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Story Poop

by Aquillo

Chapter 17: Poems in Poop

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Poems in Poop

And to our Lady Moon we spake,

And bid her, “From your death, awake.”

Piece reconstructed from papers seized during the Celestial Intervention, 98 MB. Most likely sourced from a Lunar cult, though given the assumption that Nightmare Moon was killed rather than banished, it is unlikely they were of significant size or import.


If harmony be naught to thee, know this:

There is a movement in the earth that stirs

With thy passing; a fury in the air

Torn up by thy presence. Thou canst not hide.

I see thee in the rivers made of foam.

I feel thee in the storms of chocolate rain.

I hear thee in the cries of harried foals.

And know this, too: There’s no place thou canst run.

For I will find thee. And I will end thee.

From Celestia and the Serpent by Wither Blue, 546 MB. After the 748 MB Manehatten riots following Sugar Puff the baker’s commissioned chocolate rain-shower as an advertisement for his new muffin recipe, it is customary to remind ponies before a reading that there is no accepted historical evidence of the tyrant “Discord”.


From one to another, another to one.

A mark of one’s destiny singled out alone, fulfilled.

From Starswirl the Bearded’s third personal diary, presumed lost until presented to Princess Twilight by Princess Celestia, 1005 MB. Analysis of the text reveals the final word to have been added after the Dissonant era, approximately late-Discordian.


Pick sticks up then set them down

In a circle on the ground.

Jump inside then sing aloud:

“Hide me so I won’t be found!”

From the Canterlot Archives of Rustic Poetry. Recovered from a pegasus village in the Foal Mountains by Starry Eyes, 560 MB. Most likely a spell preserved as a song for foals. Tested: known to work with all tribe members, the circle acting as a focus, though given the significantly less costly dual couplet-power of Starswirl’s Invisibility, it is not recommend as a suitable spell for unicorns.


Show me the maiden most fair to my eyes.

And then, whilst I’m watching, make her aroused.

Outlawed spell, circa 230 BB. Was effective enough to force a decreed syllabic change with the Equestrian language, breaking the rhyme and thus the spell.


When I sleep under the moonlight,

Shall she come, shall she come?

When I wake halfway past midnight,

Is it done, is it done?

Is it over, dearest sister?

Is thy banishment no more?

Are you even now returning?

Shall all be as was before?

Or are these not of thy making?

Are these visions thine, or yours?

Thy swift presence is too fleeting

For my heart to know for sure.

Still, I see you, in the nightmares:

Crowned in silver; wreathed in blood.

Twisting lips and mocking laughter:

Not one inch the mare I love.

Yet in visions washed like water,

I see thee in thy true form.

Always just a little further

Than I can reach 'fore the dawn.

And my days are growing bleaker

As I live just for the nights.

And as years pass, I grow weaker,

Sleeping more for just one sight.

I don’t want them. Take them from me.

Let me live without their weight.

Let me sleep without her presence,

Or don’t dare to let me wake.

Reconstructed from partially preserved texts from the west wing of Canterlot Castle, abandoned during the period of interregnum titled “The Celestial Withdrawal”. Best estimates made from analysis of similar items suggest a date as late as 23 MB.

Next Chapter: The Ferrets who wanted to be Otters Estimated time remaining: 7 Minutes
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