An Island, Two Mares and a Bottle of Rum

Chapter Seven

Trouble Be A-Brewin'

***

"Pirates..." Vinyl whispered, licking her dry lips, and slowly turned her head towards Octavia, who just nodded, fear evident in her eyes.

"I know, Vinyl... " The cellist gulped. "It's terrible."

"Are you kidding?!" the DJ exclaimed suddenly. "It's awesome!" She threw her hoof in the air, a wide grin appearing on her face instantly.

"What?" Octavia blinked in lack of understanding.

"It's like, top-tier awesome!" Vinyl rubbed her chin. "No, wait, that would be space fire monkeys... All right, it's almost top-tier awesome!" she corrected herself. "Real pirates, Tavi! Sea-travelling, rum-drinking, on-adventure-going pirates!" The white mare giggled like a foal, covering her mouth with a hoof.

"Pony-hanging, to-sharks-feeding, with-sabre-cutting pirates," Octavia replied acidly.

"You're no fun, Tavi!" the white unicorn retorted. Suddenly, she squinted her eyes and moved closer to the grey mare, carefully inspecting her marefriend's flank.

"Vinyl!" Octavia blushed and covered her rump with her tail. "Is it really good time for flank-staring?"

"Nah, I was just thinking..." Vinyl rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "You know, you're always so prim and proper..."

"Yes?" The cellist huffed, crossing her hooves with dignity.

"So I was searching for the stick that somepony had obviously shoved up your rump. Or were you born with it?" The unicorn grinned. "I can't recall-"

"I WILL END YOU!" Octavia roared, leaping at the DJ, who was fortunately fast enough to avoid the deadly lunge and rolled aside. Vinyl giggled, and Octavia, losing her anger that was now replaced by a feeling of playful competition, readied another attack.

"Don't bother. I'm here to do it in your stead," a low masculine voice reached their ears from behind, making the two ponies jump to their hooves in surprise.

When they raised their heads, a terrifying view appeared before their eyes: before them was standing a huge - no, rather enormous brown stallion in a peculiar clothing, which consisted of some kind of black dress (at least the mares thought so) and a triangular cap on top of his head, which made his long, dirty red mane look even more frightening. His red beard was dirty and dishevelled. He grinned in a particularly evil manner, revealing a mouth full of golden teeth.

Octavia paled as her jaw fell open, and looked at her marefriend, who, for some reason, had begun trembling. Poor Vinyl... No wonder she's so afraid...

Vinyl began shaking uncontrollably, and just when Octavia extended her hoof to calm down the white pony, jumped up, a grin on her face lighting every corner of the island, if we disregard the fact that the island was, in fact, round. Either that or the ship had drawn nearer, so that the flashlight, which, in reality, was a torch, Octavia noted, was now lighting the whole island.

"It's so damn awesome! You're a real pirate!" Vinyl yelled, a look of genuine amazement visible in her eyes. "You even got a cap! Where's your parrot? You lost him when you were travelling the seas? Or should I say, 'when ye be trav'ling them seas, arr matey'?" Vinyl did her best pirate expression, taking the stranger by surprise, as he stepped back, concern evident in his once unperturbed look.

"Oooo, you even have golden teeth! They must have cost a fortune! Oh, no, you must have stolen the gold from a dead pony's chest hidden in a dead pony's cave concealed on top of a dead pony's volcano!" She continued, and would have been rambling on and on, were it not for the pirate, who, visibly tired from the fangasming unicorn, took out a large steel sabre, holding it in his telekinetic grip.

So he's a unicorn, Octavia thought dumbly, her body paralysed in the wake of the approaching danger. The sabre shimmered in the darkness like a tiny lightning bolt, finding its way to Vinyl's neck, stopping just a millimetre from it.

Octavia let out a loud shriek, trying to run to her marefriend, protect her at all costs, but her body didn't obey her.

Vinyl gulped and lifted a hoof solemnly. Octavia noticed that it was trembling; still, the white mare looked very serious and calm, on the outside.

"I demand Drunken Mercy!" the DJ announced, looking at the pirate directly.

What? Octavia blinked. Apparently, Vinyl had gone crazy. Well, sure, she was crazy already, but now it was a full trip to crazy-land on a broken locomotive.

"What do you know about Drunken Mercy?" the pirate demanded, however, lowering his sabre a little, visibly astonished.

"The Grand Pirate Codex, Chapter Five," Vinyl cleared her throated. "Any pony who is to be put to death by a pirate's hoof may demand Drunken Mercy on the grounds that they can win the Drinking Game. End of quote," the white unicorn concluded.

The pirate lowered his sabre completely, stroking his beard with a hoof. "Hmm..." He chuckled. "All right, young one, you know the law well! A Drinking Game it be, then!" he announced, stomping his hoof. Only now did the mares notice that he had a wooden hoof that surely didn't add a pleasant touch to the general impression. "Welcome to my ship, then!" He turned towards the large ship, eyeing it lovingly. "Ain't she a beauty!" He shook his head.

"Vinyl, what do you intend to do?" Octavia whispered into the white mare's ear.

The DJ grinned widely. "Easy, Tavi: win the Drinking Game. Out-drink the cap'n - and we're free! All thanks to The Codex!"

The cellist blinked in surprise. "Where do you know about this 'Codex' from?" she wondered.

"Remember when you told me to 'grow up' and stop watching The Pirates of the Coltribbean?" Vinyl asked, receiving a nod from her marefriend. "Well, turns out it is useful, after all."

"Come on, ladies!" the pirate roared, bringing the mares back to reality. "Or you be wanting to go feed them fish?"

"Now he's talking like a real pirate!" Vinyl eyed the stranger in awe. "He's, like, my hero from now on!"

Really, Vinyl? Octavia raised her brow, but the white pony had already begun following the pirate to the ship. She sighed and followed them, shaking her head.

Out-drink a pirate?! Octavia sighed.

We're sooo doomed...