An Island, Two Mares and a Bottle of Rum

Chapter Two

What Shall We Do With a Drunken Pony?

***

"What shall we do with a drunken sailor~" Octavia sang, her head light as a feather, the world around her bright and colourful.

"What shall we do with a drunken sailor~" Vinyl took up the melody, grabbing the grey mare by the waist and dragging her into a drunk dance, stepping on her hooves occasionally.

"What shall we do with a drunken sailor~" The cellist took another gulp of rum and waved her hoof with the bottle in it.

"Early in the morning~" both mares finished in unison, Octavia's voice hitting perfect pitch, despite her drunken state, while Vinyl ended on a rather plain, but more stable note.

Compelling to the laws of physics, Vinyl fell on top of Octavia, pinning her to the ground, grinning widely, hiccuping both in reality and her mind. I... *hic* love... *hic* Just as this idea began to form some kind of structure in her mind, her thinking process was interrupted by a sudden feeling in the area that naturally included her left ear. In particular, it was the feeling of a pony's teeth chewing on her ear.

Vinyl blushed hotly. While she would never admit it even to herself (at least when she was sober; which, now, she was not), she liked Octavia. Like... liked. More than she liked her friends. Maybe even more than she liked rum... No, that would be silly, Vinyl concluded. And now, as the grey mare kept nibbling on her ear, she could easily die from embarrassment.

Octavia was hungry. Very, very hungry. Moreover, she was drunk. Very, very drunk. She could barely understand what was happening around her, but right now all that mattered was something tasty in her mouth, something... ear?!

The cellist's eyes widened in realisation and she spat Vinyl's ear, spitting all around, trying to get rid of the taste by brushing her tongue with a hoof. Ew, gross! I just chewed on Vinyl's ear! She spat one last time and turned her head towards the white mare, who, for some reason (which may or may not have been connected with her being more than slightly inebriated), snapped out of her initial confusion and was now rolling on the sand, laughing, tears streaming from her eyes.

"You... *hic* pony...  eater, Tavi!" the DJ exclaimed, wiping a tear off her eye. Suddenly, Octavia found herself laughing as well, joining the white unicorn on the warm sand.

Vinyl's hoof reached the bottle and lifted it in the air. What the... Unfortunately, the rum was gone; and, with it, the last hope of safety and ultimate tranquillity, according to the DJ's drunken mind.

"No!" She rolled over and placed the empty bottle on the sand, kneeling over it. "Please... *hic* Dear God of Rum... *hic* Fill this bottle for... *hic* your sinful children of Equestria!" Vinyl raised her hooves in the air in a desperate, albeit drunken, prayer.

"Vinyl!" Octavia exclaimed, fighting laughter; needless to say, this attempt was in vain, for the battle had been lost before it even began. "Stop this blasphemy!" She decided to scold the unicorn some more, but a loud noise coming from her stomach interrupted her thoughtful tirade. "And get us some food!" she demanded, unable to take into consideration the fact that both of them were in no condition to get on their hooves and stand for five seconds without falling down, not to mention actually do anything that demands at least a little bit of coordination. I'm sooo hungry... Octavia mused with a deep sigh.

"I could make... *hic* tortoise soup, if you want..." Vinyl mumbled, falling on her back, her eyelids closing automatically.

"Turtle soup, Vinyl," the cellist corrected her friend, frowning. Please, don't tell me you don't know even that, Vinyl...

Vinyl groaned and tried to push the grey mare, her hoof planting directly into the hot sand. Ow. Missed 'er! "Who gives a buck?" she asked in what seemed to her a philosophical tone, but, in fact, was a blubbering slightly resembling normal pony speech.

"I do," Octavia retorted, her condition telling her that it wasn't time for arguing, but her conscious part immediately reminded her that it was always time to argue with Vinyl, given the opportunity. "You see, we're on an island, so there are only turtles here," she began, actually surprised to hear such complicated phrases coming from her mouth. Of course my mental ability was by no means hindered by a little bit... a couple of... half a bottle of rum!

"D'you wanna eat or not?" Vinyl asked, getting to her hooves, leaning against the ever so conveniently placed palm tree. Thanks, God of Rum, for putting this palm here! she directed her thoughts towards the sky, unsure whether the God of Rum lived in pony heaven or the Island of Coltba.

Octavia nodded with a frown, and that gesture sealed the deal. The two mares pondered for a moment, their minds capitulating before such a difficult task as turtle-catching.

"So... How do we do it?" the cellist wondered, getting up, immediately supporting her unsteady stance by leaning against the palm-tree-saviour.

Vinyl manoeuvred round the tree, taking small, but steady steps. Finally, her horn lit up and she snatched a branch, which disspated from the palm tree with an unpleasant crack. Her head embraced the pain with wide open hooves as she tried to direct her magic in another direction, while trying not to drop the branch.

"Tavi, could you... *hic!*" Damn you, hiccups! You drive me to embarrassment! "Gimme a hair of yours?" She staggered towards the mare, placing her front hooves on the grey back, balancing against the earth pony.

"What?!" Octavia exclaimed in shock. Of all the strange things Vinyl has ever come up with, this is probably the strangest... the grey pony thought and shifted, having no desire to part with even one of her precious hair. But then again, she did try to launch a hedgehog from a toaster...

"Come on, Tavi!" Vinyl tapped her hoof against Octavia's spine, eliciting an oof from the cellist. "I need it to make a... *hic* fishing rod!" she explained, gesticulating fervently, almost falling down.

Octavia pondered for a moment. Well, I am hungry, and we do need a fishing rod... She sighed and shut her eyes tight, jerking a single hair of hers, wincing from the pain, and handed it to Vinyl.

"Here, you destroyer of beauty," she grunted, rubbing her head.

"I prefer Filler of empty stomaches," Vintyl replied, working her magic.

Octavia sighed and closer her eyes. It was going to be a long, long day.