Whiterun's Defense

“So this is what a terrorized city looks like.” Spike said as he and Haldor stood in the center of Whiterun’s market area. Around them citizens and guards alike ran in unorganized circles while screaming bloody murder at the sky.

“Yeah, but I'm surprised no one is trying to make a sacrifice to the pony in return for their safety.” Haldor grinned at the thought.

“Take my son! He’s to ugly to get me grand-kids!!” A old lady ran by holding a fully grown man in her arms, whom was crying like a little baby.

“Dude that's just wrong.” Spike said with a small shake of his head. Then suddenly him and Haldor both broke out in uncontrollable laughter at the sight, causing many panicking citizens to pause and stare at the them for a few seconds before they continued screaming. After good minute of laughter, the pair manged to catch their breath but were still slightly chuckling.

“Is it bad that we are actually laughing in a situation like this?” Haldor asked spike with a slight frown on his face.

“Nah, man. We’re probably going to get massacred anyways, why not spend our last minutes enjoying life?” Spike turned to a stack of barrels full of mead, “In fact I’ll be over there if you need me..”

With that, the small purple dragon walked over to the barrels and dunked his head inside the nearest one. Haldor rolled his eyes and turned back to the situation at hand. Some of the guards that were not panicking had bows and were attempting to shoot at the yellow flying pony above them. There were a few mages running around, but were shooting random fireballs that mostly hit people’s houses. Also there two people having sex next to a big tree, but that doesn't matter.

“Oh , we’re screwed.” Haldor muttered to himself. Suddenly the giant pony swooped down and landed on top of the brandy barrels, sending the spike and splinters of wood flying everywhere. At once everyone froze and stared at the yellow pony with open mouths, even the two lovebirds stopped and stared. Haldor finally got a good look at the pony, it was twice as big as a bear with a yellow coat and pink mane. On its flank was three pink butterflies, which was a little weird for a evil man eating beast.

Then she began to talk in a soft voice, “Um hi every-...thing, My name is Fluttershy.”  

Everyone stared at her.

“I’m sorry if I scared all of you.”

More blank stares.

“I was hoping we could become friends.. if that's ok with you...”

It was silent for a few seconds, everyone just stood there starring at the large yellow pony until finally a man stepped out of the crowd.

“Yes, let us befriend this nice pony! Who’s with me?” He shouted to the crowd. There was a pause and then everyone began cheering their agreement outloud, some helms were even thrown into the air. (They all knocked out the people they landed on)

“STOP!!!” Spike screamed out loud, causing the crowd to stop cheering and look at him.

“This pony is evil! Just look at what it did to these poor barrels of ale!!” He pointed at the shattered remains of the barrels.

The crowd looked at the pile of wood pieces, then at spike, and finally Fluttershy.

“He’s right! She destroyed good ale!!” A few people murmured there agreement with the random man.

“Well,” Fluttershy began, “Beer is bad for you..”

There was a large gasp from the crowd, some people even began to cry. Things quickly changed as the crowd began to become hostile, and started advancing at the pony.

“How dare you insult the one thing the Nord race is based on, other than war and really big axes!” One man shouted. “Now leave before you hurt us even more!”

Fluttershy’s eye began to twitch, her mane started to mane started to pop up and stick out at random points. Oh Talios, this is gonna get bad..  Haldor thought while watching from the back of the crowd.

Spike raised his middle finger, “Hey Fluttershy! Fu-”

“FUS RO DA!”  In less than three seconds Spike ended up inside a house that proceeded to collapse on him and burst into flames. And once again, everyone one stopped and stared at Fluttershy with their mouths agape.

“YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE ME!!!!!!!” Fluttershy screamed while lighting and flames conveniently appeared behind her. And once again everyone began to panic and scream while running around in almost perfect circles.

In the middle of this horrible crisis Haldor couldn’t help to face-palm himself, quickly he ran over to one of the panicing guards and grabbed a gaint two headed war axe that was dropped on the ground. He looked over at Fluttershy, who was eatting a elf, and began sprinting at her with the axe raised above his head. At the last second she looked up to see the axe cutting through her neck, severing her head from her body.

For a third time everyone stopped and stared, this time at Haldor, with there mouths agape. Before he could say something really corny, Fluttershy’s dead body burst into flames and was completely burned to ashes in mere seconds. Then the flames arched out and flew right into Haldor, who’s body seemed to suck up the flames like a sponge.

Haldor blinked, What the heck just happened?.

“He’s ponyborn, just like in the legends!” Someone shouted from inside the crowd, then at once everyone began cheering and throwing more helms into the air. Haldor had no idea what was going on, but before he could ask anyone a deep rumbling noise appeared out of no where.

“What is it?” Someone yelled.

“It’s 50 cent!”

“Na, man this sounds more like dubstep.”

The rumbling went on for a few seconds until it finally stopped, just as suddenly as it had begun. Spike some how manged to crawl out from the burning rubble and walked up to him.

“So are you going to go meet them?” He asked as he pulled out flaming spplinters.

“Meet who?” Haldor asked with a puzzled exspresion.

“Didn’t you hear their message? They said ‘Ponyborn we require thou to travel to thee at the throat of the world, we will train thous so thou fun shall be doubled!’ and that was pretty much it.”

“All I heard was some rumbling like a giant was taking a dump.” Haldor said with a chuckle.

“I guess you don’t have my awesome skill.” Spike started flexing trying to show off his small muscles.

(Note: I have no idea where I'm going with this, but that's what makes it fun!!)