chance,” I suddenly spoke, my voice my own but somehow different. Soon I stood over top the struggling Apple Bloom, looking down on her as she stared back at me with a look of fear. I lifted the knife and brought it down swiftly, stabbing into Big Mac’s decrepit body, the stench filling my lungs.

“Stop it! Your killing him!” Apple Bloom shouted as tears streamed down her face.

“You can’t kill what’s already dead, you little shit.” Once more I spoke, and once again the darkness spoke through me. “You should be more worried about yourself, because once I’ve shattered this little illusion of yours, I’ll take your pathetic life!” Again I raised the knife and stabbed the dead body of Big Mac, then again and again.

“He’s crying out in pain! Can’t you hear him!?” Apple Bloom shouted through her tears.

My body moved to stab him again, when I willed myself with all I had to stop. My body froze and I could almost feel the struggle happening within every fiber of my being.

You can’t stop me, only prolong the inevitable! My darkness shouted.

“I won’t let you kill her!” I shouted, finally my voice my own again. “I won’t allow you to kill her! To kill the only thing alive in this town that’s worth protecting!”

She is corrupted! Touched by the darkness and devoured by it, a darkness far different from me! She has been swallowed by misery and spat out as madness! She can never be who she once was! She’s already dead!

“You do not get to decide who lives and dies! You are not a god!” I roared back as the knife fell from my grasp and I stumbled back. I fell to my haunch and grabbed my head, pain rushing through every inch of my body as if I was laying across a raging flame.

You weak, pathetic, coward! You would be giving her mercy by killing her! Sparing her from this wretched existence she has!

“She can still be saved! I can save her! I can still correct the mistake I made by leaving that day, by not checking for survivors!” I said as tears streamed down my face, matting the fur beneath and around my eyes. I fell forward and slammed my forehooves down, as my jaw clenched. “I have to save her!”

Why? The darkness suddenly asked as calm and collected as ever. Do you want to save her because she deserves salvation, or is it to make yourself feel better? Do you think saving her will wash away the sins that you’ve amassed? Do you think sparing her will matter? IT WON’T!

“Shut up!” I shouted as I looked up and saw Apple Bloom rising to stand. “Apple Bloom . . . You have to run.” I said as I continued to fight against the darkness within.

“Why would I run?” Apple Bloom asked suddenly, swaying as she stood there, her face devoid of any emotion. “You attacked my brother . . . I have to avenge him. Because of you he’s dead, look at him, blood everywhere.” I was shocked and my eyes went wide in disbelief at her words. “Because of you, I’m covered in the blood of my brother, the blood of a poor, innocent, pony who believed in you.”

“Apple Bloom! Please!” I shouted in reply. “He was already dead . . . I watched him die! He’s part of the reason I slaughtered those Diamond Dogs, for what they did to him!”

“You slaughtered them because you were too afraid to save him! You felt guilty, because you could have saved him, and you just watched him die! Their deaths were your way of trying to make peace with yourself!”

For the first time since I woke up here, it was if the real Apple Bloom had spoken to me. She was crying, she acknowledge her brothers death . . . and my cowardice to act in the face of his imminent death. “Apple Bloom, I’m sorry.”

Yeah that’s gonna make all this go away, “I’m sorry” that you think that's gonna amount to shit with her. You should just stop this foolishness already, before you wind up dead, by my hoof or hers.

Apple Bloom’s entire body twitched and she lurched forward, an eerie low, cackle resonating from her.”I’ll make sure you’re sorry.” She said finally, twisting her body in an unnatural position, her ragged mane obscuring half of her face and the sick smile across it.

I told yo- . . .

“Buck off!” I shouted, forcing myself to stand. “Apple Bloom, let me help you!” I pleaded as I felt the pain in my body slowly disperse.

“You’ve helped me and my family enough, Rainbow Dash.” She replied as she walked over to Granny Smith’s body. She studied her body for a moment, rocking the chair gently, before leaning in closely and pressing her ear to the remains of Granny Smith’s muzzle. She stood there for a moment, suddenly her face became enraged and she lifted the chair, body and all, before throwing it at me. “Celestia damn you!” She shouted. “I waited so long to hear her voice, and now she’s fallen silent! She isn’t even breathing! You’ve killed my brother, my granny and my sister!”

“Apple Bloom listen to me, please. I didn’t kill your family!”

“They were alive until you turned back up! I could even hear AppleJack and now her voice is gone as well! Why did you have to come back!?” Suddenly Apple Bloom rushed me, I was still recovering from losing control to my darkness and couldn’t move in time, as she slammed into me. We rolled across the floor and I found her on top of me, her forehooves slamming down on me. I covered my face and tried to wrestle her from atop me, my darkness cackling within my mind, as I tried to fend her off without hurting her.
“Apple Bloom!”

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up and die! Die like everyone else!” She was crazed, what little sanity she had held too now completely gone. Gone was the young philly I once knew, now replaced with a mare too removed from reality to be called Apple Bloom, and yet I still wished to save her. I looked around for something, anything I could use to get her off of me, when I saw something.

“Forgive me, Granny Smith.” I said under my breath as I grabbed one of her skeletal legs, that had separated from her body when Apple Bloom threw her, and bashed Apple Bloom in the head with it. She rolled off of me and quickly leapt back to her hooves, her eyes more crazed than ever when she noticed what I was holding.

“You bitch!” She shouted as she charged at me again. This time I was able to dodge and rolled to the side, tossing away the bone and panting. She skidded to a halt and turned back towards me, suddenly noticing the knife from earlier on the ground. She reached down and grabbed it, a wicked laugh erupting from her as she brandished it at me. “I’m gonna gut you, like those monsters did to my brother, then dismember you like what you made me do to my granny . . . then I’ll get rid of your body like those bugs did my sisters.”

Tell her that her sister is alive.

“Apple Bloom I have to tell you something.” I said as I began to tremble. “AppleJack is-”

“Don’t you dare say her name!” She roared suddenly as she charged me, swinging the knife wildly. I backed up and suddenly found myself pressed against a wall with her drawing ever closer. I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t do anything and suddenly she was right on top of me. I grabbed at the knife and tried to move out of the way, we fell to the ground and wrestled for it, then suddenly the sound of metal cutting through flesh and we both went still.

Are you dead? Are we dead? Do we have a knife sticking in our gut?

I tried to tune out my darkness as my eyes met Apple Blooms and I could feel the warmth of blood washing over my forehooves. Her eyes were different, they were clear and beautiful as they had once been.

“Dashie . . . it hurts.” She said as tears slowly started to form in her eyes. I looked down and saw the knife buried deep in her chest and my hooves clenching it tight. I let go of the blade and pulled Apple bloom close as I held her, my own tears beginning to fall. “It hurts so much.” She said as she reached up and put a hoof to my cheek.

“Apple Bloom I’m so sorry, so, so sorry.” I said as my voice cracked. “ I just wanted to save you.”

“Rainbow.” She said weakly as she pulled the blade from her chest and let it fall to the floor, blood pooling from her wound. “Thank you . . . now I can see my family again . . . now I can see AppleJack.” She said as her chest heaved and hoof fell from my cheek. “Do you think AppleJack is waiting for me?”

“Y-yeah kid.” I said as I wiped the tears from her eyes. “Your sister is waiting for you, and so is everypony else.”

“That’s . . . that’s all I really wanted. . .” Apple Bloom went limp and I raised a hoof to close her eyes, as I pulled her tightly against me and cried into her mane. I lifted my head and shouted at the top of my lungs, a familiar pain engulfing me.

I can’t believe you lied to her . . . I mean I’m all about lying to ponies, but that just seems a bit harsh.

“BE QUIET! CELESTIA DAMMIT!” I shouted through the pain and grief. “I wanted to save her, to reunite her with her sister, and in the end I killed her. I tried so hard, and yet it ended just like it always does . . . somepony, or something, dead and my coat stained with blood.”

It’s who you are.

“It’s not who I am, it’s not.”

I sat there and held Apple Blooms body for what seemed like an eternity, staring at the young mare who I couldn’t save, staring at my failure. I finally took her body outside, along with Big Mac’s and Granny Smith’s. I spent three days at that place, a place that was once filled with happiness and love. I dug graves the first day, buried the bodies on the second, and on the third I set fire to the place. The fond memories of that place had been corrupted, now only misery and despair lingered within those walls and those were best put to the flame.

I stood there, as the sun sat behind me, watching the flames devour the former home of the apple family. My darkness was silent, but I knew she was watching in amusement finding elation in my suffering. Finally I turned to leave making my way towards Ponyville, with my sights set on the Everfree. I couldn’t explain it but something was calling me to the ruins of the Celestial Sisters castle and I felt as if the answers I needed to find, would be found there.