Dear Journal,

It snowed today. Snow out in the city is different than here. It’s always getting trampled underhoof... turned into slush by carriages and pedestrians. You never really see really fluffy snow, unless you’re on a roof. Here especially, since I’m so far out of the way, it’s totally undisturbed. Just a big field of virgin white.

It’s rather beautiful.

My first Winter out here I got so excited that I made snow-ponies, something I’d never done. They turned out kind of crap, but I had fun. I also learned that I actually had to shovel snow. Shoveling snow was markedly less fun. Fortunately, it was only a couple of inches deep this morning, so I didn’t have to worry about that just yet.

Ever since that Plume girl, I’ve been thinking about... well… stallions. Specifically I’ve been trying to figure out…I dunno… how I felt about being with them. When I think on it, I genuinely don’t think it ever bothered me. I’m having trouble accepting that though, because there are a lot of things that I don’t think used to bother me, but do now. Figging, for example. When I think back on it, I don’t remember it ever being something that I wouldn’t do. But at the same time, I know that if any of my clients asked me to today, I’d say no.

Now, I don’t... *sigh*... I don’t know what to make of that. Was I just that different of a pony back then, or is it something else?

Life in the stable was… chaotic. I mean… I imagine in most professions you clock in, go to work, go home, have dinner, hang out with friends or whatever, and then go to sleep. As an escort, you work when you work. Sometimes you’ve got a few days between appointments, sometimes you have ten minutes. Sometimes you work all night, sometimes you spend all day trying to pull in a customer to no avail.

I guess that lifestyle kind of puts you into a certain mindset. Work is work, and you take what you can get.

Maybe that’s the only reason I used to take male clients. Maybe it did bother me, but I didn’t let it because… you know… it was bits in my pocket.

I don’t know what to think right now.

Whatever the case, I had an appointment this morning.

I need to clarify: I went to the spa.

As it so happens I had an appointment with two mares this evening. Not with Aloe and Lotus, unfortunately. I’m still waiting for the two of them to come back to my bedroom. But, I decided it would be a good idea to have their masseuse work out all my knots before I potentially got tag-teamed.

I marched into town through the ice and snow. I think I may need to invest is a pair of snowshoes, the snow is supposed to get pretty deep this year, and I can’t exactly shovel the entire path to town, now can I? Either way, the walk into town was beautiful, if fairly exhausting.

The winter has its advantages when it comes to being inconspicuous. Ponies tend to stay indoors, so there are fewer gawkers. A lot of ponies wear pants when it gets cold, so I don’t stand out as much. Also, I can wear a big heavy coat with a hood that covers most of my face.

So I made my way to the spa. Once there, I was greeted with a nice wave of warmth. They were really cranking the heat; It felt almost oven-like. A smiling pink pony greeted to me from behind the counter. “‘Ello again, Meester Guilty.”

“Hi there…” ‘Shit. Is that Aloe or Lotus?’ “… you.” I blushed when I couldn’t remember which was which. I attempted to mask my embarrassment my hanging my coat up on the wall. I don’t think she noticed, honestly. “Is, uh… *ahem*… is Quake ready for me?”

“Not yet, Meester Guilty. I weell let you know.”

“Thank you.” I said. With nothing else to do,I grabbed a magazine and took a seat in their little reception area. Of course, all they had were those ridiculous celebrity gossip rags, which I’ve never really cared about. But hey, anything to pass the time, right?

Not long after I started reading about some nonsensical scandal involving some drug-addled actress, the door chimed. “Oh, meess Rarity, meess Flootershy. So good to see you again.” My ears perked up at the mention of Rarity. I peeked over the edge of my gossip rag. Sure enough Rarity had just stepped in to the Spa, along with some butter-yellow pegasus companion.

“Aloe, darling, it’s a pleasure to see you too. Fluttershy and I will have the usual.”

‘Oh hey, she said Aloe! Okay, so pink is Aloe. I should commit that to memory. Pink is Aloe. Pink is Aloe. Pink is Aloe...’

“Pardon me. Sir?”

‘…Pink is Aloe. Pink is… wait, what?’

Apparently as I sat there, trying to memorize a name, Rarity had been trying to get my attention from behind my little barrier.

“Terribly sorry, but would you mind letting me read that magazine. I’m afraid I’ve read all of the other ones. I come here a lot you see, so if you wouldn’t mind-”

“Here.” I did my best not to look at her. I was sure she wouldn’t want a surprise like running into me right that second.

“Oh, thank you so much, dear. I… oh.” She stopped dead. I only caught a glimpse her face. She looked mortified.

‘Shit… she saw me.’

Her little yellow friend took notice of her sudden silence. “Rarity is everything okay?” Her voice came little more than a whisper. She sounded fragile… dainty. “Oh, I’m so sorry. Is this your friend? I’m interrupting aren’t I?” She began to back away.

Rarity snapped out of her trance. “Fluttershy, dear, everything is fine. You’re not interrupting anything.”

“Oh, sorry. I just assumed… you were acting like you knew him. I must have been mistaken.”

“I-I’m afraid not, Fluttershy, dear.” Rarity shot me an apologetic glance. “W-we’ve only just met.”

I don’t mind that she lied. I mean I know she's sent a few clients my way, but she has a certain image to maintain, especially in front of her friends. I know that there's a difference between telling somepony something in confidence, and telling the whole town, especially considering the fact that I think one of her friends is Applejack. If it got out that she was seeing me... I don't even want to think about it.

Honestly, it doesn't bother me.

“Meester Guilty, Quake will see you now.” Aloe called from the counter.

“Welp, that’s me.” I hoofed the magazine over to Rarity as I stood up. “All yours. Nice meeting you two.” I smiled at the pair. Rarity managed a nod and a fake smile, and her friend just blushed. I gave them a quick goodbye and made my way to the masseuse’s room.

It’s a nice little room. A few shelves lined with sheets, a couple little desks covered in balms and creams and oils, and of course, there was a large cushioned table in the middle on the room, its surface made smooth from rubdown upon rubdown. In many ways it was similar to the bedroom in my cottage.

Quake was rubbing her hooves together and cracking her neck when I stepped in. She’s a big girl, not exactly muscle-bound just… thick… and large. She stands easily a full head above me. She's got a pale tan coat, a shoulder-length blonde mane. She’s actually quite attractive in a warrior princess sort of way.

She turned around as I stepped in. She had a look of pure business. “Pants off. Lie on table.”

I love the way she speaks; it’s very… direct. Her accent is also pretty interesting. I think she’s from the Frozen North.

I started wriggling out of my jeans. “How’s it going, Quake?”

She scoffed. “Same. Business good.”

“Yeah, for me too. What’s that stuff?” I pointed to her hooves, which were still vigorously coating themselves in some sort of lotion.

“Is new. Haysian. Called ‘tiger balm.’ Good for muscles.”

“Smells strong.” I noted as I climbed up onto the massage table.

“Yes.” She stated simply.

I laid myself down flat, and stuck my face through the… I don’t know what you call it. The face-hole-thing at the end of the massage bed. “You know, I’ve got this knot in my lower back that really… ooooooooooooh.” Bliss. Her heavy hooves quite suddenly began kneading away at my flesh.

“Relax. I fix.”

“Ooooooooooooh.” I felt so good in that moment when she first laid hooves on me. “Quake, marry me.” I was melting; the words just sort of dripped out my mouth. Massages really are something else. When you've got a masseuse or a masseur who really know what they're doing, there's nothing better.

“Heh. My husband will not be so short.” Her hooves worked deep and slow. The balm on her hooves began to heat up. It was a sort of... it's really hard to decribe... it was like a cold burn. She worked it deep into my coat and into my skin. It loosened up all my muscles.

“I’m not sh- ooooooooooooooh.” I tried to protest, but I my capacity to form words was quickly becoming impaired. If my eyes were opened they probably would've crossed. She started working my neck and shoulders, expertly locating all of my stress points. I keep a lot of stress in my shoulders.

“Shorter than me.” She laughed.

I tried to giggle, but it came out sort of slowly. “He… he… he… so’s everypony in town.”

“Hmmmmm, not everypony…”

My response was delayed. It was becoming very hard for my brain to turn absrtact concepts and ideas into words. “Who-? Oh… right… Big Macintosh.” Big Mac is a nice guy. I think he’s Applejack’s brother, but he either doesn’t know or doesn’t care how his sister thinks of me. He sells me apples like he would anypony. He’s a quiet guy, and fairly enormous.

“Mmmmmm, Big Macintosh… he’s sexy, yes?” Her voice became somewhat wistful, and she sigh breathily.

‘Great, just what I don’t want to think about.’

“I suppose… objectively… he’s certainly… attractive.” I was trying and failing to block unwanted images from my mind.

“Yes… and big.” If I had seen her eyes, I’m sure they would have been full of stars.

“Mmmmhmmmmm,” I absently agreed. She continued to wring all the stress out of my back, with intense kneading and pressing and squeezing. Minutes passed. My eyes rolled back in my head and I went limp. I felt like a wet noodle. Well most of me did. That much time and physical contact with a woman… hell, it was bound to happen.

“Uncomfortable?” She asked

What she was saying only barely registered. “Hmm?... mmhmm.” came my best attempt at a reply.

“Flip.” She instructed.

After much work on my part I managed to get onto my back. It was only then that I noticed my situation. My stallionhood was at full attention. “Oh hey…*huff*... look at that." My breath was coming in pants. I was getting fatigued just getting rubbed down. I suppose that's a sign of a good masseuse.

“Excited to be alone with mare?” Quake joked as she began to massage my chest lightly.

I chuckled. “I uh… *huff*... I usually charge... *huff*... for the privilege.”

She seemed to think i was joking, and laughed a little. “Oh? How much you charge, Guilty?”

“Twenty...*huff*... For an hour” She grabbed one of my forelegs and her hooves ran firmly down the limp appendage. Whenever one of her hooves met mine, it quickly found its way to my joint, and began again. It was like she was scraping all of the wear and tear out of me.

Her brow furrowed. “You are serious?”

I nodded, wincing at the glorious pain of my massage.

I sound like an M, don't I? I swear, this mare does things to me.

“You are whore?” She asked. It wasn't really an accusation, she just seemed surprised.

I cleared my throat. “I prefer escort, but… yes.” She trotted around me, and began work on my other foreleg.

“Hmmm…” She briefly ran her gaze up and down my body. “Too small for whore, no?” She was literally sizing me up.

I laughed aloud at that. “Do you mean me or my…”

“Both.” She brushed my cock with the back of her hoof, eliciting a gasp from me. “Ponies pay so much for this?”

“That and more.” I would've used my sexy not-quite-baritone, if I could've.

“Hmmm…” Quake shrugged, and for several more minutes continued to massage my front, carefully avoiding touching my stallionhood. She worked her magic over both of my hind legs as well.

Truth be told, I came very close to climax. She never even touched my naughty bits. If the massage gig ever falls through, this mare may have a future as an excellent escort. There's always a market for big girls, especially forceful ones. There's no shortage of submissive stallions in the world.

And this mare has something of a gift for giving orders. “Okay. Flip again. I finish back.”

I struggled to lay face down again. Eventually Quake just spun me herself, and finished up her massage. As she continued to work the knots in my muscles and absolutely obliterate my stress, my erection slowly subsided.

She continued in silence, and save for a few blissful ‘mmms’ and ‘oooohs,’ so did I.

“Done.” She eventually said. “Feel good?”

What she had done for me really couldn't be put into words. Still I gave it my best shot. “Oooooooooooohhhhh yeeeeeeaaaaaaah.” I sounded like I had just come. I was weightless. My shoulders and hips and legs and everything felt amazing… amazing and sore. “Oh my Celestia, I feel like a ragdoll right now.” I honestly thought I would collapse if I tried to get up.

She laughed jovially. “You sound like mare.”

“It seems appropriate. You are the stallion in our relationship.”

“HA! I like you Guilty. You make me laugh.”

I stretched and shifted on the table. “Geez… this must be what it feels like… well, what it feels like to be with me.”

Quake laughed at that too. “Little pony sounds confident.”

“I’ll have you know, quite a few mares have had more trouble walking than this after I was done with them.” My mind immediately jumped to Derpy. I could remember quite a few times when she had to lie down after a good session.

“Hmph… maybe you make up for size with... something else.” She was trying to size me up again. Her mind, surely abuzz with several possible lascivious acts bewtween her and myself.

“Well… maybe you can find out for yourself sometime, hmm?” I joked lewdly.

She grinned at me. “Maybe sometime." Her voice was so husky. "For now… go to desk, pay sisters. I have appointments.”

“Until next time, Quake. And maybe ‘next time’ will be at my cottage?” I offered suggestively. I was really hammering the point home; I might've overdone it, looking back. Oh well, I don't think I hurt my chances too much.

“All right, enough. Go. I must get ready.” I may be mistaken but I swear she was blushing a tiny bit.

I didn’t bump into Rarity or her friend on the way out. I just paid Aloe for my massage, grabbed my coat and made my way home.

I kept trying to plan out a session with Quake in my head. What music to put on, what kind of food to make, how to actually go about fucking that mountain of a mare, that sort of thing. Never too early to be prepared.

However, try as I might-

This hurts to even write down.

Quake… kept turning into Big Macintosh.

I just can’t get stallions out of my head. I wish I knew why I was thinking so much about it. It’s really starting to fuck with me.

The bitch of it, is that I planned a fucking amazing session.

Light acoustic guitar on the gramophone, something badlandsy. A dinner of something classic, like a veggie loaf, with a side of beans and some homemade applesauce. Hard cider to drink. We’d retire to the bedroom. I’d-

Whoa there! That’s about enough of that! I’ve got a fucking threesome to write about!

So uh… yeah… anyways…

When I got home I shook the snow out of my jacket and hung it up to dry. I had about an hour to get ready, but, honestly, there wasn’t much to do. The bed was made, I’d just dusted, the shower had been scrubbed down last week, I’d organized all my chests not long ago. The place was pristine. I did need to start a fire, though. I also needed to clean myself up. I’d been walking around in the wind and snow; my mane was a mess. A quick shower and shave took care of my appearance, and I was ready to go.

So, I lounged by the fire are browsed through an outdoor living catalogue while I awaited my appointment.

Now that I think about it I think about there might be some snowshoes in that catalogue.

I should order those.

Anywho, a while later there was a knock, and I hopped up to answer it. I gave myself a quick glance-over, and finding not a hair out of place I put on a dashing smile and opened my cottage door..

The snow had stopped by now, but the wind had really picked up. My eyes began to squint as the cold dry air blasted my face. I could scarcely make out two huddled forms on my doormat.

“Wooo! Inside, ladies.” I ushered the shivering ponies into the warmth of my foyer. Closing the door was actually kind of hard; it was pretty fucking windy. They shuffled inside, tracking in trails of snow. Their teeth were chattering, and their knees were knocking together. “You alright? It’s freezing out there.”

One of the ponies spoke up from under a padded hood. “Brrrrrrrr. What is Rainbow Dash thinking?” Her voice was somewhat tomcoltish.

“She said something about pushing a blizzard away,” said the other, in a somewhat mature cadence. “This is just as bad, though.”

The first pony nodded in agreement.

It seemed like they’d scarcely noticed me. Something I’m not very used to when it comes to a client. Still, it’s easy enough to remedy.

“I can take your coats.” I offered with a smile.

The two turned to face me.

“Thanks” said the first pony. Her magic lifted the coats off of the pair, and placed them onto my outstretched hoof.

With their hoods off, I could actually get a good look at the two. The first was a unicorn; she had a lovely… I want to call it cyan… coat, and striped, somewhat feathered, mane and tail. Her cutie mark was a harp of some kind. Even shivering, she was hot.

See what I did there?

I promptly hung the fluffy jackets and led both ponies to my table, where they each took a seat.

“Can I get either of you some tea… or cocoa maybe? Something warm?”

“I’m good,” the unicorn happily responded. Her companion just shook her head. This one was an earth pony; she had a lovely beige coat, and a rather vibrant mane of blue and pink. Her cutie mark was little candies in wrappers. She seemed a bit twitchy, clearly nervous.

“Well I’m just going to put a kettle on, real quick. If you change your minds, let me know.” I walked to the kitchen and began preparing myself some hot water.

Okay, now with couples, a session is, of course, drastically more complicated. Not only do you have to figure out what each mare wants from yourself, but also what they want from each other. Understanding the dynamic of a couple is crucial to process. As such, I like to take a moment to...

Well I won’t say eavesdrop but...

No I will say it. I eavesdrop on them.

As I slowly filled my little steel kettle, I watched and listened.

“You okay, Bonny?” said the unicorn.

The earth pony whined a response. “Why did I agree to this?” I could see her cradle her head in her hooves.

The unicorn scooted closer to her. “Becaaaauuse you love me. And becaaaauuse you promised. And becaaaauuse you’re at least a little curious.” The earth pony just groaned, and her companion wrapped a comforting hoof around her. “We can still go home.”

In response the earth pony sunk into the half-embrace of her minty companion. “No… I promised.” The two nuzzled affectionately.

‘Okay, that’s enough spying, Guilty.’ I returned to my guests, my hoofsteps, causing the two to quickly scoot out of their hug.

“Sorry about that.” I took my seat. “Anyways, I have a few questions before we start... if you don’t mind.”

The unicorn just gestured for me to continue.

“What should I call you? You don’t have to tell me your names, but I have to call you something.”

The couple exchanged a quick glance. “I’m Lyra,” replied the minty mare. “and this is Bon Bon.”

“Nice to meet you, Lyra and Bon Bon. I’m Guilty Pleasure.” Hunky smile. “Second question: We of course must discuss the matter of…” Fake nervousness. “… payment.” Pretending to get awkward seemed to make Bon Bon open up a bit; she began to smile.

“Oh Derpy told us all about it. Twenty an hour, right?”

‘Clients from Derpy? Interesting.’

“That’s right, and two of you makes for forty an hour.” More fake nervousness.

“Yeah I figured. I’ve got… hang on.” Her magic hummed, and a pouch of bits floated of her coat on the wall. “I’ve got a hundred and forty, that’s enough for four hours, right?”

Bon Bon facehooved. “Lyra… sometimes I wonder about you.”

“What?” asked Lyra, oblivious.

I chuckled. “Sorry, but that’ll get you three hours… with twenty bits to spare.”

“Oh.” She just looked angrily at her pouch and clicked her tongue. “Damnit.”

Bon Bon snickered. “It’s okay, sweety. I’ll do aaaaall of your math for you.”

“Sh-shut up! I can do math!” Lyra insisted.

They were very cute together; their antics were positively precious. They also gave me an idea. Lyra already seemed to have no problem warming up to me, but Bon Bon was still a bit stiff. She also seemed to enjoy teasing Lyra, which would be a quick way to establish a rapport.

So I would gang up on Lyra with her.

It would be tricky. If I took it too far, I’d not only offend Lyra, but I’d be in hot water with Bon Bon for poking fun at her girlfriend. It would take a light touch. I decided to start small, by allowing myself to laugh at Lyra’s expense.

I have a fairly good fake laugh, but I didn’t need it for this. It was actually pretty funny.

So I chuckled at Lyra, which seemed to make Bon Bon happy.

Lyra on the other hand seemed unamused. “Oh, you guys are dicks.” She began to count her extra bits out of the pouch. Once all her bits were out she slid the pouch across the table, with a frown.

I gave the pouch an exaggerated skeptical glance. “You sure you got that right?” I jabbed.

“You know what-?!” Lyra was determined to be upset, but was smiling despite herself. Bon Bon began to chuckle, and so, begrudgingly, did Lyra. I let the two of them have a good laugh before I asked my next question.

“Hehe, so anyways, next question: How did you hear about me?”

Bon Bon answered, after a long post-laugh sigh. “Oh, uh… our friend Derpy told us about you. We asked her why she was always busy on Sundays.”

“First time she’s sent clients my way. I wonder why it took so long to refer somepony to me.” I didn’t really need to say that. I was just thinking aloud, to be honest.

Lyra responded this time. “Oh this was a while ago. I’ve been trying to get Bonny to come visit you for ages.” Bon Bon looked somewhat ashamed.

“So what changed?” I asked the Earth Pony.

Lyra again. “My birthday was last week.”

“Ah, so this was your present, I take it?”

“You got it!”

Her enthusiasm made me grin. “So then, last question: What can I… do for you?” Seductive almost-baritone.

Bon Bon swallowed hard, and Lyra placed a comforting hoof on her shoulder. She cleared her throat and looked me dead in the eye. “I want you to fuck my girlfriend.” she explained.

I would’ve laughed at her delivery if Bon Bon hadn’t looked so grim. “That’s certainly doable. May I ask why?”

“Bonny’s… never had a stallion.” Lyra explained.

I furrowed my brow a little. “Okay… and she wants to try it ou-?”

“She wants me to try it.” Bon Bon interrupted, obviously not at all pleased with the situation.

“I see.” I turned to Lyra. “So you have had stallions, then?”

She nodded. “Yeah… up until Bonny I never really dated mares.”

“And up until Lyra, I… never dated.” Bon Bon admitted.

“So we were thinking-” Lyra began.

“She was thinking…” Bon Bon interupted.

“That Bon Bon really oughtta-” Lyra continued.

“I believe your words were ‘need to.’” Bon Bon deadpanned.

Lyra shot her a look. “-try out a stallion. Just in case she likes it.”

Bon Bon shook her head. “You make him sound like a sandwich.”

Lyra smirked. “What’s wrong with that? I bet he’s delicious.”

”Lyra…” Bon Bon frowned in disapproval.

“What? I’m just saying: I liked sandwiches... until I tried a taco.”

I couldn’t help but giggle at that one.

“For Luna’s sake, Lyra, have some decency.” chided Bon Bon.

At this point I butted in. “Okay, I think I understand the situation.” I was beginning to get a feel for the couple’s dynamic. Lyra obviously put more stock in sex than Bon Bon, who was seemingly more of a romantic. Lyra was clearly the top, and at least somewhat absent-minded. Given her cutie mark, she was probably a musician. If I had to guess, she didn’t care much for school.

I had some hunches about Bon Bon as well, but I needed more information.

“Lyra, if it’s not too much trouble, would you mind letting me speak with Bon Bon privately?” I asked.

“Uhh… I guess so.” She shrugged.

“Great, why don’t you-” The kettle began to whistle. “Why don’t you wait in the bedroom. It’s that door right behind me.”

“Okay, sure. Uhh… what should I do?” she asked, curiously.

This is always an issue with threesomes. Sometimes in order to get to know one pony, you have to ignore the other. When that time comes, you better make sure that other pony has something to entertain themselves. “You can poke around the chests in there, if you like. I’ve got all kinds of fun stuff to look at.” I directed my attention to Bon Bon. “Is that okay?”

Bon just shrugged, and turned her eyes table-word. Clearly without the safe presence of her lover, she wasn’t exactly ready to talk to me one on one. It was a bit of a gamble, but with any luck I’d be able to get her to open up. Lyra gave her mare a quick peck and trotted off to the bedroom. “Dude… this bed is HUGE!” She said as she closed the door behind her.

“Sorry, let me just get the kettle.” I quickly walked to the kitchen to quell the shrill whistle. “You sure you don’t want some cocoa or something?” I called back.

She reluctantly accepted. “I- *sigh* - I’ll have some cocoa.” It’s always a good sign to have a pony accept an offer. Even small things like cocoa show that a pony trusts you, if only just a little.

So I brought her a mug of cocoa. She thanked me and stared into her drink, as clients often do. So I took my seat once more, and took a nice long sip of the rich brew. The cocoa was much better than I was expecting; I have to remember to buy that brand again.

“So be honest with me Bon Bon.” She looked up at me half scared, unsure what to expect. “You’ve never really had any interest in stallions, correct?”

She nodded, though I didn’t really need to ask. It was fairly obvious.

“You don’t really want to be here do you?”

She twisted her mouth into a confused grimace and shrugged. “I don’t… not want to be here.”

I hadn’t been expecting that. I’d assumed that stallions simply put her off completely, but maybe there was a bit of morbid curiosity in the back of her mind somewhere. I needed more information. But first, I needed to make her feel more comfortable, so give her a chance to alleviate some of her stress. “So, Bon Bon, do you have any questions you’d like to ask me? I’ve been asking questions since you two got here.”

“I guess so.” She took a quick sip. “How exactly… does this work? How do I… do this?” She struggled give words to her thoughts.

I cleared my throat. “Well… that depends. How this works, and what I do, depends entirely on what you want, Bon Bon.” I scooted over to her a little bit. “We can go as fast, or a slow as you like. We can go as far as you like. We can do it where you like. We can do it when you like. We can do it how you like. And above all…” Comforting smile, and gentle hoof on top of hoof. “We can do it if you like. Nothing has to happen today, Bon Bon. There’s nothing wrong with taking your leftover bits and going home.” I removed my hoof from hers before it overstayed its welcome.

Bon Bon visibly loosened up. A sigh escaped her lips as a proverbial weight seemingly lifted itself from her shoulders. “That… that makes me feel better.” A smile crept onto her lips.

“Well, I’m glad. Any other questions?”

“… just one.” She looked pensive.

“And that is?”

“…Do you… do you want to… you know… have sex with me?” There was a sort of eagerness in her voice. No that’s not quite it. She was… hopeful. She wanted to be wanted. They always do.

Hunky smile. “If I were to tell you that I did not… I would be lying through my teeth. You’re sexy, Bon Bon. I would love to have sex with you.” I may have laid it on a little too thick, but she didn’t seem to mind; she smiled and blushed.

I do love making a mare blush.

“Now… I have one more question, if you don’t mind. And then we can join your lovely lady in the bedroom.”

She simply nodded.

“Do you know why your girlfriend is so insistent that you bed a stallion?”

She let out a pained sigh. “I don’t know. She gets these ideas and… there’s just no talking her out of something once she gets it in her head.” She was sneering, but it soon melted into a smile.

“You love that about her, don’t you?” Her happiness in turn made me grin.

She giggled merrily. “Yeah… I kinda do.” The way she looked at me right then, it was so full of… warmth. It was… it was a loving gaze. A truly loving gaze. But, it wasn’t really me she was looking at. Still… it was…

nice.

“So… shall we?” I offered.

“Yes.” She said with only a modicum of nervousness.

And with that, I led her to the bedroom. Now at this point, Lyra had only been alone for a few short minutes, which is why what I saw next sort of shocked me.

Vibrators and dildos strewn across the bed. Most of them clearly used. Smack in the middle of them was Lyra, spread-eagled, with a replacement stallion filling both of her holes. Each one thrusting away under the golden hue of her magic. Bon Bon and I each stared dumbly as the mare furiously rubbed her erect little nub with a hoof, tongue lolling out of her mouth, whole body shaking violently with orgasm, howling like a wolf, juices leaking onto the sheets.

I may have gotten an erection.

When the mare spoke, her words came as a drunken slur. “Bon Bon you haaaaave to try these!” The two toys slid out of the mare, and floated haphazardly over to Bon Bon. They were still glistening from use.

“I…I… I have no words.” Bon Bon continued to stare dumbstruck at the toys being held aloft before her.

I somehow managed not to burst out in laughter, and I somehow managed to get a few sensible words out of my mouth. “I see you managed to... occupy yourself.” My own pun was lost on me, but looking back it was a rather brilliant thing to say.

“*huff*…*huff*… Guilty!” called, Lyra. “Can I like… *huff*… buy those. They’re amazing.” She collapsed onto the bed. Her remaining words were muffled by sheets and clouds. “M fmml sm gmmd rmmmt nmm.”

Bon Bon was still staring at the vibrators. “I’m…I’m just gonna put these down.” She daintily picked them out of the air, and placed them on the ground. “Lyra… did you use… all of these?”

The mare in question flopped onto her back. “Not those.” She lazily indicated a tangle of small bullet vibrators on the edge of the bed. “Seriously, though… Bonny… *huff*… those two… *huff*… I need those.” Her body squirmed and her hooves found their way between her hind legs. “My pussy… *huff*… oh Celestia, my pussy…” As she lay panting, she began to pleasure herself once more.

Bon Bon sighed. “Lyra, you are, without a doubt, the horniest person I’ve ever met.”

“Yeah…*huff*… *huff*… and you love it.” Lyra’s hooves clopped away, lending soft, slippery noises to the air. The whole affair was dead sexy. I could already feel my jeans beginning to stretch. Bon Bon was feeling the same, if the slight twitching of her legs was any indication.

Lyra continued to stroke herself. With her nethers hidden behind her busy hooves, she brought herself to her second climax in as many minutes.

Well… at least that I saw.

“*huff*… *huff*… Okay… *huff*… bed’s… *huff*… all yours.” Lyra dragged herself off of the bed, and tumbled herself gently onto the floor.

Well… gently is a relative term.

Not to self: Consider getting a carpet. Hardwood floors and sexytimes clearly do not mix.

“Lyra!” Bon Bon yelled, as she rushed to her girlfriend’s side.

“I’m okay… *huff*… landed on… *huff*… my ass.” The two engaged in a nuzzle.

Bon Bon sighed with relief. “You big dummy.” She helped Lyra to her hooves.

“Aaaw, you love me.” Lyra began to nuzzle her lover with renewed, and somewhat obnoxious vigor.

“Aaah! Lyra! Cut it out! Geez… it’s like you’re drunk.” Bon Bon pushed the nuzzler away.

“Heeheehee… I feel a little drunk.” Lyra looked somewhat seriously at Bon Bon. “So… you gonna fuck ‘im?”

She took a deep breath. “Yeah… I am… for you.”

Lyra chuckled. “Awesome.”

And then Lyra swallowed. Lyra, who had been as gung ho about this as almost any mare I’ve ever seen, swallowed. She was dreading something. ‘What the fuck? What does she have to be nervous about? She’s not the one, who’s… losing her virginity, so to speak.‘

If I had caught any signs of apprehension earlier, I would’ve steered the whole session in a different direction. However, Bon Bon verbally agreeing to... do me had been a very big step for her. Taking it back now would do more harm than good. I was sort of committed at this point.

“Let me just, do one thing, and then we can start.” I said. I noticed that the chest with my potions was already open, so I quickly grabbed one and choked it down.

“What’s that?” inquired Bon Bon.

“Birth control potion.” Lyra and I answered in unison.

It’s not often that clients actually know what those are. I raised an eyebrow at the unicorn.

“I used to date a zebra.” she explained.

Fair enough.

“So, how should we… do this?” Bon Bon inquired.

“Well, would you like to… see me, first.” I gestured vaguely toward my lower half.

“Ummm… o-okay.” Her face was an awkward blend of curiosity and apprehension..

“OOH! I wanna see that too!” Lyra chimed in.

“Alright then,” I said, as I slipped out of my constraining pants. Free of its confines my erection dangled happily below me. I sat upon my bed and presented myself.

Now that I think about it I take that pose a lot. Whether I’m just showing off, or getting head, or a mare likes to be on top, I often find myself legs spread, cock in the air. It’s a very natural position for me.

“I thought it would be more… intimidating.” Bon Bon admitted.

“Derpy said it wasn’t too big.” Lyra gave me a testing prod, and grinned. “Nice and hard, though.”

I frowned. ‘Derpy said that?’

Well… it is true, to be fair.

Anyways, Bon Bon’s reaction to my dick was rather encouraging. She giggled and blushed, eventually she worked up the courage to touch it. She poked and tested it, before gripping it in her hoof. She started to stroke me, and I let out a satisfied moan. “Does that… feel good?” she asked.

“Mmmhmmm.” I hummed, letting my eyes close. Her hoofwork was clumsy, but pleasurable nonetheless.

“Go Bon Bon!” Lyra mock-cheered. “Pump that meat!”

I snorted in laughter. “Lyra, you are incorrigible.”

“Right?” voiced Bon Bon in agreement.

Lyra clicked her tongue. “Whatever… Get that thing inside you already, Bonny.”

Ever nervous, Bon Bon nodded. “So... should I just…” She trailed off as she rested her upper half on the bed. Her hind legs spread, and her tail lifted. Whether or not she’d been with a stallion before, she understood how to accept one.

As I took my place behind the mare, her lover climbed back onto the bed. She lay face to face with Bon Bon. “Don’t worry, Bonny. It’s no big deal.” There was that loving gaze again, on Lyra’s face this time. The two kissed passionately.

Now, here is a fun fact about threesome. If you are “manning the aft end” you don’t thrust suddenly. If I were to have started fucking right then, I’d have knocked their teeth together. Also, If another guy had been “occupying” her mouth, he might find some nice new teeth marks on his stallionhood.

So I waited patiently for the two to finish smooching.

I am such a gentlecolt.

Lyra looked up at me. “Go for it, dude.”

So go for it, I did. I brought myself to her entrance and I gently penetrated her.

She was as warm and wet as any mare who came to me. Not that it was any surprise. She wasn’t exactly tight, but that wasn’t really a surprise. I’m sure her and Lyra have toys twice my size. The sex was, well… uneventful. I fucked her gently. I slowly increased my pace. I fucked her quickly. She came. I came. There’s not much to be said for it. It may have been her first time with a stallion, but that doesn’t mean that it was amazing or wonderful or mind blowing. I’m sure she’s had better orgasms, and I know that I have.

Not that it was bad, for the record.

Sex is like pizza. When it’s good it’s really good; when it’s bad it’s still pretty good.

She never really got into it, though. She didn’t thrust to match my thrusts, she didn’t scream or pant or moan. She felt good, and I’m fairly sure she enjoyed herself, but she wasn’t really… invested in it.

Regardless, I performed my duty, as it were. After finishing, I removed myself from her as gently as I entered. Lyra was looking intently at Bon Bon. “Well?” she inquired. I hadn’t really had a proper view of Bon Bon’s face during the deed, so I climbed onto the bed alongside Lyra.

Bon Bon’s face was, as I had hoped, one of bliss. “Mmmmmmm. That felt good.”

Lyra swallowed again. “S-so you liked it?” So much hesitation in her voice.

Bon Bon grinned at her lover. “Mmhmm, it was nice.” She rubbed her snout against Lyra’s.

“Not better than me, right?!” Lyra blurted.

I literally rolled my eyes. It all made sense… her remark about liking sandwiches till she had a taco… saying that Bon Bon should try a stallion ‘in case’ she liked it. She wasn’t trying to broaden Bon Bon’s horizons. She was trying to make sure she didn’t prefer cock.

What a moron.

Bon Bon glared at Lyra with a look of pure business. “Lyra…” Her tone of voice was somehow even more serious than her look. “…the entire reason for this trip was that you wanted to make sure that I liked fucking you?”

There were several seconds before she uttered a response. “… Maybe!” It somehow sounded like an accusation.

Bon Bon huffed. “Lyra… you are… the stupidest mare-!”

“What?! Nu-uh!” She pointed a hoof at Bon Bon. “What about Pinkie Pi-?”

“Shut up a second,” the livid earth pony insisted. “First of all: I’ve told you I’ve only ever had an eye for mares. And second: It doesn’t matter if I like having sex with stallions, Lyra. I like having sex with you.” She bopped her in the horn, eliciting a small ouch. “You big dummy.”

“… You’re sure?” she asked.

“Oh just… come here.” Bon Bon climbed onto the bed and wrapped her hooves around her lover. A passionate kiss… and loving embrace... these two were in love. There was that warmth again. The same warmth that was in Bon Bon’s gaze. I can’t describe it. It sort of… emanated off of them. It made me…

Sad.

At the time, I didn’t understand it, but it’s obvious to me now. I was jealous. I was so very jealous of the two of them. I wanted what they had. I wanted somepony to hold like that. I wanted somepony to kiss like that. I wanted somepony to… to look at me like they looked at each other.

Listen to me… Close would say I sound like a faggot right now.

I needed to get out of the room. I needed a drink. This wasn’t any place for me right now.

“Ladies, something tells me you’d like a moment to yourselves?”

“MMHMMM!” Lyra hummed through her lover’s lips, as she rolled around the bed. (Which was still laden with erotic paraphernalia, by the way.)

I fought back a sob. “Well, should you need me I’ll be right outside.” I wasted no more time. I cantered out of the room, and left the two to their lovemaking.

I made a beeline for the kitchen. ‘Something strong. Something with whiskey. Manehattan? No, too complicated. Straight whiskey? Too simple, need a distraction. A Better than Sex? No, I don’t have any orange liqueur… or cream liqueur… or... fuck.. any hazelnut liqueur, either. Oh, I know… a boilermaker, easy, fun, perfect. Just what I need.’

I hastily prepared my beverage. I spilled a good amount of whiskey onto my counter trying to get it into a shot glass. I poured my beer into its mug so fast it was mostly head, but I didn’t really care. I took a deep breath, as I dropped the shot glass into the mug. With a clink and a splash, the dark whiskey mingled with the yellow beer… and then I chugged the fucking thing.

I felt tears as I choked down the bitter brew. As I reached the bottom of my mug, I realized that I had made it a tad too strong. In my haste I had used a rocks glass, instead of a shot. That didn’t stop me from finishing it, however; I polished off my cocktail and slammed the glass within a glass down onto my counter with a thud.

I began to breathe normally again. Now that I had had something to take the edge off, I had a new goal: clean myself up before my clients needed anything from me. Odds were that I had some time, but better safe than sorry. I went to the bathroom to get a look at myself.

I looked… fine. My eyes were a bit puffy and I had some tearstains on my coat, but nothing else. I don’t know why I was expecting to look so haggard. Maybe I felt haggard.

So I wiped my eyes, and put on some makeup to hide my redness.

…

Yes, I use makeup.

…

Only occasionally.

…

Anyways…

I cleaned myself up and I returned to my foyer. I made myself another drink, something a little more elaborate, a Manehattan. It was a good one too. My nerves began to settle, and I allowed myself to relax. I’ve had worse breakdowns truth be told. After my little tantrum I took a moment to take stock of how great my current situation was. My drink was good… the fire was warm… the music was calming… and I was getting paid to just sit there. Honestly, what did I have to cry about?

I thought about a few things while I sat there. I thought about stallions, unfortunately. I thought about mares, too. I thought about the stable. I thought about Crook. I thought about expanding upon my liquor cabinet. I thought about Sunny, and I thought about love.

I still miss her… sometimes.

As I sat and thought, I almost failed to notice a unicorn exit the bedroom.

Well, not ‘almost.’ She sort of barged out of the room, stumbling like a madmare. She panted as she half-jogged over to me. “Hey Guilty… *huff*… you got any like… *huff*… water? Cause I need like… *huff*… all the water.” She reeked of sweat and sex, a fragrance I’m quite fond of.

“There’s a pitcher in the fridge.” I offered.

“Awesome… *huff.*” She jogged over to the kitchen. I heard the fridge open and close. Lyra returned, water in magical tow, drinking the liquid in great gulps straight from the pitcher. She was so tired, but it was a good kind of tired. She managed to spill more than she drank onto her coat. “You wanna… *huff*… you wanna get your dick in there?” she asked with a tired grin.

I chuckled. “Is Bon Bon okay with that?”

She shook her head. “Not for her… *huff*… for me… *huff*… haven’t had cock in…*huff*… years.”

“Again, I ask. Is Bon Bon okay with that?”

She waved a hoof dismissively. “Yeah… *huff*… as long as she’s… *huff*… involved.”

That was all I needed to hear. I eagerly followed Lyra back into the bedroom. She made no attempts to conceal her soaking nethers from me. They were positively dripping.

When I entered I was also greeted with Bon Bon’s dripping nethers, as she lay spread-eagled on the bed, spent and satisfied.

“H-hey G-guilty.” Her entire frame was quivering. “Y-you gonna f-fuck Lyra?”

“Only if you don’t mind.” I explained. The Lyra and I joined her on the bed. “You two look tired, are you sure you don’t want a break?”

Lyra gave me a punch on the shoulder. “I look tired. All she’s been doing…* huff*… is cumming.”

“I… I f-feel too good to argue,” came a shaky reply.

“So how do you want to do this?” I inquired.

“You in my ass. *huff* My horn inside her. *huff* Fuck me into her.” She said very matter-of-factly.

It was a sound position

“You’ve thought about this.” It wasn’t a question.

Lyra laughed. “Maybe a lot.” Lyra assumed the postion. Oh her back, her horn inside her lover, her magic fondling her own marehood, she was the picture of insatiable lust.

I quickly fetched a condom. That’s a personal rule; I never go bare-back for anal. It’s a lot more… messy than porn would have one believe.

That said, it was very fun. Lyra’s back door was… how can I put this politely… accommodating, and made for a very comfortable fuck. Bon Bon came like mad, the tingle of magic can have that effect. I’ve never cared for it myself. Mid-way through Lyra grabbed one of the toys she was using earlier, and proceeded to fuck herself crazy.

I almost managed to end it in a simultaneous orgasm for all of us. I’m good, but I’m not that good. I don’t think Bon Bon managed to crest her final wave. Regardless, everypony was thoroughly satisfied.

Eventually the three of us ended up in the shower. Unfortunately, my shower only had two heads, but the mares were more than happy to share one. We talked and laughed. Lyra teased Bon Bon. I teased Lyra, much to Bon Bon’s amusement. At some point the conversation turned to current events.

“Oh hey, did you hear what happened in the library last week?” Lyra asked excitedly.

I froze. ‘Oh, fuck no.’

“Oh my goodness, YES! Gingerbread told me!” Bon Bon responded, equally enthusiastic.

‘Oh, FUCK no.’ Fuck small towns. Fuck gossip. Fuck all of it. By the sounds of it, it was the talk of the town. ‘How am I going to handle this? If it gets out that this was my fault…’ I shook myself out of my trance. I didn’t have time to ponder, I had to act nonchalant! Any non-guilty pony would be asking what happened.

“Did something happen?” I asked totally nonchalantly.

“Yeah. Okay so… do you know Twilight Sparkle?” asked Lyra.

I hesitated, trying to remember if I’d actually met Twilight outside of my session. “I’ve heard the name… is she the librarian?”

“Yeah, yeah. Well apparently last week her and her new boyfriend were fighting.”

“Who’s her boyfriend?” I was actually just curious about that.

“Some unicorn… I don’t know his name… anyways. The two of them were fighting, which I hear is not uncommon, by the way.” I gathered as much from Spike. “Apparently it was getting pretty heated, when suddenly…” ‘Here it comes.’ “… she hurled a book at him. Broke his nose.”

‘Wait, what?’

“I heard she only broke his glasses, but still…”

“… yeah… wow…” was all I could manage. I was relieved, to be sure, but also baffled. Twilight had attacked her boyfriend? Maybe that’s why it got so quiet when I yelled. Maybe it was just a coincidence. Maybe this would be a big enough deal that no one would care about me scaring a kid half to death. Maybe I’m in the clear.

Okay… that’s a pretty shitty way of thinking.

I still need to do something about that.

So, with that revelation we finished washing and adjourned downstairs. I made everyone a quick drink, for the road. I made myself another Manehattan. I made a Three Wise Mares for Lyra, who insisted on the strongest thing I could think of. (It’s really just three shots of whiskey, and I didn’t have the right kinds, but whatever.) Bon Bon asked for something light, so I made her a mixer of rum and sarsaparilla. I don’t know if that has a name. I agreed to sell Lyra one of the toys she was interested in, in exchange for her leftover twenty bits. The two mares thanked me. Lyra said they’d be back. Bon Bon said they might not. Lyra assured me we would. Bon Bon chastised Lyra. The two began bickering. I bid them goodnight, and they got up their coats and left… bickering all the way.

So there I was. A kitchen full of empty glasses. A bed covered in sweat and cum and soiled dildos. The smell of sex permeating my home, even over the burning smell of the fire. I wanted to deal with it in the morning.

Unfortunately for me, I have a client early tomorrow. I needed to clean it right away. So I scrubbed and rinsed and washed and dried and incensed and rearranged and reorganized and aired out and folded and made neat and made tidy and made presentable my home and everything in it. By the end of it I was… I’m running out of words for tired. I was famished- no that means hungry. I was… expended- no that doesn’t sound right.

I was tired. I was fucking tired. On the bright side, I was too tired to think about stallions. Too tired to worry and fret and stress about things I’d done, or things I’d thought about doing. All I wanted to do was write. I just wanted to go upstairs in my bedroom and put all my thoughts down on paper.

Even now, I’m…

Hang on… there was a knock at the door. Maybe somepony forgot something.

Hang on… I know that knock.

Oh my Celestia.

Crook is here.

Author's Notes:

So I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it was a blast to write.

Thank you to BlackSkulls for editing while my usual editor is swamped, I can't thank you enough.

As always, feel free to message or comment and let me know what you think, what you liked/disliked. Input is appreciated, and I LOVE talking to you all.

The next chapter might be a long one, so be patient.