It was sunny because the sun was out, but Twilight didn't enjoy it because she was not outside; she was inside instead! Though the library was dark, she could still see because of candles. Twilight was reading, but she didn't have a book!

“Spike, fetch me My Book,” she said.

“Which book?” Spike asked.

“My Book!” Twilight bellowed back.

“Which book?!”

“MYYYY BOOOOooOOOOKKKKKK!!!!” Twilight said. Spike threw My Book at Twilight. “Thank you,” Twilight said. She read My Book and learned knowledge.

“I know things!” she said.

“What kinda things?” Spike asked.

“New things!” Twilight said, and then she trotted off because horses trot, even though she is a pony and not a horse. She left the library and went to Sugarcube Corner to have lunch, but the lunch was all gone.

“Pinkie has been eaten, Spike!” she said.

“OH NO!” Spike said. “Now who will throw my birthday party? It's tomorrow!”

“I don't know Spike.”

“WHO!” said Owlucousoihoais.

“OHM!” said Spike. Then they were physicists and told physics jokes.

“Princess Celestia will surely know,” Twilight told Zecora.

“Have you gone mad?! That mare is bad, my precious lad!” Zecora replied as she merrily pranced around the room.

“Hah hah,” Twilight said. “I laughed.” And then she went to Canterlot, which was full of rich sobs.

“Get out the way, rich sobs!” Twilight told them, but they were too busy being rich to listen, so Twilight teleported them into the shops.

“Thank you, Twilight!” the shop keeper said, and then he went away.

Twilight went sad. “I am sad,” she said. So she went inside the castle to found the princesses.

“Princess Celestia!” Twilight whispered. “Someone has eaten Pinkie pie... Why is your face all pink?

“On no. It is because you ate Pinkie Pie.”

“Yes, Twilight,” Celestia said. “I am cannibal.”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooO!!!!!11!!!!” Twilight shouted calmly. She was also purple but not blue.

“Wow!” Luna said in Surprise, who was surprised. “I'm also a cannibal! Whoda thunk it, yo.”

“Yo,” Celestia said, and then they danced.

Then Twilight flew high up into the air where Luna and Celestia could not get at her, because they are cannibals and cannibals cannot fly.

“Come down from there! You'll hurt Twilight, Twilight!” Celestia called up, but Luna was too busy dancing.

“Okay,” Twilight said, and fell down. Luna said “NO!” and tried to stop her, but she was too busy dancing.

“HAH HAH HAH” Celestia replied as Twilight landed on top of her. “You have fallen into my trap! I will send you to the moon!”

“I will go pack my things,” Twilight said, but she couldn't pack Spike because he was too little for the bag? How sad!

“You will have fun on the moon,” Rarity said with a smile. “There is cheese.”

“Rarity, moon is made of cheeeeeeeeeeese!” Rainbow Dash laughed.

“Why are you laughing at me?" Fluttershy said. “Don't laugh at me!” she told you. So you stopped, but not before you killed you for making Fluttershy cry! She is too sexy to cry. Then Spike was on fire.

“Spike, why are you on fire!? Get down from there!” Twilight asked.

“I'm not on fire! You, are!” Spike told her, and everyone agreed.

“Oh no!” Twilight said! “I must be going to the moon.”

“Yes,” Celestia said. “And I will eat all your friends while you're gone. And there's nothing you can do to stop me.”

“Luna'll do it!” Twilight said, but Luna was too busy dancing. “Luna, do not bust a move!” but she did.

“Goodbye Twilight!” all her friends said as she went to the moon. “Have lots of fun and don't forget to brush your teeth!” Celestia nodded.

“That's important,” she said, and started eating Applejack and no-pony cared except for Braeburn because he loved her like a cousin, not a lover. You are so gay, just like Braeburn, who is married to Cherry Jubilee (OTP FTW!)...

I'm no homophobe. I hear sounds just fine.

As Twilight walked to the moon, she took a few moments to quietly reflect on her sad fate. How would Ponyville survive without her being there to stop the cannibalistic princesses, when nopony but her knew of their dastardly plans? Worse, how was she going to cope with this, when the pony she had trusted the most in life had turned out to be... a monster.

“I am sad, and not happy because of sad,” Twilight said, shaking her head. She was on the moon and no longer purple, but grey, which in a horse means white.

“You can still help Twilight!”

“How?” Twilight said.

“Believe in yourself!”

“Okay,” Twilight said.

And then Twilight used the elements of harmony, which are not nickel or iron and so aren't magnetic.

“Oh no!” Celestia said. “Eating ponies is wrong! Why did no-one tell me, Luna?” But Luna was too busy dancing.

“I was too busy dancing!” Luna said, and then pirouetted away!

“And Twilight is now on moon! There's no air there! She will surely die!” Celestia said.

“And Pinkie's dead too!” Fluttershy said. “Now who will voice me?” She never spoke again.

“What shall we do?” Applejack asked?

“I don't know!” Zecora said, “But we can always use the elements of harmony!” And so they did.

“I can't believe that worked!” Fluttershy said, as Twilight left the moon. “We saved her good!”

“Yes.”

“Thank you,” Twilight said. “And now I will go learn things.” So she did.

“What sort of things?” Spike said as he scratched Celestia's head.

“Oh Spike, I told you! Knew things!”

And then everypony laughed at the pun.

The End.