The Twilight Prince: Redux
Chapter 2: Chapter 1: An Inauspicious Letter
Previous Chapter Next ChapterDear Twilight Sparkle,
It deeply saddens me that what your request is something I cannot ever grant. The spell that you request does not exist, not even in my private library. Even if it did, I would not give you access to it.
As I have taught you, magic is dangerous. And some magic is more dangerous than others. Entire fields of magic have been deemed as 'Dark' due to how their very use warps and twists their caster, yet more have been deemed 'Grey' for fear of how they could be misused. I am not exaggerating when I state that – despite 'only' falling into the latter category – the spell that you have requested is the most dangerous that I have ever had the misfortune to encounter. That very spell has represented an existential threat to ponykind in the past and would do so again if it were recreated.
As you may know, historically, daughters were viewed as preferable to sons. This was for a variety of reasons, almost all of which unfounded. Unfortunately – early in my sister's and my reign – this preference led our little ponies into doing something very foolish.
They hired mages to change their sons into daughters.
I ask you to remember Clover's Third Law of Thaumaturgy: 'All magic – unless deliberately designed to be temporary – is permanent'. For spells cast upon a living thing – including ponies – 'permanent' is often not limited to the individual, rather becoming heritable to a certain degree. Thus a spell used to turn a stallion into a mare – or a colt into a filly, as was usually the case – will cause the resulting mare – and those descended from her – to be less likely to birth – or sire, in the case of a male descendant – a colt. More importantly, the effect from multiple ancestors affected by such a spell are cumulative.
Unfortunately, both Luna and myself were both very young and naive and we did not recognize the perils of this practice until it was almost too late.
As a result, we had every single example of such a spell expunged from all spellbooks and made both the casting and creation of such a spell incredibly illegal.
Even still, it was only with great difficulty and great suffering that the end of ponykind was adverted. And even with that, the scars still linger; to this day far fewer colts are born than should be.
I hope I do not need to explicitly state that you are forbidden from recreating such a spell, but I will regardless. You WILL NOT recreate such a spell. To do so would be HIGH TREASON, and the fact you were originally a mare WOULD NOT be a defence. Even I would not have the power to protect you.
I trust you Twilight, do not break that trust.
As to your question as to why your spell did this to you: I cannot say. It should be impossible, due to interference from the existing transformational residue, but Starswirl the Bearded was a singular genius; unequalled before or since. He regularly made spells that did the impossible, and he was never in the habit of explaining how his spells worked.
That said, Twilight, I implore you to not dwell on what cannot be changed. I know that you – filly or colt – are the same brilliant young mage that brought wonder to this old mare's heart.
You may find that you enjoy being a stallion.
Your Friend,
Celestia.
p.s. I also hope you know how disastrous abusing temporary polymorph spells would be to the integrity of your psyche after such a significant physical change.
p.p.s. Unlike alicorn mares, alicorn stallions should be able to produce offspring with mortal ponies (in addition to other alicorns). Do with that as you will.
Twilight Sparkle stared unblinking at the letter levitated in front of her as she read the letter for the fifth time. She ignore the strangely familiar buzzing anticipation that lingered in the back of her mind.
“So, um, bad news?” Spoke Spike as he wrung his claws, a nervous tick that Twilight had always found adorable.
Twilight snorted, 'Bad'? More like catastrophic.
Spike must have recognized the emotions on the alicorn's face, “Oh, cheer up Twilight. So what Princess Celestia can't help, you are more than smart enough to fix this on your own.”
“That ...” Twilight couldn't help but flinch at the voice coming out of her mouth. It was deep, smooth, powerful and fundamentally masculine. Objectively, not a bad voice, but it was not her voice, “... is not the problem.” Twilight levitated the letter to Spike.
The wyrmling was silent as he read the Princess' letter, his expression slowly darkening to a scowl, “She can't do this.”
Twilight scoffed, “Of course she can, she's Princess Celestia, Sovereign Princess of Equestria.” It was not her voice, but it was seeming likely that it would be his.
“But what about the Clover Treaty? Isn't magical law supposed to be independent of sovereign law?” The Clover Treaty was the oldest piece of legislation still in force in Equestria – first written shortly after the Unification, approximately 40 centuries ago – it established the Mages' Guild and gave it complete jurisdiction over magical law.
Although the Mages' Guild no longer existed – it, like all other major trade guilds effectively ceased to exist after the Razing of Everfree – Princess Celestia had established the Council of Magi as a successor organization shortly after the Third Founding. A decision that had proven ... controversial to House Twilight – Twilight Sparkle's own family – who believed themselves to be the legitimate successor to the Mages' Guild.
Twilight sighed, “Except in cases where a spell presents an existential threat to Equestria, her ponies or any of her tribes.” Of course, the legal separation of magical law did not mean that ponies couldn't break Equestrian law with magic; assault was assault regardless of whether it was done with force of hoof or horn. Moreover there were a few crimes that could only be done using magic, mindslaving being the most notable.
But, as a rule, spells themselves were not outlawed, only outcomes. After all, even spells, natures and schools of magic named Forbidden by magical law could be used for good; compulsions and geasa were often used to treat mental illness, biomancy had all but eliminated a wide variety of hereditary congenital diseases, and even necromancy was the most effective known way to treat malignant tumours.
“But that's never been used.” Spike protested.
“It's been used at least once, apparently.” The alicorn corrected, gesturing to the letter.
Spike was silent for a moment, “I guess,” he sighed, “I hate it.”
“I don't like it any more than you; quite a bit less I would wager.” Twilight, trotted awkwardly to a table; everything about how the alicorn moved felt wrong, legs too long, muscles too strong, barrel too thick, a deep seated expectation for violence that would not come.
Twilight stared at the small pile of hornwritten notes laying upon the table, the result of a dozen hours worth of preliminary research into creating a spell to restore the alicorn's lost maresculinity. “But ...” 'I trust you Twilight, do not break that trust.' Twilight levitated the assorted notes in front of her face. Notes that could apparently be the catalyst for the extinction of ponykind.
If what Princess Celestia said was correct, then the entire species had been teetering on the edge of extinction for about 2000 years. So close to oblivion, so few even aware; Twilight certainly hadn't been. 'I trust you Twilight, do not break that trust.'
With that in mind, the Princess' demand – while unanticipated, and certainly unwelcome – was not actually unreasonable. Ponies were on the edge of a precipice and all it would only take one little push. 'I trust you Twilight, do not break that trust.'
Twilight stared at the notes and a single tear flowed down a very unmarelike muzzle. 'I trust you Twilight, do not break that trust.' “... I can't betray Princess Celestia.” Suddenly the notes burst into magenta flames, burning away to nothing, not even ash.
The stallion immediately broke down sobbing, sitting down on an unfamiliar rump.
Spike wrapped his arms partway around the much larger male's forelegs, nuzzling his snout against Twilight's neck
No words were spoken for a considerable time as Twilight Sparkle, Equestria's first Alicorn Prince mourned what he had lost.
---
Celestia stared impassively at the letter before her, only her tail indicating of her agitation.
This ...
... this was not to plan.
What was it with her students and recklessly unearthing secrets better left buried?
And in this, as always, her darling Twilight was a true overachiever.
Of course it was Twilight Sparkle who stumbled upon some long lost spell of Starswirl the Bearded, transforming herself into a stallion in complete disregard of how that should have been impossible!
Even without trying, the young mare had stumbled backwards into – perhaps – the darkest period of Equestrian history.
A period where the very fate of the species hung in the balance.
A period that had taught two young immortals the burden of rule. To make difficult decisions when necessary, to sacrifice the few for the good of the many.
A period that had driven a wedge between two sisters who had formerly been inseparable.
Celestia remembered their subjects' love and adoration change to terror and hatred as ever more draconian and desperate measures were put into place.
Celestia had then learned just ho short the memories of mortals were; her little ponies had all but forgotten what had happened in shockingly little time, and it was trivial for Celestia to burn or rewrite every book that had ever mentioned the unfortunate period. An action that – regardless of how much Luna decried it – was ultimately necessary.
Not for the first time Celestia found herself envying mortals; she would never forget what had happened, she could never forget.
Celestia remembered her many fruitless attempts to drown the pain in drink, feasts and an unending series of enthusiastic young studs. Her vices had dulled the pain, but they had slowly taken over her life, leaving Luna increasingly alone in the less glamorous parts of ruling.
Once again, Celestia was grateful that she had discovered a way to break the iron hold that such grief and vice had once held on her heart. A method that had once again come useful to tame the nightmare that was a young Twilight Sparkle.
Luna had coped in a very different way. The night princess had thrown herself fully into work – her duties and her art –as if she couldn't stand a single idle moment to think.
And much like Celestia, the lunar princess escalated in her coping mechanisms. When her existing duties had failed to occupy her enough she waded into the nightmare that was the Equestrian bureaucracy to conduct a series of audits. Replacing favoured daughters of noble houses with nameless commoners because they had been 'misappropriating' funds or some other banal charge of corruption.
It did not win Luna any friends in the nobility.
And then Luna delved into the intricacies of the law. A subject that she had originally found 'dreadfully boring', and had left Celestia to handle. Not that there was much to handle, most of the laws were holdovers of the prior Republic of Equestria – written in books that had been painstakingly protected from the deprivations of Discord – and most of the rest were written by the nobility.
Celestia still remembered those awful mornings where Luna would appear, outraged at some ancient law and the hungover sun princess would need to explain that all the 'oversights' and 'loopholes' that Luna had found existed for reasons. That they were the price for the support of the Noble Houses.
Unfortunately, Luna had never understood the importance that compromise served in politics.
And then there was the political nightmare that would follow as Luna would try to force reformations of Equestria's many governing bodies; only for one noble house or another to kill it before it even got of the ground, exactly what Celestia had told her would happen.
And then Luna would storm off in a huff, leaving Celestia to smooth things over with the aggrieved noble house. A process that all too often required concessions on the behalf of the Crown.
Celestia sighed, perhaps her sister had listened and learned all the wrong lessons; much of the Nightmare's early propaganda had focused on how much the 'decadent nobility' and their 'degenerate princess' 'abused' and 'manipulated' the Equestrian legal framework to get away with things illegal for the common pony.
The sun princess shook her head and looked down to the letter before her. As much as it pained Celestia to deny Twilight's request, it was imperative that such a spell never see the light of day again. Ponykind was – even two thousand years later – still teetering on the edge of extinction. And, quite frankly the continuation of the species was simply more important than any one pony being the 'right' sex.
The solar princess looked at the series of photographs – Celestia was always proud of her little ponies' inventiveness – that the younger royal had taken of herself. It was undeniable that the newly made stallion was outright ravishing, the kind of beauty that had motivated ancient queens to war. Celestia knew that her younger self would have been utterly captivated with the young alicorn, drooling – literally, metaphorically and euphemistically – at the prospect of being with him.
Celestia was, once again, glad that she had moved past such base urges.
In all honestly, the elder princess had not been entirely forthcoming with Twilight, she did have a single idea of what – or rather who – could have caused her student's transformation.
The solar princess took out a single golden coin – actually composed of fool's gold because someone found that funny – and flipped it.
Tails, Celestia grimaced at the impression of a certain Spirit's hindquarters; it was a rather rude image, even if he lacked most of the anatomy that would make it lewd. Getting tails on the flip essentially guaranteed that what came next would be uncomfortable.
True to form, only a few moments passed until Celestia felt a pressure deep in her left ear canal.
For several moments the pressure grew before something burst from her ear with a horrible squelching pop.
“Discord.” Celestia spoke unamused, not even sparing a glance at whatever asinine visual gag the troublesome draconequus had set up.
A weight settled onto the princess' back and a familiar face slithered into her field of view and around her horn. “Oh, Celly, my love. How you must have missed me to call me back so suddenly? To tug on my shackles, so?”
Celestia lifted the coin in a hoof, “If you find your 'shackles' so unsatisfactory, there is always another option. I do miss my statue.”
Discord snorted, “You did not call me here to threaten me. I am far too valuable to you to be petrified again.”
“No, I did not. But after your method of arrival, perhaps I am reconsidering.”
Discord slid off the alicorn's back and slithered around to face Celestia snout to muzzle, “Then do it. Send a letter to Twilight and her friends about how you need to them to repetrify me because I offended your delicate little feelings.”
Celestia stared blankly at Discord, forgetting to emote. This was not how the draconequus was expected to react.
It took all of Discord's incredible mental fortitude to not flinch. He was reminded of the future Twilight, whose placid royal facade had broken several times to reveal the underlying rage. But instead of anger or hurt hiding underneath there was simply nothing.
Oh, Celestia what did you do to yourself? Discord pretended to examine his talon dismissively, letting none of his inner turmoil show, “What do you want, Celestia?”
Celestia flinched in surprise before refocusing on him and speaking as if she hadn't just ... lapsed “Where were you these last few weeks?”
“Oh, just contemplating my place in the universe.” Discord made a dismissive gesture with his talon.
Celestia's eyes narrowed in suspicion, “Where?”
Discord examined the princess for a second, there was something ever so slightly wrong in her expression, like she was imitating an emotion without quite understanding what it meant. “Your old castle at Everfree, as a matter of fact.” He paused, “Why? What happened in my absence? What are you trying to pin on me?”
“Why would you assume I'm trying to 'pin' something on you? Maybe because you're guilty of something?”
Discord snorted, “Nice try Princess. There are only two reasons why you would summon me: one, you want me to do something and two, you think I did something. In the former case you wouldn't be sointerested in what I have been occupying my time wit.”
Celestia grit her teeth, “So, you're denying doing anything to Twilight?”
“I haven't seen her in weeks. Why? How's Twiggles doing?”
Celestia's expression froze for a second before her eyes narrowed, “Where did you hear that name?”
“Oh, the little birdies told me.” Discord smirked.
“Where did you hear that name?!”
Discord rolled his eyes, “Do you have any idea how many ponies went to school with her? Oh, the stories they tell about 'Princess Celestia's faithful student'. It will be a good hundred years till you'll be able to write that out of history.” Discord made a meaningful look at the Princess, well aware of her censorial tendencies, “I swear, that filly was my spirit animal. A shame you had to go and make her so boring.”
“Twilight comes from a difficult family, they have been an unreasonable and contrary element for the last thousand years.”Celestia sighed, “And her mother is even worse; she is one of the singularly most unpleasant individuals I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.”
“Hmmm, sounds so exciting; I would love to know more.”
“Stop trying to change the subject.”
“But it's such a bore. Twilight went and did something ... antisocial – again – and you can't possibly bring yourself to believe she's at fault – despite past history – and have decided to use me as your scapegoat.”
Celestia made a facsimile of a glare.
“Let me guess, little Twiggles once more went and cast some Forbidden Grey Magic on some poor helpless civilian.” Discord faked a yawn before glancing at his wrist, “Oh, look at the time, unless you have something important to discuss, I've got to get going.”
“Fine,” Celestia pulled out one of the photos – one of the few that wasn't outright scandalous – and placed it on the table before her. Celestia hoped that one of her student's friends – probably Rarity – would point out that camera angles that would be innocuous on a mare were most certainly not on a stallion.
Discord took a deep look at the alicorn stallion with very familiar colours, and although the picture did not show the stallion's emblem, Discord would bet that it would be just as familiar, “Fascinating. So Twiggles finally got tired of being a kissless virgin and summoned herself from a timeline where she was born a stallion. You have explained to her that extradimensional versions of herself still count as incest, right?”
Celestia rolled her eyes, “Guess again.”
“Oh, she cloned herself as a stallion?”
“No.”
“Long lost evil twin?”
Celestia sighed, “That is Twilight.”
“Oh, an unconventional solution, and one that neatly sidesteps the incest problem. I like it.”
“It wasn't intentional, in fact, the spell she cast shouldn't have been able transform her like this.”
“And you think I tampered with her spellcasting?” Discord scoffed, “Give me some credit Celestia, I'm not suicidal. Friend or not, I refuse to be within a hundred miles of Twilight when she's casting experimental spells. I'm offended that you would ever think I would ever interfere with one of her spells, I don't want to find myself shattered across a thousand different universes; after all, I don't even have a plucky young apprentice to put me together again.”
“So, you're saying that you had no part in Twilight's situation?”
“That's what I've been trying to tell you for the last five minutes. No, I did not turn Twilight into a stallion, nor did I interfere in any way in her spellcasting.”
“If I find out you lied to me, I will be very displeased.”
“You won't, Celly.” Discord paused, “Oh, before I go, I found a rather less than useful mirror with a rather interesting inscription in the ruins. Any idea what that's about?” The draconequus felt no need to tell the alicorn of his visions, but he was curious why the mirror had been left in the castle.
Celestia sighed, “I had forgotten about the Mirror of Etaf. In the last days of Everfree, shortly before Luna fell to the Nightmare, the Artificer's Guild had some rather strange ideas. That mirror was just one of many tragedies of that period, it was to be the first of their 'subscription artifacts', powerful artifacts that would only work for ponies who paid for the privilege. Unfortunately, the mirror's creator, Sharp Foresight, died shortly after finishing it, and never transferred authority to the guild. Myself and Luna got to each scry the future three times before it was rendered useless.” Celestia shook her head, “The magnum opus of one of Equestria's brightest ponies as worthless as a rock due to greed and paranoia.”
Discord remained silent, letting the princess speak.
“If the mirror hadn't been exhausted, if I didn't waste the three scryings I did have, maybe I could have saved my sister.” The grief on Celestia's face was distant and subdued, but it was the first authentic emotion the mare had shown in the meeting.
Discord stared for a second before speaking softly, “It doesn't work like that.”
Celestia paused and looked to Discord in askance.
“Knowing that a future is coming does not necessarily give you the ability to change it. Often, quite the opposite, as the actions you take attempting to change the future may end up causing that future instead. I know that from experience.”
Celestia paused, giving that same blank look.
“Oh, and Celestia, do not dwell on what could have been done differently. It does no good to sacrifice the future for a past that will never be.”
Celestia still didn't respond, her expression still that unnerving blank look.
“Well, Celly, good talk,” Discord patted the mare on her withers, “But I have some highly important brooding to get to, so toodles.” The draconequus snapped his talon, liquefied and flowed into a nearby drain.
Celestia stared at the brand new drain in the centre of her sitting room, perhaps she should send a letter to Twilight about that useless mirror, her former student could certainly use something to distract from the current difficulties.
On second thought perhaps she should wait a bit, Twilight was likely going to be busy with the upcoming heat season. Perhaps Celestia should see about getting a studding license expedited for the newly minted stallion.
---
Twilight brought a hoof to his muzzle and wiped his tears away with his fetlock. “Thank you, Spike.”
The wyrmling pulled back.
Twilight flopped onto his back and groaned, “What do I do now, Spike?” Twilight was lost, his every waking hour since the transformation had been consumed with attempting to reverse it, to return his lost maresculinity. And now that that had been denied ... well, he had no idea what to do.
Spike blushed, covering his face and adverted his eyes, “Twilight.” he protested.
“What is it Spike?” the stallion asked before looking down, he was so incredibly exposed. The newly made stallion blushed incandescently as he futilely attempted to cover his shame with his tail.
The stallion rolled upright, ignoring the cold of the floor on his nethers, he looked away from his adoptive son/brother.
There was a brief pause before Spike hugged the stallion again, “You'll figure it out, you always do.”
Twilight channelled what little bravado he had, “It is only the second largest physical change I've been through.” It was true, as much as many trivialized Twilight's ascension to alicornhood as merely growing a pair of wings, it was actually a fundamental change to her deepest nature. A change that the alicorn still didn't understand. Alicorns were not – as often believed – merely a combination of the best features of the three most populous tribes, but were rather something entirely more than any mortal pony.
It was also significantly less instant a transformation than was public knowledge. The wings might have come in instantly, but ... well, Twilight winced as he remembered the months of passing her entire skeleton as kidney stones and calcified faeces as the calcium in her bones were gradually replaced with alicorn purer than even a unicorn's horn.
And the less said about the unique experience that is having one's internal organs reconfigure themselves into something completely alien to mortal ponies, the better.
Twilight still didn't know what even half of his new organs even did, despite a considerable amount of study. Something that neither Celestia nor Luna were particularly helpful with.
From an objective point of view, a mere change of sex was outright minor in comparison. Even better, the transformation was complete, total and finished. There would be no weeks of gradual change, this time.
That said, none of that made the alicorn any happier to be a stallion.
While Twilight had never been the most maresculine of mares, especially compared to the likes of Rainbow Dash and Applejack, she had been secure and comfortable in her marehood.
Twilight didn't want to be a stallion, she had been happy as a mare.
But it seemed that his preference had no bearing on such things. Twilight was now a stallion, and he would have to deal with that.
The alicorn prince lifted his head and did a quick glance around the room, the largest of the seven libraries in the recently grown Castle of Friendship, his eyes skimming over his personal banner – his cutie mark on a field of lavender – and one representing the elements of harmony – bearing the familiar charge containing the six coloured gems set in gold –and catching on the somewhat more obscure three six pointed stars of House Twilight.
The three stars of magenta, gold and silver – representing the three most common alignments of unicorn magic: arcane, solar and lunar -were set on a per chevron of azure and sanguine –representing the Pillar of Twilight, the mountain that was both the ancestral home of the Twilights and whence their name originated –it did not take an expert to recognize the banner as from a house that held magic in high regard. Although few would recognize the banner as belonging to House Twilight.
While House Twilight was far from a minor house, they were not well known, particularly among the common folk of Equestria. And among the nobility, they weren't well liked either, viewed as a strange hostile 'barbaric' house, a reputation that wasn't entirely unearned.
Canterlot had been built on Twilight land, but the city didn't fall under Twilight rule, as its land had been leased indefinitely to the Crown. As a result, House Twilight did not have much of a fiefdom. Outside the Twilight Manor itself – and 'manor' was a bit of a misnomer as it was more akin to a small city built into the mountain –only a handful of Canterlot's outer districts – the city had outgrown its original limits – and a dozen or so small villages at the mountain's base called House Twilight their liege.
Of course, despite lacking much of the traditional noble house's revenue stream the Twilights were hardly poor. They had many alternative streams of income. But with so few commoner subjects, it was hardly surprising that House Twilight was nearly unknown.
The banner was flown out of utility rather than any sense of loyalty or filial obligation. Twilight did not see eye to eye with his birth house, his family, and that had been the case since shortly after the young filly had started her apprenticeship under the Princess.
That said, there was absolutely nothing to gain by publicly airing such grievances, so Twilight flew as many banners expected of a proud royal of noble stock, and House Twilight added a crown to their banner as if they were proud that their 'heir presumptive' had ascended to alicorn nobility.
The last thing Twilight wanted was some manipulative bitch of a noblemare recognizing the schism and using it to attempt to weaponize Twilight against his birth house.
And there was always somepony willing to try. With the Twilights being as scorned as they are, probably several ponies.
Of course, it would end poorly for her, it always did. House Twilight was not trifled with lightly, and such an open antagonism would not be answered merely by an entry into the Book of Grudges.
Yeah, House Twilight had a Book of Grudges, it was over thirty volumes long, what kind of ponies even do that?
Oh, right, the kind of ponies who go and opt out of being herd herbivores to become pack predators. The kind of ponies that bespell, breed and train themselves for war, even in times of peace.
He hated his family.
Twilight sighed, and he hated politics more.
Somehow, he didn't think that becoming a stallion would help. In all honestly, the alicorn had no idea how the nobility would respond, but he was certain it would be unpleasant in several different ways.
Just another mess of problems that he couldn't possibly plan for.
Twilight shook his head and levitated a single sheet of paper, the only of his notes to have survived incineration. It was the sum total of everything the alicorn had about why his most recent transformation had even happened.
It was entirely conjecture and barely filled a page halfway.
“Why am I even a stallion?”
“Maybe you miscast the spell?”
Twilight rolled his eyes, “Of course I miscast the spell, but that doesn't explain it. A miscast fireball doesn't turn a pony into a potted plant, it just explodes in a way the caster didn't intend. The effect of a miscast spell are always of a similar kind to the intended effects, just less controlled. Pyromancy still creates fire, telekinesis still creates force, it just doesn't make sense that this spell could have caused this effect.”
Twilight paused, “This spell was an auramancy spell, the metamagical school concerning the direct manipulation of existing magic, there is absolutely no way that a spell designed to cycle the magic in my ley lines and expel impurities could possibly have been responsible for my transformation.”
“And yet it is?”
“And yet it is.” he sighed, “'When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, is the truth'.”
“Is it possible that the spell somehow caused a different spell to transform you?”
“Is it possible for an auramancy spell to activate another existing but dormant spell? Absolutely. Is that what happened here? Absolutely not. There simply was no latent mare-to-stallion transformation spell for the spell to activate. Quite the opposite, in fact, according to Princess Celestia.” And wasn't that a revelation, that stallions are so rare because of the lingering affects of spells cast two thousand years ago. That was a case of magical misuse that was terrifying in its scale. No wonder biomancy is considered Forbidden by the Council of Magi, as opposed to the merely Prohibited that House Twilight declared the school.
Spike looked puzzled for a few seconds before brightening in realization, “Oh I know, what if the spell somehow ... inverted ... the existing magic?”
Twilight bit back a scathing remark as he sighed and looked at the wyrmling in askance, “Spike, you can't 'invert the polarity on the thaumic streams'; this is real life, not one of your comic books.
Magic, simply, does not work like that, 'magic cannot act contrary to its nature'. A spell designed to transform a stallion into a mare cannot be altered in such a way to do the opposite, at least, not after it has been cast. Even more, the thaumic residue from such a spell would interfere with the use of any new spells acting contrary to its purpose; any new spell to transform mares into stallions would have to be designed to account for such residue, something that is extremely difficult to do even if you know the complete extent of that residue.” Twilight paused, “Which I do not, and I have no way of discovering it without a control to compare modern stallions to. Something I do not have, as this residue has apparently been endemic to the pony species for something like two thousand years.”
“Oh.”
“Honestly not only do I have no idea how this spell did what it did, I don't know how any spell could have possibly done this, not with the enormous amount of contrary residue. Nothing short of an outright disjunction would be required for such a smooth transformation.” Twilight's tone left no question as how absurd he considered that. “And considering I didn't explode with enough yield to vaporize Ponyville and most of the Everfree Forest I think it's safe to rule out that particular magic.”
“Disjunction?” Spike asked with concern.
Oh, right, Twilight often forgot that Spike didn't have a formal arcane education. Disjunction was rarely mentioned outside of cautionary tales in magical safety classes and strict hypotheticals in magic theory classes, and there wasn't much point in a dragon taking either of those. “A disjunction is, well, anti-magic. A spell designed to unweave the very threads of magic. They are known to be almost impossible to cast, as the spell constantly tries to rip itself apart as you are casting it, usually resulting in the spell blowing up in the caster's face.” Twilight grimaced, “And that's the better outcome, because in the few known examples of somepony actually successfully casting a disjunction, the spell proved to be rather indiscriminate, freely unweaving whatever magic was near the caster – starting with the caster herself – in the few microseconds the spell lasted before it ripped itself asunder. And well ...” Twilight paused, “... there are few living things that can survive having their innate magic unwoven, and fewer still that could survive the raw wild magic released by such an event.”
Spike was horrified, “Why would anypony do such a thing?”
“Because it's disjunction, do you have any idea what could be done if you were able to controllably unveave existing magic?”
“Uh, no.”
“You could undo just about any magic at will. Unweave millennia old curses, shatter the spells of adversaries, destroy otherwise indestructible dark artifacts. Even a less controlled – but still coherent –disjunction would be a horrifically deadly combat spell, shattering all magical protection and explosively ripping the target's own magic apart. Add to that, a competent mage could even use the power from unweaved magic to power her own spells, letting even a rather weak unicorn match spells with an alicorn as strong as ... well, me. Albeit, only for about an hour before the excess power causes her ley lines to burn out or her horn to shatter.” The alicorn shrugged his wings, “But, well, ponies researching disjunction are not well known for having a strong sense of self preservation.”
Spike stared in horror.
“But well, if you want a good example of the kinds of things a stable disjunction could do, think of the Elements of Harmony, but cast at will by a single unicorn without any of the many Virtue Magic related restrictions.” The stallion paused, “Although there is good evidence that the only reason they even work in the first place is because of those restrictions.”
“The Elements of Harmony!?”
“Yes, Spike, the Elements of Harmony. They are the only known thing capable of casting a coherent disjunction. Honestly, without the Elements, we probably wouldn't even know disjunction was even in the realm of possibilities.”
“So, the Elements could have just exploded you and the girls!?”
“Of course not Spike,” Twilight dismissively waved a hoof, “That would have killed us, the Elements of Harmony can't kill ponies, or even permanently harm them.”
“Uh, huh.” Spike said dubiously, eyeing the stallion as if he was about to explode.
“Oh, don't be a drama queen, Spike.” Twilight rolled his eyes, “I'm not going to explode.” He sighed, “So, ruling out a disjunction, we're left with ...” Twilight scanned his extremely anemic notes.
“Ruling out? What about the Elements of Harmony?”
Oh, right, he hadn't explained his reasoning for excluding the Elements. “The Elements are capable of doing many things that are otherwise impossible, but they are not subtle. If the spell had somehow invoked the Elements of Harmony, it would have been incredibly obvious, and my divinations didn't find even a hint of Virtue Magic.” Twilight paused, “Anyways, as I said, Virtue Magic is far more restricted than other forms of magic. There is nothing virtuous or harmonious about me suddenly being a stallion.”
“Oh.”
“So, ruling out a disjunction, we're left with ...” Twilight paused and stared at his notes, growing more agitated, that hideous anticipation ebbing in crescendo as the stallion lost what little remained of his hold on rationality.
Spike looked at the stallion in concern, “Twilight, are you ok ...”
“... absolutely bucking nothing!” Twilight snarled as he glared at the notes, his magical aura growing in strength.
The notes exploded.
Spike winced and dove for cover, it had been a long time since Twilight had lost control like this, but he hadn't forgotten what to do.
Twilight exploded, the solid crystal floor beneath him cratered, the nearby tables and chairs were launched to shatter against the walls as books were sent flying everywhere.
And in the middle of the devastation floated Twilight Sparkle, his coat stark white and his mane a burning inferno as the stallion's long forgotten heritage of a long lost tribe made itself apparent in its trademark incendiary way. “IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. IT BETRAYS ALL LOGIC. THERE IS NO POSSIBLE WAY FOR THIS TO HAVE HAPPENED. WHY? HOW? IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!!”
Spike remained silent as his adopted sibling/parent figure as he vented his not inconsiderable rage at the world in an increasingly incoherent rant. Although the stallion refused to say a word against his former mentor – even in his incandescent rage – it was clear that her refusal had deeply hurt the alicorn.
---
Discord sat pensively in the ruined throneroom of the Everfree Castle. His throne was clearly incongruous with the surroundings, being composed entirely of living balloon animals, squirming and writhing beneath him. But considering that the original throne was conspicuously missing – the draconequus had visions of one feuding sister lifting it telekinetically and launching it at the other – he felt it was a reasonable replacement.
The draconequus was disquieted; while it had always been obvious that Celestia had greatly changed since he first met her, he had always assumed that it was merely the result of maturing over the many years that had passed hence. So much time had passed and she had been ever so young, not even the Great Esteemed Himself was immune to such wages of time, as testified by the embarrassing amount of introspection he had been doing recently.
But it was clear that that was not the case. Something had happened to the mare, or rather – if the evil flutterpony in the visions of the future had been telling the truth – Celestia had done something to herself. Something that would have caused her to drop dead in a distressingly mortal manner just a few years in the future. Something she had also made young Twilight do to herself.
The Spirit of Chaos drummed his talons as he stared at the five limbed, abstract representation of the Tree of Harmony that had once held the inert stone forms of the five sundered Elements of Harmony.
It was why he was here. Where it happened.
No, he was not referring to six courageous young mares freeing the lunar princess from the Nightmare, although that also had happened here.
No, he was thinking of the final confrontation of a bitter war of five years, sister against sister, Bearer against Bearer.
His imprisonment had given the draconequus a unique perspective of the entire conflict.
In retrospect, the conflict had been brewing for decades – perhaps even centuries – before blades had first been drawn. It had started with hushed whispers spoken between young noble spawn; Luna had apparently attempted some reforms that had turned out to be less than popular. At least amongst the populace of the wealthiest district of the nation's capital, the stationary nature of his imprisonment meant he was never able to get an adequate sample of the general population.
Then as time went on, those voices got bolder, their words got harsher. It wasn't long before there were ponies publicly denouncing the lunar princess and calling for her abdication. Discord hadn't understood at the time how ponies could get away with slandering a reigning Sovereign Princess like that; honestly he still didn't.
Then, suddenly, the town crier of twenty years was replaced with a mare dressed muzzle to tail in the Gaudy gilded suns of the Celestine Cult. The cultist decrying how the 'Terrible Nightmare' had showed her 'true colours', 'turned against the good ponies of Equestria' and 'betrayed her rightful Princess'.
The next months were full of triumphant announcements of 'glorious victory' against the 'cowardly traitors' by that same mare.
However, it didn't take long for Discord to notice that the numbers were not adding up. By six months into the war the official casualty figures had the Nightmare's entire estimated force annihilated thrice over, with almost negligible Loyalist casualties, and the disparity only grew from there.
Then the war wounded came back, mares of broken bodies or shattered minds.
They spoke of a different war.
Of endless night ambushes and supply raids, leaving Equestria's loyal soldiers without rest or food.
Of incompetent leadership arrogantly waltzing into improbable losses against much inferior forces.
Of resolute enemies who would remain unbreaking even in the face of complete annihilation, certain that their sacrifice would be smiled upon by their traitor Queen.
Of a strange daemonic tribe of ponies, with 'wings of bat and eyes of cat, fangs of snake and rage of drake'. The Nightmare's elite, able to fight with the ferocity of ten mares and turn the minds of good ponies against themselves.
Of the Nightmare herself, whose very appearance on the battlefield would turn a certain victory for the loyalists into a crushing defeat as she fought – horn and wing and hoof – with skill and power unmatched by any mortal pony.
Of Princess Celestia, who would likewise turn a minor defeat into a Pyrrhic victory as her uncontrolled nirik sunfire burned through friend and foe alike.
By the third year of the conflict, it became obvious to anyone who listened that not only were the loyalists loosing, they were loosing badly.
Five of Equestria's seventeen great duchies had raised banners against Celestia, another eleven had lost portions of their lands to active insurgent presences. Only the Royal Duchy of Everfree remained entirely in Equestrian control.
Equestrian soldiers across the nation were deserting and turning to banditry.
Celestia had met the Nightmare spell to spell; the sisters fought for three days and three nights while Canterlot – a city of 600 000, for which the modern capital was named –burned, until not even ruins remained.
The Second Equestrian Army – the greatest single force in the history of the Principality raised by the 'great' Commander Zephyr, Heir Apparent of House Hurricane, to be the hammer that would crush the rebellion – had outright disappeared after a humiliating defeat had cost them nearly one mare in four.
Loyal nobles across the Principality were dying or vanishing in increasing numbers, their replacement invariably being more friendly to the rebels.
Meanwhile in Everfree, the Celestine Cult had used the war to seize an immense amount of power, the bad news from the war was only matched by the brutality of the Celestines in suppressing it. The sun princess' cult arrested anypony who didn't echo their own narrative on the war – which still remained an increasingly impossible series of heroic victories – for treason.
That narrative, of course, had completely shattered when the Nightmare marched into the City of Everfree with an army of her Lunatic Cultists, completely crushing what was left of the loyalist garrison.
Honestly, Discord did not blame Celestia for being desperate enough to use the Elements. The situation was dire.
Nonetheless, it had been a terrible mistake. The Elements were not meant to be wielded by a single bearer, they were not meant to be turned against another of their bearers, they were not meant to be wielded by a pony who had so failed their Virtues.
He could still feel the selfishness and the cruelty, the lies and betrayal, the overwhelming despair that led to that final desperate act. It was faint, and nearly completely eclipsed by the Elements' much more recent triumph, but that taint would last in this place forever.
Discord shuddered, he remembered feeling the very Virtues of Harmony being sundered from the Terrestrial Plane, rendering the Elements into useless stone spheres.
He had seen what happened when the Lunatics had their Loyalty to their Goddess stolen from them, leaving only madness and rage in its absence. The moment when 'Lunatic' became synonymous with 'madmare'.
He had seen the great city of Everfree burn.
There was a small part of Discord that was glad that he spent the subsequent period alone as a statue. He had no desire to see to what ponykind would be reduced absent the Virtues of Harmony. Without loyalty or honesty, kindness or generosity, without joy.
And if the sundering of the Virtues of Harmony had driven the Lunatics mad, what had it done to Princess Celestia?
And what did she do to herself?
As Discord sat in quiet contemplation, the alicorn of war and darkness – buried under twenty tonnes of stone – called out voicelessly mere metres away.
---
Twilight sat wordlessly, his rage had burned itself out, leaking him only feeling somewhat empty and emotionally exhausted, “I'm deeply sorry for that, Spike. I should have never let my emotions get the best of me.”
“You don't need to apologize, you're entitled to feel upset.”
“No.” Twilight responded with intensity, “I'm not, I can't. I have to be better than that. I'm far too powerful. I could kill a pony, or worse ...” Twilight trailed off, staring into the distance. I'm sorry, Princess Celestia; I'm a Bad Pony.
“Worse? What could be worse than killing somepony?”
Oh, so many things Spike, after all 'Magic is the key to infinite wonders and horrors beyond comprehension'. The stallion sighed, “Nothing that you need concern yourself with, Spike.”
Spike frowned, “Is this another 'I'll tell you when you're older' thing?” He pouted, “I'm not a baby, Twilight.”
“No, it's a 'Hopefully, I'll never be in the position where I need to tell you' thing. There are things that are best if you never know, magics that are best kept secret.”
“Is this to do with the 'Dark' and 'Grey' magics Princess Celestia mentioned in in her letter?”
Twilight slammed a hoof into his face, of course Spike would manage to put two and two together, he had just read the terms from the Princess' letter. A letter that Twilight – in his foolishness – had given to him to read. Unfortunately, Spike had already learned enough to pique his youthful curiosity, enough to point him in the right direction if wished to know; especially considering his access to Twilight's library. Twilight sat down on his haunches as he stared Spike in the eyes. “Spike, what I'm about to tell you is secret. That means you can't tell anypony about it. Not even the other Elements of Harmony; especially not the Cutie Mark Crusaders.” That last point was crucial, nopony wanted young foals to discover that they had a Talent for fell Dark magic, or less corruptive but still incredibly dangerous Grey magic.
Spike's eyes widened, while he was young, he understood the severity in Twilight's voice. The wyrmling put his claw over his heart and nodded solemnly, “I promise.”
Twilight sighed and adopted a lecturing tone, “After the formation of the Mage's Guild and the formalizing of arcana as a field of study, there was a massive explosion in magical knowledge. With many entirely new schools and natures of magic discovered in a very short amount of time. It rapidly became obvious that some of the new magic had ... unfortunate side effects on those using them, corrupting anypony who used them. Thus the Guild had an emergency moot, during which such magic was declared to be 'Dark Magic' and was Prohibited, meaning that only those with a specific licence could legally use such magic.”
If the history books Twilight had found in the Crystal Empire were to be believed that moot had also been the inciting incident of the First Equestrian Civil War, later known as the Umbrum War. A conflict which had transformed the mostly peaceful city-state of Equestria into the militaristic and imperialistic Republic of Equestria; a republic that would eventually be the greatest empire that the world had ever known.
From what those books had said, whatever thing it was that they had fought in the Crystal Empire couldn't have been more than a pale shadow of the Umbrum king.
“Then much later the concept of 'Grey Magic' was added, referring to magic that – while not innately corruptive – could be used to corrupt somepony, either in folly or malice. And while the precise legal definition of 'corruption' is somewhat debated ...” meaning that there were several archmagi who claimed Virtue Magic was Dark. As if his friends becoming more attuned to the virtue that they embody was in any way analogous to the twisting of mind, body or spirit caused by actual Dark Magic, “... it's pretty self evident, as far as I'm concerned. Corruption is a permanent, detrimental change to one's mind, body or magic.”
Twilight twisted his magic in a way that was painful and nauseating and itchy and produced dozens of other awful sensations that Equish had no words for as tainted purple magic leaked from his eyes and his horn lit a malevolent black, “B̸͓̽e̷̖̕h̵̫̀o̴̲̒l̴̳̍d̸̻̊,̷͇͆ ̸̘̿C̴̗̾o̷̩̒r̴͔̾r̸͉̒u̸̢̽p̸̦̂t̷̤͠i̸͓͊ȯ̷̤n̷̍ͅ ̸̮̽M̴̧̛a̷̢͘g̸͙͝ḯ̵͔c̴͜͠,̴̝̔ ̸̯̉t̶̥̂ḧ̸͚́ë̸̳ ̶͓̿ö̷͈́r̸̼͠ḭ̵͒g̶̰̀ḯ̵͍n̷̤̓a̵͕͐l̵̯̎ ̶̮̇D̷̟͊a̸̙̍r̴͉͋k̶͖̒ ̷͓͠Ṃ̴͘ä̷̙g̶̛̰i̶͉̿ċ̸͍.̷̗̕ ̶̤̊I̷̬͝t̵̠̓'̷͇̄s̴̙͑ ̶̥͆.̸̦̅.̷̩͒.̶̝̅” whatever the stallion was going to say next was lost as his magic suddenly cut out ashe wobbled on his hooves before vomiting onto the ground and collapsing.
Spike's eyes widened in panic as he rushed to the stallion's side, “Twilight, are you okay.”
Twilight just groaned as he regretted the life choices that led to this moment, feeling like an entire herd of ponies had galloped over his brainmeats – this was the worst corruption magic backlash he had felt since the first time he cast such magic –not too different from a hangover. or at least that's what Twilight had heard. He was far too powerful a mage to have the luxury of dabling with mood altering drugs like alcohol.
“Oh, Sparkles'll be fine,” A voice drawled the other side of the room, “Just give him a few moments to contemplate his poor choices. I mean, Dark Magic so shortly after such a major transformation? Seriously?”
Twilight shakily got to his hooves and made an obscene wing-gesture at the mare.
Dame Shadow Star laughed, “Atta boy, that's the spirit, show that Twilight steel in your spine.”
Twilight sighed, Shadow – along with her twin sister Dame Deep Umbra – composed the alicorn's royal guard. The two mares were actually Twilight's first cousins; their mother had tragically died in childbirth and as their father had been a contract stud they went to their uncle – Twilight's father – and had been raised by House Twilight. They were Twilight in all but name ... and blood and title and magic and Id and hereditary enchantments ...
... well, they were very Twilight in their temperament and ethos, at least. Honestly, much like an inverse to Twilight Sparkle himself. The familial relation combined with the prototypical Twilight disdain for noble hierarchy and propensity for banter resulted in a relationship that was very atypical of an alicorn royal with his guards/knights. At least Umbra attempted to be polite, even if she didn't always succeed.
The black unicorn lounged lazily upon the largest stack of fallen books – her short, messy indigo mane splayed out under her – seemingly uncaring about anything going on around her. It was – of course – a carefully practised act; despite the air of oblivious sloth Shadow exuded, she was certainly ready in the rare case a pony were to actually attack her charge.
Shadow – like her sister – was a fully qualified Battle Mage and a combat veteran; having fought in both the Changeling War and the current Gryphon Civil War, as well as countless smaller conflicts. The mare had a body count well into three digits, although Twilight didn't know the precise number; there just wasn't a comfortable way to ask a pony how many ponies/gryphs/lings/assorted creatures she had killed.
Twilight looked away from his most vexing guard and to his faithful assistant, who was staring at him with a mixture of concern and horror. Twilight made a dismissive gesture with a wing, “I'm fine Spike.”
Spike said nothing as he glanced at the puddle of sick by Twilight's hooves, before staring at the alicorn.
“Oh, don't be like that,” Twilight lit his horn and vanished the evidence, “A little Corruption Magic never hurt anypony – I'd have to use it hundreds of times to have any noticeable permanent adverse effects – it's just ... rather uncomfortable to use.”
Spike frowned, “Why would anypony use it?”
“Because a unicorn can use it to do things that would otherwise be incredibly difficult if not impossible to do with unicorn magic, like casting spells in opposition of your alignment or even imitating the magic of another tribe. For example King Sombra used Corruption Magic to imitate crystal pony magic, both to generate those dark crystals he liked to use and to draw power from the fear and despair of the crystal ponies. Add to that, every time using Corruption Magic is easier than the last.”
Spike sighed, “That's pretty Evil, Twilight.”
“King Sombra was evil, yes, but Corruption Magic isn't, it's just ... dangerous ... if overused.”
“And how precisely is it dangerous?”
“Well, if used enough, it apparently starts to feel good, good enough to become addictive. And then ... well ... you gradually loose the ability to use any magic that isn't Corruption Magic, go insane and transform into an umbrum. And before you ask, I don't know what an umbrum is, other than Sombra was apparently one, but one individual is hardly enough to define an entire population.”
Spike hugged the stallion again, “I love you Twilight, I don't want you to go mad or become an 'umbrum'.”
“Technically, the singular form of 'umbrum' is 'umbra'”
“No, it's not, Shadow.” Twilight said loudly, not even glancing at the mare in question, “An umbra and an umbrum are completely distinct things and the plural form of the former is 'umbrae'. Stop making things up in order to imply unfortunate things about your sister.”
“Bah, you're no fun.”
Twilight rolled his eyes, before looking softly at Spike, “I'm not going go mad or turn into an umbrum, Spike. Do you really think I am that careless?”
Spike deadpanned at the stallion.
Twilight pouted in mock offence, “Hey, I'm not that bad.”
“Face it, Sparkles, you ain't known for your prudence nor caution when it comes to subjects arcane. Why, House Twilight has acquired some parasprites with the most distressingly odd diet. The faces on the bucking gryph rebel scum when those tiny fluffballs started consuming their arms and armour was hilarious, and when they started eating their tents? Hah, pure gold.”
Wasn't that a concerning revelation, that House Twilight had apparently deployed parasprites in war. “Wait, how do you know about parasprites? I couldn't find a single book that mentioned them.”
“Did you check the Manor's libraries?”
“You know I haven't been to the manor since I was eight.”
“Well, thar's yer problem. The Twilights have a bunch of books about all the many beasties and whatnot of the Everfree Forest. After their ancestors – your ancestors – spent those ten generations of exile in the forest.”
“I've already told you why I can't return.” Twilight glared at his guard, both she and her sister had an unfortunate habit of bringing up the subject of his self-imposed exile, it was the most exasperating part of having them as guards.
“You know, for as much as you claim to hate your mother, you sure give her a lot of power over you. High Lady Twilight Velvet the Mad is hardly the be all and end all of House Twilight. In fact, some would say she's the least.” Shadow, put a surprising amount of malice in that last word.
Twilight flinched, “What? I don't give her power over me.”
Shadow gracefully stood up upon her pile of books and stared down at her charge “Then why ...” she stalked down the pile, “...do you refuse to return to your ancestral home, to your family? Why do you send them away when they come to you? They miss you ... we miss you.”
Twilight looked away from the unicorn, “I'm sorry, I just can't.”
The mare trotted up to the larger stallion and gave him an affectionate nuzzle, “I don't know what that mare put you through, and I'm deeply sorry that we failed to protect you, but you can't let the hurt alienate you from those of us who care for you.”
Twilight took a step back and gave his cousin a cold look, “You're right, you don't know what she put me through.” he paused, “I wish she had hurt me.”
Shadow stared at the alicorn agape, “What?”
“She didn't hurt me, she twisted me. She raised me to be her little pet monster, she raised me to be a Bad Pony.” Twilight was breathing heavy in aggression as he stared down at the mare, barely stopping himself from attacking her. He wanted to hunt something. He wanted to kill something.
Shadow stared in confusion at Twilight and mouthed 'bad pony', the foalish incongruity was deeply out of character for the scholarly alicorn.
Twilight's eyes widened as he realized what he had thought, I'm sorry Princess Celestia, I'm a Bad Pony, “Leave.”
“Wha ...”
“I said LEAVE.”
The guardsmare – knocked back and deafened by the Royal Canterlot Voice – scampered unsteadily out of the library.
There was a long silence as neither alicorn nor wyrmling spoke.
Twilight turned to Spike “So, Spike, where were we?”
Spike glanced at the door Shadow had left by and back at the stallion, “Twilight, are you okay?”
Twilight deadpanned, “Spike, I'm a stallion, I don't know why, and I can't change back. Of course I'm not okay.”
“So we're not going to talk about that.” Spike gestured at the door.
“I don't see why we would need to, Dame Shadow merely overstepped her bounds.”
“Uh huh ...” Spike replied dubiously.
There was another short silence.
“Okay, so despite not being inherently corruptive like Dark Magic, Grey Magic can be just as dangerous, if not moreso, than Dark Magic; it depends on the specific schools or natures you're comparing. In fact most of the infamous magics commonly colloquially referred to as 'dark' are in fact Grey Magic: dreamwalking, mind magic, soul magic, biomancy, to name a few.”
“Wait, 'soul magic' as in necromancy?”
Twilight chuckled, “No, not in the slightest, they're completely unrelated in fact. And necromancy is Dark, as Dark as magic comes, actually.” Technically necromancy was only the second darkest magic, but there was no way in Tartarus that Twilight was ever going to even imply the existence of that to Spike. “Although not for the reasons the common ponies think.”
“What do you mean?”
“Most common ponies look at something like a zombie and immediately think 'dark magic', but if the the animating of dead ponies as corpse-puppets was all there was to necromancy, then it wouldn't even warrant being Grey Magic. The problem is that necromancy is death magic, it doesn't play well with life magic – 'magic abhors its opposite' and all that – and well, ponies are powered by life magic.”
Spike winced.
“Yeah, I've seen a couple pictures of acute necromantic poisoning, it's not pretty; the unfortunate soul's a dead mare walking, and I don't mean in the undead way. Her very cells are rendered incapable of reproducing: gonads, dead; bone marrow, dead; immune system, dead; intestinal lining, dead. Even the cutting edge of modern medical science can only keep her ... I hesitate to say 'alive' ... for at best two weeks before she's too far gone, her very organs liquefying as their constituent cells die without replacing themselves. The best that can be done for her is a quick peaceful death before it gets that far.”
Spike was green, well greener than usual. “Twi ...”
“I'm not going to touch necromancy, Spike.” Twilight shuddered, “I promise. I would use literally any other kind of magic before I even thought about using necromancy.” While not a lie, that statement was significantly less hypothetical than the alicorn implied. Twilight Sparkle had dabbled in every school of magic except necromancy, primarily in her foalhood under Twilight Velvet. It had apparently been somewhat of a controversy in House Twilight; while the Twilights were quite a bit less restrictive about magic than the Council of Magi, even the Twilights frowned upon teaching prepubescent fillies Grey and Dark magics. Umbra had confided in the alicorn that it was the only reason why the Twilights had let the young filly become Celestia's apprentice in the first place.
Velvet had so thoroughly twisted her daughter that the Twilight Council didn't have any better idea than to give her to apprentice under the Princess they viewed as an adversary. I'm sorry Princess Celestia, I'm a Bad Pony.
Twilight shook his head, “So, back to Grey Magic; since it's so topical, I will use biomancy as an example.” Twilight paused, “The school of biomancy is the school of magic concerned with the manipulation of biologic functions and the base life magic associated with them, it is of a diametrically opposed nature to necromancy. But don't let that deceive you, biomancy can be more dangerous than necromancy. The worst necromancy can do to a pony is to kill her. Kill her in a horribly gruesome and painful way, yes, but still only kill her. Biomancy can do so much worse.”
“Like, what?” Spike asked despite his better judgement.
“Like, for example, a spell that alters a pony's nerves so that all her pain receptors are permanently stimulated.”
Spike's eyes widened.
“She would be cursed to feel the greatest pain physiologically possible for the rest of her miserable, hellish life.” Twilight paused and stared mournfully at the wyrmling, “I could make that spell, Spike. It wouldn't even be difficult. Far easier than any beneficial biomancy spell; the body's a complex thing, breaking it is so much easier than improving it.”
Spike once again looked at the stallion with great concern. He didn't know what to say in response to that.
“Of course, I would never do such a thing.” This time there was no deceit in the statement, even as a filly Twilight hadn't been evil enough to do such a thing. I'm sorry Celestia, I'm a Bad Pony.
“That's good ...”
“But even without deliberate malice it's still dangerous. As I said, the body is complicated; even a tiny change can have dozens of other side-effects in other parts of the body that have to be accounted for if you don't want to encounter unforeseen difficulties. And even if you manage that, some adverse effects cannot be mitigated.” Twilight paused, “If I told you I could give you the strength of ten mares, like Spidermare, would you want it?”
“Uh, I guess ...” Spike replied extremely hesitantly.
“And if I told you that you'd also need to eat ten mares worth of food?”
Spike pondered it for a second before shaking his head.
“Good,” Twilight paused, “It wasn't a serious offer, I don't know nearly enough about dragon physiology to even know where to start. If you were a pony ... it would be difficult, sure, but I could do it.” Twilight adopted a focused expression, like he always did when working on a hard problem, “Tendons would need to be massively strengthened so they don't tear. Bones too would need to be strengthened to make sure they don't snap. The entire digestive system would need to be overhauled and accelerated in order to keep up with the caloric load; that would require some serious trade offs, the pony likely would be rendered completely incapable of digesting most complex carbohydrates and would need to rely entirely on highly calorie dense foods like simple carbohydrates and meat. The circulatory system would need to be overhauled as well, both to serve the much increased metabolic needs of the body and to deal with the massive blood pressure caused by the enhanced muscles in the heart. The increased metabolic need and reduced metabolic efficiency would result in a lot of waste heat, so that would need to be dealt with in some way, but the end result would certainly run more than a few degrees hotter than a normal pony; so heat resistance would be a must, especially the reproductive system which is particularly heat sensitive. The respiratory system would need some improvements, and hemoglobin counts would likely need to be increased. And, of course, all the many tissues of the body would need to be reinforced to survive the increased acceleration such a pony would be capable of.”
Twilight took a deep breath, “And that's just what I can think of off the top of my head, I estimate that creating such a spell would take me about a year.” And if the stallion were willing to venture back into Twilight Manor, he wouldn't even need to make the spell; one of his ancestors had done it for him. And the fact that none of his ancestors had cast that spell on themselves, despite their very well documented proclivity for such magic, spoke to just how significant the downsides were.
Of course, caloric needs were a much bigger deal back in the Dark Age; it was not a time of plenty and even the wealthy and powerful were never that far from starvation. It would have been utter madness for anypony to use such a spell in that time – at least if they had any hope for a long life or children – yet alone the Twilights – then known as the 'Order Stalwart of the Pillar of Twilight' as nobility hadn't actually existed in that period – who relied more on spell and wit than force of hoof.
“And then we need to talk about inheritance. Of traits, not of wealth, biomancy will always have some effect on the children of the pony in question. A well built biomancy spell will breed true for a hundred generations, slowly integrating with the ponies' magic until the change no longer even qualifies as foreign, but is rather a completely innate part of the ponies' base magic” That was how the many idiosyncratic traits of the Twilights had remained true over a thousand years after they had been cast into flesh, “A poorly built biomancy spell will decay over the generations causing somewhat unpredictable effects in the descendants of the original target.” Twilight grimaced, “Some of those effects can be pretty nasty, expecially considering how interdependent the changes caused by biomancy are.”
“Wait ...” Spike stated in realization, “Were the spells that the ancient ponies used to make colts into fillies biomancy?”
“Why, yes, Spike.” Twilight smiled at the wyrmling, “Well, they were a lesser subschool of biomancy, barely even qualifies. But ... well, 'barely even qualifies' still qualifies.” Twilight wing-shrugged, “It's a lot easier to transform an organism into something that already exists than to create something new. I doesn't solve all of the issues, but even an incompetent hack of a hedge mage could manage it if she had a good enough example; just do some nature transformation to produce life mana, imbue the spell with the intent and blueprint and guide the magic to the right places. It's a very stupid idea, but apparently the ancient ponies were phenomenally, incomprehensibly, apocalyptically STUPID.” Twilight snarled, feeling the distinct desire to tear out the long dead ponies' throats with his inequinely sharp teeth.
Spike looked at the alicorn in caution, ready to flee, but it became clear that he wasn't going to explode ... again.
Twilight took several deep breaths, successfully calming himself down. “Maybe I'm being too hard on them, biomancy was only discovered early in the first Principality, not that long before this happened, anyways it's probably a good thing that the spells were so poorly cast, or ponies likely would have gone extinct a long time ago ... or maybe the much quicker feedback would have convinced ponies to stop their foolishness. Entire bloodlines incapable of producing stallions would be rather conspicuous. Honestly, it boggles the mind. There are a few studies about the possible interactions between multiple decaying hereditary spells, but the idea of there being enough to make a critical mass strong enough to last thousands of years is bucking insane.”
There was a pause.
Twilight had an idea, “Wait ...” there was a magenta flash and suddenly Twilight had a book levitating in front of her 'The Complete Abridged History of the Mages Guild', “Yes, I was right. The convention of 121 RA.” He stated, as if that explained anything at all.
“What?”
“The Mages' Guild convention of 121 Regnum Alicornus. It was the largest convention the Mages' Guild held at any time since its founding, dwarfing even the infamous Convention on Umbrum and Corruption Magic. It was the convention that established the danger category of Grey Magic as well as the legal category of 'Forbidden', which is even more restrictive than 'Prohibited'. And, here, Biomancy was the first school of magic to be placed in both categories. Hah, take that historians, it wasn't alphabetization.”
“Okay, Twilight, slow down. I'm still not following.”
Instead of speaking, Twilight just levitated the book in front of Spike's snout.
'Curiously, the Convention of 121 – unlike every other convention prior or since – has no historically recorded reason for being called. While most historians believe that the Convention of 121 was a reaction to the deprivations of the Mad God during the Age of Chaos that had recently ended, but a few individuals assert – without a shred of evidence – that the convention was actually a response to some undetermined hypothetical event that they claim has been scoured from history.' “Oh ...”
Twilight was reading another another book levitating in front of him, this one titled 'Magicks Moste Foul: A History' “'Oh' indeed.” He spoke without looking up from his book “'Without a shred of evidence' my shaggy flank, 121 was – well – a hundred and twenty-one years after Discord's defeat, very few ponies would have even been alive for the Age of Chaos, why would the Mages' Guild suddenly react that way to something that happened so long ago.
Ah, and listen to this Spike, 'While biomancy was only given its name in 87RA, its first documented use was in 19 RA and many theorize that the school had actually been invented even earlier, perhaps even during the Age of Chaos; that claim that can neither be verified nor falsified, as – naturally – no records exist from that period.'” Twilight glanced at Spike, “It all fits together rather well.
Imagine this, some young noblemare births a son when she wanted a daughter. Perhaps it was her first pregnancy and it was rough enough that midwife was worried that she wouldn't survive another; as her house follows matrilineal primogeniture, like most noble houses, so she has no heir. She goes to her court mage with her problem and she's in luck, there's this brand new school of magic – it doesn't even have a proper name yet –that can solve her problem, just one spell and her son is now a daughter.”
“Matrilineal primowhatnow?”
“Matrilineal means that only female members of the house can inherit and primogeniture means that everything is inherited by the firstborn. While there's some historic evidence that the pre-Equestrian unicorn Lunar Clans were actually patrilineal, and the Pegasus Flights definitely followed egalitarian inheritance, the vast majority of modern noble houses are matrilineal and most of those practice primogeniture. And that has been the case since the Republican period.”
The evidence of the Lunar Clans being patrilineal was actually pretty controversial. There were more than a couple historic 'treatises' that were little more than an unhinged scree insulting the intelligence, heritage, education and morality of ponies who put credence into such evidence.
A number of psychologists had made a much stronger rebuttal, pointing out that stallions had – on average – a much higher agreeableness and neuroticism and a much lower openness and conscientiousness than mares. A temperament that was not well suited for leadership. One had even gone so far as imply that stallions were less intelligent on average than mares.
That paper had been retracted almost immediately, the author disappearing for three weeks before publicly apologizing for spreading 'mean lies'.
Spike looked sadly at the stallion who had formerly been a mare, “What about you, does that mean ...” he gestured at Twilight
“... that I'm disinherited? Hah, I wish.” Twilight scowled darkly, “Whenever someone makes a statement that includes 'most noble houses', House Twilight is almost always one of the exceptions. Often the only exception. 'We' Twilights really take pride in being different.” Twilight scoffs. “House Twilight's inheritance is egalitarian instead of matrilieal – meaning that there's no preference based on sex – and a weird hybrid system instead of strict primogeniture. I won't go into it, but there's a reason why I'm only the 'heir presumptive' instead of the 'heir apparent' despite being my mother's first child.”
Spike decided that discretion was the better part of valour, and did not venture into the milieu of why precisely Twilight not being disinherited was a bad thing. He then had a thought, “Wait, isn't Shining your older brother, shouldn't he be the 'heir presumptive'?”
“Shiny's my half brother, Spike. His mother, Soft Aegis, is my father's second wife.”
“Your parents are divorced?!” Spike asked before realizing how little sense that made; Shining was the older sibling.
Twilight looked at Spike in confusion, when had he even implied that? “Of course not, where did you even get that idea?”
“So your mother is your father's third wife?”
Twilight laughed, “Oh, that's good, Spike. No, that would be Spell Thought.”
Spike wondered just how many poor mares had that stallion gone through, “She's his fourth?”
“My father only has three wives, Spike.”
Spike in his mental calculus had missed the present tense in that last statement and thus he continued his attempt to fit together several seemingly mutually exclusive claims.
“So, where was I? Oh yes, mares all across Equestria are having their colts transformed into fillies. It has ceased to be something done out of necessity and is now an act of vanity. Getting newborn colts transformed into fillies was the First Principality equivalent of fancy exotic hoofbags. This goes on for a few generations, and then somepony notices that there are too few colts being born ...” Twilight trailed off and looked at the wyrmling who was staring into the distance, “Spike, you aren't listening at all.”
There was a brief pause before Spike came to a realization, “Your father is married to three mares.” he spoke in a daze.
Twilight tilted his head, “Yes? Is that not what I said?”
“Your father is married to three mares at the same time.”
“Yes ... are you okay, Spike?”
“Why is your father married to three mares?”
“Why wouldn't he be?”
Wut?
Twilight stared at the young dragon for several seconds before finally realizing the problem, “Sorry Spike, I forgot that monogamy is the norm in Equestria.” he said, rubbing the back of his head with a hoof in embarrassment.
Spike stared at the stallion incredulously, “You forgot monogamy is normal?”
“In my defence, I haven't exactly had much time to contemplate romance in these last couple decades.”
“Twilight, polygamy is illegal.”
Twilight scoffed and made a dismissive gesture with a hoof, “Of course it's not.”
Spike sighed, “This is another House Twilight thing, isn't it.”
Twilight recoiled as if struck. How could he have fallen so easily into such a Twilight mindset? Even after almost two decades under Princess Celestia? I'm sorry Princess Celestia, I'm a Bad Pony.
Spike put a claw over his face and let a long breath. Today had been illuminating,he was getting way way too intimate with Twilight's extensive stable of neuroses, many of which the wyrmling had just learned. He was already way past his daily budget for crazy. “Okay, Twilight what happened next with the colt transformation thing?”
“Uh, that's where things get pretty hard to guess. I have no idea how many generations it would take for the spell residue to become supercritical, or how long it took to discover the problem; although history seems to give an upper limit of 121 years, as I highly doubt ponies were pulling this nonsense in the Age of Chaos. So after that, a convention of the Mages' Guild is called, the spell is declared treason, biomancy is declared Forbidden Grey Magic and the disaster is averted in some unspecified way that probably involves either really shady magic or unethical equine experimentation. Probably both. Then the entire event is scoured from history.”
“Princess Celestia has quite a habit of doing that, doesn't she? Nightmare Moon, Discord, The Crystal Empire and Sombra, Tirek, this.”
“Hush, you, Princess Celestia knows what she's doing.”
Spike grunted noncommittally as he walked to the window of the library, “Uh, Twilight, it's late, like really late.”
Twilight trotted up beside the dragon and looked out into the dead of night, “That it is, Spike, that it is.” Twilight looked up to the moon – waxing gibbous – and was suddenly struck with an inequine impulse.
The stallion's grip slipped and the synthetic instincts stolen from an ancient extinct superpredator took over.
“AWOOOOOOOO!”
The window shattered outwards, failing under the unrelenting force of the unintentionally channelled Royal Canterlot Voice.
Twilight's irises narrowed to pinpricks as he watched the lights of Ponyville turn on one by one, his subjects waking in a panic.
“no no no no no no no no” Twilight repeated in a small voice. He had finally realized what the strange oddly familiar instincts that had been troubling him all day were, he had finally recognized them nearly two decades since he had felt them last. How could they be back? They were supposed to be gone, Princess Celestia had taught the young filly how to kill them. How to break the carceral power of the flesh under the supremacy of the intellect.
There was a flash of magenta and Spike was suddenly alone in the library.