*Knock* *Knock* *Knock*

Three knocks sound out, and the lone occupant of the house zooms toward the front door.

Mom, dad, thank you both so much for not buying a cloud house.

The grey pegasus bolts downstairs, turns right, and sprints to the front door. He nearly slams face-first into it, and fumbles madly with the lock. After too many seconds, it's open.

An earth pony in his late teens is standing there, in the drizzle. Burnt caramel coat. Floppy blond mane sitting damp across his face. Those sweet blue eyes, that silly, sheepish grin. It's Lickety split, the pegasus's coltfriend.

My coltfriend. I have a coltfriend!

"Hey, Rumble. Can I come in?" There's an adorable flutter in his voice.

"Step right in to the palace of love, Lickey!"

Lickety steps inside, and as he's through the door Rumble darts in close and presses his lips against his. The kiss is short and chaste. Lickety's lips are damp with rain but so warm and so soft. His eyes are still closed when they break the kiss. Both of their hearts are thumping in their chests.

They've been going out for two weeks, since Diamond Tiara's party. They're in the final year of high school, and it's their first real relationship. Every kiss still feels like that.

They close the door, and then quickly head upstairs. Rumble opens the door to the bedroom. It's a spacious room, with a double bed and a desk. There are posters all over the walls and ceiling, of bands, atheletes and models. Clothes, books and graphic novels are scattered haphazardly on the floor.

"Wow. This is your room?"

Rumble grins. "Nah, it's Thunderlane's. He's got a double bed."

Lickety raises his eyebrows. "And he's okay with this?"

"What big bro don't know won't hurt him."

"Sneaky." Lickety kisses Rumble, catching him off guard. Rumble's eyes go wide, then slowly close as he sinks into the kiss. Lickety is strangely forceful, and pushes into him. Before he knows it, Rumble is suddenly pushed out of the bedroom door.

"Wha?"

Lickety cuts him off. "Wait there until I say. I've got a surprise for you," he says, tapping his saddle bag. With a wink, he closes the bedroom door, leaving Rumble outside.

Rumble blinks a few times, trying to figure out what just happened. A surprise? What kind of surprise? Beer? Chocolate? Haybacon? Or.. or is it going to be a sexy surprise? Is he going to let me eat haybacon off his flanks? I'd like that. I hope it's a sexy surprise.

A minute later, Lickety's voice brings him out of his thoughts. "Come in, I'm ready!" Rumble opens the door and steps inside. The sight stops him in his tracks.

Lickety is laid on his front on the bed, facing away from the door. He's wearing a pair of white cotton panties over his shapely, chocolate-brown flanks. There are knee-length, white cotton socks on his crossed hind legs. The back of his straw-coloured mane is pulled into two cute pigtails, and the front is swept over one eye. He's looking over his shoulder at a stunned Rumble, with an innocent expression on his face.

Rumble swallows, his words caught in his throat. "Uh... you look..."

"Close the door," says Lickety, almost whispering. "And come here."

Rumble does as he's told, and silently makes his way to the bed. His heart is pounding in his chest, and his legs feel like they're not quite his own. He puts a leg on the bed.

"Stop," orders Lickety. Rumble is still. Lickety parts his hind legs slightly. "Kiss my back hoof," says Lickety, breathily. "Then work your way up."

Rumble nods wordlessly, then shifts along the bed to Lickety's back legs. He takes Lickety's left hoof between his front hooves. Then he leans forward, and plants a kiss on the bottom. The cotton sock is soft against his lips. Lickety relaxes into the sheets. Rumble kisses the hoof again. He moves up and kisses Lickety's calf. He goes further and kisses his way up the leg. He reaches Lickety's inner thigh, and finds his face inches away from his coltfriend's panty-clad flanks.

Oh Celestia, something about that butt is just...

It's not hardened from constant exercise or flabby from too little. It's soft, round and just right, a perfect peach of a butt. Rumble swallows, then inches forward and grazes his muzzle over the chocolate curves. He can smell a hint of aftershave, mixed with clean, fresh sweat. His eyes glaze over.

Rumble buries his face between his coltfriend's flanks. He nuzzles Lickety's balls through the soft cotton, nips at the side of the cheeks, rubs his face from side to side and massages Lickety's flanks with his hooves. His coltfriend's flanks are very clean, but there's a wonderfully musky smell. He inhales deeply. Lickety sighs with pleasure.

Rumble reluctantly lifts his face from the flanks, and kisses his way up his brown-coated boyfriend once more. He moves faster this time, planting kisses one after the other, dragging his tongue across Lickety's ice-cream cutie mark. He kisses up Lickety's barrel, up his back, up to his withers. Lickety makes little noises of contentment as Rumble kisses his back. When Rumble reaches Lickety's neck, he gently bites and sucks on the side. Lickety rolls over onto his back, and pulls Rumble into a deep kiss.

Despite being on the bottom, Lickety is full of passionate intensity. He runs his hooves through Rumble's dark grey mane and slips his tongue in his mouth. Their tongues move with and against each other. Rumble tastes toothpaste and bittersweet cocoa in his boyfriend's mouth. He breaks the kiss, dragging his teeth over Lickety's bottom lip as he does. Lickety slips down and starts kissing and nipping at Rumble's neck.

The two lovers mash their chests and bellies together. Rumble's cock is achingly stiff, and he can feel Lickety's hot and equally hard erection rubbing against his. The thought of it alone makes his cock throb. The actual sensation, the heat coming from his boyfriend's dick makes him grind his hips into Lickety's crotch. Lickety's balls are straining against the cotton panties, and half of his erection is poking out of the top. They grope at each other, clumsy and fumbling, just trying to feel each other everywhere, almost as if to make sure they're both really there.

Lickety brings a hoof down on Rumble's thundercloud cutie mark, and flips his boyfriend onto his back. He plants a kiss on Rumble's lips, soft and short, and then looks into his eyes.

"Rumble," he says, his voice almost a whisper. "I want to suck your cock."

Rumble swallows and looks at his boyfriend, mouth slightly open. I'm going to get a blowjob! My first blowjob! This is- Wait, he wants a reply. Say something. Say something!

"Uhhh..." Rumble pauses and swallows again, his mouth oddly dry. "Yes! Uh, please."

Lickety smiles upward at him, and starts to kiss his way down his body. Rumble strokes one of Lickety's ears with a hoof, making the earth pony giggle. Lickety reaches his boyfriend's ribs, and keeps kissing downwards, nuzzling the soft, grey fur on his belly. His chin touches the top of Rumble's cock, and he cradles it in both hooves. It's six inches long, jet black, and burningly hot. He looks up at Rumble's eyes, and plants a soft kiss on the head.

Rumble lets out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.

Lickety's bright blue eyes never leave Rumble's as he kisses his way down the shaft. He pushes his hind legs up, showing off his shapely flanks to his boyfriend. The white filly's panties are tight against his balls and shaft, and they force him to keep his tail high in the air. It makes him feel like a slut. He's Rumble's slut.

Rumble groans as Lickety laps at the base of his cock. Lickety goes down further and starts licking his balls sloppily, then sucking one in his mouth. Rumble's mind almost melts; it's like sinking crotch-first into a hot bath. Lickety opens his mouth wide, trying to take Rumble's entire sack in his mouth at once. He succeeds, and Rumble giggles at the sight of Lickety's cheeks bulging cutely.

Lickety lets the balls out of his mouth and starts licking his way up the cock, drooling all over it. He rubs a hoof over Rumble's balls and into his taint as he does. When he reaches the top, he sucks the head into his mouth.

Oh fuck. This is it. He's sucking my cock. I'm looking at the cutest colt in Ponyville, and my cock is in his mouth. It feels...

It doesn't feel like pure ectasy. No surges of pleasure course through his body like lightning. His world doesn't explode into a shimmering kaleidoscope of lust.

It just feels, well, good. Pleasant. Lickety's mouth is warm and his tongue is gentle. It feels nice. Like he could stay here all day.

Lickety tries to take the cock deeper in his mouth, but it's too thick. He only manages two and a half inches. Rumble doesn't mind. He splays his wings out, getting more comfortable, and tenderly runs a hoof through Lickety's blond mane.

Lickety makes up for his inexperience with enthusiasm. He takes it as deep as he comfortably can and drools all over it, getting it slick with saliva. He moans with hunger and lust as he sucks and licks, and makes happy sounds when Rumble lets out a contented sigh.

A few minutes later, Lickety sucks right to Rumble's tip, letting go with a 'pop.' He plants a little kiss on the side of Rumble's length, and then looks up at him.

He brushes his mane from his eyes, and whispers, "Rumble, can we do it? Tonight?"

"Like, sex?"

"Yeah."

Rumble grins. It's the cocky athelete's grin that Lickety loves. "Sure."

Lickety beams at him. "How do you wanna do it?"

"Stand up and turn around." Lickety does so, turning his flank towards Rumble. "Now put your chest and head down on the sheets, with your butt sticking up."

"Like this?"

Rumble's eyes glaze over, and he nods at the sight. "Uh-huh..." He takes a moment to admire his boyfriend's arse. Two perfect globes, the color of milk chocolate and wonderfully soft, framed by filly's panties. Then he runs a hoof along Lickety's back leg, along the soft cotton of the socks, and gives the rump a smack just to see it jiggle.

Rumble leans in close to the base of Lickety's tail, which swishes over his face and makes his ears twitch. He nips forward and takes the top of the white panties between his teeth. He slowly pulls them down Lickety's legs, revealing his prize. He can see everything. Lickety's mottled pink balls, his stiff shaft swinging undernearth, and his tight little butthole.

"Uh, Lickey?" he says, unsure of how to word the question. "How clean are you back here?"

Lickety cranes his neck to look back at his boyfriend. "Don't worry, I had a long shower, and, eh..." He stops and giggles nervously. "...I borrowed a donut syringe from work, so I'm as clean as I can get. I feel pretty guilty, I had to throw it out afterwards."

Good enough for me.

Rumble inches forward, and touches his tongue to Lickety's asshole. It tastes of nothing, just skin and sweat. He flicks his tongue over it a few times, and gets it wet with saliva. Then he pushes his tongue into the tight little hole. Lickety bites his bottom lip and coos with delight. The sound spurs Rumble on, and he massages Lickety's cutie mark as he licks his ass. A minute later, he pulls away.

"Um, Rumble, I didn't bring any lube..."

He flashes that grin again. "Don't worry Lickey, I took care of it."

Rumble nips off the bed and picks up a small plastic bottle he'd left by the bedside table. It's a bottle of personal lubricant. He'd asked Pokey Pierce for advice yesterday, and he'd reccomended this brand and told him to use lots. Rumble gets back on the bed, pops the top off the bottle, and slathers a generous amount over his cock, spreading it with his hooves. He squirts a little onto Lickety's butthole, making him shiver at the sensation, then pushes the nozzle into his ass and squeezes in about half the bottle.

Rumble puts the bottle to the side, and then puts his front hooves on Lickety's back. He uses a hoof to guide his cock onto his coltfriend's anus.

"You ready?" he asks.

"Yeah." Lickety's voice is a whisper, "Be gentle." Lickety cranes his neck and Rumble nips down to kiss him.

The pegasus slowly starts to sink his length into Lickety's butt. It's incredibly tight, and warm and soft. Two inches in, Lickety gasps sharply.

"Ahh, stop!"

Rumble freezes, his stomach turns to ice. "Shit, you okay?!"

"Yeah, sorry, just give me a second." Lickety wiggles around underneath him for a moment. "There, go ahead. Just be slow."

Rumble cautiously pushes into him. Lickety lets out a slow, high-pitched moan as he bottoms out.

He's completely inside Lickety. Lickety's anus is squeezing the base of his cock, and the rest is in a warm, comfortable void. Rumble nuzzles the back of his mane as he sighs happily. The pegasus pulls out Lickety's hairbands so he can rub that delicious blond mane across his face. He kisses the back of his neck and nips at the earth pony's ears. Lickety giggles, and pushes his rump back against Rumble's cock.

They start to fuck. Rumble pulls out slowly, until only half his length is inside, and then slides back in. "You're so soft and sweet, Lickey. You want it badly, you little slut."

Lickety grinds back into his hips. "Mmmm, I'm your little filly."

Neither of them say anything for a moment. Then they both burst out laughing at the corniness of their sexy talk.

"Mare, we'd so be fired if we were pornstars," says Rumble.

"Hee, yeah." He twists for another kiss. "Now fuck me, you sexy, sexy studmuffin!"

Rumble is happy to comply, and quickly gets into a good rythym. He slips a lubed-up hoof under Lickety and starts clopping him off. Lickety moans and slams his rump backwards into him. Their fucking becomes fast and fluid, made easy by the slick lube. Rumble changes the angle a little, and Lickety starts moaning incoherently.

"You close, baby?"

Lickety just nods and bites into the pillow. Rumble pulls the back of his mane with his teeth, and keeps fucking at the exact same pace. One of Lickety's front hooves comes down on top of Rumble's. Both of them stroke up and down Lickety's cock at the same time.

Lickety's moans get higher in pitch. "I'm gonna oh I'm gonna!" With a throaty groan he shoots his load into the sheets. Rumble keeps on fucking and stroking, though more gentle. The earth colt keeps spurting, and his cock keeps twitching even as the spurts stop. His back legs collapse, and he lays down on his belly.

Rumble is about to speak, then Lickety says, "Keep going, Rumby. Finish inside me. Fill me up."

Rumble starts fucking him again, with long, slow strokes. He pulls out until just the tip is inside, then buries the whole thing inside him. Lickety moans ever so softly. Five minutes later the thrusts become shorter and uncoordinated. Rumble squeezes his eyes shut and comes. His whole body siezes up as he shoots his seed into Lickety.

They lie there together for a while, comfortable, silent. Rumble snuggles close against his lover, sharing the warmth and softness. Both of them just lost their virginity.

"Rumble, that - that was..."

"It sure was, Lickey."

It's ten minutes before either of them think of moving. Rumble is first to speak.

"You wanna go clean up, babe?"

Lickety turns and kisses him on the lips, short and sweet. "I'd love to."

Rumble pulls out of him, and then Lickety stands up and stretches. That's when Rumble sees something very bad.

Lube.

Filthy, frothy lube, mixed with semen.

Filthy frothy lube, mixed with semen, squirting out of Lickety Split's anus like Discord's water pistol!

"Gah! Lickety - butthole! Lube! Stop!"

"Wait, what?" Lickety turns around in a circle, trying to see the problem. The foul mess goes all over the sheets, and spurts onto the limited edition autographed poster of Fluttershy at the head of Thunderlane's bed. Lickety sees the mess, and starts to freak out.

"EWWWW! Rumble what the hay! What do I do what do I do?!"

"Clench! Clench!"

"I'm clenching!"

"IT'S NOT WORKING!"

The flow hasn't stopped, and somehow clenching seems to make it worse. It just comes out at a higher pressure, spraying vileness across the bed, over Thunderlane's alarm clock, the carpet, his The Immortal Game graphic novels, and other items that were previously unlubricated.

"Rumble, quick, plug it!" cries Lickety.

"With what?"

"With you!"

Rumble gets the hint and hastily mounts Lickety. It takes several awkward and intensely humiliating seconds, but he manages to stuff his softening penis back inside.

Oh mother of Celestia, Thunderlane is going to kill me. They'll never find the body. There won't be a body to find.

Lickety's voice snaps him out of his thoughts. He sounds testy. "Rumby, how much lube did you use?"

"Dunno, like, most of the bottle?"

"How much was in it at the start?" There's a definite edge to his voice now.

"It was new, a ten ounce bottle."

Lickety's eye twitches. "Those things are meant to last two months, Rumble!" he yells.

"Well I didn't know, did I? Pokey just said use a lot, he didn't warn me about turning my boyfriend into a fucking sewage cannon!" he snaps, instantly feeling bad about it. "Sorry for snapping."

Lickety relaxes, and gives a little smile. "Okay. Don't worry, it's going to be fine. We'll get everything fixed, we just need to clean up, and then, well, clean up. We just need to get to the bathroom."

"It's downstairs."

"Wonderful." Lickety sags.

"It's no problem, we'll just walk downstairs together and clean up. The house is empty, big bro is at Flitter's and my parents are at a poker night with Sweetie Belle's parents."

With some creative shuffling, they both waddle off the bed, Rumble still balls-deep inside of Lickety. They start walking very gingerly out of the room together, Rumble standing on two hooves and keeping the other two on the small of Lickety's back. It takes a full minute to reach the top of the stairs.

Getting down the stairs is slow and terrifying. Rumble flutters his wings to stay stable and avoid putting too much weight on Lickety. A single false step will send them into painful cartwheels of agony and filth. Three steps from the bottom, Lickety stops.

"You okay, Lickey?"

Rumble notices an oddly green tint to Lickety's cheeks. "I can't - the smell, I'm gonna..."

"You're gonna what?" Oh. OH! Oh no! No no no! "Wait, Lickety don't throw up please don't if you throw up-"

There's a soft, wet noise. On second-from-bottom step is a small patch of sick.

It might be okay, the smell might not be that bad-

The smell hits Rumble. There is a second soft, wet noise.

"...I'm so sorry Lickey," croaks rumble. He sounds on the edge of tears."

"Rumble."

"..."

"You threw up on my back."

"..."

"It's in my tail."

"We - we should get to the bathroom."

"Yeah."

They reach the bottom of the stairs, looking rather worse for wear, but the worst is over. They're in the hallway. A meter away is the door to the sitting room. To the left is the kitchen, and to the right, next to the front door, is the main bathroom. The floor underneath them is hardwood, easy to wipe clean.

That's when they hear the most terrible sound.

The sound of a key in the front door.